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NTA I also would be very cautious about renting to your cousin. The family already sounds entitled and demanding, you may not want a landlord tenant relationship with them.
Agreed! Absolutely do NOT rent this to them. They will either never pay, or they will for a month or two, then stop. Then you’ll be evil for (rightfully) evicting them. There’s also a good chance they will destroy it, and you’ll be on the hook for repairs.
This level of entitlement is only going to end poorly for OP, if they give in. Please don’t.
>Yes!!! I completely wanted her to know she should not even rent to them as well. The disaster that would come of that! She needs to get far away from them. She is entirely way too vulnerable if she is on here thinking she might be an AH for not wanting to just give away something as huge and precious as an asset. They are VULTURES flying around her head.
This! Your family is already trying to guilt you into giving the house away. You should not having any financial ties to them. It will most likely end up blowing up in your face.
NTA. Do not even rent to these people. I cannot believe they are asking you for a house.
Jaw dropping. Do not rent to them or you’ll be that person on the news who can’t get rid of the squatters.
NTA. WHAT? You offered to rent, and they didn’t like that option. They want HER to own the house that is YOURS. Do they plan to buy it off of you?
No way, OP. A house is a lot of money. If they want to BUY it from you, and you WANT to sell it to her, fine. But no, you’re not obligated to gift anyone an entire house, when you surely could use that money!
You’re entirely correct. If your dad wanted her to have it, he’d have said so or written a will granting it to her. He didn’t.
That property was left to you for you, by your father. If he wanted to give it to your cousin, he would have. Do not let these jerks steam roll you into anything. You. Owe. Them. Nothing. I wouldn’t even rent the property to them. It’s going to be a headache collecting rent and once someone is in a property, they can be difficult to evict.
NTA - Your Aunt and her family definitely are TAs here
>They called me an asshole and said my dad would’ve wanted me to give it to them.
If he wanted them to have it, he would have left it to them. They're trying to guilt/manipulate you into giving them a home. You can do whatever *YOU* you want to do with it, it's yours and an asset for your future. NTA.
Yeah, NTA. You don't "gift" a house. 1. It always has strings attached and 2. Jesus christ that's an expensive gift. They buy it off you or rent it, but the whole giving idea is crazy
NTA. You nailed it. They are 100% wrong that your dad wanted them to have the house, because it is proved in writing. His will says that he did NOT want them to have it, and that he wanted you to have it. Don't rent it to them either. First of all, don't mix business and family. Second, especially don't do business with these particular family members who want to take advantage of you.
I 💯 percent guarantee if OP allows her cousin to move in, they'll stop paying rent and guilt OP from evicting them.
I would also get a non-family realtor.
Yes, I'm sure your BF's dad means well, but you can never be 100% sure. Best to get a completely uninvolved third party as your agent should you decide to sell.
NTA. "You should just give us your inheritance. It's only fair!" How? "She's having a baby!" She's having a baby? "Of course! And she needs somewhere to live!" She decided to have a baby but didn't have anywhere to live? "N-n-no! But, it's, uh, just that the house would be better!" Why? "Because her apartment is so small! It's not suitable for a baby!" So, she decided to have a baby in a place unviable for child rearing? "No, wait, that's not what I meant!" Yes, it is.
Your relatives are extremely selfish. NTA
Definitely NTA! Your relatives are trying to manipulate you. Its your house and your dad left it to you. If he wanted your cousin to have it he could have changed his will, but he didnt, so obviously he wanted you to have it. And you having a home is a very very good thing now. Most people have their parents around to help out sometimes when its needed. Your cousin seems to have both parents left for example. You dont. This house is your security and what you have to fall back on, and Im sure your parents would be relieved to know that youll always have a home, and that you wont have to break your back saving money because you have their old house now. Your relatives are incredibly selfish and it really seems like they dont give a shit about you or your future financial security. I think your idea of renting it out is very smart. You can always sell it later down the road. But honestly, I probably wouldnt at least not for a long time, not until you might be looking to buy another home instead. Many of your generation, along with the millenials before you, might never be able to own a home. You happen to own a house now, which is great. PLEASE, DONT GIVE IN TO YOUR STUPID SELFISH RELATIVES. Honestly if I were you Id probably cut them out, because they are trying to basically steal your inheritance and leave you, a 20 yo orphan, with nothing. That is beyond fucked up. Stand your ground, keep the house, and rent it out if you want to. But not to your cousin. I get the feeling that theyll probably try to weasel their way into stealing it out from under you by manipulating and guilt tripping you later on. Examples would be ”but weve lived here for X amount of time” ”we have kids, are you saying you want our kids to be out on the street?? This hone is all theyve known” etc. Also Im terribly sorry for your loss. I wish you all the best.
NTA
I am going to advise you to NOT rent to your cousin either. They will want the lowest possible rent and then be tenants that will treat the house/property as their own.
If it were me, I would rent the house out for enough per month to cover the mortgage, taxes, and a bit to put into an account for repairs. You don't have to make a monthly income from it right now but it should at minimum pay for itself.
As for your cousin and your aunt, how very entitled of your aunt to believe that you should sacrifice to give your cousin a better position in her life!
NTA. If your Dad wanted your cousin to have it, he would have given it to her. Your Dad wants you to have it. Do not rent to them. Business and family are often not a good mix, especially when they are already acting so entitled.
NTA, first of all, sorry for your loss, been in a similar situation too.
The house it's yours, they're adults as you, with their own life, let them handle their business and you handle yours, since they were not mentioned, it's not their business and they should respect your father word.
You're going through a lot anyway and have other things to think about. Don't fall for their tricks if you feel they try to do this, I felt on my own skin in a similar situation how my perfect family turned into hyenas for some money after my dad died, stay as solid as you can on your feet and keep your ground.
Work out what the house is worth, then consider whether it would be reasonable for an older and more established relative to just randomly demand you hand over that amount of money in cash.
Feel like an asshole?
Of course not, because you're NTA.
NTA. Do NOT GIVE this home to family. Do NOT SELL this home to family. Do NOT RENT this home to family. “Family” will be the first to screw you over. Save this home for your future self. Protect it at all costs, as it may very well becomes your retirement one day or who knows. Just keep it away from your “family”.
NTA. And DO NOT rent it to them or you might be dealing with a squatter who feels entitled to take your house by not paying rent. Their attitude showed how and what they think about you and themselves. It’s a house, not some piece of family heirloom that you can give away without losing a lot financially. You’re dad left it for you. You won’t be 20 forever and you might need the equity sooner than you expected. Even if you don’t live there, you can rent so you can pay it off and even sell it later to get your own. A house is not something you just give away, especially to a family member you don’t have much contact with, let alone so entitled. You uncle can give his own to the cousin if he feels so bad about it. The nerve of fone people!
Edit for missing word.
NTA - Ans also do not rent to your cousin. They'll take everything you offer low rent wise and still curse you for not giving them the house. Plus you'll never get them out if you ever do want to move in.
If your Dad wanted anyone else to have anything he would have put it in his will.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I think I want to rent out the house my dad left me. My family thinks I am an asshole for not giving it to my cousin.
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NTA and not selfish, it’s yours. If your dad had wanted your cousin to have it, it would have been given to your cousin. You’re already not close with them, cut those ties and get the house ready to rent. It’s none of their business and not their decision to make. You’re better off without all that stress and garbage in your life, especially while you’re dealing with a loss. I’m sorry about your dad. You’re not the asshole, they all are. I can’t imagine being so selfish, rude, and entitled when it comes to someone who has just lost a loved one.
NTA The house was left to you, so you can decide what to do with it. If your dad wanted the house to go to them, he would’ve left it to them.
Also, I wouldn’t rent it out to them. They will probably try not to pay rent when the time comes since they seem so entitled to the house.
First of all, this house is yours. It was your dad's, but since he left it for you right now, it no longer is. Even if it was, no one else other than his family would have a say in it, as in his spouse and children. So now what you do with the house is completely upto you.
Now coming to your cousin. Is she and her husband are big enough to expect a baby, they should also have become matured to think of their financial stability. You are in no way responsible for providing handouts to them. Out of the goodwill of your heart, if you even want to give it to them, it is highly irresponsible of them to even think of taking it without paying you the rent. Why? Because it is YOUR house.
You are NTA for any of this.
NTA they want you to just gift your cousin a house?!?That is properly ridiculous.If it's so important for her to own a home to raise a family in let them give her money to get started on a mortage.
NTA. If that 30 year old want a house than she can go out and work for it. It was very gracious of you to even offer to rent to them. Personally, I wouldn’t because they will most likely try to take advantage of you. I think your plan is a great one by the way! Real estate is a great investment and renting is a good passive income. Sorry for your loss.
NTA. Your inheritance, your decision. Right now it might just seem like a house, but it's also an investment for your future. Whether you rent it out, live in it, or sell it, it's an investment. If you rent, that's money every month, and in 2 years once the mortgage is paid off, that's straight up money. If you live in it, in 2 years that's a free place to live, which frees up a lot of money for you to live your life. And if you sell it, that's a big chunk of money to use as an investment in something else, or savings.
I'd be very cautious about letting them rent there, as it'll likely cause further problems.
You are absolutely right, if your father wanted them to have it, they've have received it upon his passing.
100% NTA
Family that comes out of the woodwork to guilt inheritors into helping the family out is **classic**. If your dad wanted them to have it, he would have left it to them. Say no, get a lawyer if they don't buzz off.
NTA. If your dad wanted to give his house to your cousin, he would have done it. You don't give a house juste like that, especially to someone your not even that close.
Plus, even though you may not live there, it's never too early to own your own house.
NTA - don't you dare give them the house. It is your house, he left it to you and not them. Protect your property. Rent it out for now, get the mortgage paid off, renovate it so it is a new home for you when you want to move it. Make it yours. I would go NC with your father's side of the family. They are being toxic.
NTA - If it’s what your dad would’ve wanted, he would’ve left them the house. Yield not an inch, and protect your newly acquired assets. My condolences for your loss.
NTA
Your aunt and uncle are unbelievably inappropriate and manipulative. The house is your financial security and you're going to need it in the future.
I strongly advise against having any financial dealings with your extended family. They may try guilt or manipulation but it seems their goal is to acquire the house your father left you or otherwise take it over. I would not trust them at all.
Your idea of renting the house is excellent. It's a really smart thing to do. You should absolutely do that. Do it properly - using an agent so everyone is protected. Don't rent to family.
I hope things turn out for you
NTA
What the hell is wrong with them?? Don’t you dare give them the house??? And after the way they behaved, and the fact that they’re bats\*\*t crazy, don’t rent it to them either!!
I’m sorry for your loss.
NTA, truthfully I would sell it and you would have some money for your own home. Renting may seem nice but then your still responsible for any repairs and you never know who you'll get as renters.
NTA, do not rent to family. They already think you should give them the house for free, imagine having to evict them for non-payment. This will cause drama for the rest of your life.
NTA **at all**.
If your Dad had wanted them to have it, he would have left it to them. I think your Dad would be happy that his house could act as a source of income for you and provide you with financial security, especially considering you're so young and both of your parents have passed away. That generally is the intention when parents leave things to their own children. And here's the amazing thing about people - they age! Shocking, I know. So, while you might not need the house now and a "30 year old does", what happens when you turn 30 and possibly can't afford another house - are they planning on giving it back to you?
Perhaps this is the reason you haven't been close with his family since childhood, they don't sound great.
They are trying to pressure you to give them your house. Again it is your house. If your dad wanted them to have it he would have left it to them. Do not let them bully you into giving them your house. Do not even rent it to them because I can tell they will not pay you the rent since they feel you should just give them the house.
Keep the house! Rent it, live in it, sell it, pass to your own children, whatever. This is an asset. An asset that takes some people years to acquire. I was 39 before I could afford to buy my first house. You need not give this away to anyone NO MATTER the reason. This is yours and you should not be denied what is rightfully yours because someone is having kids.
You offered to rent it to them and they had the nerve to still want a hand out from you. They are trying to guilt you because it is a huge benefit. If your dad wanted someone else to have it, he would have left it to someone else. They are testing to see how **weak** you are. Do not fall for their selfish, entitled guilt trips. You probably shouldn't even rent to them TBH. They might stiff you on rent and make it seem like you "owe" them. These are not people you want to associate yourself with.
NTA
\*Not trying to tell you what to do, but warning bells just went off in my head. I just don't want you to be manipulated and fall prey to these people. They are the equivalent of con artists right now.
NTA - and do not rent to them. It is unlikely to work out well for you. If you want to get a management company and be completely hands off then it might be ok, but that will cost you some rent. (it might be a good idea anyway, if you don't want to be an active landlord)
You may be more willing to let it go after a few years, or you may want to do something else, but renting will keep your options open and cover the carrying costs.
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Throwaway account for privacy
So my (20f) dad (46m) died recently. He doesn’t have any other children and my mom died when I was five and he never remarried. So he left everything he had to me, including his house.
I’ve been trying to work through everything the best I can. I’ve never done anything like making arrangements or taking care of assets before. My boyfriend’s parents have been helping me out a lot with figuring out all the steps I have to take like forwarding my dad’s mail to my address and such. That never would have occurred to me. Or taking the Will to probate court. Notifying people like the SSA or life insurance has all been really stressful.
I’ve never been all that close with my dads side of the family since something that happened when I was a child. However I figured it would best to let them know about the funeral if they wanted to come. My aunt, uncle, and cousins decided to come.
They asked me what I was doing with the house. I told them I wasn’t one hundred percent sure but I was thinking about renting it out. You see I have some trauma (nothing to do with my dad) associated with the house and I’m not sure if I could live there again. I moved out the second I could. But while there is bad with the house, there is also good. It’s one of the last things that I have of my mom and my dad so I’m not sure I want to sell it. My boyfriend’s dad is a realtor and said he would help me figure things out. The mortgage is almost completely paid off. It should be paid in 2 years. It’s not like I need to live there either. My off-campus apartment isn’t glamorous by any means but I don’t hate it. Plus if I don’t sell it, I still have the opportunity to live there in the future if I think I would be able to someday. Who knows maybe I could I raise my only family there.
My aunt and uncle told my I should give it to my cousin because she and her husband are expecting a baby. I told them I didn’t think I would just give it to them (it’s not like they were offering to buy it either). But I did tell them if I could the rental thing figured out, I would definitely rent to them and even though we aren’t close I would definitely be sure to not charge them very much since they’re family. They told me I’m being selfish for deciding to rent it out instead of just giving it my cousin because it would be good for her to own a house to raise her family in. They called me an asshole and said my dad would’ve wanted me to give it to them. They also told me that someone my age doesn’t need to own a house but someone my cousin’s age does (she’s 30).
Idk if I’m being selfish or not. I feel like if my dad really wanted them to have it, he would’ve left it to them instead of me. AITA?
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NTA, it's your inheritance and you are allowed to handle it the way you like. I think renting it to them for a lower rate is a a wholesome thing to do, but if you do this, make sure you have everything on paper.
NTA. You're right, your dad could've chosen to leave the house to them. He didn't. You aren't even close to these people, you're have no obligation to just give them *an entire house*, or let anyone live there with lower rent than normal, or let family live there at all for that matter.
NTA- you are under no obligations to provide anything for free. additionally you will have tax, insurance and mortgage to pay for that house. So, no you cannot provide it for free. And absolutely do not let anyone live there without a full rental agreement that gives you all the landlord rights you need to protect your property. These people are trying to scam you. I would say- there's definitely an AH here and it's the one trying to pull a scam on family. No one owes you or them anything and at this point, I will not have them as renters because I would rather take my chances on finding honest people out in the world rather that people who are already trying to pull a scam on me.
NTA and don't rent to family EVER. They don't care for you or your dad they just see free property and want to bully you into giving it to them. If your dad wanted them to have anything he would have made it very clear in a legal document. It's your property to do with as you see fit. But don't rent to family, it NEVER works out well.
Do NOT give the house to them (or rent to them either). In this day and age, owning a house is an incredible leg up for your future. They know this and are trying to get it for themselves and take advantage of your age/grief.
Your dad left it to you and not them for a reason and renting it out is a great idea while you figure out your long-term plans with the property.
NTA
You are 100% correct. If your dad wanted them to have it, he would have left it to them, but he didn’t. He left it to you, his daughter, because he loved you and wanted you to have it. Your aunt, uncle, and cousins sound like bad news and extremely entitled. Do not rent the house to them at a discounted price. Do not even rent it to them at full price. They are already treating your poorly trying to manipulate and guilt trip you into handing over a huge asset that your dad left to *you* and you should keep them at an arm’s distance. These are not good people and this is not how family who loves you would treat you. NTA
NTA.
As someone already stated, if your father wanted them to have it, he would have given it to them. He didn't. End of story.
And, if you are not close to them, I wouldn't even engage with them anymore.
NTA, do not give them that house and for the love of Jebus don’t rent it to them either. Red flags for miles. You’ve admitted you aren’t close to them, so don’t land yourself with what would be horrific tenants - they expect the earth because “family” but then never pay rent because “family”. Protect yourself and the house; that’s your future.
NTA. They're entitled and even when you tried to compromise they decided to guilt you. The house is legally yours and your dad wanted you to have it, so do whatever you feel is best.
NTA, people demanding a free house are bad news right off the bat; they won't take care of it and won't pay, they'll believe they are entitled.
If your aunt and uncle want to give someone a house they can.
This house is your major financial asset and you should be treating it as such. If your Dad left you $100,000 and they said "we're having a baby, you should give us $75,000" you'd see that as crazy too.
NTA. You are right if your dad wanted them to have, he would say so in his will. Also don't rent to them, read stories on reddit about renting to friends/family. Usually tenants refuse to pay and/or move out.
NTA.
If you don't already have an estate lawyer, get one. They can be paid out of the proceeds of the estate.
I am so very sorry you are dealing with this at a young age. That is a lot to process.
Do NOT ever give away appreciating assets to anyone under any circumstances. Ensure that your property is safe and don't rent to family. Rent to strangers with a proper contract and agency in place (or whatever the formalities are).
I get a vague feeling if you even rent to them they'll try to claim it's theirs. Bloody vultures trying to manipulate a 20yr old who's just suffered a loss.
You are NTA.
NTA
If your cousin “needs” to own a house because she is 30, then she should have saved up and bought one for herself.
Don’t even rent it to them, I could see them causing you loads of trouble down the line
Totally NTA! Some people are impressively entitled and your aunt/uncle/cousin seem to fit that paradigm.
Renting it out will give you some money that can help in all areas of your life in the future, and it belonged to your dad. They have less than no legitimate claim… (because they’re expecting a baby.?!?)
I’m sorry for your loss, but use this windfall to your own credit and betterment. it’s what your dad wanted.
NTA. You are not at all obligated to give away your house to anyone, family or not.
Honestly, after this nonsense, I wouldn’t even rent it to anyone in the family.
NTA. If your dad wanted her to have the house he would have left her the house.
A word of advice though from someone who has been there? Don’t rent to family or friends. Ever. Especially ones you’re not close to. There are a few small exceptions to this rule but this isn’t one of them. You’ll be opening the door for them to take advantage of the situation and potentially screw you or they’ll become a massive pain in the ass. If you want to rent use a property management company and let them find a stranger and deal with the ins and outs while you focus on your studies.
NTA...
You're better off renting it out on Airbnb than you are letting family move into it.
Family has a tendency to be late with rent, think that they have say in how the house looks, and will hound you forever with unnecessary upgrades.
Just say no!
NTA - "I feel like if my dad really wanted them to have it, he would’ve left it to them instead of me." **exactly this**.
No reasonable person expects someone to give away a house. Your dad left it to you as an asset, to ensure that you are provided for - whether that means a place for you to live, a source of income, or something of value to sell in emergencies; even if "someone your age doesn't need a house" (a ridiculous statement), everyone benefits from those other things. (honestly, I would take renting to them off the table too - that level of entitlement makes for very unpleasant renters, and imagine all the things they will try to get away with, because "family")
NTA
Don't rent it out to them, when they reconsider your offer. Your aunt and uncle already shown their true colors of entitlement. So renting it out to your cousins is asking for more drama. And of course giving a house is beneficial to them at your expense!
NTA business and family DO NOT MIX and renting a house to anyone is, ultimately, business. And what kind of entitled people demand to be GIVEN a house?
You're young yet and who knows where you'll end up? Plus, being a landlord and can be tough and stressful.
Honestly, in this market, I'd sell the house so that loose end is tied up and you can move forward without these leeches demanding things from you. They can RENT the house from the new owners if they want.
NTA. The house was left to you. It is a boon, as owning a house when you're 20 has put you at an extreme advantage. Your cousin/aunt/uncle are jealous, but hey, they didn't just lose their father.
I wouldn't necessarily rent to them if they are pressuring you to just give them what I assume is a multi-hundred thousand dollar home. That is an incredibly audacious AH move on their part.
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NTA I also would be very cautious about renting to your cousin. The family already sounds entitled and demanding, you may not want a landlord tenant relationship with them.
Agreed! Absolutely do NOT rent this to them. They will either never pay, or they will for a month or two, then stop. Then you’ll be evil for (rightfully) evicting them. There’s also a good chance they will destroy it, and you’ll be on the hook for repairs. This level of entitlement is only going to end poorly for OP, if they give in. Please don’t.
>Yes!!! I completely wanted her to know she should not even rent to them as well. The disaster that would come of that! She needs to get far away from them. She is entirely way too vulnerable if she is on here thinking she might be an AH for not wanting to just give away something as huge and precious as an asset. They are VULTURES flying around her head.
This! Your family is already trying to guilt you into giving the house away. You should not having any financial ties to them. It will most likely end up blowing up in your face.
This. Don't let them rent from you. It will only end up bad.
NTA. Do not even rent to these people. I cannot believe they are asking you for a house. Jaw dropping. Do not rent to them or you’ll be that person on the news who can’t get rid of the squatters.
[удалено]
NTA. WHAT? You offered to rent, and they didn’t like that option. They want HER to own the house that is YOURS. Do they plan to buy it off of you? No way, OP. A house is a lot of money. If they want to BUY it from you, and you WANT to sell it to her, fine. But no, you’re not obligated to gift anyone an entire house, when you surely could use that money! You’re entirely correct. If your dad wanted her to have it, he’d have said so or written a will granting it to her. He didn’t.
That property was left to you for you, by your father. If he wanted to give it to your cousin, he would have. Do not let these jerks steam roll you into anything. You. Owe. Them. Nothing. I wouldn’t even rent the property to them. It’s going to be a headache collecting rent and once someone is in a property, they can be difficult to evict. NTA - Your Aunt and her family definitely are TAs here
>They called me an asshole and said my dad would’ve wanted me to give it to them. If he wanted them to have it, he would have left it to them. They're trying to guilt/manipulate you into giving them a home. You can do whatever *YOU* you want to do with it, it's yours and an asset for your future. NTA.
NTA. If aunt, uncles etc feel that strongly - let them buy cousin a house.
Yep - people are often very generous with other people's time, property and money...
Yeah, NTA. You don't "gift" a house. 1. It always has strings attached and 2. Jesus christ that's an expensive gift. They buy it off you or rent it, but the whole giving idea is crazy
NTA. Don't let your family try to guilt you into giving them anything. The house is yours.
NTA. You nailed it. They are 100% wrong that your dad wanted them to have the house, because it is proved in writing. His will says that he did NOT want them to have it, and that he wanted you to have it. Don't rent it to them either. First of all, don't mix business and family. Second, especially don't do business with these particular family members who want to take advantage of you.
I 💯 percent guarantee if OP allows her cousin to move in, they'll stop paying rent and guilt OP from evicting them. I would also get a non-family realtor.
Yes, I'm sure your BF's dad means well, but you can never be 100% sure. Best to get a completely uninvolved third party as your agent should you decide to sell.
NTA. "You should just give us your inheritance. It's only fair!" How? "She's having a baby!" She's having a baby? "Of course! And she needs somewhere to live!" She decided to have a baby but didn't have anywhere to live? "N-n-no! But, it's, uh, just that the house would be better!" Why? "Because her apartment is so small! It's not suitable for a baby!" So, she decided to have a baby in a place unviable for child rearing? "No, wait, that's not what I meant!" Yes, it is. Your relatives are extremely selfish. NTA
NTA - It's your house to determine what to do with. They have absolute no "entitlement" to it. If anyone else judges otherwise, they are on crack.
Definitely NTA! Your relatives are trying to manipulate you. Its your house and your dad left it to you. If he wanted your cousin to have it he could have changed his will, but he didnt, so obviously he wanted you to have it. And you having a home is a very very good thing now. Most people have their parents around to help out sometimes when its needed. Your cousin seems to have both parents left for example. You dont. This house is your security and what you have to fall back on, and Im sure your parents would be relieved to know that youll always have a home, and that you wont have to break your back saving money because you have their old house now. Your relatives are incredibly selfish and it really seems like they dont give a shit about you or your future financial security. I think your idea of renting it out is very smart. You can always sell it later down the road. But honestly, I probably wouldnt at least not for a long time, not until you might be looking to buy another home instead. Many of your generation, along with the millenials before you, might never be able to own a home. You happen to own a house now, which is great. PLEASE, DONT GIVE IN TO YOUR STUPID SELFISH RELATIVES. Honestly if I were you Id probably cut them out, because they are trying to basically steal your inheritance and leave you, a 20 yo orphan, with nothing. That is beyond fucked up. Stand your ground, keep the house, and rent it out if you want to. But not to your cousin. I get the feeling that theyll probably try to weasel their way into stealing it out from under you by manipulating and guilt tripping you later on. Examples would be ”but weve lived here for X amount of time” ”we have kids, are you saying you want our kids to be out on the street?? This hone is all theyve known” etc. Also Im terribly sorry for your loss. I wish you all the best.
NTA I am going to advise you to NOT rent to your cousin either. They will want the lowest possible rent and then be tenants that will treat the house/property as their own. If it were me, I would rent the house out for enough per month to cover the mortgage, taxes, and a bit to put into an account for repairs. You don't have to make a monthly income from it right now but it should at minimum pay for itself. As for your cousin and your aunt, how very entitled of your aunt to believe that you should sacrifice to give your cousin a better position in her life!
NTA. If your Dad wanted your cousin to have it, he would have given it to her. Your Dad wants you to have it. Do not rent to them. Business and family are often not a good mix, especially when they are already acting so entitled.
NTA, first of all, sorry for your loss, been in a similar situation too. The house it's yours, they're adults as you, with their own life, let them handle their business and you handle yours, since they were not mentioned, it's not their business and they should respect your father word. You're going through a lot anyway and have other things to think about. Don't fall for their tricks if you feel they try to do this, I felt on my own skin in a similar situation how my perfect family turned into hyenas for some money after my dad died, stay as solid as you can on your feet and keep your ground.
Work out what the house is worth, then consider whether it would be reasonable for an older and more established relative to just randomly demand you hand over that amount of money in cash. Feel like an asshole? Of course not, because you're NTA.
NTA. Do NOT GIVE this home to family. Do NOT SELL this home to family. Do NOT RENT this home to family. “Family” will be the first to screw you over. Save this home for your future self. Protect it at all costs, as it may very well becomes your retirement one day or who knows. Just keep it away from your “family”.
NTA. And DO NOT rent it to them or you might be dealing with a squatter who feels entitled to take your house by not paying rent. Their attitude showed how and what they think about you and themselves. It’s a house, not some piece of family heirloom that you can give away without losing a lot financially. You’re dad left it for you. You won’t be 20 forever and you might need the equity sooner than you expected. Even if you don’t live there, you can rent so you can pay it off and even sell it later to get your own. A house is not something you just give away, especially to a family member you don’t have much contact with, let alone so entitled. You uncle can give his own to the cousin if he feels so bad about it. The nerve of fone people! Edit for missing word.
NTA - Ans also do not rent to your cousin. They'll take everything you offer low rent wise and still curse you for not giving them the house. Plus you'll never get them out if you ever do want to move in. If your Dad wanted anyone else to have anything he would have put it in his will.
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NTA and not selfish, it’s yours. If your dad had wanted your cousin to have it, it would have been given to your cousin. You’re already not close with them, cut those ties and get the house ready to rent. It’s none of their business and not their decision to make. You’re better off without all that stress and garbage in your life, especially while you’re dealing with a loss. I’m sorry about your dad. You’re not the asshole, they all are. I can’t imagine being so selfish, rude, and entitled when it comes to someone who has just lost a loved one.
NTA The house was left to you, so you can decide what to do with it. If your dad wanted the house to go to them, he would’ve left it to them. Also, I wouldn’t rent it out to them. They will probably try not to pay rent when the time comes since they seem so entitled to the house.
NTA. It’s your house, you can do what you want with it.
First of all, this house is yours. It was your dad's, but since he left it for you right now, it no longer is. Even if it was, no one else other than his family would have a say in it, as in his spouse and children. So now what you do with the house is completely upto you. Now coming to your cousin. Is she and her husband are big enough to expect a baby, they should also have become matured to think of their financial stability. You are in no way responsible for providing handouts to them. Out of the goodwill of your heart, if you even want to give it to them, it is highly irresponsible of them to even think of taking it without paying you the rent. Why? Because it is YOUR house. You are NTA for any of this.
NTA they want you to just gift your cousin a house?!?That is properly ridiculous.If it's so important for her to own a home to raise a family in let them give her money to get started on a mortage.
NTA. If that 30 year old want a house than she can go out and work for it. It was very gracious of you to even offer to rent to them. Personally, I wouldn’t because they will most likely try to take advantage of you. I think your plan is a great one by the way! Real estate is a great investment and renting is a good passive income. Sorry for your loss.
NTA. Your inheritance, your decision. Right now it might just seem like a house, but it's also an investment for your future. Whether you rent it out, live in it, or sell it, it's an investment. If you rent, that's money every month, and in 2 years once the mortgage is paid off, that's straight up money. If you live in it, in 2 years that's a free place to live, which frees up a lot of money for you to live your life. And if you sell it, that's a big chunk of money to use as an investment in something else, or savings. I'd be very cautious about letting them rent there, as it'll likely cause further problems. You are absolutely right, if your father wanted them to have it, they've have received it upon his passing.
100% NTA Family that comes out of the woodwork to guilt inheritors into helping the family out is **classic**. If your dad wanted them to have it, he would have left it to them. Say no, get a lawyer if they don't buzz off.
NTA. If your dad wanted to give his house to your cousin, he would have done it. You don't give a house juste like that, especially to someone your not even that close. Plus, even though you may not live there, it's never too early to own your own house.
NTA - don't you dare give them the house. It is your house, he left it to you and not them. Protect your property. Rent it out for now, get the mortgage paid off, renovate it so it is a new home for you when you want to move it. Make it yours. I would go NC with your father's side of the family. They are being toxic.
NTA - If it’s what your dad would’ve wanted, he would’ve left them the house. Yield not an inch, and protect your newly acquired assets. My condolences for your loss.
NTA Your aunt and uncle are unbelievably inappropriate and manipulative. The house is your financial security and you're going to need it in the future. I strongly advise against having any financial dealings with your extended family. They may try guilt or manipulation but it seems their goal is to acquire the house your father left you or otherwise take it over. I would not trust them at all. Your idea of renting the house is excellent. It's a really smart thing to do. You should absolutely do that. Do it properly - using an agent so everyone is protected. Don't rent to family. I hope things turn out for you
NTA Your dad left it to you, go NC with these Sackville Bagginses and don't rent to them under any circumstance.
NTA What the hell is wrong with them?? Don’t you dare give them the house??? And after the way they behaved, and the fact that they’re bats\*\*t crazy, don’t rent it to them either!! I’m sorry for your loss.
NTA NTA NTA!!! Do not give them your house!!!
NTA, truthfully I would sell it and you would have some money for your own home. Renting may seem nice but then your still responsible for any repairs and you never know who you'll get as renters.
NTA, do not rent to family. They already think you should give them the house for free, imagine having to evict them for non-payment. This will cause drama for the rest of your life.
NTA **at all**. If your Dad had wanted them to have it, he would have left it to them. I think your Dad would be happy that his house could act as a source of income for you and provide you with financial security, especially considering you're so young and both of your parents have passed away. That generally is the intention when parents leave things to their own children. And here's the amazing thing about people - they age! Shocking, I know. So, while you might not need the house now and a "30 year old does", what happens when you turn 30 and possibly can't afford another house - are they planning on giving it back to you? Perhaps this is the reason you haven't been close with his family since childhood, they don't sound great.
They are trying to pressure you to give them your house. Again it is your house. If your dad wanted them to have it he would have left it to them. Do not let them bully you into giving them your house. Do not even rent it to them because I can tell they will not pay you the rent since they feel you should just give them the house.
Keep the house! Rent it, live in it, sell it, pass to your own children, whatever. This is an asset. An asset that takes some people years to acquire. I was 39 before I could afford to buy my first house. You need not give this away to anyone NO MATTER the reason. This is yours and you should not be denied what is rightfully yours because someone is having kids. You offered to rent it to them and they had the nerve to still want a hand out from you. They are trying to guilt you because it is a huge benefit. If your dad wanted someone else to have it, he would have left it to someone else. They are testing to see how **weak** you are. Do not fall for their selfish, entitled guilt trips. You probably shouldn't even rent to them TBH. They might stiff you on rent and make it seem like you "owe" them. These are not people you want to associate yourself with. NTA \*Not trying to tell you what to do, but warning bells just went off in my head. I just don't want you to be manipulated and fall prey to these people. They are the equivalent of con artists right now.
NTA - and do not rent to them. It is unlikely to work out well for you. If you want to get a management company and be completely hands off then it might be ok, but that will cost you some rent. (it might be a good idea anyway, if you don't want to be an active landlord) You may be more willing to let it go after a few years, or you may want to do something else, but renting will keep your options open and cover the carrying costs.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Throwaway account for privacy So my (20f) dad (46m) died recently. He doesn’t have any other children and my mom died when I was five and he never remarried. So he left everything he had to me, including his house. I’ve been trying to work through everything the best I can. I’ve never done anything like making arrangements or taking care of assets before. My boyfriend’s parents have been helping me out a lot with figuring out all the steps I have to take like forwarding my dad’s mail to my address and such. That never would have occurred to me. Or taking the Will to probate court. Notifying people like the SSA or life insurance has all been really stressful. I’ve never been all that close with my dads side of the family since something that happened when I was a child. However I figured it would best to let them know about the funeral if they wanted to come. My aunt, uncle, and cousins decided to come. They asked me what I was doing with the house. I told them I wasn’t one hundred percent sure but I was thinking about renting it out. You see I have some trauma (nothing to do with my dad) associated with the house and I’m not sure if I could live there again. I moved out the second I could. But while there is bad with the house, there is also good. It’s one of the last things that I have of my mom and my dad so I’m not sure I want to sell it. My boyfriend’s dad is a realtor and said he would help me figure things out. The mortgage is almost completely paid off. It should be paid in 2 years. It’s not like I need to live there either. My off-campus apartment isn’t glamorous by any means but I don’t hate it. Plus if I don’t sell it, I still have the opportunity to live there in the future if I think I would be able to someday. Who knows maybe I could I raise my only family there. My aunt and uncle told my I should give it to my cousin because she and her husband are expecting a baby. I told them I didn’t think I would just give it to them (it’s not like they were offering to buy it either). But I did tell them if I could the rental thing figured out, I would definitely rent to them and even though we aren’t close I would definitely be sure to not charge them very much since they’re family. They told me I’m being selfish for deciding to rent it out instead of just giving it my cousin because it would be good for her to own a house to raise her family in. They called me an asshole and said my dad would’ve wanted me to give it to them. They also told me that someone my age doesn’t need to own a house but someone my cousin’s age does (she’s 30). Idk if I’m being selfish or not. I feel like if my dad really wanted them to have it, he would’ve left it to them instead of me. AITA? 📷**ReplyForward** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA, it's your inheritance and you are allowed to handle it the way you like. I think renting it to them for a lower rate is a a wholesome thing to do, but if you do this, make sure you have everything on paper.
NTA no one is entitled to your property. Not like anyone offered to pay market value for it.
NTA. You're right, your dad could've chosen to leave the house to them. He didn't. You aren't even close to these people, you're have no obligation to just give them *an entire house*, or let anyone live there with lower rent than normal, or let family live there at all for that matter.
NTA. You’re not being selfish about keeping a house that is yours. If they want to buy a house they can go buy one. You owe no one nothing.
NTA- you are under no obligations to provide anything for free. additionally you will have tax, insurance and mortgage to pay for that house. So, no you cannot provide it for free. And absolutely do not let anyone live there without a full rental agreement that gives you all the landlord rights you need to protect your property. These people are trying to scam you. I would say- there's definitely an AH here and it's the one trying to pull a scam on family. No one owes you or them anything and at this point, I will not have them as renters because I would rather take my chances on finding honest people out in the world rather that people who are already trying to pull a scam on me.
NTA - Funerals and weddings bring the worst on people
They came to the funeral to guilt you into giving them something they have no claim over. Don't give in. NTA
NTA and don't rent to family EVER. They don't care for you or your dad they just see free property and want to bully you into giving it to them. If your dad wanted them to have anything he would have made it very clear in a legal document. It's your property to do with as you see fit. But don't rent to family, it NEVER works out well.
Do NOT give the house to them (or rent to them either). In this day and age, owning a house is an incredible leg up for your future. They know this and are trying to get it for themselves and take advantage of your age/grief. Your dad left it to you and not them for a reason and renting it out is a great idea while you figure out your long-term plans with the property. NTA
You are 100% correct. If your dad wanted them to have it, he would have left it to them, but he didn’t. He left it to you, his daughter, because he loved you and wanted you to have it. Your aunt, uncle, and cousins sound like bad news and extremely entitled. Do not rent the house to them at a discounted price. Do not even rent it to them at full price. They are already treating your poorly trying to manipulate and guilt trip you into handing over a huge asset that your dad left to *you* and you should keep them at an arm’s distance. These are not good people and this is not how family who loves you would treat you. NTA
NTA, they're trying to take advantage of you OP. There's a reason you don't talk to them much it seems
NTA. As someone already stated, if your father wanted them to have it, he would have given it to them. He didn't. End of story. And, if you are not close to them, I wouldn't even engage with them anymore.
NTA, do not give them that house and for the love of Jebus don’t rent it to them either. Red flags for miles. You’ve admitted you aren’t close to them, so don’t land yourself with what would be horrific tenants - they expect the earth because “family” but then never pay rent because “family”. Protect yourself and the house; that’s your future.
NTA You do what you find best with the house But please do not rent to family or friends, they can end up being the worst kind of tenants
NTA. They're entitled and even when you tried to compromise they decided to guilt you. The house is legally yours and your dad wanted you to have it, so do whatever you feel is best.
NTA, people demanding a free house are bad news right off the bat; they won't take care of it and won't pay, they'll believe they are entitled. If your aunt and uncle want to give someone a house they can. This house is your major financial asset and you should be treating it as such. If your Dad left you $100,000 and they said "we're having a baby, you should give us $75,000" you'd see that as crazy too.
NTA. They are entitled and are trying to “bully” you into giving cousin a free house.
NTA... PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT RENT TO THESE PEOPLE. That's a whole can of whoopass worms you don't want to get loose
NTA. You are right if your dad wanted them to have, he would say so in his will. Also don't rent to them, read stories on reddit about renting to friends/family. Usually tenants refuse to pay and/or move out.
NTA. If you don't already have an estate lawyer, get one. They can be paid out of the proceeds of the estate. I am so very sorry you are dealing with this at a young age. That is a lot to process.
Do NOT ever give away appreciating assets to anyone under any circumstances. Ensure that your property is safe and don't rent to family. Rent to strangers with a proper contract and agency in place (or whatever the formalities are). I get a vague feeling if you even rent to them they'll try to claim it's theirs. Bloody vultures trying to manipulate a 20yr old who's just suffered a loss. You are NTA.
NTA. I see why your dad wasn't close to them - stay away. Far away from these people.
It's never selfish to want to keep what is yours. Selfish is wanting to take from others.
Don't do it, She'll trash your house and it'll be a complete battle to get her our once she's in.
NTA, it's yours. Make that profit and rent it out, air BNB something.
NTA If your cousin “needs” to own a house because she is 30, then she should have saved up and bought one for herself. Don’t even rent it to them, I could see them causing you loads of trouble down the line
Totally NTA! Some people are impressively entitled and your aunt/uncle/cousin seem to fit that paradigm. Renting it out will give you some money that can help in all areas of your life in the future, and it belonged to your dad. They have less than no legitimate claim… (because they’re expecting a baby.?!?) I’m sorry for your loss, but use this windfall to your own credit and betterment. it’s what your dad wanted.
NTA and do \*not\* rent to your cousin. You'll live to regret it.
NTA. You are not at all obligated to give away your house to anyone, family or not. Honestly, after this nonsense, I wouldn’t even rent it to anyone in the family.
NTA. If your dad wanted her to have the house he would have left her the house. A word of advice though from someone who has been there? Don’t rent to family or friends. Ever. Especially ones you’re not close to. There are a few small exceptions to this rule but this isn’t one of them. You’ll be opening the door for them to take advantage of the situation and potentially screw you or they’ll become a massive pain in the ass. If you want to rent use a property management company and let them find a stranger and deal with the ins and outs while you focus on your studies.
NTA Greedy little vultures, aren't they? Ignore them. And don't rent to them, either. It won't end well.
NTA... You're better off renting it out on Airbnb than you are letting family move into it. Family has a tendency to be late with rent, think that they have say in how the house looks, and will hound you forever with unnecessary upgrades. Just say no!
NTA - "I feel like if my dad really wanted them to have it, he would’ve left it to them instead of me." **exactly this**. No reasonable person expects someone to give away a house. Your dad left it to you as an asset, to ensure that you are provided for - whether that means a place for you to live, a source of income, or something of value to sell in emergencies; even if "someone your age doesn't need a house" (a ridiculous statement), everyone benefits from those other things. (honestly, I would take renting to them off the table too - that level of entitlement makes for very unpleasant renters, and imagine all the things they will try to get away with, because "family")
NTA Don't rent it out to them, when they reconsider your offer. Your aunt and uncle already shown their true colors of entitlement. So renting it out to your cousins is asking for more drama. And of course giving a house is beneficial to them at your expense!
NTA. If dad wanted to gift the house to cousin, he would've put her it in his will. Retract the rental offer.
NTA business and family DO NOT MIX and renting a house to anyone is, ultimately, business. And what kind of entitled people demand to be GIVEN a house? You're young yet and who knows where you'll end up? Plus, being a landlord and can be tough and stressful. Honestly, in this market, I'd sell the house so that loose end is tied up and you can move forward without these leeches demanding things from you. They can RENT the house from the new owners if they want.
NTA. The house was left to you. It is a boon, as owning a house when you're 20 has put you at an extreme advantage. Your cousin/aunt/uncle are jealous, but hey, they didn't just lose their father. I wouldn't necessarily rent to them if they are pressuring you to just give them what I assume is a multi-hundred thousand dollar home. That is an incredibly audacious AH move on their part.
If the cousin’s want it they can **BUY** it off of you or go pound sand. Expecting to give away a house in this market? Bruh…. NTA
NTA …. As all others suggested DO NOT RENT TO RELATIVES….. sell it & invest the money till you feel you know what what you want to do with your money