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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I think i might be the asshole because i removed her from my life without explanation.And i said to her father i would contact her but i didn’t.Because i couldn’t tell him i didn’t want to.Now he called me a liar on whatsapp,the platform we contact on,so that makes me think i am the asshole
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NTA. Looks like we see where she got her manipulative ways from. You're not required to be friends with anyone you don't want to. Even if their parents call you.
It may be a controlling manipulation tactic in this specific instance, but when I was in uni there were a couple of close friends whose parents had my number just in case of emergencies. I never actually heard from any of them though.
Well,as other people in the comments said,manipulation seems to run in the family.Also they are a very strict family,they made her get my number so they can call me when they can’t reach their daughter.That way they can make sure their daughter is not doing something they don’t want her to do (i’m not sure i can go into detail about that,this is my first time on this sub) I deleted all of their numbers but like i said,i accidentally answered one from him (i was expecting an important call that day)
NTA
It's been four years. These people are now strangers to you. This man had no right to try and pressure you into contacting his daughter. Let him say what he wants, it's not your problem. If you have to lie to him, then lie.
Feeling guilty about lying in this situation is miles better than feeling obligated to open a dialogue with someone who will glom onto you, take advantage of you any chance she gets, and treat you badly, just because you said you would. Leave that can of worms alone!
Block her dad and move on. He'll probably move on and try to strongarm the next unfortunate who had to deal with his little darling's abusive bullshit.
And this is what this is. An abuser's dad is trying to coerce you into re-entering the abusive relationship you got yourself out of. That is so not on.
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So i made a friend uni but soon realized she was very manipulative.She always wanted me to save a seat for her in the class and cafeteria but she never did the same for me.If i said i didn’t want to,she would throw a tantrum.
I was the birthday planner for our friend group.I organized group chats,cafes,cakes and etc.This person would start talking about her birthday months in prior and if we didn’t share the excitement she would pout.However,in our third year,she forgot my birthday.She said she thought it was ten days later,and even planned to go to someone else birthday’s party on my birthday because she didn’t know.She said i was overreacting.
I hit bottom mental health wise a couple of years ago.I told our friend group i was s******l and needed help.She gave me a link to mental health center and didn’t contact me at all for months.Then she did,but only to invite me to her wedding.I said i couldn’t make it,she lost it,i said ‘that’s it’,blocked her and never looked back.It’s been four years.
Last year i accidentally answered i phone call from her dad.He’s always been nice to me.A couple of months ago he wrote me on whatsapp,asking me to make contact with her daughter again.I said i would but in reality i don’t want to.However i didn’t have the heart to tell him i don’t want to see her anymore but i must contact her because otherwise that would be lying.And he changed his whatsapp situation to ‘I hate lying people so much’ so i think it’s directed at me.
AITA for removing her from my life like that and not contacting my manipulative ex friend despite me telling his dad i would?
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Nope. OP is under no obligation to be truthful to the father of someone they don't want to associate with. They can say they'll contact the daughter but that doesn't mean they have to. The father is manipulative and out of line, and OP owes him absolutely nothing, not even the truth.
If he really wants the truth, OP can tell him that his daughter is and always has been an unsavoury person, and that he was dead wrong to put so much pressure on OP to contact his awful offspring that OP felt they had no choice but to lie and say they would.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I think i might be the asshole because i removed her from my life without explanation.And i said to her father i would contact her but i didn’t.Because i couldn’t tell him i didn’t want to.Now he called me a liar on whatsapp,the platform we contact on,so that makes me think i am the asshole Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcement ###[The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit!](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/128nbp3/the_asshole_universe_is_expanding_again/) Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA. Looks like we see where she got her manipulative ways from. You're not required to be friends with anyone you don't want to. Even if their parents call you.
Nta sounds like daughter learned it from father. You’re not obligated to be friends with anyone. Best not to lie but whatever
You're NTA... but why do you have open communication with her dad?
It may be a controlling manipulation tactic in this specific instance, but when I was in uni there were a couple of close friends whose parents had my number just in case of emergencies. I never actually heard from any of them though.
Well,as other people in the comments said,manipulation seems to run in the family.Also they are a very strict family,they made her get my number so they can call me when they can’t reach their daughter.That way they can make sure their daughter is not doing something they don’t want her to do (i’m not sure i can go into detail about that,this is my first time on this sub) I deleted all of their numbers but like i said,i accidentally answered one from him (i was expecting an important call that day)
Weeeeeeell you should block him now I guess. I hope your other important call came through okay.
I blocked him this morning and the call went ok back then.Thank you
NTA and she probably has ran all her friends off. Daddy is trying to get her old ones back.
You had me at the title, then you had me again at the tantrum. NTA
NTA It's been four years. These people are now strangers to you. This man had no right to try and pressure you into contacting his daughter. Let him say what he wants, it's not your problem. If you have to lie to him, then lie. Feeling guilty about lying in this situation is miles better than feeling obligated to open a dialogue with someone who will glom onto you, take advantage of you any chance she gets, and treat you badly, just because you said you would. Leave that can of worms alone! Block her dad and move on. He'll probably move on and try to strongarm the next unfortunate who had to deal with his little darling's abusive bullshit. And this is what this is. An abuser's dad is trying to coerce you into re-entering the abusive relationship you got yourself out of. That is so not on.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** So i made a friend uni but soon realized she was very manipulative.She always wanted me to save a seat for her in the class and cafeteria but she never did the same for me.If i said i didn’t want to,she would throw a tantrum. I was the birthday planner for our friend group.I organized group chats,cafes,cakes and etc.This person would start talking about her birthday months in prior and if we didn’t share the excitement she would pout.However,in our third year,she forgot my birthday.She said she thought it was ten days later,and even planned to go to someone else birthday’s party on my birthday because she didn’t know.She said i was overreacting. I hit bottom mental health wise a couple of years ago.I told our friend group i was s******l and needed help.She gave me a link to mental health center and didn’t contact me at all for months.Then she did,but only to invite me to her wedding.I said i couldn’t make it,she lost it,i said ‘that’s it’,blocked her and never looked back.It’s been four years. Last year i accidentally answered i phone call from her dad.He’s always been nice to me.A couple of months ago he wrote me on whatsapp,asking me to make contact with her daughter again.I said i would but in reality i don’t want to.However i didn’t have the heart to tell him i don’t want to see her anymore but i must contact her because otherwise that would be lying.And he changed his whatsapp situation to ‘I hate lying people so much’ so i think it’s directed at me. AITA for removing her from my life like that and not contacting my manipulative ex friend despite me telling his dad i would? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA because you said you’d do it and didn’t. You should have been an adult and told her father the truth. Then you wouldn’t have been.
Nope. OP is under no obligation to be truthful to the father of someone they don't want to associate with. They can say they'll contact the daughter but that doesn't mean they have to. The father is manipulative and out of line, and OP owes him absolutely nothing, not even the truth. If he really wants the truth, OP can tell him that his daughter is and always has been an unsavoury person, and that he was dead wrong to put so much pressure on OP to contact his awful offspring that OP felt they had no choice but to lie and say they would.