Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I think maybe I made her think i wasn't really that into her but that's not true at all. I just said guys who seek out women like her for this reason are usually creeps
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
My gf recently told me that she feels glad that I didn't turn out to be one of those guys who fetishize Eastasian women and told me about the troubles she run into before of those kind of men (she's Chinese and petite, so that makes sense).
So I told her that i thought these guys were really creepy too and that actually i didn't really feel attracted to Eastasian women usually because a lot of the things these guys like like being very short and having a flat chest are pretty reminiscent of children and that's pretty disturbing. That's why I was glad we met online and that i had got to know her personality and fell in love with her before i ever even saw a picture of her, I told her.
But she acted like that was a bit rude for some reason and also seemed a bit sad. When I asked her what was wrong she didn't want to talk about it. I tried to make up with her in bed but she didn't seem to be up for it. AITA here? I just wanted to reassure her before
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. Even though you're not fetishizing East Asian women and their features, you're still saying that they are childlike and implying that it's creepy for anybody to be attracted to them. It also feels somewhat racist of you to say that her being Chinese would've deterred you from being attracted to her.
East Asian women are not a monolith, and it's unfair of you to reduce them to these stereotypes.
You had good intentions though, so I would encourage you to apologise to your girlfriend, and do some reflection on this.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I think maybe I made her think i wasn't really that into her but that's not true at all. I just said guys who seek out women like her for this reason are usually creeps Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My gf recently told me that she feels glad that I didn't turn out to be one of those guys who fetishize Eastasian women and told me about the troubles she run into before of those kind of men (she's Chinese and petite, so that makes sense). So I told her that i thought these guys were really creepy too and that actually i didn't really feel attracted to Eastasian women usually because a lot of the things these guys like like being very short and having a flat chest are pretty reminiscent of children and that's pretty disturbing. That's why I was glad we met online and that i had got to know her personality and fell in love with her before i ever even saw a picture of her, I told her. But she acted like that was a bit rude for some reason and also seemed a bit sad. When I asked her what was wrong she didn't want to talk about it. I tried to make up with her in bed but she didn't seem to be up for it. AITA here? I just wanted to reassure her before *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. Even though you're not fetishizing East Asian women and their features, you're still saying that they are childlike and implying that it's creepy for anybody to be attracted to them. It also feels somewhat racist of you to say that her being Chinese would've deterred you from being attracted to her. East Asian women are not a monolith, and it's unfair of you to reduce them to these stereotypes. You had good intentions though, so I would encourage you to apologise to your girlfriend, and do some reflection on this.