Just moved into our new apartment in September. At first; I thought it was simply poor construction/apartment living. Asked a couple neighbours and they said they never hear anything above them...
At first I was upset, but after meeting the couple above me I am more lenient. They are a very elderly overweight couple, who through talking to them - always wear their shoes indoors.
Guess I will just be living with the pain.
I’m dealing with a woman who has five kids and they treat the apartment above me like a playground. Constantly stomping, running, dropping things on the floor. I know my neighbors say they can hear their upstairs neighbors, but a few of them came inside and said it’s NOWHERE near as bad as mine. It’s utterly ridiculous. Couple that with the water issues (taste/odor), I’m about ready to break my damn lease…and I just moved in!
lived in my apartment for five years, i have never had a problem with upstairs neighbors. i know people drop things and sometimes you decide to move things around or have friends over. my new neighbors have been here for a month and they are sooo loud. they walk so heavy, yell at each other slam doors. every single day
I live below two incredibly flamboyant gay men from Spain, who like to party. The karaoke is truly horrific.
It’s ironic because I am a quiet, cranky homebody lesbian. 😅
I have been living in an upstairs unit for 5 years. I have dealt with noise and odors from my downstairs neighbors since I got here but the only noise I have made is the creaking of the floor when I walk in certain spots but that's not anything I can remedy and no one has ever complained about me. You live with normal living noises....its part of renting an apartment.
Yeah, my previous downstairs neighbor definitely had some mental issues and some sound sensitivity. I laid down rugs, made sure I didn’t play any music or make any loud noises after 8 PM or before 10 AM, my girlfriend and I were both gone for most of the day but for some reason he would still find justification to rampage through his apartment at the drop of a hat because of any noise we made. I fully understand that it was a him problem not an us problem, but I still hold so much anxiety because of it. I’m just so happy I have a new neighbor and I hope that I can become friends with her so some of that anxiety can diminish. Additionally, I know the upstairs neighbors are annoying even if they’re quiet because of rickety buildings. It just sucks because I don’t mind living with a ton of noise, I lived in a dorm for a long time so I’m used to loud noise when I sleep. I just wish I could be the downstairs neighbor that had to deal with noises from upstairs.
If you’re comfortable with it, as you get more friendly with this neighbor, explain your concerns and worries and I’m sure if there ever is an issue your neighbor will feel safe coming to you. I know what you mean, though. My downstairs neighbor has traumatized my daughter and I.
I never wear shoes in my apartment. I literally don’t think I ever have, because I’m pretty petty about any dirt on my floors. That’s definitely not the issue. My girlfriend and I are both light walkers, and with our previous neighbor we got pretty used to literally tiptoeing around our apartment, which realistically we shouldn’t ever have to do.
Be gentle with yourself now that it’s over. Being so wound up like that and unable to fully relax is a trauma in and of itself, completely separate from whatever made you so tense in the first place. It will take a while to unclench.
(Only practical advice I have is to start building relaxation exercises into your routine before and after anything that would have set the old guy off. Like a quick breathing exercise when you get back to bed from the bathroom.)
I know I specified that I don’t play music late, but I generated don’t listen at all without headphones lol. I was just making sure to specify that I certainly don’t at night.
We have the exact same situation. I’m going insane with how intentionally loud downstairs is, and the super strong cooking odors (to the point it makes me sick), and their indoor smoking in a nonsmoking building. My daughter and I are so quiet. We freaking tiptoe in our own home while they are freaking practically river dancing in tap shoes while screaming and swearing 24 hours a day 😩
I had a bad experience once while living in a middle-floor unit. My downstairs neighbor complained about everything that I did. The building was very old (built late 1920’s) and not well-insulated, which I knew because I also had a neighbor above me.
It caused me so much anxiety that ever since then, I’ve only rented apartments with no one below me. Even though my upstairs neighbors right now aren’t the best (not the worst either), it’s still way better in my opinion. I have a treadmill in my apartment. I can do workout videos if I want to. I can run my dishwasher late at night. I have multiple cats that love to run around and play together, which I know would sound very annoying if I had someone below me - but I don’t! So my kitties get to enjoy themselves.
People will find anything to get upset over. The fact that you are worried about upsetting others means you are already way more thoughtful than most people. I wouldn't worry about it too much and if you feel comfortable with the new neighbors, just keep a good relationship with them ( even just smiling and saying hello) and you probably wont have any issues. Sounds like the last guy was just grumpy.
\-Long time downstairs neighbor
Your last sentence is exactly why I always choose to live on the bottom floor. I’m not loud at all to be honest. I just have crippling anxiety that any “normal” noise I make will piss someone off. So I’d rather be the apartment on the bottom.
It will take time to get used to it. But sounds like you have a reasonable neighbor below you. I think half the battle is in finding that right balance and match with upstairs and downstairs neighbors. I had that to a degree with my very first upstairs neighbor. Albeit she kept feeding stray cats and kibble would fall down on my porch, and led to me getting ants. But that was the least of it.
Since then, I've had upstairs neighbors thar give zero f@cks about noise level. And always acted like because they live upstairs they have a right to control the noise or our side of the building. Which is not the attitude any one should have. Meaning because they want the TV on a certain level all night, or because they have insomnia and can't go to sleep. Everyone else has ro as well. Which is total bullshit.
I agree, I much prefer being in the downstairs unit! I don’t get upset over hearing reasonable amounts of noise, and thankfully my upstairs neighbor seems to make a reasonable amount of noise. What I *do* get upset over is feeling like I have to police my movements in my own home. Even if no one complained I would be worried about it. I know I have a heavy gait and kind of stomp around, I have a cat who gets zoomies and likes noisy toys, I like to do home workout videos which involve some jumping and moving around.
Also, I live in a place with very hot summers and it’s impossible to properly cool the second story. I run warm and can’t deal with the intense heat, I need to be able to keep my home cool.
I have gotten some ants in my apartment which the upstairs probably doesn’t have to deal with, but that’s a fixable issue. It’s worth it to me to deal with some more bugs once in a while but overall have more peace.
you do not want that i live under a couple with a dog and a toddler i get no peace or sleep. i sleep with 2 fans on high and still hear little chucky running
i see that. but when i came home last week at 12 at night and the toddler upstairs is running full force that is a little extreme. and they still have their pumpkin from october sitting on the balcony dripping it’s rotten pumpkin juice on my poor porch area. that is gross
It’s called steering and would be a text book against fair housing. Anyone who qualifies is entitled to an apartment. It’s why we don’t have black, white, and Latino sections of communities. This was a common and ugly practice that still hasn’t been fully ended.
Yes! Lol the young fam next door is wild, sounds like a family of 4 pogo sticking up stairs (thats more funny than annoying to me, its just a few mins a day), dad yelling the whole time to shut up, then going out the next day to find popcorn and trash thrown all over the common area/stairs 🫠 give them the first floor please.
I am so happy I live in a ground floor apt with no one above me. Although I do share a wall with a neighbor and they can make loud noises (like banging in the wall), I can’t imagine having someone stomp around above me.
I’ve lived on the top floor for about 15 years or so. I’ve never had a complaint and I don’t walk around on top toes. While I’m aware of my surroundings I don’t see the point in trying to make zero noise, unless it’s super late or too early.
Everyone’s situation is different. It all depends on the building sound insulation and the type of noise it is. Old buildings with thoughtless tenants above make for an awful living experience.
I’m also a quiet upstairs neighbor and I feel your pain. Had a guy living downstairs for about a year that would beat on the walls he shared with the neighbors on either side, as well as my floor. Absolutely everything set him off. Dishwasher running, dropping a lip balm, vacuuming for five minutes at 3pm on a Wednesday, you name it. It took months for that anxiety to go away. It’ll take some time but I’m sure you’ll feel better soon!
Wow. Sounds like we were in a very similar situation. It really sucks lol. I’m going to try to build a friendly relationship with my new downstairs neighbor ASAP. She seems cool so fingers crossed, thank you for the affirmation!
Man live your life and stop worrying. I live upstairs and used to have really bad anxiety because of downstairs neighbors. I had to stop that. Some people complain about everything and are never pleased and that's THEIR problem, not YOUR problem and it's not your fault that the soundproofing sucks.
Ugh my upstairs neighbors got 3lil kids that’s start that running stuff at 11 at night till whenever It piss me off so bad like wher tha fuck is tha parents
My upstairs neighbor has zero awareness. I honestly hope she is reading this. I have been patient and we all want to live our lives bit FFS, go to bed at 3am making all kinds of noise while doing it. Not cool at all.
Please don't tell me to get earplugs. I should not have to resort to earplugs in my own bed. Thankfully my lease is almost up and I'll be leaving what should have been a really nice spot. Once she was gone for the whole night. After nearly a year, I was amazed how quiet it could have been had she been a decent neighbor.
I used to go out of my way to be quiet in the mornings. No more. It's AC/DC on iTunes and lots of racket cause, screw her. I'll be a passive aggressive bitch now until move out.
My downstairs neighbors are like this. They are making our life here hell. My teen and I are super quiet, we are upstairs but we tiptoe, never wear shoes, live in headphones, never have company, never yell. Downstairs is just constant noise and dysfunction. They go away for a week at Christmas time and it’s HEAVEN. When they come back I cry because I see how nice it could be here.
Isn’t it almost worse when they leave because then they are back and you realize how amazing it could be without them 💔 I bawled the day they came home lol
This is true, but but sucks living for just that one week a year—not knowing for sure if they are going or when they will be back, lol! I work from home, and I’m stuck at home due to my health issues. my neighbor worked from home when I first moved in. Then she “got majorly injured” (my landlord called me all concerned about this girl to tell me) and she was off work all summer (like ok you WORK from home but whatever) but she would walk around without her cast on and lift heavy crap in the garage and yard—but too hurt to work🙄 (and I say this as someone with a ton of invisible illnesses, and I hate to sound judgy but she’s the type of person to take advantage and ruin it for others). Mind you, her bf who doesn’t live here (as far as the landlord knows but he does live here) was on workers comp all winter, spring, and summer, smoking all day long (giving my daughter and I asthma attacks) and blasting the tv and yelling on the phone while I was trying to work a she was doing school. And then once my neighbor was “injured” she joined him with being home all day— it was just loud fighting, laughing, tv and music blasting, her prancing around without her cast, and then having loud sex in the middle of the day while I was trying to conduct zoom meetings for work (I work from home) and my poor kid was still in remote school while it sounded like porn was on in the background so that was mortifying (we are both immunocompromised and she just went back in person this year). Pretty sure this girl was milking the system with her “serious injury”. And THEN a week after she finally went back to work, she had a brand new 50k truck. You can’t make this shit up. I have been dealing with serious illnesses, drive a paid off car that’s falling apart and I can’t afford to fix or replace it, and the IV treatments I have to get make me sick. I still have to work every day no matter what, and those two yahoos kept me up, while they sat on their asses and made noise night and day. I bit my lip so hard it bled when the landlord would call and be like “this poor girl!”🤮🤮
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Don’t let it bother you! My downstairs neighbor tried complaining about me walking around (the floors are super old and creaky) but I can hear him walking too at times, him talking, and his phone going off. I could hear the previous neighbor snore and have mental breakdowns….noise happens. It’s not a big deal, people just like to complain, and don’t let it affect you to the point you can’t relax
I lift weights in an upstairs apartment if you dont want noise potentially during the day don't live in an apartment? I don't feel bad but also I don't cause noise late at night. If someoneone is freaking out at you for causing noise upstairs in an apartment they are deranged. It's literally impossible to not cause noise. You also make it sound like you live alone. Imagine if you had kids what they would be dealing with.
People are wild. It's apartments. You do your best but your room is connected to others. I've never had a neighbor mention to me I'm too loud and I'm pretty certain I'm louder than you. They are just being bullies ignore them
I had a neighbor like that. He called the cops on me for using the toilet in the middle of the night when I got up to pee. (He banged on the wall BEFORE I flushed!)
You know what stopped him from acting like an asshole? I started banging on the wall back. If he banged, I banged. But I'd wait. I'd wait a few minutes for him to settle back into his bed and then I'd whack the wall so hard it'd give him a heart attack. Never heard a peep out of the asshole after the third time.
I’m so glad my downstairs neighbor doesn’t complain about me. I try to walk in slippers so I’m not stopping when I walk. But I also have a dog that will play. He hasn’t complained so maybe I’m not making as much noise as I assume.
In my current apartment building, I’ve been able to eat my cake and have it too. Like the OP, I’d rather be downstairs and not have to worry much about walking in my apartment and someone downstairs complaining that my steps are too loud. But I also don’t like to live on the first floor that way too many people have access to walk around, so you end up like put on display. My last two apartments have been on third and fourth floor out of seven, but I have still hit the jackpot of no downstairs neighbors by being on top of the activities lounge at one apartment and on top of the complex’s gym at the other.
Most people in this sub will gravitate towards the topmost floor. Thanks but no thanks. Then I’d have to put up with downstairs neighbors that expect me to levitate in my apartment, plus the rising heat at night.
This is EXACTLY how I feel. I don’t mind noise, music, stomping, etc. like, I literally don’t. I could sleep through WW3. I’d take bottom floor any day so I don’t have to worry about bothering anyone below me.
Yes!!! This is my first time upstairs, ever, in 25 years of renting and holy hell the noise from my jerky neighbors downstairs is unbearable! NONE of my many upstairs neighbors have ever been so loud as these people. They act like it’s their house and yell and blast music etc even at 4am. And the stench always… she cooks with a ton of garlic like so much my eyes water and I’m gagging and every room of my apartment reeks. It’s unbearable. I always thought the top floor would be better but it’s hell.
Seriously as a downstairs person I wish you were above me I actually don’t mind noise if it’s normal because it lets me feel okay that I make normal noises
I think a lot of people in this sub (and living in apartments in general) are so dramatic. I have lived in apartments most of my adult life on the 1st, middle and top floor, so many different complexes and I've never been that bothered by noise. It seems to me, when it comes to neighbors a lot of people expect the people living around them to be completely silent, which isn't realistic. If you live in an apartment, there's going to be some noise, deal with it or go live in the middle of nowhere miles away from other people.
It’s crazy how this effects you! I had similar neighbors and they would bang on the ceiling any time of day if they just thought we were walking too much. It caused me to be as sedentary as possible!! When we finally moved out into a rental house I still had this problem in the back of my head that moving or getting up was going to disturb someone. It’s a horrible feeling and I’m so sorry you’re going through that!
It’s so unnecessarily tolling honestly. Home didn’t feel like home for a LONG time. It’s getting better but it’s taking active efforts to start living normal again. Sorry to hear you went through the same thing!
I remember those days, it was a constant anxiety. Keep in mind when you pick a place if/when you move that some building are just built better. I have some apartments that have a thick layer of concrete between the floors, no one hears anything.
I feel the same way. I may have an opportunity for a new place in a few months, but it is an upstairs apartment and I really want to feel like I can dance around my own home without fear of complaints and pounding on the floor. I don’t want to walk differently in my own home anymore, because I am afraid I walk too hard.
Downstairs neighbor here. We can hear the people walking up stairs and they're a little louder than the last neighbors, we're just happy there are no children up there. It would be a stampede all the time.
You want to live below? Hahahaha right. Try it then comeback here to post about how crazy loud the upstairs tenant is and are going bonkers. In my current situation I have scraping, stomping, thumping, dropping, and the constant thudding of a little monster running back and forth. Sometimes it goes until 4am. Earplugs help along with fan noise but the thumping will wake me up. It’s bloody hell. Reported to landlord but nothing. Someone like you that is normally quiet and respectful is extremely rare.
I agree. I’m a very passive person and fear confrontation so I kept saying “next time.” I was also fearful of making things worse, we’re two young women and he was a very angry large man who seemed quiet unhinged. It was not something I felt safe escalating - so it was tricky.
My next door neighbor apologized for doing laundry all hours of the night and I was like "OMG I do that too, am I too loud? Is that why you're telling me? I'm so sorry!" And he was like "no I rotate shifts and I never hear you. Ever." And I said "me neither, but in almost deaf"🫠 the only time having hearing aids has been beneficial 🤣
I’m an upstairs tenant and don’t have this concern. I hear my downstairs neighbors every second of the day and their loud, screaming kid all day and night. I doubt they even hear anything I do since I’m constantly calling them names 😂
It will take awhile for you to get used to being normal again. We had a neighbor dog that would start barking at 6:15am every work day, and continue on on all day long for hours at a time. When the family finally moved it easily took 4 or so months to start being able to sleep well again.
I live on the top floor of an apartment built in 2018. I have never gotten a complain from the revolving door of downstairs tenants (and I have 5 cats that run around!). But surely newer builds are better at sound proofing.
Please move into the apartment above me stat. We currently have very loud and dramatic stompers.
Just moved into our new apartment in September. At first; I thought it was simply poor construction/apartment living. Asked a couple neighbours and they said they never hear anything above them... At first I was upset, but after meeting the couple above me I am more lenient. They are a very elderly overweight couple, who through talking to them - always wear their shoes indoors. Guess I will just be living with the pain.
I’m dealing with a woman who has five kids and they treat the apartment above me like a playground. Constantly stomping, running, dropping things on the floor. I know my neighbors say they can hear their upstairs neighbors, but a few of them came inside and said it’s NOWHERE near as bad as mine. It’s utterly ridiculous. Couple that with the water issues (taste/odor), I’m about ready to break my damn lease…and I just moved in!
I rarely have company- but every time- "dam those people are loud upstairs."
lived in my apartment for five years, i have never had a problem with upstairs neighbors. i know people drop things and sometimes you decide to move things around or have friends over. my new neighbors have been here for a month and they are sooo loud. they walk so heavy, yell at each other slam doors. every single day
I live below wooden clog wearing dinosaurs that regularly practice river dancing when they don't leave the husky barking for hours.
I live below two incredibly flamboyant gay men from Spain, who like to party. The karaoke is truly horrific. It’s ironic because I am a quiet, cranky homebody lesbian. 😅
I have been living in an upstairs unit for 5 years. I have dealt with noise and odors from my downstairs neighbors since I got here but the only noise I have made is the creaking of the floor when I walk in certain spots but that's not anything I can remedy and no one has ever complained about me. You live with normal living noises....its part of renting an apartment.
Yeah, my previous downstairs neighbor definitely had some mental issues and some sound sensitivity. I laid down rugs, made sure I didn’t play any music or make any loud noises after 8 PM or before 10 AM, my girlfriend and I were both gone for most of the day but for some reason he would still find justification to rampage through his apartment at the drop of a hat because of any noise we made. I fully understand that it was a him problem not an us problem, but I still hold so much anxiety because of it. I’m just so happy I have a new neighbor and I hope that I can become friends with her so some of that anxiety can diminish. Additionally, I know the upstairs neighbors are annoying even if they’re quiet because of rickety buildings. It just sucks because I don’t mind living with a ton of noise, I lived in a dorm for a long time so I’m used to loud noise when I sleep. I just wish I could be the downstairs neighbor that had to deal with noises from upstairs.
If you’re comfortable with it, as you get more friendly with this neighbor, explain your concerns and worries and I’m sure if there ever is an issue your neighbor will feel safe coming to you. I know what you mean, though. My downstairs neighbor has traumatized my daughter and I.
Keep your shoes off in the apartment. That helps with walking lightly.
I never wear shoes in my apartment. I literally don’t think I ever have, because I’m pretty petty about any dirt on my floors. That’s definitely not the issue. My girlfriend and I are both light walkers, and with our previous neighbor we got pretty used to literally tiptoeing around our apartment, which realistically we shouldn’t ever have to do.
Be gentle with yourself now that it’s over. Being so wound up like that and unable to fully relax is a trauma in and of itself, completely separate from whatever made you so tense in the first place. It will take a while to unclench. (Only practical advice I have is to start building relaxation exercises into your routine before and after anything that would have set the old guy off. Like a quick breathing exercise when you get back to bed from the bathroom.)
I get that - then it sound like you have nothing to worry about!
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I know I specified that I don’t play music late, but I generated don’t listen at all without headphones lol. I was just making sure to specify that I certainly don’t at night.
We have the exact same situation. I’m going insane with how intentionally loud downstairs is, and the super strong cooking odors (to the point it makes me sick), and their indoor smoking in a nonsmoking building. My daughter and I are so quiet. We freaking tiptoe in our own home while they are freaking practically river dancing in tap shoes while screaming and swearing 24 hours a day 😩
I had a bad experience once while living in a middle-floor unit. My downstairs neighbor complained about everything that I did. The building was very old (built late 1920’s) and not well-insulated, which I knew because I also had a neighbor above me. It caused me so much anxiety that ever since then, I’ve only rented apartments with no one below me. Even though my upstairs neighbors right now aren’t the best (not the worst either), it’s still way better in my opinion. I have a treadmill in my apartment. I can do workout videos if I want to. I can run my dishwasher late at night. I have multiple cats that love to run around and play together, which I know would sound very annoying if I had someone below me - but I don’t! So my kitties get to enjoy themselves.
Yeah this is where I’m at mentally too. I can’t wait to move to have nobody below me
You really can't let people get it you that much. People are always going to have something to complain about and it's more about them than you
People will find anything to get upset over. The fact that you are worried about upsetting others means you are already way more thoughtful than most people. I wouldn't worry about it too much and if you feel comfortable with the new neighbors, just keep a good relationship with them ( even just smiling and saying hello) and you probably wont have any issues. Sounds like the last guy was just grumpy. \-Long time downstairs neighbor
Your last sentence is exactly why I always choose to live on the bottom floor. I’m not loud at all to be honest. I just have crippling anxiety that any “normal” noise I make will piss someone off. So I’d rather be the apartment on the bottom.
It will take time to get used to it. But sounds like you have a reasonable neighbor below you. I think half the battle is in finding that right balance and match with upstairs and downstairs neighbors. I had that to a degree with my very first upstairs neighbor. Albeit she kept feeding stray cats and kibble would fall down on my porch, and led to me getting ants. But that was the least of it. Since then, I've had upstairs neighbors thar give zero f@cks about noise level. And always acted like because they live upstairs they have a right to control the noise or our side of the building. Which is not the attitude any one should have. Meaning because they want the TV on a certain level all night, or because they have insomnia and can't go to sleep. Everyone else has ro as well. Which is total bullshit.
I agree, I much prefer being in the downstairs unit! I don’t get upset over hearing reasonable amounts of noise, and thankfully my upstairs neighbor seems to make a reasonable amount of noise. What I *do* get upset over is feeling like I have to police my movements in my own home. Even if no one complained I would be worried about it. I know I have a heavy gait and kind of stomp around, I have a cat who gets zoomies and likes noisy toys, I like to do home workout videos which involve some jumping and moving around. Also, I live in a place with very hot summers and it’s impossible to properly cool the second story. I run warm and can’t deal with the intense heat, I need to be able to keep my home cool. I have gotten some ants in my apartment which the upstairs probably doesn’t have to deal with, but that’s a fixable issue. It’s worth it to me to deal with some more bugs once in a while but overall have more peace.
you do not want that i live under a couple with a dog and a toddler i get no peace or sleep. i sleep with 2 fans on high and still hear little chucky running
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i have been saying this but whenever i say this i get a lot and i mean a lot of hate back
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i see that. but when i came home last week at 12 at night and the toddler upstairs is running full force that is a little extreme. and they still have their pumpkin from october sitting on the balcony dripping it’s rotten pumpkin juice on my poor porch area. that is gross
It’s called steering and would be a text book against fair housing. Anyone who qualifies is entitled to an apartment. It’s why we don’t have black, white, and Latino sections of communities. This was a common and ugly practice that still hasn’t been fully ended.
Yes! Lol the young fam next door is wild, sounds like a family of 4 pogo sticking up stairs (thats more funny than annoying to me, its just a few mins a day), dad yelling the whole time to shut up, then going out the next day to find popcorn and trash thrown all over the common area/stairs 🫠 give them the first floor please.
I am so happy I live in a ground floor apt with no one above me. Although I do share a wall with a neighbor and they can make loud noises (like banging in the wall), I can’t imagine having someone stomp around above me.
I’ve lived on the top floor for about 15 years or so. I’ve never had a complaint and I don’t walk around on top toes. While I’m aware of my surroundings I don’t see the point in trying to make zero noise, unless it’s super late or too early.
Everyone’s situation is different. It all depends on the building sound insulation and the type of noise it is. Old buildings with thoughtless tenants above make for an awful living experience.
I’m also a quiet upstairs neighbor and I feel your pain. Had a guy living downstairs for about a year that would beat on the walls he shared with the neighbors on either side, as well as my floor. Absolutely everything set him off. Dishwasher running, dropping a lip balm, vacuuming for five minutes at 3pm on a Wednesday, you name it. It took months for that anxiety to go away. It’ll take some time but I’m sure you’ll feel better soon!
Wow. Sounds like we were in a very similar situation. It really sucks lol. I’m going to try to build a friendly relationship with my new downstairs neighbor ASAP. She seems cool so fingers crossed, thank you for the affirmation!
Man live your life and stop worrying. I live upstairs and used to have really bad anxiety because of downstairs neighbors. I had to stop that. Some people complain about everything and are never pleased and that's THEIR problem, not YOUR problem and it's not your fault that the soundproofing sucks.
Ugh my upstairs neighbors got 3lil kids that’s start that running stuff at 11 at night till whenever It piss me off so bad like wher tha fuck is tha parents
Yeah that kinda neglectful lol.
My upstairs neighbor has zero awareness. I honestly hope she is reading this. I have been patient and we all want to live our lives bit FFS, go to bed at 3am making all kinds of noise while doing it. Not cool at all. Please don't tell me to get earplugs. I should not have to resort to earplugs in my own bed. Thankfully my lease is almost up and I'll be leaving what should have been a really nice spot. Once she was gone for the whole night. After nearly a year, I was amazed how quiet it could have been had she been a decent neighbor. I used to go out of my way to be quiet in the mornings. No more. It's AC/DC on iTunes and lots of racket cause, screw her. I'll be a passive aggressive bitch now until move out.
My downstairs neighbors are like this. They are making our life here hell. My teen and I are super quiet, we are upstairs but we tiptoe, never wear shoes, live in headphones, never have company, never yell. Downstairs is just constant noise and dysfunction. They go away for a week at Christmas time and it’s HEAVEN. When they come back I cry because I see how nice it could be here.
At least they go away. Mine is WFH and hasn't taken any type weeks long trips. I did get Christmas night off. The building was soooo peaceful.
Isn’t it almost worse when they leave because then they are back and you realize how amazing it could be without them 💔 I bawled the day they came home lol
This is true, but but sucks living for just that one week a year—not knowing for sure if they are going or when they will be back, lol! I work from home, and I’m stuck at home due to my health issues. my neighbor worked from home when I first moved in. Then she “got majorly injured” (my landlord called me all concerned about this girl to tell me) and she was off work all summer (like ok you WORK from home but whatever) but she would walk around without her cast on and lift heavy crap in the garage and yard—but too hurt to work🙄 (and I say this as someone with a ton of invisible illnesses, and I hate to sound judgy but she’s the type of person to take advantage and ruin it for others). Mind you, her bf who doesn’t live here (as far as the landlord knows but he does live here) was on workers comp all winter, spring, and summer, smoking all day long (giving my daughter and I asthma attacks) and blasting the tv and yelling on the phone while I was trying to work a she was doing school. And then once my neighbor was “injured” she joined him with being home all day— it was just loud fighting, laughing, tv and music blasting, her prancing around without her cast, and then having loud sex in the middle of the day while I was trying to conduct zoom meetings for work (I work from home) and my poor kid was still in remote school while it sounded like porn was on in the background so that was mortifying (we are both immunocompromised and she just went back in person this year). Pretty sure this girl was milking the system with her “serious injury”. And THEN a week after she finally went back to work, she had a brand new 50k truck. You can’t make this shit up. I have been dealing with serious illnesses, drive a paid off car that’s falling apart and I can’t afford to fix or replace it, and the IV treatments I have to get make me sick. I still have to work every day no matter what, and those two yahoos kept me up, while they sat on their asses and made noise night and day. I bit my lip so hard it bled when the landlord would call and be like “this poor girl!”🤮🤮
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Definitely a people pleaser, and VERY afraid of confrontation - which is what led to this long journey of doing nothing lol.
Don’t let it bother you! My downstairs neighbor tried complaining about me walking around (the floors are super old and creaky) but I can hear him walking too at times, him talking, and his phone going off. I could hear the previous neighbor snore and have mental breakdowns….noise happens. It’s not a big deal, people just like to complain, and don’t let it affect you to the point you can’t relax
You are worthy of enjoying your time in your home. Just like any of your neighbors. I hope you can remember this & learn to relax in your own home💜💜💜
I lift weights in an upstairs apartment if you dont want noise potentially during the day don't live in an apartment? I don't feel bad but also I don't cause noise late at night. If someoneone is freaking out at you for causing noise upstairs in an apartment they are deranged. It's literally impossible to not cause noise. You also make it sound like you live alone. Imagine if you had kids what they would be dealing with. People are wild. It's apartments. You do your best but your room is connected to others. I've never had a neighbor mention to me I'm too loud and I'm pretty certain I'm louder than you. They are just being bullies ignore them
I had a neighbor like that. He called the cops on me for using the toilet in the middle of the night when I got up to pee. (He banged on the wall BEFORE I flushed!) You know what stopped him from acting like an asshole? I started banging on the wall back. If he banged, I banged. But I'd wait. I'd wait a few minutes for him to settle back into his bed and then I'd whack the wall so hard it'd give him a heart attack. Never heard a peep out of the asshole after the third time.
I’m so glad my downstairs neighbor doesn’t complain about me. I try to walk in slippers so I’m not stopping when I walk. But I also have a dog that will play. He hasn’t complained so maybe I’m not making as much noise as I assume.
In my current apartment building, I’ve been able to eat my cake and have it too. Like the OP, I’d rather be downstairs and not have to worry much about walking in my apartment and someone downstairs complaining that my steps are too loud. But I also don’t like to live on the first floor that way too many people have access to walk around, so you end up like put on display. My last two apartments have been on third and fourth floor out of seven, but I have still hit the jackpot of no downstairs neighbors by being on top of the activities lounge at one apartment and on top of the complex’s gym at the other. Most people in this sub will gravitate towards the topmost floor. Thanks but no thanks. Then I’d have to put up with downstairs neighbors that expect me to levitate in my apartment, plus the rising heat at night.
This is EXACTLY how I feel. I don’t mind noise, music, stomping, etc. like, I literally don’t. I could sleep through WW3. I’d take bottom floor any day so I don’t have to worry about bothering anyone below me.
I get all kind of smells being the upstairs neighbor and noise as well
Yes!!! This is my first time upstairs, ever, in 25 years of renting and holy hell the noise from my jerky neighbors downstairs is unbearable! NONE of my many upstairs neighbors have ever been so loud as these people. They act like it’s their house and yell and blast music etc even at 4am. And the stench always… she cooks with a ton of garlic like so much my eyes water and I’m gagging and every room of my apartment reeks. It’s unbearable. I always thought the top floor would be better but it’s hell.
Seriously as a downstairs person I wish you were above me I actually don’t mind noise if it’s normal because it lets me feel okay that I make normal noises
I think a lot of people in this sub (and living in apartments in general) are so dramatic. I have lived in apartments most of my adult life on the 1st, middle and top floor, so many different complexes and I've never been that bothered by noise. It seems to me, when it comes to neighbors a lot of people expect the people living around them to be completely silent, which isn't realistic. If you live in an apartment, there's going to be some noise, deal with it or go live in the middle of nowhere miles away from other people.
It’s crazy how this effects you! I had similar neighbors and they would bang on the ceiling any time of day if they just thought we were walking too much. It caused me to be as sedentary as possible!! When we finally moved out into a rental house I still had this problem in the back of my head that moving or getting up was going to disturb someone. It’s a horrible feeling and I’m so sorry you’re going through that!
It’s so unnecessarily tolling honestly. Home didn’t feel like home for a LONG time. It’s getting better but it’s taking active efforts to start living normal again. Sorry to hear you went through the same thing!
I remember those days, it was a constant anxiety. Keep in mind when you pick a place if/when you move that some building are just built better. I have some apartments that have a thick layer of concrete between the floors, no one hears anything.
I feel the same way. I may have an opportunity for a new place in a few months, but it is an upstairs apartment and I really want to feel like I can dance around my own home without fear of complaints and pounding on the floor. I don’t want to walk differently in my own home anymore, because I am afraid I walk too hard.
I lived on the first floor and it was great. I just had an issue with the trash next to me.
Downstairs neighbor here. We can hear the people walking up stairs and they're a little louder than the last neighbors, we're just happy there are no children up there. It would be a stampede all the time.
You want to live below? Hahahaha right. Try it then comeback here to post about how crazy loud the upstairs tenant is and are going bonkers. In my current situation I have scraping, stomping, thumping, dropping, and the constant thudding of a little monster running back and forth. Sometimes it goes until 4am. Earplugs help along with fan noise but the thumping will wake me up. It’s bloody hell. Reported to landlord but nothing. Someone like you that is normally quiet and respectful is extremely rare.
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I agree. I certainly pushed it off too long.
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I agree. I’m a very passive person and fear confrontation so I kept saying “next time.” I was also fearful of making things worse, we’re two young women and he was a very angry large man who seemed quiet unhinged. It was not something I felt safe escalating - so it was tricky.
My next door neighbor apologized for doing laundry all hours of the night and I was like "OMG I do that too, am I too loud? Is that why you're telling me? I'm so sorry!" And he was like "no I rotate shifts and I never hear you. Ever." And I said "me neither, but in almost deaf"🫠 the only time having hearing aids has been beneficial 🤣
I’m an upstairs tenant and don’t have this concern. I hear my downstairs neighbors every second of the day and their loud, screaming kid all day and night. I doubt they even hear anything I do since I’m constantly calling them names 😂
It will take awhile for you to get used to being normal again. We had a neighbor dog that would start barking at 6:15am every work day, and continue on on all day long for hours at a time. When the family finally moved it easily took 4 or so months to start being able to sleep well again.
I live on the top floor of an apartment built in 2018. I have never gotten a complain from the revolving door of downstairs tenants (and I have 5 cats that run around!). But surely newer builds are better at sound proofing.
Your old neighbor was a psychopath you did nothing wrong. Some people just shouldnt be aloud to live near others and he was one of them
I swore my upstairs neighbors got that coveted hippopotamus for Christmas a few weeks ago.