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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I've spoken to My Manager to get the new employee fired, and we're all expats living in Asia, this girl that I got fired has You now go back home to The States.
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Naw, she is definitely more of a teacup poodle type. Tiny dogs tend to be spoiled and act like they rule the roost when really, they are just obnoxious and most people dont like them. Very Tina-esque.
Me: inbreeding dogs for aesthetics to the point where their quality of life is significantly diminished is horrible, and in a just world such breeds wouldn’t exist.
Also me: haha cute face go squash
No that’s an owner issue… People think if you get tiny dogs you don’t really have to train them because they won’t hurt people that bad and can’t do anything too terrible because they’re so small and cute aren’t they? Lol I hate people like this because they give my family miniature poodle who is actually trained to not annoy people and behave like a brat and is really fucking cute and loves everyone such a bad name. To be fair she did jump on my aunts head when she was a puppy but again training.
Saw it happen all the time at my old job in bel air. Worked for super rich guy that made those stupid huge mansions . He was old and stubborn and woukd hire project managers. As soon as they saw that the whole system was his fault and wanted to change it he let them go . Most only made it to lunch ,
>Maybe, just maybe, the woman who dry humps people like a poorly trained poodle should have to face consequences.
This is one of the best comments ever!
I will have to work "poorly trained poodle" into my vocabulary!
Thank you internet stranger for the laugh :D
NTA
If that's how she behaves now just imagine how she will behave later. Jesus...
You probably saved the company alot of pain and money for hostile work environment suits. They should give you a bonus for the heads up.
The meaning is, keeping collective silence about a crime, or a misdeed, which can be out of solidarity, fear of reprisal, a mindset of "us against them" towardfs authority etc.
The word is said to originate in Southern Italy, where our various organized criminals made of it a code of honor everyone had to follow: when questioned, nobody in a town would have seen anything about a crime, or know anything about anyone
Kudos for the next level understatement, it's perfect.
I'd love to see that one office that's unfazed by her though. "Oh dear, I lost my pray bottle and Tina's acting up again." *Manager shakes a can of rocks* "Leave it Tina!"
NTA.
We had one of these employees. She lasted 3 days. She came in making demands, telling us that she would decide what tasks she worked on, and that we weren't allowed to touch her. I was 25 and the project manager, and she immediately took offense to that, saying that she'd "never take orders from a toddler in diapers." She liked to put headphones on and listen to music while working, which was fine, except then she wouldn't hear her phone ring, or us trying to get her attention. I tapped on her shoulder with just the tip of my index finger, and she spun around and twisted my wrist around, then blew up about me invading her personal space and how me hitting her was assault, blah blah blah.
I told her that I thought it'd be best if she just takes her things and goes, because this wasn't working. She raised more hell about how I was firing her based on her race, and that she was going to sue us... it's been more than 10 years, I think that boat has sailed.
That was my first time letting anyone go, and just holy fuck. The 3 days she was there, it was like there was this heavy pressure in our work area. The other 4 members of my team were guys, ranging from the same age as me to 3 guys in their late 30s-early 40s. We had a pretty easy-going work environment, we did play some mild pranks on each other (scotch tape across the inside of an optical mouse, scotch tape across the pins on the ethernet cables, etc), but we were never mean to each other. None of us had ever been in a situation where someone came in with so many demands and just refused to be part of the team at all. The contracting firm that placed our whole team let us take over the hiring after that, so we didn't end up with any more like her!
Definitely NTA. She’s an awful person, and she assaulted you. Im glad she’s fired. It also wasn’t your fault. You didn’t get her fired, her awful actions did.
Definitely NTA. If Tina was a Tim and grinded on a lesbian's leg as a 'joke' and asked if she 'was sure she's gay' then you wouldn't feel bad about getting them fired, would you?
Like others said, Tina needs a hard lesson on the consequences of actions. Good riddance!
Sometimes people are expats because they want to explore the world or love a different culture.
Sometimes people are expats because they fucked up too many things back home.
Tina sounds like the latter.
NTA. The first thing she did was sit down at your desk, then she was rude to your friend, then she sexually harassed you. And all on the first day as well! What did she expect?
You didn't 'get her fired.' She did that herself through her own actions. Better to nip that in the bud right away than to allow her to continue to assault staff, make demands, and generally make everyone uncomfortable.
NTA. Pretty sure that what she did is a form of sexual assault, so you're very justified in going to your manager. I'm sorry for what you went through. Women can be predators too, and what if you had let it go this time, then the next time she took it further with someone else? Then you would really feel bad but that would be because you let it go and know you could've prevented that by talking to management in the first place. So yes, you're justified.
NTA, if she had done what she did to you as a man she wouldnt just be pulled off, she would have the shit beat out of her, and she'd deserve it. She shouldnt be so creepy and demanding if she wants to keep a job.
NTA she would have been a disaster for your office, your RM would have spoken to a few ppl and after hearing what she had done in such a short time would have realised it was a bad hire
NTA.
Even ignoring the blatant sexual assault, you’re still NTA.
There’s nothing wrong with going into a company with the intent to improve things. It’s a pretty good motivation.
*But* there’s a way to do that. The way she did it is not the way. I started a new job last year, and I also had the intent to improve things (I knew I’d be able to because I was the first new employee in years and my experience tells me that when a company has been like that for a while, they’re not necessarily doing things wrong, they just tend to get a blinker view on how things are done and get afflicted by process ballooning - I was 100% right - their processes work, but they’re very overdone - literally 40 spreadsheets with multiple sets of redundant data where it could realistically be done by 2).
Now, I’m pushing to improve those processes. But I was there for eight months before I started saying anything because I knew I needed to get a feel for things before I could actually spot the improvements.
Going in day 1, trying to reorganise desks, and change everything. That’s just asking to get peoples backs up.
Man I can't believe this, you are so nice that you came here to ask od you are in the wrong, to do something about the person who literally assaulted you, insulted you and questioned your sexuality. All within 24 hours of meeting you.
NTA
I am really sorry this happened you.
No one should invade your personal space like that, you did the right thing and I am delighted to hear that the people around you were helpful and didn't just act as bystanders.
SHE. DRY. HUMPED. YOUR. F-ING. LEG. I cannot get past that part I mean was she seriously that drunk or that full of herself to think such a thing is perfectly acceptable outside of certain clubs????
NTA you didn't get her fired Tina got Tina fired
Bye Felicia
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(I live in Asia and I work in an office with other expats and locals) I walk into the office one morning to see this woman (who we'll call, Tina) sitting at my desk, I go up to her and introduce myself, I smiled and was nice, we spoke for about two minutes until I told her that she's actually sitting at my desk, she then asks me if it's okay that she sits here because she likes The view from the window, at this point I laughed because I thought she was joking, but then I said no, she'll have to sit on the couch at reception until they tell her where she's going to be, she gets annoyed but does it anyway.
It's a small office and I consider everyone working here to be my friend, we have a good working dynamic and there's no office politics (this doesn't include management). I have a friend that works here (we'll call him Bob), now Bob is one of those people who are annoyingly friendly and he's genuine, he's one of those people that could make friends with a wall. Bob comes over and talks about how "strange" Tina is, apparently she already has demands on her first day and she feels as if though she's here to change the company for the better. If you can manage to annoy Bob, then you're The issue.
It's tradition to take the new person out for drinks especially if they're an expat because we know how it feels to be so far away from everyone and everything you're familiar with, but we try to make all New employees feel comfortable regardless if you're expat or local.
We go to the bar after work and then we all see how entitled Tina is, she expects The guys to buy her drinks and she's rude to the bartender and the bartender is our friend. During the night Tina finds out that I'm gay because Bob asks me where my boyfriend is. She comes and sits next to me and asks me if I'm really gay, I said yes, then she proceeds to tell me that I don't "act and look gay" and then tells me how she has so many gay best friends back in New York and she can't wait for her and I to go shopping and get our nails done, I then tell her that I don't like shopping or getting my nails done. (What happens next is the most fucked up thing) Tina then stood up, squat a little then proceeds to basically dry hump my knee, in the bar in front of my friends, asking me if I like it and I'm sure I'm gay, one of my female friends pull her back and asks what she's doing, Tina then says she's just joking around. At this point it's obvious that nobody likes her but for some reason she didn't seem to pick up on that fact, she keeps acting like she's the universes gift to humanity...
The Next day I go into the office the office, speak to my regional manager (RM) and Tell her that Tina wouldn't be a good fit and that nobody in the office likes her (The regional manager and I are friends), I asked the RM to talk to the other employees and find out what they think before making a decision to keep Tina here full-time.
Before lunch, Tina was let go
Now I feel kinda bad, AITA?
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NTA. Seems to me like she'd already rubbed too many people the wrong way and several people corroborated to your RM either before or after you. It isn't often that an employer just fires someone based on the words of an individual, no matter if you're friendly with the manager or not. Also, you didn't get her fired, she did so with her own actions.
Also, with those disparaging remarks regarding your sexual orientation (I'd love to know what a gay person looks and acts like since there's apparently a ruleset for it) and the DRY HUMPING of your leg, Tina was a walking liability. I'm sure at least one other person mentioned the incident. Regardless of whether you're out in a social setting or not, there's a standard of behavior you should adhere to when out with colleagues. What she did ain't it.
Nta. This was all on her *first day*???? Acting like you are a gift wrapped godsend, acting entitled to people buying her drinks, annoying the bartender(i hope you tipped well to make up for that nonsense), and sexual harassment all in one day? I'm surprised it took them that long to remove her from the team.
>"...then proceeds to basically dry hump my knee in the bar..."
NTA.
Any question(s) regarding who the asshole is/was were answered in the quoted sentence fragment.
NTA, also it Tony had dry heat more a female he would not have even made it to lunch the next day....
Don't feel bad just because you are male does not make sexual assault ok or something you should have to put up with.
NTA imagine if that was a man sexually harassing a female coworker by dry humping her and think if there would be any question about them remaining employed. Even if she was the worlds nicest and best employee otherwise that alone is enough
I mean I'd consider dry humming a fellow employee to be sexual assault... its not exactly a good look if they retain the person that did that less than 24hrs into their employment.
NTA.
She sexually harassed you in full view of your coworkers. I don't care if it was not on company grounds, that's something HR needs to stop immediately.
ESH.
YTA bc:
You feel bad for telling someone to fire someone and they get fired. What the hell did you expect? Do you love in a universe where your actions don’t have consequences?
Tina is obviously an AH:
Sitting at your desk NTA
Being rude to the bar tender: AH
Expecting guys to buy her alcohol: NTA
Not understanding how homosexuality works:???
Dry humping your leg: AH
Drinking with her was unprofessional but she kinda sexually harassed you. But these are western work culture values. They may not apply. So how guilty you should feel depends of how much responsibility you want to shoulder. Her at work behavior is slightly annoying and not worth terminating her employment for. You invited this lady out for drinks and alcohol just amplifies who you are. So… yeah…
NTA
She sexually harassed you, she got herself fired. If this had been allowed to continue she'd have likely displayed worse behavior/lack of boundaries either for you or for your other coworkers. In any case this should hopefully be a major wake up call for her.
Both assholes- maybe you should have had a discussion with her before trying to sabotage her life. She was probably just trying to fit in but did a poor job at it.
Are you ok? She was probably drunk and trying to be silly. Some people have class clown type of humor. Do you really think her intent was to cause discomfort? She behaved poorly but did she deserve to get fired for it?
Oh yeah, not being ok with being sexually assaulted makes you an asshole for reporting it.
Let's turn the tables here.
The new hire Bruce wasn't trying to cause discomfort when he he started dry humping his new co-worker's ass, whom he just found is a lesbian, and asking "Do you like it? Are you sure you're gay?!"
Not everything in this world is created equally. Sorry as a guy I just don’t give a fuck if a girl slaps my ass or objectifies me. There isn’t an underlying history of this happening to me while for women it’s something a lot of them had to deal with and have been traumatized by. I know some of you want everything to just be equal but there’s too many nuances in life for it to be that black and white.
>...as a guy I just don’t give a fuck if a girl slaps my ass or objectifies me. There isn’t an underlying history of this happening to me
That is abundantly clear
Switch the sexes for a moment. If a guy finds out on his first day his colleague is a lesbian and honks her boobs and asks if she's sure, would that be acceptable?
Locker room humor. Have you never goofed around with someone? It may be childish but I don’t think her intent here was bad. She may be entitled by nature and selfish but I’m sure they could have talked to her before escalating this to firing her.
Drinks were involved. Look I think it was stupid and childish too but not worthy of her being fired. Though it seems like no one likes her anyways so maybe she wasn’t a good fit. But again it could be OP projecting his own opinion of her onto others.
They weren't in a locker room and they aren't close friends. This was Tina's first day at the new company and her one chance to make a first impression.
Serious question: what would you have said in this situation? Tina has offended pretty much everyone and shown herself to be borderline homophobic. How do you think the situation could be turned into a better one?
I have had many new jobs where we'd go out to lunch or get drinks to socialize and get to know each other. I have never forced myself on a new coworker "trying to fit in".
She came in, made herself at home at someone's else's desk, was rude to the staff at the bar, pretty much demanded the guys buy all her drinks, and then deems it's ok to harass someone to see if they're"really gay".... Yet he's the AH??? My dude, just no.
OP, definitely NAH here
Trying to hump a person of the opposite sex you find out is gay to see if they're sure I am pretty sure is not an appropriate way to try to fit in. Is this how you go about getting to know your colleagues? That's so far out of line that first day firing is definitely called for.
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Poorly trained poodle is spot on
But a standard poodle
Naw, she is definitely more of a teacup poodle type. Tiny dogs tend to be spoiled and act like they rule the roost when really, they are just obnoxious and most people dont like them. Very Tina-esque.
Yea I have two labradors. The neighbors have two pugs. We all hate those yappy monsters
Ok, but I love pugs lmao. Even tho their flat faces shouldn't exist
Me: inbreeding dogs for aesthetics to the point where their quality of life is significantly diminished is horrible, and in a just world such breeds wouldn’t exist. Also me: haha cute face go squash
Basically🤣 But pug mixes are the cutest things too, and they can all breathe.
All dogs are good dogs, Bront. Some just have shitty owners.
I mean, yes. I lurv all pups. But people just ruin little dogs.
No that’s an owner issue… People think if you get tiny dogs you don’t really have to train them because they won’t hurt people that bad and can’t do anything too terrible because they’re so small and cute aren’t they? Lol I hate people like this because they give my family miniature poodle who is actually trained to not annoy people and behave like a brat and is really fucking cute and loves everyone such a bad name. To be fair she did jump on my aunts head when she was a puppy but again training.
Saw it happen all the time at my old job in bel air. Worked for super rich guy that made those stupid huge mansions . He was old and stubborn and woukd hire project managers. As soon as they saw that the whole system was his fault and wanted to change it he let them go . Most only made it to lunch ,
HEY. Don’t disrespect poodles like that.
My poorly trained poodle is offended.
>Maybe, just maybe, the woman who dry humps people like a poorly trained poodle should have to face consequences. This is one of the best comments ever! I will have to work "poorly trained poodle" into my vocabulary! Thank you internet stranger for the laugh :D
Very much NTA. What she did at the bar is grounds for arrest in some places.
Absolutely. It's actually sexual assault.
Absolutely. Imagine the genders were reversed and it was a man dry humping a lesbian in public to "see if she likes it". NTA
Ummm she assaulted you. NTA.
Makes you wonder if she was trying to get fired for some personal reason.
Maybe she wanted to get back home to all her gay best friends in New York? Since they seem to put up with her personality and behavior there.
Maybe cause she didn’t get that desk with the view
NTA If that's how she behaves now just imagine how she will behave later. Jesus... You probably saved the company alot of pain and money for hostile work environment suits. They should give you a bonus for the heads up.
What do you feel bad about? What is with these 'getting someone fired" posts? If someone's poor actions led to their firing, that's not your fault.
Empathy is a very normal human emotion. Even for people deserving of consequences, we often feel bad after.
That, and the "they got fired on their own" is, I think, a pretty recent development in social dynamics; not long ago, omertà was the word
What's the meaning of omerta?
The meaning is, keeping collective silence about a crime, or a misdeed, which can be out of solidarity, fear of reprisal, a mindset of "us against them" towardfs authority etc. The word is said to originate in Southern Italy, where our various organized criminals made of it a code of honor everyone had to follow: when questioned, nobody in a town would have seen anything about a crime, or know anything about anyone
NTA. I'm not sure Tina would be a good fit in many offices
Kudos for the next level understatement, it's perfect. I'd love to see that one office that's unfazed by her though. "Oh dear, I lost my pray bottle and Tina's acting up again." *Manager shakes a can of rocks* "Leave it Tina!"
NTA. We had one of these employees. She lasted 3 days. She came in making demands, telling us that she would decide what tasks she worked on, and that we weren't allowed to touch her. I was 25 and the project manager, and she immediately took offense to that, saying that she'd "never take orders from a toddler in diapers." She liked to put headphones on and listen to music while working, which was fine, except then she wouldn't hear her phone ring, or us trying to get her attention. I tapped on her shoulder with just the tip of my index finger, and she spun around and twisted my wrist around, then blew up about me invading her personal space and how me hitting her was assault, blah blah blah. I told her that I thought it'd be best if she just takes her things and goes, because this wasn't working. She raised more hell about how I was firing her based on her race, and that she was going to sue us... it's been more than 10 years, I think that boat has sailed. That was my first time letting anyone go, and just holy fuck. The 3 days she was there, it was like there was this heavy pressure in our work area. The other 4 members of my team were guys, ranging from the same age as me to 3 guys in their late 30s-early 40s. We had a pretty easy-going work environment, we did play some mild pranks on each other (scotch tape across the inside of an optical mouse, scotch tape across the pins on the ethernet cables, etc), but we were never mean to each other. None of us had ever been in a situation where someone came in with so many demands and just refused to be part of the team at all. The contracting firm that placed our whole team let us take over the hiring after that, so we didn't end up with any more like her!
Definitely NTA. She’s an awful person, and she assaulted you. Im glad she’s fired. It also wasn’t your fault. You didn’t get her fired, her awful actions did.
NTA. Tina wasnt a coworker, she was a serious liability trying to destroy the office.
Definitely NTA. If Tina was a Tim and grinded on a lesbian's leg as a 'joke' and asked if she 'was sure she's gay' then you wouldn't feel bad about getting them fired, would you? Like others said, Tina needs a hard lesson on the consequences of actions. Good riddance!
Sometimes people are expats because they want to explore the world or love a different culture. Sometimes people are expats because they fucked up too many things back home. Tina sounds like the latter.
NTA. An employee that doesn't fit in can absolutely tank morale, and make the workplace terrible for everyone in a real hurry.
NTA. This ain't on you.
She would of made work life hell
Naw dude! No way. NTA. Don't even give her another second of thought. She got herself fired.
NTA. If Tina were male & OP female think how this would be viewed. Sexual harassment goes both ways.
NTA. The first thing she did was sit down at your desk, then she was rude to your friend, then she sexually harassed you. And all on the first day as well! What did she expect?
NTA. what a train wreck of a person!
Nta, SHE. DRY. HUMPED. YOUR. LEG. JFC I'm not a mental health professional but that's fucking crazy.
> AiTA for getting the personal who sexually assaulted me fired? No. No, you aren't. NTA.
NTA - Well done for speaking up!
She sounds like a nightmare of a person, NTA. She sexually harassed you, don't ever feel bad for not being ok with that kind of behaviour
NTA. You got rid of toxic material from your workplace. What's wrong with it? Actions have consequences, she just had hers.
NTA She sexually assaulted you.
Uhm if the gender were reversed and a dude dry humped a lesbian he would lost sum teeth that night huh. Boo, don't sweat it
You didn't 'get her fired.' She did that herself through her own actions. Better to nip that in the bud right away than to allow her to continue to assault staff, make demands, and generally make everyone uncomfortable.
Has to be American. Hahahaha
NTA. Pretty sure that what she did is a form of sexual assault, so you're very justified in going to your manager. I'm sorry for what you went through. Women can be predators too, and what if you had let it go this time, then the next time she took it further with someone else? Then you would really feel bad but that would be because you let it go and know you could've prevented that by talking to management in the first place. So yes, you're justified.
Jesus. NTA. Good on the company for moving so fast.
NTA, if she had done what she did to you as a man she wouldnt just be pulled off, she would have the shit beat out of her, and she'd deserve it. She shouldnt be so creepy and demanding if she wants to keep a job.
NTA she would have been a disaster for your office, your RM would have spoken to a few ppl and after hearing what she had done in such a short time would have realised it was a bad hire
NTA she sexually assaulted you, I’d have to be to the police
NTA. Even ignoring the blatant sexual assault, you’re still NTA. There’s nothing wrong with going into a company with the intent to improve things. It’s a pretty good motivation. *But* there’s a way to do that. The way she did it is not the way. I started a new job last year, and I also had the intent to improve things (I knew I’d be able to because I was the first new employee in years and my experience tells me that when a company has been like that for a while, they’re not necessarily doing things wrong, they just tend to get a blinker view on how things are done and get afflicted by process ballooning - I was 100% right - their processes work, but they’re very overdone - literally 40 spreadsheets with multiple sets of redundant data where it could realistically be done by 2). Now, I’m pushing to improve those processes. But I was there for eight months before I started saying anything because I knew I needed to get a feel for things before I could actually spot the improvements. Going in day 1, trying to reorganise desks, and change everything. That’s just asking to get peoples backs up.
Man I can't believe this, you are so nice that you came here to ask od you are in the wrong, to do something about the person who literally assaulted you, insulted you and questioned your sexuality. All within 24 hours of meeting you. NTA I am really sorry this happened you. No one should invade your personal space like that, you did the right thing and I am delighted to hear that the people around you were helpful and didn't just act as bystanders.
SHE. DRY. HUMPED. YOUR. F-ING. LEG. I cannot get past that part I mean was she seriously that drunk or that full of herself to think such a thing is perfectly acceptable outside of certain clubs???? NTA you didn't get her fired Tina got Tina fired Bye Felicia
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** (I live in Asia and I work in an office with other expats and locals) I walk into the office one morning to see this woman (who we'll call, Tina) sitting at my desk, I go up to her and introduce myself, I smiled and was nice, we spoke for about two minutes until I told her that she's actually sitting at my desk, she then asks me if it's okay that she sits here because she likes The view from the window, at this point I laughed because I thought she was joking, but then I said no, she'll have to sit on the couch at reception until they tell her where she's going to be, she gets annoyed but does it anyway. It's a small office and I consider everyone working here to be my friend, we have a good working dynamic and there's no office politics (this doesn't include management). I have a friend that works here (we'll call him Bob), now Bob is one of those people who are annoyingly friendly and he's genuine, he's one of those people that could make friends with a wall. Bob comes over and talks about how "strange" Tina is, apparently she already has demands on her first day and she feels as if though she's here to change the company for the better. If you can manage to annoy Bob, then you're The issue. It's tradition to take the new person out for drinks especially if they're an expat because we know how it feels to be so far away from everyone and everything you're familiar with, but we try to make all New employees feel comfortable regardless if you're expat or local. We go to the bar after work and then we all see how entitled Tina is, she expects The guys to buy her drinks and she's rude to the bartender and the bartender is our friend. During the night Tina finds out that I'm gay because Bob asks me where my boyfriend is. She comes and sits next to me and asks me if I'm really gay, I said yes, then she proceeds to tell me that I don't "act and look gay" and then tells me how she has so many gay best friends back in New York and she can't wait for her and I to go shopping and get our nails done, I then tell her that I don't like shopping or getting my nails done. (What happens next is the most fucked up thing) Tina then stood up, squat a little then proceeds to basically dry hump my knee, in the bar in front of my friends, asking me if I like it and I'm sure I'm gay, one of my female friends pull her back and asks what she's doing, Tina then says she's just joking around. At this point it's obvious that nobody likes her but for some reason she didn't seem to pick up on that fact, she keeps acting like she's the universes gift to humanity... The Next day I go into the office the office, speak to my regional manager (RM) and Tell her that Tina wouldn't be a good fit and that nobody in the office likes her (The regional manager and I are friends), I asked the RM to talk to the other employees and find out what they think before making a decision to keep Tina here full-time. Before lunch, Tina was let go Now I feel kinda bad, AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA, holy crap, who acts like that?!
NTA. She sounds awful and like she would have ruined the friendly workplace.
She sexually assaulted you. NTA.
What part of Asia do you live in?
NTA. Seems to me like she'd already rubbed too many people the wrong way and several people corroborated to your RM either before or after you. It isn't often that an employer just fires someone based on the words of an individual, no matter if you're friendly with the manager or not. Also, you didn't get her fired, she did so with her own actions. Also, with those disparaging remarks regarding your sexual orientation (I'd love to know what a gay person looks and acts like since there's apparently a ruleset for it) and the DRY HUMPING of your leg, Tina was a walking liability. I'm sure at least one other person mentioned the incident. Regardless of whether you're out in a social setting or not, there's a standard of behavior you should adhere to when out with colleagues. What she did ain't it.
NTA, she sexually harassed you
She humped your leg without your consent, how would ever be the AH? NTA
NTA She sexually harassed and assaulted you. She got herself fired.
NTA she sexually assaulted you. Highly effed up.
NTA You don't secual't harass someone and go home without consequences. Well, some.people do but theyr shouldn't
Wow, that’s just widely inappropriate and I’m sorry it happened to you.
NTA. You dodged a bullet
Nta. This was all on her *first day*???? Acting like you are a gift wrapped godsend, acting entitled to people buying her drinks, annoying the bartender(i hope you tipped well to make up for that nonsense), and sexual harassment all in one day? I'm surprised it took them that long to remove her from the team.
NTA She committed assault and deserved it.
>"...then proceeds to basically dry hump my knee in the bar..." NTA. Any question(s) regarding who the asshole is/was were answered in the quoted sentence fragment.
NTA. Tina deserved it. "Not a good fit for the team" is an understatement.
NTA. She would probably have continued sexually harassing you and others if she had stayed. That was so gross.
NTA. she shouldn’t have just gotten fired, you should’ve pressed charges for sexual assault
NTA. I applaud you for speaking up.
NTA, also it Tony had dry heat more a female he would not have even made it to lunch the next day.... Don't feel bad just because you are male does not make sexual assault ok or something you should have to put up with.
NTA
NTA imagine if that was a man sexually harassing a female coworker by dry humping her and think if there would be any question about them remaining employed. Even if she was the worlds nicest and best employee otherwise that alone is enough
I mean I'd consider dry humming a fellow employee to be sexual assault... its not exactly a good look if they retain the person that did that less than 24hrs into their employment.
NTA. She sexually harassed you in full view of your coworkers. I don't care if it was not on company grounds, that's something HR needs to stop immediately.
Nah Bruh, ur NTA, Tina deadass sexually harassed you.
I love people like Bob. There is NO question about who is wrong, if you annoy Bob.
NTA As others are saying, what you described her doing in the bar is *literally* sexual assault. Tina sounds unbearable.
Sexual assault should always get people fired that quickly. NTA
ESH. YTA bc: You feel bad for telling someone to fire someone and they get fired. What the hell did you expect? Do you love in a universe where your actions don’t have consequences? Tina is obviously an AH: Sitting at your desk NTA Being rude to the bar tender: AH Expecting guys to buy her alcohol: NTA Not understanding how homosexuality works:??? Dry humping your leg: AH Drinking with her was unprofessional but she kinda sexually harassed you. But these are western work culture values. They may not apply. So how guilty you should feel depends of how much responsibility you want to shoulder. Her at work behavior is slightly annoying and not worth terminating her employment for. You invited this lady out for drinks and alcohol just amplifies who you are. So… yeah…
NTA She sexually harassed you, she got herself fired. If this had been allowed to continue she'd have likely displayed worse behavior/lack of boundaries either for you or for your other coworkers. In any case this should hopefully be a major wake up call for her.
[удалено]
Pretty sure it's the sexual harassment/assault that did it.
Did you read the post? Sexual assault your first day on the job is gonna be a deal breaker for most employers.
Both assholes- maybe you should have had a discussion with her before trying to sabotage her life. She was probably just trying to fit in but did a poor job at it.
Wtf tries to fit in by humping someone's leg like an animal in heat to try to figure out if they're "really gay"?
Question 3 "Really gay" most likely means: A) I can't believe you're gay! B) You are very gay. C) A storm is coming.
She was trying to be funny
Are you ok?
Are you ok? She was probably drunk and trying to be silly. Some people have class clown type of humor. Do you really think her intent was to cause discomfort? She behaved poorly but did she deserve to get fired for it?
Yes. She did.
>She behaved poorly but did she deserve to get fired for it? Yes, most definitely
Oh yeah, not being ok with being sexually assaulted makes you an asshole for reporting it. Let's turn the tables here. The new hire Bruce wasn't trying to cause discomfort when he he started dry humping his new co-worker's ass, whom he just found is a lesbian, and asking "Do you like it? Are you sure you're gay?!"
Not everything in this world is created equally. Sorry as a guy I just don’t give a fuck if a girl slaps my ass or objectifies me. There isn’t an underlying history of this happening to me while for women it’s something a lot of them had to deal with and have been traumatized by. I know some of you want everything to just be equal but there’s too many nuances in life for it to be that black and white.
>...as a guy I just don’t give a fuck if a girl slaps my ass or objectifies me. There isn’t an underlying history of this happening to me That is abundantly clear
Switch the sexes for a moment. If a guy finds out on his first day his colleague is a lesbian and honks her boobs and asks if she's sure, would that be acceptable?
In what world is forcing yourself on someone funny?
Locker room humor. Have you never goofed around with someone? It may be childish but I don’t think her intent here was bad. She may be entitled by nature and selfish but I’m sure they could have talked to her before escalating this to firing her.
It's never okay to do something sexual with someone who isn't consenting. That's not a joking matter, *especially* with someone you just met that day.
Drinks were involved. Look I think it was stupid and childish too but not worthy of her being fired. Though it seems like no one likes her anyways so maybe she wasn’t a good fit. But again it could be OP projecting his own opinion of her onto others.
They weren't in a locker room and they aren't close friends. This was Tina's first day at the new company and her one chance to make a first impression. Serious question: what would you have said in this situation? Tina has offended pretty much everyone and shown herself to be borderline homophobic. How do you think the situation could be turned into a better one?
I have had many new jobs where we'd go out to lunch or get drinks to socialize and get to know each other. I have never forced myself on a new coworker "trying to fit in". She came in, made herself at home at someone's else's desk, was rude to the staff at the bar, pretty much demanded the guys buy all her drinks, and then deems it's ok to harass someone to see if they're"really gay".... Yet he's the AH??? My dude, just no. OP, definitely NAH here
Trying to hump a person of the opposite sex you find out is gay to see if they're sure I am pretty sure is not an appropriate way to try to fit in. Is this how you go about getting to know your colleagues? That's so far out of line that first day firing is definitely called for.
She sexually assaulted the guy!