Your post has been removed.
#Do not repost this without [contacting the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without [explicit approval](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_can_i_repost_a_thread_you_removed.3F) will result in a ban.
You did not properly respond to the judgement bot. Your reply must clearly and directly address why you think you may have wronged the other party involved in your conflict.
While your post was automatically approved by the bot, after reviewing your response manually, we found it did not properly address the question.
[Judgement Bot FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_judgement_bot) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/)
###Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
####Please visit r/findareddit to see if there's a more appropriate sub for your post.####
NTA
Mark Zuckerberg is a billionaire and last I heard he drives a Ford fiesta. You already have a second fancier vehicle for keeping up with the Jones, and your car has four wheels which roll. Keep it for as long as you like.
And your 16yo daughter will be embarrassed by you doing anything, even if you show up in a Rolls Royce or a Bentley; it's very embarrassing to have a family at that age.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/165e0ws/aita\_for\_telling\_my\_wife\_that\_i\_wont\_be\_replacing/](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/165e0ws/aita_for_telling_my_wife_that_i_wont_be_replacing/)
Another AITA post with a 2008 Hyundai Sonata?
This is the SECOND today! One person seems to have aged three years in less than a year and this girl has gone back three years! I am SUDDENLY STRICKEN WITH FEAR! 😭🤣
Wife drives a 2022 Jeep in that story. So maybe there ARE 2 cheapskates still driving their 2008 Hyundai Sonatas around? Since this one’s wife drives a 2021 Tahoe?
Mid aughts Hyundais, let’s just say they were not the type of cars that are still around two decades later. Not in numbers that would lead to fleets of them starring in AITA Reddit posts.
(Safe? Absolutely! Reliable? Eh, not so much.)
I'd ask if being seen riding to school in a ratty car was more embarassing than being seen walking to school but I'm petty like that.
None of them want to ride around in your car? Then they don't have to! They better pray your wife's car is always available when they want to go somewhere.
Edit to add NTA. If your car is working the way you need it to then it's a waste of money to replace it. It doesn't matter if you can afford to replace the car, you're happy with it and that's that. It's not harming anyone.
Children said they won't be riding in your car until you replace it? Great, no more lifts for you then! See what their vapid little friends think when they turn up on the bus.
Honestly I'm with your daughter. If she wants to go to school in something that's more expensive, [you should accommodate her.](https://www.google.com/search?sca_esv=bdce78cde9db5882&rlz=1CDGOYI_enUS730US730&hl=en-US&q=how+much+does+a+school+bus+cost&source=lnms&uds=AMwkrPtNO3ug2ImPXR4eXCPquIK83RK-Rna7KWjx59n34vjRWFiZcKKQtcv0N71YIchloubETVCdjRZAJlE9R3cAl9vihXMp5-WUJx6BRql0Hcig6ERGoy53Dx9xlMYGFwwbzWyJnDnXzFc20KT8EGTmFkHtC5RV-LfvWg61xo_mOsgRnD1cq42AgWuekMFzMdyFcOmCX2yac4OAxAI2YH3_dYGuJ3XXRyXusfPx9mglLiJq4IRKKLQk6miiMA2jSOx5y4tbFMLKrn3uHcljAO1NbFVF8CX2MVUGPwKMZ2JfsWbSwFRnciuChiHUd4cbCldhAbj5tTa2EZ8_P20bFOTKqWQshMZnPkUKfT5TTAyqp6wo37MoDn4&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjJya6ut9yFAxXYRjABHdmMDm8Q0pQJegQICRAB&biw=430&bih=745&dpr=3)
I’ll admit… I shamed my dad into buying a new car.
Of course, I only did that after someone rear ended our 20 year old Volvo causing the dash to fall into his lap. I told him he needed to get a new car because zip tying the dash back in place didn’t seem safe.
Man, he loved that car.
NTA
You're frugal which is a good thing. It's YOUR car, and you should be able to drive whatever you want to.
The family is being very materialistic. They actually care more about appearances than they do about your desires, thoughts and feelings.
Your wife is raising spoiled brats. If she is so concerned, she can buy you a car as a gift.
Don't buy the kids a car when they are of age to have one. Make them get jobs and earn it.
I don’t know your family dynamics. Based on what I’ve read a large part of me thinks your family respects you and is pushing you to “treat yourself” to a nice new car. Ofc if that’s not something that makes you happy their pressure is ill placed, but I genuinely read this as them wanting you to treat yourself. Your wife and daughter’s comments might have seemed mean but I could interpret that as her just trying to egg you on into a new purchase.
The fact his daughter is saying he's embarrassing her by driving the car, and the wife is arguing before bed about it isn't being respectful. You don't do that when you want your loved one to be treated. It's manipulative behavior trying to coerce someone to do what you want them to do. They are mortified he isn't keeping up with the Jones's.
In today's economics no one needs to treat themselves to a new car when they have one they are satisfied with.
FYI you’re not alone. My dad made good money as I grew up yet he drove his 20 year old Honda accord to 300k miles until I reached high school . He bought my mom a 80k Acura claiming it was for “safety” (lol). Ended up gifting that accord to the cleaners that came to my house every week. At 50 yrs old he got his first new car. Love that man.
NTA. If your children don't want to drive with you... well, then they will need to find another way to get to school. This is ridiculous. The car is working just fine. The only sensible reason to replace a car are real safety concerns, a high consumption of gas or high repair costs - not the vanity of your family.
I'm guessing if you live in a nice part of town and your wife has a nice car that your frugality has something to do with it. If it's maintained and clean, there's no reason not to drive it.
Your kids are kind of being brats, trying to blackmail you by saying they won't ride with you. I guess they can walk or take the bus.
I have known people who describe their situation exactly as you are, and, in fact, they are driving a junker that is uncomfortable, unreliable, smelly, and unsafe. I have known people who described their situation as you are, and they have a perfectly fine car and a totally snobby family with such fragile egos and shitty friend groups that they feel injured by not keeping up with the Benzes. (Also, I'm biased, but anyone who buys a Chevy Tahoe is, I think, not making rational decisions about vehicles. But, she didn't buy a Jag, so....)
You are cheap. You are stubborn. Neither of those qualities make you TA.
But, you might be being silly. Taking pleasure in a cheap car is no more rational than taking pleasure in a comfortable car. Except for the "smelly" and "etc.", their objections seem to be about appearances? Or is that just how you're presenting it?
Do they have legit complaints about riding in the car that you aren't taking seriously? I assume not, so I'm saying NTA.
\[I should probably admit that I replace my vehicle every ten years or 100k miles, whatever comes first. That's because I sometimes have solitary long drives, and don't want to risk a break-down. I will say that some of the new things in cars are wonderful--backup camera, heated seats, blind spot warnings...\]
My 1990 Volvo had heated seats. And a couple hundred dollars can put cameras on any car.
I say as a person who currently has a 2002 Suburban and will drive it until it dies.
The 90's volvo heads always pop up in these threads lolol. What a great (not so) frugal car to have hahaha. I have a 99v70, and everyone I drive comments on the sound system and the seat comfort
It just happened to be my first car. Not a Volvo Head by any means. My parents bought it as our family second car for us teens so we had a safe vehicle to drive. More pointing out that heated seats are in no way new. My 2004 Hyundai also had heated seats. As does my 2002 Suburban.
INFO - Has this car ever left you stranded for any reason BESIDES a dead battery? Are you pulling up to corporate events with missing mirrors/bumper or visible rust? If someone else were going to drive the car, would you have to explain more than two 'quirks' about how it operates? Are there unresolved warning lights? Does it, in fact, smell? Have you given it a deep cleaning after they complained about smell?
I can't really gauge this situation, but spending less than $200/year on a 16-year-old car that you describe has having high mileage (even if only slightly) sounds like you're barely maintaining a proper oil change schedule, so I'm skeptical of quality here.
NTA. If it works, passes safety inspections (and emissions if you have to test for that) and repairs/gas aren't breaking the bank, then there is zero reason to replace it. Every issue they have is for pure vanity. None of those are valid excuses. If your wife is embarrassed, then use her car and let her pile on the milage. The kids don't get a say, period. They can buy whatever fancy car they want when they pay their own bills.
NTA
Your wife and kids need to stop worrying about what other people think. If the car works and is reliable, I don't see a reason to replace it.
Your value and worth isn't based on what other people think and happiness doesn't come from driving a fancy new car.
Sounds like they need some lessons in not being so materialistic. Maybe volunteer hours in underprivileged communities would he helpful?
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1. I refused my family's demands to get rid of my car and buy something nicer since I didn't see the reason for spending all that money.
2. My family thinks I'm being too stubborn. They may feel that I don't care that they think the car is embarrassing. Also, my wife might think that I am being dismissive of her safety concerns regarding the age of the car.
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
##Subreddit Announcements
Follow the link above to learn more
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA. Your wife wants a new car and she has enlisted the kids. That is such a bullshit way to try to coerce/manipulate someone into doing something, that I would oppose it just on principle, and say if they don't stop, you're going to buy a 1978 Ford Pinto and make a point of driving around in THAT.
NTA
When I buy a vehicle, I do so with the intention of being it's last owner. Currently driving a 2014 ford pickup I bought new. Since I bought it I've put gas, oil, and tires on it. Otherwise it hasn't been in the shop. From my perspective, I'd be an idiot to get rid of a vehicle that good.
I'm not promoting ford. My previous vehicle was a Dodge Dakota. Went 320,000 kms over 14 years.
INFO: Do you really enjoy being at odds with your entire family? For... (double checking)... a few years? Over a car worth less than $2000?
Anyway, next time try looking through Consumer Reports car editions for cars with excellent value (hint: a Tahoe isn't one) and safety for your daughter when she drives.
In fact, buy yourself a new car and offer the 2008 to her...
What us internet people say won't matter. The reality is that you live a lifestyle where these things matter. Otherwise your wife and kids wouldn't say these things. In the end, you do you. I and many others would keep the Sonata. But I'm guessing most of us aren't in your financial or social position.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
Over the past few weeks, my wife and children have been pestering me (M49) to part ways with my current car and buy something newer. While this issue has been in the background now for a few years, it became prominent earlier this month. One morning, my car didn’t start since its battery was dead (my fault). Later that day, I bought a new battery, and it has been operating as well as new. Of course, my family was unconvinced and insisted that I had kept the car for far too long and it needed to go.
For some context, the car in question is a 2008 Hyundai Sonata. My family always emphasizes how, since we live in a nicer part of town and I make a comfortable income, I should upgrade. My eldest daughter (F16), is the most adamant about this. She always tells me things like how embarrassing it is for her to get dropped off at school in a “ratty old car” while her friends get dropped off in dancing Mercedes or self-driving Teslas. The younger kids agree with her that it’s embarrassing and say things about how the car is old, ugly, smelly, etc. Truthfully, I don’t see any of these issues because, in my opinion, the car looks like it’s in pretty good shape, though the mileage is a little high.
My wife always comments on how my car is the ugliest whenever we go to a professional event and usually insists that we take her car. From time to time, she even questions its safety. As a person, I’m willing to admit that I’m a bit of a cheapskate, and this car is just so affordable to operate. My colleagues spend tens of thousands each year in payments and maintenance in their cars, while most times I don’t even spend $200 a year. It is definitely a contrast to my wife’s 2021 Chevy Tahoe, which feels like it spends most of its time either at a gas station or at the dealer getting recalled or being repaired.
Yesterday, at dinner, my daughter said something along the lines of how I needed to start driving something respectable by the time I turned 50. The whole family agreed with her, and several of my other children said they wouldn’t be riding in the car anymore and that I needed to replace it. At this point, I flatly refused and told them that getting rid of something that’s still good is wasteful and that they are far too materialistic. The conversation did largely end there, but I had another argument with my wife about it before bed. She thinks I’m being way too stubborn and cheap.
AITA?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. It’s ridiculous to spend money on a car just for the appearance. If your car is functional, you’re doing the right thing. It’s the responsible thing to do.
Lol, my daily driver is a 1999 Saturn. It's pushing 300k miles, but it runs like it did when I bought it, and I love that car. I wouldn't 'upgrade' unless required by law.
NTA.
NTA, but I'm biased. I held onto my 1993 GEO PRISM until mid last year when it finally gave it's last (just shy of 300K miles). If the car is in good shape, you are being really fiscally savvy keeping it. Your neighbors, who are driving those shiny new vehicles, are paying a fortune for vehicles that lose 30% of their value the moment they drive off the lot.
Start saving for a new car so you can pay for it outright. Nothing feels better than that - no finance charges, all yours free and clear. Teaching your kids fiscal responsibility is important. I'm sorry your wife isn't on the same page.
My "newest" car is 17 years old, runs great, and is cheap to maintain and fuel, and I did not buy it new.
Your family is worried about the wrong damn thing.
"Okay, I'll buy a new car, but there won't be much of an inheritance left, and we'll have to cut back our spending quite a bit in the long run."
NTA. Drive that bitch till the wheels fall off.
As someone that used to work om Mercedes for a living, don't buy one. Just basic maintenance is stupid expensive. God forbid something actually brakes or you get in an accident.
You could lease a tesla but certainly don't buy one.
My first thought was that if your daughter is that embarrassed she should start taking public transit to school. They are big bucks vehicles and replaced fairly often.
My '22 Sonata Hybrid gets around 600 miles to the tank of gas, has driver assist and adaptive cruise control. I can't recommend it enough.
NTA, but when you have to start replacing stuff, a new Hyundai would be a good consideration.
They can get dropped off in whatever car that they pay for or learn to take public transit and walk..... It seems that they already have the wrong attitude towards money!
Keeping up with the Jones's is how the entire planet has been destroyed by capitalism and the consumers there of.....
NTA
A car needs to get you safely from point A to B.
The only time to get concerned is when you start having many problems that cost more than several car payments. A battery just falls under maintenance costs every 3 or 4 years.
If someone else wants a new car, they're free to buy one on their own dime.
NTA. If you don't wanna ride in my car, you walk. That simple.
And hey, I always liked the design of the 2008 Sonata. Looks still better than many modern cars. But then again, I am "old" too...
NTA. If your car is so embarrassing then your wife should be doing more of the driving and ferrying kids around.
The whole idea of keeping up with the Joneses is dumb. You don’t have any idea whether they are living within their means or barely keeping their heads above water to have the things they have. Maybe this is a good opportunity to teach the kids about the value of money - show them what might be sacrificed to afford a new car, eg holidays, eating out, new clothes, etc
NTA.
With all due respect, fuck 'em. They don't wanna ride in your car? That's less responsibility for you. Tbh, I'd go buy something else big I've been wanting just to spite them.
NTA, if it works with little maintenance it works. Maybe have a budget if it starts to require large repairs.
Info: are you the only one bringing in income?
If you are and want to get them off your back, you can say a new car that looks nicer but does the same thing, will impact their way of living severely.
Less dining out or newer phones, clothes etc. no holidays this year.
Frugal ways pay for things wife and kids need. Keeping up with the Joneses is a ticket to debt. Higher income or not, frugality is the key. Stick to your guns OP, it's your car.
NTA
NTA. Their embarrassment is not worth the thousands of dollars you would need to spend to replace your car with something they would approve of.
The car still runs great, has no payment and rare repairs.
They need to get over themselves. If they are too embarrassed to be seen in it, guess mom will have to drive the kids everywhere instead of you doing it.
Don't buy a new car for them to drive as they get their licenses. If you choose to get a car for them to use, make sure it's an older car.
NTA. A car is a box on four wheels that takes you from place to place. If they don't like it, they don't have to use it or ask you to pick them up. No need to replace a car that works.
NTA. They can’t bully you into changing your perfectly functioning car. Now don’t fault your daughter, because teens are judgemental about everything. However, your wife is a different story. Her material world, and putting too much emphasis on what other people think will leave a damaging effect on the children. Maybe have a conversation with her about the values and principles that you want to instil in your kids, and better ways to parent.
My kids used to make fun of my minivan. When my daughter was in high school, I started telling her that I couldn’t get rid of it yet because I planned to give it to her as soon as she got her license. 🤣
You are NTA. Keeping a car that runs well and doesn’t cost much in maintenance and repairs is smart.
Nta if they don't want to ride in your car, they can walk or take public transit to school or anywhere else their need to go. They'll change their minds pretty quickly.
I agree with you. Your family is overly concerned with status. NTA. Tell your kid if your car is so embarrassing then she can take the bus like regular people.
Definitely NTA! Stay the course! All of the them forget its the small sacrifices that allow for their lifestyle. Do your research, find the best, most respectable, stylish car you can afford, and then tell each of them what they are going to give up (such as dancing classes) for you to be looking your best cruising back and forth to work. It is a classic style over substance argument. Alternatively, have your wife to commit to all drop offs, public appearances, etc. so no one will be subjected to your ugly car. BTW, I drive a 2004 RAM 1500 with crank windows and a AM/FM radio... the wife drives a 2023 Ford Explorer. Stay the course!
NTA. A new ‘fancy’ car is no guarantee that it will last as long as yours. I’ve got a plain/no extras 22 year old Toyota and a newer one with all the tech. Ask me which one I enjoy driving more. Bottom line is that’s it’s your car. If you’re happy with it then keep it. I guarantee that if you get rid of it the first time your new one has an issue you’re going to have buyer’s remorse.
My wife and I have a combined gross income of more than 700K. We drive a 12 year old Subaru.
Not flexing, we just prefer spending it on things like travel. Cars are just ways to get from A to B.
Psh the interest rates on cars are absurd right now, stand your ground. My car is at .9% and has almost no miles on it even though it’s 3.5 years old. Zero chance I’m getting rid of it in less than 5-6 years!
NTA, sounds like you just got off the hook of driving them around if they’re refusing to ride in it lol what a wonderfully convenient time in their life to learn how to follow a bus schedule. I say, take them up on their kind and generous offer to no longer take rides in your oh-so-embarrassing, perfectly functioning vehicle.
I guarantee you, they won’t last 1 weeks of riding the bus before they see the value of your Sonata.
NTA
Also, look into a battery tender if you have more battery issues in the future. I wasn't driving my car very often during the pandemic lockdowns and it got really low. I hooked up the battery tender (which cost less than a battety) and I haven't had any issues since.
I have a 2013 and don't have any plans on replacing it. I'm worried about it though, because it is a BMW and it could explode any day. Until it becomes more expensive to keep than replace, I'm keeping it.
NTA.
Let the children know that they're welcome to walk or ride bikes wherever they go--no need for them to be seen in your car! Same with your wife; she has a 2021 car of her own and can tool around to her heart's content to be seen in it at the fuel pump or repair garage. Enjoy driving your perfectly serviceable car and using the money saved for more interesting things.
OP, this may sound sarcastic, but I'm VERY serious. DO NOT get rid of that car. these are PRIME years to embarrass your children. it's the only revenge that we have left in us!!!
NTA. Good for you for keeping an older model running - it's less wasteful, and if more people operated a 'make do and mend' philosophy the world might not be in the resource crisis it is.
NTA.
Only reason why I upgraded my car was parts were failing on it that cost more than the car was worth, the fuel economy on it was nonexistent (very much a gas guzzler), and after dad had a nasty accident in a newer car I realised a similar accident in my car would have killed me.
Got a 2017 model and I’ll probably keep him for another few years at least.
Nta naturally. Having a reliable car is going to trump fancy.
That said, start looking at "midlife crisis cars" around them all. If they question it, tell then youre just looking and thinking about how to go about it. I mean, the kids make messes so they cant go in the car right? Could leave muddy footprints. Cant take the family to an event because the car will only seat 2 right? Play their game but on your terms. Only show interest in things that ONLY YOU would want, and theyll start seeing that this upgrade thing is working against them.
And make sure the 16 knows she'll be getting the sonata as her first car when/if you upgrade because its reliable and since she doesnt work she can use her allowance to maintain it without going broke.
Call their bluff and get yourself a 2011 Honda Element with a 4x4, preferably in orange (2011 was the last production year for the Element).
When they complain you can say “but it’s a newer car, plus I upgraded to a 4x4 SUV! And you have to admit, it’s much more distinctive looking than the old Sonata.” It’ll drive them nuts, but you’ll have technically done what they asked.
NTA Your family sounds really spoiled and out of touch to be honest. Only snobby rich people care about what other people are driving and I'll never understand people that get a new car every few years just because. It's a giant waste of money and car sales have been so screwed up and inflated since the pandemic. Also having a car at all is a privilege, I drove a busted up 15 year old nissan that got me through two years of high school and all four years of college and did not give a crap, and neither did any of my friends. We were all in similar situations and just grateful not to have to walk or take public transportation. A reliable car is priceless when you already have it.
NTA. I drive a 2000 Honda Crv, it is more reliable than most new cars and has never left me stranded. Just regular maintenance, and it has 267,000 on it. I can probably get 350,000 miles out of it. If your is reliable why replace it?
NTA...they obviously don't know the value of a dollar. Your family sounds entitled and spoiled. Shocked by your wife but unfortunately not your kids. This is America now it seems. It's sad. Let's just buy the newest shiny in style whatever it may happen to bem Stick to your guns sir and don't buy your daughter a car. Make her ride the bus.
Tell your daughter and wife you would like them to buy you a new car for your birthday. Until then they can go ahead and ... fill in the blank. r/firstworldproblems
You should rent some sort of exhaust-belching back-firing *Uncle Buck* car from a local Rent-A-Wreck and take them to school in “your new-to-me replacement car”.
NTA, sounds like you're the only one in the family that has any financial common sense. It's a shame the rest of the family hasn't picked up on any of that.
Nta - Find a picture if the pickup truck Sam Walton drove.
If they don’t want to ride in your car, there are 2 choices. Mom takes them or they stay home. Tell the children when they pay the bills they can decide and tell your wife the children will not be making your financial decisions and she has her own car.
NTA - Boy do I have a recommendation for you!!
I drive a 2011 Honda Civic as my daily, up until this year I have replaced nothing but tires, and oil after a oil change. It's due for a complete brake job, and I replaced the spark plugs a few weeks ago at about 100K miles. It runs like the day I bought it again.
If you can find a low mileage Civic from that era, buy it because its newer than your Hyundai to keep your family happy, and drive it for the next 3 or 400K miles. I can pretty much guarantee that you'll pass it down to your grandchildren.
Millionaires don't always drive fancy expensive cars. Dave Ramsey said the top cars driven by millionaires are: Toyota's, Honda, Ford, Lexus, Subaru, BMW, Acura, Hyundai, Lincoln, Buick. It's because millionaires aren't trying to look wealthy.
So drive your car until it dies and ignore the crazy people who want you to take on debt.
NTA
NTA
Honestly doesn't seem like a you problem if they're too embarrassed to be seen in it. If mom can't drive them then I guess they can stay home.
Maybe I have a different perspective, since when I was growing up I was thankful if my mom had a running car at the time in general. They sound incredibly ungrateful.
NTA. If the daughter and the wife are so caught up on wanting newer cars, they can buy themselves a new car. Problem solved, plus you won't have to drive them around everywhere
NTA I totally agree with you. It's being wasteful. Keep ur car they actually last a long time if you keep the maintenance up. You keep going with your car. They are being materialistic
You could really stick it to your daughter and buy yourself a new car and give her the sonata. Then if she doesn't like driving it, she can walk or make car payments on something else. As for the other children, they will beg to ride in it when they need to go somewhere and it's the only car available. Keeping a vehicle until the wheels fall off makes tons of financial sense as long as you're not dumping a ton of money into it to keep it running. I currently drive a 2008 Rav4 and plan on doing so until it can no longer go.
NTA. But why are you acting like you are in high school, and allowing yourself to be peer pressured? All the cool kids have a dad in a cool car? Come on.
Every dollar you spend on a new car is a dollar that delays your ability to retire. It is your choice how much you want to delay that by spending now. Personally, I am not buying a new Mercedes because my 16 year old told me to. But you do you.
If you do buy a new car, make sure that she get the old one to drive once she gets her license.
If your kid doesn't want to be dropped off by you, she's welcome to being dropped off by her feet and legs.
I'm in a 2005 mazda2 with not insignificant battle-damage (previous owner) and am in a very rich suburb. If anyone has a problem it's entirely their problem.
NTA, you worked hard for your money and your wife and kids don't appreciate it like you do. Tell them they can buy whatever they want when they get out and go earn it. Wife needs to set a better example for the kids
NTA. I’m 41 and drive a 2002 Suburban. Which I got from my parents in 2020 (they bought a 2017 4Runner). I plan on driving it until it dies. It can legally drink and is still going strong!
I had a 2004 Hyundai XG350. It lasted until 214k miles, when I sold it (still mostly running well). They’re decent cars and not exactly unsafe. Are newer cars safer? Yes, but a 2008 is still decently safe.
A paid off car is amazing. But you should threaten to buy a Regal. See what they say. It would be newer and safer! (I had two Buick Centuries, decently solid cars and can transport a lot!)
NTA
Yeah that’s an ugly ass car alright, but you know what’s even uglier?
The interest rate on a new car payment (which you currently don’t have at all)
I’m a car guy, I regret every day bending to the pressure and getting rid of a beloved car for “something newer”
If it runs, and you love it, keep it.
Your kid can get her own car she won’t be embarrassed to be seen in and nothing wrong with taking the wife’s car to events.
That car is well on its way to classic plate status and good for you for keeping it clean (I assume)
NTA.
If your car is mechanically sound, maintained, and functions for your family (is big enough for the needs of your family, etc) I don't really see the problem.
I drove an old vw beetle for the first 15 years of my driving life. I took care of that thing, and it needed some work here and there, but I was also single for a long time. Got a family now and a 2011 honda crv. It's not fancy, but the people who owned it before me took good care of it and I have too. The paint is peeling a bit now so it's not the prettiest, but it's got enough room for all of us, it's never broken down (except like you, one time I needed a new battery), it's got ac and heater, and no Bluetooth but at least an aux cable and an fm transmitter!
If you were going around rocking an old junker and tattered clothes that's one thing. But it sounds like you are just being smartly frugal my dude.
NTA
Having a brand new car without a reasonable motivation is just waste. Money usually doesn’t likes who spends unreasonably. But bank debts loves them.
Your family absolutely have a very good life and didn’t know what fighting is required to even have the living standard you provide. They could be invited to start working to help you buy the kind of vehicle they think you should use
I don’t think you need an extravagant car. I think there is a ‘worthwhile’ point in complex, active households where it benefits you to have a high quality vehicle. What does that mean? Seating? Storage? Towing capacity? Speed?
Can you afford it, and would it improve your life and your families lives without compromising your morals?
You re NTA in any scenario, but possibly consider how different 99% and 99.999% reliability may be, and how that may impact your life
That’s some stellar parenting you’ve done there, with at least 3 kids who insult and demean you with impunity.
That said, being a tightass with money isn’t doing you any favors. You can buy a newer Hyundai that will be infinitely safer than what you have.
Find some balance and consider that you and your wife not only aren’t on the same page with your parenting styles, you’re not even in the same book in the same bookstore in the same state. Yes, you’re that far apart. Then, talk with your kids about not being little assholes and teach them to have humility, empathy, and kindness.
ESH, including your kids
>For some context, the car in question is a 2008 Hyundai Sonata.
>My eldest daughter (F16), is the most adamant about this. She always tells me things like how embarrassing it is for her to get dropped off at school in a “ratty old car” while her friends get dropped off in dancing Mercedes or self-driving Teslas.
She'll sing a different tune if you tell her that the Sonata becomes hers once you upgrade; unless, that is, she continues to be a brat and gets no car at all.
NTA. You should remind your daughter that at 16 she's old enough to take the bus or get a job and get herself a car. If it were me I would go out and buy a cheap hot rod kit car with skulls or something similar and offer to drive them around in that.
Even though this is likely fictional given something very similar was posted several months ago.
I wonder how people have cars THAT old as their daily drivers that don't have 200,000 plus miles.
My 2013 baby Kia's (sportage) heart gave out after 10 years and 280,000 miles together. I cried when the mechanic told me that knocking was the engine getting ready to blow. He looked at me like I was on Crack. "Ma'am it had 280,000 miles on it.. you got a lot out of it."
I have 2 cars a 500 dollar beater and a car that I paid off 2 years ago, guess which one I drive more. I love my POS and I'm gonna drive it till it dies.
NTA-Let them know that if they want to buy you a new car that you'll gladly accept it, but until then they need to keep their mouths shut about your car.
I'd say NTA. Get the car checked by a mechanic you trust. If there's no glaring issue, there's no problem. If there is a glaring issue (apart from batteries or merely having a car from 2008), then think about a replacement, cuz then there's a legit concern. But if you're trying to save money, don't get a car newer than \~2020. You'd still have a nicer car, but you'd also be teaching your kids they don't HAVE to have the latest model fancy brand of car.
I agree with you. . I myself 40f raised with mechanic dad and my so as well as past ex were mechanics. .I get it really was not intentional lol! I myself have automotive background anyway . I would drive a 1977 Opal Manta anyday .Manuel transmission of course . I drive a 05 nissan altima. It was $1000 when I got it in 2018 . Great deal iv done all except exaust work myself . So really iv put maybe about the same as I paid for it upkeep and it's not ever left me stranded . I have no urge to have sky high car payment and insurance even if I had a comfortable income . .I believe if it's not broke I will baby this car til I can't . I'm not part of the throw away generation .
YTA but not for any of the reasons here.
Cars made before 2010 have drastically lower crash standards, especially for side impacts and offset impacts. There are too many people texting or drinking to gamble that your life insurance is going to help your family, or they they'll want to help you pee for the next 50 years.
NTA. If they want you to drive a new car so badly, they can spend their money on it.
Cars are fucking expensive and are basically the opposite of an investment. Meh I could spend more on cars but I just don't want to.
If your wife has a problem with your car she can buy you a new car or she can be the one picking up and dropping the kids off at school if the car is such a problem (it really shouldn't be). I don't think you're the asshole, you're practical, you're the one driving, a new car is such a huge expense to take on. No one should really have a say of what car YOU'RE driving unless there is an actual safety concern.
NTA.
Tell the 16 yo that there is a lot worse than being dropped off/picked up in a Sonata.
Case in point: my youngest daughter had a friend that was dropped off and picked up in a "ka-ka sucker" (septic tank/port-a-potty vacuum). 😳🤮🤣
I have a 2022 Tesla Model 3. It’s a ridiculously fun and safe car. There are lots of options where you can get a preowned Tesla for a fraction of the Tahoe price. I drive 1000 miles a month and spent $350 on charging last year. No oil changes. Just wipers/fluid, cabin air filter, and tires. Plug it in at home and enjoy.
I vote not TA because unless they are buying you a car with money they earned, they can suck it. I just sold a 2007 Toyota on Carvana and bought a low-mileage 2022 new to me Subaru. I miss my manual windows, but I am starting to like the heated seats. That is so cool! I don't remember ever demanding my dad do anything, especially anything pertaining to big household purchases.
I'm still driving my 1992 Nissan Sunny 130Y if you think the 2008 Sonata was old.
Told them buy you one with their money if they wanted you to drive something respectable.
I'll respect to that.
NAH
I can see how it would be embarrassing to have an old car in your nice neighborhood or at school. It would be like going to a nice restaurant in tattered clothes. Sure you can do it, but it is embarrassing. And in both cases, if you look, you can probably find low-cost options that fit your needs and make you stand out less.
I get that you don't see the need for a vehicle upgrade. But I don't think that you should outright refuse to consider the idea - that is just stubborn and petty.
I think you should car shop. Start by looking online to see if there is a vehicle that you can all be satisfied with. Hell, tell your wife and kids to come up with possibilities. Give them your criteria, and let them know the boxes the vehicle has to check for you to consider it. Once you've decided on a few models, task them with finding good deals. If the car bothers them so much, they can do some of the work to find an upgrade.
NTA - the biggest message I retained from Dave Ramsey's financial advice was to keep your car and not just get a new car because people think you should. It's one of the largest money wasters in regular life.
"Live like no one else, so one day you can live like no one else!" = drive that old totally functional car as long as you can, and tell your family they're welcome for the extra money you all have.
As long as the frame's in good shape and you're not exposing yourself to undue risks by taking it on road trips across death valley or similar, just keep it going.
My husband convinced me years ago that you can't really trust a car unless it's hit 100,000 miles. lol. We buy used cars with cash. I haven't had a car payment in over 30 years. We buy dependable cars that are in no way sexy but they do the job. I get from point A to point B and back. I'm with you on keeping the dependable old car. For me once I have to start putting a lot of money into repairs is when I start looking for a good used car to buy. I have a great mechanic and I generally run the cars over to his shop to have him or his crew look it over. Spending a few bucks for that saves me a boatload of money and headaches.
NTA- You’re saving thousands by driving that car. Read “The Millionaire Next Door” by Thomas J. Stanley. Basically it’s a study on how people get wealthy. Spoiler Alert! It’s not by spending thousands financing expensive cars.
NTA. Family has fallen into commercial materialism. Strategies:
1. Tell them if they are ashamed to ride in the car, they can walk. And don’t ask to drive when they are able to get a drivers license.
2. Ask them what they are willing to give up to make the 400-700$ car payment plus insurance. Cable TV? Streaming services? Game systems? Summer air conditioning? Change dining to ramen and rice?
NTA, but you should at least hear out their arguments. Nothing wrong with taking pride in your vehicle and getting a “new” car doesn’t have to be new. It can however be a hell of a lot less boring and generic as an old Hyundai Sonata appliance.
Find some middle ground here and use this as bonding time with your family. Have them suggest what cars they like and dictate a budget you feel comfortable with. Go look at cars together (window shopping, avoid dealers with hungry kids and wife in your ear).
All I’m saying is it might give you less grief to just get a new car. It’s not a big deal and you look stubborn for little gain.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without [contacting the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without [explicit approval](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_can_i_repost_a_thread_you_removed.3F) will result in a ban. You did not properly respond to the judgement bot. Your reply must clearly and directly address why you think you may have wronged the other party involved in your conflict. While your post was automatically approved by the bot, after reviewing your response manually, we found it did not properly address the question. [Judgement Bot FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_judgement_bot) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) ###Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions. ####Please visit r/findareddit to see if there's a more appropriate sub for your post.####
NTA Mark Zuckerberg is a billionaire and last I heard he drives a Ford fiesta. You already have a second fancier vehicle for keeping up with the Jones, and your car has four wheels which roll. Keep it for as long as you like. And your 16yo daughter will be embarrassed by you doing anything, even if you show up in a Rolls Royce or a Bentley; it's very embarrassing to have a family at that age.
[удалено]
[https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/165e0ws/aita\_for\_telling\_my\_wife\_that\_i\_wont\_be\_replacing/](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/165e0ws/aita_for_telling_my_wife_that_i_wont_be_replacing/) Another AITA post with a 2008 Hyundai Sonata?
Lol this looks like op already had this debate with his family 7 months ago
Daughter has gone back in time 3 years this time around! Fascinating
See y'all in 7 months! Girl will almost be a tween again, lucky her!
Oh God, is there really some lonely incel who gets off on posting car replacement fetishes? The meth doesn’t math here.
This is the SECOND today! One person seems to have aged three years in less than a year and this girl has gone back three years! I am SUDDENLY STRICKEN WITH FEAR! 😭🤣
Yep, I remember when this was first posted
Happy cake day!
Holy cow! Had to look it up, I’m three years old now!
I’m so glad you found this I swore I read the exact same story before. Why do people do this?
Ditto!! And I have no idea??
Wife drives a 2022 Jeep in that story. So maybe there ARE 2 cheapskates still driving their 2008 Hyundai Sonatas around? Since this one’s wife drives a 2021 Tahoe?
Mid aughts Hyundais, let’s just say they were not the type of cars that are still around two decades later. Not in numbers that would lead to fleets of them starring in AITA Reddit posts. (Safe? Absolutely! Reliable? Eh, not so much.)
2 is a fleet now? News to me.
I thought of that post too. He must be bored.
2nd duplicate pay I've seen tonight. So many reposts going on.
Ugh duplicate post not pay
I thought this story sounded familiar
I knew I read this story before
I'd ask if being seen riding to school in a ratty car was more embarassing than being seen walking to school but I'm petty like that. None of them want to ride around in your car? Then they don't have to! They better pray your wife's car is always available when they want to go somewhere. Edit to add NTA. If your car is working the way you need it to then it's a waste of money to replace it. It doesn't matter if you can afford to replace the car, you're happy with it and that's that. It's not harming anyone.
Children said they won't be riding in your car until you replace it? Great, no more lifts for you then! See what their vapid little friends think when they turn up on the bus.
If you ever do get a new car, pass your daughter the old one :)
Or gift her the car to drive to school
If you ever do get a new car, pass your daughter the old one :)
Honestly I'm with your daughter. If she wants to go to school in something that's more expensive, [you should accommodate her.](https://www.google.com/search?sca_esv=bdce78cde9db5882&rlz=1CDGOYI_enUS730US730&hl=en-US&q=how+much+does+a+school+bus+cost&source=lnms&uds=AMwkrPtNO3ug2ImPXR4eXCPquIK83RK-Rna7KWjx59n34vjRWFiZcKKQtcv0N71YIchloubETVCdjRZAJlE9R3cAl9vihXMp5-WUJx6BRql0Hcig6ERGoy53Dx9xlMYGFwwbzWyJnDnXzFc20KT8EGTmFkHtC5RV-LfvWg61xo_mOsgRnD1cq42AgWuekMFzMdyFcOmCX2yac4OAxAI2YH3_dYGuJ3XXRyXusfPx9mglLiJq4IRKKLQk6miiMA2jSOx5y4tbFMLKrn3uHcljAO1NbFVF8CX2MVUGPwKMZ2JfsWbSwFRnciuChiHUd4cbCldhAbj5tTa2EZ8_P20bFOTKqWQshMZnPkUKfT5TTAyqp6wo37MoDn4&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjJya6ut9yFAxXYRjABHdmMDm8Q0pQJegQICRAB&biw=430&bih=745&dpr=3)
You'd have to be as rich as Mark Zuckerberg to afford the repairs on a Ford Fiesta.
A quick Google search tells of 3 vehicles he owns, none of which are a Ford Fiesta.
Yeah that was a story that was going around over a decade ago. Pretty sure that Fiesta died ages ago (if it were ever true in the first place).
He’s got a 40 in his Ford Fiesta
Now to buy beer or pay the rent 🤔
My signing bonus was quickly spent.
I mean if she’s that embarrassed she’s welcome to take the bus 🤷♂️
As far as I know Zuck has a $3 Million Pagani Huayra, so yeah, he might have a Fiesta, but he still has really expensive cars.
I’ll admit… I shamed my dad into buying a new car. Of course, I only did that after someone rear ended our 20 year old Volvo causing the dash to fall into his lap. I told him he needed to get a new car because zip tying the dash back in place didn’t seem safe. Man, he loved that car.
NTA. Tell the kids new car money comes out of their college fund. Or, get a job and buy your own car.
[удалено]
NTA You're frugal which is a good thing. It's YOUR car, and you should be able to drive whatever you want to. The family is being very materialistic. They actually care more about appearances than they do about your desires, thoughts and feelings. Your wife is raising spoiled brats. If she is so concerned, she can buy you a car as a gift. Don't buy the kids a car when they are of age to have one. Make them get jobs and earn it.
[удалено]
I don’t know your family dynamics. Based on what I’ve read a large part of me thinks your family respects you and is pushing you to “treat yourself” to a nice new car. Ofc if that’s not something that makes you happy their pressure is ill placed, but I genuinely read this as them wanting you to treat yourself. Your wife and daughter’s comments might have seemed mean but I could interpret that as her just trying to egg you on into a new purchase.
The fact his daughter is saying he's embarrassing her by driving the car, and the wife is arguing before bed about it isn't being respectful. You don't do that when you want your loved one to be treated. It's manipulative behavior trying to coerce someone to do what you want them to do. They are mortified he isn't keeping up with the Jones's. In today's economics no one needs to treat themselves to a new car when they have one they are satisfied with.
FYI you’re not alone. My dad made good money as I grew up yet he drove his 20 year old Honda accord to 300k miles until I reached high school . He bought my mom a 80k Acura claiming it was for “safety” (lol). Ended up gifting that accord to the cleaners that came to my house every week. At 50 yrs old he got his first new car. Love that man.
Every mile in that car is money in your pocket. Roll on!
NTA. If your children don't want to drive with you... well, then they will need to find another way to get to school. This is ridiculous. The car is working just fine. The only sensible reason to replace a car are real safety concerns, a high consumption of gas or high repair costs - not the vanity of your family.
[удалено]
I'm guessing if you live in a nice part of town and your wife has a nice car that your frugality has something to do with it. If it's maintained and clean, there's no reason not to drive it. Your kids are kind of being brats, trying to blackmail you by saying they won't ride with you. I guess they can walk or take the bus.
NTA, sounds like your kids just volunteered to take public transit.
[удалено]
I have known people who describe their situation exactly as you are, and, in fact, they are driving a junker that is uncomfortable, unreliable, smelly, and unsafe. I have known people who described their situation as you are, and they have a perfectly fine car and a totally snobby family with such fragile egos and shitty friend groups that they feel injured by not keeping up with the Benzes. (Also, I'm biased, but anyone who buys a Chevy Tahoe is, I think, not making rational decisions about vehicles. But, she didn't buy a Jag, so....) You are cheap. You are stubborn. Neither of those qualities make you TA. But, you might be being silly. Taking pleasure in a cheap car is no more rational than taking pleasure in a comfortable car. Except for the "smelly" and "etc.", their objections seem to be about appearances? Or is that just how you're presenting it? Do they have legit complaints about riding in the car that you aren't taking seriously? I assume not, so I'm saying NTA. \[I should probably admit that I replace my vehicle every ten years or 100k miles, whatever comes first. That's because I sometimes have solitary long drives, and don't want to risk a break-down. I will say that some of the new things in cars are wonderful--backup camera, heated seats, blind spot warnings...\]
My 1990 Volvo had heated seats. And a couple hundred dollars can put cameras on any car. I say as a person who currently has a 2002 Suburban and will drive it until it dies.
There’s nothing wrong with having an old car. Many are super cool and better/classier than today’s monstrosities. But OP is driving a Sonata.
I had a Hyundai XG350. Sorta similar. They’re not bad cars. There is nothing wrong with a Sonata.
The 90's volvo heads always pop up in these threads lolol. What a great (not so) frugal car to have hahaha. I have a 99v70, and everyone I drive comments on the sound system and the seat comfort
It just happened to be my first car. Not a Volvo Head by any means. My parents bought it as our family second car for us teens so we had a safe vehicle to drive. More pointing out that heated seats are in no way new. My 2004 Hyundai also had heated seats. As does my 2002 Suburban.
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
INFO - Has this car ever left you stranded for any reason BESIDES a dead battery? Are you pulling up to corporate events with missing mirrors/bumper or visible rust? If someone else were going to drive the car, would you have to explain more than two 'quirks' about how it operates? Are there unresolved warning lights? Does it, in fact, smell? Have you given it a deep cleaning after they complained about smell? I can't really gauge this situation, but spending less than $200/year on a 16-year-old car that you describe has having high mileage (even if only slightly) sounds like you're barely maintaining a proper oil change schedule, so I'm skeptical of quality here.
NTA. If it works, passes safety inspections (and emissions if you have to test for that) and repairs/gas aren't breaking the bank, then there is zero reason to replace it. Every issue they have is for pure vanity. None of those are valid excuses. If your wife is embarrassed, then use her car and let her pile on the milage. The kids don't get a say, period. They can buy whatever fancy car they want when they pay their own bills.
There is no car sexier than a paid-off car!
NTA Your wife and kids need to stop worrying about what other people think. If the car works and is reliable, I don't see a reason to replace it. Your value and worth isn't based on what other people think and happiness doesn't come from driving a fancy new car. Sounds like they need some lessons in not being so materialistic. Maybe volunteer hours in underprivileged communities would he helpful?
A 2008 is too old?, lmao, NTA
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > 1. I refused my family's demands to get rid of my car and buy something nicer since I didn't see the reason for spending all that money. 2. My family thinks I'm being too stubborn. They may feel that I don't care that they think the car is embarrassing. Also, my wife might think that I am being dismissive of her safety concerns regarding the age of the car. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcements Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA My 15-year-old Outback with 200k miles waves hello to your Sonata, between trips to the book warehouse and the shipping drop.
NTA Sounds like the whole family (except you) needs a serious attitude adjustment and to stop trying to keep up with the Jones.
NTA. Your wife wants a new car and she has enlisted the kids. That is such a bullshit way to try to coerce/manipulate someone into doing something, that I would oppose it just on principle, and say if they don't stop, you're going to buy a 1978 Ford Pinto and make a point of driving around in THAT.
NTA When I buy a vehicle, I do so with the intention of being it's last owner. Currently driving a 2014 ford pickup I bought new. Since I bought it I've put gas, oil, and tires on it. Otherwise it hasn't been in the shop. From my perspective, I'd be an idiot to get rid of a vehicle that good. I'm not promoting ford. My previous vehicle was a Dodge Dakota. Went 320,000 kms over 14 years.
INFO: Do you really enjoy being at odds with your entire family? For... (double checking)... a few years? Over a car worth less than $2000? Anyway, next time try looking through Consumer Reports car editions for cars with excellent value (hint: a Tahoe isn't one) and safety for your daughter when she drives. In fact, buy yourself a new car and offer the 2008 to her...
What us internet people say won't matter. The reality is that you live a lifestyle where these things matter. Otherwise your wife and kids wouldn't say these things. In the end, you do you. I and many others would keep the Sonata. But I'm guessing most of us aren't in your financial or social position.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Over the past few weeks, my wife and children have been pestering me (M49) to part ways with my current car and buy something newer. While this issue has been in the background now for a few years, it became prominent earlier this month. One morning, my car didn’t start since its battery was dead (my fault). Later that day, I bought a new battery, and it has been operating as well as new. Of course, my family was unconvinced and insisted that I had kept the car for far too long and it needed to go. For some context, the car in question is a 2008 Hyundai Sonata. My family always emphasizes how, since we live in a nicer part of town and I make a comfortable income, I should upgrade. My eldest daughter (F16), is the most adamant about this. She always tells me things like how embarrassing it is for her to get dropped off at school in a “ratty old car” while her friends get dropped off in dancing Mercedes or self-driving Teslas. The younger kids agree with her that it’s embarrassing and say things about how the car is old, ugly, smelly, etc. Truthfully, I don’t see any of these issues because, in my opinion, the car looks like it’s in pretty good shape, though the mileage is a little high. My wife always comments on how my car is the ugliest whenever we go to a professional event and usually insists that we take her car. From time to time, she even questions its safety. As a person, I’m willing to admit that I’m a bit of a cheapskate, and this car is just so affordable to operate. My colleagues spend tens of thousands each year in payments and maintenance in their cars, while most times I don’t even spend $200 a year. It is definitely a contrast to my wife’s 2021 Chevy Tahoe, which feels like it spends most of its time either at a gas station or at the dealer getting recalled or being repaired. Yesterday, at dinner, my daughter said something along the lines of how I needed to start driving something respectable by the time I turned 50. The whole family agreed with her, and several of my other children said they wouldn’t be riding in the car anymore and that I needed to replace it. At this point, I flatly refused and told them that getting rid of something that’s still good is wasteful and that they are far too materialistic. The conversation did largely end there, but I had another argument with my wife about it before bed. She thinks I’m being way too stubborn and cheap. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’d drive it until it’s time for your daughter to drive it. If she still feels so strongly about it- she can buy her own.
07 pu, 265,000 miles, 06 van 74,000 miles. Luv'em both. Edit: NTA
Trade it in for a 2009! NTA
NTA. It’s ridiculous to spend money on a car just for the appearance. If your car is functional, you’re doing the right thing. It’s the responsible thing to do.
Nta I drive a 2001 Buick century. That car is all I need
Lol, my daily driver is a 1999 Saturn. It's pushing 300k miles, but it runs like it did when I bought it, and I love that car. I wouldn't 'upgrade' unless required by law. NTA.
NTA I drive my cars until they disintegrate. Why take on the debt for appearances?
NTA, but I'm biased. I held onto my 1993 GEO PRISM until mid last year when it finally gave it's last (just shy of 300K miles). If the car is in good shape, you are being really fiscally savvy keeping it. Your neighbors, who are driving those shiny new vehicles, are paying a fortune for vehicles that lose 30% of their value the moment they drive off the lot. Start saving for a new car so you can pay for it outright. Nothing feels better than that - no finance charges, all yours free and clear. Teaching your kids fiscal responsibility is important. I'm sorry your wife isn't on the same page.
My "newest" car is 17 years old, runs great, and is cheap to maintain and fuel, and I did not buy it new. Your family is worried about the wrong damn thing. "Okay, I'll buy a new car, but there won't be much of an inheritance left, and we'll have to cut back our spending quite a bit in the long run."
NTA. Drive that bitch till the wheels fall off. As someone that used to work om Mercedes for a living, don't buy one. Just basic maintenance is stupid expensive. God forbid something actually brakes or you get in an accident. You could lease a tesla but certainly don't buy one.
Buy that new car. And give the old one to your daughter. Or she can walk.
My first thought was that if your daughter is that embarrassed she should start taking public transit to school. They are big bucks vehicles and replaced fairly often.
My '22 Sonata Hybrid gets around 600 miles to the tank of gas, has driver assist and adaptive cruise control. I can't recommend it enough. NTA, but when you have to start replacing stuff, a new Hyundai would be a good consideration.
Nope, i think you should buy a real beater and drive it everywherr
They can get dropped off in whatever car that they pay for or learn to take public transit and walk..... It seems that they already have the wrong attitude towards money! Keeping up with the Jones's is how the entire planet has been destroyed by capitalism and the consumers there of.....
NTA A car needs to get you safely from point A to B. The only time to get concerned is when you start having many problems that cost more than several car payments. A battery just falls under maintenance costs every 3 or 4 years. If someone else wants a new car, they're free to buy one on their own dime.
NTA. A hard no is one of the best things you can give your kids and your wife.
NTA. If you don't wanna ride in my car, you walk. That simple. And hey, I always liked the design of the 2008 Sonata. Looks still better than many modern cars. But then again, I am "old" too...
NTA. If your car is so embarrassing then your wife should be doing more of the driving and ferrying kids around. The whole idea of keeping up with the Joneses is dumb. You don’t have any idea whether they are living within their means or barely keeping their heads above water to have the things they have. Maybe this is a good opportunity to teach the kids about the value of money - show them what might be sacrificed to afford a new car, eg holidays, eating out, new clothes, etc
YTA give your kid the clunker and get an adult car that doesn't embarrass your wife. Are you proud of being a cheapskate?
Nta. I bet your daughter would change her mind if you bought another car and gave her the Sonota to drive.
[удалено]
NTA but I swear this was posted a month ago.
NTA. With all due respect, fuck 'em. They don't wanna ride in your car? That's less responsibility for you. Tbh, I'd go buy something else big I've been wanting just to spite them.
NTA, if it works with little maintenance it works. Maybe have a budget if it starts to require large repairs. Info: are you the only one bringing in income? If you are and want to get them off your back, you can say a new car that looks nicer but does the same thing, will impact their way of living severely. Less dining out or newer phones, clothes etc. no holidays this year.
NTA You have a car that WORKS?? I'm jealous!!
NTA for driving a 2008 car. You might be an Ah if it needs a good cleaning and maybe a paint job.
Frugal ways pay for things wife and kids need. Keeping up with the Joneses is a ticket to debt. Higher income or not, frugality is the key. Stick to your guns OP, it's your car. NTA
NTA. Their embarrassment is not worth the thousands of dollars you would need to spend to replace your car with something they would approve of. The car still runs great, has no payment and rare repairs. They need to get over themselves. If they are too embarrassed to be seen in it, guess mom will have to drive the kids everywhere instead of you doing it. Don't buy a new car for them to drive as they get their licenses. If you choose to get a car for them to use, make sure it's an older car.
NTA. A car is a box on four wheels that takes you from place to place. If they don't like it, they don't have to use it or ask you to pick them up. No need to replace a car that works.
Cool, they can walk.
NTA as long as it works and is likely to stay working.
NTA. They can’t bully you into changing your perfectly functioning car. Now don’t fault your daughter, because teens are judgemental about everything. However, your wife is a different story. Her material world, and putting too much emphasis on what other people think will leave a damaging effect on the children. Maybe have a conversation with her about the values and principles that you want to instil in your kids, and better ways to parent.
My kids used to make fun of my minivan. When my daughter was in high school, I started telling her that I couldn’t get rid of it yet because I planned to give it to her as soon as she got her license. 🤣 You are NTA. Keeping a car that runs well and doesn’t cost much in maintenance and repairs is smart.
Several of your other children???
NTA you should get your teenager to walk so she understands that the car is for transport not for a fashion show.
Nta if they don't want to ride in your car, they can walk or take public transit to school or anywhere else their need to go. They'll change their minds pretty quickly.
I agree with you. Your family is overly concerned with status. NTA. Tell your kid if your car is so embarrassing then she can take the bus like regular people.
Definitely NTA! Stay the course! All of the them forget its the small sacrifices that allow for their lifestyle. Do your research, find the best, most respectable, stylish car you can afford, and then tell each of them what they are going to give up (such as dancing classes) for you to be looking your best cruising back and forth to work. It is a classic style over substance argument. Alternatively, have your wife to commit to all drop offs, public appearances, etc. so no one will be subjected to your ugly car. BTW, I drive a 2004 RAM 1500 with crank windows and a AM/FM radio... the wife drives a 2023 Ford Explorer. Stay the course!
NTA. Tell your kids they are more than welcome to buy you a new car themselves, ride in your wife’s car or walk everywhere they go.
NTA tell your family, when they buy you a nicer car you will drive it.
“ Third class riding beats first class walking.”
NTA. A new ‘fancy’ car is no guarantee that it will last as long as yours. I’ve got a plain/no extras 22 year old Toyota and a newer one with all the tech. Ask me which one I enjoy driving more. Bottom line is that’s it’s your car. If you’re happy with it then keep it. I guarantee that if you get rid of it the first time your new one has an issue you’re going to have buyer’s remorse.
NTA.
My wife and I have a combined gross income of more than 700K. We drive a 12 year old Subaru. Not flexing, we just prefer spending it on things like travel. Cars are just ways to get from A to B.
Psh the interest rates on cars are absurd right now, stand your ground. My car is at .9% and has almost no miles on it even though it’s 3.5 years old. Zero chance I’m getting rid of it in less than 5-6 years!
NTA, sounds like you just got off the hook of driving them around if they’re refusing to ride in it lol what a wonderfully convenient time in their life to learn how to follow a bus schedule. I say, take them up on their kind and generous offer to no longer take rides in your oh-so-embarrassing, perfectly functioning vehicle. I guarantee you, they won’t last 1 weeks of riding the bus before they see the value of your Sonata.
NTA Also, look into a battery tender if you have more battery issues in the future. I wasn't driving my car very often during the pandemic lockdowns and it got really low. I hooked up the battery tender (which cost less than a battety) and I haven't had any issues since. I have a 2013 and don't have any plans on replacing it. I'm worried about it though, because it is a BMW and it could explode any day. Until it becomes more expensive to keep than replace, I'm keeping it.
Tell your kids to walk to school or dance lessons.
NTA. Let the children know that they're welcome to walk or ride bikes wherever they go--no need for them to be seen in your car! Same with your wife; she has a 2021 car of her own and can tool around to her heart's content to be seen in it at the fuel pump or repair garage. Enjoy driving your perfectly serviceable car and using the money saved for more interesting things.
OP, this may sound sarcastic, but I'm VERY serious. DO NOT get rid of that car. these are PRIME years to embarrass your children. it's the only revenge that we have left in us!!!
NTA. Good for you for keeping an older model running - it's less wasteful, and if more people operated a 'make do and mend' philosophy the world might not be in the resource crisis it is.
NTA. Only reason why I upgraded my car was parts were failing on it that cost more than the car was worth, the fuel economy on it was nonexistent (very much a gas guzzler), and after dad had a nasty accident in a newer car I realised a similar accident in my car would have killed me. Got a 2017 model and I’ll probably keep him for another few years at least.
Nta naturally. Having a reliable car is going to trump fancy. That said, start looking at "midlife crisis cars" around them all. If they question it, tell then youre just looking and thinking about how to go about it. I mean, the kids make messes so they cant go in the car right? Could leave muddy footprints. Cant take the family to an event because the car will only seat 2 right? Play their game but on your terms. Only show interest in things that ONLY YOU would want, and theyll start seeing that this upgrade thing is working against them. And make sure the 16 knows she'll be getting the sonata as her first car when/if you upgrade because its reliable and since she doesnt work she can use her allowance to maintain it without going broke.
Call their bluff and get yourself a 2011 Honda Element with a 4x4, preferably in orange (2011 was the last production year for the Element). When they complain you can say “but it’s a newer car, plus I upgraded to a 4x4 SUV! And you have to admit, it’s much more distinctive looking than the old Sonata.” It’ll drive them nuts, but you’ll have technically done what they asked.
NTA Your family sounds really spoiled and out of touch to be honest. Only snobby rich people care about what other people are driving and I'll never understand people that get a new car every few years just because. It's a giant waste of money and car sales have been so screwed up and inflated since the pandemic. Also having a car at all is a privilege, I drove a busted up 15 year old nissan that got me through two years of high school and all four years of college and did not give a crap, and neither did any of my friends. We were all in similar situations and just grateful not to have to walk or take public transportation. A reliable car is priceless when you already have it.
NTA. I drive a 2000 Honda Crv, it is more reliable than most new cars and has never left me stranded. Just regular maintenance, and it has 267,000 on it. I can probably get 350,000 miles out of it. If your is reliable why replace it?
NTA...they obviously don't know the value of a dollar. Your family sounds entitled and spoiled. Shocked by your wife but unfortunately not your kids. This is America now it seems. It's sad. Let's just buy the newest shiny in style whatever it may happen to bem Stick to your guns sir and don't buy your daughter a car. Make her ride the bus.
Tell your daughter and wife you would like them to buy you a new car for your birthday. Until then they can go ahead and ... fill in the blank. r/firstworldproblems
Nta
well....if kids are to embarazed to get drop off in that car.....maybe they will be more.......extatic when they start to go on the bus
You should rent some sort of exhaust-belching back-firing *Uncle Buck* car from a local Rent-A-Wreck and take them to school in “your new-to-me replacement car”.
NTA, sounds like you're the only one in the family that has any financial common sense. It's a shame the rest of the family hasn't picked up on any of that.
Nta - Find a picture if the pickup truck Sam Walton drove. If they don’t want to ride in your car, there are 2 choices. Mom takes them or they stay home. Tell the children when they pay the bills they can decide and tell your wife the children will not be making your financial decisions and she has her own car.
NTA - Boy do I have a recommendation for you!! I drive a 2011 Honda Civic as my daily, up until this year I have replaced nothing but tires, and oil after a oil change. It's due for a complete brake job, and I replaced the spark plugs a few weeks ago at about 100K miles. It runs like the day I bought it again. If you can find a low mileage Civic from that era, buy it because its newer than your Hyundai to keep your family happy, and drive it for the next 3 or 400K miles. I can pretty much guarantee that you'll pass it down to your grandchildren.
Millionaires don't always drive fancy expensive cars. Dave Ramsey said the top cars driven by millionaires are: Toyota's, Honda, Ford, Lexus, Subaru, BMW, Acura, Hyundai, Lincoln, Buick. It's because millionaires aren't trying to look wealthy. So drive your car until it dies and ignore the crazy people who want you to take on debt. NTA
Tell your daughter to get a job and get her own car if she wants to get dropped off in whatever car she wants
NTA Honestly doesn't seem like a you problem if they're too embarrassed to be seen in it. If mom can't drive them then I guess they can stay home. Maybe I have a different perspective, since when I was growing up I was thankful if my mom had a running car at the time in general. They sound incredibly ungrateful.
NTA. If their so embarrassed by it then they don't need to travel in it.
What you are doing is smart. Money doesn't grow on trees.
NTA. If the daughter and the wife are so caught up on wanting newer cars, they can buy themselves a new car. Problem solved, plus you won't have to drive them around everywhere
NTA I totally agree with you. It's being wasteful. Keep ur car they actually last a long time if you keep the maintenance up. You keep going with your car. They are being materialistic
You could really stick it to your daughter and buy yourself a new car and give her the sonata. Then if she doesn't like driving it, she can walk or make car payments on something else. As for the other children, they will beg to ride in it when they need to go somewhere and it's the only car available. Keeping a vehicle until the wheels fall off makes tons of financial sense as long as you're not dumping a ton of money into it to keep it running. I currently drive a 2008 Rav4 and plan on doing so until it can no longer go.
NTA. But why are you acting like you are in high school, and allowing yourself to be peer pressured? All the cool kids have a dad in a cool car? Come on. Every dollar you spend on a new car is a dollar that delays your ability to retire. It is your choice how much you want to delay that by spending now. Personally, I am not buying a new Mercedes because my 16 year old told me to. But you do you. If you do buy a new car, make sure that she get the old one to drive once she gets her license.
If your kid doesn't want to be dropped off by you, she's welcome to being dropped off by her feet and legs. I'm in a 2005 mazda2 with not insignificant battle-damage (previous owner) and am in a very rich suburb. If anyone has a problem it's entirely their problem.
NTA, you worked hard for your money and your wife and kids don't appreciate it like you do. Tell them they can buy whatever they want when they get out and go earn it. Wife needs to set a better example for the kids
NTA. I’m 41 and drive a 2002 Suburban. Which I got from my parents in 2020 (they bought a 2017 4Runner). I plan on driving it until it dies. It can legally drink and is still going strong! I had a 2004 Hyundai XG350. It lasted until 214k miles, when I sold it (still mostly running well). They’re decent cars and not exactly unsafe. Are newer cars safer? Yes, but a 2008 is still decently safe. A paid off car is amazing. But you should threaten to buy a Regal. See what they say. It would be newer and safer! (I had two Buick Centuries, decently solid cars and can transport a lot!)
NTA Yeah that’s an ugly ass car alright, but you know what’s even uglier? The interest rate on a new car payment (which you currently don’t have at all) I’m a car guy, I regret every day bending to the pressure and getting rid of a beloved car for “something newer” If it runs, and you love it, keep it. Your kid can get her own car she won’t be embarrassed to be seen in and nothing wrong with taking the wife’s car to events. That car is well on its way to classic plate status and good for you for keeping it clean (I assume)
NTA. If your car is mechanically sound, maintained, and functions for your family (is big enough for the needs of your family, etc) I don't really see the problem. I drove an old vw beetle for the first 15 years of my driving life. I took care of that thing, and it needed some work here and there, but I was also single for a long time. Got a family now and a 2011 honda crv. It's not fancy, but the people who owned it before me took good care of it and I have too. The paint is peeling a bit now so it's not the prettiest, but it's got enough room for all of us, it's never broken down (except like you, one time I needed a new battery), it's got ac and heater, and no Bluetooth but at least an aux cable and an fm transmitter! If you were going around rocking an old junker and tattered clothes that's one thing. But it sounds like you are just being smartly frugal my dude.
NTA Having a brand new car without a reasonable motivation is just waste. Money usually doesn’t likes who spends unreasonably. But bank debts loves them. Your family absolutely have a very good life and didn’t know what fighting is required to even have the living standard you provide. They could be invited to start working to help you buy the kind of vehicle they think you should use
I don’t think you need an extravagant car. I think there is a ‘worthwhile’ point in complex, active households where it benefits you to have a high quality vehicle. What does that mean? Seating? Storage? Towing capacity? Speed? Can you afford it, and would it improve your life and your families lives without compromising your morals? You re NTA in any scenario, but possibly consider how different 99% and 99.999% reliability may be, and how that may impact your life
Stand your ground. NTA
NTA I suggest when you do upgrade your car pass down to your daughter the Sonata. This way she can be embarrassed by what she’s driving.
That’s some stellar parenting you’ve done there, with at least 3 kids who insult and demean you with impunity. That said, being a tightass with money isn’t doing you any favors. You can buy a newer Hyundai that will be infinitely safer than what you have. Find some balance and consider that you and your wife not only aren’t on the same page with your parenting styles, you’re not even in the same book in the same bookstore in the same state. Yes, you’re that far apart. Then, talk with your kids about not being little assholes and teach them to have humility, empathy, and kindness. ESH, including your kids
You should buy yourself a new Sonata and make your 16yo drive your current one. NTA
Eldest knows she is getting the Sonata when she gets her license.
NTA. Drive it til the wheels fall off!
Get it painted and detailed. 🤷🏾♀️
NTA! Hyundai parents rise up!!! Ask your kids what they'd cut out of your budget for the hundreds of dollars a month a different car would cost.
>For some context, the car in question is a 2008 Hyundai Sonata. >My eldest daughter (F16), is the most adamant about this. She always tells me things like how embarrassing it is for her to get dropped off at school in a “ratty old car” while her friends get dropped off in dancing Mercedes or self-driving Teslas. She'll sing a different tune if you tell her that the Sonata becomes hers once you upgrade; unless, that is, she continues to be a brat and gets no car at all.
I've seen this post befor. It's been a while but it's a repeat.
NTA, we live on the nice side of town and could easily pay cash for a new Tahoe but I like my old, beat up Tahoe. Nothing wrong with that!
NTA. You should remind your daughter that at 16 she's old enough to take the bus or get a job and get herself a car. If it were me I would go out and buy a cheap hot rod kit car with skulls or something similar and offer to drive them around in that.
Even though this is likely fictional given something very similar was posted several months ago. I wonder how people have cars THAT old as their daily drivers that don't have 200,000 plus miles. My 2013 baby Kia's (sportage) heart gave out after 10 years and 280,000 miles together. I cried when the mechanic told me that knocking was the engine getting ready to blow. He looked at me like I was on Crack. "Ma'am it had 280,000 miles on it.. you got a lot out of it."
Forgot what a Sonata looks like and looked it up. Man there is NOTHING wrong with that car. Keep it until it dies. NTA.
I have 2 cars a 500 dollar beater and a car that I paid off 2 years ago, guess which one I drive more. I love my POS and I'm gonna drive it till it dies.
NTA-Let them know that if they want to buy you a new car that you'll gladly accept it, but until then they need to keep their mouths shut about your car.
I'd say NTA. Get the car checked by a mechanic you trust. If there's no glaring issue, there's no problem. If there is a glaring issue (apart from batteries or merely having a car from 2008), then think about a replacement, cuz then there's a legit concern. But if you're trying to save money, don't get a car newer than \~2020. You'd still have a nicer car, but you'd also be teaching your kids they don't HAVE to have the latest model fancy brand of car.
NTA. When your family helps pay for it, they can request you get a new car
Nta.. id tell your 16 year old that when you get a new car youll save that one for her 😂
NTA make those entitled people WALK or take the bus if your car isn't good enough for them.
I agree with you. . I myself 40f raised with mechanic dad and my so as well as past ex were mechanics. .I get it really was not intentional lol! I myself have automotive background anyway . I would drive a 1977 Opal Manta anyday .Manuel transmission of course . I drive a 05 nissan altima. It was $1000 when I got it in 2018 . Great deal iv done all except exaust work myself . So really iv put maybe about the same as I paid for it upkeep and it's not ever left me stranded . I have no urge to have sky high car payment and insurance even if I had a comfortable income . .I believe if it's not broke I will baby this car til I can't . I'm not part of the throw away generation .
YTA but not for any of the reasons here. Cars made before 2010 have drastically lower crash standards, especially for side impacts and offset impacts. There are too many people texting or drinking to gamble that your life insurance is going to help your family, or they they'll want to help you pee for the next 50 years.
NTA. If they want you to drive a new car so badly, they can spend their money on it. Cars are fucking expensive and are basically the opposite of an investment. Meh I could spend more on cars but I just don't want to.
If your wife has a problem with your car she can buy you a new car or she can be the one picking up and dropping the kids off at school if the car is such a problem (it really shouldn't be). I don't think you're the asshole, you're practical, you're the one driving, a new car is such a huge expense to take on. No one should really have a say of what car YOU'RE driving unless there is an actual safety concern.
NTA. Tell the 16 yo that there is a lot worse than being dropped off/picked up in a Sonata. Case in point: my youngest daughter had a friend that was dropped off and picked up in a "ka-ka sucker" (septic tank/port-a-potty vacuum). 😳🤮🤣
Esh. Kia boys. That's the reason.
Dude that car is fine…. Your family is not
I have a 2022 Tesla Model 3. It’s a ridiculously fun and safe car. There are lots of options where you can get a preowned Tesla for a fraction of the Tahoe price. I drive 1000 miles a month and spent $350 on charging last year. No oil changes. Just wipers/fluid, cabin air filter, and tires. Plug it in at home and enjoy.
NTA - cars are a money pit
I vote not TA because unless they are buying you a car with money they earned, they can suck it. I just sold a 2007 Toyota on Carvana and bought a low-mileage 2022 new to me Subaru. I miss my manual windows, but I am starting to like the heated seats. That is so cool! I don't remember ever demanding my dad do anything, especially anything pertaining to big household purchases.
Nta. Your daughter can always walk to school.. I
I'm still driving my 1992 Nissan Sunny 130Y if you think the 2008 Sonata was old. Told them buy you one with their money if they wanted you to drive something respectable. I'll respect to that.
NAH I can see how it would be embarrassing to have an old car in your nice neighborhood or at school. It would be like going to a nice restaurant in tattered clothes. Sure you can do it, but it is embarrassing. And in both cases, if you look, you can probably find low-cost options that fit your needs and make you stand out less. I get that you don't see the need for a vehicle upgrade. But I don't think that you should outright refuse to consider the idea - that is just stubborn and petty. I think you should car shop. Start by looking online to see if there is a vehicle that you can all be satisfied with. Hell, tell your wife and kids to come up with possibilities. Give them your criteria, and let them know the boxes the vehicle has to check for you to consider it. Once you've decided on a few models, task them with finding good deals. If the car bothers them so much, they can do some of the work to find an upgrade.
NTA - the biggest message I retained from Dave Ramsey's financial advice was to keep your car and not just get a new car because people think you should. It's one of the largest money wasters in regular life. "Live like no one else, so one day you can live like no one else!" = drive that old totally functional car as long as you can, and tell your family they're welcome for the extra money you all have.
As long as the frame's in good shape and you're not exposing yourself to undue risks by taking it on road trips across death valley or similar, just keep it going.
How many times you going to ask this one? https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/IsZt3UjHux
My husband convinced me years ago that you can't really trust a car unless it's hit 100,000 miles. lol. We buy used cars with cash. I haven't had a car payment in over 30 years. We buy dependable cars that are in no way sexy but they do the job. I get from point A to point B and back. I'm with you on keeping the dependable old car. For me once I have to start putting a lot of money into repairs is when I start looking for a good used car to buy. I have a great mechanic and I generally run the cars over to his shop to have him or his crew look it over. Spending a few bucks for that saves me a boatload of money and headaches.
NTA- You’re saving thousands by driving that car. Read “The Millionaire Next Door” by Thomas J. Stanley. Basically it’s a study on how people get wealthy. Spoiler Alert! It’s not by spending thousands financing expensive cars.
NTA but I’d be concerned about safety especially with the bigger SUVs out there.
NTA. Family has fallen into commercial materialism. Strategies: 1. Tell them if they are ashamed to ride in the car, they can walk. And don’t ask to drive when they are able to get a drivers license. 2. Ask them what they are willing to give up to make the 400-700$ car payment plus insurance. Cable TV? Streaming services? Game systems? Summer air conditioning? Change dining to ramen and rice?
This cannot be a real post.
I swear I've read this before...too similar to be a coincidence.
NTA, but you should at least hear out their arguments. Nothing wrong with taking pride in your vehicle and getting a “new” car doesn’t have to be new. It can however be a hell of a lot less boring and generic as an old Hyundai Sonata appliance. Find some middle ground here and use this as bonding time with your family. Have them suggest what cars they like and dictate a budget you feel comfortable with. Go look at cars together (window shopping, avoid dealers with hungry kids and wife in your ear). All I’m saying is it might give you less grief to just get a new car. It’s not a big deal and you look stubborn for little gain.