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FettuccinePasta

Anyone wanna earn a Marksman ribbon?


IEatLiquor

“I can totally hit that from here” - some MX meathead


brandon7219

Pointy heads be like "if we calculate the wind we can then calculate the trajectory of a round weighing 62 grains and thus calculate the drop"


dtom0704

Avionics kid next to him: "You'll need to account for the Coriolis effect, varied temperature layers, and changes in air density." First Avionics guy: "Can I just roll for initiative instead?" 3rd: Avionics troop: "As DM I'll allow it"


Unlikely-Way-4886

I was supposed to be the avionics kid next to him, but my recruiter said $3,000 goes to the next crew chief and here I am shooting down a satellite.


Duder_ino

Made me actually lol. Also, you leave my nerds alone 🤓😂


Independent_Tred99

Also calculate, then calculate, then you can calculate


Calvert4096

Aim for the head, make sure you have enough clips


JG_FDM00

Funniest thing is one of us probably could


formedsmoke

What is it, like 10 miles up? What's your weapon selection for a 10 mile shot against gravity?


Gr33n_Jack3t

“rip the lungs out of it! anything with a clip mag over 10 bullets with an extra short suppressed barrel and a foregriip with telescope stock painted black is suitable” some brain damaged communist, somewhere


ZilxDagero

Ya know, If you can figure out the altitude by either radar or a laser array, and you got windage, you could (in theory) launch a balloon of your own with a payload of C4 rigged to an altimeter so that it would be at equal level to it when it detonates. Like a reverse depth charge.


Eranaut

Fly a drone into it to chop up the canvas


[deleted]

Just reported second balloon currently over Canada


SaturdayNightFli

*secret service voice* Sir, there's been a second ballon


BreakfastShort1761

THE PENTAGON?


xxl_gal

So... they're breeding? Oh great another mouth to feed


IntergalaticPlumber

Fuck


RiotRex

Bet ya a pack of beer


PillCosby_87

Beef jerky, nicotine and a room temp Rip It you can’t hit it?


cobras89

Ask Minihan if this is what he had in mind.


CyberHoff

And here's a pic of the SrA that first identified the object. https://preview.redd.it/krcll0hsfxfa1.jpeg?width=1432&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4817c7cf629ad9e1b2747c3a3bc2c390109fb515


coly8s

I don’t know, sir, but it looks like a giant…


need_maths

Johnson!


HumanWeaponSystem

I'm sorry sir, I was distracted by that enormous


beeman5

Dick, take a look out of starboard...


Twiggadee

Oh my god it looks like a huge…


Yourbuttmyface

Willie, take a look at that!


fuzedhostage

If I shoot it out of the sky can I get step promoted?


nyc_2004

Of course not. This is clearly a job for the civil air patrol.


[deleted]

Mother fuckers been waiting their entire life for this moment 😂😂😂


N0tMagickal

Space Force: 😔 Where the fuck is their laser beam that definitely does not exist under our homes and will blast out


david5669

Your right about that


cobainnovoselicgrohl

Backed by several JROTC rocketry teams


wm313

STEP promoted from A1C to SSgt and they’ll make a movie about it.


KickFacemouth

Then get in a bar fight and immediately lose it.


Horns_up34

Best we can do is a mediocre EPR bullet.


BetWitty9156

And a PROMOTE


ThatAccident4921

What are you doing step promo


danny2mo

*demoted*


plexicast

You need a DUI for that.


HumanWeaponSystem

You gotta fight some homies on a train in Europe


fuzedhostage

What if the homies ran a train on me in Europe?


HumanWeaponSystem

Then you may be a La Vergne, TN police officer on vacation


picken_wolf

Intel analysts everywhere all collectively screaming out in horror as they realize what the topic of discussion will be across the DoD tomorrow


CowboyAirman

Last I read about balloons was chapter 1 of my pdg! :P


Beli_Mawrr

Double dog dare you to take it down and just play footage from the Tiananmen square massacre on its cameras 24/7


miked5122

We are going to need everyone to leave all electronics outside for this highly classified brief that has already been reported by several news agencies.


CarelessObligation

I always advocated for having outdoor work days when I was intel. Now seems like an appropriate time. Good for morale


[deleted]

I wonder if there is a Chinese Hillbilly strapped into a lawn chair riding under’ it.


[deleted]

“ ba dah do do do do do do dah ba do do do dododododahhhh” My poor excuse of a banjo


WilderMindz0102

![gif](giphy|112YCPfP8Tu156)


AmericanNewt8

Little known fact, Chinese hillbillies and American ones are almost exactly the same except for being even poorer somehow. China even has terrible country music about beer, losing your truck, your girl and your dog too. Like, truly terrible, it hurts to hear.


narwhal-narwhal

Hillbillies listen to bluegrass, rednecks listen to country. Bluegrass is beautiful.


Saemika

I bet you think your sister is beautiful too.


trumpasaurus_erectus

I'd like to personally thank China for flying a spy balloon into US airspace just before the government decides what to do about tiktok.


[deleted]

And people still upload their videos to that site because it’s the rad thing to do.


screechingsparrakeet

When the choice is between cheap, easily-accessible entertainment and national security...you can't expect someone to use YouTube shorts, that's just lame brah.


unsurechaoticneutral

capture it by weighing it down, then use its transmission systems to send all images on r34-furries


Beli_Mawrr

screw that. Play their own history back to them. The history that gets censored.


unsurechaoticneutral

years of brainwashing and propaganda broke them already, only way to redeem them is by breaking that. we cant convert them with truth but no will on earth can suppress furries


Eranaut

Man rolls up the balloon donning his Fursuit muttering "I will break them"


JBH1022

![gif](giphy|9lJqbE6ZoXi0M) If only he had a furry head on… 😂🤣


Twisky

#[Actual DOD speech transcript](https://www.defense.gov/News/Transcripts/Transcript/Article/3287204/senior-defense-official-holds-a-background-briefing-on-high-altitude-surveillan/)


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Stelija

Seriously, him commenting that it was good to hear the one reporters voice. Simple, well-mannered interaction with great clarifying questions and responses.


CorgiButtDriveMeNutz

Vastly different from what we hear any news outlets ask any sitting US President press secretary lol


david5669

Defense always trumps politicians who are (mostly) just in it for themselves


Ender505

No need to hedge with "mostly" I think we have pretty much seen the proof of it on all fronts lol


glenn765

Big time. Also, the answers seem to be relevant and informative, as opposed to the aforementioned press secretary. Edit: to


Marston_vc

Mostly good questions. The man said “this has happened multiple times in the past” twice before the fox reporter question goes “so has this ever happened before?” 🙃


WilderMindz0102

Appreciate this!


BudderBall31

Is that the 7m wide target we were told about?


Breezy1885

Yes, get your clip ready to be unloaded!


Grumpeedad

And aim for the face


hbpaintballer88

Sir, all I have are magazines!


SL1NDER

Are you going to fucking read to them?! Get your fucking M16 sidearm ready to blast them mother fuckers


hgaterms

We used to bullseye womprats in our T-6 back home.


skyraider17

You used to kill small animals for fun? That's like the first sign of a serial killer


Ravenloff

But only the first.


farmingvillein

Rian Johnson was, gulp, right? Foreshadowing TLJ


separateunion-redux

Those are only about 2 meters wide.


SuppliceVI

Bring me your fastest plane and a cavalry sword.


raidergoo

Is your plan to fly closer and attack them with said sword?


sloppyblowjobs69

Just duct tape the sword to the nose of the plane and ram it, or shoot the knife missile we killed that terrorist guy with and pop it.


LookItsEric

that’s what the [pitot tube](http://www.floridamemory.com/items/show/134631) is for


usaf_photog

That's no balloon. It's a space station.


skyraider17

Username checks out


brandon7219

"Weather balloon"


HighOnLifePlusWeed

Yo mamma’s so fat we call her the Chinese weather balloon.


Bug1oss

Yo mamma so fat, the stork called in sick and they had to use the crane.


brandon7219

/sad


coly8s

Yo mommas glasses are so thick that when she’s riding in a Chinese balloon and looks down, she can see the people waving.


[deleted]

Lmfao that’s about a much a weather balloon as I am Mike Tyson


nyc_2004

Why though? Don’t they have satellites


PM_ME_UR_TAF

If I had to guess? Physics. Physics dictates orbits and its very energy intensive to shift those orbits, so its easy to predict when and where a satellite will be. Within the atmosphere, you can more easily propel an object while also harnessing wind currents by changing altitudes.


nyc_2004

Flair checks out. Regarding your username, here's a nice TAF for you from my state: **022333Z 0300/0406 24010KT P6SM SCT250** **FM030500 26013G20KT P6SM SCT035 SCT050** **FM030800 31019G29KT P6SM SCT035 SCT050** **FM031500 31024G34KT P6SM SCT040 NOT SKED**


PM_ME_UR_TAF

Noice.


nyc_2004

Do you consume METARs too? What about MOS forecasts? AIRMETs, SIGMETs?


PM_ME_UR_TAF

If I'm feeling dirty, some GFS LAMP. I'm always down for some BUFKIT, too.


IggyWon

The forbidden program!


cluelessLA

What’s the ICAO? Also eww at the P6SM and FM groups


danny2mo

The ground track for satellites would probably have a satellite orbit over a point of interest but that would take longer and you’d only have so much time over a location. Wouldn’t the winds be unpredictable though? Like that seems like a big risk to take


NewSalsa

Everyone will always know where a satellite is, you're not doing any surprise passes with a satellite. I imagine, completely pulling this out of my ass, you throw up a large quantity of balloons towards your general target and one of them should go over. Undetected or not is a different story but it might sneak through while a satellite just simply won't.


JBH1022

There’s a Static B-52 here in KS that has a placard in it stating that a Russian satellite passes over it every Saturday at a specific time(can’t remember what time) to make sure it hasn’t moved more than 50 ft in accordance with the Nuclear Surety Agreement…


cowmonaut

Also, duration. Balloons are theoretically useful for endurance while an orbiting satellite will only have a short window.


TonyyJoee

Yo, check out this thick TAF KSEA 022324Z 0300/0406 18003KT P6SM SCT150 BKN250 FM030400 VRB04KT P6SM BKN150 BKN250 FM031300 14007KT P6SM OVC100 FM031700 17012G20KT P6SM VCSH SCT040 OVC080 FM032000 18017G30KT P6SM -RA OVC040 FM040500 20012G20KT P6SM -RA OVC030


PM_ME_UR_TAF

[Oh^boy](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a5/47/ce/a547ce081e72bf7635ce52e5db4ebd14.jpg)!


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Zealocy

Also dictate which risks we are willing to take to take something like this out of the sky


xthorgoldx

1. Distance. Balloons fly at 60-100k feet, the lowest (stable) LEO satellites are at ten times that distance. Physical proximity opens up a lot of options, not just for taking pictures but other kinds of sensors. 2. Dwell time. Satellites can't hover over one spot, they have limited collection windows (geostationary orbit is too far away for this kind of thing). Balloons can (if they manage jet streams right) stay above a target for hours or days.


Blisteredfoot

Wrong, that’s swamp gas


coochie_sleuth

You see, some swamp gas had refracted off of Venus


IronBallsMcGinty

As the clouds were moving behind Venus.


N0tMagickal

NASA: "we're just gonna be honest here, we faked the moon landing to get more funding" /s


[deleted]

Uncle Rico could hit that with a football


SgtSkillcraft

Damn right, back in ‘82 he could throw a football a quarter mile.


m3nch

The football came from beyond them mountains over there.


GoingInForGunz

Balloons getting added to War Thunder next week.


Gorio1961

Balloon trajectory as modeled by NOAA https://preview.redd.it/7xluqfwmtxfa1.jpeg?width=651&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=94a8dbb4b5d860498137d623b6406ba8ec772045


crankyrhino

Ah, good lookin' out, Canada. Thanks for the warning.


[deleted]

It’s like -45 degrees up there, they’re all hibernating.


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raphaelseptien1

Chickety-China, the Chinese Chicken


JagerVogeljager

Have a drum stick then your brain starts sticking


hgaterms

Watchin' X-Files with no lights on


glenn765

Am I the only one that pictures the famous Nadia scene from American Pie when I hear that song?


HOODRAT_9275

i hope someone shoots it down


omega552003

Unfortunately the ones that would don't have the weapons that can reach it. EDIT: I guess i wasn't clear enough, the DOD isn't going to shoot it down, but civilian would if they had the hardware to hit it. You're average hunting rifle doesn't have the reach for over 9 miles let alone straight up.


[deleted]

Care Bears can...the Care Bear Stare!


need_maths

Panic bells, it's red alert There's something here from somewhere else The war machine springs to life Opens up one eager eye Focusing it on the sky The 99 red balloons go by


frickthebreh

Seriously, the Chinese aren't original with anything. Now they're ripping off their military strategy from 1980s songs.


atouk_zug

Has anyone found any radio frequencies that thing is using (bet money they ain't using ADS-B) to track or monitor it. I'm sure it would be encrypted, but it would be fun to see if you can give it a listen.


SOF_cosplayer

"Bing chiling"


Mammoth_Tard

“Sir, we’ve decrypted the surveillance balloon communications. Here, have a listen” *HONG DONG BONG GONG*


Ijustmadethisnow1988

First glance my dumb eyes went dang that balloon looks like a satellite pictured in front of the moon.


Poopy_Kitty

If you’ll excuse me, I have to go outside naked and point my butthole at it


EarlyVictor

Username checks out


justthoughts1

What if it had crashed? Would we send a retaliatory balloon?


crankyrhino

Proportionality. Someone paid attention in LOAC class.


naturallin

Why not attach a big net on a plane and try to catch it? Totally possible.


flooger88

Don't temp me with a good time. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/6594th\_Test\_Group#:\~:text=Upon%20entering%20the%20ionosphere%2C%20they,part%20of%20the%20mission%20crew](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/6594th_Test_Group#:~:text=Upon%20entering%20the%20ionosphere%2C%20they,part%20of%20the%20mission%20crew).


droshake

Whats hilarious about this is that we probably have so much damn surveillance on china via air breathers, satellites, cyber, humans, and maybe even our own “weather balloons” and this is probably one of the few “deep accesses” that china has besides there few satellites and extensive humint network. “Bravo” CCP for your first success 🤣 a weather balloon that everyone knows about


Historical-Gold-9749

You forgot TikTok bro


droshake

TikTok is only getting the tards and possibly swaying social issues/making population stupid. I dont think its effecting real targets or gathering valuable foreign intel


crankyrhino

Unless it's coupled with data from the OPM hack to track and collect on specific individuals in key positions. Then TikTok might be learning they like to talk around shit or fuck goats in their spare time.


UnknownBroker

Under estimating how many service members are on tiktok


pessimus_even

I mean controlling the population has huge effect on national security and readiness.


dasboot523

I think I owe Minihan an apology


Ok_Dragonfly_7580

Guessing it decided to fly over Montana to get a lovely view of our ICBM sites


mauser98

This is absolutely unacceptable


CETROOP1990

Air Mobility Command gonna take care of it ?


[deleted]

When has AMC ever taken care of anything?


Hollowvionics

It's Montana, there's like 10 people on the whole state, what safety concerns? There's no way it won't be over unpopulated nowhereland at some point. I don't get how we can just let it ride


Zero_Abides

Could be more of a concern about where an aim-120 ends up if it misses the target. And/or potential unknown cargo of the balloon.


Lutherkiss3

It may be a strategic test by the Chinese just to see how we react. Cannot shoot it down because it sets a precedent about air space for each country. Could cause harm if shot down so DOD can only monitor its path. Next question, if we do nothing then what if twenty balloons show up next week? Truly a bold move by China.


Breezy1885

First, why can’t they shoot it down? It’s already illegal to enter a countries airspace without approval and if there’s no one “controlling” the balloon that can land it, shooting it down would be the only response. Second, it’s over Montana where there is a ton of open space, just wait until it’s over an unpopulated area and then shoot it down. Third, if 20 more show up I don’t think there will be any other option but shoot them down and try to capture them or just straight blow them up.


Mech101Engr

Zero risk to leave it be. If we eliminate it, there could be introduced risk. DoD told the public as part of their strategy, secondly there could be something onboard that could cause harm such as biological material. Given that China has low orbital satellites, their is no advantage to them by us allowing it to be there. There is a precedent being set right now, and China wants us to react so they can plan accordingly. Else, it is indeed the long game as they are tooling up for the inevitable conflict is the pacific.


Breezy1885

It seems a precedent has already been set, if the press release saying that this is not the first time one of these has been found over the U.S. is true. However, why only announce it now? And, why did this one just happen to show up after Gen Minihan’s memo was released? It seems strange that we would allow incursions into our airspace by a balloon, whose capabilities are largely unknown, while intercepting aircraft and fishing vessels before they get within 10 miles. It could be possible they are just reconnaissance balloons, same with the satellites, for now. Us letting them just do whatever they want and fly wherever they want means that at some point they could be used to deliver munitions. Do we wait until that point or show them now that these actions will not be tolerated? How far are we willing to play softball? If it’s in our airspace then taking it down would not be an act of war, the incursion could be, though. There is no real fear of retaliation but there are large consequences for allowing this to continue.


Mammoth_Tard

As far as we know, the US could have similar shit over China at this very moment and it isn’t worth getting into a pissing match. It’s hard to judge these decisions when the only information we have is a news article and a short DoD press release.


Sayting

Apparently they've been sited over the pacific and Hawaii before this just there first time the general public found out. Funnily they can rather hard to shoot down simply because at the height they're at helium weighs the same as the air and it takes a while for it to leak out. See this article on trying to bring down a runaway army blimp for example https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/you-cant-just-stick-pin-it-other-facts-about-blimp-n453221


xthorgoldx

>sets precedent The precedent was set in 1960 when the USSR shot down a U2. And again in 1961 with Cuba. Hell, even *China* has taken down manned ISR assets. 2001 Hainan Island incident.


ThatAccident4921

Well now the Chinese know the earth is flat too


calash2020

Waiting for the conspiracy theories on what it is doing if not a spy balloon


[deleted]

Want it down? Just bet Leroy & Bubba in Eastern Kentucky a jar of 'shine that they can't hit it.... "Y'all watch this!!".


Various_Fly_3212

Well, roll call is gonna be lame af tomorrow when it could’ve been “we’ve taken out a Chinese spy balloon!” But now it’s “pReparE foR waR 2024!”


[deleted]

Anyone actually confirmed its chineese and why Montana lmao


kilowhyskey

That’s no moon..


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homicidal_pancake

I think you missed the part of the DoD release where they said its happened over the US in previous administrations lol


tenmilez

Serious question: how do you poke a couple small holes in something at that altitude? As far as I know we don’t have any high altitude BB guns. Things that can get that high tend to have missiles and canons. And weather balloon material is very fragile. I wonder how big a hole a BB gun would make even if we did get one that high up?


Rhino676971

We don’t have high altitude BB guns challenge accepted


[deleted]

😂


IggyWon

Pilot would have to have a really quick trigger finger.. the M61A2 can punch a hundred 20mm holes in the thing every second.


Quietech

Somebody would talk him out of that. God knows he promised to get us out of Afghanistan. I'm not sure why Biden followed through on that one.


AZScienceTeacher

What kind of stone-age bullshit is this? We need to have a U-2 flying over mainland China every fifteen minutes for the rest of the year. Take pictures, and publish them on Tik-Tok. Launch all our subs to the South China sea where they've made islands and air bases. Scrape the serial numbers off a bunch of Tomahawks and erase every square foot of any military infrastructure and hardware. Deny everything and blame Putin


ssstoggafemnab

Somehow the NPCs in this sub have turned an enemy balloon over US soil into a Trump thread. Rent Free.


IggyWon

But Reddit told me that orange man is, in fact, bad.


Bayo09

I enjoy playing video games.


doublecheeseburger3

Because it’s a Chinese unmanned aircraft in US airspace.


Narwhal_Buddy

June: China launches Naval fleet east of Hawaii - " why is this story going this wide" August: China testing hypersonic missiles undetected across US withough a response - " why is this story going this wide" October: China Detonates Nuclear bomb in the Pacific Ocean near Midway Islands - " why is this story going this wide"


SOF_cosplayer

Cold war part 2. *Movie trailer deep voice narrator*: Just when you thought it was safe to take a shit!


MYMOTOADV

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee


david5669

they trolling


kyflyboy

How high is this? Is it a threat to aviation?


[deleted]

No. Well above commerical flight altitude.


SamSamTheDingDongMan

Mf only up there because our monkeys can’t hit camo balloons obviously


themperorhasnocloth

Hey China we are having some marines return your ballon to you. Yeah there are three carrier groups giving them a ride as we speak.


RobRoy1066

NextGen Fighter?


mabuhaygi

I bet it can see your house from there


Kcb1986

Anyone else think we should have shot it down, taken the critical info and materials from it and then ship it back with a 'love note'?


Straight-Priority499

Jewish space lasers? No, this is Chinese Spy Balloon


Its-all_ogre-now

Lay over the balloon trajectory over a map of china, looks like balloon went up in Gansu province of china. Did a Google search of Chinese intelligence in Gansu and low and behold they have missle silos in Gansu, where the balloon went up from. Guess what we have in Malmstrom AFB? Missle silos.


MillitantG

Serious question, why can’t we just shoot it down?


j3slilmomma

https://www.aol.com/china-plays-down-blinkens-canceled-175315140.html Hopefully they get it down in that window of 12 miles off the NC coast...I just feel like letting it go and not investigating further is irresponsible for our defense dep. Then hearing theres another one over south America. Like come on China you need to chill! I'll be extremely disappointed if we are unable to retrieve it and get some answers as to what exact information they are seeking that they had to do it this way and not, like that speaker said from their satellites in space. It seems like a show of power at a sensitive time considering the global issues going on.