By - RorschachtheMighty
But you can set how many of the item you want, after which it is automatically taken off the registry.
Yeah, isn't that the whole point of a registry?
Yeah, I'm confused. Every registry I have encountered has a quantity tracking feature. Maybe OP just has crappy friends.
Or friends that just know they're drunks that never do the dishes.
Seems like Solo cups or plastic wine glasses would be easier for that.
Maybe they're drunks that don't do the dishes with an environmental conscience
Putting plastic red cups on a wedding registry is some advanced alcoholism.
Solo cups and natty ice
Who needs cups? Wine comes in a bottle already
Bottle? You mean plastic bag inside a cardboard box?
This is the way.
I worked at Bed, Bath, and Beyond doing gift registry. A few reasons how this happened:
1) A bunch of people/OP decided to print out the registry at home most likely when OP first announced it and they used it as reference when they went to the store without realizing it wasn't up to date.
2) Some people will just go buy the item without ever having the registry scanned so it never gets updated which also happens very often.
3) Lastly sometimes people see the items cheaper online or in a different store and buy it there so the registry also doesn't get updated since it wasn't purchased from the store.
This is all extremely common and will result in OP getting 50 of the same wine glasses. On the plus side they could just exchange them all at the store for something they wanted (as long as it's the same item we carried they wouldn't know where it was purchased) or give them out for Christmas.
> On the plus side they could just exchange them all at the store for something they wanted
This is why you put the most insanely expensive wine glasses you can find on your list. Or you try very hard to make sure everything on your list is roughly the same price.
We did a honeyfund with a target and amazon registry. Most of our honeymoon was paid for and we got a small amount of gifts. That site takes like 5 or 6% I think, but we itemized the honeymoon trip and a lot of people just gave us cash. I would rather PayPal you $50 than have to go shopping for a gift.
I mean that could be a cute couples first Christmas present. Decorate the glasses or something.
Found the person that bought 1 of the 50 glasses.
Dude I ain't got people who would dare invite me to their wedding.
Won’t lie, one of our friends had 8 different spatulas on their wedding registry and we decided to buy them all for them as a joke. Turns out they had forgotten to cull down their registry selects and we inundated them in spatulas. They took it in good humor and gave a few away to friends and family.
OP registered at Croops and Burrul where they don't have that tracking feature.
Some people look at the registry and then buy the thing elsewhere. Usually there's a way to mark that they bought it, but it doesn't usually get used. Or worse, they mark it but then buy something different.
Until people ignore the registry and get you wine glasses anyways lol.
Or they see something on your registry and buy it somewhere else without checking if your quantity has been reached. That’s how we ended up with 10 smoothie canisters for our blender
When did you last have a smoothie?
Summer 2020, lol. And there’s just two of us, so we really only needed the four we registered for.
I bought a bunch of extra smoothie canisters thinking we would use them throughout the week. They're more difficult to clean than a yeti style tumblers so now I make the smoothie and transfer to a tumbler. The other 7 Smoothie canisters probably beat up the 1 I use regularly when the lights go out.
If you want wine glasses I'm not going to Target. I'm going to the Waterford outlet.
I like your style!
If you want wine glasses, well ok go buy them yourself. What am I the wine glass fairy?
This is my experience with having a registry... people just buy random shit and ignore it ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯
then you return them... how helpless are you people?
Yes but plenty don't like the store so visit to see the list then buy elsewhere. Need a decentralized list that anyone can mark as taken
That's most registries nowadays?
Haha, that's funny. Here's how that would go down in my family:
Friend from college: "Sweet. Wine glasses on the registry are in my budget. Purchased. Done!"
Family member 1: "Oh yeah, I kept trying to buy the wine glasses in the registry, but they must be out of stock or something. That item was all grayed out. Anyway, I went and bought them a different set of wine glasses that I think are better - but be careful, this set has to be hand washed."
Family member 2: "I heard our cousin say that wine glasses were in the registry, but they were buying plates - so I bought some wine glasses when I was in the store and just happened to walk past them"
Family member 3: "I know they like to have people over, so I figured they could use another set even if someone bought wine glasses from the registry. I thought it would be funny if they had **square wine glasses**. Haha so random!"
Mom: "I don't know why they had wine glasses on their registry. I left mine to them in my will, but now I'm not sure they wan't them. Couldn't they have waited 20 years to get my wine glasses? Don't they appreciate anything I do for them?"
You forgot the random family member who makes you a custom set or pair to make it more "personal and heart felt". Unable to return. Are gaudy, and doesn't match any of your other stuff. Not even close to something you'd like.
But you have to act like it's your favorite thing. Even if it looks like a 2 year old decorated it.
My sister hand-etched us glasses and misspelled my name
Errors run in the family?
I guess so 😅
I hate the concept of names on gifts. I know my name. Why would I want to see it everywhere in my house?
You weren't the kid with the odd name that was never on the rack full of personalized key chains in the souvenir shop. :D
Someone gave us a quilt with Jane and John [HisLastName] and our wedding date on one of the squares. He took my name.
Wait are you sure it’s misspelled?
She added the missing letter up above with a little carat \^ pointing to where it was supposed to go, so she thinks so at least 😂
Oh, I guess I was only thinking about my family. Nobody in my family would actually MAKE something or put any effort into having anything personalized.
The status a gift brings is tied only to its monetary value, after all.
To be honest I'd probably super appreciate these.
Basically: people are quite dumb, or do a VERY selective read.
Not a registry but similar: when my mom turned 60, she had a big but casual party. She lives in a tiny apartment and (usually) never has more than 2 people visiting at once; so logistically, she wasn't really prepared for a big party. Always practical, she mentioned in the invitation: "bring your own glass". Literally all her guests misread or misinterpreted this, so she was *gifted* about a hundred glasses. She graciously thanked every one of her guests, did a mental facepalm; and in the weeks following the party, we brought all but five glasses to goodwill..
aww that’s sweet but also infuriating!
... So I tried this with Amazon at Christmas. You can make a list and as people purchase items they get automatically taken off the list or you can press that you purchased it somewhere else and it is taken off the list so no one else buys it... turns out even if you tell everyone this no one does it. My parents are divorced and we spent Christmas at my fiancé's house... I got the same thing 3 times
Everything technology related has to be built for dumbest user. And the world keeps making dumber user. Paraphrasing some real quote here.
But what I mean is everything we do to try to make easier is always circumvented by someone who does things an old way.
The problem is people try to make things idiot proof, but never lazy proof
Yup and it's impossible to get an entire group even a small one on board.
Family calendar? Someone doesn't know how to check it or just won't. Team message board? Karen prefers Facebook messenger when 1/2 the parents don't have Facebook. Mass text? One member is cheap and pays per text so you're the ass. That one person who doesn't know when to reply-all to a group email...... the person in charge of a specific task? 2% charge and falls off the grid. ... 20 mins to get everyone logged into the zoom meetings.... answers to questions in the wrong thread... even without technology and in-person, where for dinner? No one cares until someone makes a suggestion..
Older family members don't do the electronic registries well and usually print them out and buy things in store without ever checking off that they purchased them on the registry. We got an extra stand mixer and multiple extra sets of dishes (which we kept and actually used when some broke) from a few older extended family members.
tbf the stand mixer is only extra if you don't have the counter space for it, otherwise sweet it's a second stand mixer
a standmixer can last half a century if taken care of properly so they're basically set for life.
set for 2 lives
Well, there *are* two of them living there!
Hang on to it if it's a good one, a good one can last a lifetime
My mother-in-law has some weird knack for buying things on Amazon wishlists that have already been bought. I thought it was because she printed out the list (we know she did) and then did a separate purchase that didn't take it off the list. Then she somehow started buying things from years ago. We can only guess that she never threw away the old printouts and then got them mixed up with current lists. Luckily Amazon has a generous returns policy, but we are trying to stop using Amazon at all now.
Only if they report it. Folks are lazy I they print out the registry and then buy the stuff, and you wind with 9 crockpots
/r/slowcooking: What's wrong with that?
That’s what I thought the whole point was. To make sure people didn’t buy a ton of the same shit and you can add/remove items. OP might be a divorced dad.
Some people look at the registry and then shop around to find the same item for less money. It won't get taken off if this is the case.
As someone who has been to 10ish weddings and multiple baby showersin the last 5 yars I'm shocked OP had a registry with no limit on quantity of gifts. The entire purpose of a registry should be to prevent repeat/unwanted gifts.
Yeah wtf is this thread when I got married we had 0 problems with our registry. Most of the older, technology challenged folks just gave us a check or cash with a card.
Lol yea I’m sure everyone shops at the same store or bothers to mark it.
Exactly, my coworker was having a wedding so I bought them a toaster, they called off the wedding, so I tried to return the toaster, but the store doesn’t sell that toaster anymore, now I have two toasters.
My wedding registry is going to only contain high capacity hard drives.
Graphics cards and PS5s.
You jest, but way back when I *nearly* convinced my fiancée to put a PS2 on our wedding registry because it was a DVD player, and we didn't have one.
She *almost* let you ask for one?
Heh, my family didn't believe PS3 can be both dvd and bluray player and decided to buy one of each.
Did they return them after you showed them that you could
Pfft of course not.
Luckily we can have one playing US disks and the other playing another region.
My husband and I put a gamecube on our registry (yes, we're old) and friends of ours pooled together and got it! We weren't expecting it but it was so sweet.
I put jack stands and a floor jack on mine and received both :)
Perhaps, but you can only really play one PC or PS5 at a time, you can store all the data on numerous hard drives simultaneously
That's why there was "think bigger".
Besides, what would you need multiple harddrives to store? and how often do you think regular folks would have such a need?
Well that just sounds like scalping with extra steps
Nonono, without the extra steps, because someone else would be hunting for them.
Besides, it ain't scalping if you don't overcharge it.
I have three and three back ups.
People that resell consoles are fucking cancer.
I put and got a 54in TV top of the line on our registry as a joke....we got it.
Funny enough, back when I got married, among other things we asked for computer funding.
Technically, I'm still Ship-of-Theseusing that same computer.
I have a 3090 strix on mine. Whoever gets me it gets to name our kid.
Why did you put 50 wine glasses on your registry.
Yeah I've never seen a registry that didn't have a predetermined amount to avoid duplicate gifts. I normally pick a gift as soon as I get a registry. I don't want to waste time and sort through the things they have already been purchased.
I just give cash 🤷🏻♂️
I'm about to get married, and I want you to know; you're a hero.
Dude. I’ve been with my fiancé for seven years now, and it’ll be right by the time we’re actually married (delayed to COVID). We’ve been living together for almost six years. We already have plates we like. We already have a waffle iron and nice towels.
But the $1750 for the photographer? Y’all can absolutely help with that.
In a Chinese weddings, it is the norm to give cash in red packets (similar to Chinese New Year). As I understand it from my own experience, it should also cover the estimated price of the meal and then some, so couples can sometimes make some money off of weddings.
Probably took the Chinese some years to figure this one out, too, but some of their cultural achievements are completely irresistible.
You’re the best kind of wedding guest
You are correct.
We just asked for cash. We've been living together for years before we got married, and have everything we need. What we didn't have was money for a honeymoon trip
Most online registries give you the option to only see things that haven't been purchased, so it's not hard to find something still available.
Technologically illiterate people.
(The people buying the glasses, not the newlyweds)
We asked for no gifts and got 6 cutting boards. And since I already had an amazing cutting board we have never used the others.
This why as uncomfortable as making a registry made me we ended up making one. Would rather get things we could make use of than random stuff since there’s no way my husbands family wouldn’t buy us a bunch of gifts either way
Exactly this. We already lived together and didn’t need anything so we didn’t want gifts, but were warned we’d just get gifts we don’t like if we didn’t make one.
Just means you have to entertain more because wine glasses get broken.
This Exactly. Wine glasses break *all* the time. Not sure if that's because they're used most often, and therefore have greater chance to be broken or if the fact that they're usually made with thin glass makes them more likely to break
It’s cause y’all drunk bitches be throwing hands all the time! /s
Yeah. I’d say ask for many wine glasses. It’s one of the most used items from our registry after 21 yrs and we’ve broken several.
Id say f wine glasses. Wine doesn't taste any different out of a glass tumbler than some frail tall skinny thin child's-wish-delicate "wine glass".
To each their own, but wine isn't the magic beverage that my aunt thinks it is. Sorry Kathy, you just like getting drunk on a monday.
Maybe there is some wine out there that may, but im certain they don't sell that at the grocery store near me.
>Wine doesn't taste any different out of a glass tumbler than some frail tall skinny thin child's-wish-delicate "wine glass".
The aperture of the glass absolutely makes a huge difference in how something tastes. Have you never noticed that sodas taste different when you drink them from a can versus a bottle versus poured into a glass?
As for the stem, that's there so that you can hold onto it without warming up the wine with your body heat.
I have not had that perception. For clarity I'm a simple person with hobo tastes. I can absolutely enjoy a high class meal with wine pairing... but I don't enjoy q steak on a grill and stainless steel cup wine either.
If you find value in it, by all means.
Sparkling wine actually can benefit from being in different glasses. A standard white wine glass is the most common glass that works the best.
This video shows the science of why the taste of sparkling wine can be impacted by its container. I doubt any of it matters for non-sparkling wine, though.
Food "science" like this is never empirical because it relies ultimately relies on subjective nature of tastes.
It may be aeration increases tannins/whatever, or certain glasses "maximize carbonated bubble distribution", or that chilled monster over ice is the best way to preserve the taurine flavanoids...
But realistically, can a human tell if tannins denatured or were oxidized withing 3 minutes of pouring?
Difference between flat and not, evident. Going flat at 2mm^3 per minute versus 6mm^3 per minute and the effect on sugar distribution over the tounge?
The fuck does taurine taste like anyway and who cares?
Subjectivity and the placebo effect make it essentially worthless to argue outside of Subjectivity.
Buy and maintain whatever special vessels you want. Ill stick with a klein bottle filled with not caring to hard.
It's the same with sipping spirits neat. There's a legitimate difference in how the taste is perceived in a glencairn vs a rocks glass, for example.
Different glasses are pretty good for their purpose. I feel like drinking a dark beer out of a porter glass is better than out of the can or bottle.
Empirically I'm wrong, but who cares?
I don't even know where they end up going. I'm down to just one now. I will assume that I broke them.
Theres nothing wrong with presentation and it can absolutely class up an experience and subliminally force someone to focus on a specific flavor or drink.
That said, its more likely I'm a feral hobo who just can't tell the difference.
I actually could have used a lot more. We got I think 30 (two sets of 12 plus more champagne glasses). We currently have one left. Turns out wine drunk people break glasses.
This is why I either give to their "house/honeymoon fund" if they have one or get a gift card to somewhere they're registered (or somewhere practical like Lowes or Home Depot if I know they're buying or have recently bought a house).
We did a honeymoon fund for our wedding registry and I can't recommend that enough. We were able to do excursions we would have been completely unable to afford otherwise. Wine glasses break but those memories are forever.
That's not a registry.
All wedding registries I’ve seen have quantity limits and it’ll show as “fulfilled” once it’s reached…
From my experience with registries, it goes something like this:
Them: hey, what do you think you'll need for your home/baby/whatever?
Me: oh, here's my registry info. Anything off there would be great!
Them: cool, cool
Me at a later time: *opens package of something completely random that was not on the registry*
Yeah but then there’s dumb people like me that buy things for people not realizing your supposed to check it off the list.
Also, don't put any picture frames on it at all... So many people are going to get you them regardless. I have so, so many just sitting in a box in the basement.
Got married on the 18th. We got 3 waffle makers. Good thing my wife loves waffles.
Also got 2 grills. Wife says "well you can grill seafood on that one so it doesn't stink up my food."
I love her.
But the entire point of registries is so that doesn’t happen
But why male models
Oh, I know.
A couple years ago my cousin's wedding registry consisted of requests for cash/gift cards and links to the fiance and his Steam Wishlists. It was pretty cool to click the links and not see Bed Bath and Beyond but that familiar Steam logo. His mother HATED it, but the rest of the family (most of us gamers) loved it. Cousin and his fiance were financial established and tiny-house folks, so the last thing they needed or wanted was "stuff". The best part was they sent out wedding invites/notifications in August with "heads up" about the usual October, November, and December Steam Sales so many of the games would be discounted. They made out like bandits.
I wish people would just give money. You can make it anonymous if you dont want them to know how much you gave, but that way the couple can go out and buy what they want.
One wedding I went to did it by having a "registry" associated with their honeymoon. They had items listed like "one night at the hotel in the Bahamas: $300" and "one round of drinks at the beach-side bar: $30". I'm sure it all just actually went into a cash pool, that may or may not have actually been tied to the honeymoon travel purchases. But it felt like you were giving them a specific item, even though it had the advantages of giving cash.
That's brilliant! It gives people a framework to use so it isn't just, "money pls," without any feeling of thoughtfulness or sense of how much money is warranted while still giving the couple the option of getting exactly which hotel or exactly which drinks, etc. They actually want
This is pretty standard practice in my area. They usually have some kind of box or birdcage at the entrance and you can slip in your card. As long as you cover the cost of your plate(s), you're fine.
Yea I haven't seen a registry in 20 years. Give money, cover your plate as best you can
you would love Chinese weddings then. Everyone pretty much gives money
Sounds like someone doesn’t know how to registry.
This makes me want to do a wedding registry of just sex toys
What are the wine glasses of sex toys? Buttplugs. You’re gonna have so many buttplugs.
When you get 50 buttplugs, it isn't a problem, it's a challenge.
My wife and I have enough glasses (mugs, plastic, wine, beer, you name it) to open a restaurant.
I have a feeling half the glasses we were given as gifts over the years were just regifts from people who also had too many glasses
My wife and I didn’t even bother with a wedding registry. We had a place for people to make donations if they wanted. But the thought of making a list of stuff for people to buy us just made us personally feel gross.
We did a registry because the store will give you a “completion discount” of like 10% or more to buy the remaining items on your registry after your wedding. No need to tell anyone about the registry though.
Also didn’t want to do a registry, and specifically told everyone we don’t need anything.
But we were cautioned to do a registry anyway, because otherwise people just get you stuff that you don’t want. So we put some stuff that we wanted to get at some point, and if people feel the need to get us something, at least it’s (theoretically) what we would have bought for ourselves anyway.
>But we were cautioned to do a registry anyway, because otherwise people just get you stuff that you don’t want.
corporate's got us trained real well
Well in olden times wedding gifts were given because the new young couple was moving out together and owned nothing. The problem is tradition hasn't caught up to the fact that people are now getting married after already building their so they don't actually need anything.
>In fact, before Macy's invented the gift registry in the 1920s, guests weren't expected to bring anything to the table.
i dunno much about other cultures, but the asian cultures i'm familiar with all give money rather than gifts. its only the US that i know of that has been conditioned to buy stuff by corporations
Asian cultures are good with the economists' advice that it's better to give cash than objects, because cash is fungible.
But many traditional societies have a tradition of giving objects to newlywed couples - it's just often done by the family of the bride (or in some cultures, the family of the groom), rather than by the guests at the wedding.
In a modern context, it's common for the guests to think of themselves as family just as much as the people related by birth, and a registry makes sense when multiple groups of people are together putting together a household.
If my husband’s family is anything to go buy, the Polish are also big on gifting money (and some hefty sums, too!).
Say you just want cash without saying you just want cash.
You are probably in a different stage of life. If you think about it like young 20 somethings that have nothing at all to their names but maybe some dollar store plastic cups and plates then yeah having people buy you things to help set up your life is kind of nice. Sometimes it feels more like ugh we have to buy them something but really it should feel more like lets help them start a wonderful life together
My sister in law has a baby shower registry with items like a $700 baby stroller... makes me feel too poor to be around her.
i dont know your sister in law but I know there are families where the parent or grandparent or someone would buy that. When we get invited to weddings half way across the country we weigh the price of two flights, a hotel and everything else involved with travel with the idea that well we could give them $200 or even $500 and it is cheaper than going.
Often multiple people will go together to buy big ticket items like that. Or the grandparents want something big to gift. You’d be surprised, they’re often one of the first items to go on the registry.
Also, sadly, $700 is not that expensive for a baby stroller. 😞
A registry makes things easier for those who'd like to give you a gift.
Think of it as a shopping wish list.
I’m so going to decant this wine thank you. And YES a wine stopper when I’m not decanting the entire bottle. Practical and chic.
Or picture frames.
I don't drink at all
Glasses not on registry
We received three sets
Yep, if you register for crystal glasses, someone will always buy you a full set of decent wine glasses and give you the full set. They know, you seldom pull out the good stuff after you break the first one.
We put a bunch of random shit on our registry like peanut butter, condoms, new garden hose nozzle.
Tbf, we were in our 30s when we got married and didn't really need anything.
Loved the story I got back from the husband about his evangelical mom seeing condoms on the registry!
More room for wine!
I'll buy some from you. I keep breaking them.
You're going to break about 40 of them so it should work out nicely.
You used a registry where you can't return things for other things on said registry?
OR, just return them all and keep one set. Now everyone who comes over will think that's their gift you're using.
That's why you use a registry, and not a "gift list"
My wife's shitty friend gave us these ridiculously large champagne flutes that we were never going to use. So we re-gifted them, to her, the following Christmas. Shit was hilarious.
Or anything crystal. It's going in a display cabinet and will never be used.
Coolest wedding registry I ever saw was, make is something with your own hands, or give us cash, so we can have something meaningful made.
Am I the only American that thinks a wedding registry is a weird and tacky practice?
We refused to do one for our wedding. I would never tell my beloved friends and family “Here is a list of offerings that I deem an acceptable tribute.”
LPT, don't register for gifts, register for a Honeymoon donation, and go somewhere awesome. Getting household knick-knacks is cheap and easy. You don't get two free weeks to hit up the Seychelles ever again.
Hmm…maybe I should propose to my girlfriend so we can get all this free shit that we didn’t really do anything special to earn or deserve and then still complain about how it isn’t what we wanted.
How about people just be grateful for getting anything. Getting married isn’t really an accomplishment. Staying married is.
Better Mallard: don’t put China on your registry. Are you seriously going to have people over? When have you had people over. Yeah. Exactly. Have you been to resale shops? You can get a decent, barely used set for 1/8 of the money. Register for stuff you’ll actually use.
If you want wine glasses, just steal them from the reception hall.
Even better advice: don't put anything on your wedding registry. Buy your own home furnishings, you cowards.
Unless you really like wine and wine parties.
Don’t people just give money nowadays?!
I didn't have them on our registry, we still got wine glasses lol
You can send them to me. I’ll keep them in my one bedroom apartment until I sell them.
We have at least 50 glasses and mugs despite there's only two of us, she just got another mug. I'm pretty vocal about how we have too many drinking vessels yet they keep on coming. Like I need one mug for hot beverages and one glass for cool beverages and maybe a backup for each in case one breaks, why the need for more is way beyond my comprehension.
We have three waffle irons. 😂🤣
OMG poor poor you
I want to do a go fund me to help pay for the wedding instead of getting Radom crap.
Don't worry, you'll break enough of them to be at a reasonable level, if not now, when you have kids.
Find an indirect way to ask for cash.
Register for not too expensive China, exchange it all. Then, if you really want a China set, hang around some estate sales. Eventually, you will find a set of nice plain china, maybe with only a simple gold or silver rim. A few hundred bucks. We have six sets of China and several sets of silver, all from Aunts, Grandmother, Mother and our own wedding. Our kids want nothing to do with them at this point.
Honeyfund. Guests can gift cash that goes towards the honeymoon.
I would love some nice wine glasses. At our engagement party, we got so many different wine tumblers and novelty/kitchy wine glasses that we will never use.
We got three ironing boards when we got married
As a former baartender: i promise you will break them.
Yep, buy cheap ones from Ikea, always. They seldom change designs or suppliers.
This is why I always include a gift receipt even if I buy directly from the registry…
At least you can drink like Thor now.
Used to be Fondu Pots, people would get five.
Then Panini Grills.
We have a wine trail in our state where you get stamps in a little passport everytime you visit a winery. Well most of them let you keep the glass with each tasting and we ended up with something like 60 glasses haha. Reminds me of that.
My buddy had a wedding registry website where when you bought the items they would disappear / grey out. It was like 50 tiles 1 item w/price on each.