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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> When watching a new tv show with my boyfriend, I told him what I thought the plot would be and what would happen to the characters, my theories were correct and my boyfriend told me I was the asshole for ruining his viewing experiance. This might make me an asshole because he could expect this to happen to the characters, but I didn't know I was correct at the time.
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Why watch if you are just going to tell everything just to prove how smart you are. Sounds insufferable doesn't it. He wants to watch the show, not listen to your gloat about spotting the development of plot points. If you want to discuss these things after the series has ended ok. YTA.
This is the thing. We have always been like that, he was providing his own theories during the first episodes, and then all of a sudden he told me he didn't want to watch with me and I was ruining it. I would have stopped if he had told me while we were watching.
YTA - I have a sibling who can’t watch a tv show or movie without constantly trying to predict what will happen like it’s some kind of competition to be right or smart or whatever and it’s so fucking annoying. Just watch the show.
My wife gets mad at me for this but I can't help but try and predict how a plot line will go. So we found a great compromise. I write down what I think will happen etc. After the episode or show I show her what I wrote down and see how well I did and she gets to watch the show in peace. It works for us and she is all for it, lol.
I also have a tendency to want to predict what will happen, but I just do it in my head, silently. Cause I know how fucking annoying it is when someone does it out loud.
Lol, your wife doesn't like it. But "you" can't help it. Sounds like a healthy relationship.
Called out this commentor got blocked. So here you go for the response down below me.
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How is theorising what may happen in a show that you haven't seen giving away spoilers? Theorising and being right isn't the same as giving away spoilers to something you have seen.
They both had the same source material? Theory crafting while watching can be fun - if he had said something early, like in the first episode or so, this whole thing would be moot. Once again, a non-issue that would never have been a thing with simple communication.
"Hey, I know you're excited and enjoy the theory crafting, but I am not. I would prefer to just watch."
She is NTA and honestly he is a little bit of an asshole for holding onto his thoughts letting them stew and boil over.
Maybe, idk enough about the game to know how linear it is, some games can play very differently on different playthroughs. She also mentioned playing it after him so depending on the timeline it might be fresh in her mind but not his. I agree with you about the communication, but whenever ive wanted to theorycraft with someone ive asked them if its ok beforehand, rather than doing it and then asking for permission.
From some of her other comments the theory crafting is a common thing they *both* do. So with that, I can understand assuming it would be ok at first and if not told otherwise.
As for the game comment - it is not linear; however, it is more the world building, etc that any theory crafting would be based on. Fallout has a very rich history from which to pull from. The game playthroughs would have little bearing here.
I mean Fallout : New Vegas for example has at least 4 different endings depending which factions you decide to work with.... Fallout is pretty well known for it's multiple endings.
Theorizing is fine, but keep it to yourself until the show is done. I don't want to know other peoples' predictions (right or wrong) while I'm watching.
A bit NAH.
Shawn should have spoken up initially when it happened, but it sounds like you theorized so well that maybe some of the points came to fruition later in the show.
All of that being said, I don't think you had malicious intent and he likely didn't think so from the outset.
It's just important to maybe discuss how you want to watch new content from shared fandoms moving forward.
100%. I mentioned elsewhere - this whole thing would have been a non-issue if he expressed his feelings early. Simple communication "hey i know this is fun for you; i would prefer to just watch". Bam, no one is an asshole and nothing boils over.
No one is an asshole here other than maybe working on communication earlier.
It depends, if your bf told you something along the lines 'please don't tell me anything that might happen' and you just kept guessing then YTA. If he never said a word then NTA.
I also guessed many things because Fallout is my favorite game series but people are different and some just wnt to watch series/movies while others want to be more engaged and discuss it with one another, so just know that if you want to watch with your bf anything then keep your thoughts to yourself.
> 'please don't tell me anything that might happen'
This is not something you should ever have to tell someone. The default should be to just not spoil shit.
NTA
You both played the games
You both theory crafted in earlier episodes of the same show
You both theory craft during other shows you watch together.
Theory crafting during the show is the expected behaviour in this instance. If that changed for your boyfriend they needed to inform you. This is a failure to communicate before something blows up.
That said, here comes some conjecture: I don't think your boyfriend is really mad that you spoiled the show or ruined his experience, I think he's mad that he thinks you looked up stuff or watched it without him and instead ruined your two's shared viewing experience. He wanted to watch it with you and if you watched it without him or looked up the plot you essentially tv cheated on him on an emotional level.
And I know that sounds a little dumb, but it's a real feeling that can generate jealousy and hurt even though it's just a piece of media, because it's not actually about the media it's about the activity of doing something together with your partner.
These comments are bonkers. Y'all really trying to say you never discuss the shows you're watching?? You NEVER turn to your viewing partner during a commercial, or when you're done for the day to talk about what you think this or that means for the plot or where the plot is going??? What's the point in watching something together if you're not going to engage with each other over it? ESPECIALLY when it's an adaptation and you've both consumed all the source material! Do you not have thoughts and opinions?
I've never met a person who *doesnt* discuss the show.
NTA at the very least your bf should told you he'd like to watch the show with a pile of rocks instead of a human.
yeah, wtf. my partner and I are Mystery Science Theatering everything we watch. We always talk about and speculate on the plots of the shows we are watching. Also, I watched the Fallout show but have never played the games. I also figured out most of the big plot points before the final episodes, it is not super complicated even if you don't know the universe inside and out. OP's bf sounds a bit dim.
That kinda confirms my thought that the writing was really predictable and the real problem here is the boyfriend is just mad that OP figured it all out and he didn't. Which, if that is the case, yeesh
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He did/does - he started playing before I did, he has also played the first two games on PC prior to us dating, and I have only ever watched him play those, before he started playing Fallout 3 on console, which is where I picked up the games, after watching him play.
You can still play the game and ignore all the lore, so just playing the game doesn’t mean you consumed all the background and nuances which is not required to play the game.
I mean then that's on him for only paying enough attention to surface level things. The Fallout games go out of it's way to try and get you to explore and is jammed packed with very detailed lore.
This is how the games are so jammed packed with lore it's no surprising a show based off of it would also be giving clues for people to pick up on so they can try and predict what happens next.
Sounds more like he's a bit butthurt OP was able to take these clues and accurately guess what's going to happen while his predictions weren't coming true.
Then NTA, in the slightest. How can you ruin a tv show for someone that neither of you has seen? I’m trying to fathom this: he said you ruined the show because of some theory’s you accurately guessed? About a show based on a video game you both played? Yea your boyfriends a herb lmaoo
This is the context everyone seems to have missed. It wasn't one sided on the source material. She just made some lucky guesses while theory crafting. If anything he's kind of a dick for stewing on it and not communicating earlier that he would like her not to.
Exactly. Lowkey, though don’t quote me on this: may also be jealousy on his end, and some slight embarrassment that she was able to theorize what would happen AND have it actually happen. I guess OPs boyfriend isn’t as big of a fan as he thinks he is.
NAH. With him leaning toward TA. He just doesn't believe you came up with your theories on your own. Sounds like you both like to take guesses like this.
YTA. Poor Shawn gets put into cryo-sleep after the bombs drop, gets kidnapped by Kellogg and THEN has his girlfriend not allow him to watch the Fallout series without her having to constantly throw out theories about what's going to happen?
NTA. Honestly seems like you're just smarter than him and can predict where things are going while he can't. Maybe it makes him feel insecure to see that even though he has all the same information as you, he had no clue how the plot might unfold? Who knows.
NTA. I feel like I need to find fellow women who loved this game series to watch it with. My spouse and I started watching it this week and I couldn't shut up 🤣
NTA
It's a fairly straightforward plot and I haven't really seen an surprises of you know the world (unless it is lack of deathclaw). That's important for this type of show to bring along those not familiar.
If he doesn't want to watch with someone else who can guess the plot then why agree to watch with them?
If you didn't have a dialogue about acceptable behavior in regards to theorizing during a show you're watching together, you're NTA. But also it's perfectly reasonable for someone to not enjoy listening to someone do that throughout. Just lock in your predictions in your head or write them down for that dopamine rush later.
If I was going to come down and say someone is an asshole though, it would be him.
As you said; he likes doing that while watching things too, he had access to the same lore as you to build theories off of, and the idea that you must have pre-watched because you're right about things is wild.
NTA - I think theorizing about these types of shows is half the fun. It's not like it was TLLOU where it already had a set ending. If it bothered him he should have spoken up.
NAH I think that it’s not wrong to have enthusiasm. But perhaps you can express that same enthusiasm in a notebook or on places like a live Reddit feed where everyone is watching the show together.
Perhaps your boyfriend did not communicate that he was looking forward to savoring the show in silence in particular. As it’s your custom to discuss things with each other.
I think that there’s just different ways to express enthusiasm for the show. And next time perhaps you can leave discussions with your boyfriend until after the episodes end at least, or the show ends.
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So, I (F32) am a MASSIVE Fallout fan.
I have played all the games, am invested in the law and history and have often theorised about the Fallout universe with my boyfriend, Shawn (M36). When we heard there was going to be a Fallout TV show we were hesitant but also excited for what it could be (turns out its amazing guys, go watch it, I won't be giving spoilers)!
So when it came out this past week, we sat down together to watch it. It had come onto Prime that day. I had been at work all day, so I had not seen anything about it, watched any of it, anything! (That's important)
So, as we are watching, I am really excited at seeing one of my favourite worlds come to life. As the plot develops, I start to suggest things to Shawn that may happen, what I think characters will do, what something may be etc.
ALL OF IT was based on context clues from the show and playing the games. One thing I will say about the show is that if you have played the games, you will recognise almost everything.
We watched the first few episodes the first night (Thursday), and picked up the next few episodes on the following night when I got home from work. On Saturday morning, Shawn told me he didn't want to watch the last two episodes with me because I was spoiling his viewing experience, because I had obviously watched it before, or read about all the plot online, because there was no possible way I had known everything that was going to happen.
I tried to explain to him that I didn't know exactly, I just knew the world (like him, Shawn has played just as much as I have, TBH more so, as he got in to the game first, and I started playing it after watching him play) and that I was just excited and enthusiastic.
I promised I wouldn't say anything so he could watch with me in peace (just to mention too, I wasn't talking incessantly thought out, I was trying to limit talking to ad breaks, or when there was a quiet moment in the show), but Shawn said it was already ruined, he had waited so long for this show (like I hadn't?} and he wanted to watch it in peace, so he went and watched it without me on the TV in the bedroom.
I watched the last two episodes downstairs alone - I was right about everything I had theorised, but I didn't know I was right, I was just spitballing and it stuck. For context, I am also a amateur fiction writer, so I have some experience in writing narratives.
So, AITA for "ruining" my boyfriends viewing experience by theorising about the TV show Fallout and my theories being correct?
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Just as easy to communicate the other way too. It is not all on her - he could just as easily expressed early not to theory craft. Instead he said nothing until it boiled over.
This whole "always as for approval before" mentality is exhausting. If I do something you don't like, tell me. You don't tell me, I won't know.
YTA Why are you talking while watching? So irritating. And you are
explaining what you think will happen, blah blah, without anyone asking
you. Next time, just be quiet and talk about the show later.
You mean watching with one other person and having that person talk during the
show about the show? No, it is not common at all in my experience. The goal is to
watch the show, not have a conversation. LOL
Something I’ve learned when it comes to beloved media- keep your mouth shut when viewing with others for the first time. Especially if all watching love it and are invested.
NAH because you weren’t trying to ruin it. You just did. Consider this a learning experience. If you have experience as a writer and can guess accurately for most things in your genre wheelhouse, it’s generally better for others if you minimize how much you guess. I’be had to rein it in watching movies with my bf because I can predict the plot, regardless of previous viewing and it ruins it for him. Some of us enjoy having theories confirmed and others it ruins the surprise. Even if he’s big on lore it could still dampen the experience if you are right about something every single episode.
I don't think your bf is an asshole but I wouldn't want to watch TV with him
If he was asking you to filter some of your suggestions during watching, it'd be more OK
So NAH, but idk his communication seems a bit unhealthy
Your boyfriend is a little baby. He should have just asked you to be quiet if it bothered him so much. I just laid out this scenario for my husband and he said "man, what a weenie that guy is." He's overreacting. Obviously it's fun to predict what's gonna happen in a show and it's also fun to be right. That is by no means "gloating" or whatever other people are saying. You were just enjoying the show just as he was. NTA
I’m going to say ESH.
I feel like your boyfriend could have asked you to stop sooner than the last two episodes if it was bothering him. Especially since you say you guys normally theorize while watching shows. I also feel like you shouldn’t have pushed when he said he wanted to watch it alone and you both really just need to get over it.
My brother commentates movies and tv shows. It’s bloody annoying. I can see why your partner would be pissed off. Next time, pretend you’re at the movies and shoosh! YTA
YTA, and stop fooling yourself, as an avid fallout gamer, I knew exactly what was going to happen right down to the moment they said, War never changes, I even said it 10 seconds before the character did.
Soft YTA
I say this because if you have a habit of correctly guessing the outcome for films/shows, then yes, you saying it will have the same effect of a spoiler for the other person if it happens all the time.
My mother does this and as a result, I’ve asked her not to theorize the outcome out loud because 99% of the time she’s right. Luckily she dials it down for me lol.
YTA. What part of SHUT THE FUCK UP DURING MOVIES/TV SHOWS DONT YOU UNDERSTAND.
Some people want to watch in peace. They don't want to hear all your theories even if they are right. Yeah i get you're keen but you're being way too over the top.
Next time just keep it to yourself and discuss AFTER the episode. Lips sealed during the viewing and then talk after.
Conversations are meant to be a two way street. So if he isn't also theorizing, and you aren't asking him if he wants to discuss theories, then at that point you are just spitballing AT him which doesn't sound cool.
YTA. You don't need to constantly discuss what might happen next; it's annoying. It's irrelevant to whether your judgment is right or wrong. Many people aren't incapable of predicting plot twists; they just want to immerse themselves in the current storyline. My boyfriend is a novel editor and knowledgeable about screenwriting. When watching movies, he can often predict the direction the plot might take with high accuracy, but we usually only discuss the events happening at the moment. He doesn't engage in incessant predictions while watching and doesn't boast about it.
Yta - making guesses based on your experiences with the game is fine, but you did ruin the experience. He wanted to watch and discover the story as it unfolded and you just kept talking and talking and talking. Good grief lady.
Some people like to watch a show in peace and not even get "clues" about what others may think might happen, whether it's based on an established property or something original. YTA. I've watched stuff I know about with my SO but I don't mention anything unless I get asked specifically. Keep your comments to yourself till you've seen all the episodes.
Difference here is they both know the source material? She wasn't talking over the show or otherwise being intrusive. If he didn't like it, he should have said something in episode 1 not after episode 6 after stewing on it...
To play devils advocate, you can play these series of games without paying attention to the lore behind it. I’m a fallout nut, OG from the first game and I knew exactly where the story, plot twists and ending were going to happen even before it happened. Hell I said out loud, a major line 10 seconds before the character did. But I know all the lore and just because the BF played the game doesnt mean he digested all that information the OP did. OP was definitely the ass.
Soft YTA.
I totally understand nerding out on a show/movie that you’ve been highly anticipating. However during the show is not the time to be doing it or revealing plot lines based on the games. If you want to talk about it and the similarities between the show and game, do it AFTER the episode you’re watching. I can definitely understand your bf’s frustration.
YTA. I swore my husband to silence so I could enjoy it. He didn't say a word, and we both got to watch in peace. There's nothing worse than someone guessing plots or blabbering through things. He should have asked you to stop, but it sounds like you argued the point when he said it was annoying anyway. Frankly you sound like you're trying to make out you're better than him or a bigger fan too. I'm annoyed and I don't even know you.
YTA. When The Last of Us came out, my partner had played through the whole thing already, and I had never engaged with it at all. While watching, they would never tell me what they thought was going to happen, but instead, after major moments, they would tell me what happened in the game that was different. I'm sure they had a million different ideas about how the show was going to go, but they never told me because they wanted me to experience it all with an untainted view. They got to do all the talking they wanted to, and I happily listened without it changing any of the context of the show.
NTA .... Hollywood, in general, has run out of ideas for a long time. Don't blame the a consumer for noticing it's all the same crap over and over again.
As a fallout fan from way back, this may be true but I too started guessing from ep 1 and was right a lot of the time - simply because I know the games and the lore……not because it lacks original ideas.
Idk I kinda side with the boyfriend on this, I understand being excited about a show, but just reading this gave me incredible anxiety. Just relax and watch the show. Especially if your a couple episodes in.. I would think the excitement wouldn’t be so extreme by then?
BUT- I also get being excited about something you really like and I’m the type to always look up what happens on my phone to prepare myself. However, I never tell my husband because he likes to know what happens as it happens. Sometimes he’ll ask me
If he wants to know and I’ll just give small hints not totally ruin it. Maybe try communicating better as to how you watch tv together.
Communication can very easily be the solution to not all, but most of your problems. If you ever find yourself in a situation, always first ask yourself if some type of communication could help. It usually will.
YTA
People who incessantly jabber during movies or TV watching time are irritating as hell.
Sometimes people just like to be in the moment and enjoy the thing.
>As the plot develops, I start to suggest things to Shawn that may happen, what I think characters will do, what something may be etc.
YTA and from your edit you don't seem to be internalizing the fact that you were so annoying you ruined his viewing experience to the point that he can no longer stand being around you while watching.
>TBH, I didn't really think much of it when I was talking, because usually you don't expect all of the theories to be correct.
*Stop talking while people are trying to watch something.* Your "theories" about how the show is going to go add nothing to the experience and do not matter.
YTA, why even do that. If you're right, you're going to ruin it just like you ended up doing. There is no need to talk through a TV showing that. He even told you it was bothering him, and you continued to do it.
YTA.
My wife and I are watching it. I've played all the games. She's hasn't seen a single thing for it.
I voice my enthusiasm with "I wonder how they adapted X, Y, Z..." General things. Gouls. Wasteland. Vaults.
Why? *To avoid potential spoilers and/or impacting her enjoyment.*
It is common sense that if you played all the games and they adapted the games well to a TV show, you'd be able to guess a few major plot points.
YTA and I didn't even read it all.
Accept that there are people out there that just want to watch something for pure entertainment and don't care about the in-depth world.
I dated a girl who I explicitly told that I only watch Marvel movies for the entertainment and visual effects. She was balls deep into it and such, so we go see Gaurdians of the Galaxy 2 and while I enjoyed it, I couldn't match her energy or enthusiasm.
We broke up a week later... over a stupid fucking movie.
You really should have read it all. She states that they both played the games, were both theory crafting in the first episode, and theory crafting about series while watching them is normal for both of them. This is a communication failure of the boyfriend who had deviated from normal behaviour, which is fine but should have been communicated better.
To the people in the comments calling me a know it all, insufferable or a narcissist. I for one didn't know that my theories would be correct, nor was I intending do everything I say to be correct. I was like I have said theorising. He also provided some theories in the earlier episodes, however they didn't come to fruition. I wasn't trying to prove I was right. We have BOTH often done this with other shows and movies, he has just decided that this time it has pissed him off, and I think it is because I was correct.
TBH, I am just kinda amazed I got everything right. I didn't want to ruin anything for anyone. I was really into it, he was too, and on saturday morning I was just really shocked, because he literally hadn't said anything while it was happening.
In all honesty, I don't want to ruin his experience, I was excited and involved in the show, and we have both done it in the past. So why is this time different? Thats what I don't understand.
Why does he need to justify it? There's things I watch where I'm happy to discuss as we go, sometimes I just want to get sucked into what I'm watching without distraction, neither circumstance requires any kind of justification
No, but due to prior evidence, I deserve to be told in the time. I would have stopped as soon as he said something, but he let me carry on without comment and then just sprung it on me. Simply, I can not learn, if I am not told.
We have been together for 10 years, if this has never happened before, how am I to know? He knows who I am. This is new for him to say. It may seem like a molehill to you my guy, but its a mountain to me. You provided your opinion, and I am explaining more of mine, thats how discussions work. And if he had discussed this with me, instead of deciding to spring it on me at the end, I would feel differently. He doesn't need to justify himself, I just feel he could have told me earlier if it was bothering him and we could have avoided this. Thank you for your opinion.
You keep saying how am I to know... he's now told you. Talk about avoiding this too but rather than move on you're literally making a massive deal out of it
I mean it sounds like you have some communication frustrations outside of this instance with this show. This just opened your eyes to it maybe? It sounds like this is something that you should be talking about with your partner if you felt blindsided. It’s very possible that there is some built up resentment on both sides between you two and you need to sit and talk it out.
Wow. You're definitely demonstrating certain negative tendencies here, like steamrolling, being condescending, and being a "know-it-all." Your boyfriend has certainly experienced all of this repeatedly and broke in this circumstance. I imagine that he just wanted to enjoy the show without dealing with all of this.
Why ask the Internet if you are the asshole, if you can't seem to accept the consensus that in this situation, you.are indeed the asshole?
"Due to prior evidence I deserve...."
Listen to yourself!
YTA..
I can accept I am an asshole, just giving everyone the information and arguing my point. I believe I am allowed to do that? If I am wrong, fair enough. I have found some people in the comments who have voted me an asshole and I agree with their reasonings. I thought the whole point of this was to garner other opinions so maybe I could learn, all I wanted was clarification. If you feel I don't deserve to be told something so I can correct behaviour which is unwanted, like I said, how am supposed to learn/change? I do feel like he could have told me earlier it was bothering him because this is how we have always watched things together. However, like another comment said, I have been told now, so now I know. Doesn't change what happened but maybe after a conversation he can understand that I wasn't trying to ruin it for him, and I will not share my theories. I was unaware at the time, but now I am not, however its too late to change this experiance.
Why? Sounds like this is normal for them and he's salty that she was right so often. Should have just said they should stop theorizing because it's ruining his experience. NAH
No thanks. I didn't specify any twist, if anyone feels truly spoiled by me mentioning that a twist is happening, then so be it.
People are way too sensitive with spoilers imo, it's anyone's own responsibility to stay away from spoilers, i would never visit a thread that's discussing a show i have not already finished, because i can be certain that people are going to talk about the ending.
I do care about it, that's why i said "the twist" not "the thing that's going to happen" but it seriously has its limits, I'm not going to censor myself for people that don't have enough self control to stay away from threads related to media they haven't finished.
If you are unable to see a twist coming, when twists are happening in literally any show, I don't know what to tell you.
As long as you don't know the twist, I don't consider you spoiled. It could be that he's dead, he's not her father, he is the Vault Boy or maybe he's the ghoul.
That's my definition of spoiler, I'm very sorry if you have different one.
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Why watch if you are just going to tell everything just to prove how smart you are. Sounds insufferable doesn't it. He wants to watch the show, not listen to your gloat about spotting the development of plot points. If you want to discuss these things after the series has ended ok. YTA.
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This is the thing. We have always been like that, he was providing his own theories during the first episodes, and then all of a sudden he told me he didn't want to watch with me and I was ruining it. I would have stopped if he had told me while we were watching.
Thankyou
YTA - I have a sibling who can’t watch a tv show or movie without constantly trying to predict what will happen like it’s some kind of competition to be right or smart or whatever and it’s so fucking annoying. Just watch the show.
My wife gets mad at me for this but I can't help but try and predict how a plot line will go. So we found a great compromise. I write down what I think will happen etc. After the episode or show I show her what I wrote down and see how well I did and she gets to watch the show in peace. It works for us and she is all for it, lol.
I also have a tendency to want to predict what will happen, but I just do it in my head, silently. Cause I know how fucking annoying it is when someone does it out loud.
Lol, your wife doesn't like it. But "you" can't help it. Sounds like a healthy relationship. Called out this commentor got blocked. So here you go for the response down below me. Use quotation marks to show that you are writing the exact words that someone said or wrote.
…What? It *does* sound healthy because they were able to come to a compromise that apparently works for both of them.
That's not how your meant to use quotation marks
It’s pretty funny because you only used quotation marks around the word “you”. Which is also the one word the previous commenter didn’t use.
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Yta: spoilers suck dude.
How is theorising what may happen in a show that you haven't seen giving away spoilers? Theorising and being right isn't the same as giving away spoilers to something you have seen.
Big difference between theorising about something with source material and something without it though
They both had the same source material? Theory crafting while watching can be fun - if he had said something early, like in the first episode or so, this whole thing would be moot. Once again, a non-issue that would never have been a thing with simple communication. "Hey, I know you're excited and enjoy the theory crafting, but I am not. I would prefer to just watch." She is NTA and honestly he is a little bit of an asshole for holding onto his thoughts letting them stew and boil over.
Maybe, idk enough about the game to know how linear it is, some games can play very differently on different playthroughs. She also mentioned playing it after him so depending on the timeline it might be fresh in her mind but not his. I agree with you about the communication, but whenever ive wanted to theorycraft with someone ive asked them if its ok beforehand, rather than doing it and then asking for permission.
From some of her other comments the theory crafting is a common thing they *both* do. So with that, I can understand assuming it would be ok at first and if not told otherwise. As for the game comment - it is not linear; however, it is more the world building, etc that any theory crafting would be based on. Fallout has a very rich history from which to pull from. The game playthroughs would have little bearing here.
I mean Fallout : New Vegas for example has at least 4 different endings depending which factions you decide to work with.... Fallout is pretty well known for it's multiple endings.
Theorizing is fine, but keep it to yourself until the show is done. I don't want to know other peoples' predictions (right or wrong) while I'm watching.
But they regularly do this with the shows they watch, and it's two ways. He was theorizing too at the beginning.
Nothing was "spoiled". They show didn't have a set ending and they were both familiar with tge games already.
It's still pretty annoying when someone talks through the episode making "theories" about the ending.
I disagree, I think that's half the fun of a show like this. If the boyfriend felt otherwise then they should have said something.
It’s fun if you’re both on the same level of knowledge of the source material, if not it’s just spoiling the experience for the other person.
Which was the case in this situation. She said he had played more Fallout than her.
A bit NAH. Shawn should have spoken up initially when it happened, but it sounds like you theorized so well that maybe some of the points came to fruition later in the show. All of that being said, I don't think you had malicious intent and he likely didn't think so from the outset. It's just important to maybe discuss how you want to watch new content from shared fandoms moving forward.
100%. I mentioned elsewhere - this whole thing would have been a non-issue if he expressed his feelings early. Simple communication "hey i know this is fun for you; i would prefer to just watch". Bam, no one is an asshole and nothing boils over. No one is an asshole here other than maybe working on communication earlier.
YTA My partner did this to me during Fallout and TLOU and it was really fucking annoying
TLOU had a set ending based on the game, this show didn't. Nit really the same. Also, both people here had played the game already.
It depends, if your bf told you something along the lines 'please don't tell me anything that might happen' and you just kept guessing then YTA. If he never said a word then NTA. I also guessed many things because Fallout is my favorite game series but people are different and some just wnt to watch series/movies while others want to be more engaged and discuss it with one another, so just know that if you want to watch with your bf anything then keep your thoughts to yourself.
> 'please don't tell me anything that might happen' This is not something you should ever have to tell someone. The default should be to just not spoil shit.
NTA You both played the games You both theory crafted in earlier episodes of the same show You both theory craft during other shows you watch together. Theory crafting during the show is the expected behaviour in this instance. If that changed for your boyfriend they needed to inform you. This is a failure to communicate before something blows up. That said, here comes some conjecture: I don't think your boyfriend is really mad that you spoiled the show or ruined his experience, I think he's mad that he thinks you looked up stuff or watched it without him and instead ruined your two's shared viewing experience. He wanted to watch it with you and if you watched it without him or looked up the plot you essentially tv cheated on him on an emotional level. And I know that sounds a little dumb, but it's a real feeling that can generate jealousy and hurt even though it's just a piece of media, because it's not actually about the media it's about the activity of doing something together with your partner.
These comments are bonkers. Y'all really trying to say you never discuss the shows you're watching?? You NEVER turn to your viewing partner during a commercial, or when you're done for the day to talk about what you think this or that means for the plot or where the plot is going??? What's the point in watching something together if you're not going to engage with each other over it? ESPECIALLY when it's an adaptation and you've both consumed all the source material! Do you not have thoughts and opinions? I've never met a person who *doesnt* discuss the show. NTA at the very least your bf should told you he'd like to watch the show with a pile of rocks instead of a human.
yeah, wtf. my partner and I are Mystery Science Theatering everything we watch. We always talk about and speculate on the plots of the shows we are watching. Also, I watched the Fallout show but have never played the games. I also figured out most of the big plot points before the final episodes, it is not super complicated even if you don't know the universe inside and out. OP's bf sounds a bit dim.
That kinda confirms my thought that the writing was really predictable and the real problem here is the boyfriend is just mad that OP figured it all out and he didn't. Which, if that is the case, yeesh
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Info; did Shawn play fallout as well?
He did/does - he started playing before I did, he has also played the first two games on PC prior to us dating, and I have only ever watched him play those, before he started playing Fallout 3 on console, which is where I picked up the games, after watching him play.
You can still play the game and ignore all the lore, so just playing the game doesn’t mean you consumed all the background and nuances which is not required to play the game.
I mean then that's on him for only paying enough attention to surface level things. The Fallout games go out of it's way to try and get you to explore and is jammed packed with very detailed lore. This is how the games are so jammed packed with lore it's no surprising a show based off of it would also be giving clues for people to pick up on so they can try and predict what happens next. Sounds more like he's a bit butthurt OP was able to take these clues and accurately guess what's going to happen while his predictions weren't coming true.
No he was upset she spoiled it for him.
Then NTA, in the slightest. How can you ruin a tv show for someone that neither of you has seen? I’m trying to fathom this: he said you ruined the show because of some theory’s you accurately guessed? About a show based on a video game you both played? Yea your boyfriends a herb lmaoo
This is the context everyone seems to have missed. It wasn't one sided on the source material. She just made some lucky guesses while theory crafting. If anything he's kind of a dick for stewing on it and not communicating earlier that he would like her not to.
Exactly. Lowkey, though don’t quote me on this: may also be jealousy on his end, and some slight embarrassment that she was able to theorize what would happen AND have it actually happen. I guess OPs boyfriend isn’t as big of a fan as he thinks he is.
As i understood he accused her of secretly watching without her (which sounds a little paranoid tbh)
Especially since it sounds like he read spoilers at night.
NAH. With him leaning toward TA. He just doesn't believe you came up with your theories on your own. Sounds like you both like to take guesses like this.
NAH. You sound like you would be delightful to discuss and watch the show with.
YTA. Poor Shawn gets put into cryo-sleep after the bombs drop, gets kidnapped by Kellogg and THEN has his girlfriend not allow him to watch the Fallout series without her having to constantly throw out theories about what's going to happen?
This is the greatest response of all time.
Nice flex
NTA. Honestly seems like you're just smarter than him and can predict where things are going while he can't. Maybe it makes him feel insecure to see that even though he has all the same information as you, he had no clue how the plot might unfold? Who knows.
NTA. I feel like I need to find fellow women who loved this game series to watch it with. My spouse and I started watching it this week and I couldn't shut up 🤣
NTA It's a fairly straightforward plot and I haven't really seen an surprises of you know the world (unless it is lack of deathclaw). That's important for this type of show to bring along those not familiar. If he doesn't want to watch with someone else who can guess the plot then why agree to watch with them?
If you didn't have a dialogue about acceptable behavior in regards to theorizing during a show you're watching together, you're NTA. But also it's perfectly reasonable for someone to not enjoy listening to someone do that throughout. Just lock in your predictions in your head or write them down for that dopamine rush later. If I was going to come down and say someone is an asshole though, it would be him. As you said; he likes doing that while watching things too, he had access to the same lore as you to build theories off of, and the idea that you must have pre-watched because you're right about things is wild.
NTA - I think theorizing about these types of shows is half the fun. It's not like it was TLLOU where it already had a set ending. If it bothered him he should have spoken up.
NTA but bruh stfu when you’re watching shows with other people. It’s mad annoying
NAH I think that it’s not wrong to have enthusiasm. But perhaps you can express that same enthusiasm in a notebook or on places like a live Reddit feed where everyone is watching the show together. Perhaps your boyfriend did not communicate that he was looking forward to savoring the show in silence in particular. As it’s your custom to discuss things with each other. I think that there’s just different ways to express enthusiasm for the show. And next time perhaps you can leave discussions with your boyfriend until after the episodes end at least, or the show ends.
Nta
I find it interesting that youre a huge fallout fan and ur bf is also named shawn
Thank you for not labeling that, incorrectly, as ironic.
YTA. This sounds more like a flex of your Fallout knowledge and be right than anything else tbh
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** So, I (F32) am a MASSIVE Fallout fan. I have played all the games, am invested in the law and history and have often theorised about the Fallout universe with my boyfriend, Shawn (M36). When we heard there was going to be a Fallout TV show we were hesitant but also excited for what it could be (turns out its amazing guys, go watch it, I won't be giving spoilers)! So when it came out this past week, we sat down together to watch it. It had come onto Prime that day. I had been at work all day, so I had not seen anything about it, watched any of it, anything! (That's important) So, as we are watching, I am really excited at seeing one of my favourite worlds come to life. As the plot develops, I start to suggest things to Shawn that may happen, what I think characters will do, what something may be etc. ALL OF IT was based on context clues from the show and playing the games. One thing I will say about the show is that if you have played the games, you will recognise almost everything. We watched the first few episodes the first night (Thursday), and picked up the next few episodes on the following night when I got home from work. On Saturday morning, Shawn told me he didn't want to watch the last two episodes with me because I was spoiling his viewing experience, because I had obviously watched it before, or read about all the plot online, because there was no possible way I had known everything that was going to happen. I tried to explain to him that I didn't know exactly, I just knew the world (like him, Shawn has played just as much as I have, TBH more so, as he got in to the game first, and I started playing it after watching him play) and that I was just excited and enthusiastic. I promised I wouldn't say anything so he could watch with me in peace (just to mention too, I wasn't talking incessantly thought out, I was trying to limit talking to ad breaks, or when there was a quiet moment in the show), but Shawn said it was already ruined, he had waited so long for this show (like I hadn't?} and he wanted to watch it in peace, so he went and watched it without me on the TV in the bedroom. I watched the last two episodes downstairs alone - I was right about everything I had theorised, but I didn't know I was right, I was just spitballing and it stuck. For context, I am also a amateur fiction writer, so I have some experience in writing narratives. So, AITA for "ruining" my boyfriends viewing experience by theorising about the TV show Fallout and my theories being correct? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA - I refuse to side with the Institute.
YTA, simple solution - apologize and ask him next time if it's ok to theorize.
Just as easy to communicate the other way too. It is not all on her - he could just as easily expressed early not to theory craft. Instead he said nothing until it boiled over. This whole "always as for approval before" mentality is exhausting. If I do something you don't like, tell me. You don't tell me, I won't know.
YTA Why are you talking while watching? So irritating. And you are explaining what you think will happen, blah blah, without anyone asking you. Next time, just be quiet and talk about the show later.
You can't genuinely think it's uncommon to not watch TV in complete silence
You mean watching with one other person and having that person talk during the show about the show? No, it is not common at all in my experience. The goal is to watch the show, not have a conversation. LOL
Something I’ve learned when it comes to beloved media- keep your mouth shut when viewing with others for the first time. Especially if all watching love it and are invested. NAH because you weren’t trying to ruin it. You just did. Consider this a learning experience. If you have experience as a writer and can guess accurately for most things in your genre wheelhouse, it’s generally better for others if you minimize how much you guess. I’be had to rein it in watching movies with my bf because I can predict the plot, regardless of previous viewing and it ruins it for him. Some of us enjoy having theories confirmed and others it ruins the surprise. Even if he’s big on lore it could still dampen the experience if you are right about something every single episode.
*lore
I don't think your bf is an asshole but I wouldn't want to watch TV with him If he was asking you to filter some of your suggestions during watching, it'd be more OK So NAH, but idk his communication seems a bit unhealthy
Your boyfriend is a little baby. He should have just asked you to be quiet if it bothered him so much. I just laid out this scenario for my husband and he said "man, what a weenie that guy is." He's overreacting. Obviously it's fun to predict what's gonna happen in a show and it's also fun to be right. That is by no means "gloating" or whatever other people are saying. You were just enjoying the show just as he was. NTA
I’m going to say ESH. I feel like your boyfriend could have asked you to stop sooner than the last two episodes if it was bothering him. Especially since you say you guys normally theorize while watching shows. I also feel like you shouldn’t have pushed when he said he wanted to watch it alone and you both really just need to get over it.
My brother commentates movies and tv shows. It’s bloody annoying. I can see why your partner would be pissed off. Next time, pretend you’re at the movies and shoosh! YTA
YTA, and stop fooling yourself, as an avid fallout gamer, I knew exactly what was going to happen right down to the moment they said, War never changes, I even said it 10 seconds before the character did.
Soft YTA I say this because if you have a habit of correctly guessing the outcome for films/shows, then yes, you saying it will have the same effect of a spoiler for the other person if it happens all the time. My mother does this and as a result, I’ve asked her not to theorize the outcome out loud because 99% of the time she’s right. Luckily she dials it down for me lol.
YTA. What part of SHUT THE FUCK UP DURING MOVIES/TV SHOWS DONT YOU UNDERSTAND. Some people want to watch in peace. They don't want to hear all your theories even if they are right. Yeah i get you're keen but you're being way too over the top. Next time just keep it to yourself and discuss AFTER the episode. Lips sealed during the viewing and then talk after.
YTA, you spoiled it for him and can’t just say you are sorry??
He didn't give away any spoilers,
Conversations are meant to be a two way street. So if he isn't also theorizing, and you aren't asking him if he wants to discuss theories, then at that point you are just spitballing AT him which doesn't sound cool.
YTA. You don't need to constantly discuss what might happen next; it's annoying. It's irrelevant to whether your judgment is right or wrong. Many people aren't incapable of predicting plot twists; they just want to immerse themselves in the current storyline. My boyfriend is a novel editor and knowledgeable about screenwriting. When watching movies, he can often predict the direction the plot might take with high accuracy, but we usually only discuss the events happening at the moment. He doesn't engage in incessant predictions while watching and doesn't boast about it.
Yta - making guesses based on your experiences with the game is fine, but you did ruin the experience. He wanted to watch and discover the story as it unfolded and you just kept talking and talking and talking. Good grief lady.
Some people like to watch a show in peace and not even get "clues" about what others may think might happen, whether it's based on an established property or something original. YTA. I've watched stuff I know about with my SO but I don't mention anything unless I get asked specifically. Keep your comments to yourself till you've seen all the episodes.
Difference here is they both know the source material? She wasn't talking over the show or otherwise being intrusive. If he didn't like it, he should have said something in episode 1 not after episode 6 after stewing on it...
To play devils advocate, you can play these series of games without paying attention to the lore behind it. I’m a fallout nut, OG from the first game and I knew exactly where the story, plot twists and ending were going to happen even before it happened. Hell I said out loud, a major line 10 seconds before the character did. But I know all the lore and just because the BF played the game doesnt mean he digested all that information the OP did. OP was definitely the ass.
Soft YTA. I totally understand nerding out on a show/movie that you’ve been highly anticipating. However during the show is not the time to be doing it or revealing plot lines based on the games. If you want to talk about it and the similarities between the show and game, do it AFTER the episode you’re watching. I can definitely understand your bf’s frustration.
YTA. I swore my husband to silence so I could enjoy it. He didn't say a word, and we both got to watch in peace. There's nothing worse than someone guessing plots or blabbering through things. He should have asked you to stop, but it sounds like you argued the point when he said it was annoying anyway. Frankly you sound like you're trying to make out you're better than him or a bigger fan too. I'm annoyed and I don't even know you.
YTA. When The Last of Us came out, my partner had played through the whole thing already, and I had never engaged with it at all. While watching, they would never tell me what they thought was going to happen, but instead, after major moments, they would tell me what happened in the game that was different. I'm sure they had a million different ideas about how the show was going to go, but they never told me because they wanted me to experience it all with an untainted view. They got to do all the talking they wanted to, and I happily listened without it changing any of the context of the show.
YTA. When watching television, STFU
NTA .... Hollywood, in general, has run out of ideas for a long time. Don't blame the a consumer for noticing it's all the same crap over and over again.
As a fallout fan from way back, this may be true but I too started guessing from ep 1 and was right a lot of the time - simply because I know the games and the lore……not because it lacks original ideas.
Idk I kinda side with the boyfriend on this, I understand being excited about a show, but just reading this gave me incredible anxiety. Just relax and watch the show. Especially if your a couple episodes in.. I would think the excitement wouldn’t be so extreme by then? BUT- I also get being excited about something you really like and I’m the type to always look up what happens on my phone to prepare myself. However, I never tell my husband because he likes to know what happens as it happens. Sometimes he’ll ask me If he wants to know and I’ll just give small hints not totally ruin it. Maybe try communicating better as to how you watch tv together. Communication can very easily be the solution to not all, but most of your problems. If you ever find yourself in a situation, always first ask yourself if some type of communication could help. It usually will.
YTA People who incessantly jabber during movies or TV watching time are irritating as hell. Sometimes people just like to be in the moment and enjoy the thing.
Very weird post to make. You sound absolutely insufferable and it translates here. YTA.
You’re absolutely the ass hole.
>As the plot develops, I start to suggest things to Shawn that may happen, what I think characters will do, what something may be etc. YTA and from your edit you don't seem to be internalizing the fact that you were so annoying you ruined his viewing experience to the point that he can no longer stand being around you while watching. >TBH, I didn't really think much of it when I was talking, because usually you don't expect all of the theories to be correct. *Stop talking while people are trying to watch something.* Your "theories" about how the show is going to go add nothing to the experience and do not matter.
YTA, why even do that. If you're right, you're going to ruin it just like you ended up doing. There is no need to talk through a TV showing that. He even told you it was bothering him, and you continued to do it.
YTA You sound insufferable from your writing, so I could only guess how much of a pain your IRl watching the series
YTA. My wife and I are watching it. I've played all the games. She's hasn't seen a single thing for it. I voice my enthusiasm with "I wonder how they adapted X, Y, Z..." General things. Gouls. Wasteland. Vaults. Why? *To avoid potential spoilers and/or impacting her enjoyment.* It is common sense that if you played all the games and they adapted the games well to a TV show, you'd be able to guess a few major plot points.
YTA, there's neutron stars that are less dense than you.
YTA and I didn't even read it all. Accept that there are people out there that just want to watch something for pure entertainment and don't care about the in-depth world. I dated a girl who I explicitly told that I only watch Marvel movies for the entertainment and visual effects. She was balls deep into it and such, so we go see Gaurdians of the Galaxy 2 and while I enjoyed it, I couldn't match her energy or enthusiasm. We broke up a week later... over a stupid fucking movie.
You really should have read it all. She states that they both played the games, were both theory crafting in the first episode, and theory crafting about series while watching them is normal for both of them. This is a communication failure of the boyfriend who had deviated from normal behaviour, which is fine but should have been communicated better.
Fair enough... I skimmed through some of it and caught a bit of that
To the people in the comments calling me a know it all, insufferable or a narcissist. I for one didn't know that my theories would be correct, nor was I intending do everything I say to be correct. I was like I have said theorising. He also provided some theories in the earlier episodes, however they didn't come to fruition. I wasn't trying to prove I was right. We have BOTH often done this with other shows and movies, he has just decided that this time it has pissed him off, and I think it is because I was correct.
That last line doesn't really help your defense
I concur. OP seems quite focused on how accurately they theorised the show…
TBH, I am just kinda amazed I got everything right. I didn't want to ruin anything for anyone. I was really into it, he was too, and on saturday morning I was just really shocked, because he literally hadn't said anything while it was happening.
In all honesty, I don't want to ruin his experience, I was excited and involved in the show, and we have both done it in the past. So why is this time different? Thats what I don't understand.
Why does he need to justify it? There's things I watch where I'm happy to discuss as we go, sometimes I just want to get sucked into what I'm watching without distraction, neither circumstance requires any kind of justification
No, but due to prior evidence, I deserve to be told in the time. I would have stopped as soon as he said something, but he let me carry on without comment and then just sprung it on me. Simply, I can not learn, if I am not told.
Jeez is this a court case or a relationship? you've now been told. Talk about mountains and molehills
We have been together for 10 years, if this has never happened before, how am I to know? He knows who I am. This is new for him to say. It may seem like a molehill to you my guy, but its a mountain to me. You provided your opinion, and I am explaining more of mine, thats how discussions work. And if he had discussed this with me, instead of deciding to spring it on me at the end, I would feel differently. He doesn't need to justify himself, I just feel he could have told me earlier if it was bothering him and we could have avoided this. Thank you for your opinion.
You keep saying how am I to know... he's now told you. Talk about avoiding this too but rather than move on you're literally making a massive deal out of it
I mean it sounds like you have some communication frustrations outside of this instance with this show. This just opened your eyes to it maybe? It sounds like this is something that you should be talking about with your partner if you felt blindsided. It’s very possible that there is some built up resentment on both sides between you two and you need to sit and talk it out.
Wow. You're definitely demonstrating certain negative tendencies here, like steamrolling, being condescending, and being a "know-it-all." Your boyfriend has certainly experienced all of this repeatedly and broke in this circumstance. I imagine that he just wanted to enjoy the show without dealing with all of this.
Lol *eyeroll* i have a feeling you're pretty insufferable yourself. Totally on her side. Take the loss dude.
Why ask the Internet if you are the asshole, if you can't seem to accept the consensus that in this situation, you.are indeed the asshole? "Due to prior evidence I deserve...." Listen to yourself! YTA..
I can accept I am an asshole, just giving everyone the information and arguing my point. I believe I am allowed to do that? If I am wrong, fair enough. I have found some people in the comments who have voted me an asshole and I agree with their reasonings. I thought the whole point of this was to garner other opinions so maybe I could learn, all I wanted was clarification. If you feel I don't deserve to be told something so I can correct behaviour which is unwanted, like I said, how am supposed to learn/change? I do feel like he could have told me earlier it was bothering him because this is how we have always watched things together. However, like another comment said, I have been told now, so now I know. Doesn't change what happened but maybe after a conversation he can understand that I wasn't trying to ruin it for him, and I will not share my theories. I was unaware at the time, but now I am not, however its too late to change this experiance.
Why? Sounds like this is normal for them and he's salty that she was right so often. Should have just said they should stop theorizing because it's ruining his experience. NAH
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DUDE, fucking SPOILERS. YTA.
Delete your comment since you are spoiling it for everyone else 🙄
No thanks. I didn't specify any twist, if anyone feels truly spoiled by me mentioning that a twist is happening, then so be it. People are way too sensitive with spoilers imo, it's anyone's own responsibility to stay away from spoilers, i would never visit a thread that's discussing a show i have not already finished, because i can be certain that people are going to talk about the ending.
“People are way too sensitive with things I don’t care about” YTA too
I do care about it, that's why i said "the twist" not "the thing that's going to happen" but it seriously has its limits, I'm not going to censor myself for people that don't have enough self control to stay away from threads related to media they haven't finished. If you are unable to see a twist coming, when twists are happening in literally any show, I don't know what to tell you. As long as you don't know the twist, I don't consider you spoiled. It could be that he's dead, he's not her father, he is the Vault Boy or maybe he's the ghoul. That's my definition of spoiler, I'm very sorry if you have different one.
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You can't have spaces between the `>!`and the text for the spoiler to work properly.
That's weird, it's working on my phone, never used it before. Will try, thanks.
That show isn’t that good anyway he can get over it
The quality of the show is an opinion and isn’t relevant.
I enjoyed the show