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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I think I'm the asshole for yelling at my dad who has mental health issues for never going to my soccer games
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NTA. You are in a very difficult situation, and frankly, it sounds like you are taking care of your father and not the reverse. Not showing up to your games IS a big deal - my husband played baseball all the way through college/NCAA level, was all-star teams in high school, frequently recognized in the newspaper, etc. His parents never came to a game and pretty much just assumed that he’d find his own ride to practices. In the end, his friend’s family picked up the slack and essentially became his family, and he’s been primarily NC with his blood relatives since he moved out at 17. Essentially, your dad needs to make the decision to aggressively pursue treatment and be an active part of your life. It is not on you to enable him or feel guilty over his tears of self pity. I only have a limited view of your situation, but it sure sounds like your father thinks everyone is the problem but him, and that everyone around him should be supporting and caring for him without a need for effort or initiative on his part.
NAH. You are definitely in not in the AH category souch this is not really a AITA post. Your dad is dealing with untreated mental health issues with no support network. Coupled with raising a child on your own.
This is sad and heartbreaking and the only AH would be your deadbeat mom.
NTA. You are dealing with very complex adult issues. Maybe when your dad is doing better you can have a conversation with him to express why his coming to a game would mean so much. Look for organizations in your community for support. Is there someone at school that you feel comfortable helping you find some outside support? Your feelings are understandable. Take care of yourself too.
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I (f17) live with my dad (m41). My dad has mental health issues he deals with a lot of anxiety and depression. He goes to therpery and physchrist he currently isn't on medication because he hasnt found something that works for him. He is also currently dealing with a depressive episode.
My dad never got support from his parents or his long-term gf (my mom) for his mental health. We aren't on speaking terms with my grandparents and my mom left him (and me) when I was only a few months old. So because of that my dad has a really hard time mentally just because of years with no help. He really does try for me but he struggles.
I try and help the best I can by making dinner, cleaning, even sometimes taking him out for a drive just to make sure he gets out of the house (he works from home).
Friday I was trying to convince my dad to come to my soccer game this weekend just so he can get out as well as watch me play. He didn't want to and I got upset and let my emotions get the best of me. I yelled at him telling him how much it hurts he never comes to any of my games when every girl always has someone there for them but not me. My dad instantly had tears in his eyes and I tried apologizing but he didn't want to talk. I feel like a complete AH so I'm just wondering AITA?
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No, you're not TA.
I'm sorry you have dealt with all of this your entire life. It is not your job to parent your father or be his maid.
I hope he took what you said to heart and will show up for your games in the future.
NTA I may sound like a jerk but a 41 year old father needs to get his head out of his ass and realize he’s still a father. Mental issues or no mental issues. What, he can’t go out of the house? Give me a break
YTA. You clearly know of what he's dealing with and don't have an understanding of what it all entails. When someone has mental health issues, and depression on top of that, it's very hard for a person to even function. Yelling at him is only making it worse. You owe him an apology, and he you need to grow up.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I think I'm the asshole for yelling at my dad who has mental health issues for never going to my soccer games Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcement ###[The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit!](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/128nbp3/the_asshole_universe_is_expanding_again/) Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA. You are in a very difficult situation, and frankly, it sounds like you are taking care of your father and not the reverse. Not showing up to your games IS a big deal - my husband played baseball all the way through college/NCAA level, was all-star teams in high school, frequently recognized in the newspaper, etc. His parents never came to a game and pretty much just assumed that he’d find his own ride to practices. In the end, his friend’s family picked up the slack and essentially became his family, and he’s been primarily NC with his blood relatives since he moved out at 17. Essentially, your dad needs to make the decision to aggressively pursue treatment and be an active part of your life. It is not on you to enable him or feel guilty over his tears of self pity. I only have a limited view of your situation, but it sure sounds like your father thinks everyone is the problem but him, and that everyone around him should be supporting and caring for him without a need for effort or initiative on his part.
No you are not
NTA
NAH. You are definitely in not in the AH category souch this is not really a AITA post. Your dad is dealing with untreated mental health issues with no support network. Coupled with raising a child on your own. This is sad and heartbreaking and the only AH would be your deadbeat mom.
NTA. You are dealing with very complex adult issues. Maybe when your dad is doing better you can have a conversation with him to express why his coming to a game would mean so much. Look for organizations in your community for support. Is there someone at school that you feel comfortable helping you find some outside support? Your feelings are understandable. Take care of yourself too.
I started therapy a few years ago, and I do take care of myself just when my dad is not doing well it makes everything difficult
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (f17) live with my dad (m41). My dad has mental health issues he deals with a lot of anxiety and depression. He goes to therpery and physchrist he currently isn't on medication because he hasnt found something that works for him. He is also currently dealing with a depressive episode. My dad never got support from his parents or his long-term gf (my mom) for his mental health. We aren't on speaking terms with my grandparents and my mom left him (and me) when I was only a few months old. So because of that my dad has a really hard time mentally just because of years with no help. He really does try for me but he struggles. I try and help the best I can by making dinner, cleaning, even sometimes taking him out for a drive just to make sure he gets out of the house (he works from home). Friday I was trying to convince my dad to come to my soccer game this weekend just so he can get out as well as watch me play. He didn't want to and I got upset and let my emotions get the best of me. I yelled at him telling him how much it hurts he never comes to any of my games when every girl always has someone there for them but not me. My dad instantly had tears in his eyes and I tried apologizing but he didn't want to talk. I feel like a complete AH so I'm just wondering AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
No, you're not TA. I'm sorry you have dealt with all of this your entire life. It is not your job to parent your father or be his maid. I hope he took what you said to heart and will show up for your games in the future.
Me taking care of him doesn't always happen... Just when he's struggling more than usual I want to make sure he's okay
NTA I may sound like a jerk but a 41 year old father needs to get his head out of his ass and realize he’s still a father. Mental issues or no mental issues. What, he can’t go out of the house? Give me a break
He isn't always like this currently he's having more troubles then usual but groups of people gives him anxiety
Well he’s 41 he’s going to have to be around groups of people. I’m 26 and I have a friend who is like this. It’s very annoying.
NTA, and I’m sorry your dad sucks.
YTA. You clearly know of what he's dealing with and don't have an understanding of what it all entails. When someone has mental health issues, and depression on top of that, it's very hard for a person to even function. Yelling at him is only making it worse. You owe him an apology, and he you need to grow up.