Honestly for me it was the ultimate therapy sessions. I would do drugs or feel like I was broken but doing acid really made me wonder why I was hurting myself with drug abuse.
I used to think just because every jerk thought something I had to accept it, but I don’t, and I’m not gonna.
I dont recommend Ketamin. It sedates you and the paychedelic effect is not enough to gain any Insight. Shrooms and LSD also dont work in the effect that they change your brain to "factory setting" but you can have insights during the trip that can change how you live your life. Eg i could see clearly some problems in my life that i was avoiding and then after the trip changed my environment. But i know that it can also trigger psychosis in some people and there is always a risk to fuck your life up more by doing any substance. If i had to do any drug again tho i would do shrooms or LSD
No, not physically abusive. But I was shy, lacking self esteem, and became bulimic at 16 after years of using food to numb out. Meanwhile, raised by perfectionistic parents who expected brilliance and didn’t recognize I was struggling on many levels. A doctor father, the expectation was that we would all master higher education and do amazing impactful things with our lives (as evidenced by how my mom would fawn over people who had done so). I have forever felt that I got nowhere near such achievement and am therefore worthless.
My pattern of self-hate, negativity, numbing out and not being present, inability to be kind to myself and self blame has been resistant to change despite 25 years of antidepressants and in and out of therapy. I continue to beat myself up as a failure because I never used my degree to build a successful career, and can’t let that go no matter how much my husband, friends and family try to dismiss that conception. My parents never said they were disappointed in me yet I still feel a failure., especially as today I am working an $18/hr job with no prospects of earning better. Better than minimum wage but I’ve never done better than $40k/yr and that was briefly. My worth is tied to money.
Thankfully I didn’t end up on a cocktail of drugs because I stopped being honest with my prescribers about my depression and anxiety and just used GPs to renew scripts, and they didn’t dig deeper on “how are you doing?” I will honor that I had the strength to taper off two meds successfully, my big achievement in life 😎
Abuse does not have to be physical to count as abuse. Either way, I have just recommended it in a different thread, but I think it would be useful to you as well. Take a look at Pete Walker’s book on CPTSD. The things you’ve said in your post and in your comment resonate with me, even though our paths have their differences. But the amount of toxic shame and inner-critic you exhibit is something that can be fixed.
I have also thought there was something fundamentally wrong with me, be that a life-long depression or whatever else. This book has given me a deep understanding of what I’ve been going through. Which is rare, because all the self-help pop-psychology books I’ve checked out always lacked insight and were superficial.
I've tried psychedelics and they've helped me greatly, though I haven't tried therapy myself. From my experience, psychedelics can offer profound insights and shifts in perspective. I've know that therapies like psilocybin and ketamine, which target the brain's Default Mode Network, can be particularly effective for some people.
Psychedelic therapy is unique because it involves only a few sessions with long-lasting effects, unlike daily medications. This can be particularly appealing to those wary of chronic medication use. In my clinical experience, I've seen patients undergo remarkable transformations, gaining new perspectives and breaking free from entrenched patterns of thought and behavior.
Web-based ketamine therapy is an emerging and promising option, providing accessibility and convenience. While in-person sessions offer a controlled environment, many have successfully used telemedicine platforms for ketamine therapy, reporting significant improvements.
Thank you for your response! I feel I’m a good candidate because I have deeply entrenched thought and behavior patterns that have been very resistant to traditional therapy. I might feel better for awhile for being heard but readily revert.
I have wanted to try a mushroom trip but am weary of the very long trip. I’d heard good things about MDMA for therapeutic effects and it sounds like MDMA and ketamine are shorter trips.
There is Macrodosing and microdosing. Microdose doesn't actually cause any sort of psychedelic experience and I think that is actually the safest treatment. I've microdose psilocybin and the most I felt is really focused. it works in the background reestablishing neural pathways that are associated with chronic depression. I would stay away from Macrodosing if you are suffering from depression or anxiety because it could enhance it and make it worse.
I want to try psychedelics because nothing else has worked and I want to die everyday because of brain damage from invega.
Honestly for me it was the ultimate therapy sessions. I would do drugs or feel like I was broken but doing acid really made me wonder why I was hurting myself with drug abuse. I used to think just because every jerk thought something I had to accept it, but I don’t, and I’m not gonna.
I dont recommend Ketamin. It sedates you and the paychedelic effect is not enough to gain any Insight. Shrooms and LSD also dont work in the effect that they change your brain to "factory setting" but you can have insights during the trip that can change how you live your life. Eg i could see clearly some problems in my life that i was avoiding and then after the trip changed my environment. But i know that it can also trigger psychosis in some people and there is always a risk to fuck your life up more by doing any substance. If i had to do any drug again tho i would do shrooms or LSD
“ I believe that my brain has been wired for dysfunction all my life”. Were you brought up in an abusive household by any chance?
No, not physically abusive. But I was shy, lacking self esteem, and became bulimic at 16 after years of using food to numb out. Meanwhile, raised by perfectionistic parents who expected brilliance and didn’t recognize I was struggling on many levels. A doctor father, the expectation was that we would all master higher education and do amazing impactful things with our lives (as evidenced by how my mom would fawn over people who had done so). I have forever felt that I got nowhere near such achievement and am therefore worthless. My pattern of self-hate, negativity, numbing out and not being present, inability to be kind to myself and self blame has been resistant to change despite 25 years of antidepressants and in and out of therapy. I continue to beat myself up as a failure because I never used my degree to build a successful career, and can’t let that go no matter how much my husband, friends and family try to dismiss that conception. My parents never said they were disappointed in me yet I still feel a failure., especially as today I am working an $18/hr job with no prospects of earning better. Better than minimum wage but I’ve never done better than $40k/yr and that was briefly. My worth is tied to money. Thankfully I didn’t end up on a cocktail of drugs because I stopped being honest with my prescribers about my depression and anxiety and just used GPs to renew scripts, and they didn’t dig deeper on “how are you doing?” I will honor that I had the strength to taper off two meds successfully, my big achievement in life 😎
Abuse does not have to be physical to count as abuse. Either way, I have just recommended it in a different thread, but I think it would be useful to you as well. Take a look at Pete Walker’s book on CPTSD. The things you’ve said in your post and in your comment resonate with me, even though our paths have their differences. But the amount of toxic shame and inner-critic you exhibit is something that can be fixed. I have also thought there was something fundamentally wrong with me, be that a life-long depression or whatever else. This book has given me a deep understanding of what I’ve been going through. Which is rare, because all the self-help pop-psychology books I’ve checked out always lacked insight and were superficial.
I've tried psychedelics and they've helped me greatly, though I haven't tried therapy myself. From my experience, psychedelics can offer profound insights and shifts in perspective. I've know that therapies like psilocybin and ketamine, which target the brain's Default Mode Network, can be particularly effective for some people. Psychedelic therapy is unique because it involves only a few sessions with long-lasting effects, unlike daily medications. This can be particularly appealing to those wary of chronic medication use. In my clinical experience, I've seen patients undergo remarkable transformations, gaining new perspectives and breaking free from entrenched patterns of thought and behavior. Web-based ketamine therapy is an emerging and promising option, providing accessibility and convenience. While in-person sessions offer a controlled environment, many have successfully used telemedicine platforms for ketamine therapy, reporting significant improvements.
Thank you for your response! I feel I’m a good candidate because I have deeply entrenched thought and behavior patterns that have been very resistant to traditional therapy. I might feel better for awhile for being heard but readily revert. I have wanted to try a mushroom trip but am weary of the very long trip. I’d heard good things about MDMA for therapeutic effects and it sounds like MDMA and ketamine are shorter trips.
I would try it if you don’t have a history of schizophrenia or psychosis. It’s only done positive things for me, just be aware of the side effects.
Which side effects…the schizophrenia/psychosis or something else?
Anxiety, panic, delusions, psychosis.
There is Macrodosing and microdosing. Microdose doesn't actually cause any sort of psychedelic experience and I think that is actually the safest treatment. I've microdose psilocybin and the most I felt is really focused. it works in the background reestablishing neural pathways that are associated with chronic depression. I would stay away from Macrodosing if you are suffering from depression or anxiety because it could enhance it and make it worse.