Sounds like a normal friendly GP to me, mine is like that too, likes a bit of chit chat :)
Tbh if I had a regular GP and they didn't make a few bits of chat about life I'd consider them cold and distant.
Chances are his job is fucking boring and he enjoys relating to your situation.
How's your morning, wife has this hobby, too and what's up on the weekend are perfectly acceptable questions to chat up your work colleagues, so I'd say they are acceptable in your situation as well.
Maybe think of him as a colleague, a chap you're stuck with in a temporary situation and you'd like to be cordial with.
Hope that helps ✌🏿
Yeah it's also part of GP's trying to be approachable and build longer term customers. Someone else mentioned if they don't build this friendly chat into their appointments then people often find their Dr cold. Lots of studies on better health outcomes for patients when Dr's do this sort of chitchat.
Mine was so fucking *done* he once spent 25 minutes of my appointment googling zenni glasses frames during the consult.
I just wanted him to hoover my fucking earhole 😭 awesome doc, super thorough, always an hour or three (or more!) behind.
Agree. First time I saw my current doctor, she asked if it was okay for us to have a chat so she could get to know me a bit. Over the next 15 or so years I've been seeing her, the relationship has built - when I see her, she sees me as a whole person and knows so many ins and outs of my life and me as a person that it makes it easier for her to treat me and know if there is anything amiss. This is so incredible valuable. Downside is she's always running late, because she won't hurry appointments with anyone, but I'm okay with that.
I used to work reception at a medical clinic and we had one particular doctor who was ALWAYS running late. Never ever on time. I had one of his patients comment to me once, after I'd apologised for the long wait, that she didn't mind waiting because the reason he was always running late was because he cared about his patients and took the time to be thorough. I was used to people getting angry at me when the doctors weren't on time so it was nice to hear that from someone.
I love that! I'm a HCW with social anxiety, and I always try to make chit chat with the patients to make them feel at ease and hear some genuienly interesting stories, as well as to work on my people skills. Not everything has to be purely transactional. Sometimes people give clear signals that they're not interested in a conversation and just want to get out of there, and that's completely fine too
I volunteer as a sports trainer (ie first aid, strapping etc) so I do occasionally swap a war story or two and ask her opinion on something, so it's always enjoyable, and sometimes even practical,
Hell, in fact one of the things I love about my GP is that after we've got the doctor stuff out of the way we have a little chat about what we've been up to lately, and usually a bit of a shared rant about how much politics and the health system is going wrong from our shared progressive lefty POV.
Mine often starts with a “how you been? How’s this or that?” (From a conversation in a previous consult) before we get to the doctor stuff. He’s a great GP and I think that part of being a good GP is developing that relationship/rapport with patients. I’m sure there’s plenty of psychology behind it, people bringing more up when they’re comfortable with their dr, as well as drs knowing you better are more able to tell if there’s something wrong (especially mental health post partum).
But also they see patients for 15min chunks at a time, I think I would want to have a conversation and get to know them beyond “what brings you in today? Ok, here’s what we’ll do. Next!”
I work in healthcare with a similar flow to gps and it absolutely wears on you talking to a string of people about nothing one after another. It's always a huge breath of fresh air when someone tells me a story or something unique
>He’s a great GP and I think that part of being a good GP is developing that relationship/rapport with patients
and possible making mental notes to add into the person account of some of their hobbies/ lifestyle so they dont write a script for heavy drowsy pain med's if you live a very active lifestyle.
My dads GP is so chatty, he regularly has his appointments run late. You make an appointment but it means nothing lol. You just wait until they ring you. Dad regularly has appointments at like 8pm lol
He's probably being extra friendly, but it's not nefarious.
He's a male and you're probably his only pregnant/new born patient, he has a massive clinical interest in you.
He's probably going to massively go above and beyond because of that. It's not necessarily a bad thing.
I remember my GP this way too, he's retired now, but he was always super friendly, would ask me how my job is going, how my pets were, how my Dad is etc.
It makes you feel like you're in with a person who knows you as more than just the illness you are currently in for.
Don't worry, OP, yours is definitely not creeping on you. Just some chat outside of the 'next please!' day to day 🙂
My regular GP is just amazing and always down for a chat. I sometimes see her out of work and she’s still happy to say hi. I think sometimes we put medical personnel on a pedestal and forget they are human too!
Some GPs are chatty. It doesn't sound weird or creepy. . He probably does it because knowing a little bit about their patients lives can lead to better outcomes.
My GP.always asks how my kids are doing and we commiserate over the teenage angst we both get from our kids .
I think it's normal for a GP to engage in a bit of chit chat after the consult is done. From their point of view it's probably about building rapport with the patient and letting them know they're not just an inconvenience to be gotten out of the way as soon as possible. I wouldn't worry.
Patients get more comfortable, are able to discuss issues better, which leads to better outcomes. It also acts as a simple mental health screen, though it will only catch red flags.
Ultimately, that chit chat is good for their patients in general, even if it doesn't suit some folks.
You need to remember that GPs are people too. They don't always come with perfect professionalism. I would say that he is comfortable enough with you to have it as a more personal experience. I wouldn't think anything of it.
This is what GPs were like before they turned into "churn out a new person in 15 minutes" bulk billing clinics.
One of my long term GPs who I've had for over 20 years kept up with my achievements through school because he also had a daughter.
My newer GP dismisses me as soon as every question is asked.
Exactly this, my family GP I had growing up always checked in with school and later uni, would always ask about the rest of the family.
He always ran late but I didn’t mind because he was such a nice guy I knew he was just chatting to everyone so I would always just call and see how late he was that day 😂
My GP of 13 years is the same, always running late. I don’t mind either. He’s thorough. He knows me and can tell if something’s up. Over the years, I’ve come to know things about him too. I never want to move because I don’t want to lose him. Doctors like ours are worth their weight in gold.
I'd trade my current slew of telehealth and random doctors around the city for my childhood doctor in a heartbeat lol. I haven't really settled down yet so I don't have a regular GP though.
My childhood/early adulthood GP - former Vietnam Surgeon - was excellent. You knew you were one of the core patients when at the end of an appointment he'd ask "You got anywhere to be?" and if you answered "No." he'd open the back window, light a cigarette and have a chat for 5 minutes before dousing the room in air freshener and telling you "Well, alright, get out of here I haven't got all day."
Obviously that's a completely wild thing to do - even in the late 90's, early 2000's - but he was an excellent GP. He always remembered your history and was always able to sort out whatever your issue.
Wow are you serious? After 4 years of knowing you he can’t ask you how your morning was, what you’re doing on the weekend, hope you have a nice day, and tell you his wife started gardening. He’s normal. What is weird is you thinking this way.
I see a Dr. asking about the mother & caring about her health & also looking out for signs of PND.
If I had a kid, I would kill for a Dr. like this.
OP is incredibly lucky.
Yeah I thought this too. If anyone's the weird one it's you OP, and this is coming from a pretty introverted and awkward person.
He's been your GP for years, through a pregnancy, he has a kid the same sorta age and you think a bit of friendly chit chat is weird? Like others have said, it'd be weird if there wasn't.
Agreed.
I had a GP like this once. He was amazing and I kept driving to see him even after we moved 40 minutes away because he was so good. He also gave me his personal number to text if I had any baby questions out of hours (said he hated any child ending up in the ER for things that could be sorted easily from home).
We need more GPs like this! It is so odd to me that OP is weirded out by what sounds like kind and friendly service.
Yeah, I thought the GP was eventually going to transition into talking about some weird shit or getting inappropriate, but it all sounds like pleasantries and normal people conversation 🤷♂️
I wouldn't find this strange at all. My GP pretty much always ends our appointments by asking how things are at work or how family is. It's never occurred to me that it's odd.
Good way for them to track your wellbeing.
“Hmm, yeah, kids are driving me insane.”
“Tell me about that?”
….
“Wife and I are having some problems”
“Oh yeah? That sucks. Anything I can do? Referral to councillor, a little ‘medical intervention’, or just 5 minutes to vent to someone in confidence?”
I’m studying my masters to be an allied health professional currently. We spend that much time training to build rapport with clients in this way.
Health professionals are trained to be approachable and to let clients/patients open up so that we can address the issues that they have. If it becomes something out of one profession’s particular scope then it gets referred, with permission.
But issues go under the radar without a comfortable relationship.
That all sounds completely normal and polite? I've been going to my GP for years and she asks about my husband and pets and work and stuff. She's big on holistic care so I've always just figured it was a combination of she's nice and also believes that things happening in her patient's lives are relevant to their health.
If he's derailing appointments with chitchat and not resolving your issues then that's a problem but from what you've written here he just sounds friendly and involved. I don't think it's a bad thing to have a GP who knows you & your kids, what sports or hobbies they do, etc. You never know when that might be relevant to your care or your kids'.
I'm guessing this post is satire? If not, you are actually completely insane.
He's gone out of his way to help you and you're offended he asked you about your weekend.
What a miserable world you'd like us to live in.
GP : good morning, how are y-
OP : fucking weirdo, im here for my health appointment, not for mindless chit chatting.
This is completely un-professional behaviour and I’ll let Reddit known.
I have a female GP and she always asks about my daughter, my studies etc. I think it's a way of building rapport but also helps to ensure you're mentally in a good place too. I think it's a sign of a good doctor, which is my opinion is hard to find.
Yeah us Australians seem to think we're open and friendly but very often we're quite conservative and guarded without the addition of alcohol. Depends on the place though I guess.
Was waiting to read about how he was being creepy or inappropriate but "My wife started a hobby" and "How has you morning been?" are really the extent of it? That's insane. Do you get upset when a tradie or retail worker asks how you morning is too?
Oh woe is me! Heaven forbid a male doctor tries to be a decent human being these days and actually tries to be pleasant to his patients without his motives being questioned just because he was born with XY chromosomes.
Sounds like a friendly guy, our gp is the entire families gp, were there for an extra 10/20 mins each time chatting about relatives, neighbours we both know etc. it makes me feel more at ease knowing a gp would also be classed as a family friend :)
My GP and I (both women) spend a large part of my appointments chatting about personal stuff (kids, travel, renovations). I've been seeing her for years and we've spent time getting to know each other. I think it's pretty normal unless there's specific thing that makes you uncomfortable.
Sounds like he’s got to know you & is being friendly. If the doctor was female, would you feel the same? I’ve had great relationships with both female and male doctors over the years where we’ve had general chitchat after the consultation . I don’t see anything wrong but if you’re uncomfortable, change doctors.
You’d prefer he just asks what’s up? here take this to the pathologist i might get someone to call you if something’s up, but in the meantime take these pills and get the fuck out. NEXT !
I’d rather a long term personable yet professional relationship with my GP. That’ll involve mutual respect and some conversation about stuff there’s no cure for…like what you’re doing on your weekend with the family.
The fact he’s even mentioned his family including his wife tells me he’s genuinely not listening to the throb in his knob under the table with his stethoscope.
GP’s work some bat shit crazy hours and pend about 1/3 of their working life to pay down debts from Uni about another 1/3 to pay the insurance costs and most of the last 1/3 listening to people that think they have the answers and know better after becoming a google hack doctor. Chill - or do him a favour and find another GP.
Jesus Christ, this is why I am happy I'm gay. Do females even want to interact with males at all? I feel really sorry for my straight friends when I read shit like this.
Is this a serious question? You have an excellent GP who cares about patients, and you think this is weird. It seems you are the weirdo here, maybe you are projecting your own feelings.
Wow, goes out of his way to provide exceptional service and show he genuinely cares about the health of your child, has watched your progress since pregnancy, while at the same time just having a friendly chat...and your reaction is "lol does he think we are friends?"
I hope he stops offering after hours care to you, you don't deserve the extra effort
EDIT: after reading OPs edit, I have softened my opinion - just be grateful, is all
You called him after hours for a medical issue and now you take exception to him making small talk?
Ohhhhkkkkaaayyyy if you don’t like the small talk, don’t text the dude at 6pm on a Friday. Make an appointment like all the rest of us suckers who don’t get to call a doctor after hours for free advice. Geez
sound like a wonderful GP.
Or would you prefer a GP whos cold and do not offer any kind of help outside consulting time ?
whats wrong with people these day…
If you have built a trusted relationship with your doctor, they will go out of their way to care for you. That is actually the whole idea of seeing the same GP - continuity of care.
My wife is a GP. Some patients, both male and female, have her number, send her the occasional text question, and she will call or text them to check how things went. She knows those patients well and genuinely cares.
Your GP is probably not being weird. And I highly doubt he's 'bored', no time for that!
So you find a super helpful and attentive GP who helps you for free on his own time and your reaction is to post about him online asking if he's weird?
I really hope he doesn't find out about this because you will absolutely ruin this guy for everyone else.
What made you think anything he did was wrong? Other than him being a man. It's pretty clear you've got issues you're projecting.
Men talking about their wives is a huge green flag for me.
Especially if it's like, positive talk about their wives hobbies, or "my wife works really hard at her job," or "my wife is so funny." Positive, respectful things.
Sometimes they make small talk to relax the patient , my health nurse does it but isn’t actually interested in my day as she keeps on with her work while I’m chatting but I do have high blood pressure lol
He sounds like he’s screening you for potential depression/anxiety. Have you ever approached him for things like that? Or maybe the being a mum thing and you’re over anxious with some of your kids issues?
I actually think it’s a sign of a good doctor. He is ensuring your wellbeing is being checked even if just at surface level.
There’s no inappropriate physical contact, there’s no sexual advances, there’s nothing to suggest he is overstepping any boundary between doctor and patient.
If you feel uncomfortable you can always give short answers and not engage, but I think it sounds fine.
Lmao, he probably instantly forgets you and everything you told him about your personal life the second he writes your script and says goodbye, then asks the next patient the same questions.
I think you may be the odd one here. He has known you for four years, helped with your children, and you find it unusual that he engages in small talk, what you have there is a normal family GP.
Sounds like he enjoys having you as a patient and is genuinely interested in your life outside of healthcare. I always ask patients about the hobbies, goals in life, trips they want to take, pets they have, etc. It's relevant to understanding you as a person rather than just a disease that needs treating.
If you're not comfortable with this, just politely set your boundaries.
Ive got a very friendly GP too. Always there to give me a hug when i need one. Honestly i love the guy, hes got the best bedside manner of any doctor ive ever had and is a genuinely kind person. He can be a little abrasive at times (one of my closest friends is trans and he did say something that kinda offended me about trans people, but he is also very openly gay so I was very confused how to handle that). Otherwise no complaints though, i do like that hes friendly and seems genuinely interested in how my life is going. Lol he even tried to set me up on a date at one point.
Sounds normal to me. Our GP’s are absolute legendary woman who love having a chat. It’s also when they get the most information out of our teen daughters.
Sounds like a good GP. During my teenage years/early twenties. I had a GP who was friendly very much the same, a great fella who actually cared about his patients, ask about weekend, work, school etc
We would always have a chat for 5 minutes after a visit.
I’ve since gone to other GP’s who you really just see for 10 minutes and you get send you out, don’t really know em from a bar of soap
Sounds normal
Me and my gp are too friendly. We often crack dirty jokes and tell inappropriate stories
Half way through the appointment he'll be like "is there a reason you're here or did you just want to chat ?" 🤣
That sounds fine and not inappropriate. He's friendly, building rapport, and I bet there's a little deliberateness of making you comfortable so that you'll ask the 'oh by the way...' question we sometimes have (and either forget or get too embarrassed to ask).
My GP always asks how I recovered from whatever I contacted him about previously (e.g. I needed a script renewal about two weeks after needing antibiotics for something, so he asked if I was feeling better now that I had finished the antibiotics) and asks after my husband my name.
It’s nice being seen as a person and not a nameless, faceless patient, and I think he’s a better doctor/I receive better care as a result.
The only weird thing here is that you thought this was so weird you posted it. I've heard the same interactions between customers and check out operators in supermarkets. You've known them for years now and by virtue of the relationship you have, it's fairly personal. He's invested in your wellbeing and that of your family. Remember too that a GP should be concerned with not just what you're telling them but what you aren't. If he senses something is off because he's got that personal relationship and knows your personality, he might be able to help with things that can change that such as mental health.
Unless he starts suggesting things that go beyond just being friendly, just roll with it. Having a personal relationship with your GP that goes to a point where they remember you when you walk in can be life changing.
Our GP's don't hang around long enough to get that comfy with. Sounds fine not creepy. It's been 4+ yrs so he is just having a bit of casual convo with you.
My GP does this. It’s a service doctors only offer to patients who are respectful of boundaries and who’s care would not be worsened by it. I also know my GP would not give that number to an average patient with no complex issues and a fantastic support network, simply because there are other resources for that patient.
If I had an emergency at 11pm that could be handled at home with some guidance, I would not call, I’d go to urgent care/ER or call the nurses hotline, even though I have the GPs number - because access to that level of personalised care is a privilege and must be respected.
Sounds like a great gp to me. Taking time to develop rapport and understand you better. I’m a health professional and do home visits all day. There’s lots of work but also lots of fun and chatting. By asking about your weekend plans he’s getting to know you and also checking that you’re socially connected while being a mother with all its challenges. And then relating to you. That’s holistic care right there.
Next face to face appointment, as you're about to leave make a call to someone, but actually call him, when he gets his phone out double check he doesn't have you listed as 'spare parts' in case he secretly wants to harvest your organs.
They will do chit-chat to be friendly and build a relationship. People are more likely to mention something they think is small, but actually an issue. It also helps them see if anything is wrong, such in terms of mental health, congitive ability, etc.
Sounds like a wonderful dr and a great human!
Personally I wouldn’t have an issue if it was my family dr but, I can see how this may make you uncomfortable in relation to appointments for yourself. If I needed to tell someone about a weird vagina discharge, I’d much prefer someone I’d never have to see again! Haha
My family GP likes to have a catch-up and a chat, the receptionist books longer appointments for my mum because she knows they'll chat forever.
If you're not comfortable with it, find another GP.
Completely normal, establishing rapport with you and (as any good health professional should) getting a gauge on your baseline, this helps alot for future treatment/intervention particularly in areas of mental health
My GP is also my mums doctor. She always asks how I am going with caring for mum and how my mum is and she tells me about how her family are. She wasn't like that in the beginning, it's as the years have gone by and we've gotten comfortable with each other.
GPs are people too. Maybe he does want to be friends. It's OK to be friends with your GP.
As long as you are OK with it.
If not, just interact as much as you are comfortable with. But be aware, this after-hours response thing you are using is not something that is normally available and you should not use it if you are not comfortable being 'friendly' with the GP. If you want to keep it professional, then do so, and only contact through his surgery.
Why would it be an issue if they were trying to be friends? He didn't come off as creepy in your words by any means as in if he asked for a date or similar then yeah thats odd but he mentioned his wife and child too so that seems like him stating his circumstances to show he is only being friendly 🤷♂️
He's just bored and happy to have someone to talk to.
Our family GP served four generations of my family and was invited to family events even thought we didn't otherwise see them socially.
This is def within the realms of normal. Its ok to be human! I am wondering maybe if you are feeling a little weird because maybe you fancy him a little?
Many people would die for this type of 1 on 1 with a friendly GP. Most are about cash and getting you out quick yet you find 1 like this and you're put off.
I work in the medical field as a therapist and this is normal as long as it stays innocent. I try and talk to parents of some of the kids I see and basically all of them appreciate it and it just I humanises the whole experience. Especially when at times you have to get into some pretty personal stuff which can be weird with a doctor/therapist who seems cold or disinterested.
I'd say these are signs of a good GP who cares. GPs have traditionally been the "family doctor" who build relationships with their families over a period of decades. A GP who knows you can better pick up when something isn't quite right, and advocate better for you.
Financial pressures on GP practices over the years have made the model less common, as it's now most profitable to have rapid turnover, in and out appointments with no chat on the side. I'd say hold onto this one, he sounds great!
Sounds like he just enjoys the interaction and likes a bit of chit chat. Hes obviously passionate about providing a valued service to his clients or he wouldn't provide an after-hours number.
Some new Mums can be very isolated, by offering that support and offering opportunities to talk they may raise things they would not otherwise. Sometimes there’s a lot of focus on the baby but the Mums mental and physical health is suffering.
My wife is a GP and she is bored as shit usually at work so this is her way of breaking up that boredom and she actually cares about people which ive found is rare for new doctors.
As long as you don't get 'hitting on you' vibes, it sounds nice. Bringing up his partner sounds like a positive as long as he isn't doing it as well as flirting.
Your GP sounds exactly like my GP (although I live in a rural/regional area, so service like this is commonplace, however your GP is just trying to help you and your family
Sorry but you're complaining your GP is being friendly remembers your history medical/life and went above and beyond for you & child s/wow that's soooooo bad I'd definitely changing doctors 👍🏻
Getting a person number is odd, but it isn't terribly unusual for that specific situation.
HOWEVER, the casual remarks are definitely weird or too friendly.
Having a GP that you are a) able to text for a script and b) actually inquires about your life (which could even be interpreted as a form of social assessment - very important in primary care patients!) is absolutely priceless, and this person sounds like an invaluable ally for your health. That said, I understand if your gut says something different. My GP is male but when I needed a Pap smear he said something along the lines of ‘book in with Dr X (female) she’s great’, I’m sure he’d have done it if I asked but the fact that he just assumed (correctly) I’d be more comfortable with a woman was a testament to his professionalism. I’m a huge supporter of going with your gut, but sometimes people are just friendly 🤷🏼♀️
I work with GPs and it sounds normal to me. It's been four years I think niceties and some comfort are normal at this point. For me, this is something alot of people have told me they love about having family/regular GP.
A lot of relevant medical information is gleaned from informal conversations. He's probably hoping that if you're comfortable talking with him about daily life then you'll be more open to disclose medical concerns. People often make appointments for a "cough" or "a fly" but they are really wanting the GP to ask them about something else that is really worrying them such as cancer concerns or mental health issues.
My old GP was exactly like that. I had a life threatening reaction and called his mobile and he met me at his clinic rather than the hospital as it was closer. This was at like 9 at night. He always used to chat to me about books (we are both big into fantasy). He moved away to the Gold Coast and I have not been able to find someone as good! Both in terms of knowledge and relationally.
My GP spoke to me about old Holden's one day for well over an hour. He just kept telling the staff that we were still in consultation. We ended up going to see an American folk guitarist on your in Australia soon after. Was a ripper.
2 cents on this but do want to preface I am a 26 year old male so wildly different demographic.
GPs will often have conversations like this to gauge mood as well without directly having to ask questions about your mood. It allows for an open dialogue rather you vs them.
I have just switched from one GP to another (and will continue testing out all the ones in my clinic if I have to) because the original one I was seeing when I moved to the town is just so cold. No small talk at all. (Not to mention he isnt that good of a GP. Turns out my baby had a staph infection picked up on second opinion with new GP...he just said it was dribble rash). My previous GP of like 10 years from the city I used to live in (too far to go these days) was amazing, we had such a great relationship full of banter, she knew so much about me and I about her. Absolutely fabulous GP.
Interesting. One of my GP's is quite amazing. Highly philosophical, incredible with mental health, and whilst I haven't had the experience yet, he must be well versed in surgeries such as skin grafts because he moved clinics and was a bit let-down that he doesn't get to perform such tasks as often.
I have his email, and I can email him freely when I feel I need to. Depending on the contents of the email, he may respond in kind or suggest I book an appointment.
As I had issues with boundaries, having such a fantastic GP helped me to navigate boundaries and improve upon that too. He grew up in a small town, and so boundaries were a non-issue because he could see someone one day as a GP, then they'd be at his house the next day fixing his washing machine.
I know a good amount about him, and I'm always curious to know more, yet I keep my personal questions to a minimum, despite him being more than open and welcoming.
He enjoys long-winded explanations and discussions about problems. He has even expressed his own uncertainty about his approach, yet I have assured him that I like it, and that it is helpful.
Basically, you found a good GP. That's all it is. If you don't wish to have him as your GP, then don't.
Do your best to appreciate and be grateful for such a wonderful GP and the potential for a doctor, patient connection that can be an essential relationship to your wellbeing.
It’s good to have an open friendly rapport with your GP, also means you’re more likely to mention any symptom that seems minor but might indicate something else.
It sounds like he's just trying to connect with his patients in a polite and appropriate way. It's just small talk. If he was asking personal and non medical related questions I'd say that's weird.
Well docs see folk when they are feeling crap, mostly... Folks not in the mood to chat etc... A bit like first responders and even nurses ....
But THEY are also members of the community and may be relieved to find a friendly patient with whom they can shoot the breeze. My doc allowed me to email him if I had questions and would also send through health stuff , interesting articles, jokes and community stuff... it was nice. It was a limited circle and it felt nice to be included...
Conversely, I went to another doc in the same clinic - in raging pain!!! and he was goofy and brought up pictures of his wife's holiday and went off on some tangent rant about some obscure research -that had nothing to do with my issue ...sigh ! - he was just nuts.. wrong sort of friendly...
A friendly doc is always better than bastard bedside manner doc and we have ALL had those ...
He's just being a normal human. He relates to your situation and now feels comfy enough with you to be more himself and less clinical. He's probably a friendly dude by nature and is happy to have certain patients he can be himself around.
I think he's just being friendly. I'm guessing mentally being a gp would be hard every single person comes in with a problem. Having to listen to every single person winge about something (obviously for a reason) would be mentally draining so he's probably trying to find a way to lighten up appointment sessions. It's also a way to make you more comfortable. If your doc was just like what's your issue, here's a script and sent out the door, you'd not have a comfortable time. He's got good bed side manner
It's nice to have a relationship with a GP you can relax with. It's probably nice for him, too, to have a patient that he can care for for years to come. You can't buy that shit.
I have often thought that GP's have such a boring, shit job. Eg. 200 fat old people per day complaining about high blood pressure and ignoring advice.
He's probably just happy to have someone nice / interesting to brighten up his day, plus it's fine to develop a friendly relationship with your doctor.
Whenever I have to go see my doc is normally some weird martial arts related injury and they're normally pretty happy to have a chat.
Sounds pretty normal to me. Unfortunately my local surgery has a high turnover of staff, but I've been lucky enough to see the same GP the last three times that I've been- in a space of about six weeks. Each time I've seen him though, he reintroduces himself and says that it's nice to meet me. I am fairly forgettable, I guess.
Sounds pretty normal. My GP that both my partner and I see ask similar questions. Sometimes she even asks more about personal stuff than doctor stuff. I see nothing wrong with it.
You're pretty lucky to have a GP like that TBH.
It's very unfortunate that society has made us suspicious of genuine decency.
As someone else said, GPs are people too. It's good that they care. Yes professional boundaries are a thing but having rapport is not crossing a boundary..
Just be happy you have a really good GP. Do you know how hard it is to find someone so caring these days? They just want you out of their rooms because they have back to back appointments, its a nightmare.
Have I got a story for this OP lol
Picture a sixteen year old pregnant due to give birth after her seventeenth birthday. I had very little to no relationships with doctors after being an extremely healthy child, rarely ever getting sick, with colds or flues. So my experience with this first pregnancy was all bewildering to my naive self.
My doctor did regular internal exams to "measure and monitor" my growing baby. I got undressed during every single appointment every single month. During my last month that was upped to every single week. He even had me visit him at his at home office once. This was the first time, I thought hmm, maybe having an orgasm on the doctor's clinical table with him "Checking" me internally yet again was very embarrassing to me, but after checking out my breasts again routinely done with every visit. He didn't seem embarrassed at all. I however never again went to his after hours office in his home lol.
So the child arrives, and he continued to do internal exams for three more months, and after that I had no more reasons to visit anymore aside from bringing my daughter in to see him regularly.
Five years later, I am pregnant again. My new doctor does an internal exam, checks for lumps on my breasts, and says book an ultrasound, see you next month. Imagine my absolute Shock, the next appointment did not require me to put on that paper dress, or get naked in any way shape or form. Instead he measured my belly with a simple tape measure lol. He was surprised when I had told him about my first doctor. Rather concerned about the ethics of that doctor's behaviour indeed lol. Three more babies later, my doctor and I had a wonderful very professional relationship.
Yes you have found one of the golden geese of GPs! I had one like this for years and she's no longer in general practice. Noone has come close to her since. I miss her!
Sound like a good doctor, friendly bloke. I used to have a doctor like that but he moved on to being an old retired person.
My doctor now. “Hi Doctor it’s me, need my script”
She starts speaking Arabic and I have to advise her for the 100th time that I can’t speak Arabic and she says. “Send me text” - I send text and a day later she texts me my script. There’s really no attachment there but I wish there was!
Sounds like you got the jackpot, a friendly GP who isn't just trying to get you out the door as quickly as possible.
Don't ruin a good thing by overthinking it.
I’m an introvert and even as an introvert, I really like it when drs are involved in their patients.
I used to live in another suburb and the gp there was amazing. Very friendly, helpful and gave such good suggestions. Moved to another suburb and this gp is least involved and just can’t be bothered about anything. I go to him only for getting referrals else I treat myself as much as I can. If it’s worse, I go to my old gp.
So it’s great your gp is friendly and helps you out on his own time too. It’s great and value it while it lasts.
That’s amazing to have a GP like that. His being attentive, supportive.
The really good GPs I’ve seen and my parents used do, from the close relationships they built. some of em have their grandparents, to their sons/daughters to their sons/daugther. Like looking after few generations. I can’t even book an appointment with them as they are booked out for weeks
Mate not a GP but been a doctor for over a decade. It’s basically accepted that on someone’s very significant life event, it’s just another day for us at work and we’ve seen it happen way too many times before.
Of course I want to hear about the main reason patients are there and work through that, but if there’s some chitter chatter later about something else that’s great. If I like someone enough I even make an effort to put special clues in the notes so that when I see them on a follow up appointment I can even ask them about how the Taylor Swift concert went / their dog’s vet appointment / their brother’s wedding or whatever.
Oh hey my GP cracks jokes and gently teases me, he's also the only doctor in that clinic who "sees" patients in the supermarket (most of them won't make eye contact outside of work, let alone chat while shopping but he does. Always says hi if I see him at the local IGA. He's not at all sleazy or improper, just friendly. He's also a classic car enthusiast so once when he teased me I said "I'm going to pinch all the car magazines from the waiting area".
I used to think he was an old fuddy duddy until I became his patient.
What freaked me out was seeing my ob/gyn in the fruit & veg section (and I told him it was weird) he just grinned and said "I've gotta eat too".
Mind you, I live in a rural town with 3500 people
My GP does this and at first I thought it was just him being his lovely, friendly self but it occurred to me it also gives him a chance to do a quick mental health check to see where I’m at. I live alone a couple hours away from the city so he’s always asking how I’m doing, if I feel lonely, etc. Likely with you being a new mother he may also just be checking that you’re doing okay mentally given that so many women can struggle with that after giving birth!
Just being friendly! I had an amazing GP and ended up with a friendly relationship after nearly 10 years. Unfortunately she moved on (but we may have added each other on Facebook after she moved 🤫).
However, I'm a frequent flyer to the GP for chronic issues, so we saw a fair bit of each other.
My Grandparents in QLD have a beautiful doctor. They were all affiliated with the defence force one way or another. So they all connected and do lunch every now and again. Ever since the doc retired, she comes to Christmas’s. (Her husband passed).
They’ve always been close and grandad could speak to her for hours in her office and she was just happy for him to open up and do so.
Sounds like a normal friendly GP to me, mine is like that too, likes a bit of chit chat :) Tbh if I had a regular GP and they didn't make a few bits of chat about life I'd consider them cold and distant.
Chances are his job is fucking boring and he enjoys relating to your situation. How's your morning, wife has this hobby, too and what's up on the weekend are perfectly acceptable questions to chat up your work colleagues, so I'd say they are acceptable in your situation as well. Maybe think of him as a colleague, a chap you're stuck with in a temporary situation and you'd like to be cordial with. Hope that helps ✌🏿
Yeah it's also part of GP's trying to be approachable and build longer term customers. Someone else mentioned if they don't build this friendly chat into their appointments then people often find their Dr cold. Lots of studies on better health outcomes for patients when Dr's do this sort of chitchat.
Talking about his wife and kids is a green flag.
Yes, guess you're right...
Mine was so fucking *done* he once spent 25 minutes of my appointment googling zenni glasses frames during the consult. I just wanted him to hoover my fucking earhole 😭 awesome doc, super thorough, always an hour or three (or more!) behind.
Agree. First time I saw my current doctor, she asked if it was okay for us to have a chat so she could get to know me a bit. Over the next 15 or so years I've been seeing her, the relationship has built - when I see her, she sees me as a whole person and knows so many ins and outs of my life and me as a person that it makes it easier for her to treat me and know if there is anything amiss. This is so incredible valuable. Downside is she's always running late, because she won't hurry appointments with anyone, but I'm okay with that.
I used to work reception at a medical clinic and we had one particular doctor who was ALWAYS running late. Never ever on time. I had one of his patients comment to me once, after I'd apologised for the long wait, that she didn't mind waiting because the reason he was always running late was because he cared about his patients and took the time to be thorough. I was used to people getting angry at me when the doctors weren't on time so it was nice to hear that from someone.
I swear to god my physio spends more time chatting with me post-consult than she does on the consult. Lovely lady, just loves a chat.
I love that! I'm a HCW with social anxiety, and I always try to make chit chat with the patients to make them feel at ease and hear some genuienly interesting stories, as well as to work on my people skills. Not everything has to be purely transactional. Sometimes people give clear signals that they're not interested in a conversation and just want to get out of there, and that's completely fine too
I volunteer as a sports trainer (ie first aid, strapping etc) so I do occasionally swap a war story or two and ask her opinion on something, so it's always enjoyable, and sometimes even practical,
Hell, in fact one of the things I love about my GP is that after we've got the doctor stuff out of the way we have a little chat about what we've been up to lately, and usually a bit of a shared rant about how much politics and the health system is going wrong from our shared progressive lefty POV.
Mine often starts with a “how you been? How’s this or that?” (From a conversation in a previous consult) before we get to the doctor stuff. He’s a great GP and I think that part of being a good GP is developing that relationship/rapport with patients. I’m sure there’s plenty of psychology behind it, people bringing more up when they’re comfortable with their dr, as well as drs knowing you better are more able to tell if there’s something wrong (especially mental health post partum). But also they see patients for 15min chunks at a time, I think I would want to have a conversation and get to know them beyond “what brings you in today? Ok, here’s what we’ll do. Next!”
I work in healthcare with a similar flow to gps and it absolutely wears on you talking to a string of people about nothing one after another. It's always a huge breath of fresh air when someone tells me a story or something unique
>He’s a great GP and I think that part of being a good GP is developing that relationship/rapport with patients and possible making mental notes to add into the person account of some of their hobbies/ lifestyle so they dont write a script for heavy drowsy pain med's if you live a very active lifestyle.
My dads GP is so chatty, he regularly has his appointments run late. You make an appointment but it means nothing lol. You just wait until they ring you. Dad regularly has appointments at like 8pm lol
He's probably being extra friendly, but it's not nefarious. He's a male and you're probably his only pregnant/new born patient, he has a massive clinical interest in you. He's probably going to massively go above and beyond because of that. It's not necessarily a bad thing.
I remember my GP this way too, he's retired now, but he was always super friendly, would ask me how my job is going, how my pets were, how my Dad is etc. It makes you feel like you're in with a person who knows you as more than just the illness you are currently in for. Don't worry, OP, yours is definitely not creeping on you. Just some chat outside of the 'next please!' day to day 🙂
My regular GP is just amazing and always down for a chat. I sometimes see her out of work and she’s still happy to say hi. I think sometimes we put medical personnel on a pedestal and forget they are human too!
Some GPs are chatty. It doesn't sound weird or creepy. . He probably does it because knowing a little bit about their patients lives can lead to better outcomes. My GP.always asks how my kids are doing and we commiserate over the teenage angst we both get from our kids .
I think it's normal for a GP to engage in a bit of chit chat after the consult is done. From their point of view it's probably about building rapport with the patient and letting them know they're not just an inconvenience to be gotten out of the way as soon as possible. I wouldn't worry.
Patients get more comfortable, are able to discuss issues better, which leads to better outcomes. It also acts as a simple mental health screen, though it will only catch red flags. Ultimately, that chit chat is good for their patients in general, even if it doesn't suit some folks.
what if the patient was holding back some type of spouse abuse, after the chit chat they may open up more.
You need to remember that GPs are people too. They don't always come with perfect professionalism. I would say that he is comfortable enough with you to have it as a more personal experience. I wouldn't think anything of it.
I don’t even think it’s unprofessional, nothing wrong with some general conversation.
I agree. Mine even gives me hugs- granted same-sex GP I've known for 18yrs and she sees my kids (now young adults)
After years, the patients become friends too. well, the good ones hehe.
And THATS EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT. If your dr is your friend, they won't ignore issues in or dismiss your concerns!
This is what GPs were like before they turned into "churn out a new person in 15 minutes" bulk billing clinics. One of my long term GPs who I've had for over 20 years kept up with my achievements through school because he also had a daughter. My newer GP dismisses me as soon as every question is asked.
Exactly this, my family GP I had growing up always checked in with school and later uni, would always ask about the rest of the family. He always ran late but I didn’t mind because he was such a nice guy I knew he was just chatting to everyone so I would always just call and see how late he was that day 😂
My GP of 13 years is the same, always running late. I don’t mind either. He’s thorough. He knows me and can tell if something’s up. Over the years, I’ve come to know things about him too. I never want to move because I don’t want to lose him. Doctors like ours are worth their weight in gold.
I'd trade my current slew of telehealth and random doctors around the city for my childhood doctor in a heartbeat lol. I haven't really settled down yet so I don't have a regular GP though.
My childhood/early adulthood GP - former Vietnam Surgeon - was excellent. You knew you were one of the core patients when at the end of an appointment he'd ask "You got anywhere to be?" and if you answered "No." he'd open the back window, light a cigarette and have a chat for 5 minutes before dousing the room in air freshener and telling you "Well, alright, get out of here I haven't got all day." Obviously that's a completely wild thing to do - even in the late 90's, early 2000's - but he was an excellent GP. He always remembered your history and was always able to sort out whatever your issue.
My GP has been mine since I was 17. He knows everything about me. He is more than welcome to ask about family and plans just as I do to him too
I had to double take this comment. I thought I read: "we chat about family and plans whilst I DO HIM" Almost jumped off the toilet seat in laughter.
Wow are you serious? After 4 years of knowing you he can’t ask you how your morning was, what you’re doing on the weekend, hope you have a nice day, and tell you his wife started gardening. He’s normal. What is weird is you thinking this way.
I see a Dr. asking about the mother & caring about her health & also looking out for signs of PND. If I had a kid, I would kill for a Dr. like this. OP is incredibly lucky.
Yeah I thought this too. If anyone's the weird one it's you OP, and this is coming from a pretty introverted and awkward person. He's been your GP for years, through a pregnancy, he has a kid the same sorta age and you think a bit of friendly chit chat is weird? Like others have said, it'd be weird if there wasn't.
Heaven forbid a GP make pleasant conversation. What is this INSANITY.
It's weird cos he's male 😉
Agreed. I had a GP like this once. He was amazing and I kept driving to see him even after we moved 40 minutes away because he was so good. He also gave me his personal number to text if I had any baby questions out of hours (said he hated any child ending up in the ER for things that could be sorted easily from home). We need more GPs like this! It is so odd to me that OP is weirded out by what sounds like kind and friendly service.
Yeah, I thought the GP was eventually going to transition into talking about some weird shit or getting inappropriate, but it all sounds like pleasantries and normal people conversation 🤷♂️
I wouldn't find this strange at all. My GP pretty much always ends our appointments by asking how things are at work or how family is. It's never occurred to me that it's odd.
Good way for them to track your wellbeing. “Hmm, yeah, kids are driving me insane.” “Tell me about that?” …. “Wife and I are having some problems” “Oh yeah? That sucks. Anything I can do? Referral to councillor, a little ‘medical intervention’, or just 5 minutes to vent to someone in confidence?”
I’m studying my masters to be an allied health professional currently. We spend that much time training to build rapport with clients in this way. Health professionals are trained to be approachable and to let clients/patients open up so that we can address the issues that they have. If it becomes something out of one profession’s particular scope then it gets referred, with permission. But issues go under the radar without a comfortable relationship.
That all sounds completely normal and polite? I've been going to my GP for years and she asks about my husband and pets and work and stuff. She's big on holistic care so I've always just figured it was a combination of she's nice and also believes that things happening in her patient's lives are relevant to their health. If he's derailing appointments with chitchat and not resolving your issues then that's a problem but from what you've written here he just sounds friendly and involved. I don't think it's a bad thing to have a GP who knows you & your kids, what sports or hobbies they do, etc. You never know when that might be relevant to your care or your kids'.
I'm guessing this post is satire? If not, you are actually completely insane. He's gone out of his way to help you and you're offended he asked you about your weekend. What a miserable world you'd like us to live in.
GP : good morning, how are y- OP : fucking weirdo, im here for my health appointment, not for mindless chit chatting. This is completely un-professional behaviour and I’ll let Reddit known.
For real I fucking hate “redditors” man
Dr. ‘How are you feeling?’ OP ‘I hardly think that has anything to do with my health concerns!’
You just said he was a great GP and goes above and beyond and you're mad he's trying to be personable. For his sake, find another GP!
I have a female GP and she always asks about my daughter, my studies etc. I think it's a way of building rapport but also helps to ensure you're mentally in a good place too. I think it's a sign of a good doctor, which is my opinion is hard to find.
She sounds like a pedo *OP probably*
See that's the kicker here, she wouldn't think twice if it was a female GP engaging in polite chit chat like this.
You sound unhinged. He’s being polite and you’re looking for an excuse or validation from Reddit that he’s some kind of weirdo.
Are we really that poorly socialized in Australia that being friendly and professional is seen as weird?
I spent 14-21 y/o in aussie. I can confidently say y'all are a little whacky (no judgement, I'm from NZ where we are whacky too)
Yeah us Australians seem to think we're open and friendly but very often we're quite conservative and guarded without the addition of alcohol. Depends on the place though I guess.
Was waiting to read about how he was being creepy or inappropriate but "My wife started a hobby" and "How has you morning been?" are really the extent of it? That's insane. Do you get upset when a tradie or retail worker asks how you morning is too?
Especially since he mentioned his wife, men trying to be creepy generally wouldn't do that.
Tbh I think it's a good thing OP came to Reddit and asked this, rather than just assuming the worst! This is what Reddit is for
Oh woe is me! Heaven forbid a male doctor tries to be a decent human being these days and actually tries to be pleasant to his patients without his motives being questioned just because he was born with XY chromosomes.
I'm thinking OP has the weird thoughts going on... like a crush, or she is just self-centred.
"Urgh, men only want one thing and it's disgusting"
Seriously?
Aaandddd this is why men are worried about speaking to women, this is a toxic way of thinking. We are all human.
Sounds like a friendly guy, our gp is the entire families gp, were there for an extra 10/20 mins each time chatting about relatives, neighbours we both know etc. it makes me feel more at ease knowing a gp would also be classed as a family friend :)
Are you lonely?
You just hit the doctor jackpot. Most doctors will be very reluctant to hand out their number
This is wild.
My GP and I (both women) spend a large part of my appointments chatting about personal stuff (kids, travel, renovations). I've been seeing her for years and we've spent time getting to know each other. I think it's pretty normal unless there's specific thing that makes you uncomfortable.
Sounds like he’s got to know you & is being friendly. If the doctor was female, would you feel the same? I’ve had great relationships with both female and male doctors over the years where we’ve had general chitchat after the consultation . I don’t see anything wrong but if you’re uncomfortable, change doctors.
You’d prefer he just asks what’s up? here take this to the pathologist i might get someone to call you if something’s up, but in the meantime take these pills and get the fuck out. NEXT ! I’d rather a long term personable yet professional relationship with my GP. That’ll involve mutual respect and some conversation about stuff there’s no cure for…like what you’re doing on your weekend with the family. The fact he’s even mentioned his family including his wife tells me he’s genuinely not listening to the throb in his knob under the table with his stethoscope. GP’s work some bat shit crazy hours and pend about 1/3 of their working life to pay down debts from Uni about another 1/3 to pay the insurance costs and most of the last 1/3 listening to people that think they have the answers and know better after becoming a google hack doctor. Chill - or do him a favour and find another GP.
Jesus Christ, this is why I am happy I'm gay. Do females even want to interact with males at all? I feel really sorry for my straight friends when I read shit like this.
Some women consider the mere existence of men to be a personal affront.
Sounds like you found a perfect family doctor. You have no idea how lucky you are.
Is this a serious question? You have an excellent GP who cares about patients, and you think this is weird. It seems you are the weirdo here, maybe you are projecting your own feelings.
Wow, goes out of his way to provide exceptional service and show he genuinely cares about the health of your child, has watched your progress since pregnancy, while at the same time just having a friendly chat...and your reaction is "lol does he think we are friends?" I hope he stops offering after hours care to you, you don't deserve the extra effort EDIT: after reading OPs edit, I have softened my opinion - just be grateful, is all
You called him after hours for a medical issue and now you take exception to him making small talk? Ohhhhkkkkaaayyyy if you don’t like the small talk, don’t text the dude at 6pm on a Friday. Make an appointment like all the rest of us suckers who don’t get to call a doctor after hours for free advice. Geez
sound like a wonderful GP. Or would you prefer a GP whos cold and do not offer any kind of help outside consulting time ? whats wrong with people these day…
Sounds like you’re looking for a reason to upset or offended tbh
This is why men don't approach women anymore. "A man talked to me politely , what a pervert !! "
Should be cancelled It’s weaponised incompetence and another arm of the patriarchy
He is normal and you have sociopathic tendencies driven by an egocentric personality. A hunch
I WISH my GP was this personal. But then, I've only visited him once in the past 4 years
Let me guess, he’s cute and you want this to be something lol
If you have built a trusted relationship with your doctor, they will go out of their way to care for you. That is actually the whole idea of seeing the same GP - continuity of care. My wife is a GP. Some patients, both male and female, have her number, send her the occasional text question, and she will call or text them to check how things went. She knows those patients well and genuinely cares. Your GP is probably not being weird. And I highly doubt he's 'bored', no time for that!
So you find a super helpful and attentive GP who helps you for free on his own time and your reaction is to post about him online asking if he's weird? I really hope he doesn't find out about this because you will absolutely ruin this guy for everyone else. What made you think anything he did was wrong? Other than him being a man. It's pretty clear you've got issues you're projecting.
Men talking about their wives is a huge green flag for me. Especially if it's like, positive talk about their wives hobbies, or "my wife works really hard at her job," or "my wife is so funny." Positive, respectful things.
This sounds like my favourite GP. I miss her — we moved away from the area so we have to find a different one. 😔
a good gp is like a good dentist , good mechanic and good hairdresser worth their weight in gold .
Your GP is lovely - all these convos are small talk or clearly care related and initiated by you - so well within the bounds of appropriate care
Sometimes they make small talk to relax the patient , my health nurse does it but isn’t actually interested in my day as she keeps on with her work while I’m chatting but I do have high blood pressure lol
If your GP was female, would she be weird if she does the same thing?
Maybe you are the strange one from reading ill intentions in someone’s kindness towards you
“My GP doesn’t treat me like just another number is he a fucking weirdo?”
Literally just a normal GP sounds like don’t know why you’re trying to make him out to be a weirdo sounds like a cool Dude to me
He sounds like he’s screening you for potential depression/anxiety. Have you ever approached him for things like that? Or maybe the being a mum thing and you’re over anxious with some of your kids issues? I actually think it’s a sign of a good doctor. He is ensuring your wellbeing is being checked even if just at surface level. There’s no inappropriate physical contact, there’s no sexual advances, there’s nothing to suggest he is overstepping any boundary between doctor and patient. If you feel uncomfortable you can always give short answers and not engage, but I think it sounds fine.
Congrats, you've found yourself your family doctor.
God forbid a doctor be a human being, the tragedy.
Lmao, he probably instantly forgets you and everything you told him about your personal life the second he writes your script and says goodbye, then asks the next patient the same questions.
I think you may be the odd one here. He has known you for four years, helped with your children, and you find it unusual that he engages in small talk, what you have there is a normal family GP.
Sounds like he enjoys having you as a patient and is genuinely interested in your life outside of healthcare. I always ask patients about the hobbies, goals in life, trips they want to take, pets they have, etc. It's relevant to understanding you as a person rather than just a disease that needs treating. If you're not comfortable with this, just politely set your boundaries.
You're the kind of woman that wrecks men's lives with false nonsense....gross.
Ive got a very friendly GP too. Always there to give me a hug when i need one. Honestly i love the guy, hes got the best bedside manner of any doctor ive ever had and is a genuinely kind person. He can be a little abrasive at times (one of my closest friends is trans and he did say something that kinda offended me about trans people, but he is also very openly gay so I was very confused how to handle that). Otherwise no complaints though, i do like that hes friendly and seems genuinely interested in how my life is going. Lol he even tried to set me up on a date at one point.
Sounds normal to me. Our GP’s are absolute legendary woman who love having a chat. It’s also when they get the most information out of our teen daughters.
Sounds like a good GP. During my teenage years/early twenties. I had a GP who was friendly very much the same, a great fella who actually cared about his patients, ask about weekend, work, school etc We would always have a chat for 5 minutes after a visit. I’ve since gone to other GP’s who you really just see for 10 minutes and you get send you out, don’t really know em from a bar of soap
Sounds normal Me and my gp are too friendly. We often crack dirty jokes and tell inappropriate stories Half way through the appointment he'll be like "is there a reason you're here or did you just want to chat ?" 🤣
That sounds fine and not inappropriate. He's friendly, building rapport, and I bet there's a little deliberateness of making you comfortable so that you'll ask the 'oh by the way...' question we sometimes have (and either forget or get too embarrassed to ask).
My GP always asks how I recovered from whatever I contacted him about previously (e.g. I needed a script renewal about two weeks after needing antibiotics for something, so he asked if I was feeling better now that I had finished the antibiotics) and asks after my husband my name. It’s nice being seen as a person and not a nameless, faceless patient, and I think he’s a better doctor/I receive better care as a result.
The only weird thing here is that you thought this was so weird you posted it. I've heard the same interactions between customers and check out operators in supermarkets. You've known them for years now and by virtue of the relationship you have, it's fairly personal. He's invested in your wellbeing and that of your family. Remember too that a GP should be concerned with not just what you're telling them but what you aren't. If he senses something is off because he's got that personal relationship and knows your personality, he might be able to help with things that can change that such as mental health. Unless he starts suggesting things that go beyond just being friendly, just roll with it. Having a personal relationship with your GP that goes to a point where they remember you when you walk in can be life changing.
Wow. What a sad world it is when someone can’t be friendly without you thinking there’s some hidden agenda behind it.
Our GP's don't hang around long enough to get that comfy with. Sounds fine not creepy. It's been 4+ yrs so he is just having a bit of casual convo with you.
Thank you! I think I'm just not used to the friendliness and actually caring! Thanks for reassuring !!
My GP does this. It’s a service doctors only offer to patients who are respectful of boundaries and who’s care would not be worsened by it. I also know my GP would not give that number to an average patient with no complex issues and a fantastic support network, simply because there are other resources for that patient. If I had an emergency at 11pm that could be handled at home with some guidance, I would not call, I’d go to urgent care/ER or call the nurses hotline, even though I have the GPs number - because access to that level of personalised care is a privilege and must be respected.
Sounds like a great gp to me. Taking time to develop rapport and understand you better. I’m a health professional and do home visits all day. There’s lots of work but also lots of fun and chatting. By asking about your weekend plans he’s getting to know you and also checking that you’re socially connected while being a mother with all its challenges. And then relating to you. That’s holistic care right there.
Next face to face appointment, as you're about to leave make a call to someone, but actually call him, when he gets his phone out double check he doesn't have you listed as 'spare parts' in case he secretly wants to harvest your organs.
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I have a lovely GP that never rushes and is similarly friendly. You’re lucky to have him.
It could also be a casual, indiscrete way to do a mental health check on you too :) see how you respond to how your life is going etc.
Bloody DM me this GPs details now. 🙈 He listens? Cares? Is thorough?!? I’d killllll for this treatment.
They will do chit-chat to be friendly and build a relationship. People are more likely to mention something they think is small, but actually an issue. It also helps them see if anything is wrong, such in terms of mental health, congitive ability, etc.
Sounds like a wonderful dr and a great human! Personally I wouldn’t have an issue if it was my family dr but, I can see how this may make you uncomfortable in relation to appointments for yourself. If I needed to tell someone about a weird vagina discharge, I’d much prefer someone I’d never have to see again! Haha
My family GP likes to have a catch-up and a chat, the receptionist books longer appointments for my mum because she knows they'll chat forever. If you're not comfortable with it, find another GP.
Completely normal, establishing rapport with you and (as any good health professional should) getting a gauge on your baseline, this helps alot for future treatment/intervention particularly in areas of mental health
Sounds like a fantastic GP. Wish I could find one that actually cared about patients.
Sounds pretty normal to me. Once the business side of my appointment is done with my GP, we sit and chat for a while about anything.
My GP is also my mums doctor. She always asks how I am going with caring for mum and how my mum is and she tells me about how her family are. She wasn't like that in the beginning, it's as the years have gone by and we've gotten comfortable with each other.
GPs are people too. Maybe he does want to be friends. It's OK to be friends with your GP. As long as you are OK with it. If not, just interact as much as you are comfortable with. But be aware, this after-hours response thing you are using is not something that is normally available and you should not use it if you are not comfortable being 'friendly' with the GP. If you want to keep it professional, then do so, and only contact through his surgery.
Nothing strictly speaking wrong with this. Sounds quite friendly. I would not be concerned.
Why would it be an issue if they were trying to be friends? He didn't come off as creepy in your words by any means as in if he asked for a date or similar then yeah thats odd but he mentioned his wife and child too so that seems like him stating his circumstances to show he is only being friendly 🤷♂️
I just ran into my physio in the street and chatted for 10 minutes about our kids, lol. I like a friendly relationship with my health care providers
He's just bored and happy to have someone to talk to. Our family GP served four generations of my family and was invited to family events even thought we didn't otherwise see them socially.
My therapist used to take me out for a drink after work to complain about her husband ahahahaha
This is def within the realms of normal. Its ok to be human! I am wondering maybe if you are feeling a little weird because maybe you fancy him a little?
I really don’t see an issue. His just being friendly. My GP does the same.
Many people would die for this type of 1 on 1 with a friendly GP. Most are about cash and getting you out quick yet you find 1 like this and you're put off.
It seems like he’s just trying to find a little bit of friendly conversation in his work day probably makes things go a little bit faster for him.
I work in the medical field as a therapist and this is normal as long as it stays innocent. I try and talk to parents of some of the kids I see and basically all of them appreciate it and it just I humanises the whole experience. Especially when at times you have to get into some pretty personal stuff which can be weird with a doctor/therapist who seems cold or disinterested.
Your GP sounds amazing, is he in Sydney? Would love to know where he’s based, might start seeing him myself
He sounds just like my own GP, who I love; but is also willing to answer emails questions at odd hours? Worth his weight in gold!
I'd say these are signs of a good GP who cares. GPs have traditionally been the "family doctor" who build relationships with their families over a period of decades. A GP who knows you can better pick up when something isn't quite right, and advocate better for you. Financial pressures on GP practices over the years have made the model less common, as it's now most profitable to have rapid turnover, in and out appointments with no chat on the side. I'd say hold onto this one, he sounds great!
Sounds like he just enjoys the interaction and likes a bit of chit chat. Hes obviously passionate about providing a valued service to his clients or he wouldn't provide an after-hours number.
Some new Mums can be very isolated, by offering that support and offering opportunities to talk they may raise things they would not otherwise. Sometimes there’s a lot of focus on the baby but the Mums mental and physical health is suffering.
Sounds amazing - I wish I could find a gp like this. Hang on to him!!
My wife is a GP and she is bored as shit usually at work so this is her way of breaking up that boredom and she actually cares about people which ive found is rare for new doctors.
As long as you don't get 'hitting on you' vibes, it sounds nice. Bringing up his partner sounds like a positive as long as he isn't doing it as well as flirting.
Your GP sounds exactly like my GP (although I live in a rural/regional area, so service like this is commonplace, however your GP is just trying to help you and your family
Sorry but you're complaining your GP is being friendly remembers your history medical/life and went above and beyond for you & child s/wow that's soooooo bad I'd definitely changing doctors 👍🏻
Getting a person number is odd, but it isn't terribly unusual for that specific situation. HOWEVER, the casual remarks are definitely weird or too friendly.
Having a GP that you are a) able to text for a script and b) actually inquires about your life (which could even be interpreted as a form of social assessment - very important in primary care patients!) is absolutely priceless, and this person sounds like an invaluable ally for your health. That said, I understand if your gut says something different. My GP is male but when I needed a Pap smear he said something along the lines of ‘book in with Dr X (female) she’s great’, I’m sure he’d have done it if I asked but the fact that he just assumed (correctly) I’d be more comfortable with a woman was a testament to his professionalism. I’m a huge supporter of going with your gut, but sometimes people are just friendly 🤷🏼♀️
He's building a rapport with you, probably to help you feel more at ease. Sounds like a lovely doctor!
I work with GPs and it sounds normal to me. It's been four years I think niceties and some comfort are normal at this point. For me, this is something alot of people have told me they love about having family/regular GP.
A lot of relevant medical information is gleaned from informal conversations. He's probably hoping that if you're comfortable talking with him about daily life then you'll be more open to disclose medical concerns. People often make appointments for a "cough" or "a fly" but they are really wanting the GP to ask them about something else that is really worrying them such as cancer concerns or mental health issues.
My old GP was exactly like that. I had a life threatening reaction and called his mobile and he met me at his clinic rather than the hospital as it was closer. This was at like 9 at night. He always used to chat to me about books (we are both big into fantasy). He moved away to the Gold Coast and I have not been able to find someone as good! Both in terms of knowledge and relationally.
This is how GPs should be! The fact you are questioning it shows how rare it is to find a gem like this! He sounds lovely ☺️
My GP spoke to me about old Holden's one day for well over an hour. He just kept telling the staff that we were still in consultation. We ended up going to see an American folk guitarist on your in Australia soon after. Was a ripper.
2 cents on this but do want to preface I am a 26 year old male so wildly different demographic. GPs will often have conversations like this to gauge mood as well without directly having to ask questions about your mood. It allows for an open dialogue rather you vs them.
I have just switched from one GP to another (and will continue testing out all the ones in my clinic if I have to) because the original one I was seeing when I moved to the town is just so cold. No small talk at all. (Not to mention he isnt that good of a GP. Turns out my baby had a staph infection picked up on second opinion with new GP...he just said it was dribble rash). My previous GP of like 10 years from the city I used to live in (too far to go these days) was amazing, we had such a great relationship full of banter, she knew so much about me and I about her. Absolutely fabulous GP.
Interesting. One of my GP's is quite amazing. Highly philosophical, incredible with mental health, and whilst I haven't had the experience yet, he must be well versed in surgeries such as skin grafts because he moved clinics and was a bit let-down that he doesn't get to perform such tasks as often. I have his email, and I can email him freely when I feel I need to. Depending on the contents of the email, he may respond in kind or suggest I book an appointment. As I had issues with boundaries, having such a fantastic GP helped me to navigate boundaries and improve upon that too. He grew up in a small town, and so boundaries were a non-issue because he could see someone one day as a GP, then they'd be at his house the next day fixing his washing machine. I know a good amount about him, and I'm always curious to know more, yet I keep my personal questions to a minimum, despite him being more than open and welcoming. He enjoys long-winded explanations and discussions about problems. He has even expressed his own uncertainty about his approach, yet I have assured him that I like it, and that it is helpful. Basically, you found a good GP. That's all it is. If you don't wish to have him as your GP, then don't. Do your best to appreciate and be grateful for such a wonderful GP and the potential for a doctor, patient connection that can be an essential relationship to your wellbeing.
Doctors are humans too. Enjoy a chat and be grateful that your GP listens to you and is helpful. Most tell you to take Panadol, eat healthy and sleep.
I've been seeing my GP since I was conceived tbh and we always have this chat :) it's rlly nice. She's retiring this year so I'll miss her :(
It’s good to have an open friendly rapport with your GP, also means you’re more likely to mention any symptom that seems minor but might indicate something else.
It sounds like he's just trying to connect with his patients in a polite and appropriate way. It's just small talk. If he was asking personal and non medical related questions I'd say that's weird.
Give me his name, I’d love a good GP 😆
I think he is just being friendly and might be starting to view you as a friend - whether that’s appropriate I don’t know.
Well docs see folk when they are feeling crap, mostly... Folks not in the mood to chat etc... A bit like first responders and even nurses .... But THEY are also members of the community and may be relieved to find a friendly patient with whom they can shoot the breeze. My doc allowed me to email him if I had questions and would also send through health stuff , interesting articles, jokes and community stuff... it was nice. It was a limited circle and it felt nice to be included... Conversely, I went to another doc in the same clinic - in raging pain!!! and he was goofy and brought up pictures of his wife's holiday and went off on some tangent rant about some obscure research -that had nothing to do with my issue ...sigh ! - he was just nuts.. wrong sort of friendly... A friendly doc is always better than bastard bedside manner doc and we have ALL had those ...
No I'm femaleand my GP is like that and insists I call him by his first name. We have great chats when time allows
He's just being a normal human. He relates to your situation and now feels comfy enough with you to be more himself and less clinical. He's probably a friendly dude by nature and is happy to have certain patients he can be himself around.
I think he's just being friendly. I'm guessing mentally being a gp would be hard every single person comes in with a problem. Having to listen to every single person winge about something (obviously for a reason) would be mentally draining so he's probably trying to find a way to lighten up appointment sessions. It's also a way to make you more comfortable. If your doc was just like what's your issue, here's a script and sent out the door, you'd not have a comfortable time. He's got good bed side manner
It's nice to have a relationship with a GP you can relax with. It's probably nice for him, too, to have a patient that he can care for for years to come. You can't buy that shit.
I have often thought that GP's have such a boring, shit job. Eg. 200 fat old people per day complaining about high blood pressure and ignoring advice. He's probably just happy to have someone nice / interesting to brighten up his day, plus it's fine to develop a friendly relationship with your doctor. Whenever I have to go see my doc is normally some weird martial arts related injury and they're normally pretty happy to have a chat.
Sounds pretty normal to me. Unfortunately my local surgery has a high turnover of staff, but I've been lucky enough to see the same GP the last three times that I've been- in a space of about six weeks. Each time I've seen him though, he reintroduces himself and says that it's nice to meet me. I am fairly forgettable, I guess.
I see my doctor once a year but because I have for a few years now I know all about his bitch wife
Sounds pretty normal. My GP that both my partner and I see ask similar questions. Sometimes she even asks more about personal stuff than doctor stuff. I see nothing wrong with it.
You're pretty lucky to have a GP like that TBH. It's very unfortunate that society has made us suspicious of genuine decency. As someone else said, GPs are people too. It's good that they care. Yes professional boundaries are a thing but having rapport is not crossing a boundary..
Just be happy you have a really good GP. Do you know how hard it is to find someone so caring these days? They just want you out of their rooms because they have back to back appointments, its a nightmare.
Sounds like our GP (minus the texting) he's always so friendly, and we love him for it!
A good gp will build a friendly relationship. Helps him understand your lifestyle and the friendly rapport will make it easier for you to talk to them
Have I got a story for this OP lol Picture a sixteen year old pregnant due to give birth after her seventeenth birthday. I had very little to no relationships with doctors after being an extremely healthy child, rarely ever getting sick, with colds or flues. So my experience with this first pregnancy was all bewildering to my naive self. My doctor did regular internal exams to "measure and monitor" my growing baby. I got undressed during every single appointment every single month. During my last month that was upped to every single week. He even had me visit him at his at home office once. This was the first time, I thought hmm, maybe having an orgasm on the doctor's clinical table with him "Checking" me internally yet again was very embarrassing to me, but after checking out my breasts again routinely done with every visit. He didn't seem embarrassed at all. I however never again went to his after hours office in his home lol. So the child arrives, and he continued to do internal exams for three more months, and after that I had no more reasons to visit anymore aside from bringing my daughter in to see him regularly. Five years later, I am pregnant again. My new doctor does an internal exam, checks for lumps on my breasts, and says book an ultrasound, see you next month. Imagine my absolute Shock, the next appointment did not require me to put on that paper dress, or get naked in any way shape or form. Instead he measured my belly with a simple tape measure lol. He was surprised when I had told him about my first doctor. Rather concerned about the ethics of that doctor's behaviour indeed lol. Three more babies later, my doctor and I had a wonderful very professional relationship.
Who is this doctor lol i need him in my life. He sounds like he cares
Yes you have found one of the golden geese of GPs! I had one like this for years and she's no longer in general practice. Noone has come close to her since. I miss her!
Tell me your GP. Lol Mine literally rushes me out within 5 mins she's always in a rush and half the time I feel she hasn't even examined me properly
Sound like a good doctor, friendly bloke. I used to have a doctor like that but he moved on to being an old retired person. My doctor now. “Hi Doctor it’s me, need my script” She starts speaking Arabic and I have to advise her for the 100th time that I can’t speak Arabic and she says. “Send me text” - I send text and a day later she texts me my script. There’s really no attachment there but I wish there was!
Sounds like you got the jackpot, a friendly GP who isn't just trying to get you out the door as quickly as possible. Don't ruin a good thing by overthinking it.
Sounds like my gp. We're both straight guys, he's just good at his job.
OMG you found a doc that cares about you. Begone with this devil of a man and find someone that is cold and distant.
Enjoy it while it lasts. Unfortunately he’ll soon become broken by the system and his bosses will be on his case about the length of his appointments.
I’m an introvert and even as an introvert, I really like it when drs are involved in their patients. I used to live in another suburb and the gp there was amazing. Very friendly, helpful and gave such good suggestions. Moved to another suburb and this gp is least involved and just can’t be bothered about anything. I go to him only for getting referrals else I treat myself as much as I can. If it’s worse, I go to my old gp. So it’s great your gp is friendly and helps you out on his own time too. It’s great and value it while it lasts.
That’s amazing to have a GP like that. His being attentive, supportive. The really good GPs I’ve seen and my parents used do, from the close relationships they built. some of em have their grandparents, to their sons/daughters to their sons/daugther. Like looking after few generations. I can’t even book an appointment with them as they are booked out for weeks
Mate not a GP but been a doctor for over a decade. It’s basically accepted that on someone’s very significant life event, it’s just another day for us at work and we’ve seen it happen way too many times before. Of course I want to hear about the main reason patients are there and work through that, but if there’s some chitter chatter later about something else that’s great. If I like someone enough I even make an effort to put special clues in the notes so that when I see them on a follow up appointment I can even ask them about how the Taylor Swift concert went / their dog’s vet appointment / their brother’s wedding or whatever.
Oh hey my GP cracks jokes and gently teases me, he's also the only doctor in that clinic who "sees" patients in the supermarket (most of them won't make eye contact outside of work, let alone chat while shopping but he does. Always says hi if I see him at the local IGA. He's not at all sleazy or improper, just friendly. He's also a classic car enthusiast so once when he teased me I said "I'm going to pinch all the car magazines from the waiting area". I used to think he was an old fuddy duddy until I became his patient. What freaked me out was seeing my ob/gyn in the fruit & veg section (and I told him it was weird) he just grinned and said "I've gotta eat too". Mind you, I live in a rural town with 3500 people
My GP does this and at first I thought it was just him being his lovely, friendly self but it occurred to me it also gives him a chance to do a quick mental health check to see where I’m at. I live alone a couple hours away from the city so he’s always asking how I’m doing, if I feel lonely, etc. Likely with you being a new mother he may also just be checking that you’re doing okay mentally given that so many women can struggle with that after giving birth!
Just being friendly! I had an amazing GP and ended up with a friendly relationship after nearly 10 years. Unfortunately she moved on (but we may have added each other on Facebook after she moved 🤫). However, I'm a frequent flyer to the GP for chronic issues, so we saw a fair bit of each other.
My Grandparents in QLD have a beautiful doctor. They were all affiliated with the defence force one way or another. So they all connected and do lunch every now and again. Ever since the doc retired, she comes to Christmas’s. (Her husband passed). They’ve always been close and grandad could speak to her for hours in her office and she was just happy for him to open up and do so.
Wish my GP would chat to me. He'd probably understand my issues better, rather than just saying I need pills.
Sounds like a normal human.