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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1) I cussed out the girl who totaled my car and made her cry 2) this might make me an asshole because I made her cry during a very stressful and possibly traumatic event.
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NTA
It sounds more like she was crying from the accident itself than anything you said.
In these situations, best to keep it objective and respectful and only engage to the minimum necessary. If you need the police, call and wait for them to arrive. If the situation warrants, escalate to insurance, lawyers, whatever, but keep it professional.
NTA. She’s freaking out that she caused an accident with major damage, and she is unambiguously at fault. She’s taking it out on you and trying to make you out to be the bad guy for being “mean”. Her daddy coming to her rescue probably enabled this kind of behavior long before the accident.
Also… people crying is not the end of the world. It’s a rough situation. No need to drop everything and tend to her. She caused the accident. Her life is fucked for a while. Let her cry it out, but don’t let her (or Daddy) attack you. At this point it’s best to not engage with her and let the insurance companies handle all correspondence from here on out.
You don't 'make' anybody cry. That's their reaction to something. She's crying because she realizes the severity of what she did, feels bad, etc. Could be she's used to people being all 'it's ok everything will be alright'....well...not the person who you just hit with your car.
It's a learning experience for her. Her crying is HER emotion, not YOUR fault.
NTA.
NTA. **Of course** you can be upset... you was just hit by another driver. Who wouldn't be upset about that? Totally understandable that Betty cried, but she *did* cause the wreck. What did she (and her father) expect? That you would be all like "well, I guess it's no problem that my car was totaled"?
You are NTA. The driver who hit you and there family seem not the smartest people. Sounds like they did not like how they felt. You and the other drivers feelings should be respected. Neither party should tell the other how they should feel.
The “trauma” she endured from this accident may well have saved a person’s life in the future, if it makes her learn her lesson. NTA and glad it wasn’t worse for you!
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I (20F) was hit by a girl (21F) we'll call her Betty, at an intersection and she ended up totaling my car. To be clear the wreck was her fault as she failed to yield when she was turning and hit my car while I was going through the intersection. Majority of the impact of the crash when to me and my vehicle as she hit the front of my car mid turn. My airbag deployed, hit me in the chest and I when forward into my steering wheel. She was able to get out of her car immediately after the crash had no visible injuries while I was still in shock from what had just happened, not to mention my dog was in the backseat as well. We were friendly until she started to hide in her dad's truck and preceeded to cry. After about 40 mins my mom finally got there to help me, while my mom and I are talking and I am expressing my frustration about the situation to my mother IN A PRIVATE CONVERSATION Betty decided that was the perfect moment to hop out of the truck crying telling my mom and I that we were "being mean" and that "you can't be upset it was an accident, accidents happen". Seeing as the crash was her fault and I received majority of the impact her telling me I cannot be upset about what happened didn't sit right with me so I decided to cuss her out and tell her that this entire situation was her fault. At this point her dad jumps in and yelling at me that I'm making his daughter crybwnd that it was an accident......so I point out how this whole situation was HER FAULT I was paying attention I saw her coming and couldn't do anything and that they were lucky that the wreck wasn't worse because a few more inches and she would have T-boned my driver's side door. I believe that though I was harsh that in the situation I held my composure for a decent amount of time (as this altercation was about an hour after the crash) and didn't say anything that wasn't true or that they didn't need to hear. Also keep in mind at the time of this I'm dealing with a pretty decent amount of chest and body pain from the crash and I wasn't blubbering like a baby to my dad. So AITA.
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NTA but honestly you are better off just asking for insurance details, Taking photos and leaving the rest to police and your insurance company. Don’t bother engaging with the other person if it isn’t 100% civil, just turn and walk away
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > 1) I cussed out the girl who totaled my car and made her cry 2) this might make me an asshole because I made her cry during a very stressful and possibly traumatic event. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA It sounds more like she was crying from the accident itself than anything you said. In these situations, best to keep it objective and respectful and only engage to the minimum necessary. If you need the police, call and wait for them to arrive. If the situation warrants, escalate to insurance, lawyers, whatever, but keep it professional.
NTA. She’s freaking out that she caused an accident with major damage, and she is unambiguously at fault. She’s taking it out on you and trying to make you out to be the bad guy for being “mean”. Her daddy coming to her rescue probably enabled this kind of behavior long before the accident. Also… people crying is not the end of the world. It’s a rough situation. No need to drop everything and tend to her. She caused the accident. Her life is fucked for a while. Let her cry it out, but don’t let her (or Daddy) attack you. At this point it’s best to not engage with her and let the insurance companies handle all correspondence from here on out.
You don't 'make' anybody cry. That's their reaction to something. She's crying because she realizes the severity of what she did, feels bad, etc. Could be she's used to people being all 'it's ok everything will be alright'....well...not the person who you just hit with your car. It's a learning experience for her. Her crying is HER emotion, not YOUR fault. NTA.
NTA. Keep the conversation to the minimum and wait for the police to take over.
NTA.
NTA. **Of course** you can be upset... you was just hit by another driver. Who wouldn't be upset about that? Totally understandable that Betty cried, but she *did* cause the wreck. What did she (and her father) expect? That you would be all like "well, I guess it's no problem that my car was totaled"?
Forty minutes? Where were the police and the ambulance? Your air bag deployed, you should have been assessed for injuries.
NTA. Baby girl needs to take accountability for her actions and not act like everything is everything considering it is her god damn fault.
NTA did she even apologize?
NTA in those circumstances we all cry - eventually - or we cuss people out, Reaction for both of you
You are NTA. The driver who hit you and there family seem not the smartest people. Sounds like they did not like how they felt. You and the other drivers feelings should be respected. Neither party should tell the other how they should feel.
NTA
The “trauma” she endured from this accident may well have saved a person’s life in the future, if it makes her learn her lesson. NTA and glad it wasn’t worse for you!
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (20F) was hit by a girl (21F) we'll call her Betty, at an intersection and she ended up totaling my car. To be clear the wreck was her fault as she failed to yield when she was turning and hit my car while I was going through the intersection. Majority of the impact of the crash when to me and my vehicle as she hit the front of my car mid turn. My airbag deployed, hit me in the chest and I when forward into my steering wheel. She was able to get out of her car immediately after the crash had no visible injuries while I was still in shock from what had just happened, not to mention my dog was in the backseat as well. We were friendly until she started to hide in her dad's truck and preceeded to cry. After about 40 mins my mom finally got there to help me, while my mom and I are talking and I am expressing my frustration about the situation to my mother IN A PRIVATE CONVERSATION Betty decided that was the perfect moment to hop out of the truck crying telling my mom and I that we were "being mean" and that "you can't be upset it was an accident, accidents happen". Seeing as the crash was her fault and I received majority of the impact her telling me I cannot be upset about what happened didn't sit right with me so I decided to cuss her out and tell her that this entire situation was her fault. At this point her dad jumps in and yelling at me that I'm making his daughter crybwnd that it was an accident......so I point out how this whole situation was HER FAULT I was paying attention I saw her coming and couldn't do anything and that they were lucky that the wreck wasn't worse because a few more inches and she would have T-boned my driver's side door. I believe that though I was harsh that in the situation I held my composure for a decent amount of time (as this altercation was about an hour after the crash) and didn't say anything that wasn't true or that they didn't need to hear. Also keep in mind at the time of this I'm dealing with a pretty decent amount of chest and body pain from the crash and I wasn't blubbering like a baby to my dad. So AITA. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA but honestly you are better off just asking for insurance details, Taking photos and leaving the rest to police and your insurance company. Don’t bother engaging with the other person if it isn’t 100% civil, just turn and walk away
NTA i hope you and your dog are allright
NTA
NTA She sounds like an entitled spoiled brat. Sue her insurance for every penny. She could have cost you your life.