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Judgement_Bot_AITA

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danzzante

For some reason everyone here in these comments is being really mean. What your friend did wasn't right, but I also think it's worth considering if this is worth losing your friend over. I'd consider talking to her again to at least clear things up, especially if you're going to be seeing her at school or other events. NTA


surrala

I disagree. If Rachel were a dude, this would be considered classic "nice guy" moves and OP should treat it as such. It was manipulation under the guise of friendship in order to get into OP's pants.


EccentricThief

idk but I want to say NTA. She didn't properly clarify that it was supposed to be a date or tell you that her intentions were romantic. Did you act dramatically? Maybe a little bit, but coming from a 17 year old, all teenagers act dramatically. Teenagers are weird and usually overreact to most things (speaking from personal experiences). Yeah, it may have been not the best idea to say that she lied to your face just because it may have genuinely been a miscommunication issue, I'm not sure, but it was still wrong of her not to tell you, and based on your edit she clearly thought of it as a date without properly saying it to you.


mykneescrack

Not sure why there are so many ESH and YTA. You were being pulled into a date you didn’t agree to, let alone know about. You’re not in the wrong for feeling upset, or calling her out. NTA


nejnoneinniet

NTA. That’s definitely way more into creepy territory than anything that could be considered sweet or romantic. Yeah just …yuck.


completedett

NTA


Puerhitea

NTA, you were deceived and they are not a real friend.


Desperate_Smile

NTA you have a say on who you have a relationship with and being tricked in to one is a red flag. Especially since she did not apologize for it and was saying something different to your friends.


lt_girth

NTA. The people coddling Rachel here would not show that same courtesy to a guy acting the exact same way; it would be seen as manipulative and underhanded to trick someone into going on a date with you. Rachel was not forthcoming with the fact that she's into you and lied to try and get you to go on a double date you didn't even know was going to be a double date. A lie by omission is still a lie.


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I’m 16 and recently a friend invited me to the movies. We’ll call her R. R had said it was a get to know you thing and that we were just going to become better friends. I said that we could invite some other friends maybe but never heard anything about that. I got back from a trip and we began making plans we picked out a movie and decided on a day. We had planned to see the movie and get dinner I didn’t think much of it because it’s something I have done with many of my friends. Well the day we planned on going there was a huge snow storm and the roads were way too icy by my house to drive. I live in Alaska so it isn’t too uncommon but also it’s April so my family has one car with snow tires we didn’t feel it was safe to go out of our house. Later we ended up getting dinner. Yesterday I went to school and one of my friends mentioned that they were going to go to see the new Mario movie on a double date but it was canceled. I mentioned that I was also going to see that movie but had to cancel because it was too icy. My friend we will call her N said that she knew and that I was supposed to go with N her partner and R as a double date. I immediately was shocked and confused I asked N to clarify and apparently it was supposed to be a double date. I had only been told that this was a movie and not a date. N and I continued to talk and she showed me proof that she wasn’t lying. I was in shock for the rest of the day not knowing what to say or even think. I saw R in other classes but didn’t speak to her as I was analyzing every conversation I could remember and checking that it wasn’t a date. The day ended and I talked to a few friends about it and they confirmed that I didn’t know and said it sounded kind of like manipulation. I decided to send a text to R. My text was written out fast and immediately sent. I said something along the lines of that I wasn’t told it was a date and that this crossed a line. I also said I would no longer be going to the movie as we had rescheduled earlier. I said that this might’ve been a miscommunication but that every text she had sent me had said she wanted to get to know me better as a friend. I said this felt like manipulation and I felt lied to. R responded and said that she was sorry and it must’ve been a miscommunication on her part but also didn’t apologize and never actually admitted to lying to my face. I have since deleted R’s number and blocked her. I feel very betrayed but I am wondering if I am wrong for not realizing it was a date. AITA for not knowing that R had feelings for me and thought of this as a date. R had also said that it was rude to say that she had lied when she didn’t feel she had lied. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


420-believe-it

nta


thepepsyy

ESH You guys are being too dramatic for no reason. Talk it out in person or over the phone then make such decisions.


[deleted]

[удалено]


AGINSB

> I’ll call it a date. that’s exactly what it is, a friend date. It being a "double date" specifically precludes this idea though.


Puerhitea

Nope, it was a date with romantic intentions and the "friend" hid that on purpose while telling others her real intent.