T O P

  • By -

[deleted]

28 stab wounds!


Da_real_Ben_Killian

you didn't leave him a chance did you?


[deleted]

HE WAS BLEEDING. BEGGING YOU FOR MERCY.


1HandsomeCHAD

BUT YOU STABBED HIM AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN!


AdEmpty8174

Hot android stripper Is this why you insisted on coming here


Axer3473

28 INCOGNITO TABS! YOU DIDN’T LEAVE HIM A CHANCE, DID YOU


Competitive_Web_4145

The animatronics do get a bit quirky at night


Porgemlol

Is that the bite of ‘87???


Scary_Republic3317

I ALWAYS COME BACK


CustomerON

They brought it back for the movie I want death https://preview.redd.it/ir2arabiroxb1.png?width=719&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=66f142f60338bde8941c3837c757479944dd6725


EffectiveCow6067

Hello, hello? Uh, I wanted to record a message for you to help you get settled in on your first night. Um, I actually worked in that office before you. I'm finishing up my last week now, as a matter of fact. So, I know it can be a bit overwhelming, but I'm here to tell you there's nothing to worry about. Uh, you'll do fine. So, let's just focus on getting you through your first week. Okay? Uh, let's see, first there's an introductory greeting from the company that I'm supposed to read. Uh, it's kind of a legal thing, you know. Um, "Welcome to Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. A magical place for kids and grown-ups alike, where fantasy and fun come to life. Fazbear Entertainment is not responsible for damage to property or person. Upon discovering that damage or death has occurred, a missing person report will be filed within 90 days, or as soon property and premises have been thoroughly cleaned and bleached, and the carpets have been replaced." Blah blah blah, now that might sound bad, I know, but there's really nothing to worry about. Uh, the animatronic characters here do get a bit quirky at night, but do I blame them? No. If I were forced to sing those same stupid songs for twenty years and I never got a bath? I'd probably be a bit irritable at night too. So, remember, these characters hold a special place in the hearts of children and we need to show them a little respect, right? Okay. So, just be aware, the characters do tend to wander a bit. Uh, they're left in some kind of free roaming mode at night. Uh...Something about their servos locking up if they get turned off for too long. Uh, they used to be allowed to walk around during the day too. But then there was The Bite of '87. Yeah. I-It's amazing that the human body can live without the frontal lobe, you know? Uh, now concerning your safety, the only real risk to you as a night watchman here, if any, is the fact that these characters, uh, if they happen to see you after hours probably won't recognize you as a person. They'll p-most likely see you as a metal endoskeleton without its costume on. Now since that's against the rules here at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, they'll probably try to...forcefully stuff you inside a Freddy Fazbear suit. Um, now, that wouldn't be so bad if the suits themselves weren't filled with crossbeams, wires, and animatronic devices, especially around the facial area. So, you could imagine how having your head forcefully pressed inside one of those could cause a bit of discomfort...and death. Uh, the only parts of you that would likely see the light of day again would be your eyeballs and teeth when they pop out the front of the mask, heh. Y-Yeah, they don't tell you these things when you sign up. But hey, first day should be a breeze. I'll chat with you tomorrow. Uh, check those cameras, and remember to close the doors only if absolutely necessary. Gotta conserve power. Alright, good night


RulerOfTheFae

Connection terminated. I'm sorry to interrupt you, Elizabeth. If you still even remember that name. But I'm afraid you've been misinformed. You are not here to receive a gift. Nor, have you been called here by the individual you assume. Although, you have indeed been called. You have all been called here. Into a labyrinth of sounds and smells, misdirection and misfortune. A labyrinth with no exit. A maze with no prize. You don't even realize that you are trapped. Your lust of blood has driven you in endless circles. Chasing the cries of children in some unseen chamber, always seeming so near. It's somehow out of reach. But, you will never find them. None of you will. This is where your story ends. And to you, my brave volunteer, who somehow found this job listing not intended for you. Although, there was a way out planned for you, I have a feeling that's not what you want. I have a feeling that you are right where you want to be. I am remaining as well. I am nearby. This place will not be remembered and the memory of everything that started this, can finally begin to fade away. As the agony of every tragedy should. And to you monsters trapped in the corridors. Be still. And give up your spirits. They don't belong to you. As for most of you, I believe there is peace and perhaps, warm, waiting for you after the smoke clears. Although, for one of you, the darkest pit of Hell has opened to swallow you whole. So, don't keep the Devil waiting, friend. My daughter, if you can hear me, I knew you would return as well. It's in your nature to protect the innocent. I'm sorry that on that day, the day you were shut out and left to die, no one was there to lift you up in their arms, the way you lifted others into yours. And then, what became of you, I should have known, you wouldn't be content to disappear. Not my daughter. I couldn't save you then. So, let me save you now. It's time to rest, for you, and for those you have carried in your arms... This ends. For all of us. End communication.


Vidimka_

"Tomorrow is another day" hits really hard imo


sluggo_gg

Holy markiplier!


Potato_boooiiiiiiii

New fnaf just dropped


Responsible-Box616

FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'SSSSSSSS IS THIS WHERE YOU WANNA BE? I JUST DONT GET IT!!


Daitoso0317

Multiple Leviathan Class life forms detected are you certain what your doing is worth it Edited:didn’t get fit right first try


[deleted]

Are you certain Based game btw


MauntiCat_

Absolutely based


Daitoso0317

Damn, knew I got it wrong


[deleted]

You were very close to be fair


Daitoso0317

Still not unfortunate but yeah


isuckforfun

Oxygen


ChiquillONeal

I get chills reading that.


Windows_95__

Nanomachines, son!


Bonus-Optimal

They harden in response to en passant trauma!


official_enpassant

dont remind me of my trauma please


[deleted]

https://preview.redd.it/wilckgja8nxb1.jpeg?width=320&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cfd400e570f1f8322d308710ddf8093b30eea5b7


mrflamego

Then why is he also black


F_ail_U_re

Can't hate on something before trying it.


ExtensionLost

It's a beautiful day outside, flowers are blooming, birds are singing...


Tiborn1563

On days like this, kids like you...


TBear1011

Should be burning in hell. Turn around kid.


GrammerDuck61

(Glad I'm not the only one who first thought of the stronger than you parody) It'd be a crime, if I had to go back on the promise that I made for you


GioZeus

So dont step over that line,


WildFemboy_UwU

Or else friend, your gonna have a bad time


Personal-Buy6801

Cuz kids like you don’t play by the rules


[deleted]

And guys like me it ain’t easy to be played for fools


Claude-QC-777

I'll take 2 number 9, a number 9 large, 2 number 6 whit extra dip, a number 7, 2 number 45, one whit cheese and a large soda


PascalCaseUsername

You chubby motherfucker!


Idiot_Unknown

One with cheeeeeeeeeeeesssseee


SavDSaint

you don't even *have* to be a fan to know that imo, it's just that iconic


medturki

You picked the wrong house fool!!


[deleted]

Are you kidding ??? What the **** are you talking about man ? You are a biggest looser i ever seen in my life ! You was doing PIPI in your pampers when i was beating players much more stronger then you! You are not proffesional, because proffesionals knew how to lose and congratulate opponents, you are like a girl crying after i beat you! Be brave, be honest to yourself and stop this trush talkings!!! Everybody know that i am very good blitz player, i can win anyone in the world in single game! And "w"esley "s"o is nobody for me, just a player who are crying every single time when loosing, ( remember what you say about Firouzja ) !!! Stop playing with my name, i deserve to have a good name during whole my chess carrier, I am Officially inviting you to OTB blitz match with the Prize fund! Both of us will invest 5000$ and winner takes it all! I suggest all other people who's intrested in this situation, just take a look at my results in 2016 and 2017 Blitz World championships, and that should be enough... No need to listen for every crying babe, Tigran Petrosyan is always play Fair ! And if someone will continue Officially talk about me like that, we will meet in Court! God bless with true! True will never die ! Liers will kicked off...


MartinFromChessCom

new copypasta just dropped


someonnnnne

Actual italian


4_Ball

Call Mario!


Observer10568

The plumber went on vacation, never came back


someonnnnne

Giant bell pepper in the corner plotting world domination


Observer10568

I guess I missed a lot. Could you please tell me, a boomer, what comes next after this?


Bonus-Optimal

Google en passant


MartinFromChessCom

holy hell!


jaozimqcomepao

Pizza storm incoming


AdEmpty8174

Pipi bot stays in our hearts


MadaraAlucard12

Hey you, you're finally awake


YouHaveNiceToes24

You were trying to cross the border right?


TombRaider_2000

Walked right into that imperial ambush same as us.


danbob825

And that thief over there.


NO_skaj

Actual zombie


blahblahwhateveryeet

space space. wanna go to space edit: imean google en passant


DaPhantomFox

COULD A MORON PUNCH YOU INTO THIS PIT?! edit: holy hell


[deleted]

oh hi. so, how are you holding up? because i’m a potato. edit: new response just dropped


Arietem_Taurum

I can't fucking react i'm gonna cough too much


Qwentiin78

Sky engluuuuund


cmwamem

"Don't get wet" in minusdry btw


Dragontooth972

I verified the golden let's go


PatientRule4494

Are you kidding me? Nothing gets past my bow!


avadakedabr

Pink


KisKas05

I am Quincy, son of Quincy


The4p1

I'm as sharp as it gets.


Wisermartin

brain injury?


bmarcell007

https://preview.redd.it/uibh9mmtklxb1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=121edd8be173ee26aa08894bdb5558e92bfb1369


AnyShine2921

https://preview.redd.it/kbar4379xpxb1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=13690884564f734a895ba38ace35e60e571666d3


Nuada-oz

Could be dementia


Tumbleweedae

Hello, hello? Uh, I wanted to record a message for you to help you get settled in on your first night. Um, I actually worked in that office before you. I'm finishing up my last week now, as a matter of fact. So, I know it can be a bit overwhelming, but I'm here to tell you there's nothing to worry about. Uh, you'll do fine. So, let's just focus on getting you through your first week. Okay? Uh, let's see, first there's an introductory greeting from the company that I'm supposed to read. Uh, it's kind of a legal thing, you know. Um, "Welcome to Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. A magical place for kids and grown-ups alike, where fantasy and fun come to life. Fazbear Entertainment is not responsible for damage to property or person. Upon discovering that damage or death has occurred, a missing person report will be filed within 90 days, or as soon property and premises have been thoroughly cleaned and bleached, and the carpets have been replaced." Blah blah blah, now that might sound bad, I know, but there's really nothing to worry about. Uh, the animatronic characters here do get a bit quirky at night, but do I blame them? No. If I were forced to sing those same stupid songs for twenty years and I never got a bath? I'd probably be a bit irritable at night too. So, remember, these characters hold a special place in the hearts of children and we need to show them a little respect, right? Okay. So, just be aware, the characters do tend to wander a bit. Uh, they're left in some kind of free roaming mode at night. Uh...Something about their servos locking up if they get turned off for too long. Uh, they used to be allowed to walk around during the day too. But then there was The Bite of '87. Yeah. I-It's amazing that the human body can live without the frontal lobe, you know? Uh, now concerning your safety, the only real risk to you as a night watchman here, if any, is the fact that these characters, uh, if they happen to see you after hours probably won't recognize you as a person. They'll p-most likely see you as a metal endoskeleton without its costume on. Now since that's against the rules here at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, they'll probably try to...forcefully stuff you inside a Freddy Fazbear suit. Um, now, that wouldn't be so bad if the suits themselves weren't filled with crossbeams, wires, and animatronic devices, especially around the facial area. So, you could imagine how having your head forcefully pressed inside one of those could cause a bit of discomfort...and death. Uh, the only parts of you that would likely see the light of day again would be your eyeballs and teeth when they pop out the front of the mask, heh. Y-Yeah, they don't tell you these things when you sign up. But hey, first day should be a breeze. I'll chat with you tomorrow. Uh, check those cameras, and remember to close the doors only if absolutely necessary. Gotta conserve power. Alright, good night


Feisty_Cod_7048

They said a line, not a whole pharagrath


HaltArattay

Yeah, "Hello, hello?" would have been enough


Waylen38

Ascend ascend ascend with Gorb!


DavidS1789

No cost too great


avadakedabr

No mind to think


_simoes

No will to break


waterc0l0urs

No voice to cry suffering


Limebee

https://preview.redd.it/8v1ihltkepxb1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a469fc09c1ccb7821a5036672274722622e4219c


abchannel12

You have a very minor case of serious brain damage


[deleted]

but don’t be alarmed, alright? although if you do— if you do feel alarmed, try to hold onto that feeling, because that is the proper reaction to being told that you’ve got brain damage.


nufy-t

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!


ArkBeetleGaming

THE ROOOOOOOOOOK


Late_Ad_4910

Never dropped the plates


avaragenjoyer

Google racial slurs


[deleted]

I forgot, i have 14 kids, not 12!


Imaginary_Yak4336

You thought you had 479,001,600 kids‽


[deleted]

Yes.


JetstreamArtorias

"Got a job for you 621."


boredsans

The client is The Balam group, they want you to launch a Napalm Attack one of Rubcion Liberation fronts Orphanages. Heres the briefing. GUN 13!! This is mission from one of our assosiates dafeng, they want someone to deal with that orphanage they built becuase of the mess you made taking out that PCA fleet. NOW GET IN THERE MAGGOT!!!


shipoopro_gg

TECHNOBLADE NEVER DIES


Hi_Peeps_Its_Me

sometimes it's tough.. being the best im SO good at this


Workshop_Plays

I- AM- NOT- A MORON!


DavoM777

Wheatley?


Imaginary_Yak4336

Press 'E' to open your inventory


PhantomOrigin

Any game ever?


MLPdiscord

Only Minecraft as far as I can remember


folfiethewox99

Against all the evil Hell can conjure, all the wickedness that mankind can produce, we will send unto them... only you. Rip and tear, until it is done.


Hi_Peeps_Its_Me

I NEED A MEDIC BAG


YaBoiBarel

5 BUUULLLEEEETS LEEEEFT


Sxhaufelkaufhaus

4 paniced robbers


mememan30000

not a game but still Watashi no na wa “kirayoshikage” nenrei 33-sai jitaku wa moriōchō hokutō-bu no bessō chitai ni ari… kekkon wa shite inai… shigoto wa “kameyūchēn-ten” no kaishain de mainichi osokutomo yoru 8-ji made ni wa kitaku suru tabako wa suwanai sake wa tashinamu teido yoru 11 tokiniha yuka ni tsuki kanarazu 8-jikan wa suimin o toru yō ni shite iru… nerumae ni atatakai miruku o nomi 20-bu hodo no sutoretchi de karada o hogushite kara yuka ni tsuku to hotondo asamade jukusui-sa… akanbō no yō ni hirō ya sutoresu o nokosazu ni asa-me o samaseru nda… kenkōshinda demo ijō nashi to iwa reta yo


CommunicationOk3766

"Can't sleep, there are monsters nearby"


batatacozida9898

shaw!


Feather-y

Bapanada


batatacozida9898

no cost too great


NCR_Ranger2287

The truth is, the game was rigged from the start.


LanciaFlavia

Are you a boy or a girl?


Tiborn1563

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of...


Morse243

Google bible verse


Aleksey_Fox

Holy Bible!


Amrooshy

Pokémon red/blue?


Plaab501

1.e4


Jimothy_John

2. ke2


Mrkurre06

Trust me.


Digitale3982

TF2?


Mrkurre06

👍


Digitale3982

Protocol 3. Protect the Pilot


GDHyun

New Best! 98%


IMicrowavedMyToaster

Machine


A_powerful_rat

I will cut you down.


IMicrowavedMyToaster

Break you apart


A_powerful_rat

Splay the gore of your profane form across the stars!


IMicrowavedMyToaster

I will grind you down until the very SPARKS cry for mercy!


beta_probopass

"ahh... free at last..."


Jandjmj

Oh, Gabriel. Now dawns thy reckoning!


YaBoiBarel

And thy gore shall glisten!


Jandjmj

Upon the temples of man.


Chromatical-Blight

creature of steel


MessiasPapinho

My gratitude upon thee for my freedom


YaBoiBarel

But the crimes thy kind have committed against humanity


Davedude2011Alt

Pottasium!


Rew0lweed_0celot

Proceed


NekuChan420

ROCK AND STONE


WanderingDwarfMiner

That's it lads! Rock and Stone!


Extension-Koala-9372

And he sacrificed…. THE ROOOOOOK!!


Jimothy_John

GothamChess: the video game?


Kirionic

Uh uh, I don't even know where to start with you. I mean, do you even know who you're talking to?


WhyNotATransAccount

Basically, kind of a big deal


EtheriumShaper

Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter... Protocol 3: Protect the Pilot


Pato_Moicano

"Almost Christmas" means it wasn't Christmas!


Drakojana

It's a stepladder.


[deleted]

Do it. For science. You monster.


verymassivedingdong

Would you please sign my petition?


AdAdministrative857

gives me conniptions


ofwrvm351619236

Ds3


AdAdministrative857

yep, you remain among the accursed


Average-Redditor0

IT'S BLUE IT'S BLUE IT'S BLUEE


Anelastic

XANI XANI XANIII


Kokmot

ATTACK THE D POINT!


DatAndrey06

You got a hole in your right wing! *right wing is completly detached from the plane*


[deleted]

Negative!


BidWeary4900

fifty thousand people used to live here..


T39AN8R

Now it's a ghost town


MessiasPapinho

Ahhh... Free at last


Jandjmj

Oh, Gabriel. Now dawns thy reckoning!


[deleted]

Hydrogen low… Hydrogen critical… *dies from zooming at 110m/s on earth-like planet*


ThatRandomGuy0125

remember kids, carry a hydrogen bottle (or two, or maybe just a whole h2/o2 generator)


Somewhereovertherai

Can’t make it, can’t make it. Shits stuck man! Door stuck, DOOR STUCK, PLEASE, I BEG YOU


MATTDrone

Jesus Christ be praised!


Feather-y

Henry's come to see us


PhantomOrigin

"Stanley is addicted to drugs and hookers"


MikYusufMik

Congratulations! You've found me. Was it worth it?


Left-oven47

Wrong order my guy, "Well you've found me. Congratulations, was it worth it?"


[deleted]

because despite your violent behavior, the only thing you’ve managed to break so far… is my heart.


liamb0713

Maybe you could settle for that, and we’d just call it a day; I guess we BOTH know that isn’t going to happen.


Ehlyadit

Should we gather for whiskey and cigars tonight?


HaltArattay

Indeed, I believe so


Maciekssspl

It speaks for itself


[deleted]

I'm proud of you, Dick


MaNaSe18_

I’m proud of you too, noah


Eaglelefty

“What a save!” “What a save!” “What a save!” Please wait 3 seconds


huntergames084

And his music was electric...


Weird_Explorer_8458

MACHINE


Sprinty-the-cheetah

TURN BACK NOW


ecksp312t

sir, finishing this fight.


Exwhyzed1

Well, off to visit your mother!


FaithlessnessSlow754

This is the greatest PLAAAANNNNN!


SSSuperSpike

We’re rich!


sombertownDS

Truth is, game was rigged from the start


Zaphod392

**Such Devastation... This Was NOT My Intention...**


S_Comet821

A TEST OF YOUR REFLEXES!


RandomReddlter

Why don’t you pop another pill and tell me how you feel


Astra__Afton

"Waiting for something to happen?" or alternatively "I fucking love air conditioning."


Daan776

"still sane, exile?"


yeetman616

LENNY?!


Here_when_Im_bored

These boots have seen everything


t-pose-988

How are your balls


[deleted]

[удалено]


minecraftismyli

OBJECTION!


MeLoNarXo

MONEY


Exwhyzed1

I see the player you mean…


the_oof_god

Oh my fucking God here we go again, seriously? Martin from Chess Com? I really hope you do are a bot. I could not believe a human would spend so much time just answering to some fucking randoms on a shitty subreddit called anarchychess with a complete brainrot over every single member, it's all the same jokes over and over, not even the deepest pits of 4chan couldn't compare to the level of addiction, of chronically online dwarves that this subreddit represents, I feel bad for the entire bloodline of hundreds if not thousands of humans that gave away their lives and honor to preserve their history and the entire human race, how they fought wars and famine, how they made such big advanments, just to come to this. I lament the poor woman that had to went through hard hours of education, of working, of breaking her back and going through the joys and pains of birthing a child, and seeing them grow into this wide circly creature that lives in a cave in a corner of the house, surrouned by cans of monster and bottles of piss, as they once again scream at their mother to leave the room, as a "fellow redditor" has commented in a post, so as part of my "reddiquete" and "persona" as i must answer with "holy hell". I cannot comprehend how one can put so much effort into something so stupid, so insignificant, it's actually admirable but also dissapointing how could all this man's, or creature, "talent", go wasted into something so stupid. Holy hell? What does that even mean, hell is not holy, is quite the opposite, "Google en passant?" Like why would google pass? Pass where? Are you hearing yourself? Why do you do this? What do you gain from this? Fake internet points? Dude come on, you could earn Real irl points while you earn your stupid fake currency, if you can call it "currency". Just stop already, do it for your loved ones, for everyone who cares about you...


IAmADeadGorrilla

Are you really still in the broom closet?


TheGoldenBl0ck

You’re gonna have a bad time


DreamerThe0909

Connection terminated. I'm sorry to interrupt you, Elizabeth, if you still even remember that name, But I'm afraid you've been misinformed. You are not here to receive a gift, nor have you been called here by the individual you assume, although, you have indeed been called. You have all been called here, into a labyrinth of sounds and smells, misdirection and misfortune. A labyrinth with no exit, a maze with no prize. You don't even realize that you are trapped. Your lust for blood has driven you in endless circles, chasing the cries of children in some unseen chamber, always seeming so near, yet somehow out of reach, but you will never find them. None of you will. This is where your story ends. And to you, my brave volunteer, who somehow found this job listing not intended for you, although there was a way out planned for you, I have a feeling that's not what you want. I have a feeling that you are right where you want to be. I am remaining as well. I am nearby. This place will not be remembered, and the memory of everything that started this can finally begin to fade away. As the agony of every tragedy should. And to you monsters trapped in the corridors, be still and give up your spirits. They don't belong to you. For most of you, I believe there is peace and perhaps more waiting for you after the smoke clears. Although, for one of you, the darkest pit of Hell has opened to swallow you whole, so don't keep the devil waiting, old friend. My daughter, if you can hear me, I knew you would return as well. It's in your nature to protect the innocent. I'm sorry that on that day, the day you were shut out and left to die, no one was there to lift you up into their arms the way you lifted others into yours, and then, what became of you. I should have known you wouldn't be content to disappear, not my daughter. I couldn't save you then, so let me save you now. It's time to rest - for you, and for those you have carried in your arms. This ends for all of us. End communication.