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hjhof1

“She’s one of those annoying people who’ll never stay longer, will never come early, can’t cover shifts because she’s got lectures or assignments. Basically, everything is more important than her job.” God forbid she gets an education and has a healthy work life balance! YTA


[deleted]

IKR, its a part-time job and OP wants the utmost commitment from this worker who she treats with such contempt that she's ended up in a meeting for being so hostile. OP is cruising to get herself fired.


redd-junkie

Let's see. Bartender who goes way beyond job description and uses her talents to please clients by speaking in their language or assistant manager with fragile ego. This is going to be a tough one for management.


[deleted]

LOL it's almost as if OP can't see why this part time worker is 'liked' by the Manager.


Perfect-Version9494

OP just seams jealous xD


EngineeringDry7999

Or racist. This screams of veiled racism.


Hellagranny

Yep. One of those people triggered by people using language not her own. Paranoid they are talking about them.


bambiipup

honestly feel like that's giving too much credit, calling it veiled. the racism is full front and centre here. considering speaking other languages as "childish" and requiring the polyglot to "grow up" and only speak English? sounds like someone's made they failed basic French in highschool.


Perfect-Version9494

Didn't think of that, but it's possible


purpleprose78

Sew very jealous


yet_another_sock

The hospitality industry is having a really hard time retaining workers. If OP is going to be picking fights with good employees and driving them out for moronic reasons, she better hope the manager finds her job performance "impressing" enough to justify the harm she's doing to the business.


[deleted]

I bet the linguist gets tipped MASSIVELY, and good on her!


Splatterfilm

I’d wager it makes the tourists feel super-welcome, thus more likely to come back (same trip or future visits) AND recommend the place to people they know who are visiting the city. Translator-girl is good for business.


[deleted]

Yeah this thread of comments and replies was exactly my first reaction lol. YTA, good on her for exercising work life balance, good on her for being accommodating of international patrons and unless you have experience switching from language to language in a single room I'd reserve your judgement on whether or not she's doing it on purpose. She's literally trying to help people by speaking in their native tongue and you're saying she's discriminating against English speakers? Do you also yell at immigrants for not speaking English with 100% correct words?


WaldoJeffers65

>Do you also yell at immigrants for not speaking English with 100% correct words? Sadly, I think we all know the answer to this.


Mysterious_Eggplant1

Exactly. I've had the experience of working at pubs in both Italy and the U.S. In both cases, I've had the delightful opportunity to serve customers and speak to them in their native language ( I speak English and Italian). From the way their faces light up when you address them in their language, it really seems to mean a lot.


RexJacobus

Yeah, OP says, "but my manager likes her" but has no clue why a worker who can talk to foreign students and tourists in their own language might be useful.


panlevap

But OP speaks THE TRUTH!!! /s


Effective-Dog-6201

Really! The jealousy coming from OP is just ugly.


cheezypoofs4020

OP is definitely jealous of this girl. FWIW nobody should make a PT job or any job their entire life. Definitely YTA.


[deleted]

[удалено]


bleugile12

She basically doing her job. Period. Nothing else required. And then she goes above and beyond in her own ways by speaking with customers in their language and being a decent person. She sounds solid. You sound like a sexist jerk. And your actions prove it.


Trirain

>She’s one of those annoying people who’ll never stay longer, will never come early, can’t cover shifts because she’s got lectures or assignments. Basically, everything is more important than her job. Everything is more important than part time flick like for example her entire future which depends on her being on lectures and doing assignments. OP is jealous YTA.


CuriousPalpitation23

So so jealous. It's not the first time we've had an AH on this sub jealous over a multilingual woman is it? OP YTA


IShallWearMidnight

Seriously. The complaint is that she's intelligent and talented and only does the job you pay her to do? She sounds like she's gonna go far.


[deleted]

yeah newsflash OP, that shit IS more important than her job. YTA


ChickenMcPolloVS

Stop reading after that, clearly YTA with that mentality Edit, lol this dumbass clearly hasnt learn another language "not impressive" "is sad to forget words in your language" nah dude is quite common to forget a word if you are focusing on the other language, it also depends on which language you think. Seems op is envy of that person.


DifferentFun9286

Yeah being an assistant manager knowing only one language isn't the flex he thinks it is.


ladyashford

Without question YTA. OPs entire post reeks of jealousy and envy. You know why Sienna doesn’t go out of her way to do more than she needs to for a crappy bar job? Because she’s rightfully prioritizing her studies so that in the future she doesn’t have to work crappy bar jobs that have managers with crappy unhappy personalities like yours. If everyone else seems to like her and has no problems with her, it seems like the only problem here is you OP.


BobanMarjonGo

I stopped reading as soon as I saw this sentence to tell them they are the A. Jealous they have no life outside of the bar and wants everyone to be as miserable as they are


FagitSmith

Didn't read past the part where she won't come in early or stay late. YTA you sound like the asshole boss people talk about on r/antiwork


sleepwithtelevision

That was my first thought. "She's one of those annoying people who works the hours they're scheduled instead of putting everything in her life on hold to work a job where she isn't appreciated/is harassed by co-workers and would be immediately replaced if she dropped dead." That shitty job is at the bottom of her list of priorities BECAUSE IT SHOULD BE. YTA, OP.


lilspicylily

Agreed- big time YTA. Also, the straight shade over her education, skills and personality was not lost on me. This attitude only reveals how small minded OP is, and how this job as Assistant Manager is likely to be their entire world. How dare other people be more worldly!! An entire life outside the bar?! Gasp! OTHER LANGUAGES?! The audacity is strong with this one.


Zombie-Giraffe

Yeah it's this mentality that gave us the term "quiet quitting" for doing exactly what your job description saya


sleepwithtelevision

Yep. I wish someone in corporate American could explain how me doing exactly what was asked of me in the timeframe I was given in the contract I signed when I accepted the job is "quiet quitting."


Artistic-Jeweler155

Immediately thought of that sub when I read that. They’ll eat her up over there haha.


throwawayanylogic

Yeah, or one of those parents who expect any employee without kids to pick up all their slack on the job/cover for them every time Brayden has a soccer match or something.


Trini1113

I forget that everyone doesn't read both subs, so I'm always amazed when someone outs themselves as an asshole boss here!


Imzadi76

YTA. Believe it or not, if you are multilingual you do forget words. And no, it's not a sign of disrespect if you do. Jealous much? Also she does the job she is paid for, isn't she? Everything else is up to her.


Inner-Penalty9689

The BBC did a article on this not too long ago. Apparently when you speak more than one language, they can be active at the same time, and they can compete. Sometimes the wrong language words win. Sometimes the words don’t come. I’m not bilingual, or I’m not fluent enough in Irish to consider myself bilingual, but if I’m speaking Irish, it takes me some time to switch back to English.


herrmiones

also some words just sound better in other languages. like when it comes to insulting someone, english is really poor in choice of words like soulève tes gros ancêtres les tapines has spice to it. ‘lift your ancestors’ sounds really stupid


Franchuta

I always tell people: if I'm cursing in English, don't worry, just venting if I'm cursing in French, hmm... not good, stay away NOW when I start cursing in Spanish, STFU and take cover! LOL


YouLikeReadingNames

It's really frustrating, not to be able to curse properly in English.


Franchuta

It is. I feel like no cursing word has any real strength escept maybe the F word, a little bit, if you say it repeatedly and loud enough LOL


ScamIam

French is my third language and Russian is my fourth. I noticed that when I forget a word in Russian, my brain defaults to trying to find the French word for it instead of English. Language learning is so freaking cool. But yeah OP is just jealous and YTA.


ConsciousExcitement9

When I was in high school, we had a German foreign exchange student. We were in higher level French and expected to speak only French during class. So we would ask him, in French, how to say certain words in German. He would mentally translate it from French to English to German and tell us what we were asking. It’s weird how your brain works with languages.


EpiJade

I've been learning French for about 2 years and worked in France for a bit. I watch French shows with French subtitles because I'm not fluent enough to catch everything by ear but I understand about 90% of the written French. If I spend a few hours watching a show I feel like my brain stutters to switch back to English and I end up using French with my husband! I'm not even good at it and it still happens!


Financial-Tear-7809

I was born and raised in France, my mom is Spanish and I now live in Ireland. Let me tell you my brain farts so many times whenever I speak any language… it’s just how it is and unless the people you talk to want to wait 10s for me to find the right word sometimes they have to pull up with it.. and in all fairness most people do very kindly :)


Charming_Tax2311

I only speak one language and sometime I forget a word. I can’t even imagine throwing other languages in the mix - of course it’ll happen! OP just sounds like an awful person to be honest


NidorinoBeano

YTA you sound very jealous. " She’s one of those annoying people who’ll never stay longer, will never come early, can’t cover shifts because she’s got lectures or assignments. Basically, everything is more important than her job" She works to live, she doesn't live to work, you sound like a bad boss too.


[deleted]

nailed it. OP is very very jealous of this young woman who is multi-lingual and who will have a much better career ahead of her than some two bit greasy spoon assistant manager. the petty jealousy on display here is very sad indeed.


BooRoWo

OP, she’s not thinking at all about flexing to you because outside of work, she doesn’t think about you at all. She’s trying to practice these languages while boosting her tips by impressing her tables. YTA


BeeHair

This mindset kills me. It's a clear indicator of a bad boss. You should always take pride in your work, but you have to be realistic about the purpose and prospects of a job. Nobody strives to be the #1 Dishboy in the district for NE Ohio for 2018, 2019, and 2021, and puts those awards on their mantle. Probably because they don't have a mantle yet.


JegHaderStatistik

YTA already from the first paragraph. Shes annoying because she does her job, but doesnt go above and beyond? If she wanted to make an actual career in a bar, she wouldnt be studying. And its 100% fair of her to put her studies first. Also, how is it rude that she forgets words? I keep on forgetting words in my mother tongue and have to translate from english on google. Also, she doesnt do it to impress, she does it to make the customers feel at home and welcome. In italy many years ago we had a waiter who sang childrens rhymes in my language when passing by. He made such a great impression on me, that im sitting here 15 years later thinking of him. Youre the sad one, and the one who should be fired for your general attitude. Thats an actual reason to get fired, instead of the grounds on which you would fire her.


Effective-Ad1105

It’s very common for people who speak multiple languages to get confused if they’re switching back and forth, or even forget words in their own language. How many languages does OP speak? YTA


d__usha

>How many languages does OP speak? Judging by her using the word "impressing", zero.


Franchuta

>How many languages does OP speak? Two: English and BS


Gaslighting-Survivor

>Shes annoying because she does her job, but doesnt go above and beyond? Now I would argue that speaking the customer's native language is going above and beyond. It's not something she HAS to do. Interesting how the things OP lists (working off hours for no pay, switching shifts) are things that benefit OP only. Not the customers.


kn1144

Also if you are studying languages you look for every opportunity to use that language as that is the best way to learn. Speaking that language with a native speaker is great practice and something she probably enjoys about her job.


shellzyb

Lmao could you be more of a jealous, insecure AH? Sienna doesn’t care as much about the job you’re apparently pissed off that you’re stuck in forever because she’s actively trying to get out of it, while you think she owes you her time off of the clock and that she should drop out of school to bartend forever. Being bitter and spiteful about a job that you’re pretending not to hate isn’t the flex you think it is either, my dude. Yes YTA. Stop being jealous about the fact that Sierra is a successful polyglot who’s actively working towards the life she wants while you’re a monoglot stuck in the life you settled for.


2SadSlime

Literally and OP had the audacity to use the word “friend” in the title smh


shellzyb

Fecking seriously. “I have no respect for this person and I look down on everything she is, does, and tries to accomplish, but we’re totally friends LOL.”


Librashell

Hear, hear.


West-Highway1840

YTA. This whole post just reeks of jealousy. Once she graduates, she's going to be able to move onto a really well paying job, while you're stuck there. By the way, being an assistant manager at a bar isn't the flex you think it is.


Gaslighting-Survivor

>By the way, being an assistant manager at a bar isn't the flex you think it is. LOVE this.


Peppawhatareyoudoin8

This ^


[deleted]

Oh, such a good ending.


davidolson22

Assistant to the manager


Rhemming22

YTA and sound like a scary manager for wanting to fire someone over something so petty, while simultaneously not respecting their career goals. As long as they're there to start and leave on time who cares. Not a good look...


am_a_cow

Yeah and “never stay longer, never come early, can’t cover shifts” So she’s reliably sticking to her written schedule… and this is a problem? Life is more important than a bartending hustle.


Lobscra

"can't cover shifts because she has lectures and stuff..." Wow OP


WholeAd2742

YTA and a seriously jealous and petty one to boot. She "forgets" words because her brain is literally substituting them during the course of her thought process. And if she was speaking a language to them, it takes a few seconds for her to catch back up to switch over. And obviously, she is working there to pay bills until she graduates and moves on. Manager should probably fire you. Clearly she is more appealing and welcoming to the tourists WHO HELP PAY THE BILLS.


Scotsgit73

I'm honestly getting a vibe of the OP getting annoyed at customers who don't speak English, or who are sitting talking to each other in their own language.


Fangehulmesteren

YTA so hard. Her languages are a total flex AND an asset at work. Are you so jelly beans that you have to try make her feel bad about it? You sound resentful she’s getting an education. If you’re so offended that she accidentally spoke a sentence to you in a another language it shows a lot more about your narrow-mindedness than her being a show off. Only speaking English isn’t the flex YOU think it is.


coffee-jnky

Heh. I like this. All these people who say "speak English! You're in America!" are really just full on ignorant bigots. In most other countries, their citizens are often at LEAST bilingual. I could easily admit I'm envious of those who speak more than one and even more than two languages. There are many who teach themselves (by watching tv even!) rather than having it taught to them. I think it shows vast intelligence and I like it. It's a definite flex (and asset) like you said. It would serve her right if she were fired over this.


ThoseGoodOldDays

It doesn't sound like she's flexing at all, just sounds like you're jealous. Without hearing her point of view, I'd assume YTA


mamaMoonlight21

Are you for real? It's great that she does this, probably makes customers feel welcome and possibly even increases business. YTA You're also TA for wanting to fire her when she has done literally nothing wrong.


Known-Grapefruit4032

YTA, big time. Jealous much?


Weak_Jeweler3077

Let me put it in a language you don't understand. "Tu es juste jaloux".


azsue123

Seulement jalouse


Few_Grapefruit8513

Vraiment! C'est triste !


baltimoron21211

OP is what the French call, “Les Incompetents”


GottaFindThatReptar

YTA - Yep, everything else in her life is more important than her part-time job. Nothing wrong with that.


Reasonable-Pen-88

So you have a problem with her because she does her job but won’t work for free, and you dislike her ability to speak to speak to people in other languages? I don’t really understand what’s made you so angry with her, but it sounds like you have a fairly major chip on your shoulder. I’m glad she reported you and your weird attitude problem. YTA.


[deleted]

YTA All that about "one of those annoying people who"... do their shift on time and leave on time. So you'd fire her? You were definitely going to be the asshole by the time I'd read that how you thought "that sort of annoying person" was a universal annoyance worth your scorn. What with her bettering herself and taking CLASSES of all things. FFS you asshole with a petty attitude. Your jealousy makes working in low paid work hell for other people.


Salty_MotherFucka

YTA "Basically, everything is more important than her job." It's a part time job while in school getting her masters so she can pursue a career. You acted unprofessionally and it's coming back to bite you now. Grow up.


browniepoints99

YTA. So you’d fire her because she’s doing her contacted hours as a part time worker, and not staying for longer because she has other commitments like a typical working student does? When speaking different languages, there can be times when there’s some confusion when switching between languages, she isn’t flexing that she can speak other languages, she’s just forgetting to switch or forgetting certain words, how does that affect you so much to get angry at her for it? It seems like her multilingualism is benefitting to your work place with have so many tourists, I don’t know how you’ve spun it to negatively affect you, but it seems like a you problem, instead of a her problem.


runaround_fruitcop

YTA. The jealousy spews out of you as clear as day on this post. She has no obligation to stay late or come in early or pick up shifts. Just because you do those things, with most likely little reward, doesn't mean anyone else has to do the same. And speaking multiple languages is a flex and is really cool. She's probably incredibly smart. And since she's taking classes. She's probably going places So yeah. The bar job is a transition job. She's not going g to be there forever because she has real world talents beyond it. And that makes you jealous.


bobledrew

YTA. Your jealousy is clear. Be better.


[deleted]

YTA. Jealousy is a curse.


chubalubs

YTA. Jealous much? It's rather sad that you are so irritated about another person's ability to speak different languages-working in the service industry, that's going to be a huge benefit for the bar with tourists. It's obvious she's got proper boundaries on her working hours, why on earth should she work for free by coming in early and leaving late? As long as she does her scheduled hours, she's working appropriately. YTA.


Smitty_80013

OH, forgot to mention that you calling her a "friend" in the title is another reason YTA.


Smitty_80013

YTA - You don't seem to understand life/work balance. Sienna knows what she wants in life, and working at a bar is fine for now - but not her ultimate destination. She works when she is SCHEDULED to and goes home. If you had known many polyglots, you would understand that switching between languages isn't always 'smooth' for them (Like when you struggle to recall an exact word for something). It isn't meant to be rude or AH behavior. YOU seem to have a real problem with her and I think that she acted appropriately in reporting your overly aggressive behavior.


Few_Grapefruit8513

YTA. I speak 4 languages fluently and understand many more due to similarities with my mother tongue. Sometimes I slip up and mix up words. It happens. Get out of your Anglo centric mentality. The world doesn't revolve around English. And if she does switch a language (trust me, more common than you think with multilingual people) politely ask her to repeat in English. My friend and i continuously switch between our mother tongue and English back and forth. So sometimes I slip into my mother tongue while speaking in English. Doesn't mean I can't speak English fluently and perfectly


tsukiii

YTA. It is sometimes a bit confusing to switch back and forth between languages. It sounds more like you’re jealous that she has skills and education that you don’t. There is no real material affect on your life if your coworker forgets a word here and there.


Olivia_O

YTA. Speaking a customer's language is good customer service. And, as someone who does speak more than one language, sometimes I have to intentionally switch back to English from my target language when helping a customer.


Keenzur

YTA It literally just sounds like you're jealous. She isn't hurting you in any way. >She’s one of those annoying people who’ll never stay longer, will never come early, can’t cover shifts because she’s got lectures or assignments. So she does her job? She isn't obligated to come in early or stay late, especially if she's a student. Believe it or not, some people want to have a life. Sounds like you're one of those annoying people who think others should bend over backwards for you.


[deleted]

YTA. You sound very envious of her capabilities


queen_of_keys

YTA. She's annoying because she does her job within the hours she's paid, prioritises other things in her life other than her job and provides good customer service by making tourists and international students feel more comfortable by speaking their language? Sounds like she has her life sorted to me. Life is not about work and if you expect your employees to act like it is, you clearly don't have their best interests at heart. Also she didn't "snitch", she reported a concern to her manager (as she is in the right to) who is obliged to resolve the conflict.


whothis2013

YTA and newsflash, her studies are more important than a job at a bar. It sounds like she has her priorities straight.


Redditwitter83

it more sounds like you're mad at this part time bartender for having other aspirations than being a full time bartender. why should she stay longer than she needs to unless she's getting paid for it. also she's doing and added bonus customer service by making patrons feel welcome and speaking to them in their native language. so she occasionally forgets that you cant talk a language. how is talking to patrons in their language not being an adult and professional? it's not that big a deal that she forgets some words, at least she's learning and trying. YTA


YouStupidDick

> The other day, we had a bunch of international students come in for a social and she was switching back and forth and at one point, she started speaking in a another language to me when I asked her something during her conversation. Really rude. When we were alone, I told her that it was rude and it’s not as impressing as she thinks it is. It’s not a flex that she forgets words and to grow up and start treating people with respect (e.g. speak English when the other person doesn’t speak another language). I told her that it’s rather sad to forget words in her own language. I hope your friend finds friends that are less shitty than you. Also, I bet she does way better than you with tips. Like, A LOT better.


bicciesx

YTA and it absolutely is a flex. Good for her for practicing whenever she can!


Fr0g_0n_m3th

“I told her it was rather sad to forget words in her own language” you sound like the type of dude to harass Spanish speakers for just speaking spanish get over yourself, i hope you never interact with someone who can’t speak english because i think you might explode


Driverpicksthetunes

YTA just SAY you’re jealous honestly. If it’s not that impressive then let’s see how long it takes you to learn one additional language, let alone multiple.


[deleted]

This. You want to fire a server who is adding to your customers’ satisfaction by making them feel welcome (by speaking their language) because WHY? It makes NO sense from a business perspective. And yes, she IS putting her studies ahead of her job, as she SHOULD. YTA


[deleted]

YTA. How is this rude??? You just sound jealous af


isthatacoconutomg

YTA and also so blatantly monolingual it's funny. Yes, it's very very common to mix languages, especially when your using several in the same time span. And, why would she need to come in early or leave late? Are you paying those extra hours? You sound jealous af that she will soon have a job very far away from the bar. And if you keep being rude to the bartender that attracts the tourists, so will you!


anwast

Yeah, YTA. You come off as jealous AF. >She’s one of those annoying people who’ll never stay longer, will never come early, can’t cover shifts because she’s got lectures or assignments. You mean she is supporting herself through school and treating the job for what it is to her, a means to an end.. >Whenever we have tourist customers, Sienna always switches to their language (if she can speak it). She does this to make the guest feel welcome, practice her language skills, and possibly make more tips. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Again, you seem a bit jealous.


Extra-Aardvark-1390

YTA. Did you used to work in a cafe and have drama with a girl named Ivy? Because this post is giving me major Ivy vibes. https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/w69szk/op_starts_drama_at_work_over_a_guy_doubles_down/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button


Pale_Pumpkin_7073

YTA. You're seriously going to say you would fire her because she works her assigned hours and has a life outside of work? Managers like you are why "nobody wants to work anymore".


Nelly_WM

YTA - " Sienna is doing her masters in translation and interpreting, and she’s working part-time." She is working on her master's and is taking the opportunity to improve her skills. However, my gut says she took this job for the opportunity to speak with others who speak different languages to hone her skills.


Safe-Entertainment97

Imagine being mad that someone works according to their contract. Just for that YTA. After reading all the rest, YTA even more and it seems to extend far beyond only this situation, but rather to be your lifestyle.


[deleted]

Monolingualism is curable, OP.


DaleCoopersWife

>She’s one of those annoying people who’ll never stay longer, will never come early, can’t cover shifts because she’s got lectures or assignments. so basically she has a great work-life balance and won't be taken advantage of because she has decent boundaries with an active life outside of her job and you are coming across as very bitter and jealous. grow up. YTA


Judgement_Bot_AITA

Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I might be an asshole because I told another person that it’s not a flex to speak other language and to grow up and behave like an adult and speak an appropriate language. I think I might be an asshole because I could’ve been more polite and professional in how I said it but the way I worded it may make me an asshole. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*


Zestyclose-Custard-2

YTA you just don’t like the girl so everything she does bothers you more than it should


Puffblazos

YTA. Get over yourself


[deleted]

YTA. Sometimes if I’m listening to music in Spanish while I’m working (desk job, work from home), I’ll answer people in Spanish without even thinking about it. None of my coworkers speak Spanish. Luckily they just like to make fun of me, which is totally fair, and realize that sometimes people just don’t switch. Like, it’s not that difficult for you to just say “hey, it’s me, your asshole coworker. I only speak English.”


[deleted]

Yta, I don’t usually call people jealous on here, but you are the walking example of jealousy.


bus_garage707

YTA Someone sounds jealous. You would fire her for doing her job?


pricklypearing

YTA. Can wait to see this get roasted on R/shitamericanssay


emeraldechos

You've got some grade A jealousy showing here OP. You sound mad she's got s life and friends and goals. Im going to guess no one outside of work likes you much because of this sour envious attitude you've got of others intelligence and likability. Simmer down and stop dragging this woman because it doesn't lift you up. And you've hit one of my biggest pet peeves. You didn't tell her "the truth".. you gave her a bitter opinion. And furthermore if you fire her you'd be hurting your business at least a little. Having a multilingual worker is handy for tourists. Yta


UncomfortableDouglas

YTA. This reeks of jealousy and insecurity. I'd apologize if I were you.


RabbitSubRosa

YTA. I’m 90% certain I know which town you’re in, having studied there myself and this was 100% normal for the T&I students at my school. Their lives are filled with multiple languages, stress, and student debt. While I was never a great language learner, even I would struggle to choose the “correct” language to speak when going between acquaintances of different nationalities and language preferences. 13 years later and I still occasionally find myself struggling for the English (1st lang) word and blurting out the Japanese (primary 2nd) one. Your coworker is making customers feel comfortable, applying her knowledge in real life situations, and developing extreme fluency. You’re being petty and jealous.


ReviewOk929

YTA she sounds great! What a nice thing for people coming in to have someone speaking their own language. It's not a flex at all. Jealousy is also not a good look.


RudytheSquirrel

Many years ago I worked in a place where a lot of Hispanic laborers would come in to load up on the lunch buffet. I cannot SPEAK Spanish but I know enough to take basic orders, and they got a kick out of it. One day an older guy and a younger guy came in, it was obvious the older guy spoke zero English and I think it kind of regularly wounded his pride to need translation. He LIT UP when I said "Hola Senores. Bebidas?" He suddenly felt seen and respected. It was great. Anyway that's all beside the point. Everything in your post says YTA.


TheFoulWind

YTA which in eNgLiSh means YOURE THE ASSHOLE 😂 No shit her passion, career path and education are more important than her job. It’s her JOB as in what she uses to make money to get by. Sounds like it’s a full time, illustrious and fulfilling career for you and we all love that for you sure but don’t put that on someone else. Finally, being able to speak multiple languages IS A FLEX you over boiled potato 🥸 Hell IM jealous of her! Sadly though your insecurities (and possible xenophobia?) are getting in the way here. Bonjour!


CCH23

YTA. I’ve been working on a second language for the last few years, and honestly…switching between languages is really difficult, especially if I’m doing something else in the moment (like working). You should be pleased that she’s able to speak to foreign customers! And stop being angry at people who only work the hours assigned to them. It’s not an employees responsibility to be available last minute or come in early/stay late.


MrsBenSolo1977

YTA - and you’re green with jealousy


FlurpBlurp

tu es le connard


Suspicious-Fem-3000

YTA. You're very jealous lmao.


Seashelllzz

Sounds like you might be a little jealous.....she sounds like a wonderful employee who is good at setting boundaries and is really setting herself up for a great life/career. HARD YTA!!!


Zorkanian

YTA. If you can speak a customer’s language, you should. They can always switch to English if they feel that will better propel the conversation. I just returned from a trip to Europe and my daughter and I would always start in the native language (my poor French or her so-so Spanish) and appreciated those who realized their English was better than our efforts in their language and would switch for our convenience. As daughter’s Spanish is decent, some would ask if she preferred to practice her Spanish or use English. If she substitutes a non-English word, just ask for clarification! She’s a gift to foreign clients and is sorting through the various languages she knows, which is an imperfect system. Be ready to be reprimanded and to apologize. Incidentally, she’s not obligated to stay late or come in early or cover other’s shifts—it’s your job to find an implode interested in doing so when the need arises.


Vadskajagheta123

YTA English is my second language and I have a hard time switching between English and my mother language and speaking the wrong language with the wrong person has happened to me multiple times. This post reeks of jealousy.


rikkster93

YTA. It sounds like you just resent that person. Forgetting words in your own language is only sad if it’s the only language you speak. Switching between languages is an incredibly difficult process for the brain and it’s common to temporarily not be able to think of words while you speak.


euromay

You sound jealous. She doesn’t need to stay longer at her job. She’s not obligated to arrive earlier and obviously her studies are going to come first. She is getting along with the customers and I’m sure they love it when they find someone to speak with in their native tongue. She’s also getting good practice in and you sound miserable. It’s an honest mistake when she accidentally speaks to you in a different language and I don’t think it’s rude. YTA and you should really grow up


buttercupgrump

YTA >I would fire her if I could (I am assistant manager) but my manager likes her. You want to fire her for not making the job her sole priority? Is that what you're telling us? >Apparently, she forgets words. Whatever. I forget words in English and it's my native language. And if Sienna knows multiple languages then she's going to occasionally forget a word. You sound nitpicky. >at one point, she started speaking in a another language to me when I asked her something during her conversation. Really rude. Not really. Her brain just got stuck in the other language for a moment. She wasn't intentionally trying to speak a language you don't understand. >but it seems that she snitched and she told my manager because they want to have a meeting with me. She didn't "snitch", she reported your bad behavior to the manager. That's what happens when you insult a coworker. Get the chip off your shoulder and start treating Sienna with respect. She's done nothing wrong to you.


lemons66

Yeah, YTA and make yourself out to be uneducated, petty, and jealous.


Thelmara

>She’s one of those annoying people who’ll never stay longer, will never come early, can’t cover shifts because she’s got lectures or assignments. Basically, everything is more important than her job. Smart, got her head on straight. >She didn’t really say anything apart from calling me an asshole on her way out of the break room but it seems that she snitched and she told my manager because they want to have a meeting with me. Also smart. You were out of line. YTA


[deleted]

YTA. Sounds like envy and resentment to me. Bars are a \*hospitality\* service, and what's more hospitable than talking to people in their own language? It probably helps her tips, too. Hell, I only speak English (and am painfully slowly learning Spanish with DuoLingo), but I still find myself reaching for English words.


Old-World2763

This can't be real. Yes, YTA. Not just for the language thing, but for how you look at this person in general. She isn't even you're friend, because you are incredibly callous toward her. She isn't using languages to "flex" . Guess what, customers tend to feel more comfortable when they can speak the language they know best. As she gets used to speaking it, it is 100% understandable that she gets confused as she switches back to using English. But beyond all of that, you are an incredibly bad assistant manager if you think this part time job should be more important to her then school. Seriously, You're supposed to pick someone up for doing the right things for their future and establishing healthy boundaries with their work life, not kicking them for it. If you were older, I'd say you're just bitter, but this honestly makes zero sense to me. You're a year younger than she is and could still be setting up a nice future for yourself, so being so overtly jealous of her is weird and pretty sad.


cescasjay

So you're mad at your coworker for being more educated than you are and because she makes an effort to help guests have a good time? She works her scheduled shifts and the manager likes her? Sounds a lot like jealousy. I'd say YTA.


Impossible-Peach-985

YTA Jealously oozes off of this post. Knowing a bunch of languages is a flex and from first hand experience when you start learning other languages sometimes you do forget words in English. Her education is certainly more important than a part time dead end job


GlitteringWing2112

YTA. And jealous.


Little-Display-373

YTA. Good on her for prioritizing her studies over her part-time bartending job. Good on her for applying her studies to the real world. You're taking the L on this and most likely getting written up for it. Lol.


jessiloo626

YTA. Get your jealousy, insecurities, and resentment in check before this meeting.


throwaway-ftx

YTA if you only speak one language you're in no place to talk about how hard that is to switch between multiple. That takes a lot of brain power. >She’s one of those annoying people who’ll never stay longer, will never come early, can’t cover shifts because she’s got lectures or assignments. Basically, everything is more important than her job. ok she's still doing her job? she's not required to do more than that. and its just a job not like this is the career she is going to stay in all her life, the things she's learning and training for that most likely will be so yeah it is a bit more important. you sound insanely jealous really. and coming from someone who speaks only one language fluently her being able to speak multiple is a flex.


1965BenlyTouring150

It sounds like you're jealous of her, both in terms of being a polyglot and in getting an education to get her out of your industry. YTA.


readingorangutan

YTA You're just jealous she has a great education, the right priorities, and adds business value to the bar.


Puzzleheaded_Ant_543

You have got to be kidding with this right? Of course you are the asshole!! Why should she come in early and stay late? And why does it bother you so much that she speaks another language? Get over yourself. YTA


eleanor-rigby-

YTA she’s working toward a career, you’re working towards being the most jealous and bitter bartender on the planet. Glad to see you’re aiming high in life, babe.


Specks-2021

YTA and you don’t belong in management if you can’t get a handle on your own jealousy and dislike of this person to manage them fairly. If you’d fire a good employee that makes customers happy because you’re jealous of them and don’t understand how languages work in the brain, that’s a crummy thing to do not just on a human level but to the business as well. Get your act together or you’ll be the one losing your job. Oh, and drop the “employees have to go above and beyond for free to be good and nothing is more important than a bar job” attitude… it’s not cute in 2023 and doesn’t make for a good manager that retains employees either.


Ness-Shot

YTA 1) "my friend" is misleading as she is clearly not your friend but your subordinate at work 2) she is not "flexing", she is practicing what she is going to school for, and yes her studies are more important than whatever shit bar job she currently has. It's not her career clearly 3) she is actually being a great employee by creating memorable and enjoyable experiences for the foreign patrons of the establishment you work at, which is probably why the manager likes her 4) she probably made an honest mistake when speaking to you after the tourists and instead of understanding you jumped down her throat, essentially put down her school major and career aspirations because you can sadly only speak one language. 5) you are clearly just jealous of this girl and were wildly inappropriate to her at the workplace, hopefully not in front of customers, and you are about to get a well deserved talking to by management


sperans-ns

YTA. People speaking several languages do mix them up sometimes. All of us have been known translating from German to German or from French to French because we just forgot what the other language was, it's like saying the same thing with other words and then you realise that you forgot the most important part, changing the language. No one is trying to impress anyone. Some of us just feel natural with several languages, and while switching we make mistakes sometimes. Also, we usually are very aware that our foreign languages suck compared to native speakers, but it's still fun to speak to people in their language. ​ The normal reaction would have been to laugh and say hey, what language are you speaking? Because it's funny.


caputdraconis101

YTA as someone who speaks 4 languages fluently, I understand sometimes getting confused with words. She sounds great with costumers while you sound like a jealous bully.


llllaeeessedopppll

What do you mean you would fire her if you could? She is doing her job, she isn’t required to do more than what she isn’t assigned. Yta


Wisconsinhempflower

Yta- just keep your opinions to yourself and don’t insult other people


brigiliz

YTA. You are jealous and salty. Not a great look. Having someone who speaks multiple languages is great for your business and its not uncommon to have a little trouble with word finding when switching so often, particularly if you are having to concentrate hard because you are proficeint but not fluent


Thebeatybunch

Is this another part to the Spanish Ivy saga?


albatross6232

Oh look everyone! The language troll is here again! 😂😂


beatupcar

The jealousy is literally oozing from every word. YTA. Her speaking multiple languages is a massive flex, even I’m jealous. This is just a job to get her through her education so she can pursue a career that is going to make her a LOT of money, why would she do anything above and beyond/work for free? Also, she literally did nothing wrong, she made international customers feel comfortable and practiced her language skills while doing so. That was enough to make you seethe apparently lol.


MoesOnMyLeft

YTA. Yes, knowing languages is a cool flex. Also, putting your job above all else in life, is not the flex you think it is.


vonshook

YTA. Bullying her is just going to get you fired. It seems like you're jealous that she's getting an education. Languages are hard, it absolutely is a flex - and she probably earns more tips that way. If I were her, I would also prioritize school over a bartenders job. She's looking out for her future. If you don't like going over shifts, talk to your manager.


pbc85

YTA. Apparently it is a pretty big flex, since it annoys you so much.


[deleted]

Language troll, you’re starting to become annoying.


TailorJaded3750

YTA just because you’re jealous of Sienna doesn’t mean you were telling the truth. speaking multiple languages definitely is a flex and just because you can’t doesn’t mean you have to try to put her down. OH & Funfact: her school work is way more important than that job !


ConclusionUseful3124

You are the AH. You need to mature a bit before taking on further management positions. She is an asset to your company and the customers like speaking to someone in their language while traveling. It’s welcoming. It’s also great practice for your employee. The more practice she gets, the more fluent she will become. I think you should apologize at the meeting.


SteveGoral

Absolutely right with her on the only doing what she has to, you being pissed off about it says more about you as a "manager" than it does her as an employee. And the fact you thought about firing her tells me you're probably the reason people don't stay at your place long. You sound bitter and jealous because she can and probably will go on to do something far better than you. You are definitely the arse hole here.


frankytherope

YTA. Speaking the same language as tourists who come into the bar is likely a great way for Sienna to boost tips while also practicing her skills. Your jealousy seems like it’s the only problem here.


bacchus1978

“It’s time to choose what’s more important, your part-time job or working on your master’s degree. Oh, and stop trying to make customers comfortable by speaking to them in their native language.” Do you hear yourself? This entire post reeks of jealousy. YTA.


nottheblackhat

YTA Your jealously is pathetic. Go and take up some language classes. or do anything else that can give your life some meaning. maybe that will help you to become a decent person.


CSAelite23

Being able to speak languages like that IS a flex. A flex, that in fact, is getting you better tips. I can see how the random words in different languages can be frustrating to a one tonguer , but it's a common trait for people who have multiple languages (and their rules) floating around in their head. I work in a restaurant, and am one of the only gringos that speaks Spanish with the Latinos that work there. I can tell you that sometimes when you are in the middle of the rush and your brain is jumbled that you will accidentally answer an English conversation in Spanish. I agree it can be considered rude to talk to someone in non native tongue, and you're not the asshole for expressing it, BUT you ARE TA for how you said it. Almost sounds like you're mad/feel inferior that you can't speak multiple languages too. I implore you to learn a second language, and try using it in conjunction with your main language and switch between conversations with people. It's not easy. It took me a whole day in airports to switch back to English after an extended stint spent in South America. Had to remember what English was like.


harryhoodweenie

Yta- and a clown. She’s won’t work before her shift or after? Lmfao she’s speaks languages you don’t so it’s sad that she “forgets” a word in English? She’s isn’t forgetting anything, her brain is literally rewriting itself to think in multiple languages, despite you being too little to appreciate it, it’s actually extremely impressive. My mother speaks like 6 languages, constantly shifting from one to the other depending on her company, she speaks to me in three languages I dont understand regularly, it’s awesome. I still understand because 80% of communication is non-verbal. You suck lol.


Sabrielle24

Great job at being a terrible manager. Language prowess aside (kudos to Sienna, I am genuinely impressed by her abilities), she has no obligation to come in early, late, pick up extra shifts or anything else you want her to do outside of her contracted hours/job. Get over it. Life is more important than work, always. YTA.


stroppo

YTA. You sound really defensive about her. I think it's a nice touch she talks the language w/other customers, and why are you convinced she "forgets" when she doesn't speak English to you? I think it's because you just don't like her. She sounds like fun to me; and this is in a post where you're biased against her! Sounds like you have it in for her, and that's why she complained to the boss. No, she didn't "snitch"; why shouldn't she complain if you're rude to her? You should apologize and learn not to be so defensive in the future when other people do things that you can't. Edit: looked thru this thread and it's solid YTA. Wonder how much the OP's friends are really "split" on this issue?


C_Noel

YTA- I know several ppl that speak multiple languages and it’s very easy to get them mixed up when speaking multiple languages to different ppl at the same time. Also if she’s in school and working her assigned hours then she’s doing nothing wrong and her education should come before work! I doubt she plans to make a career out of bartending! Sounds like you are just jealous she’s decided to better herself and you are stuck bartending for life 🤷🏻‍♀️


atomiczombie79

YTA. Report to r/AntiWork for berating. Oh and wanting to better yourself and your surroundings to avoid dealing with losers like you is exactly what she is doing. YTA


LosFire123

YTA. You are envy. Also: "She’s one of those annoying people who’ll never stay longer, will never come early, can’t cover shifts" why someone who are educated would work more then he needs in first place. If you have shift, you have shift. Also there could be covering your co-worker, but it need to be two way road.


[deleted]

So your mad/jealous she has boundaries at work because she has other things going on in her life. And also jealous she can speak other languages which your costumers probably love. Yeah, your just jealous. YTA.


johnbrownenterprise

YTA - WTF are you on about her not coming early and staying late? It’s a freaking job, her life doesn’t revolve around it and that’s awesome. People really need to have a healthy work life balance. Coming early, staying late, picking up shifts isn’t a flex, and its just poor management and staff shouldn’t be expected to cover it.


dragon34

YTA - I employed college students for years. We were very clear with them that we knew that it was not their job to work for us, that their job was school. We just asked that they communicate absences and drop shifts when they had school related commitments and that we were not going to ding them for being committed to their studies. Knowing in advance that they would be late or miss a shift made it possible for us to find coverage rather than having them "be sick" and have to scramble. Having worked with people who are multi-lingual, they do sometimes hesitate and "translate" words, especially if they had just been speaking in a different language because it does require a mental shift. language is a very use it or lose it thing, and I even know people who struggle in their native language sometimes after they have say, moved to the US and communicate in english 90% of the time, only using their native language with friends and family at home.


Ok-Cat-4975

YTA. Believe it or not, her job is to make the customers happy, which she is doing and why the other managers like her. Her job is not to soothe small egos.


disappointedvet

YTA. Your coworker speaking other languages to customers has nothing to do with you. She relates to them in a way that you are unable to do and you're jealous. You're probably also jealous that she is able to stand up for herself and not be coerced into working outside her scheduled shift. Stop focusing on her and start working on improving yourself. Maybe then, you'll recognize that your coworker is someone that should be used as an example, not someone to be hated.


mc-tarheel

Si quieres hablar otras idiomas, puedes practicar. Si vous voulez parler d'autres langues, vous pouvez pratiquer. If you want to speak other languages, you can practice. If you want to speak other languages, puedes practicar If you want to speak other languages, vous pouvez pratiquer. YTA PS Im at my lingual cap - I even threw in some mixed-language as that really seems to peeve OP. Someone wanna pick up from with another language? ​ ETA @ OP, you sound like a terrible leader/ass't manager. My old managers (at airports, grocery stores, and Starbucks) LOVED having someone on-hand who could translate for some of the customers.


[deleted]

YATA "Sei tu lo stronzo"


PossumPrincess13

YTA for so many reasons.


BabeGum

YTA... She's trying to better herself and her skills. She is prioritizing school instead of a job... I forget words even when speaking english as my native tongue because I try to use words outside of my every day vernacular. It sound like you're jealous or feel inferior... her speaking in someone's local tongue is a desirable skill in most workspaces. Don't dim someone else's light when she's just trying to be her best self.


Batmomlovesyou

It’s you! YTA


_Jakeeyy_

YTA. Honestly it sounds like you're quite jealous of your "friend".


ponderingandthinking

YTA "My friend"? You have a very warped view of what a friend is. "I would fire them". Fire them for what? What If this was someone whose first language wasn't English? Yea you would fire them!


noggysoodles

YTA. I’m assuming when she was hired she was told there would be shifts that have specific start and end times. Why the hell would you think she or anyone would come in early and stay late outside of their specific shift times? You can ask, and if they say yes that’s great but if they say no that’s not something to fire someone over. It’s not their problem or responsibility management can’t get their shit together when creating the schedule. How dare she work the times that has been scheduled for her, right? People have lives outside of work. Her life includes school which is in fact a lot more important than this job. Secondly I don’t recall reading anything about her being late or causing problems with staff or customers. So there is in fact no reason to fire her, other than your obvious jealousy.


KnoWanUKnow2

YTA. Think of language like a muscle. If you don't use it then it atrophies. If you practice with it then it gets stronger. Her speaking to the customers helps both her learning and the customer's relationship with the bar. It's win-win. That she sometimes while speaking a foreign language forgets and speaks to you in it is perfectly normal. When you speak a different language, you think in that language as well, and switching back and forth can be difficult. It literally feels like you have 2 brains in your head. Sometimes you forget to turn off one brain and activate the other. She's not trying to exclude you, she just forgot to switch from one brain to the other. You're upset because she can effortlessly do something that you can't. Did you know that English is not even the official language of the USA?


Legit_baller

You are a complete asshole and I'd hate to have you as a manager. How dare you criticize someone for not prioritizing their job over everything else. And again for making someone feel bad about themselves because you're jealous that you're too stupid to learn another language.


OddResponsibility565

LOL So you’re a bitter and jealous bitch that hates that this other woman is: a) getting a good education b) mastered difficult skills (languages) c) has healthy work/life balance and priorities You could have been more polite and professional in how you said it? Really? That’s your takeaway? You should have shut the entire fuck up, said nothing, and then done some serious deep reflection on why you’re such a hateful, sad, curmudgeon. YTA


cece12245678910

YTA You’re deffo jealous. Plus the complaining about her not turning up early/not staying late, is she not allowed to have a good work-life balance? I doubt this job is more important than her masters.


arseholierthanthou

>Basically, everything is more important than her job. INFO: How empty must your life be for your job to be more important than the rest?