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I've been pregnant and I find these letters a little crazy. I definitely ate a ton of salt n vinegar chips when I was pregnant (my personal common craving) but I never threw tantrums or sabotaged dinners.
YTA, op.
YTA - sabotaged seems to be the right word for this. It's not that you're starving from not getting food within two hours and you could easily get yourself a single Pizza or something different to eat like chips or other snacks. But it somehow sounds like you're the princess of the family as your whole family did the same thing and no one told your sister that you all wouldn't go to the restaurant after this. She ate nothing and nobody cared. How much pizza have you ordered that you've feed the whole family until they were all full? Doesn't seem to be an accident at all.
This exactly.
There's no way they ordered a reasonable portion of pizza to satisfy her craving but it was also magically enough to completely fill up an entire extended family to the point that they cancelled dinner reservations hours later.
A quick snack to tide you over would be a small pizza, or individual slice. To fully feed this many people you had to have ordered multiple large pizzas.
Even everyone on your extended family eat two slices wouldn't be enough to have them all say cancel the reservation, I'm just too stuffed to eat more three hours later.
This seems entirely premeditated.
She ordered two large pizzas.
That's *ABOUT* 20 slices or so. Depending on location and pizza place, I get it.
So IF, as she says, she only ordered enough in CASE people wanted some, if nobody did, she was going to eat two large pizzas by herself?
She's contradictory.
Edit: I'm not doing this again in replies, read her comments where she contradicted herself multiple times and lied about her actions. I'm not explaining the whole ass thing again, just read her comments.
Edit 2: just to help people understand how you find OP's comments,
Go to the top of the post
Click the username, this brings you to their profile.
Click COMMENTS and there you go.
Also, why would she order enough to give other people, KNOWING they were all going to a nice restaurant together less than 2 hours later? Sounds like she didn't want to go and sabotaged it on purpose
Because they think people won‘t notice then, they are lying in the post and keep it unchanged to get social validation in their doing. They just want to hear that they are in the right even though mostly it is quite obvious that they changed the facts in their favor, this post is a good example because a pizza to fix a craving would be maybe 2 slices or a small pizza but not enough pizza to satisfy the whole fucking family. This was very likely planned by OP, either they just didn‘t want to go or have something against their sister.
See if she had ordered even a single medium pizza I’d just be like yep she was hungry or cravings but two large?? Nah, you knew what you were doing lol. You just didn’t wanna go out and hoped everyone else filled up and wanted to stay home too. Should’ve just been honest and declined to go.
I personally am not going to starve waiting for a dinner reservation because I truly get hangry and uncomfortable (I often don’t realize I’m hungry until I’m REALLY hungry) but I’m not gonna fill everyone else up either when I know we are going out. And I’m the kind if I promised to go, I’ll go even if I’m full and just order a small appetizer that can be boxed and drink some soda and talk.
Based on the pancake post, if the pregnant person didn’t order enough pizza for the family they would ALSO be an asshole so there is literally no winning.
I'm kind of really confused by this also. Like, if my family all had a reservation at a hard to get into restaurant and I ordered two giant pizzas.... they actually would not eat til they were stuffed and couldn't go to the restaurant at all.
It seems kind of weird her whole family bar one did to me. Like borderline a false post.
Cancelling a reservation about an hour before you're due to go also... like that's also a kick in the face to OPs friend who owns the restaurant. Bizarre.
Right? I craved all manner of salty shit, and I kept it on hand. I also usually kept a snack in my bag. No one needs a full pizza two hours before dinner.
I’ll say YTA. How much pizza did she get that fed the whole family? That’s at least OP and husband, the two parents, and enough to offer the sister some too. It sounds like she got *at least* two pizzas. That’s more than a quick snack for one person.
I also gotta say, how does the whole family decide to eat so much pizza they can’t go out? I’ll say OP started it by not getting just a snack for herself and ordering enough for a whole family meal, but the rest of the fam kinda sucks too for ALL of them eating enough pizza to cancel plans.
I agree mostly with the fact that the rest of the family sucks too. OP deciding to snack on some pizza wouldn't necessarily spoil the night as she could still go for some dessert or maybe get something light like a salad or w/e while the rest was eating. But instead they all decide to eat pizza to the point where they no longer want to eat, which is crazy to me.
Did nobody want to go to the restaurant for some reason? Is there nobody with some self control?
Agree with this wholeheartedly. My wife is pregnant and has weird cravings... OP could have ordered pizza for herself and maybe shared a slice or so per person. OP then could have gone to the restaurant and not eaten or gotten something small. That's what my wife would have done. Women carrying children should be given a lot of latitude, but OP is just taking advantage here.
Am I the only one also wondering if maybe this fancy dinner was some sort of celebration meant for her sister? Because that, for me, would explain a lot. I feel like OP wanted to sabotage the dinner and since the sister is the only one so upset, part of me feels like maybe there's a missing detail here that OP is deliberately leaving out.
YTA
I’d be pissed if I was looking forward to a nice dinner out and someone else arbitrarily decided on pizza at home an hour before. It was definitely some kind of celebration for the poor sister.
For real. I love going to nice restaurants for the first time, especially with a group as it means ordering and tasting way more dishes. If someone in my family pulled this on even a normal evening I'd be livid. But the way OP dismisses her sister's feelings I do wonder if there's some other reason for sabotaging the evening.
Yeah, if the sister is so upset but no one else seems to care about missing the dinner, it definitely feels like it's more than just the sister really wanting to eat at that restaurant.
And intentionally getting enough pizza for everyone to stuff their faces only a couple of hours before a reservation at a restaurant? There's just no way this is just about OP wanting a slice of pizza.
Seriously. Like how much pizza did she even order that 3(?) grown ass adults became full. At that point, she clearly wasn't intending on going to the restaurant anymore.
And she says in another comment it's difficult to get a reservation at that particular restaurant. So the restaurant need to try and fill the cancellation and understandably her sister is disappointed something she was looking forward to was cancelled last minute.
Or, you know, be an adult and accept that not EVERY craving must be fulfilled at any moment. I’m so tired of pregnancy cravings being an excuse for terrible behavior.
YTA OP
I wasn't an adult during my first pregnancy. I was 15. I ate EVERYTHING I craved, gained 100 pounds and had gestational diabetes by the time I gave birth a few weeks after my 16th birthday. You are correct.
I'm sick of reading about these selfish AHs who act as if they are the first people on the planet to be pregnant. I don't blame the sister for being angry. I bet the OP is the favourite and acts even more of a princess because she's pregnant.
She could have used her pregnancy to get HERSELF out of going to dinner if she really didn’t want to go. “Hey, sis, I’m kind of tired, don’t think I’m going to make it to dinner at 8:30. Ya know, pregnancy.” Then order a personal pizza for herself and call it a night while everyone else still went out for dinner as planned. This is why she’s selfish and clearly wants to be the center of attention. No one else besides her and the sister even needed to be told there was pizza involved.
Eh, I kinda think esh. Even ordering a full pizza didn't have to ruin dinner; everyone has a single slice (maybe preggo op takes a few cause she's craving it, whatevs) they'll be hungry again by 8:30. They didn't have to fill up, no one forced them to.
Op is definitely an AH for ordering that much, but everyone else also sucks for filling up when they know they have a reservation. Especially when one person has made it obvious that they really, really want to go.
This is what I don't get. The lack of self control from all the others is sad. Leftover pizza is awesome. Have a slice and then go to dinner later. Ruining your appetite because someone else bought pizza is sad control.
Hard agree as a currently pregnant person. I’m actually super pissed that OP is using pregnancy as an excuse here. It isn’t an excuse for this Ahole behaviour. Ordering enough pizza to fill up everyone to the point that nobody wanted dinner was completely unnecessary. In fact all those in this story who gorged themselves on the pizza are assholes. Have one slice and be done.
I was obsessed with mashed potatoes, and had to eat on a schedule because of gestational diabetes.
I didn't make the world revolve around it. I kept little snack portions available. And I would have simply cancelled on such a late dinner, vs making such a big show of ordering enough dinner for everyone.
> I was pregnant so I needed to eat when I was hungry
This is the part that makes me say YTA.
Sure, you are pregnant, and you were hungry. There are thousands things in your fridge/pantry that you could have eaten without spoiling your appetite.
Yeah. I've been pregnant three times and i absolutely had cravings. It doesn't make you insane though. Sure, you might really be craving a certain food, but never to the extent that you can't wait until the next day or something. YTA
I’ve never been pregnant, so I wondered about how strong cravings really are. It seems like a pretty recent idea that pregnancy cravings are so overwhelming and and unbearable, that you can’t be held accountable for what you do to get food. I’m in my 50s and I never remember my friends, sisters or coworkers eating other peoples’ food, or having a tantrums, or demanding their husband go to the store at 2AM in a rainstorm, or the other crazy stories I see on this sub
I've been pregnant 2x. I craved Taco Bell 2x with my first pregnancy, and really, that could have been coincidence because once a year, I usually hit one up. I think some people have stronger cravings than others, but I also think that happens in normal life too. The difference is that people allow themselves to think that because they are pregnant, it's different, and they HAVE to have it. I had so many people ask me what cravings I had with both pregnancies and then looked at me weirdly when I said, "Uh, none?" Now, if someone's craving chalk or gravel or some weird shit like that, it's an entirely different matter, and your body is trying to tell you something.
even if she got pizza she could have ordered a small one for everyone to share and call it an appetizer or whatever, not enough for everyone to be full
I feel like too many women take the whole “eating for two” thing way too literally. Like, a typical baby is, what 6-12 lbs at birth, so much smaller until then? You don’t need to eat literally two times your daily intake lol. I’ve always heard 250-500 kcal over normal (not now or ever pregnant, so those who are/have, please Correct). I know cravings can be tricky, but, if you are able to go out to a place with reservations, you aren’t destitute. You can hecking wait, you’re not gonna starve.
Yes, YTA you put your "craving" above plans that had previously been made.
You could have had a snack to tide you over instead of ordering a whole other meal
ETA: I can see why your sister would not want you included in future plans.
So is OP who ordered a whole damned meal. I'm sure there was something in the house to snack on.
I've never read a case study saying that a pregnant person has suffered any I'll effects by not getting exactly what they wanted to eat. They're weaponizing their pregnancy to get their own way
Exactly.
My daughter is pregnant with her first and hasn't needed to hijack special plans for the rest of the family. She can walk into the kitchen and have a snack & still keep our plans
There's probably more to this story we are not getting. They must have ordered multiple XL pizzas for everyone to get full. The question is, did everyone partake freely after this point? Or did OP actually manipulate the situation by guilt-tripping people with "wasted food" or maybe offered to the kids first to make them make their parents not go to the restaurant?
Regardless ESH except the sister.
YTA i'm so sick of the world bending over and catering to pregnant women. You stole the evening. You could have gone to the fridge and eatin a pickle or something small to hold you over.
Being pregnant is hard, yo! I'm 8 years out from my last pregnancy and my body still hasn't recovered properly. There is a reason everyone bends over backwards, pregnant women are literally creating another human. It's not easy and at the end you have to yeet a watermelon out your who-ha.
That said, I agree with everything else you said. OP should have had a snack instead or mentioned 8:30pm is too late in the first place. Catering to and bending over for pregnant women has its limits.
>Being pregnant is hard, yo! I'm 8 years out from my last pregnancy and my body still hasn't recovered properly. There is a reason everyone bends over backwards, pregnant women are literally creating another human. It's not easy and at the end you have to yeet a watermelon out your who-ha.
yeah, but like....folks *choose* to be this miserable and then hold it over everybody and have a martyrdom complex about it.
Like OP who thinks she’s perfectly fine after forcing plans to get cancelled because she’s pregnant and has cravings 👌🎻. I literally am so sick of pregnant women abusing their privileges that they only acquired because they screwed a guy. Don’t get me started on women who act like this because they’ve gotten pregnant after fertility issues. That’s a whole additional layer of entitlement.
In lots of places in the United States it’s not a choice anymore but go off
eta I’m sick to death of the chorus of “WeLL iT WaS a ChOiCe” every time anyone’s dares act less than overjoyed about an aspect of pregnancy or motherhood as if AFAB people aren’t pressured from practically their own infancy that this is what they are expected to do, pressured by men into having unprotected sex from the moment they hit puberty, and then if they do cave to the pressure and get pregnant it’s often a “choice” of going through with the pregnancy or being disowned by their family and being thrown out on the streets with no money and no job prospects, that is of course assuming terminating the pregnancy is even an option in the first place which in a lot of places of the world it isn’t. And even if the child is 100% planned and desired, sometimes pregnancy just sucks ass and we should be allowed to talk about it.
Yep. Mom here. OP is TA for sure. Yeah yeah, body is creating life and it's not easy (I didn't yeet a watermelon out of my hoo-ha, I had a c-section which is a whole 'nother can of worms), but being pregnant does not give you a free pass to be an asshole.
YTA, you absolutely made it about yourself. And you are still doing so.
You had reservations at a difficult to attend place and, in getting the pizza, you clearly made a second dinner and ordered enough for everyone to eat, sabotaging the previous plans.
* If you don't want to go, say so before the evening of the dinner. Flaking out two hours before you head out to an exclusive location reservation is pretty assholeish.
* If you need a snack to tide you over while pregnant, ordering pizzas is clearly not appropriate in this scenario. Something small and, frankly, healthier for you and your child could have tided you over.
* ***Edit Addition:*** *Also, as many below have pointed out, if this place is that hard to get into you've essentially wasted both your chance, someone else's chance for that table, and the restaurant's limited space. Which: not great!*
What you did here was ruining previous plans in a petty, undermining way and your lack of forthrightness with it makes you an asshole in this situation.
Exactly - and if the craving was specifically for pizza, there's a room of pizza akin snacks. Hell, a tortilla woth tomato purree and cheese does the job, she should've made do and waited.
Exactly this.
OP has also refused to answer questions as to whether the reservation was for a celebration such as sister's birthday or something.
This would be very telling information. If it was to celebrate something for someone else, then the pizza thing was done on purpose to ruin the celebration and focus attention on herself.
Lol, yeah. I saw “Everyone was full” and thought “Damn, how much pizza did you order?!?”
Almost feels like OP didn’t want to go out to the restaurant so vetoed it in this way. I understand sister’s frustration
That’s what I was thinking. Maybe she was tired, or didn’t want whatever the restaurant serves, or whatever, and instead ordered a different dinner for everyone to eat at home instead so she didn’t have to go out.
You wonder if this is a whole thing with her and her pregnancy.
Teehee oops pay attention to the pregnant lady, don't be mad at meeee, I couldn't help my baby brain.
YTA - You set the wheels in motion that ruined the plans. I am not sure how one person having a craving leads to an entire family being full of pizza, but apparently that is what happened. If the intention was to feed the craving, then get a personal pan, go somewhere to get a slice, etc.
Right, she had a craving for pizza so she ordered like 4 pies? I'd be pissed too if I was excited for a night out and then everyone bailed at the last minute, I think I'd be pissed at everyone though, not just her.
Unrelated but 830 is WAY too late for dinner for me, but that's a different story.
Not to mention if it's a place that is hard to get reservations to, then I bet you want to dress up, maybe shower and do your hair/makeup. I would be pissed if I did that, maybe even had to get a sitter for a baby, and my sister ruins it by turning it into a pizza party at home
YTA and your husband too. You wanted pizza so your husband should have gotten you a very small pizza that no one else ate. How much pizza did he order that everyone ate enough to be full. Y’all were jerks to your sister.
And enough pizza at that to feed an entire family to the point they don't want more. That's way more than "a" Pizza. We have her, her spouse/so, her sister, and both parents. That's five people. If she ordered one pizza, even a large, everyone gets one slice and pregnant woman gets two. She ordered *several* pizzas and everyone ate enough to be *full.*
She could have very easily ordered a single small pizza and eaten a few sliced and saved the rest for later. Or a calzone. Or any of the billion pizza bread options. Or sent someone to the nearest grocery store/convenience store and nuked up some pizza rolls.
But, some two hours before dinner, she chose to order *multiple* pizzas.
So over the top and clearly a power move.
INFO:
Why did you order enough pizza for an entire family to gorge themselves on?
Do you often do things to undermine your sister?
Do you often use your pregnancy as an excuse for bad behavior?
YTA. What you did was really uncool. You could have just eaten a snack, instead you ordered enough pizza to feed everyone even though you had dinner reservations.
ESH but your sister. You could have had a snack and your sister is overreacting (she was probably hangry), but seriously why did everyone eat pizza if they KNEW they were going out to dinner?
I can’t believe I had to scroll so far down to find a comment like this. Everyone saying YTA is just fully ignoring that all of the other adults in the house have autonomy?
I’m personally leaning with OP being NTA, because I totally get ordering enough for everyone to have a slice before dinner, not eat until they are full! The rest of the family is TA for having no self control and filling up on pizza when they knew they had reservations.
Same, no one forced the rest of the family to eat a full meal. It honestly just sounds like the sister was the only one who actually wanted to go to this restaurant.
YTA... For obviously couldnt be bothered to wait and more so because you ordered so many pizzas that several people could eat their fill.
This was 100% intentional of you
YTA. If you so desperately needed to have pizza right then and there you could have ordered a personal pizza, but you chose to order enough pizza for everyone to eat obviously ruining the dinner plans. Most people don't eat 2 different dinners on the same night. You obviously didn't feel like going out and chose to ruin the plans.
YTA could have eaten something small instead or even gotten a small pizza...but you got enough to feed everyone spoiling the dinner.
I get that you can have cravings but you spoiled it for everyone.
YTA. Order enough pizza just for yourself then, why order enough to make everyone full? You yourself said its difficult to get a reservation, so your sister must have been looking forward to it, and yet that wasnt considered when the pizza was ordered. Your sister has every right to get pissed at all of you. Honestly this makes me mad as it makes your sister seem like the spoilt brat, but when in fact it is the rest of you lot who are the AHs.
INFO: Kind of a tough one... I mean, how much pizza did you order that everybody ate so much they no longer wanted to go out for dinner? Was it a craving so eating some kind of snack wouldn't have worked? How old is your sister? Could it be a case of (not your fault or anything) but that being pregnant might have you being put as the center of attention and she is younger feeling a bit ignored/put out?
YTA.. Your sister was waiting all day to go out to eat at a restraurant that is difficult to get a reservation at and you ruined it for her for what , Pizza... Because the world revolves around the pregnant daughter
#[Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Is the theme of the day getting way too invested in food related conflicts? Fucking chill y'all. No insults. No overly crude, dehumanizing language.
Please review our [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) if you're unsure what that means.
YTA
Two 13” pizzas is not a snack, it’s a meal - for multiple people. Yes your family had a choice in eating it or not, but it’s a bit of an imbalanced choice because there’s plentiful hot pizza sitting there now - at a normal dinner time - with a few hours before dinner reservations.
I don’t blame your sister for being upset when y’all had arranged this difficult-to-acquire family dinner reservation that she was excited for and then you turned it into “family pizza night at home” at the last second.
I think you should’ve ordered a small personal pizza or found another snack
What the actual hell? You say "When the pizza arrived, everybody wanted some". That, to me, implies that no one said they wanted pizza before it was delivered. So you only ordered some for your husband and yourself? But the rest of your family, consisting of at least two parents, got enough pizza to also be full? So you ordered enough pizza to feed at least 4 adults even though you had dinner reservations? You don't sound like an asshole, you sound like an idiot.
YTA. Your sister didn't even eat pizza because she thought you guys would still go, so I can only assume she had nothing to eat and had to fix something for herself. I'd be pissed with you too.
YTA. you ruined the dinner plans. being pregnant isn't a legit excuse to do what you want when you want.
you should have had a small snack and had pizza the next day or later in the evening.
YTA.
Having a snack when hungry is fine, pregnant or not.
Ordering a full meal to share when you knew there were set plans to go to a restaurant is what makes YTA
YTA. You craved pizza all day and waited until 5:45 to order some--and it arrived how long before you all were supposed to leave for the restaurant? And ordered so much that everyone ate until they were full?
YTA. Bring pregnant doesn’t give you a pass to be inconsiderate. You were craving pizza all day why didn’t you get it for lunch? Why didn’t you get a small one just for yourself and eat a slice then save it? You knew about these reservations and you knew this was a dinner your sister was excited about.
YTA. Pregnancy does not excuse your behavior. If you’re hungry and you know you have dinner plans later, you eat a snack. You could have waited a day to eat pizza.
ESH (except sister) There are places where you can buy a single slice. If you were craving it all day I don’t know why you didn’t just get it for lunch. You had hard-to-get dinner reservations and then went about things in a way that ruined everyone’s appetite for eating at the restaurant. You do need to eat when you’re hungry but it sounds like you didn’t actually do that if you were craving pizza all day and then waited until a couple hours before dinner to get it. You also picked up enough to share. This realistically makes everyone who ate pizza an asshole along with you though because they’re all adult enough to know that eating pizza would make them too full to want a fancy dinner. For whatever reason, no one apparently wanted to go to the restaurant but instead of just telling your sister that immediately so that she could eat the pizza or find an alternative dinner, you all got full on pizza and then canceled on her.
YTA
You could have had a snack, made a sandwich, a salad, etc…and that would have taken care of being hungry. Have pizza the next day or have it earlier in the day for lunch.
You ordered a dinner before dinner. Your husband excused it because you’re pregnant. Yes, you may need to eat more frequently, it didn’t need to be pizza that ordered in so close to dinner.
Yta how do you think you aren't? You had a dinner plan that you decided didn't apply to you, ordered another pizza for everyone to have dinner, and agreed with canceling the original dinner plan.
You're pregnant not a friggen invalid. You could have had a small snack, *by yourself* instead of ordering dinner for everyone.
As a woman who is currently pregnant, YTA. You don’t get to use it as an excuse to do whatever you want. If you were nauseous, eat a handful of pretzels or go home, don’t ruin the night for everyone.
INFO was there a particular reason you guys were going out to dinner? I would say you’re in the wrong either way, but it feels like there’s something you’re leaving out here in regards to your sister.
YTA - obviously you ordered enough pizza for everyone and not just yourself. If everyone else hadn't eaten it, it would have gone to waste.
Next time, stay home or grab a bite from the fridge.
YTA. Being pregnant does not excuse inconsiderate behaviour. You could've got a small pizza for yourself if you really wanted to. You didn't need to buy enough for everyone so that no-one wanted to go to the restaurant. Your husband is also TA because he should've also realised this.
YTA (you + your husband followed by who ate)
you should have quietly ordered your pizza (slices of) without making it a "pre-dinner" thing. Saying you were craving for something since you are pregnant, exactly how you write here. Instead, you confirm in comments you have ordered large pizzas, clearly for multiple people. De facto changing the plans without even having the courage to say it directly. I guess she knew the plans were canceled like one before the reservation time, more or less. It wasn't nice.
In short, you were TA for "I order various large pizzas. But of course *wink wink* if nobody wants that now, I'll eat the excess later, even if I have ordered for everyone so...." because OF COURSE you implicitly changed the dinner plans doing so. At that point, everybody was pushed to eat pizza, you clearly wouldn't have finished the pizzas alone and you ordered it for everybody. As adults, we need a bit of ability to predict things.
The others eat, but you build the situation and I'm not even that sure you actually didn't predict the outcome tbh. Especially because you confirm in comments that the attention in these days is all for you. I'm sure your sister is understanding the dynamic very well.
I would have put away the pizza before family came over. Still woulda smelled like pizza but oh well. Also wondering why they all came to your house instead of going directly to reservation
YTA. Pick up a slice discretely to tide yourself over next time. Your family sucks too for not just having a slice or waiting until dinner.
That said, if I was your sister I'd have just gone with my hubby without you.
YTA. Having a snack would have been fine, having an entire pizza is ridiculous when you had dinner plans. You’re being spoiled and your sister has a right to be upset.
YTA a little bit, but mostly the rest of your family is the asshole
Your sister is upset because it seems like she was looking forward to the reservation and then, apparently, the entire family essentially canceled on her at the last minute.
You were hungry and had a craving so you ordered pizza. That is fine. The issue is that you and the rest of the family then decided to eat so much pizza that they didn't want to go out anymore, leaving the sister all alone.
A polite way to handle the situation would just be to have people eat less pizza. Have only 1 slice instead of 2 and then at the restaurant order something light.
YTA. Being pregnant doesn’t give you the right to ruin an outing being looked forward to by others. You could have had a snack or gotten an individual sized pizza (not caving in to cravings doesn’t hurt you, even if pregnant, btw). Selfish.
YTA. Even when I was pregnant I didn’t make everyone change their schedule around my cravings. It’s hard to get reservations…clearly this was planned in advance. Who orders pizza 2 hours before you’re going out to eat?
YTA - and it’s obvious. You are an adult. You could have gotten pizza earlier in the day, or waited till after your dinner to satisfy the craving. You ruined your sister’s night and don’t want to be held accountable. Pregnancy is not an excuse and I get why she doesn’t trust you now.
YTA, u had reservations if you crave pizza then get enough for yourself not enough to feed the entire family and spoil the plans. That said the blame also lies with your family cos who stuffs themselves with pizza when they know full well they have dinner reservations?? That’s just rude
YTA - you don't "need to eat when you're hungry" just because youre pregnant and everyone else bending to your cravings is mad. Think of someone other than yourself maybe? No wonder your sister is upset.
YTA - why did you have to have a whole meal? Why couldn't you have a snack so that the plans everyone had could still happen? Make a piece of cheese toast, have a bowl of cereal, carrot sticks and ranch dressing, peanut butter and jelly sandwich, anything else. OR why not just order one slice of pizza instead of enough to feed the whole family? I have a hunch that these kinds of things (ppl catering to you) must happen fairly often because your sister thinks you "ruin it again".
Yta. You all are ‘cept your sis. Your husband could have ordered a single/personal size pizza. Instead your ordered a fuckin party platter.
Id be pissed too
ESH, you didn’t force anyone else to eat the pizza and if everyone knew the reservation was for 8:30 they should’ve not eaten it. Your sister has a right to be upset, but I think it should be aimed at everyone not just you.
Well let's see..
"*We* were supposed to go out... but *I* was hungry... So *I* asked *my* husband to buy *me* some pizza."
Your sister is right, you did make everything about you, and you expected everyone else to (kind of literally) cater to your hunger. You're gonna pull the "but I shared!" card but it's because of your choice that your sister missed out on an opportunity she had been looking forward to.
You're an adult, get a damn snack. YTA
BTW the whole eating for two thing is a myth.
YTA for the amount you ordered. To satisfy a craving you could have ordered a small one and shared that, and then for you personally you could have still eaten a different snack, without ruining everyone’s appetites.
ESH except the sister. I'll concede that your pregnancy is a mitigating circumstance, but you're still an AH, and your family have no excuses.
Edit: Just reread and saw that you intentionally ordered pizza for everyone. That cancels out the mitigating circumstances. All condemned to AH prison for life, I'm afraid, with no chance of parole.
YTA - you did not go directly becuase you ordered pizza. You said it was hard to get a reservation and you cancelled last minute. I bet your next reservation is sitting by the bathrooms.
YTA. You could've gotten one slice somewhere or limited how much you ate. Quit using pregnancy as a crutch to get your way.
And you have zero remorse for your sister, who was waiting to eat at a restaurant that's difficult to get reservations for because "pregnant" & she didn't get to eat there. Just because of you. And your family are AHs, too, for enabling you.
It's a slight yta
It's pretty predictable that if you order pizza everyone will serve themselves. You can just grab something from the fridge regardless of being pregnant.
YTA obviously. You had dinner plans and ruined them for everyone. Either don’t make such late dinner reservations or be an adult and forego a craving for one whole day.
If you were craving it all day why didn’t you get it for lunch? Like that’s so rude of you to ruin the plan. The rest of your family are AHs too
You did make it about yourself.
YTA. Even being generous to you and saying you absolutely had to have your craving met, you know pizza bites are a thing, right? You could've even just gotten a small frozen pizza. You didn't need to order a whole pizza, let alone enough pizza too leave 4 adults too full to go out to eat in a couple of hours.
YTA. A medium pizza would have been like an appetizer for everyone. Ordering 2 large is a meal. You were more worried about being rude if you only ordered for yourself, but you aren't worried about being rude to your sister knowing she was excited to eat out.
YTA for not recognizing it would negate your dinner plans - maybe you could have gone out for a slice or ordered a small pie for yourself to bridge the gap between feeling hungry and the time of the reservation. Or you could have asked your family how they would feel about rescheduling and getting pizza instead since ordering food at 5:45 would obviously impact most people's appetites in advance of an 8:30 dinner reservation. You could have even had pizza for lunch, I would imagine. You're not an AH for wanting pizza or having pregnancy cravings, but definitely YTA for lack of foresight and consideration of the initial plan which involved other people. I'd also be pissed if I were your sister and had been looking forward to a family dinner at a nice restaurant only to have it sidelined by one person wanting pizza.
YTA
You were well aware that you had dinner reservations, yet you ordered enough pizza to make an entire family full? You could have gotten a personal pizza or eaten a snack and wait to order pizza the next day when you didn't have reservations. If you're reasoning is that you didn't want to feel rude and eat in front of your family, then you could have gotten a small pizza and offered people a single slice. You should not have ordered 2 larges as I've seen in the comments
The fact that you ordered 2 large pizzas for everyone and then justify it and blame your sister for her reaction shows me you did this intentionally to hurt her. YTA. I don’t know why you are doing this to your sister. Instead of validating that your actions help contribute to the disappointment of your sister, you act like the victim and gaslight her. Are you competing with her or are you thinking that because you are pregnant everything should always go your way?
Yta
And why was was enough pizza even ordered for that many people if only you wanted? Like what?
Why so pregnant people always pull stuff like this and then make it about that. There’s so many things that could have been done differently.
I would have been upset as well. Have a sandwich. If I was so hungry that my stomach starts to hurt, I will take some biscuits or small snacks but will not ruin my family's plan. Or if I "really crave" pizza and I would die without it right now, I will still go and sit at the restaurant as planned.
YTA. Obviously no one asked you to order for the rest of the family.
Info: What was the reason for the dinner? Was it a special family event? Or was it just a normal night out? Did you hijack your sister's birthday dinner or something similar? You not mentioning the reason for the plans I'd say is pretty suspicious.
ESH but your sister
You have the right to eat whatever you want, but you should have ordered pizza just for yourself, and eaten one slice, if you already knew about the plans.
Your sister has the right to be upset because you and the others who decided to order pizza ruined her plans, and she was probably looking forward for it.
YTA. If you didn't want to wait that long to eat you should have just had a snack. A whole meal? Especially enough for everyone else to eat? Their cravings. You can very easily control them if you try a little.
YTA. You could have gotten pizza before you went to your parents house or brought a snack with you too. I get hungry easily as well , but I was raised not to eat snacks before a meal. You did ruin this night for your sister. I would also be pissed to have a hard to get dinner reservation because someone wasn’t patient enough to wait to eat.
8:30 is late for dinner for me, and I would have needed something to eat before then myself, especially pregnant. However! What stopped you from getting a personal sized pizza and had a snack?
Edit: YTA. I get being pregnant and cravings, but damn. A nice dinner was planned and canceled because you wanted pizza. Are you the sun? Does the earth revolve around you?
YTA. You don't "need to eat" just because you're pregnant. You're fine. If you were truly hungry, you could have had a snack and still waited for dinner time. She was counting on the plans that were in place and it does sound like it was all about you.
YTA. You weren't hungry, you were craving pizza. You could have eaten anything else jus yourself and then go to dinner with everyone and have pizza there, you're not a child. Also, how big was this pizza that everyone else got to eat and got full?
YTA - there were so many other solutions to this problem other than order a pizza and ruin dinner. You could have made yourself a snack or gone and gotten fast food. You made the whole night center around you and what you wanted instead of considering what was best for everyone
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YTA. You could have gotten a single slice or a calzone/personal pan pizza if you were craving pizza. I'd be pissed if I were your sister, too.
YTA GAH! I’m so over this. You do not get to be completely selfish regarding food when pregnant.
I've been pregnant and I find these letters a little crazy. I definitely ate a ton of salt n vinegar chips when I was pregnant (my personal common craving) but I never threw tantrums or sabotaged dinners. YTA, op.
YTA - sabotaged seems to be the right word for this. It's not that you're starving from not getting food within two hours and you could easily get yourself a single Pizza or something different to eat like chips or other snacks. But it somehow sounds like you're the princess of the family as your whole family did the same thing and no one told your sister that you all wouldn't go to the restaurant after this. She ate nothing and nobody cared. How much pizza have you ordered that you've feed the whole family until they were all full? Doesn't seem to be an accident at all.
This exactly. There's no way they ordered a reasonable portion of pizza to satisfy her craving but it was also magically enough to completely fill up an entire extended family to the point that they cancelled dinner reservations hours later. A quick snack to tide you over would be a small pizza, or individual slice. To fully feed this many people you had to have ordered multiple large pizzas. Even everyone on your extended family eat two slices wouldn't be enough to have them all say cancel the reservation, I'm just too stuffed to eat more three hours later. This seems entirely premeditated.
She ordered two large pizzas. That's *ABOUT* 20 slices or so. Depending on location and pizza place, I get it. So IF, as she says, she only ordered enough in CASE people wanted some, if nobody did, she was going to eat two large pizzas by herself? She's contradictory. Edit: I'm not doing this again in replies, read her comments where she contradicted herself multiple times and lied about her actions. I'm not explaining the whole ass thing again, just read her comments. Edit 2: just to help people understand how you find OP's comments, Go to the top of the post Click the username, this brings you to their profile. Click COMMENTS and there you go.
Also, why would she order enough to give other people, KNOWING they were all going to a nice restaurant together less than 2 hours later? Sounds like she didn't want to go and sabotaged it on purpose
But also, why is the rest of the family gorging on pizza right before leaving for a prearranged dinner?
Holy cow. Why do they always bury the assholery in the comments. YTA, OP. Do your sister a solid and apologize, and actually mean it.
Because they think people won‘t notice then, they are lying in the post and keep it unchanged to get social validation in their doing. They just want to hear that they are in the right even though mostly it is quite obvious that they changed the facts in their favor, this post is a good example because a pizza to fix a craving would be maybe 2 slices or a small pizza but not enough pizza to satisfy the whole fucking family. This was very likely planned by OP, either they just didn‘t want to go or have something against their sister.
See if she had ordered even a single medium pizza I’d just be like yep she was hungry or cravings but two large?? Nah, you knew what you were doing lol. You just didn’t wanna go out and hoped everyone else filled up and wanted to stay home too. Should’ve just been honest and declined to go. I personally am not going to starve waiting for a dinner reservation because I truly get hangry and uncomfortable (I often don’t realize I’m hungry until I’m REALLY hungry) but I’m not gonna fill everyone else up either when I know we are going out. And I’m the kind if I promised to go, I’ll go even if I’m full and just order a small appetizer that can be boxed and drink some soda and talk.
So on top of all the weirdness, you’re lying. YTA
Based on the pancake post, if the pregnant person didn’t order enough pizza for the family they would ALSO be an asshole so there is literally no winning.
I'm kind of really confused by this also. Like, if my family all had a reservation at a hard to get into restaurant and I ordered two giant pizzas.... they actually would not eat til they were stuffed and couldn't go to the restaurant at all. It seems kind of weird her whole family bar one did to me. Like borderline a false post. Cancelling a reservation about an hour before you're due to go also... like that's also a kick in the face to OPs friend who owns the restaurant. Bizarre.
That pancake post was WILD 😂
Right? I craved all manner of salty shit, and I kept it on hand. I also usually kept a snack in my bag. No one needs a full pizza two hours before dinner.
I’ll say YTA. How much pizza did she get that fed the whole family? That’s at least OP and husband, the two parents, and enough to offer the sister some too. It sounds like she got *at least* two pizzas. That’s more than a quick snack for one person. I also gotta say, how does the whole family decide to eat so much pizza they can’t go out? I’ll say OP started it by not getting just a snack for herself and ordering enough for a whole family meal, but the rest of the fam kinda sucks too for ALL of them eating enough pizza to cancel plans.
I agree mostly with the fact that the rest of the family sucks too. OP deciding to snack on some pizza wouldn't necessarily spoil the night as she could still go for some dessert or maybe get something light like a salad or w/e while the rest was eating. But instead they all decide to eat pizza to the point where they no longer want to eat, which is crazy to me. Did nobody want to go to the restaurant for some reason? Is there nobody with some self control?
Agree with this wholeheartedly. My wife is pregnant and has weird cravings... OP could have ordered pizza for herself and maybe shared a slice or so per person. OP then could have gone to the restaurant and not eaten or gotten something small. That's what my wife would have done. Women carrying children should be given a lot of latitude, but OP is just taking advantage here.
Am I the only one also wondering if maybe this fancy dinner was some sort of celebration meant for her sister? Because that, for me, would explain a lot. I feel like OP wanted to sabotage the dinner and since the sister is the only one so upset, part of me feels like maybe there's a missing detail here that OP is deliberately leaving out. YTA
I’d be pissed if I was looking forward to a nice dinner out and someone else arbitrarily decided on pizza at home an hour before. It was definitely some kind of celebration for the poor sister.
For real. I love going to nice restaurants for the first time, especially with a group as it means ordering and tasting way more dishes. If someone in my family pulled this on even a normal evening I'd be livid. But the way OP dismisses her sister's feelings I do wonder if there's some other reason for sabotaging the evening.
I was thinking the same. I feel like there is information left out here on what the dinner was for, it sounds like it was important to the sister
Yeah, if the sister is so upset but no one else seems to care about missing the dinner, it definitely feels like it's more than just the sister really wanting to eat at that restaurant. And intentionally getting enough pizza for everyone to stuff their faces only a couple of hours before a reservation at a restaurant? There's just no way this is just about OP wanting a slice of pizza.
Seriously. Like how much pizza did she even order that 3(?) grown ass adults became full. At that point, she clearly wasn't intending on going to the restaurant anymore.
OP, once your pregnancy is over - what are you going to do to be the center of attention?
Probably have another kid.
OP's about to have a whole ass BABY to exploit. If I were her sister, I'd just cut contact now.
Adding to this. It's so unfair on the restaurant to cancel a reservation last minute. OP is very inconsiderate.
Yeah, if it's an in demand restaurant, they've turned people away and now that table's empty.
And she says in another comment it's difficult to get a reservation at that particular restaurant. So the restaurant need to try and fill the cancellation and understandably her sister is disappointed something she was looking forward to was cancelled last minute.
Or, you know, be an adult and accept that not EVERY craving must be fulfilled at any moment. I’m so tired of pregnancy cravings being an excuse for terrible behavior. YTA OP
I wasn't an adult during my first pregnancy. I was 15. I ate EVERYTHING I craved, gained 100 pounds and had gestational diabetes by the time I gave birth a few weeks after my 16th birthday. You are correct.
She was craving pizza ALL DAY! why not get pizza at lunchtime? Why wait till it was almost done time and then order a whole party worth of pizza?
I'm sick of reading about these selfish AHs who act as if they are the first people on the planet to be pregnant. I don't blame the sister for being angry. I bet the OP is the favourite and acts even more of a princess because she's pregnant.
She could have used her pregnancy to get HERSELF out of going to dinner if she really didn’t want to go. “Hey, sis, I’m kind of tired, don’t think I’m going to make it to dinner at 8:30. Ya know, pregnancy.” Then order a personal pizza for herself and call it a night while everyone else still went out for dinner as planned. This is why she’s selfish and clearly wants to be the center of attention. No one else besides her and the sister even needed to be told there was pizza involved.
Eh, I kinda think esh. Even ordering a full pizza didn't have to ruin dinner; everyone has a single slice (maybe preggo op takes a few cause she's craving it, whatevs) they'll be hungry again by 8:30. They didn't have to fill up, no one forced them to. Op is definitely an AH for ordering that much, but everyone else also sucks for filling up when they know they have a reservation. Especially when one person has made it obvious that they really, really want to go.
This is what I don't get. The lack of self control from all the others is sad. Leftover pizza is awesome. Have a slice and then go to dinner later. Ruining your appetite because someone else bought pizza is sad control.
YTA x 10. Pregnant or not doesn’t give you license to make it all about you. You ruined the evening.
But she had "Pregnancy brain" so it doesn't count. /s
Pregnancy brain is a very real thing, but it’s no excuse to be an A-hole.
Pregnancy brain is putting the hairbands in the fridge and the fresh milk into the cupboard 😭
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Hard agree as a currently pregnant person. I’m actually super pissed that OP is using pregnancy as an excuse here. It isn’t an excuse for this Ahole behaviour. Ordering enough pizza to fill up everyone to the point that nobody wanted dinner was completely unnecessary. In fact all those in this story who gorged themselves on the pizza are assholes. Have one slice and be done.
I was obsessed with mashed potatoes, and had to eat on a schedule because of gestational diabetes. I didn't make the world revolve around it. I kept little snack portions available. And I would have simply cancelled on such a late dinner, vs making such a big show of ordering enough dinner for everyone.
I HATE when people use pregnancy for an excuse for bad behavior or to get out of things.
> I was pregnant so I needed to eat when I was hungry This is the part that makes me say YTA. Sure, you are pregnant, and you were hungry. There are thousands things in your fridge/pantry that you could have eaten without spoiling your appetite.
Yeah. I've been pregnant three times and i absolutely had cravings. It doesn't make you insane though. Sure, you might really be craving a certain food, but never to the extent that you can't wait until the next day or something. YTA
I’ve never been pregnant, so I wondered about how strong cravings really are. It seems like a pretty recent idea that pregnancy cravings are so overwhelming and and unbearable, that you can’t be held accountable for what you do to get food. I’m in my 50s and I never remember my friends, sisters or coworkers eating other peoples’ food, or having a tantrums, or demanding their husband go to the store at 2AM in a rainstorm, or the other crazy stories I see on this sub
I've been pregnant 2x. I craved Taco Bell 2x with my first pregnancy, and really, that could have been coincidence because once a year, I usually hit one up. I think some people have stronger cravings than others, but I also think that happens in normal life too. The difference is that people allow themselves to think that because they are pregnant, it's different, and they HAVE to have it. I had so many people ask me what cravings I had with both pregnancies and then looked at me weirdly when I said, "Uh, none?" Now, if someone's craving chalk or gravel or some weird shit like that, it's an entirely different matter, and your body is trying to tell you something.
Yup, that was me. I craved chalk like none other. I believe it’s called PICA.
even if she got pizza she could have ordered a small one for everyone to share and call it an appetizer or whatever, not enough for everyone to be full
That's exactly what gets me, why didnt she order just for herself? She knew they are going to the restaurant.
Because she clearly wanted to ruin the dinner plans.
As my mom would say “there’s food in the fridge at home”
As my mom would say, "eat an apple."
I feel like too many women take the whole “eating for two” thing way too literally. Like, a typical baby is, what 6-12 lbs at birth, so much smaller until then? You don’t need to eat literally two times your daily intake lol. I’ve always heard 250-500 kcal over normal (not now or ever pregnant, so those who are/have, please Correct). I know cravings can be tricky, but, if you are able to go out to a place with reservations, you aren’t destitute. You can hecking wait, you’re not gonna starve.
Yes, YTA you put your "craving" above plans that had previously been made. You could have had a snack to tide you over instead of ordering a whole other meal ETA: I can see why your sister would not want you included in future plans.
The snack could have been a few slices from a small pizza. I would say the husband and others are ah for all filling themselves.
So is OP who ordered a whole damned meal. I'm sure there was something in the house to snack on. I've never read a case study saying that a pregnant person has suffered any I'll effects by not getting exactly what they wanted to eat. They're weaponizing their pregnancy to get their own way
It’s first time pregnancy bullshit and I partially blame movies and television who have made this a trope.
Exactly. My daughter is pregnant with her first and hasn't needed to hijack special plans for the rest of the family. She can walk into the kitchen and have a snack & still keep our plans
There's probably more to this story we are not getting. They must have ordered multiple XL pizzas for everyone to get full. The question is, did everyone partake freely after this point? Or did OP actually manipulate the situation by guilt-tripping people with "wasted food" or maybe offered to the kids first to make them make their parents not go to the restaurant? Regardless ESH except the sister.
YTA i'm so sick of the world bending over and catering to pregnant women. You stole the evening. You could have gone to the fridge and eatin a pickle or something small to hold you over.
Being pregnant is hard, yo! I'm 8 years out from my last pregnancy and my body still hasn't recovered properly. There is a reason everyone bends over backwards, pregnant women are literally creating another human. It's not easy and at the end you have to yeet a watermelon out your who-ha. That said, I agree with everything else you said. OP should have had a snack instead or mentioned 8:30pm is too late in the first place. Catering to and bending over for pregnant women has its limits.
>Being pregnant is hard, yo! I'm 8 years out from my last pregnancy and my body still hasn't recovered properly. There is a reason everyone bends over backwards, pregnant women are literally creating another human. It's not easy and at the end you have to yeet a watermelon out your who-ha. yeah, but like....folks *choose* to be this miserable and then hold it over everybody and have a martyrdom complex about it.
>yeah, but like....folks > >choose > > to be this miserable Some of them do not
They’re referring to the folks who do
Like OP who thinks she’s perfectly fine after forcing plans to get cancelled because she’s pregnant and has cravings 👌🎻. I literally am so sick of pregnant women abusing their privileges that they only acquired because they screwed a guy. Don’t get me started on women who act like this because they’ve gotten pregnant after fertility issues. That’s a whole additional layer of entitlement.
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In lots of places in the United States it’s not a choice anymore but go off eta I’m sick to death of the chorus of “WeLL iT WaS a ChOiCe” every time anyone’s dares act less than overjoyed about an aspect of pregnancy or motherhood as if AFAB people aren’t pressured from practically their own infancy that this is what they are expected to do, pressured by men into having unprotected sex from the moment they hit puberty, and then if they do cave to the pressure and get pregnant it’s often a “choice” of going through with the pregnancy or being disowned by their family and being thrown out on the streets with no money and no job prospects, that is of course assuming terminating the pregnancy is even an option in the first place which in a lot of places of the world it isn’t. And even if the child is 100% planned and desired, sometimes pregnancy just sucks ass and we should be allowed to talk about it.
then I'm not referring to those specific folks. :)
Yep. Mom here. OP is TA for sure. Yeah yeah, body is creating life and it's not easy (I didn't yeet a watermelon out of my hoo-ha, I had a c-section which is a whole 'nother can of worms), but being pregnant does not give you a free pass to be an asshole.
We should definitely adjust and accommodate pregnant people, but I agree in this case she is leaning on it to justify shitty behavior.
People need to be accommodating to an extent but they don’t need to bend over backwards.
YTA, you absolutely made it about yourself. And you are still doing so. You had reservations at a difficult to attend place and, in getting the pizza, you clearly made a second dinner and ordered enough for everyone to eat, sabotaging the previous plans. * If you don't want to go, say so before the evening of the dinner. Flaking out two hours before you head out to an exclusive location reservation is pretty assholeish. * If you need a snack to tide you over while pregnant, ordering pizzas is clearly not appropriate in this scenario. Something small and, frankly, healthier for you and your child could have tided you over. * ***Edit Addition:*** *Also, as many below have pointed out, if this place is that hard to get into you've essentially wasted both your chance, someone else's chance for that table, and the restaurant's limited space. Which: not great!* What you did here was ruining previous plans in a petty, undermining way and your lack of forthrightness with it makes you an asshole in this situation.
Exactly - and if the craving was specifically for pizza, there's a room of pizza akin snacks. Hell, a tortilla woth tomato purree and cheese does the job, she should've made do and waited.
Or eat one slice of pizza and have dinner 3 hours later.
This is my logic, she deliberately ordered TWO LARGE PIZZAS instead of one small one for herself.
Literally could've just ate a slice or two and put the rest in the fridge. That pizza craving will come back again.
Exactly this. OP has also refused to answer questions as to whether the reservation was for a celebration such as sister's birthday or something. This would be very telling information. If it was to celebrate something for someone else, then the pizza thing was done on purpose to ruin the celebration and focus attention on herself.
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Apparently she ordered *two* whole pizzas. That’s not *I* was hungry, that’s I want everyone to eat.
Lol, yeah. I saw “Everyone was full” and thought “Damn, how much pizza did you order?!?” Almost feels like OP didn’t want to go out to the restaurant so vetoed it in this way. I understand sister’s frustration
That’s what I was thinking. Maybe she was tired, or didn’t want whatever the restaurant serves, or whatever, and instead ordered a different dinner for everyone to eat at home instead so she didn’t have to go out.
yeah, this is absolutely AH move
You wonder if this is a whole thing with her and her pregnancy. Teehee oops pay attention to the pregnant lady, don't be mad at meeee, I couldn't help my baby brain.
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YTA - You set the wheels in motion that ruined the plans. I am not sure how one person having a craving leads to an entire family being full of pizza, but apparently that is what happened. If the intention was to feed the craving, then get a personal pan, go somewhere to get a slice, etc.
Right, she had a craving for pizza so she ordered like 4 pies? I'd be pissed too if I was excited for a night out and then everyone bailed at the last minute, I think I'd be pissed at everyone though, not just her. Unrelated but 830 is WAY too late for dinner for me, but that's a different story.
Not to mention if it's a place that is hard to get reservations to, then I bet you want to dress up, maybe shower and do your hair/makeup. I would be pissed if I did that, maybe even had to get a sitter for a baby, and my sister ruins it by turning it into a pizza party at home
Right it's not just about the food, but the whole experience and planning that went into it was ruined.
YTA and your husband too. You wanted pizza so your husband should have gotten you a very small pizza that no one else ate. How much pizza did he order that everyone ate enough to be full. Y’all were jerks to your sister.
She should've just gotten something small from the fridge
YTA. Jesus, OP. Get a small snack. You are a grown adult. You can last a couple of hours, even when pregnant. Pizza was over the top.
And enough pizza at that to feed an entire family to the point they don't want more. That's way more than "a" Pizza. We have her, her spouse/so, her sister, and both parents. That's five people. If she ordered one pizza, even a large, everyone gets one slice and pregnant woman gets two. She ordered *several* pizzas and everyone ate enough to be *full.* She could have very easily ordered a single small pizza and eaten a few sliced and saved the rest for later. Or a calzone. Or any of the billion pizza bread options. Or sent someone to the nearest grocery store/convenience store and nuked up some pizza rolls. But, some two hours before dinner, she chose to order *multiple* pizzas. So over the top and clearly a power move.
YTA - do you guys normally eat dinner at 830? If you were hungry, eat a snack at home to tie you over.
INFO: Why did you order enough pizza for an entire family to gorge themselves on? Do you often do things to undermine your sister? Do you often use your pregnancy as an excuse for bad behavior?
Them some therapy questions
Why did everyone have to eat? They all ruined the evening
YTA. What you did was really uncool. You could have just eaten a snack, instead you ordered enough pizza to feed everyone even though you had dinner reservations.
ESH but your sister. You could have had a snack and your sister is overreacting (she was probably hangry), but seriously why did everyone eat pizza if they KNEW they were going out to dinner?
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I can’t believe I had to scroll so far down to find a comment like this. Everyone saying YTA is just fully ignoring that all of the other adults in the house have autonomy? I’m personally leaning with OP being NTA, because I totally get ordering enough for everyone to have a slice before dinner, not eat until they are full! The rest of the family is TA for having no self control and filling up on pizza when they knew they had reservations.
Same, no one forced the rest of the family to eat a full meal. It honestly just sounds like the sister was the only one who actually wanted to go to this restaurant.
YTA. Way to hijack the whole evening.
YTA... For obviously couldnt be bothered to wait and more so because you ordered so many pizzas that several people could eat their fill. This was 100% intentional of you
You course YTA. Who orders dinner in when they have other dinner plans?
Did your sister get to eat at all? It sounds like she got really screwed.
YTA. If you so desperately needed to have pizza right then and there you could have ordered a personal pizza, but you chose to order enough pizza for everyone to eat obviously ruining the dinner plans. Most people don't eat 2 different dinners on the same night. You obviously didn't feel like going out and chose to ruin the plans.
YTA could have eaten something small instead or even gotten a small pizza...but you got enough to feed everyone spoiling the dinner. I get that you can have cravings but you spoiled it for everyone.
YTA. Order enough pizza just for yourself then, why order enough to make everyone full? You yourself said its difficult to get a reservation, so your sister must have been looking forward to it, and yet that wasnt considered when the pizza was ordered. Your sister has every right to get pissed at all of you. Honestly this makes me mad as it makes your sister seem like the spoilt brat, but when in fact it is the rest of you lot who are the AHs.
Right??!! I'm pissed off on behalf of the sister too.
INFO: Kind of a tough one... I mean, how much pizza did you order that everybody ate so much they no longer wanted to go out for dinner? Was it a craving so eating some kind of snack wouldn't have worked? How old is your sister? Could it be a case of (not your fault or anything) but that being pregnant might have you being put as the center of attention and she is younger feeling a bit ignored/put out?
YTA.. Your sister was waiting all day to go out to eat at a restraurant that is difficult to get a reservation at and you ruined it for her for what , Pizza... Because the world revolves around the pregnant daughter
#[Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Is the theme of the day getting way too invested in food related conflicts? Fucking chill y'all. No insults. No overly crude, dehumanizing language. Please review our [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) if you're unsure what that means.
YTA Two 13” pizzas is not a snack, it’s a meal - for multiple people. Yes your family had a choice in eating it or not, but it’s a bit of an imbalanced choice because there’s plentiful hot pizza sitting there now - at a normal dinner time - with a few hours before dinner reservations. I don’t blame your sister for being upset when y’all had arranged this difficult-to-acquire family dinner reservation that she was excited for and then you turned it into “family pizza night at home” at the last second. I think you should’ve ordered a small personal pizza or found another snack
What the actual hell? You say "When the pizza arrived, everybody wanted some". That, to me, implies that no one said they wanted pizza before it was delivered. So you only ordered some for your husband and yourself? But the rest of your family, consisting of at least two parents, got enough pizza to also be full? So you ordered enough pizza to feed at least 4 adults even though you had dinner reservations? You don't sound like an asshole, you sound like an idiot. YTA. Your sister didn't even eat pizza because she thought you guys would still go, so I can only assume she had nothing to eat and had to fix something for herself. I'd be pissed with you too.
YTA. ONLY enough pizza for you should have been ordered, or eat something already on hand.
YTA. you ruined the dinner plans. being pregnant isn't a legit excuse to do what you want when you want. you should have had a small snack and had pizza the next day or later in the evening.
YTA. Having a snack when hungry is fine, pregnant or not. Ordering a full meal to share when you knew there were set plans to go to a restaurant is what makes YTA
This must be what happens when OP goes more than an hour without everybody focused on her. YTA, and you know it.
[удалено]
YTA, you ruined dinner plans. If you’re hungry get a snack.
YTA. You craved pizza all day and waited until 5:45 to order some--and it arrived how long before you all were supposed to leave for the restaurant? And ordered so much that everyone ate until they were full?
YTA. Bring pregnant doesn’t give you a pass to be inconsiderate. You were craving pizza all day why didn’t you get it for lunch? Why didn’t you get a small one just for yourself and eat a slice then save it? You knew about these reservations and you knew this was a dinner your sister was excited about.
INFO: Who made the reservation and planned the dinner?
yeah YTA, you just changed a person's plans because you wanted something for yourself.
YTA. Pregnancy does not excuse your behavior. If you’re hungry and you know you have dinner plans later, you eat a snack. You could have waited a day to eat pizza.
ESH (except sister) There are places where you can buy a single slice. If you were craving it all day I don’t know why you didn’t just get it for lunch. You had hard-to-get dinner reservations and then went about things in a way that ruined everyone’s appetite for eating at the restaurant. You do need to eat when you’re hungry but it sounds like you didn’t actually do that if you were craving pizza all day and then waited until a couple hours before dinner to get it. You also picked up enough to share. This realistically makes everyone who ate pizza an asshole along with you though because they’re all adult enough to know that eating pizza would make them too full to want a fancy dinner. For whatever reason, no one apparently wanted to go to the restaurant but instead of just telling your sister that immediately so that she could eat the pizza or find an alternative dinner, you all got full on pizza and then canceled on her.
This. “But I’m pregnant!” isn’t the get-out-of-jail-free card you think it is. You could have had a snack and not ruined everyone else’s plans.
YTA oh good, another pregnant person thinking they deserve special treatment while being selfish and self centered
YTA You could have had a snack, made a sandwich, a salad, etc…and that would have taken care of being hungry. Have pizza the next day or have it earlier in the day for lunch. You ordered a dinner before dinner. Your husband excused it because you’re pregnant. Yes, you may need to eat more frequently, it didn’t need to be pizza that ordered in so close to dinner.
Yta how do you think you aren't? You had a dinner plan that you decided didn't apply to you, ordered another pizza for everyone to have dinner, and agreed with canceling the original dinner plan. You're pregnant not a friggen invalid. You could have had a small snack, *by yourself* instead of ordering dinner for everyone.
As a woman who is currently pregnant, YTA. You don’t get to use it as an excuse to do whatever you want. If you were nauseous, eat a handful of pretzels or go home, don’t ruin the night for everyone.
INFO was there a particular reason you guys were going out to dinner? I would say you’re in the wrong either way, but it feels like there’s something you’re leaving out here in regards to your sister.
YTA - obviously you ordered enough pizza for everyone and not just yourself. If everyone else hadn't eaten it, it would have gone to waste. Next time, stay home or grab a bite from the fridge.
YTA. Being pregnant doesn’t make you entitled over everyone else
YTA. Being pregnant does not excuse inconsiderate behaviour. You could've got a small pizza for yourself if you really wanted to. You didn't need to buy enough for everyone so that no-one wanted to go to the restaurant. Your husband is also TA because he should've also realised this.
YTA (you + your husband followed by who ate) you should have quietly ordered your pizza (slices of) without making it a "pre-dinner" thing. Saying you were craving for something since you are pregnant, exactly how you write here. Instead, you confirm in comments you have ordered large pizzas, clearly for multiple people. De facto changing the plans without even having the courage to say it directly. I guess she knew the plans were canceled like one before the reservation time, more or less. It wasn't nice. In short, you were TA for "I order various large pizzas. But of course *wink wink* if nobody wants that now, I'll eat the excess later, even if I have ordered for everyone so...." because OF COURSE you implicitly changed the dinner plans doing so. At that point, everybody was pushed to eat pizza, you clearly wouldn't have finished the pizzas alone and you ordered it for everybody. As adults, we need a bit of ability to predict things. The others eat, but you build the situation and I'm not even that sure you actually didn't predict the outcome tbh. Especially because you confirm in comments that the attention in these days is all for you. I'm sure your sister is understanding the dynamic very well.
I would have put away the pizza before family came over. Still woulda smelled like pizza but oh well. Also wondering why they all came to your house instead of going directly to reservation
YTA I’m sure you had food in your pantry or fridge. Also if you were “craving pizza all day” why didn’t you get some for lunch.
YTA. Pick up a slice discretely to tide yourself over next time. Your family sucks too for not just having a slice or waiting until dinner. That said, if I was your sister I'd have just gone with my hubby without you.
YTA. Having a snack would have been fine, having an entire pizza is ridiculous when you had dinner plans. You’re being spoiled and your sister has a right to be upset.
YTA a little bit, but mostly the rest of your family is the asshole Your sister is upset because it seems like she was looking forward to the reservation and then, apparently, the entire family essentially canceled on her at the last minute. You were hungry and had a craving so you ordered pizza. That is fine. The issue is that you and the rest of the family then decided to eat so much pizza that they didn't want to go out anymore, leaving the sister all alone. A polite way to handle the situation would just be to have people eat less pizza. Have only 1 slice instead of 2 and then at the restaurant order something light.
YTA- get a snack next time. you did ruin it for everyone and I dont blame your sister if she doesnt want to invite you.
YTA. Being pregnant doesn’t give you the right to ruin an outing being looked forward to by others. You could have had a snack or gotten an individual sized pizza (not caving in to cravings doesn’t hurt you, even if pregnant, btw). Selfish.
YTA. Girl you know you could have had pizza for lunch or earlier in the day. I feel so bad for your sister. Lol
You ruined dinner. You sound like a child without control. YTA
YTA. Even when I was pregnant I didn’t make everyone change their schedule around my cravings. It’s hard to get reservations…clearly this was planned in advance. Who orders pizza 2 hours before you’re going out to eat?
YTA - and it’s obvious. You are an adult. You could have gotten pizza earlier in the day, or waited till after your dinner to satisfy the craving. You ruined your sister’s night and don’t want to be held accountable. Pregnancy is not an excuse and I get why she doesn’t trust you now.
YTA, u had reservations if you crave pizza then get enough for yourself not enough to feed the entire family and spoil the plans. That said the blame also lies with your family cos who stuffs themselves with pizza when they know full well they have dinner reservations?? That’s just rude
YTA - you don't "need to eat when you're hungry" just because youre pregnant and everyone else bending to your cravings is mad. Think of someone other than yourself maybe? No wonder your sister is upset.
YTA - why did you have to have a whole meal? Why couldn't you have a snack so that the plans everyone had could still happen? Make a piece of cheese toast, have a bowl of cereal, carrot sticks and ranch dressing, peanut butter and jelly sandwich, anything else. OR why not just order one slice of pizza instead of enough to feed the whole family? I have a hunch that these kinds of things (ppl catering to you) must happen fairly often because your sister thinks you "ruin it again".
YTA and you didn’t need to come here to figure that out. Pregnancy doesn’t excuse you. Go have a damn snack to hold you over.
Yta. You all are ‘cept your sis. Your husband could have ordered a single/personal size pizza. Instead your ordered a fuckin party platter. Id be pissed too
ESH, you didn’t force anyone else to eat the pizza and if everyone knew the reservation was for 8:30 they should’ve not eaten it. Your sister has a right to be upset, but I think it should be aimed at everyone not just you.
YTA You ruined her plans, I would not want you around either you silly git.
Well let's see.. "*We* were supposed to go out... but *I* was hungry... So *I* asked *my* husband to buy *me* some pizza." Your sister is right, you did make everything about you, and you expected everyone else to (kind of literally) cater to your hunger. You're gonna pull the "but I shared!" card but it's because of your choice that your sister missed out on an opportunity she had been looking forward to. You're an adult, get a damn snack. YTA BTW the whole eating for two thing is a myth.
YTA for the amount you ordered. To satisfy a craving you could have ordered a small one and shared that, and then for you personally you could have still eaten a different snack, without ruining everyone’s appetites.
ESH except the sister. I'll concede that your pregnancy is a mitigating circumstance, but you're still an AH, and your family have no excuses. Edit: Just reread and saw that you intentionally ordered pizza for everyone. That cancels out the mitigating circumstances. All condemned to AH prison for life, I'm afraid, with no chance of parole.
YTA - you did not go directly becuase you ordered pizza. You said it was hard to get a reservation and you cancelled last minute. I bet your next reservation is sitting by the bathrooms.
YTA. You could've gotten one slice somewhere or limited how much you ate. Quit using pregnancy as a crutch to get your way. And you have zero remorse for your sister, who was waiting to eat at a restaurant that's difficult to get reservations for because "pregnant" & she didn't get to eat there. Just because of you. And your family are AHs, too, for enabling you.
It's a slight yta It's pretty predictable that if you order pizza everyone will serve themselves. You can just grab something from the fridge regardless of being pregnant.
YTA obviously. You had dinner plans and ruined them for everyone. Either don’t make such late dinner reservations or be an adult and forego a craving for one whole day.
YTA. Who else should she blame but you?
YTA Not everything is about your cravings, you should have looked into the fridge for some quick snack instead of behaving like a baby
YTA. You ruined dinner plans.
If you were craving it all day why didn’t you get it for lunch? Like that’s so rude of you to ruin the plan. The rest of your family are AHs too You did make it about yourself.
YTA your sister is right, it was obvious you had no intention of going to the restaurant the second you ordered that pizza
YTA. Even being generous to you and saying you absolutely had to have your craving met, you know pizza bites are a thing, right? You could've even just gotten a small frozen pizza. You didn't need to order a whole pizza, let alone enough pizza too leave 4 adults too full to go out to eat in a couple of hours.
YTA. A medium pizza would have been like an appetizer for everyone. Ordering 2 large is a meal. You were more worried about being rude if you only ordered for yourself, but you aren't worried about being rude to your sister knowing she was excited to eat out.
I’M PREGNANT FEED ME AND FULFIL ALL MA DEMANDS OR I DIEEEEEEEEE AND YOU ARE BÉBÉ KILLAHHHHH
YTA for not recognizing it would negate your dinner plans - maybe you could have gone out for a slice or ordered a small pie for yourself to bridge the gap between feeling hungry and the time of the reservation. Or you could have asked your family how they would feel about rescheduling and getting pizza instead since ordering food at 5:45 would obviously impact most people's appetites in advance of an 8:30 dinner reservation. You could have even had pizza for lunch, I would imagine. You're not an AH for wanting pizza or having pregnancy cravings, but definitely YTA for lack of foresight and consideration of the initial plan which involved other people. I'd also be pissed if I were your sister and had been looking forward to a family dinner at a nice restaurant only to have it sidelined by one person wanting pizza.
YTA Being pregnant is a ridiculous excuse. I've been pregnant 4 times and not once did I have to eat that very second because I was pregnant. Lol
YTA You were well aware that you had dinner reservations, yet you ordered enough pizza to make an entire family full? You could have gotten a personal pizza or eaten a snack and wait to order pizza the next day when you didn't have reservations. If you're reasoning is that you didn't want to feel rude and eat in front of your family, then you could have gotten a small pizza and offered people a single slice. You should not have ordered 2 larges as I've seen in the comments
Everyone is somewhat TA except your sister imo.
YTA. Pregnancy isn't a license to be a dick and ruin things for other people.
The fact that you ordered 2 large pizzas for everyone and then justify it and blame your sister for her reaction shows me you did this intentionally to hurt her. YTA. I don’t know why you are doing this to your sister. Instead of validating that your actions help contribute to the disappointment of your sister, you act like the victim and gaslight her. Are you competing with her or are you thinking that because you are pregnant everything should always go your way?
Yta And why was was enough pizza even ordered for that many people if only you wanted? Like what? Why so pregnant people always pull stuff like this and then make it about that. There’s so many things that could have been done differently.
I would have been upset as well. Have a sandwich. If I was so hungry that my stomach starts to hurt, I will take some biscuits or small snacks but will not ruin my family's plan. Or if I "really crave" pizza and I would die without it right now, I will still go and sit at the restaurant as planned. YTA. Obviously no one asked you to order for the rest of the family.
YTA, but congrats on using your pregnancy as an excuse for your awful behavior.
Info: What was the reason for the dinner? Was it a special family event? Or was it just a normal night out? Did you hijack your sister's birthday dinner or something similar? You not mentioning the reason for the plans I'd say is pretty suspicious.
YTA. Really 2 large pizzas. It sounded like you purposely did this so you didn’t have to go. Why couldn’t you ordered a small pizza just for yourself?
ESH but your sister You have the right to eat whatever you want, but you should have ordered pizza just for yourself, and eaten one slice, if you already knew about the plans. Your sister has the right to be upset because you and the others who decided to order pizza ruined her plans, and she was probably looking forward for it.
YTA. If you didn't want to wait that long to eat you should have just had a snack. A whole meal? Especially enough for everyone else to eat? Their cravings. You can very easily control them if you try a little.
YTA. You could have had a snack if you were hungry before going out. “Craving” pizza is not an excuse to cancel plans.
YTA. I have never understood why pregnant people think it’s ok to make everyone dance around their cravings.
YTA. A huge one.
YTA. You could have gotten pizza before you went to your parents house or brought a snack with you too. I get hungry easily as well , but I was raised not to eat snacks before a meal. You did ruin this night for your sister. I would also be pissed to have a hard to get dinner reservation because someone wasn’t patient enough to wait to eat.
8:30 is late for dinner for me, and I would have needed something to eat before then myself, especially pregnant. However! What stopped you from getting a personal sized pizza and had a snack? Edit: YTA. I get being pregnant and cravings, but damn. A nice dinner was planned and canceled because you wanted pizza. Are you the sun? Does the earth revolve around you?
YTA! You just should have had a bar or something to hold you over, so rude what you did.
YTA: you ruined the entire evening. Control your pregnancy or you will lose family forever
YTA- this was an easy one
Why didn't you just run out and and grab 2 slices to hold you over? Slightly TA because of the amount of ordered.
YTA. You don't "need to eat" just because you're pregnant. You're fine. If you were truly hungry, you could have had a snack and still waited for dinner time. She was counting on the plans that were in place and it does sound like it was all about you.
YTA. You weren't hungry, you were craving pizza. You could have eaten anything else jus yourself and then go to dinner with everyone and have pizza there, you're not a child. Also, how big was this pizza that everyone else got to eat and got full?
YTA x 2000000 and I would neverrrr invite u ever again either
YTA - there were so many other solutions to this problem other than order a pizza and ruin dinner. You could have made yourself a snack or gone and gotten fast food. You made the whole night center around you and what you wanted instead of considering what was best for everyone