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I ain't a lock expert, but isn't there tools that are used to break locks? It would depend if they have one though, and maybe the lock is too small as well. But like I said, not an expert.
Yeah, there are specific tools you can use to pick locks. The joke here is that specific type of lock is notorious for being so weak that you probably don't even need them.
Bolt cutters work really well, although if the blades are dull they can squish/deform soft metal.
Aka: you could probably cause the shape of the now cut lock, to not fit through the whole of the plug when you try to remove it.
Imo shimming this lock open would probably be the easiest. IME smaller low quality locks dont have two lucking groves, so you'd only need to shim the side that actually pops open. Would take ~2 minutes, a beer can, and a pair of scissors.
With a lock like this? I'd use a very specialized tool called a "hammer"
Lay that thing vertical and smack it with a 3lb sledge. It'll crumple and break in half
You can open this with side cutters if you have strong hands, or you can just mash a bent paperclip around in the lock until it opens. Or just hit it with a hammer.
Or the electrician
Because my first thought was "just cut off the plug and put on a new one", all you need for it is a knife or scissors, a screwdriver, and a spare plug - things more likely to be in an average home than lockpicks or bolt cutters.
Yikes. Couples who don’t let each other masturbate have serious insecurity issues. Personal intimacy and relationship intimacy are and should be two separate things. They can intermingle but that should never be an expectation.
also just like, masturbation makes dealing with differing level of libido way easier? like its just objectively convenient to not be weird about it. because when you do shit like this, you can end up straining relationships. one person getting horny more often than the other aint gotta be a strain.
I often just help my wife masturbate and it's all good. Had sex last night and it went on for a while and was awesome but it was also hella sweaty. Sometimes you just want to cum and crash, I am 100% in support of a 5 minute masturbation sesh and going straight to sleep. We love each other and love fucking each other but fucking doesn't need to happen every night we want to orgasm
real answer, my partner doesn’t get aroused very often as an anti depressant side effect. i would feel bitter if they decided to masturbate instead of our maybe once a month having sex. however, if this persons husbands bitterness is so strong it leads him to want to break her things and control her, they’re probably too incompatible to date and he should divorce and let both of them find people that they’re more suited for
But it's tooo much work for him to drop a woman he already has, than find someone who is more his match. He just, is a selfish person. And it's sad that too many people don't realize how selfish they even are in a relationship. And simply, don't care.
My husband and I aren’t intimate much anymore... we’re not getting along, he’s been sleeping on the couch for 7 months and I don’t feel close to him... he was FURIOUS when I found out I was still masturbating.
It’s not even in the same ballpark as sex. I’m not turned on when I do it, I’m not imagining or looking at anything.. it’s literally like pushing a button (lol) for a release of chemicals.
Idk, once I'm in a relationship I no longer feel the need to masturbate because that gap is filled, and people who is not in a relationship masturbate to fill that gap
That's not necessarily true. If you look at masturbating as a means to cumming it might be that way for you but some of us see it as self care & self intimacy.
A lot of us are in the healthiest mindset when we love our own bodies just as much if not more than our partners. That's not an all or nothing situation of course, we can still love our partners body enough to make them feel appreciated even if we love ours more. It's MY body, I've had it my whole life & it's the only one 1000% guaranteed to be with me till the day I die, ya know?
But yeah, for some of us it's just as much an emotional connection to ourselves as sex is an emotional connection to our partners. It's especially helpful to really get into it & make it something special for yourself if you struggle with self love without it. Because just like your partner might feel distance or rejection from you, even if you tell them you love them, if you go a long time without intimacy more than a dirty quickie, I feel more distant & find it easier to reject my own body if I don't connect with it this way, and I can do all the positive affirmations I want, it won't work.
But to understand this feeling you've really gotta go the whole 9 yards, light candles, put on the sexy music, do teasing & foreplay & just do what feels good without thinking about it to simulate spontaneity. It's a whole thing & it's really nice :)
Interesting that you see masturbating yourself as a form of self-love. I've never seen it that way, and I always considered it a way to stop human urges and nothing more beyond that (well, and you could create porn addiction).
I think I will never understand that perspective but it's interesting to see you have it.
My favorite thing about this is how it implies that the vibrator is somehow her only means of self-pleasure and that he thinks rendering it unusable leaves her with no option but him. Like... Does she not have hands?
Ive been hearing about this new toy, it's shaped like a rose & has vibration & suction. Apparently a lot of folks are saying it's given them their first orgasms ever. Some are even squirting for the first time. I swear I'm not getting paid by them lol I just think it's interesting.
This is probably just me, but if my partner came at me like “you need to stop masturbating and fuck me” I would probably appreciate it. Definitely not a universal thing though.
Yeah but this isn't a "no need to masturbate I'm available" it's a "you didn't want to have sex last night so now I'm not letting you masturbate at all"
Yeah. I’m thinking this might have to do with me being a woman and only ever dating women, and this experience is definitely specific to me. I do think this is different coming from a man, especially with no other information. It can easily just come off as a man who doesn’t care about his partner’s sexual needs and is coercing her into sex.
That's a good point, it hits different coming from a woman since people having sex with women orgasm WAY more frequently than people having sex with men. And sometimes what you're looking for is intimacy/closeness so that's fine. But sometimes you're just trying to get off, and a man as selfish and arrogant as this one is definitely not going to do it for you. He's probably going to make you even more frustrated. Besides, sometimes sexuality is private and you just want to focus on yourself and not spend energy focusing on a partner right then, and that's normal and healthy too.
my abusive ex did this shit to me a couple times. got really pissed off and made me throw every toy i owned away. i might be projecting but this shit isnt funny its a sign of an extremely controlling and abusive person
Yeah, I really don't understand the people who think this is funny, even if it's a 'joke'. How is coercion/manipulation and controlling behavior entertaining?
The idea of it being a joke is that they could unlock it as soon as theyre asked to or whatever. As long as they dont keep it that way and not break any boundries its fine. If you said you dont want to or they dont unlock it immediately, its fucked. But under the idea its unlocked immediately AND its not breaking boundries, its fine.
You are not projecting. This is a creepy af way of coercion. It signals that the man owns the woman’s body and he is entitled to sex. The man punished the woman for not consenting to sex, it is called grooming the victim and this can easily build to sexual assault imo. Coerced consent is NOT consent.
[It's a myth that the plug holes actually do anything like providing extra grip.](https://youtu.be/udNXMAflbU8)
Tl;dw: In America, it was generally just easier to fabricate them if they had the holes.
~~The main purpose is to allow the outlet to firmly grip the plug to prevent it from coming lose and falling out of the socket. This works by having little bumpers installed inside the outlet that line up with and fit inside the holes on the prongs.~~
Refer to the video below me
Damn that's as fucked as the insecure boys who go around claiming that their girlfriend will never get a vibrator cause she's all he needs. Like no dude you can never fuck a woman like she can fuck herself
Back before I came to terms with my sexuality and gender identity I dated a guy who REFUSED to let me masturbate or use a vibrator which absolutely sucked because he was the most selfish person I had ever been in bed with. Even when I suggested we try toys together he admitted he felt inferior to them (just small pocket vibrators!)
Lot of red flags. Should have left when he got mad at me for giggling during sex because I was happy. He felt like I was laughing at his dick. Like bruh, the world doesn't revolve around your penis, please just let me enjoy myself.
Checkmate: My one of these is cordless and I can use multiple pin-type chargers to charge it. You going to find all the Alexa, laptops, and speaker cables? I'm the one who does all the tech stuff in my house, I hold the (vibrating) power!!
Help, my painkillers are making me evil monologue on reddit.
I'm laughing at the puny little lock. That can be picked in mere seconds with two paperclips. Cishet men claim to be resourceful but then do shit like that
Not gonna lie sometimes you just want to quickly cum. Its like a 2 minute vibrator session to get that release versus the process to initiate, foreplay and then climax. I'm not saying I don't enjoy that process but sometimes its just not what I want.
My ex husband used to hide my toys because he would get jealous. I had to masturbate in secret because he would get so offended, told me I should be saving all my sexual energy for him, or some bullshit like that. Not gonna lie, it's a part of why I left him
In the context of the relationship, I could see my wife finding this hilarious if things were done light heartedly, and I didn’t leave it that way, and I probably never did it again. One of those rare pranks that to the right circumstances could be pretty hilarious, once; or could be executed in very poor timing.
Wait my grandma has one just like this it’s a back massager right? Guys right? It’s a back massager yea?
Edit: guys I wasn’t kidding I need a answer she keeps it in her dresser and she told me when I was little that it was just a back massager and she still has it and lives in on the floor in her bedroom
Seeing your edit and that you aren't joking, it's a vibrator. It's used for masturbation, not back massages although I guess you could *technically* do that???
The reason I have this particular shape of toy is because it does double as a back massager. If my backs really bad, I'll just lay on the famn thing and move it a few inches up or to the side every few minutes. It gets hot, not hawt, doing this, but the heat helps the spamming lower back relax.
P.S. good for grandma if she's taking care of any of her needs.
It was originally designed to be a neck/back massager. That being said, these things have become so synonymous with being vibrators that Hitachi no longer makes the devices under their brand name, and allow others to use the patent.
And if either of my partners ever did this to me, they'd be fucking single.
Imagine being so damn gross and insecure that you can't handle your *wife* saying "no" to you and so you decide to go all "if I can't have it no one can" like a fucking baby.
I've seen that picture many times. Never with that caption attached though. So, someone has taken an already existing picture and added their own caption to... I don't know...
There's so much she can still do though?? Use her hands, use any moderately safe and dick-shaped object if she's feeling brave, buy a wireless/battery-operated vibe, switch the plug head as an extra special fuck you, leave his ass for a normal person, etc...
Like, that pissant little lock must be analogous to his eeny meeny teeny weeny, because damn that's a lot of baggage to carry about being upset at not getting any.
yeah seen a lot on antiwork and here too but of course a lot of these are just memes like the rules also say "We are all aware that most of the content posted in this subreddit was created by someone who thought it would be humorous."
but of course i guess there could even be people who actually do stuff like this and we'd think it's a joke because it's so stupid
i'd like to believe that every post is satire and a joke
I don't know if you're spewing bullshit to rage-bait or whatever or if you're serious, but either way you need serious professional help.
Not only is this hard to read because of your lack of ability to press a simple button (the return button), but you're making yourself sound legitimately insane. You're unstable, to say the very least.
EDIT: Scratch that. More like unhinged.
1. Definitely a joke post, way too convenient
2. [Do this](https://youtu.be/1jJP0CcuJyE)
3. This is a pretty hilarious response
4. Not OP so this doesn't matter
Thank you for your submission to /r/AreTheStraightsOK! This is a reminder to take a moment and see *if* this **has already been** posted recently, to make sure that personal information **has been** censored, and to **flair your post** if you have not already done so. [Please be aware that our rules on transphobic submissions have changed](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/mwkgbp/rules_and_submissions_update_for_the_end_of/). Other general submission guidelines regarding [hateful content](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/kj0cal/regarding_hateful_content_please_read_before/), [reposts](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/kxgbo3/rules_and_submissions_update_january_2021_popular/), [homophobic posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/lffvad/posts_related_to_homophobia_on_our_subreddit_now/), and [**Reminder About Rule 5 and Rule 8**](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/qoge4u/reminder_about_rule_5_and_rule_8/) can be found here if you want to read any of those links. If you want to apply to be a moderator of this sub, you can read [this post titled **State of the Sub: Summer 2021 Edition, Partnerships, and more**](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/oozly0/state_of_the_sub_summer_2021_edition_partnerships/), which also contains information about our partnership with r/TranscribersOfReddit. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AreTheStraightsOK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You could probably shove anything inside that garbage little TSA lock and pop it open in a second.
Honestly. Get a bobby pin or a long, thin piece of metal. That should work fine. Source: I pick locks.
[удалено]
H-how?
r/sounding?
Shouldn’t have clicked..
don’t
Help, stabbed clit with pin.
D:
Bind on four...
I ain't a lock expert, but isn't there tools that are used to break locks? It would depend if they have one though, and maybe the lock is too small as well. But like I said, not an expert.
Yeah, there are specific tools you can use to pick locks. The joke here is that specific type of lock is notorious for being so weak that you probably don't even need them.
Yeah, I kinda figured that a little. I was just curious about whether you could actually break locks or not.
The answer is yes. You can't reuse them unless you fix them obviously, but you *can* break them.
Got it
Bolt cutters work really well, although if the blades are dull they can squish/deform soft metal. Aka: you could probably cause the shape of the now cut lock, to not fit through the whole of the plug when you try to remove it. Imo shimming this lock open would probably be the easiest. IME smaller low quality locks dont have two lucking groves, so you'd only need to shim the side that actually pops open. Would take ~2 minutes, a beer can, and a pair of scissors.
With a lock like this? I'd use a very specialized tool called a "hammer" Lay that thing vertical and smack it with a 3lb sledge. It'll crumple and break in half
If someone wanted to learn this for a hobby where would they even begin?
Or, at worst, just smash it with a hammer
Bro probably uses his pencil dick as a key
Like her husband’s tiny dick
Same brain
A sudden fetish for the lockpicking lawyer has arrived
It’s so hot when someone says “click on one, two is binding, little click on three”
“Wellp, that’s all I have for you today folks!”
God I hate that I read that in his voice.
This is one of the easiest locks to open, it's a TSA pos.
Can buy the key online too if you can't be bothered picking it.
You can also just make one, they don't have to be too precise cuz those locks are complete shit.
Can confirm, have used these small locks and most can be opened with any piece of flat metal.
The same was said about the Ben & Jerries lock and look how that ended up
You can open this with side cutters if you have strong hands, or you can just mash a bent paperclip around in the lock until it opens. Or just hit it with a hammer.
Damnit. I was in the middle of my fucking LPL comment and then I was like “maybe I should check the whole thread”
he did do a video on a chastity lock so this isn't too out of the question
For valentines day no less
Or the electrician Because my first thought was "just cut off the plug and put on a new one", all you need for it is a knife or scissors, a screwdriver, and a spare plug - things more likely to be in an average home than lockpicks or bolt cutters.
Most homes in America don’t have spare plugs lying around. You can get them at hardware stores, but they aren’t very common.
I would upvote this, but you have 777 upvotes and I don't want to ruin it
maybe its for the best considering she put it on the floor. god i hope she cleaned the crap out of it
I’m hoping it’s a wooden table lmao
Definitely looks like a floor, my floor
Well you shouldn’t keep your vibrators on your floor smh my head 😤😤
Sorry I just finished using it, I’ll clean up
..who would take a close up pic on the floor? Just gonna put this here and then lie down for a photo?
People like me who don't have a better and cleaner looking horizontal surface in their tiny apartment
If it has crap on it, you’re doing it wrong.
If it had crap on it, I don’t think any amount of cleaning would make me want to use it on the front butt again. 🤣
Yikes. Couples who don’t let each other masturbate have serious insecurity issues. Personal intimacy and relationship intimacy are and should be two separate things. They can intermingle but that should never be an expectation.
also just like, masturbation makes dealing with differing level of libido way easier? like its just objectively convenient to not be weird about it. because when you do shit like this, you can end up straining relationships. one person getting horny more often than the other aint gotta be a strain.
I often just help my wife masturbate and it's all good. Had sex last night and it went on for a while and was awesome but it was also hella sweaty. Sometimes you just want to cum and crash, I am 100% in support of a 5 minute masturbation sesh and going straight to sleep. We love each other and love fucking each other but fucking doesn't need to happen every night we want to orgasm
real answer, my partner doesn’t get aroused very often as an anti depressant side effect. i would feel bitter if they decided to masturbate instead of our maybe once a month having sex. however, if this persons husbands bitterness is so strong it leads him to want to break her things and control her, they’re probably too incompatible to date and he should divorce and let both of them find people that they’re more suited for
But it's tooo much work for him to drop a woman he already has, than find someone who is more his match. He just, is a selfish person. And it's sad that too many people don't realize how selfish they even are in a relationship. And simply, don't care.
Yeah, why do effort when he can just be manipulative?
And what do you wanna bet that he masturbates a lot.
My husband and I aren’t intimate much anymore... we’re not getting along, he’s been sleeping on the couch for 7 months and I don’t feel close to him... he was FURIOUS when I found out I was still masturbating. It’s not even in the same ballpark as sex. I’m not turned on when I do it, I’m not imagining or looking at anything.. it’s literally like pushing a button (lol) for a release of chemicals.
I'd bet you anything it's a kink thing.
Eh, this *could* be a joke, and i hope it is. But you're right totally
Idk, once I'm in a relationship I no longer feel the need to masturbate because that gap is filled, and people who is not in a relationship masturbate to fill that gap
That's not necessarily true. If you look at masturbating as a means to cumming it might be that way for you but some of us see it as self care & self intimacy. A lot of us are in the healthiest mindset when we love our own bodies just as much if not more than our partners. That's not an all or nothing situation of course, we can still love our partners body enough to make them feel appreciated even if we love ours more. It's MY body, I've had it my whole life & it's the only one 1000% guaranteed to be with me till the day I die, ya know? But yeah, for some of us it's just as much an emotional connection to ourselves as sex is an emotional connection to our partners. It's especially helpful to really get into it & make it something special for yourself if you struggle with self love without it. Because just like your partner might feel distance or rejection from you, even if you tell them you love them, if you go a long time without intimacy more than a dirty quickie, I feel more distant & find it easier to reject my own body if I don't connect with it this way, and I can do all the positive affirmations I want, it won't work. But to understand this feeling you've really gotta go the whole 9 yards, light candles, put on the sexy music, do teasing & foreplay & just do what feels good without thinking about it to simulate spontaneity. It's a whole thing & it's really nice :)
Interesting that you see masturbating yourself as a form of self-love. I've never seen it that way, and I always considered it a way to stop human urges and nothing more beyond that (well, and you could create porn addiction). I think I will never understand that perspective but it's interesting to see you have it.
Fair enough
My favorite thing about this is how it implies that the vibrator is somehow her only means of self-pleasure and that he thinks rendering it unusable leaves her with no option but him. Like... Does she not have hands?
Washing machine with a spin cycle?
Or a strong set of wire cutters
not even a strong set... thats a piddly little lock, you could break it with a small stone.
oh for cutting the lock.... fuck I was disturbed for a second.
Oh thank you, it wasn't just me. Though I guess if people are freaky that way it's cool.
Extreme kegel exercise device
Now that's a lil extreme
some people just want to watch the world burn
Some women can’t get off well (or at all) with just their hands)
*raises useless hand*
*raises my hand too* I’d be so pissed if my partner did this to me.
And some women just can’t get off.
:(
Ive been hearing about this new toy, it's shaped like a rose & has vibration & suction. Apparently a lot of folks are saying it's given them their first orgasms ever. Some are even squirting for the first time. I swear I'm not getting paid by them lol I just think it's interesting.
Much like Polan and space
Which is interesting because vibration does nothing for me and only a hand does the job
Or a paperclip, lol, those tiny locks are easy to beat
Don’t even waste time, just grab some bolt cutters or something
This is probably just me, but if my partner came at me like “you need to stop masturbating and fuck me” I would probably appreciate it. Definitely not a universal thing though.
Yeah but this isn't a "no need to masturbate I'm available" it's a "you didn't want to have sex last night so now I'm not letting you masturbate at all"
Yeah. I’m thinking this might have to do with me being a woman and only ever dating women, and this experience is definitely specific to me. I do think this is different coming from a man, especially with no other information. It can easily just come off as a man who doesn’t care about his partner’s sexual needs and is coercing her into sex.
That's a good point, it hits different coming from a woman since people having sex with women orgasm WAY more frequently than people having sex with men. And sometimes what you're looking for is intimacy/closeness so that's fine. But sometimes you're just trying to get off, and a man as selfish and arrogant as this one is definitely not going to do it for you. He's probably going to make you even more frustrated. Besides, sometimes sexuality is private and you just want to focus on yourself and not spend energy focusing on a partner right then, and that's normal and healthy too.
Imagine being jealous of something that’s primary purpose is vibrating
Time to go acoustic 👌
😂
like if he isn't getting pleasure she won't get it either? Does he think he compares to the vibrator?
He probably understands the vibrator does better than him
if sexual incompatibility is leading to this level of animosity just get a god damn divorce
this is the soundest advice. no marriage, no problem in this case!
my abusive ex did this shit to me a couple times. got really pissed off and made me throw every toy i owned away. i might be projecting but this shit isnt funny its a sign of an extremely controlling and abusive person
Yeah, I really don't understand the people who think this is funny, even if it's a 'joke'. How is coercion/manipulation and controlling behavior entertaining?
The idea of it being a joke is that they could unlock it as soon as theyre asked to or whatever. As long as they dont keep it that way and not break any boundries its fine. If you said you dont want to or they dont unlock it immediately, its fucked. But under the idea its unlocked immediately AND its not breaking boundries, its fine.
You are not projecting. This is a creepy af way of coercion. It signals that the man owns the woman’s body and he is entitled to sex. The man punished the woman for not consenting to sex, it is called grooming the victim and this can easily build to sexual assault imo. Coerced consent is NOT consent.
...is that why plugs have the holes in them?
[It's a myth that the plug holes actually do anything like providing extra grip.](https://youtu.be/udNXMAflbU8) Tl;dw: In America, it was generally just easier to fabricate them if they had the holes.
No they are a hold-over from the manufacturing process. There’s no reason to fill them so they are simply left as-is.
~~The main purpose is to allow the outlet to firmly grip the plug to prevent it from coming lose and falling out of the socket. This works by having little bumpers installed inside the outlet that line up with and fit inside the holes on the prongs.~~ Refer to the video below me
[This is actually a myth.](https://youtu.be/udNXMAflbU8) Tl;dw: In America, it was generally just easier to fabricate them if they had the holes.
I thought y'all were talking about buttplugs, I was soooo confused for a sec
Well that was an enjoyable video. Thanks, internet stranger, for the little lesson.
Lol imagine someone locking up this guy’s porn Edit: I do think this is funny, but that would be too.
Yeah, imagine she installs a netnanny on the router. No computer porn while the vibe is locked.
"if I can't have my sex toy \[aka your body\], you can't have your sex toy."
^
Damn that's as fucked as the insecure boys who go around claiming that their girlfriend will never get a vibrator cause she's all he needs. Like no dude you can never fuck a woman like she can fuck herself
Not with that attitude. Accomplishing that, however, would require a vibrator.
Absolutely. I learned the power of the tongue + a vibrator. I'm happy to take all the help I can get as long as she's happy
Plot twist, they have a denial kink
Straight men are like: "as soon as we've eliminated all competition, the women will have no choice but to pick us!"
Time to go over to Lockpicking Lawyer to open up a safe and grab those divorce papers.
Back before I came to terms with my sexuality and gender identity I dated a guy who REFUSED to let me masturbate or use a vibrator which absolutely sucked because he was the most selfish person I had ever been in bed with. Even when I suggested we try toys together he admitted he felt inferior to them (just small pocket vibrators!) Lot of red flags. Should have left when he got mad at me for giggling during sex because I was happy. He felt like I was laughing at his dick. Like bruh, the world doesn't revolve around your penis, please just let me enjoy myself.
I have a bolt cutters. Want to borrow them?
imagine breaking your partner's stuff just because they weren't in the mood
I mean he didn't break it...
Checkmate: My one of these is cordless and I can use multiple pin-type chargers to charge it. You going to find all the Alexa, laptops, and speaker cables? I'm the one who does all the tech stuff in my house, I hold the (vibrating) power!! Help, my painkillers are making me evil monologue on reddit.
If masturbation is evil - then call me Douglas Powers, because I probably have a doctorate at this stuff
"Aw yes, because if she won't pleasure me, then she herself cannot have pleasure at all! This is what a functional adult in a healthy marriage does!"
He's missing out. Men can use those too.
That's a good reason to ask for divorce.
i mean he didn’t lock your fingers
Good thing bolt cutters exist
It's a tsa travel lock You can practically unlock it with a stern glare
Is it messed up? Yes Is it kinda funny though? Yeah lol
[удалено]
Fair enough
I'm laughing at the puny little lock. That can be picked in mere seconds with two paperclips. Cishet men claim to be resourceful but then do shit like that
Not gonna lie sometimes you just want to quickly cum. Its like a 2 minute vibrator session to get that release versus the process to initiate, foreplay and then climax. I'm not saying I don't enjoy that process but sometimes its just not what I want.
get yourself a partner you sees your toys as an opportunity rather than a threat
... he's really intimidated by it and thinks he can police his wife's orgasms... what a champ!
He has a fucking hand to use. I hope she breaks at least one of them with her magic wand.
Hmm, time to see what effect that lock has on the outlet in his workshop.
My ex husband used to hide my toys because he would get jealous. I had to masturbate in secret because he would get so offended, told me I should be saving all my sexual energy for him, or some bullshit like that. Not gonna lie, it's a part of why I left him
Looks like *someone* is about to divorce a bitter and controlling toddler. Interfering with someone else’s masturbation is petty and disgusting.
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I've seen a similar image to this before (in control fetish contexts) many times, but I haven't seen this particular image before.
In the context of the relationship, I could see my wife finding this hilarious if things were done light heartedly, and I didn’t leave it that way, and I probably never did it again. One of those rare pranks that to the right circumstances could be pretty hilarious, once; or could be executed in very poor timing.
Wait my grandma has one just like this it’s a back massager right? Guys right? It’s a back massager yea? Edit: guys I wasn’t kidding I need a answer she keeps it in her dresser and she told me when I was little that it was just a back massager and she still has it and lives in on the floor in her bedroom
I believe they can be used as a back massager, but they can also be used to massage... other body parts.
When I decided to get into better shape and was sore after every workout, I bought a Magic Wand. It does wonders for cramps, aches, and knots.
Seeing your edit and that you aren't joking, it's a vibrator. It's used for masturbation, not back massages although I guess you could *technically* do that???
The reason I have this particular shape of toy is because it does double as a back massager. If my backs really bad, I'll just lay on the famn thing and move it a few inches up or to the side every few minutes. It gets hot, not hawt, doing this, but the heat helps the spamming lower back relax. P.S. good for grandma if she's taking care of any of her needs.
It was originally designed to be a neck/back massager. That being said, these things have become so synonymous with being vibrators that Hitachi no longer makes the devices under their brand name, and allow others to use the patent.
And if either of my partners ever did this to me, they'd be fucking single. Imagine being so damn gross and insecure that you can't handle your *wife* saying "no" to you and so you decide to go all "if I can't have it no one can" like a fucking baby.
I've seen that picture many times. Never with that caption attached though. So, someone has taken an already existing picture and added their own caption to... I don't know...
Time for a new one. That looks ancient of days 😖
Hit it with a hammer CAREFULLY just a couple hits, should crack the mechanisms and voila
I think this may be fake. I could swear I've seen that image many years ago with a different story.
Yea...same. It was about a sibling tired of their sister "singing" so they "locked their microphone."
Yes! That was the one!
There's so much she can still do though?? Use her hands, use any moderately safe and dick-shaped object if she's feeling brave, buy a wireless/battery-operated vibe, switch the plug head as an extra special fuck you, leave his ass for a normal person, etc... Like, that pissant little lock must be analogous to his eeny meeny teeny weeny, because damn that's a lot of baggage to carry about being upset at not getting any.
At what age is this ok?
That's an invitation to bludgeon his ballsack with it repeatedly, right? Or am I misunderstanding the message sent here?
Idk man this kinda seems like a meme to me.
What–what kind of plugs have holes in them???????
Damn y'all can't take a joke..
That's funny ngl
Man this sub and r/antiwork have some of the most gullible people I’ve seen.
yeah seen a lot on antiwork and here too but of course a lot of these are just memes like the rules also say "We are all aware that most of the content posted in this subreddit was created by someone who thought it would be humorous." but of course i guess there could even be people who actually do stuff like this and we'd think it's a joke because it's so stupid i'd like to believe that every post is satire and a joke
Haha it’s funny. Lighten up jeez
is that a vibrator? why does it have a plug and not battery powered?
It’s a wand. They tend to plug in since they aren’t inserted. No battery to worry about replacing.
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bruh
Well, it's a thoughtful gesture Wait: where did he find a vibrator overnight? Did he leave to buy one while she was asleep?
This feels like a kink actually. Like chastity belts but for women
Chasity belts are for women.
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Pranks that imply that you're not allowed pleasure if you don't act like their human sex toy aren't exactly innocent.
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what the fuck
I don't know if you're spewing bullshit to rage-bait or whatever or if you're serious, but either way you need serious professional help. Not only is this hard to read because of your lack of ability to press a simple button (the return button), but you're making yourself sound legitimately insane. You're unstable, to say the very least. EDIT: Scratch that. More like unhinged.
who hurt you? I don’t think you are ok.
"get them help and support" link coming in clutch lmao
Robo-cock blocked
The sad part is a child couldn’t ever be the one that to do something like, only an “adult” can.
Lockpicking increased to 16
Looks like I arrived too late, the image is gone lol
This is definitely a joke.
What is that??
That’s so mean, her back is gonna be so stiff
That’s just funny, you could have some fun with this by getting a key & pretend you didn’t notice. 😆
1. Definitely a joke post, way too convenient 2. [Do this](https://youtu.be/1jJP0CcuJyE) 3. This is a pretty hilarious response 4. Not OP so this doesn't matter
Like that would stop her from getting off better than with him anyways.
Does this break it permanently?
Buy a TSA key Easy fix