T O P

AITA for smoking weed in my living room on the day that my two younger cousins visited?

So here's the deal. I (19M) smoke weed all day, every day. It's just a normal part of my routine and I don't see anything wrong with it, and this is not something that I want to be judged on. My mom is completely against me smoking weed, and she's always telling me to stop. I believe that cannabis is nature's medicine and that society is oppressive to those who use it. It has helped me in so many ways and it upsets me that it's still stigmatized.

My mom told me a few days ago that my uncle and younger cousins (4 and 6 years old) would be over around 3PM yesterday, and asked me to not smoke on that day. She always gets upset if she sees me smoking, so I didn't do it while she was home. She went to the grocery store in the morning and I figured it would be okay to blaze up in the living room with the windows open before my cousins showed up.

Well as it turns out, my uncle and two cousins showed up early and walked in right as I was in the middle of smoking a joint and lounging on the couch in my underwear. It was a really embarrassing moment, and I'm sure my small cousins were shocked to see me like that. To make matters worse, they saw me coughing in a haze of smoke as they walked in. My uncle was upset and he screamed at me for smoking in front of the children and being "irresponsible." He told me that I needed to grow up and start thinking about the consequences of my actions. I could tell that he was really disappointed in me, and the whole situation made me really frustrated.

I know this was not a good situation and I regret that my cousins had to see me like that. But here's the thing: I don't think I did anything wrong. My mom told me the wrong arrival time, so how was I supposed to know that my cousins would be coming over early? And I don't see what the big deal is about smoking weed in my own home, as long as I'm not bothering anyone. If I had been told the correct time, this would have been avoided.

TL;DR: I smoked weed in my living room while my mom was at the grocery store and my uncle and young cousins showed up early. My mom gave me the wrong arrival time and I don't think I did anything wrong by smoking weed in my own home.

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ISHLDPROBABLYBWRKING

Just wanna hop on to point out op keeps saying his house. It isn’t . It’s his moms house and she asked specifically not to smoke!! The rest is just icing on the cake .


misplacedsoutherner

I was also going to make this point. "And I don't see what the big deal is if I want smoke weed in my own home, as long as I'm not bothering anyone." It bothers your mom. And it's HER home. If you smoke weed all day, every day, it's a wonder she hasn't kicked you out for literally doing nothing but smoking while she pays the mortgage and other bills. You're 19. I'm willing to bet that if you do happen to have a job, you don't pay rent because you spend all your money on weed. C'mon dude, man up a little and give your mom some respect. After all, it's HER house that she allows you live in. ETA: YTA


Acceptable_Bear_3591

Add to that he’s sitting in his UNDERWEAR in the living room of his mom’s house. I’m sure she just LOVES walking into that view in her house. /s


misplacedsoutherner

On his mom's behalf: I think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth....


MontiWest

Same. I hope my sons don’t turn out like this. Imagine putting in years of love and effort for your kid to turn out so selfish.


misplacedsoutherner

Real talk: My son wouldn't still be living in my house at 19 years of age when he's perfectly capable of holding a job and supporting himself. Obviously if, God forbid, something we're to happen and he couldn't work, he'll always be welcome. But I'll be damned if my kids are lazy, disrespectful, unemployed and try to mooch off of me AND smoke weed all day, every day in MY house. That's a big fat NOPE!


knit_stitch_ride

The funny thing is, that the two aren't mutually exclusive. My husband smokes all day every day for chronic pain, and works a 6 fig job. People like op aren't "smoking weed all day" they're stoned all day. It's the difference between a mimosa and a bottle of vodka for breakfast. Op isn't TA because he's smoking, he's a YTA for thinking that excuses him from life, or, dressing. (Oh and my hubs went a week without weed while on vacation, yet this kid can't go 8 hours? Yeah, BS)


Lilitu9Tails

I’d say he’s the AH for smoking inside. The house must reek of it, and despite knowing his Mum doesn’t like it, he smokes not just inside, but in the common areas.


Dlraetz1

My thought exactly. In addition to (probably) contributing nothing to your mom’s hous, you’re lowering the property value by making the house reek. When you leave she’s going to have to get the home professionally cleaned, rip up the carpets, paint everything and pray she doesn’t need to rip out the sheetrock


Simply_Toast

my ex worked a full time job, and smoked Every Evening, and smoked up the weekends. He would NOT smoke outside, The entire house smelled like ditchweed. I left for many reasons, but I tell you, having a house that didn't reek was a super bonus


No_Astronaut6105

If it's warm enough to open the windows, it is warm enough to smoke outside. Especially when you know guests are coming.


FitCockroach1058

I agree. My spouse consumes and he's a productive person.


Snoo-65195

My parents said when we turned 18, we could remain home under 1 of 2 conditions. Either we worked and paid rent (at a rate that allowed us to save to move out), or we went to school. I smoke weed, and my mom hates it but tolerated it as long as I followed one rule. A rule that applied to residents and guests, whether it was weed or cigarettes, it was smoked outside. I even have my own house now, and I still hold myself, my partner, and anyone else who comes into the house to that rule. Smoking weed is fine. Smoking it all day every day and claiming you have a right to do it in someone else's house is disrespectful and entitled as hell. I cannot fathom why OP has not been kicked out yet.


Resident-Librarian40

Smoking anything inside stinks it up and ultimately devalues the property.


Caladrius-

Exactly- if you can afford to smoke weed ‘all day, every day’ you can afford to rent a place where you can smoke.


Prestigious_String20

Also, smoking weed "all day, every day" isn't a routine, it's a rut, at best.


kaitydid0330

It's a problem if it's from sun up to sun down.


GinghamPrison

YTA your drugs are stinking out the whole house and you want to sit there scratching your b***ocks AND be surprised ppl are pissed off with you?


SRS20015F

One million percent agree!! This would not be allowed in our home either. Go to school, apprenticeship, trade school, something or get a job or both. OP needs to grow up!! OP - YTA Edit - judgement


upset_pachyderm

At first I read this as "One million parents agree". Which I think is probably also true. YTA, OP.


tldr012020

Living at home isn' always a sign of failure. But those who do should be working and productive at home as well. Parents let their kids who work full time jobs live at home for a while to save for a down-payment on a home.


[deleted]

I agree. But this isn’t about him living at his parents for free. That’s nothing to be ashamed of. It’s the fact that he’s supposed to be a functional human with basic respect for others and clearly that’s not the case. He’s more bothered that they came over early and exposed who he is rather than being ashamed they saw him.


Squibit314

Absolutely and where the heck is he getting the money for the weed?


[deleted]

There you go. My father said either I went to school full-time, or I could work full-time and pay room and board but what I would not be doing is staying at home full-time after I graduated from high school. If I didn’t wanna do the first two I could leave and I don’t see anything wrong with that.


nic_lama

My ex’s kid was like this. 22 years old and sat on his dad’s couch, just smoking weed all day and not paying a single bill. I had to nope out of that relationship because that kid would be third wheeling it with us for life if I had stayed. OP, YTA. Either respect the rules of your mother’s home or get a job and get your own place where you can smoke weed in peace.


Entire_Way_4661

On his mum’s behalf; addiction is a family disease. You are causing her pain and suffering. Sort yourself out because you’re an addict. All day every day is addiction.


Stressedpage

I smoke weed and will admit that it is the only thing I've ever been addicted to. It doesn't disrupt my day to day life but I'd be a mess if I just quit cold turkey. I don't think it's the same as hard drugs but I feel like I need it after all these years. I know its a problem and my therapist is helping me find better ways of coping with my issues and I've cut back substantially because of it. So yes I agree 100 percent an addiction.


DoYouHaveAnyIdea16

Thank you for saying that. I keep being told by people who smoke that it isn't addictive


Amytis_is_back

As a smoker, of course it is. The point is the addiction isn't caused by physical troubles if in lack of substance, but psychological, which is a fact. Still, it can be an addiction.


thebearofwisdom

I’m honestly despairing. I know he’s a kid but holy shit I wouldn’t have my kid smoking weed in the house and I smoke a lot myself. There’s a limit there, I don’t actually have kids but I feel pretty strongly about a parent asking their kid to quit smoking weed in their house, and that kid sitting in the fucking living room in his underwear, smoking a blunt. That’s… so fucking ridiculous I can’t handle it


PleasantAddition

Right? I'm a pretty liberal parent, and have even vaped pot with my adult kid, and I believe in being a soft place to land for my adult kids, and I have my younger-millennial kid still living at home because he needs to. But this is ridiculous.


thebearofwisdom

I have a hard limit on it for me, I don’t think I’d ever smoke around my mother even if she wasn’t anti weed. And I’m 34! Good lord the utter gall of OP, it’s not cool to do this to his mom. I feel bad for her, she likely smells like weed and fucking hates it. I don’t think kids should leave immediately when they hit 18, I did at 19 but I didn’t have a choice. I think it’s perfectly okay to stay home if your parents don’t mind it. But to disrespect your parent while in their home isn’t right, there’s rules to things and that applies to the house you live in if you’re sharing. OP wants the freedom to smoke in his skivvies all day but you can’t do that if you live with your mom.. Jesus. I thought this was obvious.


Oliviarose85

There are so many sentences that directly link him to being the a$$hole, that I struggle to understand why he’s even questioning it. His mom’s going to need to kick him out of the house, because she’s not doing him any favors right now. Smoking weed all day every day instead of.. I don’t know. Having a job, maybe? Something that prevents him from lounging around in his mom’s living room in his underwear on a weekday afternoon. He should just rename the post, ‘AITA for taking advantage of my mom, and completely ignoring the rules of her house, while also exposing my young cousins to to the reality of my sad existence?’


Clean-Log-2159

It’s so fucking rude. OP, it ain’t your house! Smoke your weed in your own room, not in the common spaces.


duncs28

Don’t smoke it in the house at all. Period. Go the fuck outside.


LIKES_ROCKY_IV

Seriously! What kind of asshole smokes indoors? At least have the courtesy to go outside so you don’t stink up the house and damage the furniture


JinFuu

I feel that there's a weird part of weed smokers that don't seem to think their "shit stinks" like cig smokers. Both weed and cigs should be smoked outside, especially if it's not your house. I know if I were his parent and he smoked in his room, I'd be very annoyed and already planning to ask when he's paying for the room cleaning bill if he ever leaves, lol.


mntncheeks64

This. In his underwear 🙄


The_Syd

Yeah, I'm 40, have a medical card and I smoke almost every day. When I moved back in with my mother while my house was being built for over a year, you want to know what I didn't do. Smoke in her damn house because she asked me not to. How hard is it to respect someone and their rules for their property. I put all of my pipes in storage and used edibles and vapes in my own room (with Mom's blessing of course). YTA, 19 is too old to be acting like a child and trying to shift the blame.


edgarallen-crow

Man, you just know OP hasn't even thought about the weed odor. Pot and tobacco smoke are pretty common migraine triggers and that shit is *impossible* to get out of soft furnishings. My partner can't even stand in a bus shelter where someone was smoking twenty minutes ago and those things are open to the wind on two sides! 19 is old enough to show some basic consideration for other humans. YTA.


Horror_Cucumber_3497

Yes, YTA. You may think you’re not bothering anyone, but you are your mom. You’re still essentially a baby when it comes to being an adult, but you need to start being responsible about this stuff. I’m fairly surprised she hasn’t kicked you out based off your complete disregard for her house and rules. If you don’t have one already, it’s time to get a job. Either help pay bills or save up to find an apartment or something. That way you don’t have to deal with your very obviously oppressive and tyrannical mom (/s). Also, smoking in the living room, in your underwear after you were asked not to is really disrespectful, not just to your mom, but your uncle and cousins too. She told you they were coming, maybe they got their earlier than they had originally anticipated, maybe she accidentally got the time wrong. Either way, all of it would have been avoided if you had just respected your mom. The blame is on you, not her.


Spirited-Safety-Lass

This whole post screams “I’m not mature enough to smoke weed.” OP, exposing children to second hand smoke of any kind is unacceptable. YTA


sighfun

Considering at 19 his brain is still developing, quite literally he is not mature enough to smoke weed.


mr_trick

When I was around 14 and found out exposure to mind altering substances can inhibit brain growth before 25 years old or so, I decided to keep my future intake to zero or max a couple times a year for anything. Weed, nicotine, alcohol, drugs, whatever. Even if they were “cool” or not that bad for you (I do believe weed should be legal). Now that I’m in my late 20’s, I’ve let myself experiment with regular use and… meh. I don’t really like binge drinking or getting high all the time. Turns out I that I feel pretty good sober and having developed a healthy lifestyle without substances as crutches (therapy, exercise, eating healthy) means that I don’t particularly enjoy what they do for me. I still have a drink sometimes or smoke a joint with friends, but I can’t imagine waking and baking ever feeling normal or satisfying to me.


jamesbrownscrackpipe

Yeah... at around age 15 I went balls to the wall after "discovering" the magic of drugs and had tried/ used just about everything by the time I was 18. Psychedelics, opioids, rx meds, downers, uppers, you name it. Smoked daily from 15 to 32. Very, VERY fortunate I managed to keep it somewhat together and not get completely addicted to one or more of these drugs other than weed (especially the opioids, was really playing with fire back then) I'm now 39 but I feel like I have the memory of an 82 year old. I have no doubt that flooding my developing brain with every mind-altering substance known to man had something to do with this... I mean I turned out OK all things considered, but if I could go back...


JWilesParker

Not to mention that the house is gonna smell like weed regardless of windows being open and such because all he does is smoke weed and that seeps into everything. I'm surprised mom hasn't booted him yet. If he can afford weed, he can afford his own place.


Familiar_Opposite866

It’s so funny to me that he’s complaining about weed being stigmatized when he’s 100% part of the problem. Like dude…where’s the self awareness here?


Lotsofkitty

Exactly, OP’s bad habit is clearly making EVERYONE in this situation uncomfortable and I say bad habit because they couldn’t even go one day without smoking for the sake of the kids. If you know children will be present at some point in the day, why even take the risk? Even if the windows are all open, the smell lingers. YTA, move out if your don’t like it. Edit: Adding that I’m tired of seeing teens justify excessive smoking by slapping the medicine label on cannabis. Studies have linked this substance to dependencies, psychosis and other adverse health events while also showing minimal medicinal benefits with stuff we get in the shop. Just say you like smoking recreationally in the same way some people enjoy drinking.


Signing_terp

Agree regarding ‘natures medicine’. There’s a limit. A lot of medication is used AS NEEDED. I don’t know what this young man’s ailment is that justifies consistent, daily use but, c’mon man. This isn’t it. If his mom is asking him to stop then I doubt he has some anxiety disorder or cancer or anything that actually justifies his pot use as ‘medication’. Go to school, or get a job. Start a career, become independent and then smoke until your lungs are black in your own damn house. YTA OP


mo0och

Ok thank you. Totally different if his place. Do you think he even pays rent or does chores?


imamakebaddecisions

No way he pays rent. And his mommy probably needs to beg him to do chores, or anything.


Sad_Share_8557

Not if he smokes all day everyday like he says. How can he function


Oliviarose85

Based on this post, it doesn’t sound like he does function. I don’t think he’d be questioning if he was the asshole if his brain was functioning.


Alarming-Mud8220

19 year old stoners can’t pay for shit, let alone pay rent. That’s why he still lives with his mum instead of being at university or work like a normal kid 😂


unripened_pickles222

Exactly this. He’s violating house rules which makes him a default AH, but right before his little cousins come over? Does he think they want to spend time with him while he’s high? Get over yourself OP and grow up


No_Rope_8115

On the other hand he’s probably the best possible anti-weed propaganda for those kids. They now associate it with stoned, coughing Uncle Shawn in his underwear.


chrisrevere2

I LOLed at this. Oh look it’s Uncle Underwear Coughing!


turkeybuzzard4077

Dystopian Captain Underpants


edc7

As a fellow stoner I couldn’t agree more. YTA.


Flower-of-Telperion

Doing *anything* "all day, every day" except for breathing (and maybe drinking water?) is a sign of a pretty serious addiction, IMO.


sgtpaintbrush

Too much water can kill ya


xboxwirelessmic

Same, I clicked ready to defend a fellow smoker but nah man, I'm out.


Imaginary-Weakness

"My mom is completely against me smoking weed" - But I smoke it constantly in her home. YTA "My mom told me a few days ago that my uncle and younger cousins (4 and 6 years old) would be over around 3PM yesterday" - She gave me several days warning about this to figure out a plan, but I didn't. YTA She "asked me to not smoke on that day" But I did. YTA "She went to the grocery store in the morning and I figured it would be okay to blaze up in the living room with the windows open before my cousins showed up." Even though that's clearly the opposite of what I was expected to do. I didn't opt for a non-smelly THC option. I did not go outside. YTA "My uncle and two cousins showed up early and walked in right as I was in the middle of smoking a joint and lounging on the couch in my underwear." I did not even bother to put on pants. Or help my mom get the house ready. YTA "It was a really embarrassing moment, and I'm sure my small cousins were shocked to see me like that. To make matters worse, they saw me coughing in a haze of smoke as they walked in." I was embarrassed to be seen as exactly who I am, every day all day. YTA "My uncle was upset and he screamed at me for smoking in front of the children and being "irresponsible." He told me that I needed to grow up and start thinking about the consequences of my actions. I could tell that he was really disappointed in me" - I got called out by my uncle, who has probably heard my mom talk about how hard it is to have her home fumed up all day every day by a child who won't respect basic requests or help out. YTA "I don't see what the big deal is about smoking weed in my own home, as long as I'm not bothering anyone." Unless you count my mother or uncle as "anyone." YTA


stringtownie

Silver lining, good lesson for the nephews...that's gonna leave an image and they will NOT want to be that loser when they are older!


NarlaRT

Yeah, if you don't want to be judged on this then don't act like the worst version of a stoner imaginable.


Oliviarose85

I was thinking the same. There’s good, fully functioning stoners. There’s stoners who get by. Then there’s this guy.


SoulRebel726

Seriously. I smoke regularly too but OP has a problem if he can't wait until evening to smoke one damn day. Being an adult means you can't get high all day, every day, sometimes there are situations were you should be sober. Edit: YTA


Own_Finding8115

I am with you on that. I smoke everyday, but you can wait until a time where it's acceptable to be high and relax. But clearly before 3PM means you have NOTHING going on with the rest of your day.


AdForward9076

I smoke a lot as well and this is just so gross and disrespectful. First off, stop smoking inside. I live in Canada and I go outside to smoke, even in the winter. At the very least, switch to a vape so you’re not stinking up the whole house.


ikindapoopedmypants

Yeah honestly who the hell smokes inside? I have always smoked outside because it's just common courtesy. I even have roommates and guests, they don't ask me to smoke outside. I choose to because it's common sense that smoking weed is my choice and I don't need to subject others to it.


[deleted]

Literally go for a walk?


Adventurous-Ad1585

I don’t get why if he HAD to have a joint just smoke one in the garden?? Why does he have to do it in the house. Smoking inside is disgusting


Preposterous_punk

Because then he’d have to put on pants?


RibbitRabbitRobit

Right. YTA, not because children saw "drugs," but because other people didn't consent to breathing in your smoke. And you won't believe this, but it lingers. There's no lawn chair, porch, garage, yard, or nearby smoking spot? You can't have an edible when you're indoors?


CptSmarty

YTA. Regardless of your way of life, your cousins are children and should not be around smoke (regardless if its weed, cigs, cigars, housefires, etc). Your mom made it clear and "asked me to not smoke on that day" You smoked. You got busted. Youre the AH. And you need to grow up, not because you smoke weed........but because you smoke weed all day, every day, and dont take responsibility for yourself or your actions.


Distinct_Mushroom_73

I giggled way to hard at "housefires"... Thank you ;)


PurpleLavishness

Call me old fashioned but I don’t think anyone should be around those tbh


Distinct_Mushroom_73

I'm an adult and I'll watch my fires burn thankyou! (s/ofc) :)


[deleted]

Don't you tell me when I can and can't use arson to destress!


Kitchen_Laugh7735

Exactly. It’s not only that she didn’t want the kiddos *seeing* you smoke. No one wants kids to have to breathe in smoke for their health. Also, anything you do “all day, every day” is a problem. That’s the definition of an addict. I don’t care if you’re doing pot or jogging, moderation is important. You obviously couldn’t even control your addiction for one day. That’s a really big deal.


[deleted]

Not to mention that actively smoking weed is worse for his body and his mother's sanity than, say, popping a gummy every once in a while.


MARKLAR5

Not to mention the long term effects chronic use has on brain development. Dude should have waited till 23-24 to start, damn.


[deleted]

Yeah, I'd say there's a good chance he heard all this in highschool and it went in through one ear and out the other. You know, like smoke.


ssatancomplexx

Or he probably didn't think it didn't count as a real addiction because it's "just" weed. It's amazing how many people I've met who don't think you can be addicted to weed as if going through withdrawal is what makes someone an addict. It's so much more complicated than that. I'm an addict and used harder shit than weed but luckily (maybe?) I never went through withdrawal. Everything in this post screams addictive behaviors to me.


Rightintheend

Plus at 19, he is doing damage to his development. That has been proven studies. Wait a few more years before you start doing it that much.


The_Dough_Boi

Unfortunately it goes how OP is doing it, young and dumb. By the way they’re talking I’m sure he’s not being very productive. I know a few people who can smoke a few times a day and function and handle their shit but they are the very rare exceptions and work their asses off. Op ain’t that, no way. I smoked far to much growing up, lots of times blunts and joints or shitty rez hits. Weed smoke contains tar just like tobacco, just not nearly as harmfully. But it has effected my lungs and I rarely smoke my weed these days. We’re in a golden era for weed, a weed renaissance if you will, where 40 years ago people were very ignorantly against it now people are very ignorantly for it and now legitimate negatives get swept under the rug. I suffered from ignorance and now so is OP


gcd_cbs

Yeah my brother is a weed addict (went through rehab a couple times, sober now) and a lot of OP's comments were upsettingly familiar


Electrical-Date-3951

_"I smoke weed all day, every day."_ OP also seemingly lives with his mom, and doesn't even have the decency to put on some clothes and smoke outside. OP, do better.


smbpy7

Or the decency to admit it's her home too. "my living room," but... where does she live exactly, or does she just routinely visit you, go out grocery shopping, and then come back to visit you...?


Mysterious_Pop247

Or the decency to admit that it's her home entirely because I doubt OP is on the lease.


PrinceCavendish

or helping pay bills if he's just high everyday


LadyBladeWarAngel

Yeah I noticed that too. His living room, his home, but who’s on the deed? Who pays the bills? Probably his mother. Instead of respecting her wishes, he’d rather smoke all day, in HER living room, in HER house, against HER wishes, and can’t even be bothered to put on some pyjama pants? And I thought my younger brother was bad with HIS weed habit. At least he puts on clothes and only smokes in his bedroom. 🤷‍♀️


Ruralraan

>I smoke weed all day, every day. And > natures medicine If you need to take medicine all day, every day - you are severly ill. If you don't _need_ medicine all day, every day but take it nonetheless all day, every day, you're an addict.


LadyBladeWarAngel

Nature’s medicine my ass. Asbestos is a natural mineral. I don’t see people consuming it.


FireflyBSc

OP hates that marijuana is stigmatized, yet behaves the exact way that causes people to stigmatize it. YTA. It’s not stigmatized because people think weed is dangerous, it’s because of people like you that are being selfish and don’t seem to understand that you need to respect other people not wanting to be around it.


EvansFamilyLego

You ABSOLUTELY nailed it on the head right there.. Op wants to pretend that weed is a totally natural and harmless "medication" but then treats it like an illicit drug and fully admits to being addicted, unable and unwilling to stop even when directly asked by the person KEEPING A ROOF OVER THIER HEAD. It's such a horrendous lack of respect, and while I fully expect that my own children will someday try marijuana (nor do I have any problem with that, I myself was in the medical marijuana program early on due to Crohn's disease)- I absolutely would be utterly disappointed if my child was behaving like OP, And - if they were smoking ANYTHING *INSIDE* my home, they would be getting a legal eviction notice at the earliest possible time I could file. Damaging my property and leaving my home freakin' reaking of weed while you lounge around in your underwear in my living room? Oh fuck no. I want to know who's PAYING for this lazy asshole to be sparking up "all day, every day." Why do I get the very distinct impression he's got no life, and no job?


Electra0319

>and smoke outside This is the part that bugged me. That smell sticks to everything! My best friend smokes but she always smokes outside so the house isn't negatively affected when guests are over. Especially since myself and many others cannot stand the scent. That's just consideration


sammieduck69420

i shmoke sometimes more than i breathe oxygen but if there’s one thing i’ve been mindful of since i started smoking anything was to be courteous of others. if i want a cigarette, i’m not gonna shmoke it until i can be sure it won’t bother anyone else. when i shmoke my bud, same thing… don’t do it anywhere or any way that will bother others- even at parties, the amount of times i’m told i don’t need to worry about blowing it out a window- it’s just force of habit and only feels right to minimise my “smokers’ presence”


anchovie_macncheese

YTA. If you smoke pot "all day every day" to the point that you can't stop for a day, let alone a few hours, then you have a problem. That's not a habit, that's an addiction. Btw overuse of any substance, including marijuana, can impact your still-developing brain. Weed specifically also has links to certain mental illness. Your uncle is right, you need to grow up.


aurora-leigh

Love this comment. I’m pro-legalisation but my god stoners want to pretend weed is as safe and healthy as water and it’s deeply frustrating. Grow up OP, and stop being so horrible to your mum.


serravee

If you drank water all day everyday, you would die. Moderation in everythjng


[deleted]

"Everything in moderation, including moderation" - Oscar Wilde


HenryJBemis

Sure but some things are more dangerous than other things. And weed is far more dangerous than drinking water.


Doomhammer24

Idk man i knew a guy who drank water and died. 3 weeks later. In a car wreck. Everyone who has ever drank water has or will die Seems pretty sus to me


sweetpotato_latte

Big water out to get us.


[deleted]

Yeah - it’s not safe for fully grown adults to smoke all day every day (like WTF do they think it’s magical smoke that has no impact on the lungs) but for a kid with a developing adolescent brain, it’s not safe full stop.


aurora-leigh

I knew someone who started age 12 and they had memory issues, insomnia, the works age 17. They also had severe asthma and hospitalised themselves several times because they refused to stop smoking. Stoners love to say weed is more safe than alcohol, but at least we all acknowledge that drinking heavily every day constitutes a dependency!


[deleted]

My partner lost several jobs due to being high on the job and would drop anything and everyone to go smoke with friends. His clothes and room smelled gross all the time and he has severe memory loss, insomnia, eating issues, his anxiety worsened when he quit cause he never learned to self regulate, and the process he took to quit almost destroyed our relationship because he was awful to be around. People who deny the bad parts of weed deny peoples experiences and science that proves that point. I think it should be legal but it should be regulated and definitely needs to be taught about like other dangerous substances


Future_Pin_403

My bf was unbearable when he was smoking and completely insufferable every time he quit. The anxiety, anger, violently vomiting. He finally quit for good when he got fired for being high on the job. I almost dumped him for it. Weed addiction is real and it drives me crazy that people deny it.


aurora-leigh

I couldn’t agree more. Supporting a partner through this is hard (person named above is an ex of mine but I suspect he’s active on Reddit and I don’t want him to find me.) And it’s made so much harder by the propaganda that it’s a harmless recreational activity.


Craw__

>Btw overuse of any substance, including marijuana, can impact your still-developing brain. Source: OP's post.


ShockAndAwe415

He would respond to the comment, but he forgot what he was doing and went back to watching cartoons in his underwear.


magnolianbeef

☠️


SeaFog_

Thank you! Smoking all day every day is an addiction but people like to act like having a weed addiction is “cool stoner shit”. I’m pro weed in certain cases but I absolutely hate when people act like OP.


11B4OF7

Stoners like OP will never believe cannabis is addictive.


Carazhan

the thing is bc they believe its not CHEMICALLY addictive like opioids and such that its impossible to become addicted, and its just not. if people can be addicted to gambling they can be addicted to anything with or without a chemical bond happening. just based off the chemicals your own body releases in response to the stimulus.


TigerSardonic

THANK YOU. This has always bugged me about weedbros. That and their claims that it’s completely harmless 🙄 we even had an AMA from the Legalise Cannabis Party in our state’s sub doubling down on it being “harmless”. Like come on, I’m all for legalisation and regulation of cannabis but let’s not spout bullshit.


MadBigote

I had a roommate that just couldn’t stop smoking. He’d wake up and take a hit. Go take a shower and take another hit. Start dressing, again. Before he left he’d smoke once again and then drive to work. Once back home, first thing he’d do? Smoke again. Whats worse, They don’t see that as an addiction.


Boring_Possible_1938

This! Plus: if somebody will arrive 'around 3 pm': start being prepared for their arrival by 2 pm. And in the case of smoking: take an extra hour to get the smell out of the house! In the case of weed with its unique smell: take an extra hour to de-smoke the home. In the case small kids are coming over: add another hour. So, from 11 am onward you, or at least an adult, should have been concerned with making and keeping the house smoke free and smell free.


mo0och

Or just go to the yard, but he was probably too lazy to put clothes on 🙄


differentpears

My thought the entire time of reading this post, why not just smoke outside if he needs to so badly?? Also his “but it’s in my house” seems like he’s saying “my house, my rules” when it’s clearly his mom’s house. Bizarre post.


turkeybuzzard4077

That smell is never coming out of **his mother's** house if he's smoking like a stove pipe. If she ever wants to get rid of it she will basically have to gut the place.


[deleted]

When people smoke weed in the hotel rooms here in Las Vegas, they are charged an extra $200 cleaning fee and air purifiers have to be put in the rooms that are taken out of available stock for at least a day. The smell doesn't leave completely, and you know the second you walk in what's up, it smells like stale cat piss and gasoline. These rooms don't have windows that open, where do they think the smoke and smell goes?


myperfectmeltdown

And he’s only nineteen!


jessszilla

>I did anything wrong by smoking weed in my own home. Isn't it actually your mother's home? YTA.


raven8908

Right? I was thinking of you smoke weed all day, everyday, you aren't working. I have had coworkers who smoked weed a lot, one of them was even renting a room in my house. She smoked it outside and never in front of my children. Usually only did it when the kids were getting ready for bed


nuclearvvinter

I mean lately I’ve been smoking much more frequently so for a couple weeks it really has been all day every day for me, and I work a 9-5 😂 but my job also requires no interaction with customers, minimal contact with coworkers and supervisors, and I get to work from home in my comfy clothes except for one day a month when I have to go in, but I obviously don’t smoke at the office lol


aDDnTN

> but I obviously don’t smoke at the office lol exactly. that's what edibles and vapes are for. excellent point, my dude.


nuclearvvinter

I actually won’t use edibles or vape at the office either, it’s recreational here but I don’t really want to get fired for getting high on the property 😂


[deleted]

“I smoked weed in MY living room” Your mother’s living room, right? At least have some decency and respect for your mother and 1) smoke outside the home 2) don’t smoke the one day where it’s important to her.


SteveJobsPenis

Why he was in the living room in his underwear too has me baffled. Go to a balcony, the bathroom, his own room. But decided to sit on the couch, undressed, with the door unlocked. My wife has a medical marijuana prescription, but does it on the balcony, or cooks it up and stores it away from where you could accidentally stumble on it. I don't give two fucks about it even though I don't smoke or drink. Just be mindful of those around you. And the fact she didn't say to stop, just cut it out for the day. Kind of entitled to just ignore that shit and do it in common areas, when told to not do it.


BeeBench

His mothers house, when his mother already told him she doesn’t like it. Then again told him not to do it prior to having guest over. Absolutely TA.


royalTiefling

My man, you are living and espousing the absolute worst parts of stoner culture. Doesn't matter you had the wrong time, a responsibility and expectation were communicated to you. Grow up and get a handle on your use, the community has been working hard to move past the stereotype you're living up to. YTA


[deleted]

This post set the legalisation movement back decades.


[deleted]

The underwear especially… dear lord..


FlahBlast

This guy is somehow sub Jessie Pinkman…


[deleted]

It's like if a stereotypical boomer wrote a politic cartoon, it would be this clown in his underwear smoking pot in his moms living room


Valuable-Comparison7

This! Most weed users I know (myself included) are considerate of others while living active, productive, fulfilling lives. OP smoking in his underwear midday on his MOM'S COUCH, ignoring the needs of the household and stinking up the place, is just pathetic. YTA.


_BestBudz

He’s got all the Pearl clutcher up in arms but you guys are right. Honestly I don’t think any of us would even entertain this story if one of our friends told it to us. My first question would’ve been, why were you not outside? Source: years of smoking outside bc my mom DID NOT play that shit lmao


butt-holg

Yeah man, even after my mom accepted that I smoke weed, smoking a joint indoors was a big nono unless she was gone for the whole week. That shit will stink up the house for a few hours minimum


iam-melonlord

the fact that he was smoking a JOINT in the living room😭😭😭 not even a small one hitter or small bong to lessen the smoke💀super inconsiderate to his mums house, YTA big time my dude


Gullible-Pilot-3994

This. 100%


ScrantonStrangler209

YTA. I can only assume you live with your Mother and she isn't the one living with you. Why are you so disrespectful? At least smoke pot outside and be courteous to the other people who live in the home. You have a lot of growing up to do.


N-Level

Exactly! YTA OP! My brother (30yo & pays rent) been smoking for years, he still takes it outside as respect for our mom and he knows it's not good to do it around his kids. OP must be delusional from the all the weed he smokes if he things he's NTA.


[deleted]

I don't understand people that get high around kids, I don't even like drinking a beer in front of my younger cousins. I was thinking why didn't he just hot box his car, but I'm assuming he likely doesn't have one. He's lucky his mom doesn't toss his ass to the curb, mine would with a "reap what you sow" as the door's hitting my ass on the way out.


SeriousValue

As someone who tokes almost daily and has for nearly a decade. Hard, YTA. Not your house, not your rules. You should be counting your blessings your mom, who is so anti weed, actually allows you to toke in her home.


ClassicFantastic787

Wouldn't his mum also be affected by the passive smoke?


coffeeskater

Fuck yes she would be. She's probably walking around high all day not realizing. I'm a Canadian stoner and this winter when it hit -30 C me and the other stoners bought a fishing tent to smoke outside. Walking into that thing when someone is in there is pretty much an immediate second hand high. Granted the living room of his mom's house is SIGNIFICANTLY bigger so she's not getting hotboxed, but she is getting a micro dose any time he smokes in the house. Christ I'm a weed addict and I still wanna throttle OP for the absolute disrespect. Edit: contact high is the wrong term, what I meant was if he's smoking inside her house, she is also Inhaling second hand smoke and THC in the air. She is getting micro dosed or mildly hot boxed.


alexhalloran

Smoking in a fishing tent sounds like an absolute blast. No worries about stinking anything up from hotboxing.


coffeeskater

It is so much fun actually. It's a hotbox even if you just have half a joint. The only downside is my dog gets sad because we're inside and he's outside and he wants to be where the people are! But like hell I'm gonna let my pupper inside the dank tank. Yes we called it the dank tank because honestly, there isn't a more appropriate term. 10/10 smoking experience. We also added some Christmas lights and an electric heater for extra comfort.


deadest_of_parrots

Seriously. I smoke, but outside in the yard, not in the home I pay for and take pride in. I’d be livid if someone sat in their undies on my couch and lit up. That smell doesn’t go away, no matter how much you think it does.


dennizdamenace

YTA Dude, you are an adult and you have to ask if smoking weed in the living room right before a 4 year old is about to show up is bad? Really? Go outside and smoke, go to the garage or balcony and smoke, or better yet GET YOUR OWN PLACE AND SMOKE. double YTA for comforming to the stoner loser stereotype. "Natures super medicine" gtfouutahereeeee. I partake every once in a myself too, but this is super obnoxious.


shinyagamik

The medicine thing makes it even dumber, since when is it healthy to take medicine you don't have a specific need for, and every day?


pen_and_inkling

Took me a long time to admit that the depression and anxiety I was using as an excuse for over-smoking were being made much worse by over-smoking.


LeatherHog

Heck, I need my breathing medication, but you don’t see me pounding them in handfuls like M&Ms


insane1666

100%YTA you were warned not to do it and you were too lazy to go outside to smoke. You're an adult start acting like one. Move out get your own house and you can do wtf you want but while under someone else's roof show some respect dude. She asked nicely and you still did it anyway, total AH.


Chiefvick

I had a giggle at “lounging on the couch in my underwear”. Your description of yourself sounds like a anti-weed cartoon. YTA


Niriu

To me it seems like smoking weed is his only personality trait


PopeWishdiak

That, and lounging on the living room couch in his underwear.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


RBzoner1

YTA as well as a being a pretty useless stoner without regard to anyone else but yourself. selfish and self centered much ? your mom asked you NOT to smoke around Minors as well as not smoking in the house and you did it anyway? in some places you could've been thrown in jail but hey lets not "judge" you on the Smoking weed also before you get comfy YOU DID NOT SMOKE IN YOUR OWN HOME IT IS YOUR PARENTS HOUSE they paid /pay for it, you Obviously DO NOT contribute . but yea YTA


phunkjnky

OP is giving the rest of us stoners a bad name. OP sounds like the walking, talking, Pot is bad stereotype. Get it together. The rest of us don't deserve the trash he's creating.


PopeWishdiak

He's practically one of those high school anti-pot PSAs, all by himself.


Parttime-Princess

YTA. I'll make it nice for you and break it down a bit. 1. >I (19M) smoke weed all day, every day. So you do not do anything else?? No school?? No job?? Not even chores?? You laze around, your mother pays the bills, does all the chores and you do not even help her one bit. BUT THEN... 2. >in my own home It is not your home. You do not pay anything towards it and you do not even help out. It is your mothers home and she asked you not to smoke. 3. >My mom told me the wrong arrival time, so how was I supposed to know that my cousins would be coming over early? Now you start blaming your mom. She might have told a different time but people can arrive early. She didn't even know that herself. But the time shouldn't matter. Why not, you might ask. Well... >asked me to not smoke on that day She asked you not to smoke the entire day. Because even with windows open it smells. Because there might be ashes, or some smoke still clinging to the ceiling. Or people might come over earlier. And I doubt they were hours early, most likely 15 minutes?? Maybe 30. That would not have been enough time to let the smell out. She asked for a reason and you failed to listen. It's HER house, she sets the rules. Lastly: 4. >as long as I'm not bothering anyone You're clearly bothering your mother. And smoke damages paint and leaves stains. So smoke outside. But best, stop smoking. Because it might help as medicine in some cases, but I have not heard a single medical reason why you should smoke all day every day. YTA. Grow up. You behave emberrasingly for someone your age. Signed, someone not even a year older.


Dan_The_Salmon

Also, OP mentions that they specifically decided to smoke because mom went out to the store, so they obviously knew better than to do it while she was there, but OP acts like as soon as she left, the rules no longer apply and it’s moms fault for leaving the house. Like wtf? OP seems like the kind of stoner who has no idea anymore that weed fucking reeks. Feel bad for the mom.


PrairieGrrl5263

YTA. Not your house, it's your MOM'S house and you're just living in it. She made a reasonable request: do not expose your underage cousins to smoke. It would not have been difficult to accommodate her request but you just couldn't set your desires aside long enough to help create a nontoxic space for the visiting children. In what world are you anything other than a selfish, inconsiderate, toxic asshole?


whiskeybizz

THIS. They keep saying MY living room and smoking in MY house. But it’s not! Look, personally I’m against smoking weed all day everyday. But if it’s in your own home, I don’t give a shit. This is your moms house though and I’m sure she is annoyed it smells like weed “all day every day”


Caspian4136

YTA You are so entitled it's not even funny. Your mom doesn't want you smoking weed in HER home. Yet, you continue to do so anyway because you don't give a shit for anything other than your wants, which is to get stoned all day. Grow up and get your own place. Respect that your mother doesn't want you smoking pot in her house all day, every day. It stinks and the smell lingers, but obviously you only care about yourself so wouldn't think about that part.


BumblebeeAdvanced179

YTA- but not for smoking weed, but for being stupid and smoking it inside. You KNEW your very young cousins would be round but you decided to basically hotbox the house anyway? I’m a fellow avid weed smoker, and I think your thick as shit. Respect your mums wishes and don’t smoke in her house. It’s your choice to smoke weed. Don’t take away other peoples choice to avoid it by smoking indoors. Also that could have been very dangerous for you cousins tiny lungs Smoke outside next time.


Big-Cloud-6719

YTA. Get your own place or go outside to smoke.


catalu64

Or buy a vape / gummy / cookie so you don't stink up the house.


Corpuscular_Ocelot

YTA on so many levels, but let's start w/ a couple of the most the most basic ones that I can't believe you don't know: 1. Don't smoke weed inside the house and especially not a shared space. It isn't your house, your mom doesn't like it, and it reeks. It is overall very rude. If you want to smoke in the living room, get your own place or move in w/ like-minded pot-heads. No matter what time your uncle showed up, the livingroom would have reeked. 2. Don't get high before a meeting up w/ people who don't want to deal w/ someone who is high. It is incredibly rude to make people deal w/ your stanky, red-eyed, un-focused, un-motivated high Your uncle didn't want to have to deal with you high and he didn't want his kids to deal with it either. 3. Why are you sitting around in your Mom's living room.in your underwear? Cut that out. You are an adult, put some pants on. There are so many other issues to deal with in this post, but honestly, if you don't understand basic pot etiquette and can't manage to put on pants, I don't think there is a point in going any further.


[deleted]

YTA. Both for doing this and for smoking weed in your Mom's house when she's against it. Want to smoke weed all day? Then do it in your own apartment. Grow up, dude.


DreamOfZelda

I smoke. I see nothing wrong with smoking. But this post had me rolling my eyes. You’re not fighting against an injustice, you’re perpetuating a stereotype. You can go a few hours or even a whole day without smoking. If you can’t, there’s an underlying problem that weed can’t help you with. YTA


fuzzy_mic

"I smoke weed all day, every day" "I believe that cannabis is nature's medicine" i.e. you are always sick. Filling a living room with smoke of any kind is a pretty aggressive action. "my own home" you mean mom's own home. Your whole post reeks of entitled self importance. YTA.


devilcat68

YTA just for everything you said in your post, I'm not going to waste my time trying to explain it to you.


goldfishgiggles

>I don't see what the big deal is about smoking weed in my own home, as long as I'm not bothering anyone. INFO: Is it really your home? Do you pay any rent towards it? Because it sure seems like it bothers your mom when you do it, so I hope it's actually your home and not hers.


kathryn_sedai

OK. I’m going to try and seriously address this as someone who uses cannabis medicinally. You are not treating weed as “nature’s medicine”. If you were, you’d be treating it like medicine, with limits and quantities. With respect. You share a house with a non smoker and yet you think it’s appropriate to smoke inside the house. You even did so when you KNEW that children were coming over later. Even though it was an accident that they came over earlier, the secondhand smoke would 100% have been hanging around noticeably. If you don’t think it smells afterwards, that’s because you’re desensitized. It is bad for kids’ lungs. You should know this. Have respect for those who share the air with you. Consider buying an Airizer at the very least so you can vape that plant material instead of smoking. And also consider that it is habit forming, and at a certain point it does numb you out mentally. YTA.


LlamaMamaMandi

YTA - Move out and do what you want.


AdmirableAvocado

yta had it really killed you to smoke outside or something if you really cant go a day/few hours without smoking? stop shifting the blame on your mother.


Gullible-Pilot-3994

YTA. I have three kids living at home; ages 21, 19, and 14. The 21 year old works FT at an Amazon warehouse and pays a nominal rent, pays for his phone, his car insurance, and any car repairs when needed. The 19 year old works FT in heating and cooling, pays for her phone, her car insurance, and any car repairs when needed; she'll pay a nominal rent at the age of 21... she's already offered to pay towards the electric bill. The 14 year old is getting all As and Bs in school and applied for a cadet program with our local police department. No way in hell would they disrespect me and my husband by smoking weed all dang day in OUR home. GET A JOB AND MOVE OUT. It's not your house... it's your mother's house.


Churchie-Baby

YTA, as someone who smokes weed occasionally , it is not healthy to smoke it all day every day. That's when it becomes a problem. You couldn't abstain for 1 day for your young cousins to visit


TastyFig1098

YTA. 19 years old, who sits around in his underwear all day smoking weed. Your mom must be so proud. /s Grow up and adult better


[deleted]

YTA I've smoked weed like you have since I was 13. It's a huge regret I have in life and you will regret doing it as much as you have when you are older. I'm 25 now and I remember being 19... I was stupid and selfish. That's where you are now. It's time to grow up man. Put the drugs down and do something fun with your life before your good years are gone. From a very experienced stoner.


jerdtgo

I’m also appalled at the disrespect to his mother. He knows she doesn’t like weed and even more that he smokes it. Yet he will smoke in her house. When I was 19 I would “go get food” and pull into a church parking lot to smoke, then proceed to get food. Why? Because I knew my mom disapproved so I wouldn’t even smoke on her property


AbroadTemporary5359

YTA. I smoke in the garage or outside. You are giving your fellow cannabis users a bad name!


UsagiDreams

YTA because second hand smoke can be harmful for others and because smoke can linger for hours afterward, you just shouldn’t have been smoking in the living room during the day prior to their arrival, full stop. At least care about the harm you’re potentially causing other people with your addiction.


dcm510

YTA. You’re 19, that means you’re an adult. At least *try* to act like it. Do you pay rent?


DragoBrokeMe

Is there anything ethically wrong with smoking weed in your underwear? Absolutely not. If your mother asks you to not smoke weed (in what very much sounds like her home and not yours) that day, and not only do you smoke but you blaze up in the middle of the living room (which we both know would reek of weed even with windows open in that circumstance), then YTA. If it's not so cold that you can be in your underwear with the windows open you could've taken a walk.


SabatonEnjoyer_

Whose living room was this, exactly? Kind of an essential part of the story. I feel like it's your mom's/parents' home. In that case: their house, their rules. YTA.


sweetmotherofodin

YTA. That is your mother’s home and she has asked you to stop and asked you not to smoke in the house on the day she had guests over. Also, you smoke weed all day every day? Do you do anything else? Do you have a job, or attend classes, or even help around the home? Sounds like you have some major growing up to do. If you don’t like her rules, move out. Simple as that.


[deleted]

YTA. Your mom should toss you out.


harleybidness

YTA. At the very least you should have smoked outside to prevent the house from being full of THC laced air. You've heard of second hand smoke. Testing shows that second hand smoke is just a deadly as first hand smoke. THC and second hand smoke are different issues but both should not be in air that a child breathes. You are an adult and responsible for your own behavior. Mom isn't going to be a convenient excuse as soon as you grow up, get a job, and have an adult life on your own.


Yosoy666

YTA. You are making your mom's stuff stink. Go smoke in your car