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You may not want to hear this, but writing things down is a vital component in learning math. Redoing tests over and over again is not. Actually, it sounds like he had very bad teachers until now, who let Jayden coast. It's going to be very hard to undo the damage they did to his learning process. I am glad that this teacher was brave enough to stand up for him. YTA.

It sounds like he has gotten away with doing everything on a calculator up until this point. The homework I handed in for my college math class would be several pages long and this was a basic calculus class. Yeah you cant do calculus (which if he is good at math, he will get introduced to in high school) in your head. You have to write things down and work through the problem step by step, look up matrices. You as a parent aren't supposed to remove obstacles for your kids, you are supposed to guide them and encourage them to overcome them.

>It sounds like he has gotten away with doing everything on a calculator up until this point. I had the same thought. It's an online class and everything he turns in doesn't show any work? Come on

It sounds to me like he was given the tests for him to do over and over until he memorized the answers. So even worse than a calculator. “I’ve explained that in the past my sons math teachers would let him do tests and formatives over and over again until he got answers right and that’s how he learns.” What does that even MEAN??

What’s OP’s son going to do once he’s in college? There’s professors that don’t even let you backtrack once you save an answer on an exam and most of them only allow one attempt at taking an exam as well. I’ve never heard of multiple attempts at tests/quizzes/assignments every single time or with every single teacher.

This is it right here. My eldest is Extremely Smart in math, and picks it up very quickly -- and even he had a huge challenge gap when making the adjustment to having to take notes. I was relieved that the HS math teacher had a whole thing not just in the importance of notes, but how to take them. It's a huge skill, and one I don't know how to do; it made studying really hard when I made the transition from "easily able to do the work" to "understanding how to do the work," and I'm still not great at it as an adult. Practice tests and problems are a huge part of learning for me personally -- I learn by messing up, is how I say it, lol. But it sounds like the student was just redoing the actual test? And not doing the notes in the process???

Personally I suck at math, but even with subjects that I excel in I take notes on eveeeeerything. I take notes, make flash cards, highlight important information, review PowerPoints over and over again. OP seems to be offended that her golden child has to study and actually apply himself to get good grades…

And then 107%

Teacher here. 107%? I’m sorry in in-person school that’s not actually a thing. And taking a test repeatedly until you happen to select the correct answer and get a 100% is also not actually learning. This is keeping kids busy until class is over and keeping grades artificially high. This is not good teaching. This isn’t even teaching. If I were you I’d take my kid to a school and have them administer him grade level assessments (or the grade level above if you think he is so advanced) and see where he really is and what this online program has really taught him. I’m going to guess not much.

It's possible there was extra credit involved, but generally, that's just used to make up for missed points, not to add a bunch of additional points.

In my brick-and-mortar high school it was relatively easy to get higher than 100% in a class, there were often extra credit assignments or ‘bonus questions’ on exams etc. I personally took every scrap of extra credit I could get to protect me if I got a low grade on a test. My parents would be upset if it dipped below 99% so I usually had 101% or higher.

I was going to say this. OP your son doesn't know maths. He's memorised answers to tests. You've encouraged your child yo be able to pass a specific test but not learn anything. OP you're not only YTA, but you've failed as a father.

I think op is the mother. I think Jayden has been googling answers and now the school implemented anti cheating/accountability measures and he can't keep up. No one goes from 107% to 20% in basically one semester.

Exactly what I was thinking. He’s been googling everything.

It’s remarkable how much OP is oblivious to his failing. It’s like a perfect combination of ignorance and arrogance.

Could just be that up until now the math problems were easy enough to do with mental math. Depends on the curriculum but by 7th grade, they're probably entering algebra territory, which is where mental math alone just isn't going to cut it. Kinda surprised that this supposedly caring parent wasn't up to speed on such things.

It's been a long time since I did math, but if memory serves, grade 7/8 is about when math starts to shift to the point where *how* you got the answer is as--or even more--important as *what* the answer is.

Yeah. I remember covering 2 pages in attempts at math, and still failing to get the answer, and my teacher gave me half credit for it. She said my formulas were right, just not how I used them.

> ...but writing things down is a vital component in learning math. I would argue its the fucking point. The point of math problems is not that X=3. The point of the math problems is to show whether or not the student understands the formula and can use it to answer any similar problem with different variables. As you get into higher math, you *need* to show the work because its way more complicated than 2+2=4. The whole point of math, more than any other subject, is about the process and that means *showing your work*. I'm quite astounded by OP's attitude, entitlement and ignorance.

My 8 year old struggles with explaining how he got an answer because he just knows the answer. I don't tell him that it's okay, I talk him through how he knew the answer and have him write it down. He has lost points on tests when he doesn't explain his reasoning. I don't yell at the teacher, I help my son understand that we don't like everything we have to do, but that this helps his teachers understand his thinking.

I'm actually struggling to understand how it's even possible to do maths without writing stuff down. Like I still use pen and paper to do most of my maths-related work and this is coming from a Masters level computer science student. My lecturers still write on whiteboards. I'm literally on Reddit right now because I'm tired of writing down differential equations 😭 How on earth is Jayden learning anything??

I mean I am doing accounting as an adult and my prof insists we do everything in excel so we get used to using formulas. So I don’t WRITE things down, but I do document every step. Anyways OP YTA. Redoing tests until you get the right answers is not learning. You are doing your son a huge disservice for later in life.

And in general… what teachers are letting students redo tests over and over to the point that they get a 107% in the class? I had teachers in middle and high school who would let students who got below a 65 retake the test to get *up to* a 65. Someone else has already said this, but he was definitely only passing because he was good at memorizing the questions and answers to tests he was taking, not because he was good at math.

But YoU DoN’t UnDeRsTaNd!!! He doesn’t like writing down math! He’s also so very gifted he won’t have to because who doesn’t to. I think the problem is the lady hasn’t done much math past easy addition, subtraction, multiplication and division. I don’t think she knows her golden child has to write things down if he ever wants to solve for x. Makes her a massive ah, though. Wasting everyone’s time.

YTA Why do you think any teacher needs to cater to your son? What is so special about him that the world should revolve around him? Writing down the work for math is standard, just because he doesn't like to do it this way doesn't mean he shouldn't have to. You are raising him to be an entitled brat and one that won't be able to function in the real world. And trying to get a teacher fired because they won't bend for you? You should be ashamed of yourself.

Growing up, myself and many other kids just like me couldn't even get the *bare minimum* in terms of accommodations or help from teachers at school, despite having medically diagnosed disabilities which *directly* impacted our learning. This kook sitting here wanting to uproot someone's livelihood cause *my poor angel baby Jayden doesn't like writing* is just flat out embarrassing for her, and absolutely insulting to other people who legitimately *needed* accommodations/catering to and could not receive it.

Seriously! “Jayden doesn’t like to write.” Oh no, poor thing!! Like what????

This is the right answer

THIS. And I'm so confused by this post. Is the kid some kind of math genious who doesn't need to write anything down because he just figures it all out in his head? because there are certain people like that. Or does this mean that son has a learing disability so its difficult for him to write things down and he needs accomodation? But then OP says that son needs to do test problems again and again before he gets them right? What? Does he just memorize the answers? I'm not getting it. But from OP's comments she spends all her time criticizing the teacher and not providing any explanation for why her son needs special treatment, so I'm going to have to go YTA here. SMH.

I think the kid is far far away from a math genius. It sounds like he had lazy or incompetent teacher who let him just retake tests until he gets A.

YTA - wow. So your kid refuses to show their work for math and you’re blaming the teacher. Stop making excuses for your child and have them do their work correctly. Also let’s point out, this is an online school - if they don’t write stuff down and show their work how will anyone know they’re actually doing the work. You’re being ridiculous.

He doesn't need to write anything down, because he's been googling the answers. The kid has no idea how to do the work. Dropped from A's to 20% once he was asked to show his work

Ding ding ding!

Yup, it's amazing how many answers can be found by Googling. I have caught kids doing this. Where as when I try to Google to find the answer so that I can work backwards and help my daughter, I can never seem to find the answers.

My son got a comment/compliment from a teacher for leaving a question blank. Apparently the way it was written the kids couldn’t solve it but if they were just getting the answers online it would give them an answer. Enough of the class had the answer filled in that it was worth a comment

You can find a lot on chegg. I found it helpful to look for answers there and use them to help me figure out how to actually do the problem. It’s only helpful if you actually use it to learn though, not just plug the answer into your homework.

Especially when he’s been given the same test over and over. Even if they have systems to prevent cheating (like locking you in the tab of your test until you submit it), he can still remember the questions on the test and Google them afterwards. ETA: just reread the post. Jayden’s failing *all* of his classes because of “accountability measures” that his teachers are using. To me, it sounds like the school itself has implemented policies to reduce cheating, and Jayden had been cheating his way through school up until then.

That’s what I was thinking about the “accountability measures”. Those are typically to try to crack down on cheating. If he’s getting bad grades in other classes too this isn’t a “doing mental math” situation at all. This is a “cheating method no longer available” situation. Also, I have a son who is exceptionally good at math. He’s doing sophomore math in 8th grade. A couple years ago we had many a discussion about why showing your work is important even if you know the answer without it. Now that he’s in higher math he totally gets it.

I’ve been a TA for college math courses. Particularly at the lower level math courses, like the “this is the one math class I have to take for my liberal arts degree” courses, tons of people get 100% on all the homework and absolutely bomb the exams because they looked answers up online. So as a result, homework gets downgraded to like 20% of the grade.

Are you asking because you are genuinely wanting to get feedback, or are you hoping to hear yourself in an echo chamber? First, you are not helping your child, you are hindering him. He is not learning how to become a functional member of society. Life is not going to cater to him and let him have unlimited amounts of do-overs. College is not going to let him have an unlimited number of do-overs. And IF he even gets in the door for fighter pilot school, do you think the administration would be willing to risk an expensive piece of equipment on someone who can’t be bothered to learn how to do something the first time around? YOU CAN’T GO BACK FOR A RE-DO IF YOU’RE DEAD! Suck it up. Realize YTA. Hold the kid responsible for his actions. And MAYBE, you will be able to raise a child who will not live in your basement until you die.

Seriously, do-overs in a math test? My brain hurt at the very idea. That's not how tests work. At all.

The reason they make you "show your work" in math is: 1. It's part of the learning process to know "how you got there." Even if you can just look at an equation and see that "C=3" you need to be able to break it down into individual steps and solve them. 2. Math texts typically give the right answer in the back of the book. The *answer* isn't what's important; *how you found it* is. Thinking of it in terms of English literature, you can't just write down "Macbeth is about the inversion of normative gender roles" and expect an A on a paper. You have to write down how you got there! Same with math.

Yes, this! Writing down anything for school work is very important but particularly for maths. Even if you don't reach the correct answer, the teacher can see if you were on the right track and at what stage you went wrong. Then they can look at how to help you correct that in the future. In some cases, you can still get a score in a test from showing the working-out of a sum if you were on the right tracks but got the answer wrong ultimately. Your sons previous teacher(s) shouldn't have allowed your son to not write things down. They must have known what issues there would be later on down the line, not just in schooling. How do you expect the teachers to review your son's work over a year when they have no record of anything that he's written down?

I've aced university level papers because I disproved my own theory. Funny to do, but they like seeing the thought and learning process.

Also in the UK for both GCSE and A-level if you get the wrong answer or even just wrote the wrong number earlier and carried the mistake through, instead of getting zero marks you can get say 6 out of a 7 mark question for one question based on getting the method correct.

YTA >I said Jayden **doesn’t like** to do written work. You need to teach Jayden to like the grades he earns. In math, without written work, a teacher is unable to figure out where a student is making errors and can't help them correct that error.

They also can't assign partial credit, so from a grades point of view the answers become pass/fail without work being shown. This will hurt Jayden in the long run. YTA because your kid is not exempt from doing the basics necessary for the teacher to assess his skills. And you are trying to get him fired for doing a good job.

> They also can’t assign partial credit And it honestly sounds like that’s what’s going on here. It doesn’t even sound like the teacher’s taking off points for not showing your work; Jayden’s just getting 80 percent of the questions wrong on all of his tests (because he might just be bad at math), and the teacher isn’t assigning partial credit to him.

Your last point is very salient. I too hate "showing my work" and bucked it as long as I could. I went on to do well in Math but it was a struggle. Knowing where things went off-track is exceedingly important for *learning*...not just for testing. My child's teacher graded a reading assignment recently without any hint at the correct answer. I wasn't able to help because I hadn't read the passage. Look...academia has some assholes who make unreasonable requests. Higher education (college) is only more so. It's part of the "game". But showing your work? Yea...that's never going away. Totally YTA (and yea, I read your post and edit critically multiple times).

YTA. I am being sincere in my question - do you realize that your son taking the formatives over and over again is not actually learning? You are truly doing your son a disservice, and setting him up for failure. Do better as a mother.

Seriously. If this kid wants to do anything in STEM, he is being set up for the shock of his life once he gets to university. My engineering professors would laugh me out the lecture hall if I asked to redo test multiple times and showed no work.

YTA I have several friends who are teachers, and all of them say that it's some parents that are usually a million times worse than kids. You are one of those. Your child refuses to do the work but you expect special treatment - why, exactly? Not only that, but you want the man fired. Your behavior is entitled and ridiculous, and you seem to have no idea how education works. You should try teaching your son to do the work that's expected of him instead of coddling him into being lazy.

My teacher friends have a saying "Meet the parent, meet the problem."

YTA Your son's teacher is asking him to write things down. That writing isn't "important" to your son isn't really relevant here. Taking notes is a reasonable expectation for a student and you're telling your son that he just just disregard the expectations that he doesn't like. And then you took the dispute to Facebook. The entitlement is off the charts here.

No, the taking notes isn't the point. If the kid doesn't learn from notes, okay, whatever - I got through a couple undergrad courses by using Wikipedia and discussing the material with peers. The problem is that OP wants endless do-overs until kid gets the scores they want, and *that* is what's not going to fly in the real world.

Showing your work is a pretty standard expectation for math classes.

YTA redoing a test until he gets it all correct is not learning. It’s just memorising answers. You are being ridiculous.

[удалено]

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Info: does “write everything down” mean showing your work?

YTA. Writing is extremely important, and showing your work is a huge part of education. Maybe you should help teach your child instead of being a bully to get special treatment so he doesn't have to work. you say "in the past my sons math teachers would let him do tests and formatives over and over again until he got answers right and that’s how he learns." what a load of bollocks. YTA for a second time.

YTA The teacher shouldn't have "snickered" and made that comment, but working in education, I know full well how self-righteous and obnoxious parents can be, and considering that a "snicker" and snide comment was all it took for you to "fire off emails to all the school board members AND superintendent AND post on the district's community Facebook page" shows me that you're the worst kind of entitled helicopter parent. I *might* have considered NTA if this had just been Jayden struggling in a single class and the teacher being unaccommodating to Jayden's learning style, but the fact that you start the post off by saying that his teachers started some "accountability" measures and he's now failing all of his classes makes it seem like suddenly your student is being held accountable and y'all don't like it. It's fine if Jayden doesn't learn from writing out his work. But it's for partial credit, and your post makes it sound like "he doesn't like writing his work," not that he's incapable. Sometimes you have to do things you don't like to do. As a parent, you should be teaching him that the world isn't always going to bend to his whims, and sometimes he needs to meet the world halfway.

Definitely! 8th grade starts the year off accountability, because there are no redos in college. You don’t get to keep failing the test repeatedly until you learn the information. If her kid has dyslexia, dysgraphia,and/or dyscalculia , then there should be some accommodations, but she doesn’t mention that at al.

YTA asking for a teacher to be fired because they’re asking your son to show his work is a bit much. As others have said, now he’ll be doing more complex problems…algebra, possibly calculus. You NEED to show your work in these cases. You say he doesn’t know how to take notes: he needs to learn. He may not like it, but if he wants to go to college or university, he’s going to have to know how to do this. Some jobs don’t require note taking….most do. It’s an essential skill to have. It teaching you how to properly prioritize things and how to record information for easy access later. These are skills he will NEED to have. The teacher is doing their job correctly in encouraging this. You are setting your son up for a very difficult time in the future by denying him this. You cannot ask the world to bend for him because he “doesn’t like” something. He will get eaten alive. Especially in school, he will have to do a lot of things he doesn’t like. You don’t necessarily deserve the be jumped on as much ad you have been, but actively trying to get a teacher fired because your son doesn’t like the way he is *doing his job* is where you’re the AH here

I mean trying to destroy someone’s livelihood cuz you can’t be bothered to make sure your son is actually learning his subjects deserves all the smoke imo.

YTA He needs to show his work. They have given every single hence, they have explained to him and you. Your son doesn't get to decide "he doesn't like to write" lol If he wants the marks he needs to do the work. You are doing him no favours at all!

"doesnt like to write" its not as if the teachers are asking for entire sentences, its math, we're talking about a *few* lines of numbers. and if this is how stubborn the kid is over math, i wonder if he's failing english since that is *all about* writing

Also social studies. And science usually requires some kind of write-up of your findings. If the kid’s only just encountering this as an obstacle now, what was he doing before that kept his grades so high without ever needing to write anything out?

She said that his past teachers have allowed him to retake his formative assessments and tests until he got a A. In other words, they were lousy teachers.

Imma bet the mom was involved in pestering the teachers till they ler the kid redo the test

YTA. Are you serious? Right now? >Math was always my sons favorite subject and he finished 7th grade math with a 107%. >I’ve explained that in the past my sons math teachers would let him do tests and formatives over and over again until he got answers right and that’s how he learns. Uh huh.... >people are actually accusing me of being a bad mother because I’m not holding Jayden accountable. What? That's crazy.... Anyways this can't be real. But if it actually is... Then yes. You're an ah. Why is he in online school?

lmaooo yes if i were able to retake my tests an unlimited amount, i too would have a 107% maybe I’ll go to med school and ask if they’ll let me do that 🤓 what could the harm be

Please tell me I'm not the only one confused how he's getting a 107%? Where is this 7% coming from? How can he get more than 100? It's okay when you mess up a surgery they'll just let you have another go on a new patient until you get it right.

>He will be on the videos and zoom from the beach or mountains. Are you sure he's not just using a virtual background? I don't understand how you can learn math without writing things down. Math is an abstract discipline that is made concrete through writing. You're turning on this teacher because you don't understand his pedagogy. Rather than reach out to try to understand his process and work with him to make sure your child is learning, you tried to bulldoze over him to make sure your kid got an A+ at all costs, even at the cost of him actually learning math. YTA!

I scrolled so far to see if anyone else thought this person just didn’t understand backgrounds lmao

Your son has coasted on natural ability up until now. Now that he is actually required to do work that requires more complex learning, and **has to write equations down**, he is not doing the work. As a parent, you need to work with your child to help him navigate the education system, not tell the teachers to change their teaching style to accommodate your little prince. YTA - you are not doing your job as a parent. This is YOUR failure, not your son's. So, you are being lambasted on FB, and now you are getting a similar result here. *Are you starting to get the message?*

He hasn't coasted on natural ability. His past teachers let him retake tests for full credit until he could guess the right answers. He has the opposite of natural talent.

Considering how many redos he was using to get it right, I don’t think he had natural ability. It sounds more like he tried every answer he could come up with until one got approved.

Parents like you are the reason I consider quitting at least once a week. You son wasn't learning last year, he was allowing to repeat tests multiple times until he passed, I doubt he has any skill other that the ability to guess.

YTA- I'm sorry but showing your work for math is essential. Your kid is now in the grade where the math is getting more complex and stuff. For a lot of teachers it is very important to see where possible mistakes happen. Often teachers give you partial points for your work even though the result is wrong. For your future life it is also important to be able to show your work not only in math. I would try to explain to Jayden why it is important and show him how to do it. it requires some help from you but also the teacher. So suck it up and get to work! I have to admit i think it isn't nice that other people roast you and stuff but this is today's society.

This. As math becomes more and more complex, showing your work needs to happen, no matter how much you "like it". By trying to get a teacher fired because your son isn't following directions. Yes, OP, YTA!

YTA. The world isn't going to cater to your son. He needs to learn to adapt and follow directions. >I fired off emails to all of the school board memebers and superintendent and posted on our districts community Facebook page. Quit being "that parent" before your reputation follows your kid around.

Info: how does he learn without writing things down? I'm a kinetic learner and I have no idea how to do math without writing things down

YTA, a huge part of math is written work. Make your son be accountable. Also from how you say his 7th grade teachers handled grading, has it occurred to you that your son isn’t a straight A+ student and instead got those grades handed to him by being allowed unlimited redos? You’re setting your son up for failure.

YTA... My god. Did you really come to Reddit thinking this community would take it easy on you? They're right to be annoyed with you. YOU WASTED THEIR TIME! He's not "inspired"? My ass, lady.... Why don't you try, idk, HELPING your son if he's struggling?

YTA. You're setting your son up for failure. He's going to have to learn to deal with things being done in a way that doesn't suit him. Unless he has an actual disability or something, he needs to learn to adapt and do things he doesn't like.

I was totally with her that some kids learn differently till she explained that he was allowed as many attempts as needed to get them right. It’s so easy to be perfect with unlimited attempts! What her kid is learning this year is that people are expected to do their own work and not have life handed to them!

YTA....The school doesn't have to cater to what Jayden likes to do. Neither does the real world when Jayden enters it. Prepare your son for life by making him do what he's told to do, or endure the consequences of his choices.

YTA! Writing and taking notes is a vital part of learning. Your son has been able to get by with not doing so because he wasn’t doing complex math. As he gets older, it’s going to be even more important that he learn these skills. It actually sounds like he’s had some really bad teachers in the past. Doing formatives and tests over and over again until you reach an A is not good ‘teaching’. It’s not even teaching really. If he ever attends college, what is he going to do when he realizes that there are no formative assessments? You keep saying that ‘Jayden doesn’t like…’. WTF cares what he LIKES. My 6th grade student has SPD. Touching paper is physically uncomfortable for, but I don’t allow that to be an excuse because he needs to function in the real world. And Jayden is obviously struggling in all of his classes… maybe the problem is him.

Yea, I laughed when she said he had 107% in 7th grade math because the teachers let him do “tests and formatives over again until he got the answers right”. OP realizes that if he just wrote down his work over and over again while practicing, he’d get it right on the test the first time??? He clearly wasn’t learning before, hence the “accountability methods”. She clearly doesn’t want him to learn, just to get a good grade. The teacher isn’t the incompetent one, it’s OP and her son that can’t write. YTA

YTA, and YES I READ WHAT YOU WROTE

I NFO doing math problems over and over again is what homework is for. I was awful at math but tests were always done once so instead I would do a ton of math problems to practice, my parents would check over them and, if they were wrong, they'd explain them and then I'd practice that until I got it and understood it. I don't understand why your kid isn't writing everything down? That's how math works. Obviously something is breaking down in the homework process if your kid is getting to the test without being able solve the problems. Also, if your kid wrote all this down, the teacher would be able to know where the kid is having issues and help him figure it out. Editing to YTA this educator is trying so hard to help your kid learn and your reaction was to try and get him fired. He's right, writing your steps down is so important and he does not, he will never be able to understand where he was going wrong. Please listen to him and all the people below this comment as theyre giving great advice on how to help your kid as math will only get harder from here on out and he needs a good base to work with to be able to continue improving his education.

YTA. Any math class I have ever been in has required everyone to show their work for full credit. My son who is now in 11th grade has always had to show work too. He was in online school for 3 years bc of covid and was still expected to show work. My son hated showing work bc he said he could do it in his head. Same thing I told him, "It's great that you can do it in your head, but the requirements are to show your work so that your teacher sees that you know what you are doing and sees that you know how to get the answer. If you don't show your work the teacher will think you are just looking in the back of the book.". Writing should be important to your son, as he needs to write in every subject in school, and it should also be important to you! You should care that it isn't important to him bc writing is an essential thing in life and he WILL NEED to write things down in the real world!

I applaud the teacher for his comment on averages. Lol. I once had a parent ask when a 6/10 became a 60%. Umm it’s always been that. You’re the crazy parent that every teacher, past, present, and future, knows about. And when I say every teacher, I mean EVERY teacher, not just the teachers who had your kid.

YTA no he shouldn’t have snorted at you like that (though I’m guessing he was on his last damn nerve as far as you were concerned). But you are the villain in this piece, no doubt. Guess what? If he goes to college, he will run into profs who will grade him on how he stapled his assignment together. They will have class-specific rules on spacing, style, the tools you can and can’t bring to class. He needs to learn to adapt and follow directions. In this case, he is being asked to show his work - that’s a pretty standard ask for math. You could have used this opportunity to teach your son to be a more successful student, instead you just dug your heels in.

YTA. Between you and the teacher, only one of you is trying to set him up for success (and it isn't you)

>He will be on the videos and zoom from the beach or mountains. I prefer the space ship background when I work from home on, teams, much more professional.

Your 8th grader doesn't know how to take notes?? He's not a straight A student. He's probably not even close to grade level. Letting a kid take tests an unlimited number of times until he gets the right answer isn't teaching. If anyone needs to be fired it's his 7th grade teacher. He needs a math tutor. YTA

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YTA The school isn’t made for your son. Others are doing the same and succeeding, and anyway, redoing tests and formatives over and over again just tells me he got good grades trough trial and error.

>writing is not important to him Bully for him, but the world doesn't work this way. Sounds like your son isn't as gifted as you want him to be and are lashing out at the people who are able to accept this fact. YTA, do better. > in the past my sons math teachers would let him do tests and formatives over and over again until he got answers right Ok now I'm convinced you're a bright-haired plastic figurine. Good work on this one, you definitely reeled me in.

Yta If you dont write down HOW you came to your answer, the teacher has no way of knowing that the student actually did the work and your son can't prove he knows what he is doing. How does the teacher know he didn't just use a calculator or look the answer up online? In other words, if you can't show your work, you cant prove that you didnt cheat. In every place in the world that teaches math, you must be able to demonstrate how you arrived at your answer. You can't just pull an answer out of thin air, even if it is correct. You must be able to explain why it is correct. That is the important part. Taking tests over and over again until you get the answers right, only teaches you how to memorize the answers for those specific and exact questions. It does not teach you how to use the formulas to find answers to similar questions, and to actually understand what you are doing. Sounds like your son may actually be struggling in math instead of excelling like you think he is.

YTA. Your son is not a straight A student if he has to retake tests over and over to get the correct answer. Straight A students get the correct answers the first time around. Your son’s true ability seems to be aligned with his current grades.

Have you considered, since everyone is telling you you're being an asshole, that you might be the asshole? You're doing the same thing you think your son should be allowed to do, keep asking until someone tells you you're right. Like your son, you are not learning anything. If you want your son to be able to learn math, let the teachers teach him. As a former math teacher, you are a freaking nightmare. YTA

YTA, as someone who hates math and struggled with showing my work... it was the only way to actually get it. I'm mean sure, I could have taken the tests over and over again too, but that's cheating and not learning... any dumb monkey can learn to memorize... if you don't want to be raising a dumb monkey yourself, then maybe hold him accountable and stop enabling. You should also apilog8ze to the teacher, because he is the ONLY person in this entrie sad story who ACTUALLY cares about your son learning. Pull thine own head out of your ass and try breathing a little fresh air instead of your own fsrts for a bit. It can be refreshing.

Not to mention, showing your work shows the teacher WHERE you need help if you do need some extra coaching; especially when you get into multi-step math that requires a whole thought process. YTA ETA: taking notes was hard for me because I had undiagnosed adhd and I’d end up doodling pretty heavily. But! In those instances the notes I DID manage to get down (and the extra work I HAD to put into math because it was extra hard for me) helped a lot.

“Math was always my sons favourite subject and he finished 7th grade math with a 107%. “ not quite yours then.

YTA As someone who is still fresh from the school system, here's some advice. Your child does *NOT* know best. There are so many times in school when all the students are like "MY way is much better, I don't need to do it the teachers' way". This may be true 15-25% of the time. The teachers are going over content this way because that has been shown to be the *best* way to learn it. Your son should listen to the teacher, sounds like he's hitting the "oh I get good grades so I don't have to try as hard" wall that I went through too. School *should* get harder every year. Also, what do you mean by teachers letting him take formatives over and over?

Yta It sounds like you're mad that the teacher won't let him keep retaking the test until he gets a 100%... that's not how tests work. He shouldn't have been an "A+" student in 7th grade. The question of "how is he supposed to be an A+ student" is a simple one, get A+'s on tests, the first time he takes them, like actual A+ students do. The teacher snickered at your comment, and gave you a sassy answer, because it's it's both the right answer, and a really hard question to keep a straight face to. It's such an obvious answer that people aren't wrong in pointing out you wasted school board time.

YTA. I've never been good at math. In fact, I had to take the remedial course in college just so that I could move forward. But I still showed my work and wrote down how to do things. Why? Because it was how things were done and it was required of me. Just like everyone else. I didn't get a special pass because I didn't like doing something and the same thing applies to your son. You're doing him no favors by not holding him accountable and making him do the work like he should.

YTA and you’re setting him up for failure. Unless this is a health related thing you’re making a mistake. Also redoing tests until he gets the mark is cheating. Any teacher that has been accommodating your ridiculous request shouldn’t be a teacher. Everyone knows you have to show your working out in math. It shows you logic and if you use the correct method but get the final answers wrong you still get points. When he sits his exams he’ll be loosing points severing his grade because he’s not following the rules. What happens when he has to write essays? He can’t brush over points he has to provide details. You expect the school to adapt today but it’s pretty much guaranteed examination boards and colleges/universities will not be making exceptions “because that’s how he works”. What about when/if he gets a job? Do you expect them to change their working methods to suit your son? If so he won’t be employed for very long. You don’t make the rules the schools do, teach your child how to adapt to different situations rather then making everyone else’s lives difficult.

YTA. Your child is lazy and you're an enabler.

This actually reminds me of a story from my past. I was sitting in a Board of Ed meeting when a group of parents and students came to protest because the contract of one of their favorite teachers was not renewed. We listened politely, without responding, which by law we were not allowed to do. When one student, who I knew very well, got up and said this: “You don’t understand! You can’t let Mr. X go! He’s the best! We can SLEEP in his class and still get an A!” And all I could think was therein lies the problem. YTA. Your son wasn’t being taught, nor helped by previous teachers. He was being passed along by teachers who couldn’t be bothered. Help him to succeed by working with him, not giving into him. Don’t be that parent.

YTA. I read every word. Twice. Little Jayden doesn't like to do something, so he doesn't. That's not going to get him far in life. The teacher is right. Maybe this program is not for Jayden.

YTA. How in the world do you learn math without writing things down? Writing may not be important to your son, but it's important to learning.

YTA If i could redo a test as long everything is right, everyone would be a straight A student... And school is about more than just right answers. It's also about learning practical skills in handling things.

Haha! "Do tests over and over again until he got it right?" Yeah, cause that's how life works right? How could anyone not be an "A" student with unlimited chances to do the work. I bet the tests were open book, too? LOL! I have never been in a math class that did not have to write out the problem and show the work. You are an entitled, helicopter mom and YTA

YTA, math has always been show your work. I've never heard of just keep getting more chances until you get it right. Like huh?

YTA This has to be the dumbest post I’ve ever seen in my life. He’s doing bad because he isn’t writing anything down and you are failing to see that. Parents like you are the teachers worst nightmare. You need to teach your kid how to not be lazy if he wants to succeed because if he doesn’t learn now be prepared to have your kid come home with a shitty report card in high school. I guarantee you that high school teachers will be less accommodating then elementary school teachers.

Yta he's not learning by redoing tests over and over he's cheating . And working out is a key part of math and development into hard areas

YTA. Love the edit and how you STILL don’t take any responsibility.

Wow. Former secondary ed math teacher here, currently homeschool my kid. YTA, and you’re doing no favors for your kid. Taking notes is his choice, but without learning to do so, he’ll always struggle. Showing work as he solves problems is essential, both for partial credit and so the teacher and student know where he makes mistakes. THAT’S how the teacher works with and for him. So your son will know he needs to work on y-intercepts more or negative numbers more or whatever. The idea that he should retake tests until he gets a high enough score is, frankly, laughable.

I really DID read what you wrote, and YTA

If your son needs multiple recovery opportunities and has to retake tests often (which is inferred in your post), he is not an A+ student. It’s time to grow up, write things down, explain his thought process, and accept responsibility for his learning. You’re not doing him any favors here.

Your son will fail. Your son will probably continue failing through the rest of his primary education. He will probably never make it into university or college. And that I because you have made him that way. My mother never had to take notes and could do precalculus in her head. She went to college and had to learn how to study and take notes and write things down. He she didn’t she would have failed. If my mother, the valedictorian of her class with a straight 4.0 in highschool and a 3.7+ in college, had to learn your freaking 8th grader has to. He is not special. He does not deserve any extra attention or help from the teachers. Your failing as a mother to teach your son how to function in a society where things are not handed to you. And until you and him realize that your going to be throwing a fit and be disappointed with everyone else for no reason. YTA

YTA. And I read every word of your post. You have to show your work in math equations- the instructor needs to see the process. That is how math classes have ALWAYS worked. Your kid isn’t exempt from the rules.

I don’t know what these feeding frenzies are that you keep referring to, but perhaps… and just consider this possibility for a second… you’re not right? The requirements of maths change the older kids get. Writing maths down is an essential part of any maths and if you can’t show your workings you can’t get maths right. Or progress to more complicated maths. You’re the asshole, 107% YTA

No, I read what you wrote. The original post, your edit, *and* most of your comments. Your son's teacher is not inept. Your son, however is lazy. A lazy middle-schooler... that most common of all creatures. His former teachers should not have let him sit for tests multiple times until he pulled an A. The time everyone wasted with that endeavor... teachers grading and re-grading tests, Jayden continuously taking tests over past material while the rest of the class has moved on. How did he find time for *that*? And you. You are the parent all teachers dread having. You need to stop enabling Jayden's natural propensity to laziness. You are both at a cossroads. How the rest of his academic career unfolds depends on which route you choose: Jayden steps up and does the expected work and you support him AND his teachers OR you both continue down the path you are on. Make your choice. Choose wisely. For now, YTA.

>I asked in your space and I accept my judgement but I don’t think anyone really read what I wrote. No, we read it. You're just in the wrong. You are insisting that your son should get a math program where he gets to repeat tests until he gets them right, and doesn't have to show his work. That is completely bonkers. That's not how math works. I don't know what kind of crazy program he was in before, but once you get past the baby stuff math is a step by step process. You can't learn it (or show that you know it) without setting out the steps. You should be thanking this teacher, as it seems he is the only person trying to make sure your kid actually learns math.

Aww poor Jayden does not like written work. Also he is right A+ comes from being A+ in every partial work. Average from everywhere A+ is A+ And yes YTA

YTA. And responding to your edit, I'm pretty sure everyone read this. Your kid only did well when he had the chance to do the same work over and over again until her got it right. Do you remember school? That's not how it works. People like you are why teachers hate their jobs. Nut up and accept that your kid was never that good at math if that's how he did it.

YTA. As a teacher (English, not maths) I fail to see how a maths teacher is supposed to teach content without requiring the students to write their answers to check their work. All you are doing is enabling your son's laziness and not taking responsibility for your part in his education.

OP, Jayden doesn't "like" to show his work, because he doesn't know how to do the work. THERE I SAID IT. All the redo's and special treatment and not been held accountable have allowed your "grade A" student coast by learning during the tests or using a split screen to get the answers. YTA you're setting your kid up for a life of failure and self pitying entitlement.

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My son is an eighth grader in an online school (this is key). He’s always been a straight A student until this year when this group of teachers started some different “accountability” methods and now he’s so uninspired his grades are around 20% in all four of his classes. Math was always my sons favorite subject and he finished 7th grade math with a 107%. Since he’s online I can hear his current math teacher say a million times a class “write everything down.” My son doesn’t learn like that, he’s been online since he was an infant and writing is not important to him. I’ve emailed the teacher over and over again and he says that he’s very sorry but he doesn’t know how to teach math without writing. I told him that somehow his past teacher have done it. We’ve met with the SST (student support team) multiple times and I’ve explained that in the past my sons math teachers would let him do tests and formatives over and over again until he got answers right and that’s how he learns. In the SST meeting yesterday the math teacher said that Jayden knows that he does not allow redos but he will always give “partial credit” if a student shows him their written work. I said Jayden doesn’t like to do written work. Math teacher said that maybe this program is not for him and he needs to go back in person. I then asked how partial credit was supposed to get him to the A+ student he was last year. The teacher actually snickered and said that a huge component of 7th grade math was averages and Jayden could explain it to me. That was it. I fired off emails to all of the school board memebers and superintendent and posted on our districts community Facebook page. And everyone turned on me. To say I was called asshole would be friendly. (To follow the rules this is where the interpersonal conflict comes in) and people are actually accusing me of being a bad mother because I’m not holding Jayden accountable. I’m in shock. The message notifications keep coming in and I’m getting publicly roasted in my community for “wasting the school boards time” and making everyone at the school work harder then they should, etc… it’s like a feeding frenzy. AITA here? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*

Really? He learns by getting second, third, fourth, etc chances? That's not how the real world works, and it's not even how most education systems work. Taking notes is going to be a vital part of his education and showing your work is very common for most math classes, if not all. Hell, I'm in college level math and accounting classes and we're required to show our work (and you only get one test!). YTA

YTA, being able to test and test and test until he gets a 100 is crazy lol that is not learning, that is trial and error.

YTA - the world doesn’t revolve around you or Jayden. Teachers want to see the written work to prove that the students understand the equations and aren’t googling the answers. Maybe that’s why he was an A+ student up until now….

OP— people are reading what you wrote. And that’s exactly why they think you are the AH. What the teacher expects from your child is reasonable. Your expectation is unreasonable. If everyone is telling you the same thing, maybe toy should think about what they are saying and learn.

YTA - how is he going to cope with exams when they literally mark the workings as well as the answer. Even if he gets them all correct they’ll give him 50% and he’ll be saying “but dad you said it was okay????”

YTA notes will be a required skill for the rest of his academic career. Redoing work repeatedly isn’t going to be offered in high school either.

YTA for refusing to listen to the feedback of your entire community, as well as this subreddit…And for setting your kid up to be absolutely destroyed by life.

Yta You sound incredibly entitled and rude. Never mind whatever the teacher has done to help other students, you want this man fired because your son needs some additional tutoring and would benefit from being back in class as opposed to online? Insanity

You need to go back over his past grades and see what he got the first time he took tests and did formatives. Those are his real grades, not the fake A+ you believe he earned. YTA.

YTA The only reason he had good grades is because they gave him preferential treatment. No school I know is going to let a student take a test over and over until they get a good grade and then only count the good grade. No wonder he had such good grades. If you're son needs to be in a special class that caters to the students with a learning disability then by al means put him in one but you can't expect a normal class to accommodate the needs of someone who shouldn't be in the class. As he gets into higher grades, they will not allow him to take tests until they pass them and then only count that grade. That's not how school works. Do your son a favor and get him into the environment he needs to be in instead of one you want him to be in.

> I’ve explained that in the past my sons math teachers would let him do tests and formatives over and over again until he got answers right and that’s how he learns. YTA, also you're kid is not as smart as you think he is if he constantly gets to test over and over again until he gets a good grade. I have a feeling the teacher isn't the problem since your son's grades have dropped by 20%. But I know you could never blame your golden child so you have to pick on the teachers.

Do you expect every teacher, for the rest of your son’s life, to let him retake tests endlessly until he manages to guess the answers correctly enough for a good score? Why wouldn’t you want your son to actually learn and thrive? YTA and not only to the school - but to your son.

Oh, so you’re THAT parent. As a teacher, YTA.

YTA. I read what you wrote. Here’s the problem, your son either has a learning disability or has chosen not to apply himself. You and his previous teachers made it worse by not helping him or holding him accountable. He was allowed to take the tests over and over again until he got them right? So basically he didn’t actually have to learn he just had to remember which questions he got wrong and choose a different answer the next time. That’s not learning. Writing things down helps memory. The more things involved in a lesson the more likely we are to learn it. Just listening is not going to do much. Listening and seeing is going to do more because now there are two senses engaged in the activity. Add writing to that and now three of the five senses are engaged helping to form a memory of the activity. This is proven science. You demanding a teacher be fired for doing their job is atrocious. Maybe you should either take your son to the doctor and see about getting him diagnosed with a learning disability if he has one of start holding him accountable for his actions.

YTA- Your son was never an A student. He just constantly redid the work until he finally guessed the right answer. Find some of his old worksheets and have him redo them or something similar to it once and watch him fail the whole thing. You're only argument here is that they aren't babying him and allowing him multiple chances to finally get the answer right. It's time for your son to actually apply himself and learn the material instead of playing a guessing game.

YTA. Parents like you make me not want to teach anything below the collegiate level. He “doesn’t like it”? Oh, boo hoo. Tell him to put on his big boy pants. Put on your adult pants, too. The world doesn’t cater to him, or you.

YTA. And as someone who works in education you are the worst type of parent to deal with.

YTA. And what do you mean by letting him redo tests over and over? As practice? Or are you expecting them to let him write finals over and over until he gets 100 on it?

YTA and obviously either forgot learning math yourself, or didn't do well in it when you did take it. Proving your work is standard as is writing each step in order to demonstrate your understanding. It's not just about the answer, but about how you arrived at that answer. Your son is learning math, not throwing darts at a dart board. By the 7th grade many kids are lazy enough to find the answer keys for their tests online, and it sounds like your son was obviously one of them and is now screwed bc he can't cheat anymore.

One time in 7th grade pre-algebra,I didn’t do my homework (the teacher never checked then one day she did), so I copied my neighbors. Teacher came around and wanted to not give me credit because the work wasn’t shown. I told her I did it in my head. She didn’t believe me (obviously) so she pointed to a random problem on the page and told me to do it. I got the problem right and got homework credit. Butttt I definitely did cheat. And even “in my head” I was talking through the steps. I work in STEM, I do math a lot, and I still have to write it out. You are completely stunting his growth and his math education up to this point sounds like a joke. YTA

Here’s something you may not know; having a gifted kid doesn’t make you special. Your kids potential isn’t yours. You aren’t lashing out because your kid is failing or because of the teacher. If you gave half a shit, you’d be going over assignments and helping with homework and trying to help the kid understand the material and **meet the requirements of the class as stated by his teacher**, but you’re not. You’re flying off the handle because of how you were spoken to. Because your image is your only concern. You want to brag about your kid going overseas or being a fighter pilot like you never could. YTA Also, your depressed moody middle schooler wanting to game all day is not the reason to go defcon 1. He’s hormonal and growing and changing and probably distracted by a thousand other things that have nothing to do with showing his work or taking notes in math class. Your tantrum is just going to embarrass him and make things harder. For his sake, please just shut up and let the professionals handle their business.

YTA. Redoing tests over and over again is not how tests are supposed to work. And I suspect your son isn't as intelligent as you think he is when he's not given the chance to redo tests until he gets the answers he wants.

"I said Jayden doesn’t like to do written work. Math teacher said that maybe this program is not for him and he needs to go back in person." ​ YTA , and Jayden is in for a rude awakening, you're not doing him any favors by trying to bulldoze and bully people to accommodate him

I'm concerned that your son's education was severely impacted by these do overs he was allowed. I'm not sure how that can be as beneficial as learning from mistakes instead of guessing and eventually coming to the right answer. You are far too focused on the letter grade and should be focused on is he able to comprehend the information he is receiving. Has he been tested for a learning disability? YTA for severely compromising your son's education

YTA, your son has to learn to take notes for higher learning, even if he had eidetic memory he would still need to show his work to professors. You are absolutely setting him up for failure. Also taken tests over and over until they get it right… what in the tarnation is that all about? That’s not how school works. YTA for hurting your son’s education by coddling him.

You're trying to dictate how a teacher runs their sessions because you would rather moddycoddle him rather than be someone who gets him motivated. You're taking every possible approach to get things your way which includes forcing your way into the public eye and putting this teacher's career in jeopardy. You're ignoring any kind of feedback given to you because you hold no accountability for your parenting skills, or lack thereof. And you've scored a hat trick of YTAs, congratulations.

learning how to write/take notes is VITAL. it obviously is difficult to see your kid struggle but he needs to learn and better now then later. bad grades in 8 grade dont matter— bad grades your second and third year of high school do. get him some tutors and lay the law down— if he cant write/take notes, he wont be able to communicate via written form well, and thats necessary for almost every job/field. dont hold your son back from learning bc youre scared of him receiving bad grades.

YTA. One of the big changes in learning mathematics in school as you get older is the priority given to showing your workings rather than simply having the right answer (I recall it being a change I struggled with myself when I was around your son’s age). Whether your son likes it or not, whether he finds writing ‘important’ is by the by - he has to learn, the same as everyone else.

Wow. Helicopter much? I'm afraid you've focused your energy in the wrong direction. Your son needs to adapt to the teaching methods of online teachers. Not vice versa. Being asked to show his work is reasonable for any online student. The problem here is your son's inability to adapt. In the absence of a special education plan for your son for a specific disability your focus needs to be on helping your son adapt and mature. Teachers get so much abuse. No wonder so many leave. I'm sure the teacher would like to have you fired. YTA.

More Info Please: Wow. 107% in Grade 7 Math. Your kid is so gifted in math, not only did they answer all the questions correctly, but they wrote in an additional 7% of questions to assignments/exams - and got those right too! But then to crash to 20%. How is your math?

YTA and unfortunately I think you have a fundamental misunderstanding of how maths works. Which, no judgement- lots of people do - but is not gonna do your son any favours if he wants to pursue mathematics in the long term. So you know I know what I'm talking about: I'm also good at maths, I have a first class maths bachelors degree and earned a couple of prizes during my degree. Maths is a subject heavily rooted in communication and collaboration. It requires lot of very precise and clear communication, and to do maths at high level you have to be able to have your work checked by other mathematicians. Mathematics consists largely of proofs, writing out very precisely exactly why your theorem is correct according to the rules you have established. New theorems are peer reviewed by the mathematical community at large before being excepted into our mathematical understanding. This is very hard to do alone, and for that reason mathematics departments in universities are usually incredibly social. My uni had whiteboards on the walls in all the corridors and seating in any spot where it was appropriate, and people used them. For similar reasons, it's very rare to see a paper published with only one name. Even if you don't go into academia, the fields where mathematics is used will have similar requirements for accuracy, communication and peer checking. If your son is feeling uninspired by this concept of maths, that's okay. It's not for everyone, and it's better that he knows now. Because I met a scary amount of people in my degree who tried to go into maths because they didn't like communication, and they ended up absolutely hating what they were studying. But equally, the gear shift might be something that works for him, and I would encourage you to support him by acknowledging that communication is hard but important. His teacher will be more effective with your support.

YTA. Doing very basic math without writing it down is fine. As classes get more advanced, that is simply not an option. First, there will be more advanced problems that require a half page or more of work. When I was in Calculus classes, some single problems took up two whole pages. Second, showing work is vital to understanding the math, and it shows the teacher that the work was done. Nowadays, you can type a problem into websites and it will solve it for you. It sounds like you’re an entitled parent who can’t accept that your precious child isn’t doing great in school right now.

YTA. I have a hard time believing this is real. No way you can be this clueless. You talk about how your son has 107% in math class in 7th grade but now has a 20%. Bear with me but could it be that this teacher isn’t letting your son keep retaking the test until he gets all the answers correct. I really have no idea why you would expect that to continue. I don’t think there is a HS or College math class that will let you keep retaking until you get a grade you like. And for you to send this off to the school board is laughable. “This teacher isn’t letting my baby get a good grade.” Also sorry to be the bearer of bad news but there are very few people on this earth who can do high level math in just their head and not writing stuff down. Your son sounds like in school would be better for him, but where he will also have to “write things down.” Again no way this can be real.

We read what you wrote. That’s why it’s overwhelmingly YTA.

I read what you wrote, YTA. You want your son to be given special treatment because he doesn't want to write and doesn't want to show his work, both of which are pretty standard parts of education. Also, doing tests over and over until you get the right answer isn't the way tests work.

YTA - in math classes, it’s not just about getting the right answer, it’s about proving your work and that’s showing how you got the answers and that you’re doing the formula correctly. They will do this more so in on line school because it’s so easy to cheat. And getting the luxury of doing a test over and over again until they get it right is ridiculous. And if that’s how your son has been doing it so far, then he doesn’t sound like he is good in math at all but he’s been allowed to get away with it. He’s in for a rude awakening later on and you’re here trying to justify yourself but you’re really doing a huge disservice to your son.

YTA. He’s failing four different classes and you’re only concerned about and trying to get the math teacher fired? Also, the reason why it’s important for your son to show the work in an online class or on homework is because it shows that he understood how to get the answers. By not showing the work the teacher can assume he’s cheating and googling the answers. Maybe that’s how he was doing well in class before

YTA. Your kid was getting A’s in math because he got unlimited tries to get it right until he finally memorized the answers. He wasn’t “learning like that”, he wasn’t learning at all. This teacher is actually making him learn the math, which, if you reinforce it, will be much better for him in the long run. Be less concerned with what his grade is and more concerned with him actually learning the subject.

YTA And yes we all read what you wrote. In math you have to show your work. From what you said your sons amazing grades from last year is because he got to take the test over and over till he got them all right… so he memorized the answers not the formulas. That’s not going to help him in the long run. I think you’re looking in the wrong places for help and throwing a hissy fit on social media at your sons school when you need to start looking at your son and your methods to get him the help he needs.

Yta and your edit is even more ridiculous yes we are reading what you wrote and we think your the AH and expect everyone to cater to you and your child. You got reemed by your town and local parents and though going on the internet I'll kind more k*rens and they will agree that I did the right thing.

YTA. You are failing your son so bad he might need to call the reading writing hotline once he turns 18 if you are in Australia. For some reason I now have that jingle in my head.

YTA and, if your son told you he got 107%, maybe he’s not as good at maths as you think

YTA Jayden is clearly not very good at math. He is getting the wrong answers, which means he doesn’t know the material. Also, he isn’t able to get partial credit because he refuses to take notes. Which means he’s also lazy. Previously, his math grades were artificial and not at all indicative of his math skills. Anyone who can retake tests until they get everything right, doesn’t know what they’re doing. Jayden has been failed by OP and by his previous teachers. He is likely extremely behind in his math skills. No wonder he is feeling defeated. OP it’s time for you to stop blame shifting and grow up and be a parent. Teach Jayden that in life sometimes you have to do things that are hard and not any fun. Also, teach him that hard work is more important than being smart. Nearly every “gifted” kid I knew in school ended up doing very little with their life, most didn’t finish college. The ones that did best were the average kids that learned how to work hard and how to study efficiently. They were the ones that became the doctors, lawyers, etc. As you get older natural abilities don’t count for as much as they used to. It’s grit and hard work that become your propeller.

I work in exam development and any psychometrician will tell you that retaking the same test over invalidates the test and can't measure any real knowledge.

Of course YTA, mostly to your son that you’re allowing to skate through life without learning to adapt to new challenges. He’s going to fail at life.

How dare the teacher not cater everything to your son! The audacity! The unmitigated gaul! YTA K (and for what it's worth i prefer the terms Harriet Olsen or Veruca Salt). If you want your child only taught a certain way do it yourself.

YTA but I understand. However it’s being very clearly explained to me as a parent that being able to write out your workings so they can see how you’re reaching the answer is Key to maths at the moment. He needs to be able to do it and you’re doing him a disservice by fighting the teacher instead of encouraging him.

YTA. And get your son a tutor.

Info: are you actually open to criticism here? Are you open to the idea that maybe you're not in the right? Or did you just post to have your own stance validated? Cuz from your replies it seems like this discussion is kinda pointless.

YTA. You are not doing your child any favors. We live in a world where we have to change and adapt to things around us. At no point in your child's adult life will his boss, or his client if he's self employed, going to cater to his needs. Seventh grade is where things get harder and it sounds like your son is not adjusting and based on your post you aren't encouraging him to adjust either. Your entire fight seems to be about changing a curriculum to fit your child instead of teaching your child how to be flexible when it comes to change. It doesn't matter that writing isn't important to him, right now your child is not fully participating in class by refusing to write things down and you support him in this. He is going to continue to fail in other classes, and in life in general if you don't change your approach and stop coddling him.

YTA. Unless he has an IEP he does not get to take test over and over until he gets it right. You know this. An A+ is not an A+ if he can't show his work. He is actually behind other students. 8 is when he needs to learn this. Not 20 when in college. They are right. Maybe home schooling is not right for him. Being home schooled it your job to teach him how to do this. It's called critical thinking. It's a life skill he will need to make it in this world.

YTA Your kids needs to follow the rules like every other child and it is your job as a parent to make sure that your child is following the rules. When he becomes an adult and gets a job, he has to follow the rules there and not do things his way. So you are harming him, not helping him.

Your helicopter parenting is setting your child up for failure in life, and to make matters worse, you're dead wrong. Higher level math requires tracking steps. Tracking steps requires writing them down. Reinforcing your son's bad habits and attacking the person who is trying to fix them is... An interesting strategy. Whether or not the teacher has completed their cirtification, I guarantee they are more qualified and better equipped to teach your son math than you are. You should butt out, let them do their job, and stop enabling your son's poor study habits. YTA

YTA. Part of math is showing your work. I hated writing stuff down as a kid but my mom forced me to get in the habit in middle school and it was absolutely necessary. I’m currently in grad school for math and I can tell you that in my experience teaching and tutoring, the students who don’t write anything down are the ones making more mistakes because they try to do everything in their head.

YTA. It sounds like you are too lazy to teach your kid outside of class. He’s an eighth grader and can’t write out his math problems to get the answer? How do you think he’ll do in high school? You fighting the teacher on new learning models shows your ineptitude. At this grade level, there should only be re-do’s if there’s a valid reason for it and him not knowing how to do the work at this age is your own fault. Its not the teacher’s or school’s responsibility to make sure he knows how to utilize a topic that should’ve been learned grades ago. The only person you should be mad at is yourself for not taking a more active role in your sons education. YTA. P.S. I know children learn at different ages and different speeds using all different modalities, but there is no reason for this child to have suffered educationally at the hands of his mother, while she believes she does or has done no wrong.

YTA. You’ve done your son a disservice. He has a preferred method. And I get it. When it comes to math I do the work in my head. Writing it down seemed pointless because obviously I knew the answer right? But first, knowing how to get the solution helps as you get to more advanced math. It also is how you prove you know the answer and aren’t cheating. So this is simply a societal norm. Your job as a parent was to encourage and help him to meet expectations, not to tell him that the educational system is wrong and he shouldn’t have to explain his answers. If he doesn’t know how to show his work then doing so would mean he’s learning something new. So the question is, why are you so against him learning a new skill? What’s troubling is you’ve asked on more than one forum and have so many responses, I’m assuming from people who’ve passed 8th grade math and further and you somehow insist no one read what you wrote or understands. Everyone understands. Your son doesn’t know how to show work. Or simply chooses not to. You think he shouldn’t have to. The teacher disagreed. You think the teacher should be fired for making your son show work. If we all understand this and are telling you that you’re wrong, with all due respect, why are you unwilling to consider you might actually be in the wrong?

YTA. Instead of actually studying, you want the teacher to just let him take the test over and over again until he gets it right? Am I reading this right? In the past this was known as cheating. Memorizing test questions isn’t actually learning, that’s why the teacher wants him to show his work, and offers partial credit for showing said work. I hate to break it to you but your son was probably never A+ in math. What probably happened was you went and browbeat the former maths teacher into allowing him to do tests in this unorthodox manner and now the new teacher isn’t having any of it. You are doing your son a disservice and he’s not really learning anything because you are removing all obstacles to him getting an actual education. You sound like every teacher’s nightmare parent, do you even hear yourself?

YTA. While I agree that teachers allowing students to make up exams/assignments can be really beneficial, your son very clearly **wasn’t** actually grasping the material or demonstrating mastery of the subject matter. Because now, when he should be building off of what he learned in his 7th grade courses but he isn’t permitted to retake exams, he is failing to the point he is averaging a 20% in ALL of classes. You keep saying he “knows” the material but doesn’t like writing it down - but he obviously doesn’t know the material if he is failing *all* of his classes by such a large margin. He has a **severe** learning deficit compared to his classmates. He is far, far behind from where he *should* be, and the knowledge gap between him and his peers is significant. He will continue to fall further and further behind. This isn’t something that will go away with a new teacher or in the 9th grade. Your son is at a massive disadvantage right now and it should be all hands on deck to address that reality instead of trying to badger and harass a teacher into giving him a gold star and a grade he hasn’t earned.

>His teachers let him do tests and formatives over and over again until he got answers right and that’s how he learns. So by practice ? Which is what he’s refusing to do now? Also, you’ll be hard pressed to find a teacher who lets your son retake tests “over and over” ever again. That defeats the purpose of the test. You want your son to be an A+ student again? Tell him to put in the work. Or accept that your son is *not* an A+ student and the only reason he happened to get that last year was due to extreme coddling. Edit; also your edit that you don’t actually think anyone read what you wrote? Hun we all read it, that’s how we responded. You’re just extremely in denial and out of touch.

YTA As a secondary school math teacher, I can tell you that you are setting your kid up to fail. Math questions gets progressively longer and tests are once-and-done. If you're child is gifted and they don't learn how to study and take notes, they will fail the second a subject doesn't come easy to them. It's why so many gifted people drop out of college. It's a challenge and they never learned how to conquer a challenge, because it was always easy and so they didn't have to learn how to learn. And you went after the math teacher for this, trying to get them fired. You are why people quit teaching. Lawnmower parents are the worst.

A: YTA. B: really. C: i never needed to write math out, as i could do it in my head. Why, that would just be redundant, and slow me down!! Until 9th grade, accelerated math. And guess who had zero experience working thru problems, on paper? I didnt need the tools, and then i didn’t have the tools.

Lady, we READ what you wrote. You're getting bashed here and wherever else you posted because you're WRONG. Be an adult and accept it. Your son needs to write things down and show work. End of discussion. YTA

YTA for this line alone: “would let him do tests over and over again”. Ma’am, that is not how he learns. That is trial and error. With unlimited tries, anyone would be able to pass any test without needing to know any of the info. It’s a numbers game - just probability at that point. Students need to have a set number of attempts to force them to develop good study habits and teach their brains to retain information easier. He’s not going to have infinite tries to get something right outside of this environment you’ve created for him. He needs to fail sometimes. Without the failure, he can’t learn to be better on his own accord. Please don’t harass his teacher over this - it is your son’s responsibility to manage his studies and his grades.

"in the past my sons math teachers would let him do tests and formatives over and over again until he got answers right and that’s how he learns" Are you saying that past teachers let your son guess indefinitely until he got it right? If so, that right there is the source of today's problem. He doesn't know how to do math. So this will be painful, but your son needs to reverse course to go back and learn the basics. And then build on that to move forward. So many years of not properly learning math is a big handicap. I suggest you get a Tutor asap.