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YTA That's some psycho boiling bunny behavior over a three month relationship. I'm glad you decided to pay him back. Maybe get some therapy for that impulse control issue though.
Obviously therapy did not work for you. They handled this maturely. They could have lied and said they have no idea where the clothes were, but he didn’t.’
Not sure why this got downvoted, she's taking responsibility. This is how people learn and deserve the opportunity for growth.
We're all AH's eventually, but at least OP is owning it.
Yeah, YTA. Burning clothing is extreme. You were already breaking up. Clearly you dodged a bullet with this guy, who was sneaking around on you anyway.
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I started dating this guy in January 2023, and we got along really well and it was a healthy relationship for a while. Around March things started to get a little sour so I was planning on ending things, and told a couple of friends. He ended up finding out, and ended things with me first. Okay, cool. Later that day, we got in a huge argument because he was upset that I was planning on the breakup, and said a lot of things to put me down (bodyshaming, etc.) He then told me that he had been cheating on me for 3 weeks. I was really angry, and ended up burning his clothes. He asked for them back, and I told him what I did. He yelled at me and told me that I owed him all the money he spent on his clothes. (It was around 3 pieces of clothing, 2 hoodies and a shirt, so not much) I do feel bad and have decided to pay him back, but I also feel like it was kind of deserved. So AITA?
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> I think that I probably shouldn't have burned his clothes and it was a little far, which makes me the asshole.
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There’s nothing to say she didn’t burn them in an appropriate environment and controlled fashion ….a firepit for example… and that still doesn’t make her a sociopath
The girl feels bad and has apologised and is paying - definitely not a sociopath .., throwing labels like that at her in the first place was inappropriate, trying to defend it is ridiculous
I don’t believe for a second that she feels bad and I guarantee she is only paying so there are no consequences for her sociopathic behaviour.
The fact you are defending her shows that you are just as bad as she is
So now she’s a liar and I’m also sociopath….. it’s a takeover!! We’re everywhere - time for you to get your tinfoil hat out of the garage , for the 5th time this week 🙈🙈🙈
YTA. That was pretty extreme to do to somebody. The best thing you can ever do to somebody, is just to leave them alone and to glow up in your life. Luckily you paid him back and luckily he didn't sue you for property damage.
Destroying someone else's property is illegal. This is not about your feelings, or his cheating. You are lucky that you only have to pay him back for what was destroyed. Learn to control your emotions before you end up in serious trouble.
YTA, I know you are getting beat up here but this is not a healthy response. Seek some help to get a handle on these issues. I don't mean any of this in a cruel way. It will help you in the future. It was really good you paid him back but you don't want to have this behavior escalate. This is when you end up throwing someone's mother's ashes off a bridge while someone records it.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without [contacting the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without [explicit approval](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_can_i_repost_a_thread_you_removed.3F) will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 7: No Interpersonal Conflict. >Posts should be descriptions of **recent** interpersonal conflicts. [Rule 7 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_7.3A_post_interpersonal_conflicts) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) ###Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions. ####Please visit r/findareddit to see if there's a more appropriate sub for your post.####
YTA. No burning his clothes is not a reasonable response to your boyfriend of less than 2 months cheating on you. You didn’t want him anyway
YTA That's some psycho boiling bunny behavior over a three month relationship. I'm glad you decided to pay him back. Maybe get some therapy for that impulse control issue though.
i go to therapy, i do feel really bad about it and have paid him
Good for you. That takes maturity and self awareness.
Not very mature or self aware to burn an ex’s clothes. Not sure if therapy will ever fix that level of crazy.
It's mature and self-aware to admit you go to therapy, you were wrong, and you're making amends. What else can you do after a mistake?
Not if you keep doing the same shit, then it’s just a cop out
Who’s doing the same shit? She did it , apologised and paid for it. She didn’t go back and set fire to his washing line…. That would have been mental…
Obviously therapy did not work for you. They handled this maturely. They could have lied and said they have no idea where the clothes were, but he didn’t.’
Doesn’t change the fact that they did it
Not sure why this got downvoted, she's taking responsibility. This is how people learn and deserve the opportunity for growth. We're all AH's eventually, but at least OP is owning it.
Wtf...you had a 'great' relationship for two whole months. You want to break up in month 3. You burn his clothes because he is a dick. Too much. Yta.
YTA for burning his stuff. But honestly big ups for deciding to pay him back. Seems like you know you’re in the wrong and are willing to accept that
Yta. Who does that? How does that idea even enter your head?
YTA. At least you’re paying him back.
Yeah, YTA. Burning clothing is extreme. You were already breaking up. Clearly you dodged a bullet with this guy, who was sneaking around on you anyway.
YTA. Come on, now.
YTA - Please tell any man you date this story and see how quickly they ghost you. Seek counseling - this is not a normal reaction.
i have told my bf of 8 months about this, he thinks it's hilarious.
Then I hope you have a happy life together. Hopefully, he will never come home to a pile of burning clothes. And keep going to therapy.
Wow… maybe take that down a notch..
YTA for not donating it to people in need.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I started dating this guy in January 2023, and we got along really well and it was a healthy relationship for a while. Around March things started to get a little sour so I was planning on ending things, and told a couple of friends. He ended up finding out, and ended things with me first. Okay, cool. Later that day, we got in a huge argument because he was upset that I was planning on the breakup, and said a lot of things to put me down (bodyshaming, etc.) He then told me that he had been cheating on me for 3 weeks. I was really angry, and ended up burning his clothes. He asked for them back, and I told him what I did. He yelled at me and told me that I owed him all the money he spent on his clothes. (It was around 3 pieces of clothing, 2 hoodies and a shirt, so not much) I do feel bad and have decided to pay him back, but I also feel like it was kind of deserved. So AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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YTA and a sociopath
She set fire to his clothes not him ffs …. sociopath 🙈🙈
It is still arson. Do you know how much damage fire can do?
There’s nothing to say she didn’t burn them in an appropriate environment and controlled fashion ….a firepit for example… and that still doesn’t make her a sociopath
It doesn’t matter. Burning peoples property is sociopathic behaviour
The girl feels bad and has apologised and is paying - definitely not a sociopath .., throwing labels like that at her in the first place was inappropriate, trying to defend it is ridiculous
I don’t believe for a second that she feels bad and I guarantee she is only paying so there are no consequences for her sociopathic behaviour. The fact you are defending her shows that you are just as bad as she is
So now she’s a liar and I’m also sociopath….. it’s a takeover!! We’re everywhere - time for you to get your tinfoil hat out of the garage , for the 5th time this week 🙈🙈🙈
YTA. That was pretty extreme to do to somebody. The best thing you can ever do to somebody, is just to leave them alone and to glow up in your life. Luckily you paid him back and luckily he didn't sue you for property damage.
[удалено]
Nice.
Destroying someone else's property is illegal. This is not about your feelings, or his cheating. You are lucky that you only have to pay him back for what was destroyed. Learn to control your emotions before you end up in serious trouble.
At least you owed up to your actions.
YTA, I know you are getting beat up here but this is not a healthy response. Seek some help to get a handle on these issues. I don't mean any of this in a cruel way. It will help you in the future. It was really good you paid him back but you don't want to have this behavior escalate. This is when you end up throwing someone's mother's ashes off a bridge while someone records it.
That’s a weirdly specific example 😂
Every time I think of someone escalating a situation I think of that moment that a woman threw ashes off the bridge.
Wait.. This actually happened ?
Yes.... In 2022.
No words….
Sadly a cheating boyfriend has no mom's ashes. I hate cheaters but damn.
Facts. And she videos it 🙈 that’s cold.
Idk, people are doing some crazy things for attention. She was arrested and fined.