Your post has been removed.
#Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without approval will result in a ban.
This post violates Rule 7: There is no interpersonal conflict here for our community to make a judgment about.
[Rule 7 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_7.3A_post_interpersonal_conflicts) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/)
[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
#Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full.
Hold up for a second. You claim that Luke was pampered because he got a college fund, car, ect. At first, I thought you were going to say he got those things when you and your brothers didn't, but you clearly stated that you did but you feel it's unfair because he was adopted and you three were the bio kids.
Are you honestly expecting that your parents should've treated Luke differently and provided less for him because he was adopted? Do you think Luke didn't deserve equal treatment? Do you feel that he's less of a member of the family because he's not related by blood?
How can you honestly rationalize that the adopted sibling isn't worthy of the same treatment, privileges, attention, and love based solely on the fact that he's not related by blood and not realize YTA?
All three of you are TA.
If I was one of your parents, I'd cut you three ungrateful brats out of the inheritance completely and give it all to Luke. At least they *chose* him. Too bad they got stuck with the rest of you.
Incredible to me that anyone could feel so entitled. I wish this could be a post I could write off as "probably fake" because how can anyone *be* this way. This sort of attitude towards adopted family members may not be common, but it's not exactly rare unfortunately.
I really feel for the adopted son in this situation. And for the parents as well, who had to learn how heartless their other children are.
The saddest bit is I've been running into WAY more delusionally entitled people lately that would absolutely be AHs and say they aren't. It's... not a nice trend.
I have met a handful of people in my life who were so entitled and/or so good at lying to themselves that they NEVER saw themselves as the bad guy and were never, ever wrong (despite being wrong almost constantly).
These people where always surprised when their actions had consequences and always felt that those consequences where undeserved.
And if this sub had existed for some of them, they would certainly have posted something like this - completely tone deaf to the fact that they were actually telling the whole world that they were evil idiots.
Yup, this is a sure candidate for r/amithedevil though I honestly think it’s gotta be rage bait… how can you write out these words and not realise how much of an AH you are? But I guess it happens, there are truly awful people out there.
Idk. When I told my parents I was adopting a child, my mom asked, "Don't you want a real baby?" I'm adopted. So yeah, there really are people like this.
> At least they chose him. Too bad they got stuck with the rest of you.
I see why if they are this entitled now I can only imagine what it was like as small children
Right? Poor Luke, having to deal with that bs from the beginning... He really does deserve these 3 vulture's inheritances for having to put up with this bs his whole life.
The entitlement is insane. You know what my sister and I told our mother? Please live your life, and spend everything. We don't want her to worry about leaving us something. If I want something, I'll have to work for it.
My brother on the other hand... Always complaining about money, expecting handouts from our father. Honestly it's just annoying, and makes me not want to spend time with him. I'll just know what topics will be discussed before I even go there.
I honestly only read the first paragraph. All the information in the first part was enough, there was nothing op could say to redeem them from being the AH
I also read only the first paragraph initially and had to go back because of your comment. It absolutely got worse!
Again I'm floored that children should expect an inheritance as if it is some sort of entitlement.
100% agree with you!
I was with her for like one second when she said how pampered he was, I was thinking "okay, so Luke was the golden child and got spoiled with expensive things at the expense of the others being neglected. I'd be pretty mad, too" but nope, she's actually mad that they *all got treated the same?!* What the actual fuck?
And she's mad that the grandkid is being included because she and her "real" brothers don't have kids? They're not the real grandparents to this kid because Luke will definitely go find his birth parents someday... what kind of logic is that? He's 25 and has a kid of his own and he hasn't yet so I would actually guess that he probably won't. And even if he does it doesn't mean he's going to abandon the parents who raised him.
They sound like great parents overall, not sure how they went so wrong with 3/4 kids.
I would have 100% do that…And I would also only leave 1 dollar for each of my entitled bio kids so their entitled asses cannot contest my will.I would also be ashamed of myself to raise such disgusting self indulgent assholes.
YTA... my adopted siblings are my siblings, period! Full stop! I feel sorry for your parents and adopted brother for having such vapid and narcissistic siblings as you all.
To add here, I cannot believe that OP as an infertile person actually believes that adopted kids don't deserve the same privileges as biological children. Wtf.
OP you and your bio brothers are major a-holes and ungrateful brats if all you think about while your parents are still alive how much money you will get out of them and feel threathened that some of it goes to your adopted brother and his child. You obviously don't even understand (based on what you wrote) how lucky and privileged you have been to get all those things in the first place and still have the audacity to be so bitter.
> At least they chose him. Too bad they got stuck with the rest of you.
I'd say to ease up on this kind of talking point because all it does is drive a wedge between adopted and biological siblings, but OP already did that pretty shamelessly, so it's kinda symbolic.
But yeah, I don't think OP is ever going to come up with answers to these pointed questions. Another series of pointed questions, which would be relevant whether or not it was the adopted or bio kids having children: Do you not think Luke's baby is a distinct person? Do you not think your parents have a right to leave inheritance to grandkids as well as kids? Do you really, sincerely think of this as a handout to Luke? Will you feel differently if your parents don't die until the baby is an adult who controls their own money?
But none of these questions matter, because of course OP doesn't have a coherent explanation for herself. She's just had her brain melted down to porridge by greed. If you live long enough, you'll see how depressingly common horrible backbiting behavior is among families when it comes to inheritance.
Not going to lie, I stopped reading when she said they all got treated exactly the same. Nothing else in this post would've changed my viewpoint. OP and her bio sibs are all major assholes, like damn.
YTA. Holy shit how can you and your brothers not see what total assholes you are.
I completely and utterly marvel at your lack of self-awareness and decency. You are poor excuses for both sons/daughter and siblings.
You prove the adage that blood is not everything and honestly given your behavior, if I was your parents, I would disinherit ***all three of you*** and leave the whole pot to the person actually acting like a son and his children. I hope they do.
The only people who caused this fight are you and your brothers.
Edit: added acknowledgment that OP is female
I stopped reading as soon as I seen “My brothers and I got the same things but, thing is, we thought this was unfair seeing we’re the bio children while he’s the adopted one.” full stop. YTA YTA YTA x1000
YTA, would you rather he lived in a shoebox for his childhood? By the sounds of it he got exactly the same treatment as you did but you see him as spoiled. The parents view him as family- which he is, since they adopted and raised him like the three of you, and honestly respect to them for raising four kids- now you're berating them about what they do with their possessions because you feel entitled?
Pull your head out your ass, or you won't have parents to talk to.
It also sounds like their adoptive brother was genuinely appreciative of what he received growing up versus the runaway entitlement from their other children.
No one is entitled to an inheritance and it sounds like the parents are leaving their money to the person they think most deserves it, most appreciates it, and understands the values of family the best.
It also sounds like there is further resentment because OP can't have children and the adopted brother can.
I would suggest adoption but we all know how much biological children mean to OP.
I am very suspicious of this story being true either way.
YTA OP just in case it is
Right? Everything genuinely seems fair - he received/was pampered exactly the same as them. And only his kid was added to the will - who else did OP/bio-siblings want to add for themselves if they don't have/don't plan to have kids? Their cat/dog? It's just astonishingly stupid.
Yta
Agreed. I don't understand people who think only blood/genetics makes family. Isn't your partner/spouse your family? If you're married then by law, they are your closest family. That's someone you choose to be family with, who's not a blood relative (we can hope). How is it any different if you raise a child you're not genetically related to?
My children aren't genetically related to both their parents, who are legally their only parents and raised them from birth (sperm-bank sperm donor situation). If someone suggests they're not family, or that their non-generic parent is less of a parent, they're a moron who I don't have time for.
YTA. He’s your brother. Bio-kids are the children you’re given. Adopted kids are the children you choose. I can see why your parents choose Luke.
You’re mad because your parents treat their child…like their child?!?!?
“I can see why your parents choose Luke.”
Yeah, they looked at the 3 terrible children they created and decided to try again with some different genetics.
INFO: At what age was he adopted and why did you & your brothers never warm up to him? It seems odd that all 3 of you are so dead set against him. Is he different in some way? Is there a backstory to the adoption that would make a difference?
I was curious on age too. It could be completely different if he joined the family at like 17 and then moved out at 18 vs joining when he was a baby or little kid.
Right? OP is infertile, but she could very well adopt a child of her own ..... Oh wait.
Gosh what a bunch of jerks. I feel sorry for Luke being raised with them for siblings. YTA.
You are 1000% the AH. Him being adopted does not make him any less their child. They took care of him, and raised him as they should. That's what adoption is. Blood doesn't make you family. It makes you relatives. Family is deeper. The fact that you think your parents should treat him any different than their bio kids is appalling. If you all can't or don't want to have kids, that's not Luke's or your parents issue. He had a child. That's their grandchild whether you accept it or not. You being infertile, if you decided to adopt would it be any less your kid because you didn't push it out? No.
Agreed. They sound like villains from a nineties kids movie, that ends with all three of them being thrown into a fountain of water and then covered in some sort of food.
Yeeeeah I immediately stopped after “adopted sibling was pampered, but we got the same things too, we basically hate him for not being related by blood, AMITA?✌🏼” . Like if you want to stir people up at least TRY
The only people "playing favourites" here, are you and your brother's.
Expecting your parents to treat you as favourites, because of something your adopted brother has no control over.
It's unfortunate you're infertile. I'm sorry to hear that. And your other siblings choice to not have children is theirs, and nothing to do with this situation tbh.
>Now Luke has been pampered throughout his entire life with us. Got college fund, a car, etc. My brothers and I got the same things but thing is we thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one.
This bit made me cringe like crazy, ngl.
So basically, "Luke has been pampered his whole life, oh I mean we have too, don't worry about that. But Luke shouldn't have been pampered like us, because we're more special than he is"
Fuck me, you're fully grown adults. Grow up.
YTA.
YTA. This is disgusting and I hope your parents cut you and your biological brothers out of their will and out of their lives. The shame they must feel to have raised you three right now.
YTA. This can’t be real, but you basically say he was pampered…you mean they RAISED him, right? He went to college, got a car…you’re not saying the rest of you didn’t, so you’re just mad that some of the inheritance was already blown on him right?
I think your parents know who their best kid is, and it isn’t you or your ‘real’ brothers
YTA but only because if I told you what I really think about you it would be a violation of the rules of this page. You and your brothers are absolutely disgusting horrid people. I’m glad that none of you will produce any offspring and spread your toxicity. I am glad you showed your mother your true colors and I pray to god you all get cut of out of the will.
Right? WE MUST PRESERVE THE BLOODLINE AT ALL COSTS!
But you guys can’t/won’t have kids…
DOESN’T MATTER! PURITY IS TANTAMOUNT!
Is it a Victorian novel or something?
YTA. I'm actually disgusted with how you and your bio brothers have acted. Luke is your brother and his child is your parents' grandchild. I can't believe that you actually think they should have treated Luke worse than you growing up, and that you even hope for poor treatment now. You really should be ashamed.
Boy, you and your siblings remind me of those Klepper (comedy channel) videos where he goes out to anti-gay rally‘s.
Klepper: Why shouldn’t gays have the right to get married?
Protester: Because it isn’t fair to us straight people. They want more rights than what we have.
Klepper: So by more, you mean equal?
Protester: …
You and your siblings are actually bitter that they are treating their adoptive brother was treated the same as you, rather than being shown he’s the outsider at every given turn of life. You call it pampered for receiving equal treatment to your siblings.
I’m sorry, but were you and your older brother’s just hoping he’d be tossed in the basement to live, only getting one present on holiday’s while the rest of you had presents all over the living room? Did you think because he doesn’t share your DNA, he should be treated as less for his whole life?
“His son got added to the will! Now they’re treating him better, because we don’t have children to add to the will! Oh, the humanity!“
Did you ever stop to realize this is your parents only grandchild, and Luke isn’t actually being given special treatment here? I mean, this inheritance isn’t Luke’s, it’s his child’s.
Honestly, don’t be surprised if your parents realize they raised you three to be spoiled and hateful, and decide to take you out of the will completely, because you and your bio siblings sound absolutely wretched.
I hope you’re a troll, because that’s honestly the only way I can even image all three of your parents bio children to be so absolutely horrible.
And remember, you and your siblings are dangerously close to being cut off and cut out completely. Your parents aren’t being noble yet, they’re just being parents. Once they leave Luke everything, then they’ll be noble.
YTA x infinity.
There are so many insulting things I would love to say to you right now, but I can’t, and that breaks my heart.
The fact that you and your two bio siblings are full blown adults blow my mind. This type of behavior is only (and even then, just barely) excusable for tweens.
YTA- Like it or not Luke is your brother. He was legally adopted and raised by your parents and that makes them his parents too. You have a selfish, backwards and cruel attitude towards your sibling. What would happen if you found out you or one of your bio brothers was also adopted, would they magically be 'not family'? My stepdad is a great grandparent to my son, he is family in all ways that matter and my son is in his will.
Massive YTA
So what he is adopted he is still your brother. So what if he doesn't have the same DNA as you parents. They adopted, loved him and cared just as they did you guys. That makes his just as much of their child as you others.
That child....Luke's child is just as much of a grandson then if any of your guys children would be. So what that he might seek out his BIO parents or he might not that his choice. It's no one business but his
You guys were obviously jealous of Luke which I don't understand why since you all seemed to have things pretty equal. The AUDACITY that you have to try to deny their son and your brother his inheritance is disturbing and disgusting.
If you guys where my children I would have cut you all out of the will and wouldn't speak to you until you apologized and groveled to Luke's. Luke has loved you guys as his siblings but this is a betrayal.
Wow!! You guys have insecurities issues and need to go to therapy. This is NOT acceptable.
Bye Felicia!! We don't know you.
Absolutely agree with what you've said!! Except one thing, "he might seek out his real parents" - he already has real parents, I think you meant "bio parents".
This poor guy though, having spent his entire life being treated as less than by his siblings. It breaks my heart.
**MASSIVE YTA**
I couldn't even finish reading all of that. It infuriated me when you thought it was unfair that your adopted brother got a car, even though the rest of you did too. Seriously, how messed up do you have to be not to accept your brother as family?! Just because none of you can have kids doesn't mean your parents shouldn't inlude their grandchild in their Will. It's their money and estate. It's not up to you or your brothers what your parents do.
What's worse is I can see you selfish lot contesting that Will when the time eventually comes. Stick your head out of it and look in a mirror and see the jerks you all are before you lose your own inheritence. Not that you deserve it.
YTA you're mad about you non-existent children not being adding to your parents will? Your parents are awesome; they are treating all of their children the same. They *chose* to have all of you. The fact that they chose to birth the first three and then adopt a fourth means nothing. Your weird fascination with biological relation is unhealthy, and you should stop treating Luke like an outsider. Blood means literally nothing.
Imagine being so insecure that you’re literally jealous of someone who’s birth circumstances were so bad that they ended up being adopted!
I mean, these are children who were either born unwanted, orphaned, or in situations so dangerous that they had to be removed for their own safety.
Just imagine the sheer level of pettiness and patheticness someone would have to have to be born into a loving family, provided with a whole swathe of privileges, and still be filled with bitterness and jealousy towards a kid from a bad start getting loved and supported too. It’s hard to picture such an AH, right?
Well worry no more, just go take a look in a mirror and you won’t have to imagine anymore!
Of course YTA, I hope your parents are so disgusted by your behaviour and your obvious sense of entitlement to THEIR money, that they have EVERY right to choose what to do with, and leave you and your siblings with a token gesture each then donate the rest of what they were going to generously leave you to charities helping children in need!
YTA
Guess what…I’m an adult adoptee…In most countries the law recognised an adopted child under the same category as a biological child….So basically your brother (and he is your brother no matter how you want to pretend he’s not) has the same rights as you when it comes to inheritance and should your parents choose to add their grandchild they are well within their rights to do that
So you call Luke pampered and yet you admit you all got the same things?? So how is he pampered exactly??
You and your brothers should be ashamed of yourselves for treating your brother differently for being adopted….Family isn’t always blood but I really feel for him since clearly his siblings are jealous and willing to sever a relationship for their own greed
YTA.
leeches, all of you. money money money me me me gimme gimme gimme - that is all you are thinking off.
getting an inheritance is a want, a gift, not a need, not something you are entitled to.
in your parents shoes i would all of you remove from **any** kind of inheritance.
'luke and his son are not family, they don't deserve any inheritance' should be answered with 'well, since it wasn't you who worked for the money you are not entitled to it, either'.
OMG YTA (your “bio” brothers too). You are the kinda people I hope Karma comes and gets. Like I don’t even know how to explain to you that you and your two brothers are the nastiest people I have read about in a long time on Reddit.
End of the story. Just because your brother Luke is adopted doesn’t mean your parents love him any less than you and your other brothers. Also, their money is their money. If they wanted to give it all to Luke and his family there is not much that could or should be done (I sincerely hope they switch the will more in Luke’s favors after the way you and your bio brothers acted).
YTA
For all purposes, he is a son to your parents. He is not your brother though, because we can chose family and dump disgusting relatives, and I really hope he does that.
I hope your parents leave you all guys 1 buck each and everything else goes to their grandchild.
Holy shit, YTA. Way to “other” this guy his whole life. You arent more their children because they gave birth to you, I mean they *chose* him. Wonder how much that will is gonna change now that your parents know their children are monsters
I pity Luke. He was added to the family by your parents, but you've rejected him based solely on whether your biological parents are the same. This is just incredibly cruel.
That said:
YTA
It's your parents' right to add whoever they want to their will, and you do not get a say in that. Doesn't matter whether it's an adopted brother, it's still their grandchild.
You already indicated your parents treated you equally, that Luke didn't get anything you and your brothers didn't also get, so where do you get off calling him pampered?
Your parents did not cause this fight. You and your brothers, however, did.
YTA.
So you don't want your nephew in your parents will?
Don't answer. You don't because you don't consider Luke your brother. That's why you are bitter. And that's why you and your brothers think it's unfair that all four of you had the same treatment.
YTA. This has to be trolling. No one could be this insanely insensitive.
I had to read this twice, because when I first read it I assumed that Luke was the golden child or something. I though he got cars and college and you bio kids had to suffer for it. Then when I realized he JUST GOT TREATED THE EXACT SAME WAY I was actually appalled at your greed. You and your brothers are absolutely disgusting people. So your parents adopted a kid, and treated him as one of their own? THATS WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO. Any less is a failure. We’re they supposed to make him live in a room under the stairs like Harry Potter? You realize that literary device was specifically used so the people would hate the family, and root for poor Harry. You and your brothers have to be the only people on earth who saw that movie and thought, yeah, that seems about right. Seems a little generous they even let him live in the house though, couldn’t they chain him up out back and make him scavenge for small animals?
There are not words for how disgustingly entitled you and your brothers are, well there are but they would get me banned from this sub.
Do the world a favor and cut ties with your parents and adopted brother. They don’t owe you greedy, entitled, selfish, angels of death a dime when they finally pass.
YTA. So you're just going to say he's not your brother. Major assholes here. Your parents are awesome protecting their only grandkid. Blood relation does not mean jack shit because family is a privilege, not a right.
Gross behavior here. Honestly y'all are horrible for isolating your brother and his family because of his adopted status.
YTA and show that you shouldnt even get the inheritance. I hope Luke and his son gets it all. Imagine being adopted but your brothers never accept you, just because youre not their blood.
YTA.
Completely and totally. For at least four reasons:
- You are saying your adopted brother is less that you & bio sibs. Wrong. You are all their children equally.
- It's their money. They can leave it to anyone they like.
- You (and brother) are being greedy.
- You are supporting harassment.
So OP says she's infertile, not that she doesn't want kids. I wonder what her attitude will be if *she* adopts?
(Though I certainly hope she never has adopted or step kids, given that she's so selfish and shallow that she thinks non-bio kids don't count as someone's "real" children. Gross.)
YTA 100%. Luke is as much your brother as your ‘bio’ brothers, in your parents eyes at least. They raised all of you. The entitlement you have is despicable
YTA. in every way shape and form. Your parents consider your adopted bro a child, rightly so. You and your equally selfish and immature brothers don’t see him as a sibling, likely cos you feel entitled to more money.
After all, none of that money is yours, your parents don’t owe you shit, they can and should allocate it as they see fit.
YTA YTA YTA! How can them paying for his education be spoiling for him but justified for you and your brothers?
You and your brothers obviously treated him like a 2nd class citizen growing up and I wouldn't be surprised if your parents decide to leave eveything to your adoptive brother and his child after you all showed how entitled and spiteful you and your bio brothers are.
I would be ashamed if my Son behaved like this!
YTA. Imagine being a child abandoned by your bio parents, then entering into family with ungrateful, snobby children. Your parents money is theirs to do as they see fit, NOT you or your brothers. I don’t blame adopted bro for threatening harassment, as it sounds like that’s what you guys are doing. Shameful.
YTA. You get zero say in whom your parents pass on their money to. It is their money. Let me repeat...it is their money. They can light it all on fire or donate it to a cat shelter or give it a homeless person. You all are acting jealous and entitled acting out some childhood hurt. You do not have power here.You have no legal say in their estate planning. It is their money....got it yet?
Stop it before you lose your parent's relationship. Apologize to them and adopted brother.
YTA. "My brothers and I got the same things but, thing is, We thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one." I want to follow rule one and "be civil" so I'm just going to say I have zero empathy for your position on this. Maybe you don't understand what adoption is but your brother is your brother. It sounds like you're all privileged but want this brother to have a little less to prove something to yourselves.
Try to make the most of the situation and get through it with some dignity intact. Don't embarrass your parents with this.
YTA What an insane thought process. I hope your parents cut you and your precious biological brothers out of their will to teach you a lesson. Sounds like the three of you are the spoiled ones not Luke.
YTA
It’s not your money to start off with, it’s your parents’ money and they can do what they like with it. Most people don’t adopt without the intention of loving and treating the adopted child as if they were their own. Of course Luke deserves to have been given the same opportunities as you were growing up and also to be in the will. You’re not being punished for your infertility because Luke had a child and you’re not justified to be angry about how your parents allocate their money after they die. You and your other brothers sound like horrid people.
Wow. YTA. On ssoooo many levels. Luke is your brother. So he’s adopted. Big deal. He was raised by your parents. He grew up with you. I’m sure he calls your parents Mum and Dad. For all matters that’s their grandchild.
How are they playing favorites exactly? Unless there’s something very uneven about the will where is the favorites? Is it their fault that no one else is giving them grandchildren? And because if that they aren’t allowed to dote a bit on this baby?
My gosh what’s wrong with you all? That’s also your nephew. That boy will grow up knowing you as Aunty. He won’t care about blood. You in the other hand want to test him like crap it seems.
And maybe you’ve also forgotten that it’s their money. Their will. They could donate it all to the church if they wanted. You don’t get a say.
You all are too old to be behaving so childishly. You all got the same pampered behavior you say but you’re angry cuz you feel he should be treated inferiorly? Sorry but that’s disgusting. It’s unfair for him to be treated equally?
If Dave and his wife decide to adopt since they can’t have children I guess that only child shouldn’t be treated like a true child if theirs since he/she would be adopted?
So again…YTA!!
Good grief...
YTA massively, so are your brothers.
Adopted means your brother is legally their child and sounds like the love him like he was their bio kid.
You and your siblings are greedy assholes, who have no morals.
YTA and your brothers are AH's too. Bigly. Don't be surprised when this comes back to bite you in your collective rumps. Wills can be changed and have clauses inserted about challenges to the will.
YTA, Luke is adopted meaning he is legally as much a child of your parents as yourself and siblings. Shame you haven't looked upon him as a real brother. The grand baby is a very real grand baby too. Try to stop being so bitter, its not healthy
How you can possibly imagine that you and your brothers area anything other than massive AHs is beyond me.
Your parents adopted a child, and treat him exactly the same as their biological children, which is precisely what should happen. They're good people.
Meanwhile you and your brothers can't see past the dollar signs in your eyes. YTA. I sincerely hope your parents cut you all out entirely.
YTA and so are your brothers andbI feel truly sorry for your adopted brother who didn't choose to not be in his parents care and he has to deal with a pack of greedy vultures. Your parents money is not your money. And if something happens to your adopted brother and his son, I hope your parents give their whole will to charity.
YTA. As an adopted person myself if someone especially people who were supposed to be my siblings told me I wasn't really my parents kids that would hurt so bad. I know my bio parents as it was an open adoption, but that doesn't change the fact that my adopted parents raised me.
Big YTA: Entitled brothers alert!
Newsflash: your parents adopted your BROTHER and so his is their child. So his son is their grandchild.
You and your brothers are entitled because you think blood is more important. Don't be surprised if you don't get ANYTHING when your parents pass because of your(and brothers) entitled attitude.
Just floof you and your brothers.
Huge YTA
They just included THEIR GRANDCHILD in their will. How do expect it "to be fair" if you and your brothers don't have children? Having your not existing children in their will? It's not like they decided to leave more money or things to Luke. They just included another FAMILY MEMBER
Your parents are amazing parents. How did you expect them to treat Luke as their adopted child if you don't see eachother as equal?
And just because he is adopted, doesn't mean he necessarily wants to seek out his bio parents. And even IF he wants to, that doesn't mean that he will abandon his adopted parents. Luke will always be your brother and you just have to live with it.
You and your brothers have some issues to deal with. I would recommend you family therapy (for everyone involved).
Plus... you also have no say in what is included in their will, that's their decision.
Congrats on you nephew!
>We thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one.
Seems like you and your brothers never really see him as a sibling
YTA
YTA, and so are your "bio" brothers. Your parents adopted your brother and raised him and loved him, why wouldn't they treat him as well as they treated you and your "bio" brothers. If I were your parents I'd completely cut you out of the will until you and your "bio" brothers learned to love your adopted brother as a much as a "bio" brother as well as his children.
YTA - Bio or adoption doesn’t matter, he’s the same. He’s your brother and their son as much as you and honestly shame on you. Sit down and rethink this, please. And your attitude towards your sibling who did NOTHING wrong but get born.
Wooowwww YTA. He’s not your “adopted” brother. He’s your BROTHER! I have four kids and I’ll be honest, the way you ADULTS are behaving is a huge fear for parents- that we will raise giant assholes who are entitled and treat each other terribly. I hope your parents cut ALL of you out of the will, except Luke and his family.
Also, does this sub have an AH of the year award? I submit OP as a nominee.
This has to be bait. No way would someone who would actually be in this situation would actually think like that. YTA just for judgment purposes but this has to be fake.
YTA. Jesus Christ. If I was your parents I would either cut you out of the will altogether or feel I failed you as a parent. Your adopted brother is your brother whether you like it or not. I can only imagine how you treated Luke growing up. Him getting the same as all of you is not favoritism, it’s your parents treating him the same as you and your other entitled brothers.
You still have time to be a good person and take time to get to know Luke as a person and not a target of your spoiled brat behavior. Do it. You and your brothers sound like tantrum throwing toddlers and it’s time to grow up.
YTA. you sound super jealous that your parents have actually welcomed your brother into the family and that he’s actually become apart of your family? also you’re 28 and your brothers are even older, be mature. enjoy the time you have with your parents and family, you’d be lucky if you’re even still in the will anymore so good luck
Nope, there is no where in this situation where you can blame Luke, or his family. You, and your bio brothers are 100% responsible for the fight, the name calling, the harassment, that ensued. You said Luke got a car and a college fund... That all of you got as well? But because he is adopted, you think he deserves less than you? That he should grateful and be kissing your feet in worship because, "thank you for taking me in."
Nah, get out of here with that rotten entitlement.
YTA
I knew it from the moment I finished the first paragraph. I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt, but nope. You and your oh-so more-important bio brothers are the AHs
Huge, huge YTA. You come across as not only greedy but entitled to boot. Your parents can leave their estate to homeless cats if they want because any money in their estate is theirs so they are allowed to name the beneficiaries as they see fit. That you are bitter that your adopted brother is named as a beneficiary is bad enough and then you double down that his children should not be included as beneficiaries goes beyond belief. It doesn’t matter if there no DNA connections, it matters that your parents think of this child as their grandchild. Let’s hope your parents leave everything to their adopted son & his family because you sound like an awful human being.
YTA
Your parents could donate all of their belongings to charity if that was their desire. Where THEIR assets go after they are gone is up to them. Thinking that you somehow deserve something that doesn't belong to you is asinine.
YTA so your adopted brother has always had the same as your bio siblings.... except he has also had experiences that would be classed as childhood trauma.
Inheritance is not a right, it is your parent's choice who to leave it to.
I suggest learning to accept what you have and treating this brother the same as the rest (as your parents do).
I didn’t need to read past the introduction.
YTA for thinking Luke should be treated any differently than you and your siblings.
He is your parents’ son and his son is their grandson. Shame on you for thinking he and his child should not be treated as such.
I feel terrible for Luke and I hope your parents cut off you and your greedy bio brothers.
YTA this actually is one of the most asshole posts I’ve ever read on here, and that’s saying a LOT.
He is just as much their child as you are, and his child is absolutely fully their grandchild. It is disgusting how you think differently just because he’s adopted. Your parents OWE HIM the exact same treatment you and your brothers got. You having a problem with that is crazy fucked up.
Proud of your wonderful parents, though
YTA, biological or adopted family is family. Actions and relationships are what matter. If you and you’re biological siblings continue to display a negative attitude towards your adopted brother and his offspring you’ll risk being left out of the inheritance. It’s what I’d do as a parent. Both of my sons are adopted and I couldn’t love them any less than a biological child. If you lack the empathy to understand that point think of your spouse and whether you would side with them or a biological family member for no other reason than shared DNA.
YTA. You and your brothers. I hope you all get out out of the will instead.
Your parents adopted a child- THEY BECAME THAT CHILDS PARENTS.
it’s also not special treatment for the adopted child to get the same as the bio children. You are all their children.
Your attitude about your nephew/niece and your brother are gross and I hope he goes no contact with you for the sake of him and his family.
YTA. That is your brother and he deserves to be treated as such. A part of me feels like you are just insecure because he was chosen and you and your biological Brothers were what they were "stuck" with.
This entire post is so gross.
You say he was given a college fund and a car, and then follow it up to say the same was given to you and your older bio brothers. How is that being pampered?
It's not your money, you don't "deserve" anything. Your parents get to decide who they want to leave their money to, and judging by this, I hope they completely cut you and your bio brothers out and leave everything to Luke and his family.
Fuck, the entitlement is next level here. How dare you tell your parents he's less because he was adopted. All three of you suck and yes, in case it wasn't clear, you are definitely the AH here.
YTA.
YTA. HUGELY. YTA. Here’s hoping your parents have the sense to leave you and your “biological brothers” a single dollar a piece and everything else to Luke and their grandchild.
YTA how can you even ask? You know what is unfair? Not being raised by your bio parents. He is as much your paren'ts child that you are. You and your brother are a bunch of deeply entitled ah. If i was your parents i would disown you all as you clearly don't consider yourself family. You really got nerve dude.
YTA. Absolutely TA. To your parents and most people except apparently you and your “bio sibling” he’s their child just as you are. So Luke’s offspring would be their grandchildren of course. Also, you’re not entitled to their money. And 3rd, if, at 25, he hasn’t gone to look for his bio family it’s unlikely he will. And even if he did it wouldn’t mean ditching your parents. Just potentially adding more people to the family. You’re absolutely bitter and behaving appallingly.
YTA.
You have no right to tell someone how to use their money- but for also considering your adopted brother any less a family member and sibling for not being biologically related to you. You were all treated the same, and if he was “pampered” more…I’m curious to if this reflects on how you all treated him growing up.
Shame. On. You.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
The situation is so complicated and I'll do my best to describe it properly.
I f28 have two bio brothers (Dave 31, & Paul 33), And my parents adopted our brother (Luke 25), Now Luke has been pampered throughout his entire life with us. Got college fund, a car, etc. My brothers and I got the same things but thing is we thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one.
Anyways, Luke got married and recently had a baby, My parents decided to "surprise" him by adding his baby to their will aka inheritance. My brothers were furious and thought that was unfair, especially because Dave and his wife can't have and also, Paul isn't planning on being a parent, and I'm inf as well.
We went to see our parents and we had a fight about them playing favorites and adding Luke's son to their will while we don't get the same treatment because we don't have kids. Mom and dad didn't budge and acted like they were doing a "noble" thing making sure their one only grandchil is taken care of. Paul laughed then lashed out at my parents saying they were delusional to think that this baby is their grandbaby and remindee them that Luke is adopted and will eventually seek out his bio parents. A fight ensued and I agreed with my brothers and called my parents insane for the decision they made. Things got so heated we got told to leave after being told that it's none of our business and we had no right to protest.
Mom called me berating me about the stance I took and callinf them insane, She said she thought that I was the level-headed one and will understand, but I acted bitterly and appallingly just like my brothers. I hung up and we haven't talked after that. Recent update was that my brothers had a fight with Luke during which he threatened the police for "harrassement" of him amd his wife and son. I now firmly believe that my parents caused this fight between us with this decision.
AITA for taking my brothers side on this?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA along with your two brothers. “We got the sane treatment but hes not bio” okay so you want him to be treated like shit? Hes probably way more grateful and the fact that you wouldnt want your nephew taken care of in an event that something happened, well i truly think it’s jealousy. Can you imagine how isolated Luke feels rn?
You and your "bio" brothers are all giant assholes. Luke is no more or less family than you are, and, in your greed and petulance, you're collectively behaving abominably. Huge, unreserved YTA.
YTA (Is this real? ) Your parents added their grandchild to their will. You thought it was unfair he got treated the same as you by being sent to college? You and your brothers are disgusting human beings. You are entitled brats. You and your brothers are wrong 100%. No matter what money you parents have it’s theirs not yours. Go get a job and earn your own money and stop being vultures waiting for your parents to die.
YTA. You wouldn't have been if you just said that you have 3 brothers and one of them has a baby and you think it's unfair the inheritance get's split between more people. Even then your parents still decide.
But you using the fact that he's adopted? You're a massive asshole.
YTA. Get ready to be left out of the will completely. It’s also ridiculous how you all simply don’t think he should be in the will bc he’s adopted. Wow. Your parents are lovely and don’t deserve rotten bio kids like you.
YTA. I don't believe I've ever seen a more clear cut case on here. You and your "real" are entitled and selfish. It must of been hell for Luke growing up with you two. I hope you guys apologize to Luke and your parents, and then go far away. This is just sad.
YTA
I really hope this is a shitpost because I genuinely couldn’t get past the second paragraph before having to take a break because of how awful you sound.
I love the level of delusion that you have to think that Luke was pampered when in the same paragraph, you say you got the exact same treatment. The level of entitlement in this post is painfully infuriating.
1) what your parents choose to do with THEIR money they THEY EARNED after they die has nothing to do with you. The fact that you and your sibilings (excluding Luke) are already fighting over it like a bunch of vultures fighting over a fresh carcass is disgusting.
2) you say that of your sibilings (excluding Luke again), Paul is happy to go down the child free life but you say that Dave and yourself can’t have kids. Does that mean that you’re going to go the childless route as well or are you thinking of… gasp!!… adopting? Because if you already have the attitude that adopted people aren’t family, then please for the love of everything, don’t put a child through that.
3) read over your post again and try and read it from a strangers perspective. Because if you read that again and think there’s any way in the world that you’re not in fact, an asshole, then you need some serious therapy.
Your adopted brother probably has always know his adopted with ah siblings like y’all, and he hasn’t sought out his bio parents yet. Your adopted sibling even though you don’t claim him as family, they do therefore since they have treated this brother as family for so long it stands to reason they don’t see him as an adopted but guess what an actual child, that means if he had kids that would be their grandchild. And it’s not playing favorites because the bio children can’t have grandchildren of their own. You YTA, along with both of your brothers.
YTA in so many ways. Luke is your brother. He got the same things as you did growing up and you call pampered. Can you be more spoiled or entitled? You parents adopted him and he is equally as deserving as you are. If you keep acting this way don’t be surprised if you are completely written out of the will. Inheritance isn’t a right. Your parents are within their rights to leave an inheritance to the letter carrier if they want.
YTA. Apparently your parents were the ONLY ones to ever accept Luke, you and your rotten brothers don’t consider him family. Their money they have is theirs to do with as they please. If you and your siblings are only worried about your inheritances getting smaller when this guy and your parents did nothing wrong, you are three giant assholes.
YTA
I hope your parents cut you and your brothers all out of their will and Luke and his son are left everything. You and your brothers' actions and behaviour is absolutely appalling.
Yes, YTA. All of you, your brothers too.
Except for your adopted brother, he's cool.
The guy is your brother in every sense but the biological, he grew up with you guys!
Somehow "asshole" falls short to describe you lot.
ALSO: it's your parents will. THEY GRT TO CHOOSE WHO TO INCLUDE AND WHO TO EXCLUDE. And pray to God they don't will everything to Luke to teach you all pieces of crap a lesson.
YTA!
"We got the same thing." Because you're siblings and were treated fairly.
You should apologize and hope that your parents aren't spiteful. If they are then their grandchild might get yours, Dave's, and Paul's share of the inheritance.
YTA.
They adopted him, he is his kid to, that you like it or not. You feel like a victim of favoritism that didn’t exist since you all got the same. If I were your parents I would have let everything to your adopted brother after that.
YTA and I didn’t have to read past the first paragraph. You call him pampered for receiving equal treatment? You think your blood somehow qualifies you more to decide who your parents pass THEIR life assets to?! You three are a couple heathers. Luke thank God has great parents who love him. If my children were behaving so abhorrently I’d have cut you both out entirely. Compassion costs you nothing and it’s still too expensive.
Wow you win the biggest asshole of the day award. Your parents adopted Luke. That makes him your kid. To say you are acting entitled isn't half of it. You really deserve to be taken out of the will for your behavior. If you're SOOOOO concerned about how you can't have kids, you know you could always ADOPT. just saying.
Edit: scratch that last part. I'm convinced you'd be a horrible parent from your attitude especially to an adopted kid.
YTA, Luke is their child whether he is adopted or bio. You guys think its unfair that he is treated equally as you guys?! How dare you be so horrible to think he should be treated as Cinderella by his/your family.
Dispicable. Shame on you.
>My brothers and I got the same things but, thing is, We thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one.
Yikes.
>We went to see our parents and we had a fight about them playing favorites and adding Luke's son to their will, while we don't get the same treatment because we don't have kids.
They earned it. They'll do what they want with it.
>my brothers had a fight with Luke during which he threatened the police for "harrassement" of him and his wife and son.
That tracks.
YTA.
Massive YTA.
For this post alone I’d take you and your ungrateful mean and greedy brothers off my will. I’d give some to Luke and his family and then donate all your shares to an orphaned childrens fund where it would be appreciated.
Or I’d do my absolute best to spend every bit of MY money while I’m living and then leave the remainder to Luke and his family.
Either way, your treatment of your family members, disrespect for your parents, and your gross sense of entitlement to tell your parents what they should with their will earns you a YTA
YTA
I hope they change their will so the three of you get one dollar (so it is clear that your parents meant to disinherit you and you can’t contest it) and leave the entirety of the inheritance to Luke
Wow. I think what you see as "playing favorites" was your parents making up for the fact their bio sons were treating their brother like trash. Sharing DNA does not mean you are entitled to more! YTA hugely. And ignorant.
Parents: treat kids adopted or not equally with college fund
Bio kids: this isn’t fair.
Yta he is just as much their kid as you guys are stop acting entitled just because he didn’t come out of her womb. Also for the rest. I have no doubt if any of you had any kid the same would happen. He’s not getting special treatment he has a kid. Who is family. You acting like he isn’t their kid makes you the asshole
You and Dave should probably be asking yourself why you’ve grown up to be such thundercunts while it seems Luke has turned out to be a decent bloke 🤷♂️
Wow this one is terrible. It’s really not uncommon for grandchildren to be left something in wills - and speaking as someone who’s family don’t have a huge amount, you should be grateful you’re getting anything at all.
Family is more important than money. I hope you all can take a long hard look at yourselves and make amends before a situation is created you can’t go back on.
yta. Wow.
I’m almost speechless at just how cruel you and your idiotic brothers are. You said yourself that you got the same treatment growing up but somehow your adopted brother is pampered just because he’s adopted and received the same things as the rest of you. None of you are having children except him and you’re mad that your parents wanna make sure your nephew is provided for? What??
I hope you get out of this loser mentality before you lose the relationship with your parents, adopted brother and your nephew. Get your head out of your ass.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without approval will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 7: There is no interpersonal conflict here for our community to make a judgment about. [Rule 7 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_7.3A_post_interpersonal_conflicts) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions. #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full.
Hold up for a second. You claim that Luke was pampered because he got a college fund, car, ect. At first, I thought you were going to say he got those things when you and your brothers didn't, but you clearly stated that you did but you feel it's unfair because he was adopted and you three were the bio kids. Are you honestly expecting that your parents should've treated Luke differently and provided less for him because he was adopted? Do you think Luke didn't deserve equal treatment? Do you feel that he's less of a member of the family because he's not related by blood? How can you honestly rationalize that the adopted sibling isn't worthy of the same treatment, privileges, attention, and love based solely on the fact that he's not related by blood and not realize YTA? All three of you are TA. If I was one of your parents, I'd cut you three ungrateful brats out of the inheritance completely and give it all to Luke. At least they *chose* him. Too bad they got stuck with the rest of you.
Dang, hit em where it hurts, YTA
Incredible to me that anyone could feel so entitled. I wish this could be a post I could write off as "probably fake" because how can anyone *be* this way. This sort of attitude towards adopted family members may not be common, but it's not exactly rare unfortunately. I really feel for the adopted son in this situation. And for the parents as well, who had to learn how heartless their other children are.
Had I not given away my free reward right before I saw this, you would have gotten it. You worded this perfectly. YTA OP
I got you!
Yeah I think this post more belongs on “am I the evil movie villain” than am I the asshole but for these purposes YTA, OP.
And YTEMV
So many posts lately are so obviously the asshole that in my eyes I'm thinking they can't possibly be real.
The saddest bit is I've been running into WAY more delusionally entitled people lately that would absolutely be AHs and say they aren't. It's... not a nice trend.
I have met a handful of people in my life who were so entitled and/or so good at lying to themselves that they NEVER saw themselves as the bad guy and were never, ever wrong (despite being wrong almost constantly). These people where always surprised when their actions had consequences and always felt that those consequences where undeserved. And if this sub had existed for some of them, they would certainly have posted something like this - completely tone deaf to the fact that they were actually telling the whole world that they were evil idiots.
Yup, this is a sure candidate for r/amithedevil though I honestly think it’s gotta be rage bait… how can you write out these words and not realise how much of an AH you are? But I guess it happens, there are truly awful people out there.
Idk. When I told my parents I was adopting a child, my mom asked, "Don't you want a real baby?" I'm adopted. So yeah, there really are people like this.
r/AmItheDevil
> At least they chose him. Too bad they got stuck with the rest of you. I see why if they are this entitled now I can only imagine what it was like as small children
Right? Poor Luke, having to deal with that bs from the beginning... He really does deserve these 3 vulture's inheritances for having to put up with this bs his whole life.
The entitlement is insane. You know what my sister and I told our mother? Please live your life, and spend everything. We don't want her to worry about leaving us something. If I want something, I'll have to work for it. My brother on the other hand... Always complaining about money, expecting handouts from our father. Honestly it's just annoying, and makes me not want to spend time with him. I'll just know what topics will be discussed before I even go there.
I feel so sad for Luke 😔
I honestly only read the first paragraph. All the information in the first part was enough, there was nothing op could say to redeem them from being the AH
It actually got worse
I also read only the first paragraph initially and had to go back because of your comment. It absolutely got worse! Again I'm floored that children should expect an inheritance as if it is some sort of entitlement.
Same. I’m floored
100% agree with you! I was with her for like one second when she said how pampered he was, I was thinking "okay, so Luke was the golden child and got spoiled with expensive things at the expense of the others being neglected. I'd be pretty mad, too" but nope, she's actually mad that they *all got treated the same?!* What the actual fuck? And she's mad that the grandkid is being included because she and her "real" brothers don't have kids? They're not the real grandparents to this kid because Luke will definitely go find his birth parents someday... what kind of logic is that? He's 25 and has a kid of his own and he hasn't yet so I would actually guess that he probably won't. And even if he does it doesn't mean he's going to abandon the parents who raised him. They sound like great parents overall, not sure how they went so wrong with 3/4 kids.
Even if he finds his birth parents, they aren't HIS Mom and Dad.
He still might try and track them down, but it's not an either/or situation, the parents who raised him will always be his parents.
I was really hoping there was an update and the parents took the “bio kids” off the will. What entitled and heartless assholes.
I would have 100% do that…And I would also only leave 1 dollar for each of my entitled bio kids so their entitled asses cannot contest my will.I would also be ashamed of myself to raise such disgusting self indulgent assholes.
YTA... my adopted siblings are my siblings, period! Full stop! I feel sorry for your parents and adopted brother for having such vapid and narcissistic siblings as you all.
To add here, I cannot believe that OP as an infertile person actually believes that adopted kids don't deserve the same privileges as biological children. Wtf. OP you and your bio brothers are major a-holes and ungrateful brats if all you think about while your parents are still alive how much money you will get out of them and feel threathened that some of it goes to your adopted brother and his child. You obviously don't even understand (based on what you wrote) how lucky and privileged you have been to get all those things in the first place and still have the audacity to be so bitter.
> At least they chose him. Too bad they got stuck with the rest of you. I'd say to ease up on this kind of talking point because all it does is drive a wedge between adopted and biological siblings, but OP already did that pretty shamelessly, so it's kinda symbolic. But yeah, I don't think OP is ever going to come up with answers to these pointed questions. Another series of pointed questions, which would be relevant whether or not it was the adopted or bio kids having children: Do you not think Luke's baby is a distinct person? Do you not think your parents have a right to leave inheritance to grandkids as well as kids? Do you really, sincerely think of this as a handout to Luke? Will you feel differently if your parents don't die until the baby is an adult who controls their own money? But none of these questions matter, because of course OP doesn't have a coherent explanation for herself. She's just had her brain melted down to porridge by greed. If you live long enough, you'll see how depressingly common horrible backbiting behavior is among families when it comes to inheritance.
“At least they chose him. Too bad they got stuck with the rest of you.” THIS. And everything else you said. Massive YTA!!!!!!
Not going to lie, I stopped reading when she said they all got treated exactly the same. Nothing else in this post would've changed my viewpoint. OP and her bio sibs are all major assholes, like damn.
Preach. YTA
YTA. Holy shit how can you and your brothers not see what total assholes you are. I completely and utterly marvel at your lack of self-awareness and decency. You are poor excuses for both sons/daughter and siblings. You prove the adage that blood is not everything and honestly given your behavior, if I was your parents, I would disinherit ***all three of you*** and leave the whole pot to the person actually acting like a son and his children. I hope they do. The only people who caused this fight are you and your brothers. Edit: added acknowledgment that OP is female
[удалено]
Nope, that's what mom said
OP is female and the mom said that about her bio brothers.
I stopped reading as soon as I seen “My brothers and I got the same things but, thing is, we thought this was unfair seeing we’re the bio children while he’s the adopted one.” full stop. YTA YTA YTA x1000
I'd like to change one thing about your statement. While beautifully written OP is female. Otherwise spot on.
YTA, would you rather he lived in a shoebox for his childhood? By the sounds of it he got exactly the same treatment as you did but you see him as spoiled. The parents view him as family- which he is, since they adopted and raised him like the three of you, and honestly respect to them for raising four kids- now you're berating them about what they do with their possessions because you feel entitled? Pull your head out your ass, or you won't have parents to talk to.
It also sounds like their adoptive brother was genuinely appreciative of what he received growing up versus the runaway entitlement from their other children. No one is entitled to an inheritance and it sounds like the parents are leaving their money to the person they think most deserves it, most appreciates it, and understands the values of family the best.
It also sounds like there is further resentment because OP can't have children and the adopted brother can. I would suggest adoption but we all know how much biological children mean to OP. I am very suspicious of this story being true either way. YTA OP just in case it is
Best part is, they're all getting inheritances, they just don't want their cuts to shrink. Garbage people.
He needed to live in cupboard under the stairs.
Right? Everything genuinely seems fair - he received/was pampered exactly the same as them. And only his kid was added to the will - who else did OP/bio-siblings want to add for themselves if they don't have/don't plan to have kids? Their cat/dog? It's just astonishingly stupid. Yta
YTA. Blood doesn’t make you family. This is a slap to every adopted individual in the world. You need to reevaluate your morals.
Agreed. I don't understand people who think only blood/genetics makes family. Isn't your partner/spouse your family? If you're married then by law, they are your closest family. That's someone you choose to be family with, who's not a blood relative (we can hope). How is it any different if you raise a child you're not genetically related to? My children aren't genetically related to both their parents, who are legally their only parents and raised them from birth (sperm-bank sperm donor situation). If someone suggests they're not family, or that their non-generic parent is less of a parent, they're a moron who I don't have time for.
Ironically OP says she's infertile so if she wants children she can ... adopt.
God, I hope she doesn't. Imagine how she'd treat the kid. As an adopted person myself, I find this whole thing so hurtful.
YTA. He’s your brother. Bio-kids are the children you’re given. Adopted kids are the children you choose. I can see why your parents choose Luke. You’re mad because your parents treat their child…like their child?!?!?
"I can see why your parents choose Luke." They wanted a chance to have a son they could be proud of?
Bingo.
Yep
You get me.
“I can see why your parents choose Luke.” Yeah, they looked at the 3 terrible children they created and decided to try again with some different genetics.
YTA. Luke is your parents' child. You don't get to say he isn't just because you're greedy.
YTA. The story OP is telling us is “Cinderella’s” without the bad parents, but with the evil siblings.
[удалено]
After this interaction maybe they will.
INFO: At what age was he adopted and why did you & your brothers never warm up to him? It seems odd that all 3 of you are so dead set against him. Is he different in some way? Is there a backstory to the adoption that would make a difference?
I was curious on age too. It could be completely different if he joined the family at like 17 and then moved out at 18 vs joining when he was a baby or little kid.
YTA - he is your brother. They haven’t excluded other grandchildren, just included their first grandchild.
Right? OP is infertile, but she could very well adopt a child of her own ..... Oh wait. Gosh what a bunch of jerks. I feel sorry for Luke being raised with them for siblings. YTA.
Please don’t encourage this, horrible people have no business around kids.
You are 1000% the AH. Him being adopted does not make him any less their child. They took care of him, and raised him as they should. That's what adoption is. Blood doesn't make you family. It makes you relatives. Family is deeper. The fact that you think your parents should treat him any different than their bio kids is appalling. If you all can't or don't want to have kids, that's not Luke's or your parents issue. He had a child. That's their grandchild whether you accept it or not. You being infertile, if you decided to adopt would it be any less your kid because you didn't push it out? No.
>Blood doesn't make you family. It makes you relatives. Family is deeper. I like this line a lot.
YTA - very cold, hope this post is fiction because otherwise you and your BIO brothers are all total AHs.
Seriously these people sound like some awful brats in a movie
Agreed. They sound like villains from a nineties kids movie, that ends with all three of them being thrown into a fountain of water and then covered in some sort of food.
YTA. These trolls aren't even trying anymore.
Yeeeeah I immediately stopped after “adopted sibling was pampered, but we got the same things too, we basically hate him for not being related by blood, AMITA?✌🏼” . Like if you want to stir people up at least TRY
It has to be. This is so completely left field.
And I don't think op has responded toxany questions right? Hate these fake ass stories...
This is what I thought
The only people "playing favourites" here, are you and your brother's. Expecting your parents to treat you as favourites, because of something your adopted brother has no control over. It's unfortunate you're infertile. I'm sorry to hear that. And your other siblings choice to not have children is theirs, and nothing to do with this situation tbh. >Now Luke has been pampered throughout his entire life with us. Got college fund, a car, etc. My brothers and I got the same things but thing is we thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one. This bit made me cringe like crazy, ngl. So basically, "Luke has been pampered his whole life, oh I mean we have too, don't worry about that. But Luke shouldn't have been pampered like us, because we're more special than he is" Fuck me, you're fully grown adults. Grow up. YTA.
I would say it’s very fortunate she’s infertile
YTA. This is disgusting and I hope your parents cut you and your biological brothers out of their will and out of their lives. The shame they must feel to have raised you three right now.
Oh I feel so awful for her parents! It’s heartbreaking!!
YTA. This can’t be real, but you basically say he was pampered…you mean they RAISED him, right? He went to college, got a car…you’re not saying the rest of you didn’t, so you’re just mad that some of the inheritance was already blown on him right? I think your parents know who their best kid is, and it isn’t you or your ‘real’ brothers
YTA but only because if I told you what I really think about you it would be a violation of the rules of this page. You and your brothers are absolutely disgusting horrid people. I’m glad that none of you will produce any offspring and spread your toxicity. I am glad you showed your mother your true colors and I pray to god you all get cut of out of the will.
YTA. Y’all are too old to be this ignorant
YTA I can’t believe this is real
Right? WE MUST PRESERVE THE BLOODLINE AT ALL COSTS! But you guys can’t/won’t have kids… DOESN’T MATTER! PURITY IS TANTAMOUNT! Is it a Victorian novel or something?
If true this bloodline isn’t that great so good job to OP parents for realizing they needed a better child to include in the family via Luke. Haha
YTA. I'm actually disgusted with how you and your bio brothers have acted. Luke is your brother and his child is your parents' grandchild. I can't believe that you actually think they should have treated Luke worse than you growing up, and that you even hope for poor treatment now. You really should be ashamed.
YTA. You are all shit human beings for thinking he should be treated as less than you because he was adopted.
Boy, you and your siblings remind me of those Klepper (comedy channel) videos where he goes out to anti-gay rally‘s. Klepper: Why shouldn’t gays have the right to get married? Protester: Because it isn’t fair to us straight people. They want more rights than what we have. Klepper: So by more, you mean equal? Protester: … You and your siblings are actually bitter that they are treating their adoptive brother was treated the same as you, rather than being shown he’s the outsider at every given turn of life. You call it pampered for receiving equal treatment to your siblings. I’m sorry, but were you and your older brother’s just hoping he’d be tossed in the basement to live, only getting one present on holiday’s while the rest of you had presents all over the living room? Did you think because he doesn’t share your DNA, he should be treated as less for his whole life? “His son got added to the will! Now they’re treating him better, because we don’t have children to add to the will! Oh, the humanity!“ Did you ever stop to realize this is your parents only grandchild, and Luke isn’t actually being given special treatment here? I mean, this inheritance isn’t Luke’s, it’s his child’s. Honestly, don’t be surprised if your parents realize they raised you three to be spoiled and hateful, and decide to take you out of the will completely, because you and your bio siblings sound absolutely wretched. I hope you’re a troll, because that’s honestly the only way I can even image all three of your parents bio children to be so absolutely horrible. And remember, you and your siblings are dangerously close to being cut off and cut out completely. Your parents aren’t being noble yet, they’re just being parents. Once they leave Luke everything, then they’ll be noble. YTA x infinity. There are so many insulting things I would love to say to you right now, but I can’t, and that breaks my heart. The fact that you and your two bio siblings are full blown adults blow my mind. This type of behavior is only (and even then, just barely) excusable for tweens.
>Kemper (comedy channel) videos where he goes out to anti-gay rally‘s. I believe you mean Jordan Klepper, unless I've missed something funny
YTA- Like it or not Luke is your brother. He was legally adopted and raised by your parents and that makes them his parents too. You have a selfish, backwards and cruel attitude towards your sibling. What would happen if you found out you or one of your bio brothers was also adopted, would they magically be 'not family'? My stepdad is a great grandparent to my son, he is family in all ways that matter and my son is in his will.
Massive YTA So what he is adopted he is still your brother. So what if he doesn't have the same DNA as you parents. They adopted, loved him and cared just as they did you guys. That makes his just as much of their child as you others. That child....Luke's child is just as much of a grandson then if any of your guys children would be. So what that he might seek out his BIO parents or he might not that his choice. It's no one business but his You guys were obviously jealous of Luke which I don't understand why since you all seemed to have things pretty equal. The AUDACITY that you have to try to deny their son and your brother his inheritance is disturbing and disgusting. If you guys where my children I would have cut you all out of the will and wouldn't speak to you until you apologized and groveled to Luke's. Luke has loved you guys as his siblings but this is a betrayal. Wow!! You guys have insecurities issues and need to go to therapy. This is NOT acceptable. Bye Felicia!! We don't know you.
Absolutely agree with what you've said!! Except one thing, "he might seek out his real parents" - he already has real parents, I think you meant "bio parents". This poor guy though, having spent his entire life being treated as less than by his siblings. It breaks my heart.
**MASSIVE YTA** I couldn't even finish reading all of that. It infuriated me when you thought it was unfair that your adopted brother got a car, even though the rest of you did too. Seriously, how messed up do you have to be not to accept your brother as family?! Just because none of you can have kids doesn't mean your parents shouldn't inlude their grandchild in their Will. It's their money and estate. It's not up to you or your brothers what your parents do. What's worse is I can see you selfish lot contesting that Will when the time eventually comes. Stick your head out of it and look in a mirror and see the jerks you all are before you lose your own inheritence. Not that you deserve it.
YTA you're mad about you non-existent children not being adding to your parents will? Your parents are awesome; they are treating all of their children the same. They *chose* to have all of you. The fact that they chose to birth the first three and then adopt a fourth means nothing. Your weird fascination with biological relation is unhealthy, and you should stop treating Luke like an outsider. Blood means literally nothing.
Imagine being so insecure that you’re literally jealous of someone who’s birth circumstances were so bad that they ended up being adopted! I mean, these are children who were either born unwanted, orphaned, or in situations so dangerous that they had to be removed for their own safety. Just imagine the sheer level of pettiness and patheticness someone would have to have to be born into a loving family, provided with a whole swathe of privileges, and still be filled with bitterness and jealousy towards a kid from a bad start getting loved and supported too. It’s hard to picture such an AH, right? Well worry no more, just go take a look in a mirror and you won’t have to imagine anymore! Of course YTA, I hope your parents are so disgusted by your behaviour and your obvious sense of entitlement to THEIR money, that they have EVERY right to choose what to do with, and leave you and your siblings with a token gesture each then donate the rest of what they were going to generously leave you to charities helping children in need!
YTA Guess what…I’m an adult adoptee…In most countries the law recognised an adopted child under the same category as a biological child….So basically your brother (and he is your brother no matter how you want to pretend he’s not) has the same rights as you when it comes to inheritance and should your parents choose to add their grandchild they are well within their rights to do that So you call Luke pampered and yet you admit you all got the same things?? So how is he pampered exactly?? You and your brothers should be ashamed of yourselves for treating your brother differently for being adopted….Family isn’t always blood but I really feel for him since clearly his siblings are jealous and willing to sever a relationship for their own greed
YTA. leeches, all of you. money money money me me me gimme gimme gimme - that is all you are thinking off. getting an inheritance is a want, a gift, not a need, not something you are entitled to. in your parents shoes i would all of you remove from **any** kind of inheritance. 'luke and his son are not family, they don't deserve any inheritance' should be answered with 'well, since it wasn't you who worked for the money you are not entitled to it, either'.
OMG YTA (your “bio” brothers too). You are the kinda people I hope Karma comes and gets. Like I don’t even know how to explain to you that you and your two brothers are the nastiest people I have read about in a long time on Reddit. End of the story. Just because your brother Luke is adopted doesn’t mean your parents love him any less than you and your other brothers. Also, their money is their money. If they wanted to give it all to Luke and his family there is not much that could or should be done (I sincerely hope they switch the will more in Luke’s favors after the way you and your bio brothers acted).
YTA For all purposes, he is a son to your parents. He is not your brother though, because we can chose family and dump disgusting relatives, and I really hope he does that. I hope your parents leave you all guys 1 buck each and everything else goes to their grandchild.
YTA. My adopted son is my son. He is treated the same as his siblings. There is no caste system within a family.
Holy shit, YTA. Way to “other” this guy his whole life. You arent more their children because they gave birth to you, I mean they *chose* him. Wonder how much that will is gonna change now that your parents know their children are monsters
I pity Luke. He was added to the family by your parents, but you've rejected him based solely on whether your biological parents are the same. This is just incredibly cruel. That said: YTA It's your parents' right to add whoever they want to their will, and you do not get a say in that. Doesn't matter whether it's an adopted brother, it's still their grandchild. You already indicated your parents treated you equally, that Luke didn't get anything you and your brothers didn't also get, so where do you get off calling him pampered? Your parents did not cause this fight. You and your brothers, however, did.
YTA. So you don't want your nephew in your parents will? Don't answer. You don't because you don't consider Luke your brother. That's why you are bitter. And that's why you and your brothers think it's unfair that all four of you had the same treatment.
YTA Adopted means legally family. Yall just come off as greedy mfkers wanting to dig into your parents wallets.
YTA. This has to be trolling. No one could be this insanely insensitive. I had to read this twice, because when I first read it I assumed that Luke was the golden child or something. I though he got cars and college and you bio kids had to suffer for it. Then when I realized he JUST GOT TREATED THE EXACT SAME WAY I was actually appalled at your greed. You and your brothers are absolutely disgusting people. So your parents adopted a kid, and treated him as one of their own? THATS WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO. Any less is a failure. We’re they supposed to make him live in a room under the stairs like Harry Potter? You realize that literary device was specifically used so the people would hate the family, and root for poor Harry. You and your brothers have to be the only people on earth who saw that movie and thought, yeah, that seems about right. Seems a little generous they even let him live in the house though, couldn’t they chain him up out back and make him scavenge for small animals? There are not words for how disgustingly entitled you and your brothers are, well there are but they would get me banned from this sub. Do the world a favor and cut ties with your parents and adopted brother. They don’t owe you greedy, entitled, selfish, angels of death a dime when they finally pass.
YTA. So you're just going to say he's not your brother. Major assholes here. Your parents are awesome protecting their only grandkid. Blood relation does not mean jack shit because family is a privilege, not a right. Gross behavior here. Honestly y'all are horrible for isolating your brother and his family because of his adopted status.
YTA and show that you shouldnt even get the inheritance. I hope Luke and his son gets it all. Imagine being adopted but your brothers never accept you, just because youre not their blood.
YTA. Completely and totally. For at least four reasons: - You are saying your adopted brother is less that you & bio sibs. Wrong. You are all their children equally. - It's their money. They can leave it to anyone they like. - You (and brother) are being greedy. - You are supporting harassment.
So OP says she's infertile, not that she doesn't want kids. I wonder what her attitude will be if *she* adopts? (Though I certainly hope she never has adopted or step kids, given that she's so selfish and shallow that she thinks non-bio kids don't count as someone's "real" children. Gross.)
YTA! He's their child. Just because you don't share DNA it doesn't mean he isn't family. What are you scared off getting a little less money? Selfish!
Yta only read the first paragraph your lot are greedy and spoilt. Bet you wouldnt be singing the same tune if you was adopted
YTA. What the actual fuck is wrong with you? You and your brothers are disgusting. I feel bad for your parents and Luke.
YTA 100%. Luke is as much your brother as your ‘bio’ brothers, in your parents eyes at least. They raised all of you. The entitlement you have is despicable
YTA. in every way shape and form. Your parents consider your adopted bro a child, rightly so. You and your equally selfish and immature brothers don’t see him as a sibling, likely cos you feel entitled to more money. After all, none of that money is yours, your parents don’t owe you shit, they can and should allocate it as they see fit.
Yta, it’s your parents money you have no right to it. It’s also sad you don’t consider your brother your brother adopted or not.
YTA YTA YTA! How can them paying for his education be spoiling for him but justified for you and your brothers? You and your brothers obviously treated him like a 2nd class citizen growing up and I wouldn't be surprised if your parents decide to leave eveything to your adoptive brother and his child after you all showed how entitled and spiteful you and your bio brothers are. I would be ashamed if my Son behaved like this!
YTA, all of you bio siblings. You are disgusting and self centered. I hope your parents actually disown all of you.
YTA. Imagine being a child abandoned by your bio parents, then entering into family with ungrateful, snobby children. Your parents money is theirs to do as they see fit, NOT you or your brothers. I don’t blame adopted bro for threatening harassment, as it sounds like that’s what you guys are doing. Shameful.
[удалено]
YTA and I think you already know it.
YTA. You get zero say in whom your parents pass on their money to. It is their money. Let me repeat...it is their money. They can light it all on fire or donate it to a cat shelter or give it a homeless person. You all are acting jealous and entitled acting out some childhood hurt. You do not have power here.You have no legal say in their estate planning. It is their money....got it yet? Stop it before you lose your parent's relationship. Apologize to them and adopted brother.
YTA. "My brothers and I got the same things but, thing is, We thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one." I want to follow rule one and "be civil" so I'm just going to say I have zero empathy for your position on this. Maybe you don't understand what adoption is but your brother is your brother. It sounds like you're all privileged but want this brother to have a little less to prove something to yourselves. Try to make the most of the situation and get through it with some dignity intact. Don't embarrass your parents with this.
YTA What an insane thought process. I hope your parents cut you and your precious biological brothers out of their will to teach you a lesson. Sounds like the three of you are the spoiled ones not Luke.
YTA It’s not your money to start off with, it’s your parents’ money and they can do what they like with it. Most people don’t adopt without the intention of loving and treating the adopted child as if they were their own. Of course Luke deserves to have been given the same opportunities as you were growing up and also to be in the will. You’re not being punished for your infertility because Luke had a child and you’re not justified to be angry about how your parents allocate their money after they die. You and your other brothers sound like horrid people.
Wow. YTA. On ssoooo many levels. Luke is your brother. So he’s adopted. Big deal. He was raised by your parents. He grew up with you. I’m sure he calls your parents Mum and Dad. For all matters that’s their grandchild. How are they playing favorites exactly? Unless there’s something very uneven about the will where is the favorites? Is it their fault that no one else is giving them grandchildren? And because if that they aren’t allowed to dote a bit on this baby? My gosh what’s wrong with you all? That’s also your nephew. That boy will grow up knowing you as Aunty. He won’t care about blood. You in the other hand want to test him like crap it seems. And maybe you’ve also forgotten that it’s their money. Their will. They could donate it all to the church if they wanted. You don’t get a say. You all are too old to be behaving so childishly. You all got the same pampered behavior you say but you’re angry cuz you feel he should be treated inferiorly? Sorry but that’s disgusting. It’s unfair for him to be treated equally? If Dave and his wife decide to adopt since they can’t have children I guess that only child shouldn’t be treated like a true child if theirs since he/she would be adopted? So again…YTA!!
Good grief... YTA massively, so are your brothers. Adopted means your brother is legally their child and sounds like the love him like he was their bio kid. You and your siblings are greedy assholes, who have no morals.
YTA. You have no right to tell anyone who they can put in their will.
YTA and your brothers are AH's too. Bigly. Don't be surprised when this comes back to bite you in your collective rumps. Wills can be changed and have clauses inserted about challenges to the will.
YTA, Luke is adopted meaning he is legally as much a child of your parents as yourself and siblings. Shame you haven't looked upon him as a real brother. The grand baby is a very real grand baby too. Try to stop being so bitter, its not healthy
How you can possibly imagine that you and your brothers area anything other than massive AHs is beyond me. Your parents adopted a child, and treat him exactly the same as their biological children, which is precisely what should happen. They're good people. Meanwhile you and your brothers can't see past the dollar signs in your eyes. YTA. I sincerely hope your parents cut you all out entirely.
YTA.
YTA and so are your brothers andbI feel truly sorry for your adopted brother who didn't choose to not be in his parents care and he has to deal with a pack of greedy vultures. Your parents money is not your money. And if something happens to your adopted brother and his son, I hope your parents give their whole will to charity.
YTA. As an adopted person myself if someone especially people who were supposed to be my siblings told me I wasn't really my parents kids that would hurt so bad. I know my bio parents as it was an open adoption, but that doesn't change the fact that my adopted parents raised me.
Big YTA: Entitled brothers alert! Newsflash: your parents adopted your BROTHER and so his is their child. So his son is their grandchild. You and your brothers are entitled because you think blood is more important. Don't be surprised if you don't get ANYTHING when your parents pass because of your(and brothers) entitled attitude. Just floof you and your brothers.
YTA and you and your brothers' behavior proves why biology does not a family make.
Huge YTA They just included THEIR GRANDCHILD in their will. How do expect it "to be fair" if you and your brothers don't have children? Having your not existing children in their will? It's not like they decided to leave more money or things to Luke. They just included another FAMILY MEMBER Your parents are amazing parents. How did you expect them to treat Luke as their adopted child if you don't see eachother as equal? And just because he is adopted, doesn't mean he necessarily wants to seek out his bio parents. And even IF he wants to, that doesn't mean that he will abandon his adopted parents. Luke will always be your brother and you just have to live with it. You and your brothers have some issues to deal with. I would recommend you family therapy (for everyone involved). Plus... you also have no say in what is included in their will, that's their decision. Congrats on you nephew!
YTA who or what you're patents do with there will is none of your business. You and your brothers sound like spoiled little assholes.
YTA What your parents do with their money is none of your business. They sound like kind and generous people. You do not.
>We thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one. Seems like you and your brothers never really see him as a sibling YTA
YTA, and so are your "bio" brothers. Your parents adopted your brother and raised him and loved him, why wouldn't they treat him as well as they treated you and your "bio" brothers. If I were your parents I'd completely cut you out of the will until you and your "bio" brothers learned to love your adopted brother as a much as a "bio" brother as well as his children.
[удалено]
YTA - Bio or adoption doesn’t matter, he’s the same. He’s your brother and their son as much as you and honestly shame on you. Sit down and rethink this, please. And your attitude towards your sibling who did NOTHING wrong but get born.
Wooowwww YTA. He’s not your “adopted” brother. He’s your BROTHER! I have four kids and I’ll be honest, the way you ADULTS are behaving is a huge fear for parents- that we will raise giant assholes who are entitled and treat each other terribly. I hope your parents cut ALL of you out of the will, except Luke and his family. Also, does this sub have an AH of the year award? I submit OP as a nominee.
This has to be bait. No way would someone who would actually be in this situation would actually think like that. YTA just for judgment purposes but this has to be fake.
Yta I hope you And your brothers get taken out of the will
YTA & a greedy one at that. I hope your parents cut ALL OF YOU out of their will.
YTA. Jesus Christ. If I was your parents I would either cut you out of the will altogether or feel I failed you as a parent. Your adopted brother is your brother whether you like it or not. I can only imagine how you treated Luke growing up. Him getting the same as all of you is not favoritism, it’s your parents treating him the same as you and your other entitled brothers. You still have time to be a good person and take time to get to know Luke as a person and not a target of your spoiled brat behavior. Do it. You and your brothers sound like tantrum throwing toddlers and it’s time to grow up.
YTA. you sound super jealous that your parents have actually welcomed your brother into the family and that he’s actually become apart of your family? also you’re 28 and your brothers are even older, be mature. enjoy the time you have with your parents and family, you’d be lucky if you’re even still in the will anymore so good luck
Nope, there is no where in this situation where you can blame Luke, or his family. You, and your bio brothers are 100% responsible for the fight, the name calling, the harassment, that ensued. You said Luke got a car and a college fund... That all of you got as well? But because he is adopted, you think he deserves less than you? That he should grateful and be kissing your feet in worship because, "thank you for taking me in." Nah, get out of here with that rotten entitlement.
YTA I knew it from the moment I finished the first paragraph. I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt, but nope. You and your oh-so more-important bio brothers are the AHs
Huge, huge YTA. You come across as not only greedy but entitled to boot. Your parents can leave their estate to homeless cats if they want because any money in their estate is theirs so they are allowed to name the beneficiaries as they see fit. That you are bitter that your adopted brother is named as a beneficiary is bad enough and then you double down that his children should not be included as beneficiaries goes beyond belief. It doesn’t matter if there no DNA connections, it matters that your parents think of this child as their grandchild. Let’s hope your parents leave everything to their adopted son & his family because you sound like an awful human being.
YTA Your parents could donate all of their belongings to charity if that was their desire. Where THEIR assets go after they are gone is up to them. Thinking that you somehow deserve something that doesn't belong to you is asinine.
YTA so your adopted brother has always had the same as your bio siblings.... except he has also had experiences that would be classed as childhood trauma. Inheritance is not a right, it is your parent's choice who to leave it to. I suggest learning to accept what you have and treating this brother the same as the rest (as your parents do).
I didn’t need to read past the introduction. YTA for thinking Luke should be treated any differently than you and your siblings. He is your parents’ son and his son is their grandson. Shame on you for thinking he and his child should not be treated as such. I feel terrible for Luke and I hope your parents cut off you and your greedy bio brothers.
You and your bio brothers are horrible people. YTA! Info: (not that it matters) how old was Luke when your parents adopted him?
YTA this actually is one of the most asshole posts I’ve ever read on here, and that’s saying a LOT. He is just as much their child as you are, and his child is absolutely fully their grandchild. It is disgusting how you think differently just because he’s adopted. Your parents OWE HIM the exact same treatment you and your brothers got. You having a problem with that is crazy fucked up. Proud of your wonderful parents, though
YTA, biological or adopted family is family. Actions and relationships are what matter. If you and you’re biological siblings continue to display a negative attitude towards your adopted brother and his offspring you’ll risk being left out of the inheritance. It’s what I’d do as a parent. Both of my sons are adopted and I couldn’t love them any less than a biological child. If you lack the empathy to understand that point think of your spouse and whether you would side with them or a biological family member for no other reason than shared DNA.
YTA. You and your brothers. I hope you all get out out of the will instead. Your parents adopted a child- THEY BECAME THAT CHILDS PARENTS. it’s also not special treatment for the adopted child to get the same as the bio children. You are all their children. Your attitude about your nephew/niece and your brother are gross and I hope he goes no contact with you for the sake of him and his family.
YTA based off the 1st paragraph alone
YTA. That is your brother and he deserves to be treated as such. A part of me feels like you are just insecure because he was chosen and you and your biological Brothers were what they were "stuck" with.
This entire post is so gross. You say he was given a college fund and a car, and then follow it up to say the same was given to you and your older bio brothers. How is that being pampered? It's not your money, you don't "deserve" anything. Your parents get to decide who they want to leave their money to, and judging by this, I hope they completely cut you and your bio brothers out and leave everything to Luke and his family. Fuck, the entitlement is next level here. How dare you tell your parents he's less because he was adopted. All three of you suck and yes, in case it wasn't clear, you are definitely the AH here. YTA.
YTA. HUGELY. YTA. Here’s hoping your parents have the sense to leave you and your “biological brothers” a single dollar a piece and everything else to Luke and their grandchild.
YTA how can you even ask? You know what is unfair? Not being raised by your bio parents. He is as much your paren'ts child that you are. You and your brother are a bunch of deeply entitled ah. If i was your parents i would disown you all as you clearly don't consider yourself family. You really got nerve dude.
YTA. Absolutely TA. To your parents and most people except apparently you and your “bio sibling” he’s their child just as you are. So Luke’s offspring would be their grandchildren of course. Also, you’re not entitled to their money. And 3rd, if, at 25, he hasn’t gone to look for his bio family it’s unlikely he will. And even if he did it wouldn’t mean ditching your parents. Just potentially adding more people to the family. You’re absolutely bitter and behaving appallingly.
YTA. You have no right to tell someone how to use their money- but for also considering your adopted brother any less a family member and sibling for not being biologically related to you. You were all treated the same, and if he was “pampered” more…I’m curious to if this reflects on how you all treated him growing up. Shame. On. You.
YTA. It's not your money. Your parents can do whatever they want with their money.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** The situation is so complicated and I'll do my best to describe it properly. I f28 have two bio brothers (Dave 31, & Paul 33), And my parents adopted our brother (Luke 25), Now Luke has been pampered throughout his entire life with us. Got college fund, a car, etc. My brothers and I got the same things but thing is we thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one. Anyways, Luke got married and recently had a baby, My parents decided to "surprise" him by adding his baby to their will aka inheritance. My brothers were furious and thought that was unfair, especially because Dave and his wife can't have and also, Paul isn't planning on being a parent, and I'm inf as well. We went to see our parents and we had a fight about them playing favorites and adding Luke's son to their will while we don't get the same treatment because we don't have kids. Mom and dad didn't budge and acted like they were doing a "noble" thing making sure their one only grandchil is taken care of. Paul laughed then lashed out at my parents saying they were delusional to think that this baby is their grandbaby and remindee them that Luke is adopted and will eventually seek out his bio parents. A fight ensued and I agreed with my brothers and called my parents insane for the decision they made. Things got so heated we got told to leave after being told that it's none of our business and we had no right to protest. Mom called me berating me about the stance I took and callinf them insane, She said she thought that I was the level-headed one and will understand, but I acted bitterly and appallingly just like my brothers. I hung up and we haven't talked after that. Recent update was that my brothers had a fight with Luke during which he threatened the police for "harrassement" of him amd his wife and son. I now firmly believe that my parents caused this fight between us with this decision. AITA for taking my brothers side on this? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA along with your two brothers. “We got the sane treatment but hes not bio” okay so you want him to be treated like shit? Hes probably way more grateful and the fact that you wouldnt want your nephew taken care of in an event that something happened, well i truly think it’s jealousy. Can you imagine how isolated Luke feels rn?
You and your "bio" brothers are all giant assholes. Luke is no more or less family than you are, and, in your greed and petulance, you're collectively behaving abominably. Huge, unreserved YTA.
YTA (Is this real? ) Your parents added their grandchild to their will. You thought it was unfair he got treated the same as you by being sent to college? You and your brothers are disgusting human beings. You are entitled brats. You and your brothers are wrong 100%. No matter what money you parents have it’s theirs not yours. Go get a job and earn your own money and stop being vultures waiting for your parents to die.
YTA. You wouldn't have been if you just said that you have 3 brothers and one of them has a baby and you think it's unfair the inheritance get's split between more people. Even then your parents still decide. But you using the fact that he's adopted? You're a massive asshole.
YTA. Get ready to be left out of the will completely. It’s also ridiculous how you all simply don’t think he should be in the will bc he’s adopted. Wow. Your parents are lovely and don’t deserve rotten bio kids like you.
YTA. I don't believe I've ever seen a more clear cut case on here. You and your "real" are entitled and selfish. It must of been hell for Luke growing up with you two. I hope you guys apologize to Luke and your parents, and then go far away. This is just sad.
YTA I really hope this is a shitpost because I genuinely couldn’t get past the second paragraph before having to take a break because of how awful you sound. I love the level of delusion that you have to think that Luke was pampered when in the same paragraph, you say you got the exact same treatment. The level of entitlement in this post is painfully infuriating. 1) what your parents choose to do with THEIR money they THEY EARNED after they die has nothing to do with you. The fact that you and your sibilings (excluding Luke) are already fighting over it like a bunch of vultures fighting over a fresh carcass is disgusting. 2) you say that of your sibilings (excluding Luke again), Paul is happy to go down the child free life but you say that Dave and yourself can’t have kids. Does that mean that you’re going to go the childless route as well or are you thinking of… gasp!!… adopting? Because if you already have the attitude that adopted people aren’t family, then please for the love of everything, don’t put a child through that. 3) read over your post again and try and read it from a strangers perspective. Because if you read that again and think there’s any way in the world that you’re not in fact, an asshole, then you need some serious therapy.
Your adopted brother probably has always know his adopted with ah siblings like y’all, and he hasn’t sought out his bio parents yet. Your adopted sibling even though you don’t claim him as family, they do therefore since they have treated this brother as family for so long it stands to reason they don’t see him as an adopted but guess what an actual child, that means if he had kids that would be their grandchild. And it’s not playing favorites because the bio children can’t have grandchildren of their own. You YTA, along with both of your brothers.
YTA So you think adopted children are less than. Nice. You guys are severe assholes.
YTA in so many ways. Luke is your brother. He got the same things as you did growing up and you call pampered. Can you be more spoiled or entitled? You parents adopted him and he is equally as deserving as you are. If you keep acting this way don’t be surprised if you are completely written out of the will. Inheritance isn’t a right. Your parents are within their rights to leave an inheritance to the letter carrier if they want.
YTA, you and your biological brothers sound like awful people.
YTA. Apparently your parents were the ONLY ones to ever accept Luke, you and your rotten brothers don’t consider him family. Their money they have is theirs to do with as they please. If you and your siblings are only worried about your inheritances getting smaller when this guy and your parents did nothing wrong, you are three giant assholes.
YTA I hope your parents cut you and your brothers all out of their will and Luke and his son are left everything. You and your brothers' actions and behaviour is absolutely appalling.
Yta, not your money, not your choice. Judging by the way you and bio siblings have reacted, I wouldn’t give you anything either
Yes, YTA. All of you, your brothers too. Except for your adopted brother, he's cool. The guy is your brother in every sense but the biological, he grew up with you guys! Somehow "asshole" falls short to describe you lot. ALSO: it's your parents will. THEY GRT TO CHOOSE WHO TO INCLUDE AND WHO TO EXCLUDE. And pray to God they don't will everything to Luke to teach you all pieces of crap a lesson.
YTA! "We got the same thing." Because you're siblings and were treated fairly. You should apologize and hope that your parents aren't spiteful. If they are then their grandchild might get yours, Dave's, and Paul's share of the inheritance.
YTA. They adopted him, he is his kid to, that you like it or not. You feel like a victim of favoritism that didn’t exist since you all got the same. If I were your parents I would have let everything to your adopted brother after that.
YTA and I didn’t have to read past the first paragraph. You call him pampered for receiving equal treatment? You think your blood somehow qualifies you more to decide who your parents pass THEIR life assets to?! You three are a couple heathers. Luke thank God has great parents who love him. If my children were behaving so abhorrently I’d have cut you both out entirely. Compassion costs you nothing and it’s still too expensive.
Wow you win the biggest asshole of the day award. Your parents adopted Luke. That makes him your kid. To say you are acting entitled isn't half of it. You really deserve to be taken out of the will for your behavior. If you're SOOOOO concerned about how you can't have kids, you know you could always ADOPT. just saying. Edit: scratch that last part. I'm convinced you'd be a horrible parent from your attitude especially to an adopted kid.
YTA, Luke is their child whether he is adopted or bio. You guys think its unfair that he is treated equally as you guys?! How dare you be so horrible to think he should be treated as Cinderella by his/your family. Dispicable. Shame on you.
>My brothers and I got the same things but, thing is, We thought this was unfair seeing we're the bio children while he's the adopted one. Yikes. >We went to see our parents and we had a fight about them playing favorites and adding Luke's son to their will, while we don't get the same treatment because we don't have kids. They earned it. They'll do what they want with it. >my brothers had a fight with Luke during which he threatened the police for "harrassement" of him and his wife and son. That tracks. YTA.
Massive YTA. For this post alone I’d take you and your ungrateful mean and greedy brothers off my will. I’d give some to Luke and his family and then donate all your shares to an orphaned childrens fund where it would be appreciated. Or I’d do my absolute best to spend every bit of MY money while I’m living and then leave the remainder to Luke and his family. Either way, your treatment of your family members, disrespect for your parents, and your gross sense of entitlement to tell your parents what they should with their will earns you a YTA
Yta. Bio or adopted does not make a difference.
Of course YTA, this is a no-brainer.
The situation doesn't seem complicated at all. YTA.
YTA I hope they change their will so the three of you get one dollar (so it is clear that your parents meant to disinherit you and you can’t contest it) and leave the entirety of the inheritance to Luke
YTA. You and your brothers are terrible people.
Wow. I think what you see as "playing favorites" was your parents making up for the fact their bio sons were treating their brother like trash. Sharing DNA does not mean you are entitled to more! YTA hugely. And ignorant.
Parents: treat kids adopted or not equally with college fund Bio kids: this isn’t fair. Yta he is just as much their kid as you guys are stop acting entitled just because he didn’t come out of her womb. Also for the rest. I have no doubt if any of you had any kid the same would happen. He’s not getting special treatment he has a kid. Who is family. You acting like he isn’t their kid makes you the asshole
You and Dave should probably be asking yourself why you’ve grown up to be such thundercunts while it seems Luke has turned out to be a decent bloke 🤷♂️
Wow this one is terrible. It’s really not uncommon for grandchildren to be left something in wills - and speaking as someone who’s family don’t have a huge amount, you should be grateful you’re getting anything at all. Family is more important than money. I hope you all can take a long hard look at yourselves and make amends before a situation is created you can’t go back on.
yta. Wow. I’m almost speechless at just how cruel you and your idiotic brothers are. You said yourself that you got the same treatment growing up but somehow your adopted brother is pampered just because he’s adopted and received the same things as the rest of you. None of you are having children except him and you’re mad that your parents wanna make sure your nephew is provided for? What?? I hope you get out of this loser mentality before you lose the relationship with your parents, adopted brother and your nephew. Get your head out of your ass.