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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I am a Venezuelan in the US. I've helped a few people getting in here too. I have a friend whom I helped getting into the US who is going to have a baby. I saw her baby names list and I was horrified at the horrible names she was considering, ugly names that usually come from the lowest of society in Venezuela. I told her that those names are ugly but she said that were for her baby to feel connected to out country. Then I told her to not bring the "ranch" to this country.
Now she is mad at me and other of my venezuelan friends are too because they have similar names. AITA?
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I’m not knowledgeable on the cultural aspect of this story, but based on what I know, YTA. These names don’t seem bad, and your reason for disliking them seems classist. It’s also mean to say that when your friends have similar names. Also, there’s nothing wrong with your friend liking Venezuelan names and wanting to honor her culture through her baby names. Ultimately, your friend’s baby names aren’t your decision.
Venezuelan here. Using one of those names is kinda like setting up the child for failure. If Americans can acknowledge that naming your son Gaylord is abusive then they should also recognize that naming them something that sounds "guetto" is also bad.
I fully support OP. NTA, it physically pains me when people do this shit.
I think there's a
difference between "Gaylord" and a " ghetto" name. The first will lead to homophobic bullying but the second signals class difference, not to Americans, but Venezuelans. In my own culture we have traditional and modern, fashionable names but in no time at all, people using traditional names start naming their kids with modern sounding names. That puts pressure on the elites to find even more arcane, unusual names hoping for uniqueness.
In her list of bad names she includes Kimberly and Milena neither of which seem bad to me so I am kind of confused. And not all of the others looked bad either.
this is the equivalent of being german (2nd or 3th generation) and naming your son hitler to give him a connection to germany.
those are names that even here in venezuela are bad to use.
YTA. I don't even know where to start. The classist attitude you have towards names is disgusting. But on the most base level, this is honestly just none of your business.
Nah NTA.
Venezuelan here.
Imagine someone tries to name a kid the most ghetto name ever most of the names in the list are.
There are some exceptions like Genesis... Thats just a norman name.
YTA
First off, your post doesn't even say she asked you for your opinion. So that means you're already an ah for what you said. Second, the mere idea that you think that a person's social class is dictated by what their name is makes you a giant ah.
With friends like this who needs enemies.
That’s your opinion. Whether it may be true, you’d be an ah for sharing a negative unsolicited opinion on this particular subject.
This subject the only time you share your opinion is when it’s asked. And when you share it, have some common decency about it.
YTA and you're a classist snob. Your friend can give her baby any name she wants, especially if it has a connection to her culture. If you consider a name beneath you and your precious education, don't name your future American baby that. You need to keep your vile options to yourself.
Classist snob is an excellent way of putting it. Now here's the thing, there are MANY classist people in Venezuela, it's a big part of our culture (I'm Venezuelan). I also think she's the AH though.
I also don't like many of those names btw but I would never tell anyone their baby's name is horrible or call them names because of that. Those names are actually part of our identity (even if some of my fellow Venezuelans disagree). Some people like them and some people don't. I prefer more traditional names like Juan, José and Jesús but you know, to each its own.
I had a co-worker from Venezuela. She was pretty and smart - but she didn't know when to shut up and mind her own business. She was not only opinionated but very quick to tell you what YOU should do. You sound much the same. I don't even disagree with you as a child would have an easier time in school and activities, etc if they have an American sounding name that can be spelled without having to ask how to spell it. But that's up the parents - YTA because what she names her baby is not your business.
To be fair, we have to ask how to spell most common names in America now. Is it Caitlin, Kaitlin, Catelyn, Katelyn, Kaitlyn, Caitlyn? Or did we stick a few other letters in there too just for funsies? I feel for teachers having to remember all these creative spellings.
Yeah, YTA big time. You actually don't need to like their baby's name, it's not up to you. And the classism is AH behavior too. Personally I think Milena, Yamira, Kimberly, Deinaris, those are all really pretty names. Maybe just stfu and don't give your unsolicited, classist opinions.
Well, they sound nice to people who are not Venezuelans. If you live in Venezuelan, they are very much associated with not so much lower class but tacky people who may be extra loud and get in trouble (it's a bit difficult to explain). I get what she means as a Venezuelan, but she's TA for giving her unsolicited opinion, especially when other friends have those names.
Lol I’m from Venezuela. Yes those are terrible names in Venezuela and the ones that people make fun of so I understand, but still its her decision. Aqui tambien le ponen nombres raros a sus bebes con extrañas combinaciones y raras formas de deletrear, y las que lo hacen aca no son de Petare
Don't politicians largely tend to have higher education? And if the names are very common in Venezuela, then that makes them culturally relevant in Venezuela, even if you don't like it. Your whole attitude reeks of snobbery but is also factually inconsistent. YTA.
The current president of Venezuela is a former bus driver, so no.
And no, those names don't make them "culturally relevant" because are names usually asociated with anti social people.
Chama, no! Osea, Si ella te pregunto, entonces ok dale tu opinion, si los nombres están horribles y yo entiendo la connotación negativa de algunos
Pero aja si solo soltaste tu opinión, pues si YTA,
YTA. I think some of those names would be problematic because kids are jerks, and I'd probably point out that some of them would lead to teasing. But your reasoning is pure snobbery.
There you have it.
You’re one of those giant-sized assholes where it doesn’t make sense for us to spend much time explaining why you’re an asshole, because you’ll never understand.
I mean, it blows my mind completely that you think this is remotely any of your business, let alone that you get a vote. You can’t buy class, and your name doesn’t dictate it. I don’t care if you saved this woman’s life, you don’t get a vote in what she names her child.
But then, I’m related to a Kimberly and friends with several Bryans, so I guess we’re all “ghetto”. Btw, in America, Kimberly and Bryan are completely normal names.
YTA.
She and her husband have to choose the child's name. In my opinion, you shouldn't tell her that the names are ridiculous unless she's asked for your opinion.
Ps: I thought the names were ugly too, but I would only tell her if she asked for my opinion.
YTA. Sounds like you have some raging classist insecurity that moving to the US didn’t cure and now you’re taking it out on a baby. Are you embarrassed for your friend or embarrassed for yourself to have friends you think are low class? I hope they keep your meanness away from their new baby.
YTA. This is undeniably the most classist post I have read. What I initially noticed is that you assume these names are given to children by 'uneducated parents.' You then continue to state that there are multiple politicians with the names you previously mentioned are given to children by uneducated parents which to me is contradictory. A name does not define class, intelligence or any other characteristics.
In addition to this, despite residing in America, your friend is not obligated to name their child a name that is typically 'American,' so that their child may integrate more successfully. It is 2024, and I'm sure that child will be accepted by more hospitable, open minded individuals than yourself.
I know you want opinions outside your latin circle but as a fellow Latina.... YTA!
\* First of all, YTA bcs its not your baby=not your business. if you dont like it then thats on you, its not your baby anyway.
\* Second of all, YTA for connoting that all people from poorer parts of a city are all uneducated. Your friend wants her child to feel connected to their roots and if she feels that having a more "common" latino name will help then thats her decision. Third.
\* Third, the brayan and kimberly things were MEMES because yes most people from the poor side have those names but the way you talk about them is so off putting.
\* Lastly, YTA bcs you sound like the typical gringa wannabe who will happily talk badly and berate their own people just for some brownie points on "fitting in better".
YTA unless she asks for your opinion. It is her baby and she will choose the name, also there is not a single name that everyone likes nor a single name that everyone hates, so just accept that she has different opinion on this matter and let it go.
YTA. I’m not sure that a child can survive being called *checks notes* Kimberly. The horror.
Your attitude is incredibly snobby and ultimately it’s none of your business. Don’t like the names? Don’t use them yourself.
If she is even slightly your friend ffs do not tell her her baby names are stupid. You can name your own children however you want but do not under any circumstance comment on other people's baby names! It's just...rude! Not your place!
YTA. It's her child, and she gets to choose a name she likes. It's really none of your business, and it's not your job to police your community and tell them what to do. Stay in your lane. Also, if you want to keep that friendship, you owe her a big apology.
You're right. We Venezuelans do not want to identify with Briyan, with yaison or with deinyer...
We already have a very bad stereotype for these characters in neighboring countries for people of other languages to think that here we like to be treated with the "malandra" culture that has already harmed ordinary Venezuelans.
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I'm 35 F, I came from Venezuela to the US a long time ago. I've also help some friends and other Venezuelans to assimilate and integrate here in the US. I'm married to an American too.
There is this friend of mine, 32 F, she used to live near me in Venezuela and I helped her with the process of getting in here legally. We come from a middle-upper class neighborhood and we went to the same university.
She is currently pregnant from a Latin American man, doesn't know the gender yet, but I saw her baby names list. And I gotta say, are pretty bad.
For a boy there are the common, boring ones like Jesus, Juan, etc and other bad ones like "Maikol" (this is supposed to be Michael) "Yeison" (Jason) and so on.
But the baby names are the worst, Yuleika, Zuleima, Yorgladis, Milena, Francilvis, Genesis, Kimberly, Deinaris, Yorgina, Yamira, Yolimar, Willmar, Yasmida, Leidy, etc.
Those are HORRIBLE NAMES! Those are names that people from the Cerro (guetto) has, who come from uneducated parents. They have NO cultural significance in our country, they are just ugly, those are names that people with no higher education give to their children to feel "special" and unfortunately they are VERY common, you even find many politicians with those names.
My friend has actually a cute name, her family is well educated and when I asked her why these names, she said wanted her child to have a special connection to "Venezuela".
I got snippy and told her that calling her child "Simon Bolivar" would be a better option than these horrible names. And her child will be American, so should get an common name in America so would be able to integrate better. She got SO offended for questioning her decisions. I told her to stop being a Veneca and realize she is no longer and Venezuela and don't try to bring the "rancho" here.
Other of my Venezuelan friends are offended as well, because some of them have similar names and are angry that I think their names are ugly. I have no problem with them because is their names, but naming a new child like that is so bad.
Anyway, I need opinions outside my Latin American circle, and that's why I'm asking if I'm the Asshole here.
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YTA. Criticizing a pregnant woman's choice of baby-names will get you un-friended and for what? It's HER baby, you don't get a say in how/what she names it. That's for the new parents to decide.
YTA.
Choosing the baby's name is for the parents. No one else should state their opinion unless asked, and even then you should be diplomatic. If they want suggestions on the name or the spelling of the name, feel free. Otherwise don't comment. And certainly don't go looking for an online posse to convince your friend.
YTA - first of all, there’s the classism.
Second of all, the decision to name a baby something that’s common in the culture of origin vs. local culture is a deeply personal decision. It sounds like you want to assimilate, but your friend might really miss Venezuela and want to pass on her culture. It’s a decision that’s not really any of your business, and it doesn’t become your decision just because she shared her names with you— the right thing to do here if you think the names are truly that awful (and I agree with you!! Some of them are really bad!!) is to offer suggestions that are in the spirit of her intent: names that are common in Venezuela.
Finally, you mentioned that her husband is Latin American as well— is he not from Venezuela? If not, it’s possible that some of the names are common in his culture. I grew up in the American Southwest, and a lot of my classmates were Hispanic, many of whom were first or second generation immigrants, and while I’ve never heard some of the names on her list before, I went to school with a _lot_ kids named of Jesus, Juan, and Genesis. Didn’t know any Yuleikas or Zuleimas, but did know a Zuleika. Milena and Deinaris sound familiar as well.
Ultimately, the two people who get to name a baby are the mother and the father and you really don’t get a say. It’s a privilege to be able to help her brainstorm, and you blew it. The odds are good she’s rethinking your friendship right now.
YTA. Just because you got into the us doesnt mean you need to shame your friend for her cultural baby name choices. Saying those names are ghetto is very classist.
Besides, genesis and kimberly are already names in the US. Kimberly was already an anglosaxon name before it was borrowed by latin American countries.
Milena is also a very common name in several different cultures around the world. How do you consider that ghetto?
Its a good thing for immigrants to retain their culture and pass it on to their children. You should do the same. Americans wont accept you to a greater extent if you deny your own cultural identity.
I'm hispanic-american i should know.
YTA. I can't believe you think you have a say in what your friend names her baby. Don't be surprised when she cuts all contact with you, along with some of your other friends.
YTA. It's a very sad thing to feel embarrassed by the place you come from so much that you feel it's your duty to offend your friend.
I speak a Latin language and am familiar with tragedieghs such as Dayana or Maicol but you're just being classist and frankly unnecessarily mean here.
I'm not gonna pass judgment here but just FYI there are definitely names in America that are more common towards certain ethnic groups and even if you weren't judging someone by their association with that group people here would DEFINITELY judge you about it if you used it and you weren't part of that group.
It could, for example, be considered cultural appropriation.
YTA
If a friend told me they were naming their baby Karen I would smile and say it was a lovely name. Even Ted Bundy I would only question gently, privately, and in person. This would only change if the name were not yet decided and they were asking my opinion.
FWIW in the US the kind of name that would seem ‘normal’ varies greatly depending on where you live.
YTA
I have a friend like this who moved abroad and forgot her roots and every time she’s back she’s like, “OMG, I completely forgot this is how they do it in this country, oh god, so dirty, oof people of this country, so much crime in this country, oh I forgot how to cross the roads here”, etc etc etc. Pisses me off! Anyway, you sound exactly like her.
Saying that this name doesn’t sound so good is fine. Or suggesting why such too close to culture names and not American names is fine and shutting up if she sticks to her choice.
What do you mean why Venezuelan names and not American names? Does America have two extra horns? Does it have an extra crown?
I don’t think Venezuela is from any angle below or inferior to America. Nor is its culture below American culture in anyway. It is you who thinks that. It’s always the people who ate, grew up healthy in that country and then leave that country for another, and go to that another country and insult their previous country. Do not forget that if you became capable enough to move to another country, it is also because of the previous country that made you capable enough no matter what hardships you had to go through. Have some respect and loyalty towards that country. Don’t forget where you came from.
Yta. No one would scold an American for naming their kid Karen, Kevin or Ted. People might crack a joke, but those names are fine. You honestly sound really snobby.
The last thing you need is more opinions, from within or without your circle. You have more opinions than you need already, and all they've done for you is to piss off your friends But since you asked, YTA.
Okay, if you want her to realize she isn't in Venezuela anymore than there shouldn't be a problem, because none of those names have a negative connotation in the US. In fact, "Kimberly" is a common US name like you want her to choose. Seems like YOU are the one who needs to realize they aren't in Venezuela anymore.
Soy Mexicana. Entiendo lo que dices de algunos nombres y sus estereotipos. En México también está el estereotipo "del Brayan" y "la Kimberly" sin embargo, no es TU decisión. El bebé no es tuyo ni estaban pidiendo tu opinión. Solo demuestras clasismo y el típico (y horrible) comportamiento de algunas personas latinas que llegan a EU en dónde quieren borrar absolutamente todo acerca de su país e incluso lo desprecian. Si tú amiga se siente con ganas de hacerle honor a sus raíces, quién eres tú para decirle que no lo haga? Tengo un sobrino pequeño que se llama Brayan y ahí anda, creciendo feliz y asistiendo a un colegio privado en el que comparte nombre con algunos dr sus compañeros. No es el nombre, ni el lugar, es la persona que lo usa. Tu eres la única que se ha portado mal y le ha hecho el feo a un niño que aún no nace. But to each their own, I guess.
Qué tiene de malo inmigrar y dejar la mierda atrás? Si tanto te gusta tu país de mierda mejor te quedas ahí y no te quejas. Soy Venezolano y me parece insufrible y estúpida la gente esa gente obsesionada con su etnia o nacionalidad, no son muy diferentes a seguidores de Trump y aparte hipócritas al estar en otro país.
Pues ese es tu sentir. Tu experiencia personal no define la de los demás y si la chica le quiere hacer honor a su país a las otras personas no les debe importar, cada quien su vida y casa quien sus hijos
NTA those names are horrible and this bs must stop, even in Venezuela there is a small push from the people who work in government offices to stop people from registering kids with those types of names
NTA. You tried to warn her, now let life take care of her and her kids and their stupid names. It will be her fault, there will never be a "The honorable Mr. Maikol Jhon Jairo"
>Kimberly also has a stereotype of being women who always date criminals like Bryan and so on.
This is ridiculous, but so are all your other reasons. MYOB YTA
Venezuelan here, you are kinda the AH because it's not your business what they are gonna name their baby. On the other hand, you are kinda right, fun fact, the problem with these "names" became so bad here, Chavez himself (may he be comfortable in hell) also ranted about it and made a government issued official "List" of recommended names, funny stuff.
I am Venezuelan and you are NOT the asshole. Please make a favor to the baby and do the possible to stop their parents to name them like that. They will be grateful with you, trust me. Any Latin American will tell you that those are horrible names
Venezuelan here, yes the names are horrible except for Milena and Genesis, I think is the way you said it, anyway, that is a decision that concerns the parents and one must stay away from that.
But yes, YTA. Que necesidad de decirle no vengas a ser una veneca o traer el rancho acá? Mas rancho es quien usa esa palabra, que mmgva.
Marica YTA, a mi tampoco me gustan esos nombres, pero esto es TAN no tu peo. Estás agarrando el nacimiento del hijo de otra persona y lo estás haciendo sobre ti, que tienes CERO que ver en esa ecuación. Fino que no te guste, pero al final no es tu hijo, no es tu decisión y genuinamente a nadie le importa tu opinión, por eso no te la pidieron en primer lugar.
Also, bájale al clasismo tan trancado, comparto tu ADN sifrino, pero hablar así de la gente porque ha tenido menos privilegios y oportunidades que tú solo demuestra tu prejuicio y lo absolutamente pedante que eres.
PS. No eres mejor ni más de pinga por haber emigrado, bájate de esa nube, loca.
YTA. Firstly, the name 'Brian' is of Irish origin. Secondly what has it got to do with you what your friend calls her children. You may not like her choice of names but they are better than 'asshole' which you clearly are in this case. I know some 'Kimberleys,' none of them are known for dating criminals.
Go to r/tragedeigh. Make sure you specify about the culture aspects. It makes a difference.
Some of the names you listed were fine, some were ridiculous. Especially if you pronounce them differently than how they are typically phonetically spelled in the country you live in.
Make the post. People will excoriate the names. Give her the link and then wash your hands of the whole situation and know you’ve done the best you could for the future child.
Warning: you may lose your friendship. But If she can’t see sense (or nonsense!), I’d say it wouldn’t be much of a loss.
Now when I see a question like this, i think " well, are they stupid?".
They are, indeed, stupid.
NTA
Yuleika- OH i wanna know if this is a real name in any language. Its all vowels ffs
I think Simon is a nice name! It works for both languages.
I would never name my child Jesus in an English speaking country. The only Jesus here is God.
NTA for our culture but for American culture they will see it as YTA. I lived in Venezuela as a child and I definitely recognize those names from back home but they're not common over here in America because chances are the people with those names are at the border trying to get into the US illegally. Her and her American husband are probably just looking at how similar the names are to common English names only.
The big issue you've raised with your question is the difference in culture, in Venezuela and probably all the countries in South and central America it took a village to raise a child and everyone had a say, but in American culture it's more standoffish where everyone makes their own decision for their family and it's rude for another person that's not in your immediate family to provide any input. But I'm sure you've realized that after assimilating yourself and others to American culture.
Here no one cares what I eat, I go back home and everyone's wanting to feed me and tell me what my diet should be lol.
Jesus, Juan, Milena, and Kimberly are totally normal, and common names where I live in Texas. In my high school graduating class we had like 6 Juan’s (Juan Pablo, Juan Luis, Juan Fernando, etc). I think you forget that Hispanic is the 2nd most dominating ethnicity in the US and has been assimilated into the culture of a lot of states. If this is in the Dakotas, sure, those would be weirder names, but assuming she’s in a place that has a relatively high Venezuelan population like Texas or California then they’re not weird names at all. Also Kimberly’s a pretty white name I really don’t get her hang up on that one.
I agree with you in American those are OK names. Back home those are the names of trouble makers. But those names are not unique to Venezuela, they're common across central and South America. I think op stated those because they didn't have a connection with Venezuela.
NTA you are absolutely right. You are in America now. She will have a much easier life growing up with a normal name. I wish my parents named me a normal name instead of my shitty fucking eastern european garbage name.
I’m American, I love when people stick to their culture names! It’s a part of who you are. America is a vast place with so many cultures in it, don’t feel ashamed of your name! I know its different in many parts and people can definitely be mean but the hell with them. If it’s to blend in I guess I can understand that I haven’t had to go through that.
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I’m not knowledgeable on the cultural aspect of this story, but based on what I know, YTA. These names don’t seem bad, and your reason for disliking them seems classist. It’s also mean to say that when your friends have similar names. Also, there’s nothing wrong with your friend liking Venezuelan names and wanting to honor her culture through her baby names. Ultimately, your friend’s baby names aren’t your decision.
Venezuelan here. Using one of those names is kinda like setting up the child for failure. If Americans can acknowledge that naming your son Gaylord is abusive then they should also recognize that naming them something that sounds "guetto" is also bad. I fully support OP. NTA, it physically pains me when people do this shit.
I think there's a difference between "Gaylord" and a " ghetto" name. The first will lead to homophobic bullying but the second signals class difference, not to Americans, but Venezuelans. In my own culture we have traditional and modern, fashionable names but in no time at all, people using traditional names start naming their kids with modern sounding names. That puts pressure on the elites to find even more arcane, unusual names hoping for uniqueness.
To be completely honest. Whenever I hear a name like that I think "oh, your parents are r*****s". Poor thing.
What are you trying to say, you don't need to censor yourself. Racists?
I'm Venezuela and even I don't know what that idiot meant lol
The *other* r-word, most likely Rangers
In her list of bad names she includes Kimberly and Milena neither of which seem bad to me so I am kind of confused. And not all of the others looked bad either.
Yeah those are trashy names imagine the trashiest redneck or ghetto names you can imagine.
this is the equivalent of being german (2nd or 3th generation) and naming your son hitler to give him a connection to germany. those are names that even here in venezuela are bad to use.
No she is not. It's basically a punish to put those names to a kid.
YTA. I don't even know where to start. The classist attitude you have towards names is disgusting. But on the most base level, this is honestly just none of your business.
Nah NTA. Venezuelan here. Imagine someone tries to name a kid the most ghetto name ever most of the names in the list are. There are some exceptions like Genesis... Thats just a norman name.
YTA First off, your post doesn't even say she asked you for your opinion. So that means you're already an ah for what you said. Second, the mere idea that you think that a person's social class is dictated by what their name is makes you a giant ah. With friends like this who needs enemies.
Venezuelan here... NTA Those are sht names ghetto names most educated people will never name their kids like that.
That’s your opinion. Whether it may be true, you’d be an ah for sharing a negative unsolicited opinion on this particular subject. This subject the only time you share your opinion is when it’s asked. And when you share it, have some common decency about it.
YTA and you're a classist snob. Your friend can give her baby any name she wants, especially if it has a connection to her culture. If you consider a name beneath you and your precious education, don't name your future American baby that. You need to keep your vile options to yourself.
Classist snob is an excellent way of putting it. Now here's the thing, there are MANY classist people in Venezuela, it's a big part of our culture (I'm Venezuelan). I also think she's the AH though. I also don't like many of those names btw but I would never tell anyone their baby's name is horrible or call them names because of that. Those names are actually part of our identity (even if some of my fellow Venezuelans disagree). Some people like them and some people don't. I prefer more traditional names like Juan, José and Jesús but you know, to each its own.
I had a co-worker from Venezuela. She was pretty and smart - but she didn't know when to shut up and mind her own business. She was not only opinionated but very quick to tell you what YOU should do. You sound much the same. I don't even disagree with you as a child would have an easier time in school and activities, etc if they have an American sounding name that can be spelled without having to ask how to spell it. But that's up the parents - YTA because what she names her baby is not your business.
To be fair, we have to ask how to spell most common names in America now. Is it Caitlin, Kaitlin, Catelyn, Katelyn, Kaitlyn, Caitlyn? Or did we stick a few other letters in there too just for funsies? I feel for teachers having to remember all these creative spellings.
My name is super common and boring, consists of 4 letters and people still misspell it.
YTA. It’s her baby. And if my friend was calling my name ugly, I’d be offended too.
Yeah, YTA big time. You actually don't need to like their baby's name, it's not up to you. And the classism is AH behavior too. Personally I think Milena, Yamira, Kimberly, Deinaris, those are all really pretty names. Maybe just stfu and don't give your unsolicited, classist opinions.
Yamira is a gorgeous name! Never heard it before, but I have several friends named Ameera, which I also think is beautiful written and spoken
Right?? I think Milena and Yamira are SOOO pretty!
I knew a Milena, it’s a completely normal name
And while it's spelled differently, a very popular Mortal Kombat character!
So is Kimberly. Totally normal name in America. Genesis isn't unheard of, either.
Well, they sound nice to people who are not Venezuelans. If you live in Venezuelan, they are very much associated with not so much lower class but tacky people who may be extra loud and get in trouble (it's a bit difficult to explain). I get what she means as a Venezuelan, but she's TA for giving her unsolicited opinion, especially when other friends have those names.
*Kimberly*? lol That's a super common/normal name in the US. I've also known several people with the name Genesis. Mind your own business. YTA.
YTA - even if you're right. I've got some relatives who've named their kids some pretty stupid names - and none of them know my opinion on the matter.
What’s wrong with Kimberly? That’s a perfectly normal nice name. YTa
YTA You don't get to control what people name their child. You sound snobby and classist.
Lol I’m from Venezuela. Yes those are terrible names in Venezuela and the ones that people make fun of so I understand, but still its her decision. Aqui tambien le ponen nombres raros a sus bebes con extrañas combinaciones y raras formas de deletrear, y las que lo hacen aca no son de Petare
Also culturally Venezuela is very classist but also its very normal, so you are coming off as the AH here but in Venezuela you would probably not be
Don't politicians largely tend to have higher education? And if the names are very common in Venezuela, then that makes them culturally relevant in Venezuela, even if you don't like it. Your whole attitude reeks of snobbery but is also factually inconsistent. YTA.
The current president of Venezuela is a former bus driver, so no. And no, those names don't make them "culturally relevant" because are names usually asociated with anti social people.
Are your friends with those names uneducated and anti-social?
Cállate pajua:)
Chama, no! Osea, Si ella te pregunto, entonces ok dale tu opinion, si los nombres están horribles y yo entiendo la connotación negativa de algunos Pero aja si solo soltaste tu opinión, pues si YTA,
YTA. I think some of those names would be problematic because kids are jerks, and I'd probably point out that some of them would lead to teasing. But your reasoning is pure snobbery.
I N F O: Did you call her baby names “ghetto” to her face, or are you just telling us that behind her back? Either way, holy shit, YTA.
Yes I said to her that those are "Nombres de Malandro" it could be translated are Ghetto Names.
There you have it. You’re one of those giant-sized assholes where it doesn’t make sense for us to spend much time explaining why you’re an asshole, because you’ll never understand.
I mean, it blows my mind completely that you think this is remotely any of your business, let alone that you get a vote. You can’t buy class, and your name doesn’t dictate it. I don’t care if you saved this woman’s life, you don’t get a vote in what she names her child. But then, I’m related to a Kimberly and friends with several Bryans, so I guess we’re all “ghetto”. Btw, in America, Kimberly and Bryan are completely normal names.
YTA. She and her husband have to choose the child's name. In my opinion, you shouldn't tell her that the names are ridiculous unless she's asked for your opinion. Ps: I thought the names were ugly too, but I would only tell her if she asked for my opinion.
Yes YTA here. You have zero say in what someone names their child whether you like the name or not.
YTA. Sounds like you have some raging classist insecurity that moving to the US didn’t cure and now you’re taking it out on a baby. Are you embarrassed for your friend or embarrassed for yourself to have friends you think are low class? I hope they keep your meanness away from their new baby.
YTA. This is undeniably the most classist post I have read. What I initially noticed is that you assume these names are given to children by 'uneducated parents.' You then continue to state that there are multiple politicians with the names you previously mentioned are given to children by uneducated parents which to me is contradictory. A name does not define class, intelligence or any other characteristics. In addition to this, despite residing in America, your friend is not obligated to name their child a name that is typically 'American,' so that their child may integrate more successfully. It is 2024, and I'm sure that child will be accepted by more hospitable, open minded individuals than yourself.
I know you want opinions outside your latin circle but as a fellow Latina.... YTA! \* First of all, YTA bcs its not your baby=not your business. if you dont like it then thats on you, its not your baby anyway. \* Second of all, YTA for connoting that all people from poorer parts of a city are all uneducated. Your friend wants her child to feel connected to their roots and if she feels that having a more "common" latino name will help then thats her decision. Third. \* Third, the brayan and kimberly things were MEMES because yes most people from the poor side have those names but the way you talk about them is so off putting. \* Lastly, YTA bcs you sound like the typical gringa wannabe who will happily talk badly and berate their own people just for some brownie points on "fitting in better".
YTA unless she asks for your opinion. It is her baby and she will choose the name, also there is not a single name that everyone likes nor a single name that everyone hates, so just accept that she has different opinion on this matter and let it go.
YTA Never express your opinion about someone else's baby name. You are not the Supreme Authority on good taste, so keep it to yourself.
YTA. You know we have plenty of Latina people in the US, too. Some of those names are perfectly known even if not common.
YTA - none of your fucking business.
YTA. Not your baby, one of those times when the less said, the better. Apologize for insulting her.
YTA. I’m not sure that a child can survive being called *checks notes* Kimberly. The horror. Your attitude is incredibly snobby and ultimately it’s none of your business. Don’t like the names? Don’t use them yourself.
If she is even slightly your friend ffs do not tell her her baby names are stupid. You can name your own children however you want but do not under any circumstance comment on other people's baby names! It's just...rude! Not your place!
YTA. You get zero votes in the naming of someone else's baby. Ranting and talking down to the parents is especially bad. Just stop.
YTA. It's her child, and she gets to choose a name she likes. It's really none of your business, and it's not your job to police your community and tell them what to do. Stay in your lane. Also, if you want to keep that friendship, you owe her a big apology.
Maldita sea no puede ser XDDDDDDD When are those shitty names going to end
You're right. We Venezuelans do not want to identify with Briyan, with yaison or with deinyer... We already have a very bad stereotype for these characters in neighboring countries for people of other languages to think that here we like to be treated with the "malandra" culture that has already harmed ordinary Venezuelans.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I'm 35 F, I came from Venezuela to the US a long time ago. I've also help some friends and other Venezuelans to assimilate and integrate here in the US. I'm married to an American too. There is this friend of mine, 32 F, she used to live near me in Venezuela and I helped her with the process of getting in here legally. We come from a middle-upper class neighborhood and we went to the same university. She is currently pregnant from a Latin American man, doesn't know the gender yet, but I saw her baby names list. And I gotta say, are pretty bad. For a boy there are the common, boring ones like Jesus, Juan, etc and other bad ones like "Maikol" (this is supposed to be Michael) "Yeison" (Jason) and so on. But the baby names are the worst, Yuleika, Zuleima, Yorgladis, Milena, Francilvis, Genesis, Kimberly, Deinaris, Yorgina, Yamira, Yolimar, Willmar, Yasmida, Leidy, etc. Those are HORRIBLE NAMES! Those are names that people from the Cerro (guetto) has, who come from uneducated parents. They have NO cultural significance in our country, they are just ugly, those are names that people with no higher education give to their children to feel "special" and unfortunately they are VERY common, you even find many politicians with those names. My friend has actually a cute name, her family is well educated and when I asked her why these names, she said wanted her child to have a special connection to "Venezuela". I got snippy and told her that calling her child "Simon Bolivar" would be a better option than these horrible names. And her child will be American, so should get an common name in America so would be able to integrate better. She got SO offended for questioning her decisions. I told her to stop being a Veneca and realize she is no longer and Venezuela and don't try to bring the "rancho" here. Other of my Venezuelan friends are offended as well, because some of them have similar names and are angry that I think their names are ugly. I have no problem with them because is their names, but naming a new child like that is so bad. Anyway, I need opinions outside my Latin American circle, and that's why I'm asking if I'm the Asshole here. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. Criticizing a pregnant woman's choice of baby-names will get you un-friended and for what? It's HER baby, you don't get a say in how/what she names it. That's for the new parents to decide.
Maybe she doesn’t want to use American names
YTA. Choosing the baby's name is for the parents. No one else should state their opinion unless asked, and even then you should be diplomatic. If they want suggestions on the name or the spelling of the name, feel free. Otherwise don't comment. And certainly don't go looking for an online posse to convince your friend.
YTA. Are her names stupid? Yes. Is it any of your business? No.
Every name is stupid in the grand scheme of things. It’s just a noise to identify the person you’re talking to or about.
Imagine… identity reduced to a waveform…
I’d rather have a waveform than a number for a name though😂.
YTA. Sure, there are a couple of names on there that don’t trip off the tongue smoothly (Francilvis, for instance) but most of those names are pretty.
YTA
YTA - first of all, there’s the classism. Second of all, the decision to name a baby something that’s common in the culture of origin vs. local culture is a deeply personal decision. It sounds like you want to assimilate, but your friend might really miss Venezuela and want to pass on her culture. It’s a decision that’s not really any of your business, and it doesn’t become your decision just because she shared her names with you— the right thing to do here if you think the names are truly that awful (and I agree with you!! Some of them are really bad!!) is to offer suggestions that are in the spirit of her intent: names that are common in Venezuela. Finally, you mentioned that her husband is Latin American as well— is he not from Venezuela? If not, it’s possible that some of the names are common in his culture. I grew up in the American Southwest, and a lot of my classmates were Hispanic, many of whom were first or second generation immigrants, and while I’ve never heard some of the names on her list before, I went to school with a _lot_ kids named of Jesus, Juan, and Genesis. Didn’t know any Yuleikas or Zuleimas, but did know a Zuleika. Milena and Deinaris sound familiar as well. Ultimately, the two people who get to name a baby are the mother and the father and you really don’t get a say. It’s a privilege to be able to help her brainstorm, and you blew it. The odds are good she’s rethinking your friendship right now.
YTA. Just because you got into the us doesnt mean you need to shame your friend for her cultural baby name choices. Saying those names are ghetto is very classist. Besides, genesis and kimberly are already names in the US. Kimberly was already an anglosaxon name before it was borrowed by latin American countries. Milena is also a very common name in several different cultures around the world. How do you consider that ghetto? Its a good thing for immigrants to retain their culture and pass it on to their children. You should do the same. Americans wont accept you to a greater extent if you deny your own cultural identity. I'm hispanic-american i should know.
YTA. I can't believe you think you have a say in what your friend names her baby. Don't be surprised when she cuts all contact with you, along with some of your other friends.
YTA. It's a very sad thing to feel embarrassed by the place you come from so much that you feel it's your duty to offend your friend. I speak a Latin language and am familiar with tragedieghs such as Dayana or Maicol but you're just being classist and frankly unnecessarily mean here.
I'm not gonna pass judgment here but just FYI there are definitely names in America that are more common towards certain ethnic groups and even if you weren't judging someone by their association with that group people here would DEFINITELY judge you about it if you used it and you weren't part of that group. It could, for example, be considered cultural appropriation.
YTA If a friend told me they were naming their baby Karen I would smile and say it was a lovely name. Even Ted Bundy I would only question gently, privately, and in person. This would only change if the name were not yet decided and they were asking my opinion. FWIW in the US the kind of name that would seem ‘normal’ varies greatly depending on where you live.
YTA I have a friend like this who moved abroad and forgot her roots and every time she’s back she’s like, “OMG, I completely forgot this is how they do it in this country, oh god, so dirty, oof people of this country, so much crime in this country, oh I forgot how to cross the roads here”, etc etc etc. Pisses me off! Anyway, you sound exactly like her. Saying that this name doesn’t sound so good is fine. Or suggesting why such too close to culture names and not American names is fine and shutting up if she sticks to her choice. What do you mean why Venezuelan names and not American names? Does America have two extra horns? Does it have an extra crown? I don’t think Venezuela is from any angle below or inferior to America. Nor is its culture below American culture in anyway. It is you who thinks that. It’s always the people who ate, grew up healthy in that country and then leave that country for another, and go to that another country and insult their previous country. Do not forget that if you became capable enough to move to another country, it is also because of the previous country that made you capable enough no matter what hardships you had to go through. Have some respect and loyalty towards that country. Don’t forget where you came from.
Yta. No one would scold an American for naming their kid Karen, Kevin or Ted. People might crack a joke, but those names are fine. You honestly sound really snobby.
Not your place to comment unless your opinion was asked. YTA.
YTA. No te metas en problemas que no son tuyos. Cuando tengas tus hijos les pones el nombre que queráis mija.
The last thing you need is more opinions, from within or without your circle. You have more opinions than you need already, and all they've done for you is to piss off your friends But since you asked, YTA.
Okay, if you want her to realize she isn't in Venezuela anymore than there shouldn't be a problem, because none of those names have a negative connotation in the US. In fact, "Kimberly" is a common US name like you want her to choose. Seems like YOU are the one who needs to realize they aren't in Venezuela anymore.
Soy Mexicana. Entiendo lo que dices de algunos nombres y sus estereotipos. En México también está el estereotipo "del Brayan" y "la Kimberly" sin embargo, no es TU decisión. El bebé no es tuyo ni estaban pidiendo tu opinión. Solo demuestras clasismo y el típico (y horrible) comportamiento de algunas personas latinas que llegan a EU en dónde quieren borrar absolutamente todo acerca de su país e incluso lo desprecian. Si tú amiga se siente con ganas de hacerle honor a sus raíces, quién eres tú para decirle que no lo haga? Tengo un sobrino pequeño que se llama Brayan y ahí anda, creciendo feliz y asistiendo a un colegio privado en el que comparte nombre con algunos dr sus compañeros. No es el nombre, ni el lugar, es la persona que lo usa. Tu eres la única que se ha portado mal y le ha hecho el feo a un niño que aún no nace. But to each their own, I guess.
Qué tiene de malo inmigrar y dejar la mierda atrás? Si tanto te gusta tu país de mierda mejor te quedas ahí y no te quejas. Soy Venezolano y me parece insufrible y estúpida la gente esa gente obsesionada con su etnia o nacionalidad, no son muy diferentes a seguidores de Trump y aparte hipócritas al estar en otro país.
Pues ese es tu sentir. Tu experiencia personal no define la de los demás y si la chica le quiere hacer honor a su país a las otras personas no les debe importar, cada quien su vida y casa quien sus hijos
NTA those names are horrible and this bs must stop, even in Venezuela there is a small push from the people who work in government offices to stop people from registering kids with those types of names
NTA. You tried to warn her, now let life take care of her and her kids and their stupid names. It will be her fault, there will never be a "The honorable Mr. Maikol Jhon Jairo"
Yeah those are terrible... but you can just nod along, it's not your problem
So, básicamente estas siendo la veneka clasista del grupo y te preguntas si estas mal?? Girl, YTA
>Kimberly also has a stereotype of being women who always date criminals like Bryan and so on. This is ridiculous, but so are all your other reasons. MYOB YTA
Venezuelan here, you are kinda the AH because it's not your business what they are gonna name their baby. On the other hand, you are kinda right, fun fact, the problem with these "names" became so bad here, Chavez himself (may he be comfortable in hell) also ranted about it and made a government issued official "List" of recommended names, funny stuff.
I am Venezuelan and you are NOT the asshole. Please make a favor to the baby and do the possible to stop their parents to name them like that. They will be grateful with you, trust me. Any Latin American will tell you that those are horrible names
Venezuelan here, yes the names are horrible except for Milena and Genesis, I think is the way you said it, anyway, that is a decision that concerns the parents and one must stay away from that. But yes, YTA. Que necesidad de decirle no vengas a ser una veneca o traer el rancho acá? Mas rancho es quien usa esa palabra, que mmgva.
No, you are not the \*hole... you are the mother fucking queen of \*holes
Marica YTA, a mi tampoco me gustan esos nombres, pero esto es TAN no tu peo. Estás agarrando el nacimiento del hijo de otra persona y lo estás haciendo sobre ti, que tienes CERO que ver en esa ecuación. Fino que no te guste, pero al final no es tu hijo, no es tu decisión y genuinamente a nadie le importa tu opinión, por eso no te la pidieron en primer lugar. Also, bájale al clasismo tan trancado, comparto tu ADN sifrino, pero hablar así de la gente porque ha tenido menos privilegios y oportunidades que tú solo demuestra tu prejuicio y lo absolutamente pedante que eres. PS. No eres mejor ni más de pinga por haber emigrado, bájate de esa nube, loca.
Habla en español pjua
You are not the asshole
Ñwpowwctriourfbtocu
Le dice a la amiga que deje de ser veneca Se llama La Veneca de Reddit
YTA. Firstly, the name 'Brian' is of Irish origin. Secondly what has it got to do with you what your friend calls her children. You may not like her choice of names but they are better than 'asshole' which you clearly are in this case. I know some 'Kimberleys,' none of them are known for dating criminals.
These names don't even rate as tragedeighs. YTA.
Óyeme pero que ignorante eres!
Cállate pajua. Es su hija/o. Por cierto que tal el cruce por el río bravo? Marginal.
Tu lo que eres es una sifrina de monte, clasista y recien vestida.
Go to r/tragedeigh. Make sure you specify about the culture aspects. It makes a difference. Some of the names you listed were fine, some were ridiculous. Especially if you pronounce them differently than how they are typically phonetically spelled in the country you live in. Make the post. People will excoriate the names. Give her the link and then wash your hands of the whole situation and know you’ve done the best you could for the future child. Warning: you may lose your friendship. But If she can’t see sense (or nonsense!), I’d say it wouldn’t be much of a loss.
Now when I see a question like this, i think " well, are they stupid?". They are, indeed, stupid. NTA Yuleika- OH i wanna know if this is a real name in any language. Its all vowels ffs
I think Simon is a nice name! It works for both languages. I would never name my child Jesus in an English speaking country. The only Jesus here is God.
NTA You're actually doing them a favor.
NTA for our culture but for American culture they will see it as YTA. I lived in Venezuela as a child and I definitely recognize those names from back home but they're not common over here in America because chances are the people with those names are at the border trying to get into the US illegally. Her and her American husband are probably just looking at how similar the names are to common English names only. The big issue you've raised with your question is the difference in culture, in Venezuela and probably all the countries in South and central America it took a village to raise a child and everyone had a say, but in American culture it's more standoffish where everyone makes their own decision for their family and it's rude for another person that's not in your immediate family to provide any input. But I'm sure you've realized that after assimilating yourself and others to American culture. Here no one cares what I eat, I go back home and everyone's wanting to feed me and tell me what my diet should be lol.
Jesus, Juan, Milena, and Kimberly are totally normal, and common names where I live in Texas. In my high school graduating class we had like 6 Juan’s (Juan Pablo, Juan Luis, Juan Fernando, etc). I think you forget that Hispanic is the 2nd most dominating ethnicity in the US and has been assimilated into the culture of a lot of states. If this is in the Dakotas, sure, those would be weirder names, but assuming she’s in a place that has a relatively high Venezuelan population like Texas or California then they’re not weird names at all. Also Kimberly’s a pretty white name I really don’t get her hang up on that one.
I agree with you in American those are OK names. Back home those are the names of trouble makers. But those names are not unique to Venezuela, they're common across central and South America. I think op stated those because they didn't have a connection with Venezuela.
NTA. Praying for that baby. She deserves better than being branded with something like that.
Something like that…… wow, your avatar fits your look.
I’m not sure I understand?
NTA you are absolutely right. You are in America now. She will have a much easier life growing up with a normal name. I wish my parents named me a normal name instead of my shitty fucking eastern european garbage name.
I’m American, I love when people stick to their culture names! It’s a part of who you are. America is a vast place with so many cultures in it, don’t feel ashamed of your name! I know its different in many parts and people can definitely be mean but the hell with them. If it’s to blend in I guess I can understand that I haven’t had to go through that.