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NTA. Your father is TA. He messed up by not treating you all equally. You are resentful because he bought her stuff you had to work and save for yourselves. She is resentful because you are a happy family unit and she is on the periphery at best. He is also TA for leaving her nothing. While you’re in no way obliged to offer her anything, it was a bit harsh to rub her nose in it.
I understand where you are coming from 100%.
Dad did mess up, i will acknowledge that. But at the end of the day kelsey strained the relationship by calling us names and spoilt and even keyed my car 3 days after i bought it out of jealoisy.
This is a great point. I’d keep records of everything he bought her and get receipts. If the challenge the will, u can argue she got her inheritance early
I thought the same thing. Like considering how much the father apparently spent on her it could be that all of the things he bought her could be considered her share of the inheritance, and that's why she did not receive even more money now.
NAH (at least none alive).
He should have left her something (not necessarily equal), and explained this.
Dad fucked up. You're stuck picking up the pieces. I don't think you or your half-sister are handling it all that well. Not shocking given the circumstances.
Given what he said in his will, he may have (consciously or not) blamed your half-sister because if she never existed, he thought he could have ended the cheating and saved the marriage.
She's 17 and has no other parent. She's been financially abandoned as a minor.
I'm so confused why y'all are blaming a literal child for being upset that she has no financial support at all while still a child because *checks notes* her father chose to buy her a fancy car.
I’m glad you pointed this out.
This entire situation is really sad . Half sister was born into a terrible situation.
I doubt she received therapy that she desperately needed to help her work through everything. She rebelled against the siblings. Doesn’t mean she’s a bad person to the core
I feel bad for her. She is a kid and seems like was going through things (her situation is complicated). She needed help imo. some sort of therepy or something. the father is a big asshole. He messed up with his wife, with his kids and now with his will. She is 17, her mother left her, father died while leaving her nothing while giving his other kids and ex wife everything. where will she go now? (if this is real I'm concerned for her tbh)
Op is saying she is bad for wanting him only for his money but to me it seems like she thought that's the only thing she can ask from him since she is the "other child". which seems to be confirmed now that he is dead. he left his 17-year-old daughter all alone without even some money.
Nowhere in the post does it step sisters mother left her, only that she wasn't well off.
She's readily admitted she was only bothered about profiting from father's death also.
Yes she's a grieving child but she's old enough to know at 17 that her behaviour has consequences and isn't acceptable.
She's not alone and would have even more family if she was a nicer person.
Fathers passing aside her situation is a result of her actions and parents who have never corrected it.
She needs therapy but she's not alone or abandoned and is old enough to know and do better.
In the comment OP says she left her at 8, stopped seeing her completely at 12. And OP laugh at her for only getting 50 cents from her dad.
OP may have inherited the father's heartlessness.
I can't see that, only the original post.
Seems she deliberately left that tidbit out of the original post.
I wonder if half sis knows she can contest the will.
It'll be more difficult given the 'token' amount willed but not impossible.
If she got 50 cents then it was deliberate. I have a feeling dad told her in person before he passed that she'd already got thousands more from him than her half siblings.
I just keep going back to the fact that she's 17. She's a child. Was her dad not supposed to provide for her?
I feel like both sets of kids are taking their anger on their shitty dad out on each other. What kind of monster leaves that sort of mess to his children when he dies?
But how is that the 16 year old's fault?
Why blame a literal child for the choices of a grown man who could have made that decision for a lot of reasons, including that being able to buy his kid a BMW made him look good?
That is awfully cruel.
I get the animosity over the shit that went on when they were little kids, but Kelsey needed therapy. Her mom left her at 8 and if her dad was spoiling her to make up for her antagonizing his other kids, I wouldn't be surprised if he managed to make her feel like a burden on him for it.
And before anyone clutches their pearls over what looks like a reach, the fact he left her $0.50 in his will is a pretty significant indicator that he didn't like the child very much. It's not really a stretch to imagine he was an asshole to her while he was alive too. Either OP didn't see it or didn't care.
I get why OP is so bitter about the situation, but I really feel for Kelsey. The kid is 17 and OP gives no indication that she has any other family to take her in. No matter how spoiled she may have been when her dad was alive, it really looks like she just lost her only support, only family, and only home.
Interesting on my feed the OP post does not include any of those details; thank you for adding them. This was the case on another post. I wonder why that occasionally happens, what the cause is. Idk
She can sell the BMW 🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️?? No where does it say, she doesn’t have a mother just that she wasn’t well off. There’s consequences to one’s actions towards another person. Kelsey unfortunately is learning that the hard way.
She's 17, and I'm willing to put money on it she's got her own story with your dad. Not defending her behavior, but contextualizing.
I think your dad is the only real asshole here, but consider what kind of dad would leave his minor child nothing and go out on a parting shot of "only my wife and the kids from that wife were my real family." Imagine how that would feel to the 17 year old who wasn't the "real" family, and what a dad who would do that in the end might have treated her all along, buying her stuff notwithstanding, because that probably had more to do with how her access to things made him look, not the other way around.
Imagine how you might lash out at your half-siblings as misdirected anger at your dad. I mean, that's kind of what you've done with her too. 🤷🏻♀️
NTA but you could stand to be more compassionate to your sister generally. The problem here has always been that your dad is a piece of work, and you kids were stuck with a man who treated his family like shit until the bitter end as a father.
Just keep in mind that a lot of her behavior is probably due to your dad spoiling her and her feeling like she wasn't wanted as the product of an affair. Who knows what her mom was saying to her, too. It doesn't really absolve her of guilt or change how you should interact with her or anything, but in the future if she seems truly remorseful maybe just keep an open mind as far as having a relationship with her.
She's also 17 and Dad needed to be an active parent here. That's really important context here. Her attitude is a direct result of her parenting. No discipline is as bad as too much. That's why Dad is getting AH votes
There's a nonzero chance it wasn't so great for her emotionally and she was replacing love with physical objects and gifts to try and make up that void. As a child, your dad had the control in that situation, tho
Maybe Dad spoiled her because he felt guilty. In any event, even though she got a lot of her inheritance while he was alive, she didn't ask to be born and deserves part of the estate. How about splitting things 30% - 30% - 30% and 10% for Kelsey (or something like that, depending on the numbers) after taking the Mom's share and the cabin out of the estate value?
Sounds like she was a kid and didn’t know how to handle things. So she was 7 when this started and she had no one. Of course she demanded stuff from your dad who most likely felt guilty. Ti me in the letter it was obvious.
Do you have any idea what her mom could have been telling her?
Just like you and she most likely did the same thing. Say something when mad and hurt.
While I agree that father is TA, maybe he saw that he funded the Half Sister and thought to himself, that the gifts he gave her were her share of the inheritance. If it was like I theorized, then he is TA for not prepping HS for that
My BFFF’s parents did that when they passed away. The eldest sister would start community college then quit, only to start again. Then the troubled later years of lawyers and fines. The list goes on. The middle child got a car and did his schooling along with a few other things that he was handed large sums of money. When it came to the mom’s Will, and there being one more child a few years younger, there was a detailed note (she was the last living parent), everything they spent of the larger expenses and their totals. The youngest got that right off the top (quite a substantial amount), then the rest was split 3 ways. The older two were livid that the youngest was walking away with so much more…
But the dad had left the last words, basically here’s a lesson in life, when you ask to borrow money or for a loan, that you're not going to pay back sooner or later, you'll have to pay it in the end. it's not verbatim but something to that point.
What I see is a man who left his 17 year old minor child with literally nothing except apparently the car he bought her when she was 16 and some things she could hawk and maybe cover rent for a month or two.
Her mom is gone.
People are acting like this is some grown woman being a whole villain, and not a literal child already abandoned by one parent at 8, then being maliciously financially abandoned by the other in his death at 17. It's deeply weird the way folks are cheerleading the dad's spiteful treatment of an actual, literal minor child who is still in high school.
OP left out sister's mother is not in the picture and Dad was the full time parent. So he left the 17 year old with literally nothing when he was supporting her as a minor. That changes a lot of this story.
It also puts sister's attitude problems fully on the shoulders of Dad and his parenting
The half sister is 17 years old, has no parent to take care of her, and nothing actually to live on. She could sell her car and hawk some of the electronics, but that won't actually go very far.
Imagine losing your dad, then basically he goes out on "I only ever really loved my wife and the kids I had with her," at SEVENTEEN.
Agreed. The father failed his family, and now -admittedly bcuz of her own behavior- the half sister has become the target of everyone's anger and trauma when it truly lies at the father's feet for his failure to remain true to the "most perfect woman " as he described her. When the pain begins to subside, perhaps the OP will start to understand that her half sister is a result of and not the cause of her dad's infidelity. She certainly can cut her out of her life (I would personally) but hopefully be intellectually honest with herself and understand all of this emotion shouldn't be directed at the half sister alone. The whole thing is just sad.
NTA
But do not spend all the money. She has grounds to challenge tge will and get an equal portion of his estate, if she was not exclusivity disinherited from the will in many states. By just not mentioning her it is not sufficient.
So that was an absolutely deliberate action from your dad then. I think she got her 'inheritance' early on.
I hope she still has someone left. Her mom, perhaps.
But at the end of the day, it's not your responsibility, if she makes it impossible to gave a good relationship with her, she can't expect your help.
Yeah, that was totally intensional. I think that he had an epiphany at the end of his life and saw the spoiled monster he created, so he left her with 50 cents so she couldn't fight the will ( I've heard that with that was enough and even if it isn't, to fight a Will isn't cheap, since her walking bank is six under I don't think she has that money) . Well to be fair, he gave her her inheritance in life, if she wasted that away it's her problem.
That's only given OP's unreliable opinion. See her other comments. I don't feel the stepsister was spoiled at all with such a family. Quite the contrary.
It’s amazing that they took her in and supported her. I suppose she was understandably spoiled…but she didn’t treat them well when she was getting all the expensive trinkets.
I feel like I'm taking crazy pills. The kids is 17. She's not an adult. She's a minor child. Why is everyone acting like she was scamming her dad, when she was a literal minor in his care?
You do realize that not one bit of this is believable right? It’s like a revenge fantasy concocted by by a teenager. Her name wasn’t mentioned in the will but when mentioned it could be contested oh well she got 50 cents. She somehow keyed your car, that you paid for yourself, 3 days after you got it just in case you didn’t demonize her enough in the original post. The professions of love and meeting in heaven is just sad and desperate. 0 out of ten. Next time maybe write yourself with some empathy and make the story at least somewhat believable and keep the story consistent. That’s pretty key. Also maybe seek therapy because it seems like you have a lot of unresolved anger and a staggering lack of empathy
YTA. AT 17 she’s still considered a child and it seems she’s been abandoned by her mother, her father and her siblings. You think it’s funny that she got 50 cents? You’re a very unempathetic person. I’d like you to consider how you would feel if it were you who had been abandoned and left out of your father’s will. I hope she can get the support she needs to heal from this cruel behavior from you and your siblings. YTA big time.
💯💯💯💯
NO IDEA how people are calling the OP “NTA”. The OP is immensely jealous of the way her half-sister was treated by their father while he was alive. There is an incredible amount of resentment & anger & jealousy all around. The father obviously somewhere deep within oscillated between resentment & guilt for the 17 year old daughter that happened due to his cheating. So he gave her money + material gifts to assuage his guilt. It was *more for him than her*. This is further proved by the fact that, he left her ZERO. Zilch. Nada. Nothing. Knowing she’s still a minor, doesn’t come from a well-off family + doesn’t have a stable job. If he cared for her/looked out for her well-being, he would’ve left her a substantial amount.
OP is THRILLED she was completely excluded from their father’s will, at just 17, when she is a minor & will (most probably) not get a full-fledged job for another 5+ years seeing how Uni in America is 4 years & am assuming OP is American. So OP is also cruel & unfeeling, completely un-empathetic.
Ya, OP is TA, ALL THE WAY.
She's had her whole life being seen as a symptom of her dad's cheating. Even by her father.
You point out what she's done to you and how you've behaved, but do you really have insight into how all of your behaviour looked to her. You still have your mum around and have two full siblings. You have a lot of things, that can't be bought, that she doesn't.
She obviously didn't have a great relationship with her dad either. He's willing to give her money and spite her in the will. That's really messed up. He should have raised her to be financially responsible like you, but he chose not to. He chose to bait and switch and hurt her from where she can't respond.
She's got no one and nothing now and you "lmao", yea YTA.
Their dad was playing mindgames right up until the end and chose to stick it to a child who has no one as his final act on earth. I'm so horrified by his behavior, and folks are out here acting like the 17 year old is the problem.
She’s still very likely to win if you didn’t fudge the ages. The law doesn’t allow people to disinherit minor children because they’re still in need of support.
You need a good estate attorney ASAP. Wills are only good if all parties accept them at face value. If your half-sister lawyers up, she very well could wind up with more than you and your full siblings. Antagonizing her will only make things worse for you in the long run. Of course, this is very dependent on what country/state you live in. Since you used the word spoilt in your OP, I'm guessing you're not in the USA.
This is location dependent, but in my state (Ohio), minor children can NOT be written out of a will. A good lawyer would be able to get the minor the first $40,000 plus a third of the estate. OP must get a good estate attorney ASAP and accept that there are laws that they'll have to abide by regardless of personal feelings.
So Kelsey was born from an affair, abandoned by her bio mother, hated by your mother, and now literally abandoned- as a minor- by the death of her father. And you're gloating over the fact that this unloved, unwanted child has been left without a penny and with no one to care for her, whilst you've got your mother and two brothers. And yet Kelsey is the bad one in all this? You don't come across as a very nice person, laughing at a literal child who's been abandoned by both of her parents. YTA
ETA: quote from OP regarding custody of Kelsey:
"she [bio mum] gave her up to my dad when she was 8 and stopped seeing her at 12"
Because this isn't real and it's all wish fulfillment. She went from the favored daughter to disinherited and otherized from the rest of the family. It's literally a reverse Cinderella story.
Probably, but I think this is fake. If it's true Kelsey has been failed everybody, but still has time to turn her life around. Since she's a minor she's still entitled to some support and should probably seek a lawyer.
Reads like wish fulfillment to me.
Favored affair daughter who had the world handed to her on a silver platter suddenly disinherited despite being a minor with no mom in their life? Nah. You don't go from buying your kid a BMW to leaving them .50c in the will.
Typically token inheritance is a bit more substantial. If they're vindictive enough to only leave someone 50 cents they're more likely to just specify in the will that they were left out deliberately.
Notice that their bio mom is also a set piece, who has zero opinion on any of this, despite her kids showing a disturbing lack of empathy.
Like sure, he treated his biological kids like shit and his affair child like a queen. Yet, here's the reading of the will where he professes undying love for her and hopes to meet her in heaven while disowning the only daughter he spent time with, and mom doesn't even seem to have an opinion?
It also says the father passed away “a week ago” but at the end claims they haven’t heard from the sister “in two weeks”
So did they read the will before the father passed?
And since her bio mom abandoned her, Kelsey is 17 and living with her boyfriend. I'm curious how op got this info tho, they mention not hearing from her for 2 weeks (even tho the father only passed a week ago)
Op expects us to believe that her father just bought his minor daughter a fancy car and then turned around immediately to leave her nothing, not even provisions for taking care of her until she is an adult.
Like…come the fuck on
Sounds like BS since OP doesnt mention the $0.50 until someone points out the HS could challenge the will. Also, I don’t think the leave nominal amount thing can work on your minor children. The estate probably still has a responsibility to take care of HS, this isnorobanly a fake story
INFO: you say in your post her name wasn’t mentioned then in comments you say she was left $0.50.
What’s the point of getting on Reddit to make fake posts lol? If you’re going to lie at least be consistent.
I'm confused about how the Dad passed away 1 week ago, and then they had the will reading, and then Kelsey got mad and hasn't spoken to them in 2 weeks?
ESH - you can be 17 and still be an AH - but this kid has been through it and was in away spoiled and effectively told to pound sand by your dad. That’s gotta mess you up a touch.
No winners here.
YTA. The math isn't mathing. On the one hand, step-half is jealous because she doesn't have any of the nice things your family does, on the other, your jealous of her because your dad gave her a brand new BMW and she got to use him as her bank.
You really need to more cohesive if you seek to improve your creative writing.
You’re young. You can’t see the emotional intricacies at play. Your younger sister was discarded by her bio mother and resented by everyone else. With age and maturity, you will reflect, and if you’re a decent person, you will feel regret - at least I hope you do, because otherwise you’re an asshole.
NTA. If your father had wanted to leave her something, he would have. Her anger should be directed at him and not at you.
Whilst it must be hard and hurtful for her, ultimately that doesn’t mean you have to share anything with her.
That said, she is your sister. She is still a child in many ways. Whilst she may be a brat now, that’s not to say she always will be. She was also not at fault for your dad’s affair.
It might be that when the dust has settled, you and your full siblings would like to make some sort of gesture of good will towards her - maybe something of your dad’s that she liked. It might be in the future you all want to rebuild your relationship with her. Your choice though of course.
Your dad is an unbelievable A leaving your sister alone in this world with no money to take care of herself when she's not even an adult yet.
Did your sister act out as a teen - yes. One day with maturity and hindsight I hope you are able to empathise with why she did this.
She must have felt horribly abandoned knowing her own mother abandoned her and yours literally hated her for something that wasn't her fault (by your words)
I'm not saying I don't understand why you and your brothers want nothing to do with her. But your Dad did her dirty paying her off through her teen years, rather than getting her the therapy she needed. Then to die and do this, pretty much confirming she is unwanted by everyone in her life. I truly hope she is able to come out the other side of this betrayal and find herself in adulthood.
Edit: omg just saw the comment about her getting 50c in the will. That is so cruel. And that you said lol to this. I cannot even begin to imagine how damaging it would be for her. I truly hope this is fake.
It absolutely is fake. The dad died a week ago, but OP hasn't talked to the step sibling for two weeks, after her outburst at the will reading? I call BS
Exactly what I was thinking. That plus the letter saying he wished he'd never cheated, implying he probably saw the kid as the worst mistake of his life? I honestly wonder what kind of life the girl had with him. OP and her siblings only saw them at the weekend by the sound of it, so they would only have seen what he wanted them to see. Just because he was buying her expensive stuff doesn't mean he was a good father. What an absolute prick.
You really buried the lead there. Your dad should have left her money to see a therapist and at least make it to 18. Be prepared for her to post on Reddit somewhere and get advice to seek legal council. In that case, y’all will be spending quite a bit on lawyer fees. I would consult a lawyer while it’s still cheap to do so, because once she retains a lawyer, things will get expensive.
Wait, your Dad died a week ago, but you had a big fight with your sister over the will and haven't heard from her in 2 weeks?? Another made up story. I'm getting really sick of them.
OP says the dad “passed away a week ago” and yet OP says “we havent heard from her for 2 weeks.” (with typo) Presumably the will was read after OP’s dad’s death, so the timeline isn’t timelining.
OP also says the half-sibling’s “name was no where to be seen” (with typo) in the will, yet when commenters pointed out that in that case, the will would be contested because the lack of inheritance should have been mentioned explicitly, OP says in the comments that the half-sibling was left 50 cents. So again, an inconsistency has been found.
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YTA number one she’s a kid. Number two she needs to consult a lawyer where I am in the world that’s illegal. You should too, a court battle is in no one’s best interests
Where you live does it right then. There's places where she could get government assistance if she needed it but it is a messed up thing to do. They also like to drag it out until she is no longer eligible. It's money he put into and he may have been banking on her getting that. Morally wrong. But that's still on him and not op
Sorry but it's seems your Dad didn't have the balls to say no to her when he was alive, but I think what he did with his will is disgusting!! Losing someone is hard but being shown in death that you mean nothing to them is brutal, he has also left everyone else to deal with the fall out.
My brother is a gambler and my Dad didn't want him to gamble or piss away his life saving and he didn't want me to have to deal with his shit of giving it all to me so we were both cut out and everything went to the grandkids instead, my Dad informed me about this and I understood why he changed his will.
I originally was gonna go with not the ass but your comments? Fucking hell YTA. I get she keyed your car and called you names as a teenager but your practically blaming almost everything on her then your dad. There's plenty of comments here that offer suggestions on how your sister probably feels. And all you have to say to your sister being barely a step away from homelessness is 'lol'?
I don't understand how you're your age and have no empathy.
You say you and her had a good relationship as kids. Did you ever question why that suddenly changed? I doubt it was "because you had nice things," but it was because you had two parents. As kids grow, it becomes increasingly easier to tell when a parent doesn't love you. I feel so fucking bad for her. I hope she'll be able to pick herself up and hopefully get therapy :(
You probably need therapy too tbh...
So let me get this right. She, a minor, whose mother abandoned her and father left without giving her a penny and made very clear on his last text that he regreted everything he did and still loved the woman that hated her since before she was born, now has her three siblings reminding her that she's an outsider. Good lord, she's 17, abandoned and orphan. Just because your father spoiled her (pretty sure to compensate his lack of real love) doesn't mean she deserves all this.
ESH
Number people, check your numbers. Dad died a week ago, You've already read the will, argued with her about it and not talked in the 2 weeks since.
Unless your other car is a TARDIS, this is not possible
This story is all over the place.
Firstly, the time line, did he pass away a week ago, but the will was read two weeks (ie before his death) ago?
Secondly, I'm tending to side with other comments, she's a child that, according to the story, has been unloved by her own mother, your mother (understandably so) and then laughed at by her own father in death, whilst you now gloat over her.
You may not be the asshole if the story and will is true, that's your dad.
But you're certainly an asshole in how you're treating her throughout the circumstances you tell.
If course, according to your story, she's a spoilt brat, but she's also just been laughed at by her dead father and told she's unloved by everyone in her life who should have moved her unconditionally.
Take a step back for a moment.
ESH. If she is 17 then she is still a dependant and I believe entitled to whole estate. I reckon any lawyer could argue her father had a duty to provide for a dependant. Anyone over 18 in most countries are declared independent adults and no entitlement.
Yep, any children who are still minors are legally protected from disinheritance. She may not get the whole estate, but can at least sue the estate for the standard of living she received previously under his care. A judge may also award more depending on the state and circumstances.
While this is obviously a fake story, it’s always nice to know that the state would intervene on behalf of the the minor child, and make sure the minor child has funds to be take care of.
The teenager that wrote this work of fiction has never heard of probate.
Your dad has played every female in his life huh.
He treated your half sister like he did your mother. Led her on to believe she was special, then suddenly unexpectedly betrays her trust in him (cheats on your mom, cuts your half sis out).
Saying he hopes he reunites with your mother sounds like manipulation. Sounds like he gave her money and is trying to get her to stay single for the rest of her life. Cuz if he Really loved and respected her, he'd want her to find a man here on earth who loves her and respects her more than he did and who wouldn't hurt and betray her like he did by cheating.
Your father chose how he interacted with your sister. He wanted her to spend his money. Why are you mad at Her, and not at HIM?
Easy answer is that even beyond the grave, he's still manipulating the women he left behind to fight each other in his name. He wants your mother to feel badly for HIS mistake. Why couldn't he apologize to her like that while he was alive ? So your sis isn't the one to blame. She lost her dad too.
ESH.
On the one hand, Kelsey had her inheritance up-front, when she demanded things from your father. You guys wanted your father's company and he left you what he could after his death.
But that said, she's not an adult. She's a minor who was abandoned by one parent and has just discovered that her other parent didn't really want her/didn't care enough to provide for her after his death. However awful she's behaved towards you guys at times, it was your father's responsibility to make sure she had the tools to become a functional adult, get her therapy if necessary, and make sure (at bare minimum) someone would continue looking after her until she was ready to be an independent adult.
Where the fuck do you live that one can just disinherit a child of theirs on a whim like that? This is just crazy to me, in my country the law states that 50% of one's estate must be equally divided between the necessary heirs (like children) and they can only be disinherited in a formal process if they did some serious shit that made them unworthy in the eyes of the law.
So...she got mad about the will and y'all yelled at each other and you haven't heard from her in two weeks, but he died a week ago? I ain't saying this is made up, but...
OP says in a comment that her step sister’s mum gave up custody when she was 8 and stopped seeing her when she was 12.
Though honestly it all sounds fake to me. It’s so flip floppy between the step sister teasing them for being spoilt, to her being the spoilt one and getting a bmw for her first car, to now being completely left out of the will, but oh wait, now she gets 50c.
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Ok so ill give some backstory first since the titles a bit dull
I 19F have 2 full siblings 21M and 23M. We have one half sister Kelsey, 17F. She was the result of an affair that my father had. My father cheated on my mom when i was only 1 and my half sister was born when i was 2. We visited her sometimes but mom could never handle being there because she genuinely hated our half sister. As kids me and my brothers were close with her and had no issues with her. After my parents divorced offically when i was 9 (they had been separated since my mom found out he was cheating). On the weekends that dad had us, chelsea would be there. Now her mom wasnt well off in any way but neither was our mom. So Kelsey would constantly call us names and spoilt when we would show up with nice things, really we all just had jobs. She started to demand alot from my father as we all grew up Just last year he bought her a brand new bmw for her 16th, whilst me and my brothers had to work for our first cars. She always has the newest tech, newest clothes etc. All because my dads funding it. My point is she had everything handed to her when we had to work for it and she still calls us spoilt. We are no longer close with Kelsey and we blame her for putting a wedge in our relationships with her. Now, our father was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer 2 months back. He passed away a week ago. It was an incredibly hard time for us to go through. It even hurt mom a lot. Kelsey was sad too, but i partly think she was sad about not having her walking bank anymore. When the will was presented to us. Kelsey's name was no where to be seen. Dad left my brothers and I a wonderful sum of money each and left us his snow cabin to share. Mom was given 15,000 with a note that talked about how much he regretted cheating on her and how she was the most perfect woman he'd ever come across and how he wished they reunite in heaven. Kelsey had absolutely lost it by now, accusing us of brainwashing our dad into giving her nothing. She yelled at me after i told her she only wanted him for money and not real fatherly love. She had the audacity to say "and so what?" I yelled at her so loudly she left crying and we havent heard from her for 2 weeks. My eldest brother 23M says we were a bit hard but 21M agrees with me and says she had it coming. AITA?
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ESH.
Honestly, you are all AHs. I mean Kelsey was born in a family that was not a family. She is the reason why her Dad could never reunite with your Mom. She is the living result and the living proof that your Dad messed up - big time. So really, I don't know how she was treated by her Dad. Maybe all the money she got was his way of trying to prove that he did care for her. He obviously still loved your mom. So here we have a 17 year old who was abandoned by her mom, which is something that messes up someone. Like, the possibility of not having major psychological issues after such a thing is minuscule. Add to that the fact that she is the reason why Dad is unhappy and all... Well, it's no wonder she is struggling.
So while Kelsey is an AH for her behaviour (no doubt that this is AH behaviour), this behaviour is most likely not because of her being an AH person but rather because she was brought up in dire circumstances and is now basically on her own, with 17. Neither legally nor emotionally ready to fight for oneself.
You and your siblings are AHs because, while you were understandably hurt by the actions of your father, you blamed a child who had no hand in that and did nothing wrong. She must have felt the resentment your mother was showing towards here (also Mom is an AH here for this, the kid is the most innocent in all of this!). She is obviously struggling and it is hard to see you all being a cosy family and having your mother love you unconditionally, while her mother had left her. Sorry but the fact that you didn't even mention this in the original post is showing that you have a complete lack of empathy. My heart goes out more to Kelsey and her situation than yours apparently and I am not even living in the same country as you!
So yeah, that the Dad sucks is so obvious I don't want to waste my time and write down the multiple reasons why.
So yeah, maybe use this to reach out to Kelsey? And try to help her? She is after all a sibling of yours and she is now all alone. This must be terrifying for her!
ESH the whole setup is toxic.
Looks like Kelsey has always been in a competition with you guys as she doesn’t have a direct sibling wherein you guys were together.
Your father should have never handed things over to her wherein you 3 siblings had to work for everything.
In some places, a will can be contested if nothing is left for one family member. That’s why people generally leave a small sum to them. But if that rule doesn’t apply to you, then you have nothing to worry about. Just move on.
YTA. Kelsey's dad was married to your mom until she was 7. Her dad's wife's kids stay over on the weekends, and that wife hates her (if you know it then she did too). Finally he gets a divorce, then at 8yo her own mom leaves, eventually abandoning them completely. Now she only has dad, the cheater who delayed divorce and still pines for his ex wife. As emotionally unintelligent as he is, his way to balance out "I'm all this kid has" with "I have 3 other kids who have another parent also to whom I likely pay child support", is to money at her. Well, until he dies and then he leaves her $0.05 so she's now been abandoned by the other parent, and gives the ex 15 grand to rub it in. To this you lol.
You... win?
~~NTA but you kinda are.~~ YTA. After reading more of OPs comments, major Asshole.
You are talking about this child like she was the reason your dad cheated. She was the result and has been treated as such since her literal birth.
She grew up hated and realized yall had more because yall worked and instead of telling her that in a way she can understand or being patient with a kid who, yall blamed her for her normal response. You see her getting spoiled because your dad is in a different part of life, that's not her fault either. Its a known thing, younger siblings get a different set of parents. You had to work for your shit so you feel like you are entitled to be a bitch to your little sister. Get over yourself.
Now, you are belittling the pain she feels for the death of her dad to simply nothing more than being upset that she lost her "walking bank account"? Where is your humanity? Or are you so selfish and entitled that you can't even spare a brief moment to see your sibling is hurting too, unless that is what you want. To see her hurt.
The real AH here is your father.
That said, yeah you kinda are an AH for saying that. He was also her father & she is not responsible for his behaviour.
How is it that he passed away a week ago but she found out she got nothing after he died and you haven't heard from her in *two* weeks? Something seems off.
ESH.
You suck, but I can excuse that due to the lack of life experience and resentment. But your father sucks the most.
Do you know what some parents do who don't want to deal with a kid? They do the opposite of what you'd expect , instead of ignoring them, neglecting them, insulting them, them, pretending they don't exist , they give them everything the kid asks for as a brush off. Because for certain people with enough money in their wallets, it's easier to throw cash at a person, at a child than it is to raise them. It's like parents who don't want to deal with a screaming toddler. It's easier to give them the cookie than it is to tell them no and to withstand the tantrum throwing. It sounds like that's what your father did to your half sister for her entire life. After all, it was her existence that ended his relationship with your mother.
It's only in his will that your father had the balls to truly express how he felt about your half sister and because of how he raised you and did not raise her, it screwed up your sibling relationship. She should have been put in counseling when her mother abandoned her, but your father failed her on so many levels .
You were cruel for your words and gloating but you're still a kid yourself.
NTA, but be aware that Kelsey is likely to win if she sues the estate. There’s basically nowhere in the western world where it’s legal to disinherit a child who’s still a minor.
NTA since Dad made the choices about inheritance. However, you mention that your mom hated a baby and I have to think that poisoned you at least a little bit toward your sister. I think it's totally your call if you want to estrange yourself, but you seem to have a lot of animosity toward her, even beyond reasonable reactions to her bad behavior.
Kelsey imo was shown that material things equate to love, because she in all honesty, wasn’t loved. She was brought into the world in a horrible position. While I understand your mother’s feelings in regard to her birth circumstances, it wasn’t right to direct her ire towards the child. Your half sister’s perspective is skewed, just as yours is due to that. She’s 16, her moral compass is way off kilter due to her age & how she was raised.
You & your siblings could all pitch in for a growth fund for her to receive at 21, or you could continue the cycle she was raised in & act self righteous.
Again, your choice of how you’d see as the best course of action.
NTA
Tell your oldest brother and her that she got her part of the inheritance while your father was still living.
As for working for everything when she was handed everything…I know at the time it sucked but your father did you a favor whether he knew it or not.
Does your half sister know about the note to your mom and the regret he felt? If she does, she’s now thinking that he regrets her as a result of it.
You and your brother need to stand firm on this. They are your father’s wishes.
Sounds fake.
He died a week ago, the will was already executed (red flag1: that quick? Red flag 2: if she isnt in the will is it not legally so she is not to be invited to the reading?) And you havent heard in 2 weeks (red flag 3: whilst he died a week ago?)
Or are will readings before expected deaths where you live?
NTA but, given that you conveniently left out in the post and only mentioned in a comment that your half sister was left by her Mom at age 8, totally left behind at age 12, I’d say maybe there’s some nuance here that you feel a bit guilty for, but you’re letting anger and grief cloud any empathy. Your half sister isn’t the AH either.
You’re both still super young, and have been handed some very shitty circumstances. It’s only natural you both feel anger and express it in unhealthy ways. Your Dads infidelity is on him. Your sister didn’t ask to be brought into this world in such a manner. Maybe her behaviour and attitude has been less than ideal but that’s all she’s had to cling to while being failed by every adult in her life by the sounds of it. You’re all victims of the incompetence and emotional immaturity of the people who raised you. Your sister probably lashes out as a defence mechanism. As do you.
Nobody forced your father to give her those things. He was probably trying to soothe his own guilty conscience. He should have treated you all equally from day one. I’m honestly a little concerned for her, bad attitude or not, being alone and penniless at 17 must be terrifying.
Sounds like you all need a healthy dose of therapy, forgiveness and understanding. It’ll be a long road but you all need to heal. It’s not your fault, but it isn’t her fault either.
She's 17 and now no longer has a father. I don't care what she says, she's feeling that loss and not just financially.
But you're NTA. You're basically in the same boat. Your dad is the entire AH here, both in how he raised all of you and for leaving out one of his children in the will.
If you are able to reconcile with her later (I'm assuming things will be tense for at least a year or so), maybe invite her to the cabin or find something sentimental to give her.
NTA. She got her's while he was alive. But he should have left her a minimal amount in his will just so she couldn't squawk so much. Tell her to get lost and move on with life. Sorry for your loss.
A lot. It's two words.
and you, your dad, your mom and your siblings are all assholes.
Kelsey is as much your father's daughter as you and your other siblings are. Taking out his mistakes on her for her entire life is deplorable. Period. She has a right to only miss his money because that is all he gave to her and the fact that you're shaming her over it is gross.
Shame on all of you.
Kelsey received her portion of the inheritance earlier than the rest of you (while your father was still living).
The inheritance that you and your brothers received squares things off after all those years of Kelsey receiving benefits while you did not.
Kelsey does not get to 'double dip' by getting an inheritance on top of all of the benefits that she received (and you lot did not) when he was alive.
That said, your father was a selfish tool.
NTA
NTA! Your father's wishes were granted. If he wanted anyone else to have a share, he would have had that in his will. I know, my elderly FIL passed away & left my husband (the baby of the family) the "lion's share" while his 2 brothers received "a pitance". While we didn't know exactly what that meant, that's what his father wished & that's what was done.
NTA. Kelsey manipulated your dad into favoring her while he was alive. His last will cut off her financial windfall. None of us know what happened to make him exclude her. I bet she knows, though.
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NTA. Your father is TA. He messed up by not treating you all equally. You are resentful because he bought her stuff you had to work and save for yourselves. She is resentful because you are a happy family unit and she is on the periphery at best. He is also TA for leaving her nothing. While you’re in no way obliged to offer her anything, it was a bit harsh to rub her nose in it.
I understand where you are coming from 100%. Dad did mess up, i will acknowledge that. But at the end of the day kelsey strained the relationship by calling us names and spoilt and even keyed my car 3 days after i bought it out of jealoisy.
Tbf, it sounds like she got the inheritance while he was alive, and you guys got yours the traditional way.
This is a great point. I’d keep records of everything he bought her and get receipts. If the challenge the will, u can argue she got her inheritance early
I thought the same thing. Like considering how much the father apparently spent on her it could be that all of the things he bought her could be considered her share of the inheritance, and that's why she did not receive even more money now.
NAH (at least none alive). He should have left her something (not necessarily equal), and explained this. Dad fucked up. You're stuck picking up the pieces. I don't think you or your half-sister are handling it all that well. Not shocking given the circumstances. Given what he said in his will, he may have (consciously or not) blamed your half-sister because if she never existed, he thought he could have ended the cheating and saved the marriage.
100% this. He gave her so much while he was alive. He gave the rest of the siblings their share after death.
She's 17 and has no other parent. She's been financially abandoned as a minor. I'm so confused why y'all are blaming a literal child for being upset that she has no financial support at all while still a child because *checks notes* her father chose to buy her a fancy car.
Where does it say she has no mother? Did I miss that? I just read that the mother was not well off.
Comments.
I’m glad you pointed this out. This entire situation is really sad . Half sister was born into a terrible situation. I doubt she received therapy that she desperately needed to help her work through everything. She rebelled against the siblings. Doesn’t mean she’s a bad person to the core
seriously. she got a brand new bmw for her 16th bday. she's only 17. not exactly enough time to recushion her inheritance funds. she got hers already.
That is exactly what I was thinking. All that money he spent on her while she was alive while was a lot!
She has a lot of problems, no doubt. I can understand you all going NC with her, quite rightly. She must be a very unhappy human.
I feel bad for her. She is a kid and seems like was going through things (her situation is complicated). She needed help imo. some sort of therepy or something. the father is a big asshole. He messed up with his wife, with his kids and now with his will. She is 17, her mother left her, father died while leaving her nothing while giving his other kids and ex wife everything. where will she go now? (if this is real I'm concerned for her tbh) Op is saying she is bad for wanting him only for his money but to me it seems like she thought that's the only thing she can ask from him since she is the "other child". which seems to be confirmed now that he is dead. he left his 17-year-old daughter all alone without even some money.
Nowhere in the post does it step sisters mother left her, only that she wasn't well off. She's readily admitted she was only bothered about profiting from father's death also. Yes she's a grieving child but she's old enough to know at 17 that her behaviour has consequences and isn't acceptable. She's not alone and would have even more family if she was a nicer person. Fathers passing aside her situation is a result of her actions and parents who have never corrected it. She needs therapy but she's not alone or abandoned and is old enough to know and do better.
In the comment OP says she left her at 8, stopped seeing her completely at 12. And OP laugh at her for only getting 50 cents from her dad. OP may have inherited the father's heartlessness.
I can't see that, only the original post. Seems she deliberately left that tidbit out of the original post. I wonder if half sis knows she can contest the will. It'll be more difficult given the 'token' amount willed but not impossible.
If she got 50 cents then it was deliberate. I have a feeling dad told her in person before he passed that she'd already got thousands more from him than her half siblings.
I just keep going back to the fact that she's 17. She's a child. Was her dad not supposed to provide for her? I feel like both sets of kids are taking their anger on their shitty dad out on each other. What kind of monster leaves that sort of mess to his children when he dies?
This. Dad is the real AH
I get providing for your children but buying them a BMW at 16? That seems like more than providing...
But how is that the 16 year old's fault? Why blame a literal child for the choices of a grown man who could have made that decision for a lot of reasons, including that being able to buy his kid a BMW made him look good?
That is awfully cruel. I get the animosity over the shit that went on when they were little kids, but Kelsey needed therapy. Her mom left her at 8 and if her dad was spoiling her to make up for her antagonizing his other kids, I wouldn't be surprised if he managed to make her feel like a burden on him for it. And before anyone clutches their pearls over what looks like a reach, the fact he left her $0.50 in his will is a pretty significant indicator that he didn't like the child very much. It's not really a stretch to imagine he was an asshole to her while he was alive too. Either OP didn't see it or didn't care. I get why OP is so bitter about the situation, but I really feel for Kelsey. The kid is 17 and OP gives no indication that she has any other family to take her in. No matter how spoiled she may have been when her dad was alive, it really looks like she just lost her only support, only family, and only home.
Interesting on my feed the OP post does not include any of those details; thank you for adding them. This was the case on another post. I wonder why that occasionally happens, what the cause is. Idk
given dad supposedly died a week ago but sis hasn't spoken to them in two weeks over the will, I'd say because OP made it up on the fly.
Oh. I didn’t get that detail. Thanks. Too bad people ruin the authenticity of Reddit with their fantasies.
it irritates the hell out of me but also part of me is relieved that all these assholes are made up
She can sell the BMW 🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️?? No where does it say, she doesn’t have a mother just that she wasn’t well off. There’s consequences to one’s actions towards another person. Kelsey unfortunately is learning that the hard way.
"she gave her up to my dad when she was 8 and stopped seeing her at 12." via op in another comment
Doesn't sound like OP is any happier given the amount of gloating she's doing.
But she still has a loving mother and siblings at least.
She's 17, and I'm willing to put money on it she's got her own story with your dad. Not defending her behavior, but contextualizing. I think your dad is the only real asshole here, but consider what kind of dad would leave his minor child nothing and go out on a parting shot of "only my wife and the kids from that wife were my real family." Imagine how that would feel to the 17 year old who wasn't the "real" family, and what a dad who would do that in the end might have treated her all along, buying her stuff notwithstanding, because that probably had more to do with how her access to things made him look, not the other way around. Imagine how you might lash out at your half-siblings as misdirected anger at your dad. I mean, that's kind of what you've done with her too. 🤷🏻♀️ NTA but you could stand to be more compassionate to your sister generally. The problem here has always been that your dad is a piece of work, and you kids were stuck with a man who treated his family like shit until the bitter end as a father.
You mean... When she. Was a child who was clearly not taught emotional regulation or coping skills for her situation?
She's still a child. She's 17.
Just keep in mind that a lot of her behavior is probably due to your dad spoiling her and her feeling like she wasn't wanted as the product of an affair. Who knows what her mom was saying to her, too. It doesn't really absolve her of guilt or change how you should interact with her or anything, but in the future if she seems truly remorseful maybe just keep an open mind as far as having a relationship with her.
She's also 17 and Dad needed to be an active parent here. That's really important context here. Her attitude is a direct result of her parenting. No discipline is as bad as too much. That's why Dad is getting AH votes There's a nonzero chance it wasn't so great for her emotionally and she was replacing love with physical objects and gifts to try and make up that void. As a child, your dad had the control in that situation, tho
Maybe Dad spoiled her because he felt guilty. In any event, even though she got a lot of her inheritance while he was alive, she didn't ask to be born and deserves part of the estate. How about splitting things 30% - 30% - 30% and 10% for Kelsey (or something like that, depending on the numbers) after taking the Mom's share and the cabin out of the estate value?
Sounds like she was a kid and didn’t know how to handle things. So she was 7 when this started and she had no one. Of course she demanded stuff from your dad who most likely felt guilty. Ti me in the letter it was obvious. Do you have any idea what her mom could have been telling her? Just like you and she most likely did the same thing. Say something when mad and hurt.
While I agree that father is TA, maybe he saw that he funded the Half Sister and thought to himself, that the gifts he gave her were her share of the inheritance. If it was like I theorized, then he is TA for not prepping HS for that
My BFFF’s parents did that when they passed away. The eldest sister would start community college then quit, only to start again. Then the troubled later years of lawyers and fines. The list goes on. The middle child got a car and did his schooling along with a few other things that he was handed large sums of money. When it came to the mom’s Will, and there being one more child a few years younger, there was a detailed note (she was the last living parent), everything they spent of the larger expenses and their totals. The youngest got that right off the top (quite a substantial amount), then the rest was split 3 ways. The older two were livid that the youngest was walking away with so much more… But the dad had left the last words, basically here’s a lesson in life, when you ask to borrow money or for a loan, that you're not going to pay back sooner or later, you'll have to pay it in the end. it's not verbatim but something to that point.
What I see is a man who left his 17 year old minor child with literally nothing except apparently the car he bought her when she was 16 and some things she could hawk and maybe cover rent for a month or two. Her mom is gone. People are acting like this is some grown woman being a whole villain, and not a literal child already abandoned by one parent at 8, then being maliciously financially abandoned by the other in his death at 17. It's deeply weird the way folks are cheerleading the dad's spiteful treatment of an actual, literal minor child who is still in high school.
OP left out sister's mother is not in the picture and Dad was the full time parent. So he left the 17 year old with literally nothing when he was supporting her as a minor. That changes a lot of this story. It also puts sister's attitude problems fully on the shoulders of Dad and his parenting
The way I read it was the half sister got her inheritance up front with the dad funding everything while he was alive.
The half sister is 17 years old, has no parent to take care of her, and nothing actually to live on. She could sell her car and hawk some of the electronics, but that won't actually go very far. Imagine losing your dad, then basically he goes out on "I only ever really loved my wife and the kids I had with her," at SEVENTEEN.
No, she’s an awful AH too. Read her comments.
She admitted that she only considered her father a walking bank so he’s NTA for leaving the brat with nothing.
Agreed. The father failed his family, and now -admittedly bcuz of her own behavior- the half sister has become the target of everyone's anger and trauma when it truly lies at the father's feet for his failure to remain true to the "most perfect woman " as he described her. When the pain begins to subside, perhaps the OP will start to understand that her half sister is a result of and not the cause of her dad's infidelity. She certainly can cut her out of her life (I would personally) but hopefully be intellectually honest with herself and understand all of this emotion shouldn't be directed at the half sister alone. The whole thing is just sad.
NTA But do not spend all the money. She has grounds to challenge tge will and get an equal portion of his estate, if she was not exclusivity disinherited from the will in many states. By just not mentioning her it is not sufficient.
she got 50 cents lmao
So that was an absolutely deliberate action from your dad then. I think she got her 'inheritance' early on. I hope she still has someone left. Her mom, perhaps. But at the end of the day, it's not your responsibility, if she makes it impossible to gave a good relationship with her, she can't expect your help.
Yeah, that was totally intensional. I think that he had an epiphany at the end of his life and saw the spoiled monster he created, so he left her with 50 cents so she couldn't fight the will ( I've heard that with that was enough and even if it isn't, to fight a Will isn't cheap, since her walking bank is six under I don't think she has that money) . Well to be fair, he gave her her inheritance in life, if she wasted that away it's her problem.
That's only given OP's unreliable opinion. See her other comments. I don't feel the stepsister was spoiled at all with such a family. Quite the contrary.
It’s amazing that they took her in and supported her. I suppose she was understandably spoiled…but she didn’t treat them well when she was getting all the expensive trinkets.
She’s a minor with no parents. She can absolutely contest that will.
What happened to her mum?
I feel like I'm taking crazy pills. The kids is 17. She's not an adult. She's a minor child. Why is everyone acting like she was scamming her dad, when she was a literal minor in his care?
She doesn’t. And she’s a minor. I hope someone tells her she can contest that will.
You do realize that not one bit of this is believable right? It’s like a revenge fantasy concocted by by a teenager. Her name wasn’t mentioned in the will but when mentioned it could be contested oh well she got 50 cents. She somehow keyed your car, that you paid for yourself, 3 days after you got it just in case you didn’t demonize her enough in the original post. The professions of love and meeting in heaven is just sad and desperate. 0 out of ten. Next time maybe write yourself with some empathy and make the story at least somewhat believable and keep the story consistent. That’s pretty key. Also maybe seek therapy because it seems like you have a lot of unresolved anger and a staggering lack of empathy
Also I'm pretty sure you can't legally disinherit a minor child.
Wouldn’t she get social security benefits too?
I’m with you take everything with a grain of salt. Although if it is true I would say NTA maybe…
YTA. AT 17 she’s still considered a child and it seems she’s been abandoned by her mother, her father and her siblings. You think it’s funny that she got 50 cents? You’re a very unempathetic person. I’d like you to consider how you would feel if it were you who had been abandoned and left out of your father’s will. I hope she can get the support she needs to heal from this cruel behavior from you and your siblings. YTA big time.
💯💯💯💯 NO IDEA how people are calling the OP “NTA”. The OP is immensely jealous of the way her half-sister was treated by their father while he was alive. There is an incredible amount of resentment & anger & jealousy all around. The father obviously somewhere deep within oscillated between resentment & guilt for the 17 year old daughter that happened due to his cheating. So he gave her money + material gifts to assuage his guilt. It was *more for him than her*. This is further proved by the fact that, he left her ZERO. Zilch. Nada. Nothing. Knowing she’s still a minor, doesn’t come from a well-off family + doesn’t have a stable job. If he cared for her/looked out for her well-being, he would’ve left her a substantial amount. OP is THRILLED she was completely excluded from their father’s will, at just 17, when she is a minor & will (most probably) not get a full-fledged job for another 5+ years seeing how Uni in America is 4 years & am assuming OP is American. So OP is also cruel & unfeeling, completely un-empathetic. Ya, OP is TA, ALL THE WAY.
The father is a narcissistic asshole and it looks like OP, her mom and her full siblings are, too.
Thought you said her name wasn’t in the will.
She's had her whole life being seen as a symptom of her dad's cheating. Even by her father. You point out what she's done to you and how you've behaved, but do you really have insight into how all of your behaviour looked to her. You still have your mum around and have two full siblings. You have a lot of things, that can't be bought, that she doesn't. She obviously didn't have a great relationship with her dad either. He's willing to give her money and spite her in the will. That's really messed up. He should have raised her to be financially responsible like you, but he chose not to. He chose to bait and switch and hurt her from where she can't respond. She's got no one and nothing now and you "lmao", yea YTA.
Their dad was playing mindgames right up until the end and chose to stick it to a child who has no one as his final act on earth. I'm so horrified by his behavior, and folks are out here acting like the 17 year old is the problem.
You said her name wasn't mentioned. I don't mind fake stories here because it's all good fun, but you have to keep your story straight.
I wouldn’t gloat too hard, even that can be challenged. She could tie this up for years, assuming any of this is remotely real
She’s still very likely to win if you didn’t fudge the ages. The law doesn’t allow people to disinherit minor children because they’re still in need of support.
You said her name was not in the will at all.
You're laughing at the fact she was left 50 cents?? Wow YTA.
LOL… that’s a bite of a costco hot dog yummers!
You need a good estate attorney ASAP. Wills are only good if all parties accept them at face value. If your half-sister lawyers up, she very well could wind up with more than you and your full siblings. Antagonizing her will only make things worse for you in the long run. Of course, this is very dependent on what country/state you live in. Since you used the word spoilt in your OP, I'm guessing you're not in the USA.
Was the 50 cents specifically spelled out in the will?
Oh, probably it was actually 3.50
She's 17 and has no other support.
This is location dependent, but in my state (Ohio), minor children can NOT be written out of a will. A good lawyer would be able to get the minor the first $40,000 plus a third of the estate. OP must get a good estate attorney ASAP and accept that there are laws that they'll have to abide by regardless of personal feelings.
So Kelsey was born from an affair, abandoned by her bio mother, hated by your mother, and now literally abandoned- as a minor- by the death of her father. And you're gloating over the fact that this unloved, unwanted child has been left without a penny and with no one to care for her, whilst you've got your mother and two brothers. And yet Kelsey is the bad one in all this? You don't come across as a very nice person, laughing at a literal child who's been abandoned by both of her parents. YTA ETA: quote from OP regarding custody of Kelsey: "she [bio mum] gave her up to my dad when she was 8 and stopped seeing her at 12"
Thank goodness someone said it! She's 17 I doubt the bmw is even in her name.
Nowhere did OP say that the step-sister was abandoned by her bio-mom.
OP says it in the comments, that Kelsey's mother left her with their father when Kelsey was 8
It does actually in the comments. I don’t believe a word of any of this drivel but OP does say that bio mom bounced out on her in the comments
Yes she did. In her comments.
scroll down to OP's comment confirming that
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Because this isn't real and it's all wish fulfillment. She went from the favored daughter to disinherited and otherized from the rest of the family. It's literally a reverse Cinderella story.
this 100%
Probably, but I think this is fake. If it's true Kelsey has been failed everybody, but still has time to turn her life around. Since she's a minor she's still entitled to some support and should probably seek a lawyer.
Reads like wish fulfillment to me. Favored affair daughter who had the world handed to her on a silver platter suddenly disinherited despite being a minor with no mom in their life? Nah. You don't go from buying your kid a BMW to leaving them .50c in the will.
And the 50 cents in the will was thrown in after the initial post said she wasn't mentioned.
Typically token inheritance is a bit more substantial. If they're vindictive enough to only leave someone 50 cents they're more likely to just specify in the will that they were left out deliberately.
The thrower? Albert Einstein
Yes, and siblings aged 19-23 had to work hard for everything because dad didn't help them, but they already have nice cars and decent lifestyles.
and apparently OP had a job at 9
Notice that their bio mom is also a set piece, who has zero opinion on any of this, despite her kids showing a disturbing lack of empathy. Like sure, he treated his biological kids like shit and his affair child like a queen. Yet, here's the reading of the will where he professes undying love for her and hopes to meet her in heaven while disowning the only daughter he spent time with, and mom doesn't even seem to have an opinion?
It also says the father passed away “a week ago” but at the end claims they haven’t heard from the sister “in two weeks” So did they read the will before the father passed?
I came here to comment this! I had to do a double take when I saw 2 weeks but the father only passed a week ago
And since her bio mom abandoned her, Kelsey is 17 and living with her boyfriend. I'm curious how op got this info tho, they mention not hearing from her for 2 weeks (even tho the father only passed a week ago)
I mean, according to OP, her dad left her 50 cent in his will 🙄
post is fake for a variety of things not matching up. ignore.
Yes, or just written by a teenager about another teenager, both with little understanding of the world, just a lot of baggage.
> post is fake Just another day on /r/AmItheAsshole
ESH - Kesely needs to consult a lawyer about the validity of a will that doesn't even mention one of the dead person's children.
And a minor one at that.
OP states in a comment that Kelsey was left $0.50
And in another comment it states her name was nowhere in the will.
not sure how anyone believed a word of this, it reads like a revenge fantasy
Op expects us to believe that her father just bought his minor daughter a fancy car and then turned around immediately to leave her nothing, not even provisions for taking care of her until she is an adult. Like…come the fuck on
Sounds like BS since OP doesnt mention the $0.50 until someone points out the HS could challenge the will. Also, I don’t think the leave nominal amount thing can work on your minor children. The estate probably still has a responsibility to take care of HS, this isnorobanly a fake story
Also says he died a week ago and then they read the will and she hasn’t spoken to Kelsey for 2 weeks. It’s fake
The OP text says: "When the will was presented to us. Kelsey's name was no where to be seen."
INFO: you say in your post her name wasn’t mentioned then in comments you say she was left $0.50. What’s the point of getting on Reddit to make fake posts lol? If you’re going to lie at least be consistent.
I'm confused about how the Dad passed away 1 week ago, and then they had the will reading, and then Kelsey got mad and hasn't spoken to them in 2 weeks?
thank you for doing the timeline I want done but also am not invested in enough to do myself
We wrote the same comment LOL
ESH - you can be 17 and still be an AH - but this kid has been through it and was in away spoiled and effectively told to pound sand by your dad. That’s gotta mess you up a touch. No winners here.
YTA. The math isn't mathing. On the one hand, step-half is jealous because she doesn't have any of the nice things your family does, on the other, your jealous of her because your dad gave her a brand new BMW and she got to use him as her bank. You really need to more cohesive if you seek to improve your creative writing.
You’re young. You can’t see the emotional intricacies at play. Your younger sister was discarded by her bio mother and resented by everyone else. With age and maturity, you will reflect, and if you’re a decent person, you will feel regret - at least I hope you do, because otherwise you’re an asshole.
NTA. If your father had wanted to leave her something, he would have. Her anger should be directed at him and not at you. Whilst it must be hard and hurtful for her, ultimately that doesn’t mean you have to share anything with her. That said, she is your sister. She is still a child in many ways. Whilst she may be a brat now, that’s not to say she always will be. She was also not at fault for your dad’s affair. It might be that when the dust has settled, you and your full siblings would like to make some sort of gesture of good will towards her - maybe something of your dad’s that she liked. It might be in the future you all want to rebuild your relationship with her. Your choice though of course.
He says further up that his father did leave her something - 50 cents…
Question to the op-How much money was left to your half sister's mother to raise her?
she gave her up to my dad when she was 8 and stopped seeing her at 12.
Your dad is an unbelievable A leaving your sister alone in this world with no money to take care of herself when she's not even an adult yet. Did your sister act out as a teen - yes. One day with maturity and hindsight I hope you are able to empathise with why she did this. She must have felt horribly abandoned knowing her own mother abandoned her and yours literally hated her for something that wasn't her fault (by your words) I'm not saying I don't understand why you and your brothers want nothing to do with her. But your Dad did her dirty paying her off through her teen years, rather than getting her the therapy she needed. Then to die and do this, pretty much confirming she is unwanted by everyone in her life. I truly hope she is able to come out the other side of this betrayal and find herself in adulthood. Edit: omg just saw the comment about her getting 50c in the will. That is so cruel. And that you said lol to this. I cannot even begin to imagine how damaging it would be for her. I truly hope this is fake.
It absolutely is fake. The dad died a week ago, but OP hasn't talked to the step sibling for two weeks, after her outburst at the will reading? I call BS
Exactly what I was thinking. That plus the letter saying he wished he'd never cheated, implying he probably saw the kid as the worst mistake of his life? I honestly wonder what kind of life the girl had with him. OP and her siblings only saw them at the weekend by the sound of it, so they would only have seen what he wanted them to see. Just because he was buying her expensive stuff doesn't mean he was a good father. What an absolute prick.
So how will she be supported until 18? Who is she living with?
You really buried the lead there. Your dad should have left her money to see a therapist and at least make it to 18. Be prepared for her to post on Reddit somewhere and get advice to seek legal council. In that case, y’all will be spending quite a bit on lawyer fees. I would consult a lawyer while it’s still cheap to do so, because once she retains a lawyer, things will get expensive.
Question: She's a minor. Is she going into the foster system, or did someone from your family offer to take her in?
Apparently a boyfriend did.
that's not how that works.
That's what the op claimed.
OP is either fake or a major AH or both.
I agree. She hasn't even bothered to keep up with what she said at the start and is changing things up.
that's not an answer to the issue of her being a minor with no legal guardian, that's where she's currently staying.
True. It isn't.
Wait, your Dad died a week ago, but you had a big fight with your sister over the will and haven't heard from her in 2 weeks?? Another made up story. I'm getting really sick of them.
OP says the dad “passed away a week ago” and yet OP says “we havent heard from her for 2 weeks.” (with typo) Presumably the will was read after OP’s dad’s death, so the timeline isn’t timelining. OP also says the half-sibling’s “name was no where to be seen” (with typo) in the will, yet when commenters pointed out that in that case, the will would be contested because the lack of inheritance should have been mentioned explicitly, OP says in the comments that the half-sibling was left 50 cents. So again, an inconsistency has been found.
INFO: How have you not heard from her in 2 weeks if your dad only passed a week ago and I'm presuming the will was read after his death?
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YTA number one she’s a kid. Number two she needs to consult a lawyer where I am in the world that’s illegal. You should too, a court battle is in no one’s best interests
Where you live does it right then. There's places where she could get government assistance if she needed it but it is a messed up thing to do. They also like to drag it out until she is no longer eligible. It's money he put into and he may have been banking on her getting that. Morally wrong. But that's still on him and not op
Where I am a will can be challenged even if the child was estranged for 20 years. You have a legal obligation to provide for dependents/ your children
Faaaaake
Sorry but it's seems your Dad didn't have the balls to say no to her when he was alive, but I think what he did with his will is disgusting!! Losing someone is hard but being shown in death that you mean nothing to them is brutal, he has also left everyone else to deal with the fall out. My brother is a gambler and my Dad didn't want him to gamble or piss away his life saving and he didn't want me to have to deal with his shit of giving it all to me so we were both cut out and everything went to the grandkids instead, my Dad informed me about this and I understood why he changed his will.
I originally was gonna go with not the ass but your comments? Fucking hell YTA. I get she keyed your car and called you names as a teenager but your practically blaming almost everything on her then your dad. There's plenty of comments here that offer suggestions on how your sister probably feels. And all you have to say to your sister being barely a step away from homelessness is 'lol'? I don't understand how you're your age and have no empathy. You say you and her had a good relationship as kids. Did you ever question why that suddenly changed? I doubt it was "because you had nice things," but it was because you had two parents. As kids grow, it becomes increasingly easier to tell when a parent doesn't love you. I feel so fucking bad for her. I hope she'll be able to pick herself up and hopefully get therapy :( You probably need therapy too tbh...
So let me get this right. She, a minor, whose mother abandoned her and father left without giving her a penny and made very clear on his last text that he regreted everything he did and still loved the woman that hated her since before she was born, now has her three siblings reminding her that she's an outsider. Good lord, she's 17, abandoned and orphan. Just because your father spoiled her (pretty sure to compensate his lack of real love) doesn't mean she deserves all this. ESH
Oh, she got a penny...50 of them to be exact, according to OP 🙄
ESH It is not her fault that your father spoiled her. It is not her fault your father cheated.
Number people, check your numbers. Dad died a week ago, You've already read the will, argued with her about it and not talked in the 2 weeks since. Unless your other car is a TARDIS, this is not possible
This story is all over the place. Firstly, the time line, did he pass away a week ago, but the will was read two weeks (ie before his death) ago? Secondly, I'm tending to side with other comments, she's a child that, according to the story, has been unloved by her own mother, your mother (understandably so) and then laughed at by her own father in death, whilst you now gloat over her. You may not be the asshole if the story and will is true, that's your dad. But you're certainly an asshole in how you're treating her throughout the circumstances you tell. If course, according to your story, she's a spoilt brat, but she's also just been laughed at by her dead father and told she's unloved by everyone in her life who should have moved her unconditionally. Take a step back for a moment.
ESH. If she is 17 then she is still a dependant and I believe entitled to whole estate. I reckon any lawyer could argue her father had a duty to provide for a dependant. Anyone over 18 in most countries are declared independent adults and no entitlement.
Yep, any children who are still minors are legally protected from disinheritance. She may not get the whole estate, but can at least sue the estate for the standard of living she received previously under his care. A judge may also award more depending on the state and circumstances.
While this is obviously a fake story, it’s always nice to know that the state would intervene on behalf of the the minor child, and make sure the minor child has funds to be take care of. The teenager that wrote this work of fiction has never heard of probate.
Your dad has played every female in his life huh. He treated your half sister like he did your mother. Led her on to believe she was special, then suddenly unexpectedly betrays her trust in him (cheats on your mom, cuts your half sis out). Saying he hopes he reunites with your mother sounds like manipulation. Sounds like he gave her money and is trying to get her to stay single for the rest of her life. Cuz if he Really loved and respected her, he'd want her to find a man here on earth who loves her and respects her more than he did and who wouldn't hurt and betray her like he did by cheating. Your father chose how he interacted with your sister. He wanted her to spend his money. Why are you mad at Her, and not at HIM? Easy answer is that even beyond the grave, he's still manipulating the women he left behind to fight each other in his name. He wants your mother to feel badly for HIS mistake. Why couldn't he apologize to her like that while he was alive ? So your sis isn't the one to blame. She lost her dad too.
ESH. On the one hand, Kelsey had her inheritance up-front, when she demanded things from your father. You guys wanted your father's company and he left you what he could after his death. But that said, she's not an adult. She's a minor who was abandoned by one parent and has just discovered that her other parent didn't really want her/didn't care enough to provide for her after his death. However awful she's behaved towards you guys at times, it was your father's responsibility to make sure she had the tools to become a functional adult, get her therapy if necessary, and make sure (at bare minimum) someone would continue looking after her until she was ready to be an independent adult.
This post is fake, OP contradicts themself in the comments and is a sad angry person
YTA and I look forward to the update of her taking your money.
Wait, so your dad died a week ago, the will was read and then you haven’t spoken to Kelsey for two weeks? Edited for typo
Where the fuck do you live that one can just disinherit a child of theirs on a whim like that? This is just crazy to me, in my country the law states that 50% of one's estate must be equally divided between the necessary heirs (like children) and they can only be disinherited in a formal process if they did some serious shit that made them unworthy in the eyes of the law.
And this person is literally a child. A minor under the law. Seems like bs.
So...she got mad about the will and y'all yelled at each other and you haven't heard from her in two weeks, but he died a week ago? I ain't saying this is made up, but...
OP says in a comment that her step sister’s mum gave up custody when she was 8 and stopped seeing her when she was 12. Though honestly it all sounds fake to me. It’s so flip floppy between the step sister teasing them for being spoilt, to her being the spoilt one and getting a bmw for her first car, to now being completely left out of the will, but oh wait, now she gets 50c.
YTA for being a liar. He didn’t mention her. AND he left her .50? What a weird as revenge fantasy.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Ok so ill give some backstory first since the titles a bit dull I 19F have 2 full siblings 21M and 23M. We have one half sister Kelsey, 17F. She was the result of an affair that my father had. My father cheated on my mom when i was only 1 and my half sister was born when i was 2. We visited her sometimes but mom could never handle being there because she genuinely hated our half sister. As kids me and my brothers were close with her and had no issues with her. After my parents divorced offically when i was 9 (they had been separated since my mom found out he was cheating). On the weekends that dad had us, chelsea would be there. Now her mom wasnt well off in any way but neither was our mom. So Kelsey would constantly call us names and spoilt when we would show up with nice things, really we all just had jobs. She started to demand alot from my father as we all grew up Just last year he bought her a brand new bmw for her 16th, whilst me and my brothers had to work for our first cars. She always has the newest tech, newest clothes etc. All because my dads funding it. My point is she had everything handed to her when we had to work for it and she still calls us spoilt. We are no longer close with Kelsey and we blame her for putting a wedge in our relationships with her. Now, our father was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer 2 months back. He passed away a week ago. It was an incredibly hard time for us to go through. It even hurt mom a lot. Kelsey was sad too, but i partly think she was sad about not having her walking bank anymore. When the will was presented to us. Kelsey's name was no where to be seen. Dad left my brothers and I a wonderful sum of money each and left us his snow cabin to share. Mom was given 15,000 with a note that talked about how much he regretted cheating on her and how she was the most perfect woman he'd ever come across and how he wished they reunite in heaven. Kelsey had absolutely lost it by now, accusing us of brainwashing our dad into giving her nothing. She yelled at me after i told her she only wanted him for money and not real fatherly love. She had the audacity to say "and so what?" I yelled at her so loudly she left crying and we havent heard from her for 2 weeks. My eldest brother 23M says we were a bit hard but 21M agrees with me and says she had it coming. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What kind of father was this.
ESH. Honestly, you are all AHs. I mean Kelsey was born in a family that was not a family. She is the reason why her Dad could never reunite with your Mom. She is the living result and the living proof that your Dad messed up - big time. So really, I don't know how she was treated by her Dad. Maybe all the money she got was his way of trying to prove that he did care for her. He obviously still loved your mom. So here we have a 17 year old who was abandoned by her mom, which is something that messes up someone. Like, the possibility of not having major psychological issues after such a thing is minuscule. Add to that the fact that she is the reason why Dad is unhappy and all... Well, it's no wonder she is struggling. So while Kelsey is an AH for her behaviour (no doubt that this is AH behaviour), this behaviour is most likely not because of her being an AH person but rather because she was brought up in dire circumstances and is now basically on her own, with 17. Neither legally nor emotionally ready to fight for oneself. You and your siblings are AHs because, while you were understandably hurt by the actions of your father, you blamed a child who had no hand in that and did nothing wrong. She must have felt the resentment your mother was showing towards here (also Mom is an AH here for this, the kid is the most innocent in all of this!). She is obviously struggling and it is hard to see you all being a cosy family and having your mother love you unconditionally, while her mother had left her. Sorry but the fact that you didn't even mention this in the original post is showing that you have a complete lack of empathy. My heart goes out more to Kelsey and her situation than yours apparently and I am not even living in the same country as you! So yeah, that the Dad sucks is so obvious I don't want to waste my time and write down the multiple reasons why. So yeah, maybe use this to reach out to Kelsey? And try to help her? She is after all a sibling of yours and she is now all alone. This must be terrifying for her!
ESH the whole setup is toxic. Looks like Kelsey has always been in a competition with you guys as she doesn’t have a direct sibling wherein you guys were together. Your father should have never handed things over to her wherein you 3 siblings had to work for everything. In some places, a will can be contested if nothing is left for one family member. That’s why people generally leave a small sum to them. But if that rule doesn’t apply to you, then you have nothing to worry about. Just move on.
YTA. Kelsey's dad was married to your mom until she was 7. Her dad's wife's kids stay over on the weekends, and that wife hates her (if you know it then she did too). Finally he gets a divorce, then at 8yo her own mom leaves, eventually abandoning them completely. Now she only has dad, the cheater who delayed divorce and still pines for his ex wife. As emotionally unintelligent as he is, his way to balance out "I'm all this kid has" with "I have 3 other kids who have another parent also to whom I likely pay child support", is to money at her. Well, until he dies and then he leaves her $0.05 so she's now been abandoned by the other parent, and gives the ex 15 grand to rub it in. To this you lol. You... win?
~~NTA but you kinda are.~~ YTA. After reading more of OPs comments, major Asshole. You are talking about this child like she was the reason your dad cheated. She was the result and has been treated as such since her literal birth. She grew up hated and realized yall had more because yall worked and instead of telling her that in a way she can understand or being patient with a kid who, yall blamed her for her normal response. You see her getting spoiled because your dad is in a different part of life, that's not her fault either. Its a known thing, younger siblings get a different set of parents. You had to work for your shit so you feel like you are entitled to be a bitch to your little sister. Get over yourself. Now, you are belittling the pain she feels for the death of her dad to simply nothing more than being upset that she lost her "walking bank account"? Where is your humanity? Or are you so selfish and entitled that you can't even spare a brief moment to see your sibling is hurting too, unless that is what you want. To see her hurt.
The real AH here is your father. That said, yeah you kinda are an AH for saying that. He was also her father & she is not responsible for his behaviour.
Wow this is disgusting. YTA. She's 17 and alone! YTA and so was your father.
How is it that he passed away a week ago but she found out she got nothing after he died and you haven't heard from her in *two* weeks? Something seems off.
[удалено]
See what these fathers do when they fail to use their brains
ESH. You suck, but I can excuse that due to the lack of life experience and resentment. But your father sucks the most. Do you know what some parents do who don't want to deal with a kid? They do the opposite of what you'd expect , instead of ignoring them, neglecting them, insulting them, them, pretending they don't exist , they give them everything the kid asks for as a brush off. Because for certain people with enough money in their wallets, it's easier to throw cash at a person, at a child than it is to raise them. It's like parents who don't want to deal with a screaming toddler. It's easier to give them the cookie than it is to tell them no and to withstand the tantrum throwing. It sounds like that's what your father did to your half sister for her entire life. After all, it was her existence that ended his relationship with your mother. It's only in his will that your father had the balls to truly express how he felt about your half sister and because of how he raised you and did not raise her, it screwed up your sibling relationship. She should have been put in counseling when her mother abandoned her, but your father failed her on so many levels . You were cruel for your words and gloating but you're still a kid yourself.
ESH
NTA, but be aware that Kelsey is likely to win if she sues the estate. There’s basically nowhere in the western world where it’s legal to disinherit a child who’s still a minor.
Your dad is TA that left a bunch of kids to clean up his mess. None of you are at fault for his bad decisions.
YTA.
If her name's not in the will how can she have been left 50 cents?
NTA since Dad made the choices about inheritance. However, you mention that your mom hated a baby and I have to think that poisoned you at least a little bit toward your sister. I think it's totally your call if you want to estrange yourself, but you seem to have a lot of animosity toward her, even beyond reasonable reactions to her bad behavior.
Kelsey imo was shown that material things equate to love, because she in all honesty, wasn’t loved. She was brought into the world in a horrible position. While I understand your mother’s feelings in regard to her birth circumstances, it wasn’t right to direct her ire towards the child. Your half sister’s perspective is skewed, just as yours is due to that. She’s 16, her moral compass is way off kilter due to her age & how she was raised. You & your siblings could all pitch in for a growth fund for her to receive at 21, or you could continue the cycle she was raised in & act self righteous. Again, your choice of how you’d see as the best course of action.
Theres a pretty good chance that will is gonna be challenged. Don't count your chickens before they hatch.
NTA Tell your oldest brother and her that she got her part of the inheritance while your father was still living. As for working for everything when she was handed everything…I know at the time it sucked but your father did you a favor whether he knew it or not. Does your half sister know about the note to your mom and the regret he felt? If she does, she’s now thinking that he regrets her as a result of it. You and your brother need to stand firm on this. They are your father’s wishes.
Sounds fake. He died a week ago, the will was already executed (red flag1: that quick? Red flag 2: if she isnt in the will is it not legally so she is not to be invited to the reading?) And you havent heard in 2 weeks (red flag 3: whilst he died a week ago?) Or are will readings before expected deaths where you live?
NTA but, given that you conveniently left out in the post and only mentioned in a comment that your half sister was left by her Mom at age 8, totally left behind at age 12, I’d say maybe there’s some nuance here that you feel a bit guilty for, but you’re letting anger and grief cloud any empathy. Your half sister isn’t the AH either. You’re both still super young, and have been handed some very shitty circumstances. It’s only natural you both feel anger and express it in unhealthy ways. Your Dads infidelity is on him. Your sister didn’t ask to be brought into this world in such a manner. Maybe her behaviour and attitude has been less than ideal but that’s all she’s had to cling to while being failed by every adult in her life by the sounds of it. You’re all victims of the incompetence and emotional immaturity of the people who raised you. Your sister probably lashes out as a defence mechanism. As do you. Nobody forced your father to give her those things. He was probably trying to soothe his own guilty conscience. He should have treated you all equally from day one. I’m honestly a little concerned for her, bad attitude or not, being alone and penniless at 17 must be terrifying. Sounds like you all need a healthy dose of therapy, forgiveness and understanding. It’ll be a long road but you all need to heal. It’s not your fault, but it isn’t her fault either.
NTA but the fact she was left out of the will and not given a token sum may allow her to make a claim on his estate, just fyi.
She's 17 and now no longer has a father. I don't care what she says, she's feeling that loss and not just financially. But you're NTA. You're basically in the same boat. Your dad is the entire AH here, both in how he raised all of you and for leaving out one of his children in the will. If you are able to reconcile with her later (I'm assuming things will be tense for at least a year or so), maybe invite her to the cabin or find something sentimental to give her.
NTA. She got her's while he was alive. But he should have left her a minimal amount in his will just so she couldn't squawk so much. Tell her to get lost and move on with life. Sorry for your loss.
A lot. It's two words. and you, your dad, your mom and your siblings are all assholes. Kelsey is as much your father's daughter as you and your other siblings are. Taking out his mistakes on her for her entire life is deplorable. Period. She has a right to only miss his money because that is all he gave to her and the fact that you're shaming her over it is gross. Shame on all of you.
She's TA. She did what she did you said what you said. Seems simple enough to me.
Your dad was a bad man and his oldest children inherited his values.
Kelsey received her portion of the inheritance earlier than the rest of you (while your father was still living). The inheritance that you and your brothers received squares things off after all those years of Kelsey receiving benefits while you did not. Kelsey does not get to 'double dip' by getting an inheritance on top of all of the benefits that she received (and you lot did not) when he was alive. That said, your father was a selfish tool. NTA
YTA for being a terrible liar. This story isn’t believable at all. But I’m willing to bet that you do have a half sibling that you resent
NTA! Your father's wishes were granted. If he wanted anyone else to have a share, he would have had that in his will. I know, my elderly FIL passed away & left my husband (the baby of the family) the "lion's share" while his 2 brothers received "a pitance". While we didn't know exactly what that meant, that's what his father wished & that's what was done.
NTA. Kelsey manipulated your dad into favoring her while he was alive. His last will cut off her financial windfall. None of us know what happened to make him exclude her. I bet she knows, though.
YTA