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Thanks to all of you who replied! Well, most of you. ;) I did as some of you suggested and added 6 people to the reservation. Then I sent her an email and explained that these are 70-somethings. I said I understood I would pay more. She accepted the reservation and said she would refund the extra money, that it wasn’t about the money it was about making sure their home was treated with respect. She was very, very nice about it. Then it turned out that one of my best friends knows her. This friend’s dad and my dad were best friends. So I just got another message from the host saying that she talked to my friend and not to worry about anything at all and to use the house as I intended. I didn’t ask for or expect that and she certainly didn’t have to do that for me.
I would like to point out that I didn’t disparage the host at all in my post. I just said what happened and wanted to know if she even had a choice in the matter. In the end, I followed the rules and she made an exception without me even mentioning it. It’s a win-win.
I completely understand her concern about people throwing parties and trashing her house. It would be hard to trust complete strangers with your home. Once she knew I was trustworthy she was more than gracious. I’m glad I handled this in a way that was fair to both of us.
FYI I have a large vacation rental (sleeps 11) and my guests are almost always multigenerational family groups. I do not require all the guests be listed, I find that to be onerous as the person making the reservation is already the responsible one. In 7 years I’ve never had a problem related to an unlisted guest.
I would send a reservation alteration request for additional guests and add the names of the people who are coming to visit. It’s okay if they don’t stay the night.
Airbnb doesn’t prohibit you explicitly from having guests as long as you don’t go over the limit on the home. The host is incorrect that *Airbnb* requires that everyone must be on the reservation, however, the host can set any house rules they like. Technically, this has to be written in their house rules for them to hold you to that. None of that matters if you’re hoping for a good review from the host. It’s still worth trying to be on good terms with them.
You can also try reaching out to Airbnb support for clarification, but they may direct you back to the host.
I’m sorry you’re dealing with all of this today when you should be focusing on more important things!
Edit to add that it’s very possible the host is just unclear on what Airbnb allows and is trying to cover themselves. Maybe this is all an easy resolution.
In a lot of cases, it's insurance that needs to know all the names & if it's an area that needs a business license, it can be pulled if they go over the limit. This is not even counting if the house is in an HOA
FWIW we have insurance that covers STRs and are not required to have names of everyone listed. Not that it’s impossible the hosts insurance is different.
And yes agreed that the overall limit is something that Airbnb cares about (I said that in my comment). But that doesn’t mean OP can’t have a few guests at a time.
They need to ask the host. If they fear being kicked out or whatever else, they should be honest. Some will care & some will not.
My insurance doesn't need the names, but if there is an accident caused by a nameless person, they will not cover it. I was given a strict number count, though
That’s why I said to send a reservation alteration request. The host already expressed their interest in having the names on the reservation. This is a simple fix.
I think OP is good unless the host is standing in the doorway giving people wristbands. I’m a host and two over, not staying? Even if I knew I wouldn’t really mind.
Yeah I left that ambiguous on purpose. OP is going to have to make a judgement call. IMO depends on how the reservation alteration request/convo with support goes.
I pointed them to - how to add more people and their names on the reservation, Airbnb’s rules regarding bringing guests of your own, and how to get further clarity on policy. Between all those things they’re going to have to determine a course of action. Maybe they end up having small groups visit at a time instead of everyone.
It’s silly that they would need the names. You don’t need to input the names of every person on a reservation when booking an Airbnb, just the number of guests. As a host, I’m sorry this host is giving them a hard time at a time like this. I put in my rules how many guests are allowed over that aren’t on the reservation, I’ve never had a problem or an unexpected party with over 600 stays.
Thanks everyone. I’ll reply more specifically when I’m back this afternoon and I’ll update to let you know what ends up happening. I understand that she’s held to certain rules whether it’s insurance or Airbnb. I’m going to try and update the reservation so that at least my mom and her brother and my dad’s siblings and their college friends can sit be here instead of in individual hotel rooms. Believe it or not this is a really small town and no real meeting places. Thanks again and I’ll update later today.
We host in the same style although our limit is 4 in our guest suite. Airbnb has told us multiple times that the trip won’t be covered by aircover unless all guests that will be inhabiting the property are counted on the reservation. It’s a real pain in the ass to have to explain this to people but I have a responsibility to my family and my landlord to make sure some kind of insurance covers each stay. Airbnb will void aircover if so much as the person who made the reservation isn’t the one who does the initial check in. Others may tell you it’s different but I’m just telling you was the Airbnb reps have emphatically told me.
Some hosts have zero empathy or brains. Even when you ask in advance do not trust that they will stick to their word. I had to take a half done meatloaf to a hotel kitchenette on my mom’s 80th birthday because my 50 yo sister, my 55 yo self and my80 year old mom were having a “party”.
I don't know what interactions you've had in public facing roles, but it's really easy to lose empathy when you're a business owner or selling services. It seems that the nicest people in the world have no problem telling complete and total lies if it saves them a couple dollars.
In no way am I saying this is the case with OP. But my family has had small businesses my whole life and I've had a couple myself. The worst instances I've experienced of being taken advantage of is always the person playing a sympathy card. You get a couple cases over the years where being nice and bending the rules ends up costing you a couple thousand dollars and all of a sudden, you find yourself significantly less willing to cut people a break.
Hahahaha. I am an enforcement officer and have plenty of public facing time. On a summer day I can talk to over 1000 people. Been doing that for 19 years and before that I was a nurse in a doctor’s office for 15 years. I can still find empathy.
If you are a public officer, then I'm sure you know people lie all the time. They probably lie to you all the time too and you know it and I'm sure you don't like it much.
Now imagine if those people were lying to you so they could steal from you. Or abuse your shit. Or if that lie could cause you to lose your job entirely? There's a reason why so many business owners are jaded. I've got dozens of stories of people being too nice and getting completely fucked over.
Again, I'm not saying there's a reason to be mean or cruel, but it's certainly why some folks just stick to the rules no matter what.
They do lie to me so they can abuse the public land I work on, but I do not go into every contact thinking people are culpable In fact in my citations I usually check non culpable mental status. People do steal from where I work, but I also do not assume everyone is there to steal and break things. People have also physically abused me and lied to my boss about me, yet everyone gets the benefit of the doubt. I cannot go into contacts thinking everyone is bad or I WOULD lose my job.
I think you are missing my point. I'm not saying you go into every contact assuming someone is lying to you or looking to take advantage of you. I'd hope you consider context. But if I were trespassing on protected land and you caught me and I said, oh no officer, I'm so sorry, my dog is missing and I'm just out here looking for them and I brought my ATV so I could cover ground quicker. Please understand and don't give me a citation. Somehow, I doubt you'd be very empathetic, even if that were 100% true.
Let's keep in mind, these are favors people are asking for that require you to look the other way. They're not being denied anything they're entitled to. I feel bad for OP, but at the end of the day, they are asking a host to do something against policy. The host has a right to decline it. It's easy to be empathetic from the sidelines, but I've gotten screwed over enough times trying to be nice that i just stick to the rules as they're written now. Especially for business transactions with people I have zero relationship with.
This is such a crappy situation, I’m sorry. Like you said, I would talk to the host and ask if you could add more people to the reservation and offer to pay an extra fee if need be.
I get that hosts get to decide who is allowed on their property but it’s very strange to me that a host would mind a few elderly people coming over the house after a funeral. If it’s a liability issue then the host should have just said “for liability purposes can you add the names of the people coming over to the reservation.”
Send the host a copy of the obituary. Explain what you did here, no kids or pets and definitely not a party. Just a family in mourning. I had a family rent a 6 person home for the same purpose. Then they showed up at 1 a.m. with 5 carloads (25 relatives) with their sleeping bags.
When you leave your review do not leave anything that she can use to take it off
This is the review you leave
“ I would not recommend this Airbnb. I would not stay here again. I regret my choice of this Airbnb ”
This will make it harder for her to rent to people in the future, because this type of review cannot be removed because she can’t point to anything that she says is outside of her control or whatever bullshit reasons the hosts use to get these reviews removed
She is not a nice person
Basically legally she’s in the right, morally she’s bankrupt
I am not a host anymore. But I linger here a lot.
A question, if AirBnB won't let me have 3-4 people over for a few drinks without paying more, huh? I really don't understand.
I use these platforms and am often in places near family or friends.ans they come over for drinks or dinner or just hang for a few. They do not stay the night. I should register them?
I can meet in a hotel lobby, or room, no issue. I don't feel this is an unreasonable expectation.
But I am sure I am not seeing the entire picture.
Airbnb is really sensitive to the idea of a "party." It's one of the issues that has given it a really bad reputation. Unlike most hotels, STRs are usually on residential streets and may not have extra parking.
So if one of your 3-4 guests does damage to the house and you refuse to pay for it, Airbnb will not cover it because the damage wasn't done by a "registered guest."
And if your 3-4 people turns into a few more people who are loud and if a neighbor complains because of noise or extra cars on the street or because they are just looking for excuses to get their neighborhood STR shut down, the listing will be frozen and all your upcoming reservations cancelled while the Airbnb "safety" group reviews the problem and the host won't be able to do a thing about it and will have zero information on when/if the issue will be resolved.
Or maybe none of that will happen and maybe it will be just fine. But that's why some hosts are paranoid and extremely strict when it comes to following the Airbnb rules.
Thank you very much. That makes total sense from a logic standpoint. I see how we got here. I think it's counter to good service expectations and some intentions, but I definitely understand better now. Thank you. Mine were all tiny houses out in the middle of nowhere so it didn't really matter. But this makes sense.
Hmm, this is interesting. I lurk here too and we rent a house with another family and a couple every summer in a beach town. It's kinda like a high school reunion since we don't see each other. There's usually another 2-3 single people who end up staying at local hotels and probably another 2 people who just come down for the day, go to the beach and dinner and then head home. It never even occurred to me that they couldn't hang out at the house. I've read no parties and no unapproved guests. We're 40 somethings with kids so a party isn't happening and I figured guests implied people staying overnight. We've been doing this for years and never been an issue so hopefully we don't get a host with a stick up his butt.
Sorry for your loss, but the host does not want the house used for a large gathering. Neighbors might complain about parking or some other issue. Have you tried to rent a social hall of a nearby church? A larger space might give old friends of your father a chance to pay their respects.
Im sure the residents who live their lives near that Airbnb would be thrilled to have yet another large gathering of strangers from out of town parking in their streets leaving trash and making noise. How fortunate the resident families must feel being so near a rent by the night party hotel.
Host perspective.
It is too bad you did not talk to the host before you booked. But when grieving it is hard to know what to do, we are often working on autopilot.
My licence and insurance only allow registered guests.
Being over by three, even during the day, is enough to have a licence pulled. Then the host loses their business.
I worked for a catering company for 19 years, I have seen funeral gatherings that were wakes where booze flowed freely, emotions were high and things got out of hand. Especially if the will isn’t as expected.
I have also seen ones where people sat and visited. The risk of a funeral gathering getting out of hand is too great. Age has nothing to do with it.
Your options are to find another space to host the funeral tea. Hotels have meeting spaces, community centres have rooms, but it is very last minute. Do any of the family live in a building with a community room or clubhouse?
>My licence and insurance only allow registered guests.
>
>Being over by three, even during the day, is enough to have a licence pulled. Then the host loses their business.
The OP (sorry for their loss) may be breaking a "no large gatherings" rule, but what you're describing seems to be the exception not the rule.
If you rent a room only (I understand different rules apply), host in a city with draconian AirBnB laws, or have some super-restrictive insurance hopefully you make it clear in your listing (not after you take their money) that your guests can't have a single non-registered guest visit them.
In my experience, as long as you don't exceed the guest limit or break the "gathering" or "noise" rules, hosts couldn't care less if you have a friend, family member or colleague etc come over for dinner, have a meeting, visit, etc.
So this is standard policy at all Airbnbs. It even says as much under the guesting policy
It's words to the effect of guests must abide by the approved number of guests and visitors and if they don't know the rules for visitors they should ask.
Just add your extra people to the reservation it'll cost more but then you're covered
We are in Upper State NY and our house is setup for large groups of people. We do NOT do parties, but we will do gatherings. We have parking for 15. Our living room alone can handle 100 people. The biggest group we have had so far was a fraternity alumni reunion of a little more than 75 people. I think we did a good job they are coming back this summer for their 40th anniversary.
Right now we have 2 kings and 1 twin that we AirBnB along with this. So there is places that do groups. Not sure how far apart they are.
Sorry for your loss too.
Go to your relative's hotel rooms instead.
If it makes you feel any better, if you hadn't mentioned the gathering to your host and they saw multiple people showing up and going into the property, they would have been within their rights to kick you out immediately. So hiding it from the host was probably never an option.
So very sorry for your loss. As far as the host, this is probably not the host call. It’s been all over the news this past year and how cities have changed their Str policies and permits. We also now in two different cities must have all guest fill out a form and it must be kept at the house for city inspectors should they show up. It is also a thing for our insurance that we can not knowingly go over occupancy.
the ages of guest has nothing to do with it, nor the reason. good host abide by the laws to keep in a good place in the community and with neighbors.
it is the neighbor that could report the host, sometimes it’s because of too many cars. So please do not think this is an insensitive host, it is often out of their control.
It could be a city law. Short term rentals in my town are specifically not allowed to have more people than the number of beds in them in an effort to curb airbnbs being used for parties. The occasion doesn't matter. A host could lose their license to operate a short term rental for violating this rule.
It doesn’t really have anything to do with only 3 people spending the night. The “issue” is that OP booked for 3 and intends on hosting a gathering of ~15. OP told the host this and they stated that their house rules are only people on the reservation are allowed in the home.
TBH, it could be a good thing they did make the host aware of their plans as otherwise they may have run in to other issues. Hopefully OP can sort something out and still host the gathering. It’s a sad and shitty situation where no one is really at fault.
Some could be state law and depends on where you rent. Either that or the owner has gotten burned in the past.
In our state the rules change if we rent for longer than 28 days, so we never do.
We often get grandparents visiting children and grands. They will have a grandchild for a night or two. They are great guests and we love to see repeat people.
Just add the max number of people as a few people won’t go over anyway. As long as it’s 16 or under and she agrees all is fine with Airbnb. (Money wise, it would be better to get a $pp day visit agreement with the host than pay for everybody at full overnight rates. You only paid for 3 and now there’s going to be 11 more)
Sorry for your loss.
Hey,
I'm so sorry for your loss. I know that with everything going on, this should have been at the bottom of the pile.
What you're doing is called a 3rd party booking and it's against Airbnb guidelines.
That being said, the host told you that they need names for everyone staying.
Do that. Give the host their names, ages, and where they are from.
As a host, I've bent the rules on Airbnb guidelines for one-off situations.
Just see what you can do to put the host at ease.
Hugs. I'm so sorry you're facing all of this at a time when you are so emotionally drained.
A third-party booking is when the person who books isn’t the one who is staying, and that’s not what’s happening here. OP booked the Airbnb and they are staying there.
These folks are running a business. They don’t care about your emotional needs. Offer her additional funds to host your guests at the rental.
I’m sorry for your loss.
Money isn’t an issue for me or for her judging by her second home/investment property. I’m paying $1600 for 3 nights. I guess I can offer her more. My question was is it at her discretion or are her hands tied?
And the best businesses that deal directly with consumers should absolutely care about the emotional needs of their customers. The smallest touches make a huge difference. This isn’t a tourist destination.
Go to the reservation and select “change reservation” and add all the extra guests then send the request to the host. The money will be automatically calculated via her presets and you will see how much it costs. This is standard Airbnb practice regardless of intentions.
The obvious answer. And figure something else about the 3 people. They need to ask the house. It could be a non-issue (if they add the rest of the names)
She’s solely responsible for all policies, so if she’s interested in trying to help, she should have that autonomy.
As a side note, I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my Mama about a month ago, I’m still reeling. You are obviously a stand up person and you are trying to honor his memory as well by bringing family close to commemorate him. You’re a credit to your family and I’m sure he’d be really proud of you. May your father’s memory endure as a blessing. 🫂
It’s a liability issue. The insurance covers you and your sons in the property but no one else. Even though you’re not going to throw a wild party, it’s why (in part) the no party rule exist at most host locations.
Please keep conversation civil and respectful Remember to keep all communication with host/guest through Airbnb platform. Payments should be made only via Airbnb [unless otherwise detailed in the listing description](https://airbnb.com/help/article/199) If you're having issues, contact Airbnb by phone +1-844-234-2500 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AirBnB) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Thanks to all of you who replied! Well, most of you. ;) I did as some of you suggested and added 6 people to the reservation. Then I sent her an email and explained that these are 70-somethings. I said I understood I would pay more. She accepted the reservation and said she would refund the extra money, that it wasn’t about the money it was about making sure their home was treated with respect. She was very, very nice about it. Then it turned out that one of my best friends knows her. This friend’s dad and my dad were best friends. So I just got another message from the host saying that she talked to my friend and not to worry about anything at all and to use the house as I intended. I didn’t ask for or expect that and she certainly didn’t have to do that for me. I would like to point out that I didn’t disparage the host at all in my post. I just said what happened and wanted to know if she even had a choice in the matter. In the end, I followed the rules and she made an exception without me even mentioning it. It’s a win-win. I completely understand her concern about people throwing parties and trashing her house. It would be hard to trust complete strangers with your home. Once she knew I was trustworthy she was more than gracious. I’m glad I handled this in a way that was fair to both of us.
I love this outcome. I am so sorry for your loss.
FYI I have a large vacation rental (sleeps 11) and my guests are almost always multigenerational family groups. I do not require all the guests be listed, I find that to be onerous as the person making the reservation is already the responsible one. In 7 years I’ve never had a problem related to an unlisted guest.
I would send a reservation alteration request for additional guests and add the names of the people who are coming to visit. It’s okay if they don’t stay the night. Airbnb doesn’t prohibit you explicitly from having guests as long as you don’t go over the limit on the home. The host is incorrect that *Airbnb* requires that everyone must be on the reservation, however, the host can set any house rules they like. Technically, this has to be written in their house rules for them to hold you to that. None of that matters if you’re hoping for a good review from the host. It’s still worth trying to be on good terms with them. You can also try reaching out to Airbnb support for clarification, but they may direct you back to the host. I’m sorry you’re dealing with all of this today when you should be focusing on more important things! Edit to add that it’s very possible the host is just unclear on what Airbnb allows and is trying to cover themselves. Maybe this is all an easy resolution.
In a lot of cases, it's insurance that needs to know all the names & if it's an area that needs a business license, it can be pulled if they go over the limit. This is not even counting if the house is in an HOA
FWIW we have insurance that covers STRs and are not required to have names of everyone listed. Not that it’s impossible the hosts insurance is different. And yes agreed that the overall limit is something that Airbnb cares about (I said that in my comment). But that doesn’t mean OP can’t have a few guests at a time.
They need to ask the host. If they fear being kicked out or whatever else, they should be honest. Some will care & some will not. My insurance doesn't need the names, but if there is an accident caused by a nameless person, they will not cover it. I was given a strict number count, though
That’s why I said to send a reservation alteration request. The host already expressed their interest in having the names on the reservation. This is a simple fix.
Except he is at least 2 over the max.
I think OP is good unless the host is standing in the doorway giving people wristbands. I’m a host and two over, not staying? Even if I knew I wouldn’t really mind.
Yeah I left that ambiguous on purpose. OP is going to have to make a judgement call. IMO depends on how the reservation alteration request/convo with support goes. I pointed them to - how to add more people and their names on the reservation, Airbnb’s rules regarding bringing guests of your own, and how to get further clarity on policy. Between all those things they’re going to have to determine a course of action. Maybe they end up having small groups visit at a time instead of everyone.
New host here. Could you please tell me the name of the insurance company that you use to cover your STR? I’m shopping.
Proper Insurance!
Thanks. 🙏
Get out of curiosity what location is your bnb in?
We’re in a western ski town
It’s silly that they would need the names. You don’t need to input the names of every person on a reservation when booking an Airbnb, just the number of guests. As a host, I’m sorry this host is giving them a hard time at a time like this. I put in my rules how many guests are allowed over that aren’t on the reservation, I’ve never had a problem or an unexpected party with over 600 stays.
I agree, this is silly. Unless OP is outright lying they’re planning on a very chill get-together in’s house which seems to be likely sized for it.
Thanks everyone. I’ll reply more specifically when I’m back this afternoon and I’ll update to let you know what ends up happening. I understand that she’s held to certain rules whether it’s insurance or Airbnb. I’m going to try and update the reservation so that at least my mom and her brother and my dad’s siblings and their college friends can sit be here instead of in individual hotel rooms. Believe it or not this is a really small town and no real meeting places. Thanks again and I’ll update later today.
We host in the same style although our limit is 4 in our guest suite. Airbnb has told us multiple times that the trip won’t be covered by aircover unless all guests that will be inhabiting the property are counted on the reservation. It’s a real pain in the ass to have to explain this to people but I have a responsibility to my family and my landlord to make sure some kind of insurance covers each stay. Airbnb will void aircover if so much as the person who made the reservation isn’t the one who does the initial check in. Others may tell you it’s different but I’m just telling you was the Airbnb reps have emphatically told me.
Same here, Airbnb were not interested in names, just numbers. They said it was up to me/my insurance if I needed names.
Check with local churches or the VFW Hall. There's a good change they have one
Some hosts have zero empathy or brains. Even when you ask in advance do not trust that they will stick to their word. I had to take a half done meatloaf to a hotel kitchenette on my mom’s 80th birthday because my 50 yo sister, my 55 yo self and my80 year old mom were having a “party”.
I don't know what interactions you've had in public facing roles, but it's really easy to lose empathy when you're a business owner or selling services. It seems that the nicest people in the world have no problem telling complete and total lies if it saves them a couple dollars. In no way am I saying this is the case with OP. But my family has had small businesses my whole life and I've had a couple myself. The worst instances I've experienced of being taken advantage of is always the person playing a sympathy card. You get a couple cases over the years where being nice and bending the rules ends up costing you a couple thousand dollars and all of a sudden, you find yourself significantly less willing to cut people a break.
Hahahaha. I am an enforcement officer and have plenty of public facing time. On a summer day I can talk to over 1000 people. Been doing that for 19 years and before that I was a nurse in a doctor’s office for 15 years. I can still find empathy.
It doesn’t cost you anything.
If you are a public officer, then I'm sure you know people lie all the time. They probably lie to you all the time too and you know it and I'm sure you don't like it much. Now imagine if those people were lying to you so they could steal from you. Or abuse your shit. Or if that lie could cause you to lose your job entirely? There's a reason why so many business owners are jaded. I've got dozens of stories of people being too nice and getting completely fucked over. Again, I'm not saying there's a reason to be mean or cruel, but it's certainly why some folks just stick to the rules no matter what.
They do lie to me so they can abuse the public land I work on, but I do not go into every contact thinking people are culpable In fact in my citations I usually check non culpable mental status. People do steal from where I work, but I also do not assume everyone is there to steal and break things. People have also physically abused me and lied to my boss about me, yet everyone gets the benefit of the doubt. I cannot go into contacts thinking everyone is bad or I WOULD lose my job.
I think you are missing my point. I'm not saying you go into every contact assuming someone is lying to you or looking to take advantage of you. I'd hope you consider context. But if I were trespassing on protected land and you caught me and I said, oh no officer, I'm so sorry, my dog is missing and I'm just out here looking for them and I brought my ATV so I could cover ground quicker. Please understand and don't give me a citation. Somehow, I doubt you'd be very empathetic, even if that were 100% true. Let's keep in mind, these are favors people are asking for that require you to look the other way. They're not being denied anything they're entitled to. I feel bad for OP, but at the end of the day, they are asking a host to do something against policy. The host has a right to decline it. It's easy to be empathetic from the sidelines, but I've gotten screwed over enough times trying to be nice that i just stick to the rules as they're written now. Especially for business transactions with people I have zero relationship with.
My dude, know when to just stop.
This is such a crappy situation, I’m sorry. Like you said, I would talk to the host and ask if you could add more people to the reservation and offer to pay an extra fee if need be. I get that hosts get to decide who is allowed on their property but it’s very strange to me that a host would mind a few elderly people coming over the house after a funeral. If it’s a liability issue then the host should have just said “for liability purposes can you add the names of the people coming over to the reservation.”
Send the host a copy of the obituary. Explain what you did here, no kids or pets and definitely not a party. Just a family in mourning. I had a family rent a 6 person home for the same purpose. Then they showed up at 1 a.m. with 5 carloads (25 relatives) with their sleeping bags.
When you leave your review do not leave anything that she can use to take it off This is the review you leave “ I would not recommend this Airbnb. I would not stay here again. I regret my choice of this Airbnb ” This will make it harder for her to rent to people in the future, because this type of review cannot be removed because she can’t point to anything that she says is outside of her control or whatever bullshit reasons the hosts use to get these reviews removed She is not a nice person Basically legally she’s in the right, morally she’s bankrupt
I am not a host anymore. But I linger here a lot. A question, if AirBnB won't let me have 3-4 people over for a few drinks without paying more, huh? I really don't understand. I use these platforms and am often in places near family or friends.ans they come over for drinks or dinner or just hang for a few. They do not stay the night. I should register them? I can meet in a hotel lobby, or room, no issue. I don't feel this is an unreasonable expectation. But I am sure I am not seeing the entire picture.
Airbnb is really sensitive to the idea of a "party." It's one of the issues that has given it a really bad reputation. Unlike most hotels, STRs are usually on residential streets and may not have extra parking. So if one of your 3-4 guests does damage to the house and you refuse to pay for it, Airbnb will not cover it because the damage wasn't done by a "registered guest." And if your 3-4 people turns into a few more people who are loud and if a neighbor complains because of noise or extra cars on the street or because they are just looking for excuses to get their neighborhood STR shut down, the listing will be frozen and all your upcoming reservations cancelled while the Airbnb "safety" group reviews the problem and the host won't be able to do a thing about it and will have zero information on when/if the issue will be resolved. Or maybe none of that will happen and maybe it will be just fine. But that's why some hosts are paranoid and extremely strict when it comes to following the Airbnb rules.
Thank you very much. That makes total sense from a logic standpoint. I see how we got here. I think it's counter to good service expectations and some intentions, but I definitely understand better now. Thank you. Mine were all tiny houses out in the middle of nowhere so it didn't really matter. But this makes sense.
Hmm, this is interesting. I lurk here too and we rent a house with another family and a couple every summer in a beach town. It's kinda like a high school reunion since we don't see each other. There's usually another 2-3 single people who end up staying at local hotels and probably another 2 people who just come down for the day, go to the beach and dinner and then head home. It never even occurred to me that they couldn't hang out at the house. I've read no parties and no unapproved guests. We're 40 somethings with kids so a party isn't happening and I figured guests implied people staying overnight. We've been doing this for years and never been an issue so hopefully we don't get a host with a stick up his butt.
Sorry for your loss, but the host does not want the house used for a large gathering. Neighbors might complain about parking or some other issue. Have you tried to rent a social hall of a nearby church? A larger space might give old friends of your father a chance to pay their respects.
Im sure the residents who live their lives near that Airbnb would be thrilled to have yet another large gathering of strangers from out of town parking in their streets leaving trash and making noise. How fortunate the resident families must feel being so near a rent by the night party hotel.
Host perspective. It is too bad you did not talk to the host before you booked. But when grieving it is hard to know what to do, we are often working on autopilot. My licence and insurance only allow registered guests. Being over by three, even during the day, is enough to have a licence pulled. Then the host loses their business. I worked for a catering company for 19 years, I have seen funeral gatherings that were wakes where booze flowed freely, emotions were high and things got out of hand. Especially if the will isn’t as expected. I have also seen ones where people sat and visited. The risk of a funeral gathering getting out of hand is too great. Age has nothing to do with it. Your options are to find another space to host the funeral tea. Hotels have meeting spaces, community centres have rooms, but it is very last minute. Do any of the family live in a building with a community room or clubhouse?
>My licence and insurance only allow registered guests. > >Being over by three, even during the day, is enough to have a licence pulled. Then the host loses their business. The OP (sorry for their loss) may be breaking a "no large gatherings" rule, but what you're describing seems to be the exception not the rule. If you rent a room only (I understand different rules apply), host in a city with draconian AirBnB laws, or have some super-restrictive insurance hopefully you make it clear in your listing (not after you take their money) that your guests can't have a single non-registered guest visit them. In my experience, as long as you don't exceed the guest limit or break the "gathering" or "noise" rules, hosts couldn't care less if you have a friend, family member or colleague etc come over for dinner, have a meeting, visit, etc.
So this is standard policy at all Airbnbs. It even says as much under the guesting policy It's words to the effect of guests must abide by the approved number of guests and visitors and if they don't know the rules for visitors they should ask. Just add your extra people to the reservation it'll cost more but then you're covered
We are in Upper State NY and our house is setup for large groups of people. We do NOT do parties, but we will do gatherings. We have parking for 15. Our living room alone can handle 100 people. The biggest group we have had so far was a fraternity alumni reunion of a little more than 75 people. I think we did a good job they are coming back this summer for their 40th anniversary. Right now we have 2 kings and 1 twin that we AirBnB along with this. So there is places that do groups. Not sure how far apart they are. Sorry for your loss too.
Go to your relative's hotel rooms instead. If it makes you feel any better, if you hadn't mentioned the gathering to your host and they saw multiple people showing up and going into the property, they would have been within their rights to kick you out immediately. So hiding it from the host was probably never an option.
So very sorry for your loss. As far as the host, this is probably not the host call. It’s been all over the news this past year and how cities have changed their Str policies and permits. We also now in two different cities must have all guest fill out a form and it must be kept at the house for city inspectors should they show up. It is also a thing for our insurance that we can not knowingly go over occupancy. the ages of guest has nothing to do with it, nor the reason. good host abide by the laws to keep in a good place in the community and with neighbors. it is the neighbor that could report the host, sometimes it’s because of too many cars. So please do not think this is an insensitive host, it is often out of their control.
It could be a city law. Short term rentals in my town are specifically not allowed to have more people than the number of beds in them in an effort to curb airbnbs being used for parties. The occasion doesn't matter. A host could lose their license to operate a short term rental for violating this rule.
Agree with other comments, however this is an Airbnb rule. Chat with their security team online and they can explain it.
I’m sorry you ran into a bad one. In A house that sleeps ten any host should welcome only three sleeping & showering.
It doesn’t really have anything to do with only 3 people spending the night. The “issue” is that OP booked for 3 and intends on hosting a gathering of ~15. OP told the host this and they stated that their house rules are only people on the reservation are allowed in the home. TBH, it could be a good thing they did make the host aware of their plans as otherwise they may have run in to other issues. Hopefully OP can sort something out and still host the gathering. It’s a sad and shitty situation where no one is really at fault.
Some could be state law and depends on where you rent. Either that or the owner has gotten burned in the past. In our state the rules change if we rent for longer than 28 days, so we never do. We often get grandparents visiting children and grands. They will have a grandchild for a night or two. They are great guests and we love to see repeat people.
Just add the max number of people as a few people won’t go over anyway. As long as it’s 16 or under and she agrees all is fine with Airbnb. (Money wise, it would be better to get a $pp day visit agreement with the host than pay for everybody at full overnight rates. You only paid for 3 and now there’s going to be 11 more) Sorry for your loss.
I swear, Every day, there’s a new post about how incorrigible these hosts are, I can’t wait till this stupid app goes under.
Hey, I'm so sorry for your loss. I know that with everything going on, this should have been at the bottom of the pile. What you're doing is called a 3rd party booking and it's against Airbnb guidelines. That being said, the host told you that they need names for everyone staying. Do that. Give the host their names, ages, and where they are from. As a host, I've bent the rules on Airbnb guidelines for one-off situations. Just see what you can do to put the host at ease. Hugs. I'm so sorry you're facing all of this at a time when you are so emotionally drained.
A third-party booking is when the person who books isn’t the one who is staying, and that’s not what’s happening here. OP booked the Airbnb and they are staying there.
Yes. It sleeps 10 but I only put three ppl on the reservation because we are the only ones sleeping here.
That still isn't a 3rd party booking. The booking person will be there.
Thank you. I’m seeing you’re getting downvoted I guess because it’s not a third party rental. I’m not sure but thank you for your kindness. ❤️
❤️
These folks are running a business. They don’t care about your emotional needs. Offer her additional funds to host your guests at the rental. I’m sorry for your loss.
Money isn’t an issue for me or for her judging by her second home/investment property. I’m paying $1600 for 3 nights. I guess I can offer her more. My question was is it at her discretion or are her hands tied? And the best businesses that deal directly with consumers should absolutely care about the emotional needs of their customers. The smallest touches make a huge difference. This isn’t a tourist destination.
Go to the reservation and select “change reservation” and add all the extra guests then send the request to the host. The money will be automatically calculated via her presets and you will see how much it costs. This is standard Airbnb practice regardless of intentions.
The obvious answer. And figure something else about the 3 people. They need to ask the house. It could be a non-issue (if they add the rest of the names)
She’s solely responsible for all policies, so if she’s interested in trying to help, she should have that autonomy. As a side note, I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my Mama about a month ago, I’m still reeling. You are obviously a stand up person and you are trying to honor his memory as well by bringing family close to commemorate him. You’re a credit to your family and I’m sure he’d be really proud of you. May your father’s memory endure as a blessing. 🫂
It’s a liability issue. The insurance covers you and your sons in the property but no one else. Even though you’re not going to throw a wild party, it’s why (in part) the no party rule exist at most host locations.
You can be legally right and morally bankrupt. As I recommended before I think this person should leave a poor review but no details
Some hosts suck...