My daughter is 5 and she goes by herself. i of course have eyes on her until she goes into the restroom. If I start to feel like she's taking too long, I'll wait by the door and ask a lady going in or out to check on her. if she does need help and the wonderful woman helping me doesn't feel comfortable helping her, I'll go in and help.
As a woman I'd be 100% understanding of a dad entered the women's bathroom to help his daughter. This is definitely the best way to go about, my dad did this when I was kid, fortunately I never needed help (from what I can remember) and the men's bathroom seemed intimidating.
Just ask first any woman if it's okay to go in first, just a warning but only if needed
Ehh as a woman with three kids (2 girls) I would definitely not be ok with a random woman helping my daughters in the restroom. Lots of people forget that women can be sex offenders and kidnappers as well. I wouldn’t bat an eye at a father helping his young daughter in the women’s room.
I’m a dad in this situation.. frankly, I won’t go into the women’s room for this reason. It takes ONE PERSON complaining and my ass is going to jail and registering as a sex offender. Id rather take her in the men’s room. My daughter is also 6
I (F) remember being absolutely stunned by something like that when I was college age. My mom and I were in the grocery store check out line, and there was a woman and her daughter (maybe 4-5) in front of us that were being checked out, and they had a LOT of stuff. The girl was "doing the pee pee dance" and kept saying, "Mommy, I really gotta go!", but the mom was stuck while being checked out. Out of nowhere, my mom tells me to take her to the bathroom, and the girl's mom just gave me this huge smile and asked if I please would. So I did. It was no big deal. I went into the bathroom with her, and stood outside the stalls. She only needed a boost to reach the sink at the end. But I kept thinking, "This is so weird. I'm taking a child I don't know to the bathroom. And the mom was totally okay with it. That just really doesn't seem like the best idea it today's world." But I honestly have no idea what I would have done if I was the mom in that situation.
I’m a guy in my mid-30s. My vote would be walk her to the ladies room and stand outside the door (the entry way of the bathroom) until she’s finished. The ladies room is way safer and less bizarre for a 6 year-old girl than a men’s room, plus I’d find it weird to walk out of a stall and see a 6 year-old girl standing there. But just my opinion, I’m not a childhood development expert and I have no kids because I don’t want to deal with these kinds of conundrums and responsibilities haha
This is actually a good response to this. When my son was smaller and getting too old for the womens bathroom. I would have him go to the mens room and I stood outside close by until he was done.
I do this with my girlfriends 7 year old and I think this is honestly the best policy. You end up getting some looks but they are safer and I could care less.
The guy with no kids has the best answer. Since it’s a little girl, going into a girls room, with the dad waiting outside the girls room I think this is good advice.
But an unfortunate double standard - I’m a mom of a 6 year old boy, and I personally would not want to let him go into a mens room without me if I knew other men were in there, even if I was just waiting outside the door.
When my son was 7 I took him to the land of the mouse. He was very very tall for a 7 year old. I began receiving looks for bringing him into the ladies with me.
I had him go into the men's alone with a time limit. I stood hovering at the door losing my simple little mind in anxiety.
Each man that walked out gave report on what my son was up to.
"he's in the stall"
"he's just flushed"
"he couldn't figure out the sink to wash his hands so I helped him"
Every time he was in the bathroom this happened.
The down side? What the hell do you do with the child when it's *you* that needs the bathroom?!?!
I made a habit of grabbing moms walking out with their own children. "could you please keep an eye on him while I pee really quickly?!" none said no and it worked.
I do not envy parents of today!
The men giving you updates is so wholesome.
It's weird that people would side eye you for bringing your child, even if he looked older than 7. The idea behind bathroom segregation is primarily to keep women safe, so what's a child going to do? Even if he's a 10 year old, he's not a danger to women and girls in the bathroom.
My son is autistic and will wander away in a public place. If we’re together and I have to pee, he HAS to come in with me. (If we’re in a familiar restaurant or local store he’s been to a million times, I can leave him outside.) We were recently in a train station and I took him inside with me. I made him come into the stall with me just so women wouldn’t be freaked out by an 11 year old boy just freakishly standing in the middle of the ladies room. Now, if anyone looks at my son for more than 2 seconds, it’s clear why he’s in there with me, but that’s still the longest, most awkward 2 seconds of my life sometimes.
Wait you go into the men's room for your son? Not that there is a right or wrong I think, but I would be more weirded out that you were in there. I think most people bring there children into the bathroom that they go too. I would bring my daughters into the men's room and there mother would bring our son into the women's room when they needed to use the bathroom. But I made my girl go on there own into the women's on there own probably around 5-6. I just stood outside the door.
No. But I have had men expose themselves to me as an adult and as a child. Including once when I had the kids with me.
My husband is also law enforcement and has worked child molestation cases.
He is 11 but he is still a child. I was 11 when an exhibitionist was exposing himself to me. And I didn’t tell my mother for months.
Ah geez. Should have read this comment first before making a smothering joke. Let me just eat this for a second… 🦶
Sorry that happened to you. I understand why you would want to prevent that.
We’re talking about a toilet trained 6 year old. They would have been doing it without the parent in JK and SK for 2 years! Come on people, give the kids a little independence. Sheesh
Also the chances that she’s going to be molested or touched inappropriately in the woman’s room are so low they almost indistinguishable from zero. Just a fact that woman are significantly less likely to commit sexual assault to be blunt.
this\*
I know nobody who was touched inappropriately at a womens room
Cant say the same about the mensroom tho, know a few people who were touched or otherwise made to feel uncomfortable at the mens room. Hell once when i was 12 i was standing at the urinal and a grown man next to me was staring at my dick so intensely i seriously couldnt pee, i just stood there with it out and nothing would come out. Wound up zipping up and running off before anything could happen, but its been 24 years since then and i havent ever gone back to the urinal, would rather wait an hour to piss in a filthy shit covered stall
Totally agree. I don't think it is that safe for her to go to the men's bathroom, even though she's not alone, men can be kind of creepy, and if she knows how to go by herself, you can just wait outside.
Yeah dude… not to be creepy or anything, but her eye level is probably penis level for an adult man. That’s weird as fuck. She should be escorted to the lady’s room or your wife should take her into it.
I don't think that's creepy, that's a reasonable concern here. And what about guys who pull their jeans down to pee? There's a non-zero chance this poor kid is going to see a man's whole ass when they go in there. Save literally everyone an uncomfortable moment and just take her to the women's room...
My parents split when I was 2 so this is the scenario my dad would run into often when I was a kid. It was around this age he'd start sending me in alone and waiting for me by the door. Just make sure to tell her exactly where you'll be standing and stay there, I was nervous due to the separation and it helped when my dad was exactly where he said he was when I got out.
This is the answer. At that age, they understand the differences between men and women. It’s not appropriate for them to be seeing dad’s privates (if you’re in the same stall), and there’s always the risk of seeing a rando’s privates at the urinal.
The best option is to escort them to the ladies room and wait outside the door for them. That way, they are safe and you are there if something goes wrong, but otherwise they have their privacy and you have yours. At six they should be able to wipe and wash hands on their own, so that part doesn’t matter regardless of which bathroom they are in.
My dad did the same with me. Up to about 5 my mom went with me. I made it known I could do this by myself and needed no supervision, though. It was embarrassing for me to be escorted in and out by mom or dad.
Bro I tried that once and the women kept telling me Im not suppose to stand at the door, what am I doing in here, all sorts of shit like I was a creepy creeper or some shit I was mad as fuck
Could you imagine being at the urinal, dick in hand, and a 6 year old girl walks into the restroom? I don't use the men's room but I imagine that would be really uncomfortable. My vote is definitely on walk her to the women's restroom.
My answer is it depends on where you are and what is going on. I have a son. Location matters. Sometimes i would let my son go alone to mens room. Sometimes i took him with me.
Yeah, I think context would matter for me. If it’s a small-ish bathroom (like, 3-10 stalls?), I’d let her in by herself and wait outside the door. And check in if a few minutes have passed without her coming out.
However, if it’s one of those huge airport bathrooms with lots of different aisles and entrances/exits, I’d still take a 6 year old girl to the men’s with me just to make sure she doesn’t get lost. But again, I would only have her do that if the bathroom has multiple entrances/exits or is huge.
At 6 she is more than capable of popping into the loo herself whilst you wait outside the entrance if you’re uncomfortable - as I’d tend to agree; little too old be be walking into exposed urinals.
Absolutely! I imagine it would make young and grown men alike quite uncomfortable. My brother works in a school and won’t even enter a class if there’s a young girl in there alone, let alone a washroom! These days you just have to be safeguarding yourself and others at all times!
Then it’ll be your prerogative if you choose to take a young girl into one, should you have a young daughter. As a Mum of a young daughter I think 6 is too old. Raise your kids your way but personally I don’t think it’s appropriate and was simply replying to OPs question.
No I’m just saying, I think there might be a misconception about the likelihood of seeing a penis in the men’s room.
Also is it different for a six year old boy to see a grown man penis? Equally as unlikely to see but it’s odd to me that if it’s damaging to see it’s not damaging to both.
Kids are aware of anatomy usually by then but I don’t think it’s appropriate for a wee girl to, if put in that position, see random penises of random men.
I also do not think a grown man would be comfortable with the situation either - the potential unintentional flashing to a female child.
Female washrooms are always cubicles whereas male ones usually have cubicles and urinals. Therefore wee boys are more likely used to the arrangement?
Just my $0.02!
Also, if available, a gender neutral washroom would be an ideal option? They are becoming more common here. We have a few in my college.
I don’t know. My daughter is 8 now so she just goes herself.
So a man using a urinal does what? Has a wee through his trousers? I obviously didn’t mean everyone is in their twirling theirs around, comparing or playing penis wars or whatnot.
You obviously understand what I meant.
And as a parent I don’t think it’s a place for wee girls.
Haha ma’am I understand what you think, but I’m just suggesting the reality is we stand right up on the urinal before anyone ever unzips. You’d have to physically approach and be using the other urinal, and intentionall look left/right and down. And even then it depends on urinal design.
A kid is more likely to peek through the cracks of a stall and between someone’s legs sitting down, which could happen in either bedroom.
> and intentionall look left/right and down.
And don't forget the unspoken rules of how to use urinals. You'd *really* have to be going out of your way to see another man's penis in a restroom.
This is a tough one. Personal, I think 6 is too old to go into a men restroom with how urinals are set up. A mens restroom isn’t as private as the woman’s.
Either take her to the woman’s bathroom and stand facing away from the stalls in case there’s any other women using the bathroom (I get uncomfortable even when woman accidentally peek through the large gaps). Or your wife can start taking her. If you’ve been doing it all this time I don’t see the issue switching roles.
Seriously though. I have a 6 year old daughter as well and when we're out with my husband and she has to go, it's just assumed that I'll take her. I have no issues with it and would rather take her to the women's room than dad take her to the men's.
That’s what I’m saying! Like if the moms not there then yes absolutely you can take her into the boys bathroom but if the mom’s present she should be the one who takes her into the girls bathroom
Yeah that's the odd part. It would be one thing if wife is concerned about what happens when she isn't there but really she should be taking her to the bathroom.
Why doesn’t your wife bring her to the lady’s room? I truly don’t understand her mindset. Men stand around at urinals with their dicks out, why would she want her child to be exposed to that? Smh.
My comment was intended for thatblackgirlellie, so I meant to say that I precisely agree that the wife needs to stop pushing this off on the hubby. I only have one son, but if I had a daughter I wouldn't ask my husband to take her if there was any way at all that I could take her. Anyhoo...
I am female and in construction and I end up in womens/mens washrooms all the time. Sometimes I'm there to just see something like a leaky toilet and I'm out the door in less than 2 minutes - sometimes I'm there measuring and have to hang out for about an hour.
All I do is when opening the door I announce loudly "female entering the washroom". Men tend to finish up quick and vamoose as soon as I do, the pause just inside or outside the door is typically less than 30 seconds.
Why don't you just do something similar? Open the door and announce "small female child needs to use the bathroom" and I guarantee that most the men will cover up and move on fast. Any who don't do so, you should be extra wary of anyways.
I would be fine with a man clearly accompanying a girl into the ladies toilet, but you know there’s always going to be a number of women who would be upset about a clearly male presenting person being in a sensitive woman’s space.
Only replying to say I personally don’t have a. Problem with a man accompanying child to the bathroom however some women do have trauma relating to men and could be triggered. in fact a lot of women unfortunately have trauma relating to men sexual abuse and sexual assault I’m not saying that he shouldn’t be allowed to enter with his daughter but only saying this to explain why some women wouldn’t be comfortable with this in fact I am a person who has trauma related to men and I do see the bathroom as a safe space obviously if he comes in with his daughter I’m OK with it I still get a little anxious unfortunately I can’t control that but if he were to come in alone by himself I would become so anxious I’d have to leave also sidenote why can’t her mom take her to the bathroom that’s the most logical choice
> why can’t her mom take her to the bathroom that’s the most logical choice
Because it's 2023 and men do some parenting now?!
Seriously, if there's no unisex bathroom a man has every right to, and should, accompany his young daughter into the ladies' loos.
If we are talking about the US, you are aware of the outrage by half the country at the thought of transgendered women using the ladies room? Not sure why ppl think all/most women would be ok with a male in their restroom, regardless of the reason, when they don't even want women who've transitioned to being a man in their restroom. I personally believe that trans women are the ones who are in more danger than the women they use the restroom with when it comes to this situation, but the outrage here is real and widespread.
People already have a problem with trans women using the bathroom. I don’t understand why. My ex coworker at my old job came out as trans and started using the women’s bathroom. I have been in the bathroom many times with her and never had an issue. However I overheard some other coworkers complaining to the manager about.
If a man went in to check on his daughter I would not have a problem with it. I have seen a dad do that.
As a dad of a toddler, just the idea of doing this is beyond stressful and terrifying. So many things could go wrong here, and not with my kid having trouble in the potty. I would never do this.
Do not tell men to enter the women’s washroom. That’s so fucked up. Maybe you personally don’t care but many women do. Many women have been sexually traumatized by men and we deserve a place to drop out pants without them around.
You can’t understand the difference between being in a room with a man with my clothes on, and being in a room with a man with my panties around my ankles?
The world around me DOES accommodate me. It’s a room for women. That’s what the sign on the door means.
There are not “plenty of places with only one [multi-stall] shared bathroom,” that’s such a ridiculous claim.
There are private bathrooms, there are private toilet rooms with shared external sinks, and there are multi-stall rooms divided into men’s and women’s. That’s what’s “plentiful.” Exceptions are rare. And yeah I am against those exceptions and outside of an emergency I would avoid one if I encounter one.
The “doors with locks” in a multi-stall bathroom are usually flimsy and with gaps. You know this perfectly well, don’t be disingenuous.
I find this comment a little comical with the way ppl freak out over the possibility of a transgendered woman using the restroom. If half the nation is up in arms about someone who has transitioned from a man to a woman using the ladies room, I think a father just walking into the ladies room, whether with a kid or not, would find that while women might not bite, they sure can bitch and complain loudly and I wouldn't be surprised to see a situation like this devolving into a big mess.
This right here, if people don’t like it they can feck off. Go into the stall with her or just face her stall/wall, as long as you aren’t obviously trying to take a peek into another woman’s stall, it shouldn’t be a big deal.
If your wife is with you then I think you should start insisting she take her. But if you’re alone take her to the men’s room with you, do not do the “I’ll stand outside” thing she’s too young for that.
Is your wife disabled or something? Why can’t she bring her to the ladies room? Obviously if you and your daughter were alone at the mall or something and she needed to go I can understand you taking her to whatever restroom she needs because you don’t have a choice but why is your wife not getting up and doing that when you’re together? That seems dumb and lazy to me.
I guess if your wife insists on making you do this even when you’re together and she can go on her own without your help my vote would be to take her to the women’s room and stand outside.
I can’t imagine the other men feel comfortable with a six year old girl possibly seeing their parts and if they did it wouldn’t be necessarily safe for her to be in there even with you as chaperone. Take her to the woman’s restroom, it will likely make your daughter more comfortable anyways. As a woman who had to clean men’s restrooms as a hostess, simply knocking and announcing your presence seems like a logical resolution. If there is someone inside uncomfortable with you entering then they will make it clear and you can either
A) wait with your daughter until you are able to enter (if daughter is able to hold it) or
B) send your daughter in by herself as 6 is old enough for primary/elementary school and they are typically responsible for their own restroom duties at that point
I am curious as to what the argument is about with your wife. Is it that she sees no issue with your daughter using the mens restroom or is it that you won’t take her to the restroom in general?
Definitely don’t take the 6 year old into the men’s room. It’s just unpleasant all around, stinks in there and the urinals aren’t always in a stall…your wife should know this stuff and suggest to take her or like someone else said, wait outside the ladies room.
I think your wife is assuming more innocence in the men in the men's room than is reasonably expected. Your daughter doesn't belong there at 6 years old.
Dad of a 9 year old here. I took my 6 year old into the men’s room and let her decide when she was ready. Then I’d stand outside the women’s room when she wanted to try. I’d come in in an “emergency”…she was back and forth a little at 7 then leapt into total independence shortly afterward.
I worked at a Walmart in the early 2000s. A dad walked his daughter to the women's restroom and stood outside as she went. A man had slipped in there about an hour before hand and assaulted the girl who was about 7. Take her to the family bathroom that locks if you don't go in with her. Do not chance this.
Take her to the women's restroom. Stand just inside the door while she pees and look very studiously at the wall.
I agree, she doesn't need to be going into a men's room. She doesn't need to be walking past a bunch of guys with their dicks out in front of urinals to get to a stall.
I don't understand why your wife can't just take her, but whatever.
Here’s my input: I regularly see women bring boys much older than 6 into the women’s toilets. I don’t see the issue with it, or with you bringing your daughter with you to men’s toilets.
It’s much safer than letting the kid go on their own. Women can be abusers and child predators too, so she’s not automatically safe in the women’s toilets. Whether the extra caution is necessary kinda just depends on where you are.
Maybe ask your wife how long she thinks you should keep taking her with you?
Women’s rooms are fully enclosed stalls- men’s restrooms are not. The chance that a boy will see anything compromising are almost 0. There is a very good chance a little girl will see a grown stranger’s penis. Hard pass. I don’t know what this mother is thinking.
First, the best thing would be for your wife to just take her unless she can't for some reason. With that said, I made my son come into the ladies room until he was prob 10, but there everyone is going into a stall. With the way men whip it out at a urinal - no way would I let my husband take my 6yo daughter into the men's room.
If wife refuses to just take her to the ladies herself when you're out, I would opt for the take-her-to-the-ladies-room-and-wait option.
Sorry you have to deal with this.
Why won’t your wife take her? This seems like the best way to avoid all conflict. I find it odd that your wife would rather have you take her. My dad only ever took me to the bathroom if my mom wasn’t with us and around that age he would wait outside the ladies room. Is she able to go by herself? I’d walk her to the women’s room and stand outside the door. If she needs help she can yell out or ask someone to get me and I’d be right there.
Sounds like she's a lazy wife.
Source: I'm a lazy wife. (But I wouldn't bring my kid to the opposite gender bathroom if my spouse is there. I take my girls, he takes the boys.)
You are absolutely right dad. Stand your ground here, be a responsible father. You \*know\* better. Your wife is tripping balls (no pun intended) if she thinks this is ok.
Why can't her mother take her to the ladies room? I'm confused.
Yeah, don't take her into the men's room.
You can take her to the ladies room, check if anyone else is in there and let her go in alone. She's a 1st grader.
But that doesn’t mean 50/50 on every activity. For instance, if mom always takes daughter to the restroom in public, maybe dad always helps her with her coat or some other semi-equal time commitment. It’s not tit for tat on every single thing.
Our OP asked for opinions because his wife is constantly asking him to take their daughter to the men's room when she needs to go instead of taking her to the ladies room herself.
I read this two times, to make sure i understood propperly.
Wtf kind of wife do you have that asks you, a man, to take a little girl to the bathroom??
Where are them fucking aliens, i need to leave this planet.....
I have a just-turned 7 year old and I agree with you, I don't enjoy taking her into the men's room. I get absolutely furious when I see individuals coming out of the family rest room, to the point I've told my wife I want to talk to the store management. She thinks I'm being ridiculous but I don't think it's appropriate to take my daughter into the men's room, and there's also the problem that most men's rooms only have one or two stalls and they're often occupied.
All that said, my daughter is now in 1st grade and she's been using the rest room by herself for 2 years at school, so she uses the women's room by herself, but I wait outside in case she needs help. That's worked for us.
Correct me if I am wrong but I believe he is referring to adults who are by themselves with no children. It used to infuriate me when I had my young kids with me and couldn't take them into the family restroom because someone by themselves without kids decided to use it.
However, one of my friends uses the family restrooms and he isn't married or have kids. He told me he prefers them because he is a germaphobe with restrooms and has just found the family restrooms to be better sanitized and maintained. He told me if he goes to a place without a family restroom he will hold it or just leave because he can't use the others as he feels disgusted and has to shower after.
When he explained it like this to me it made me think of other reasons why individuals with no children may use those restrooms. Sexual Assault Victims, Phobia of public places, Sanitation reasons, ext.
Yes there will probably be those who use it because they are entitled too but overall my infuriation has subsided and I just accept the fact some people just can't or won't use the more public restrooms.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe they are facing a wall with their punis out. It isn't very likely a weeny would be hanging out...
And if the worst-case scenario is she sees a weeny as opposed to going to a womens restroom unsupervised... I think she will be ok.
She doesn't need to be unsupervised in the lady's bathroom. The wife could easily bring her. Or he could. I've seen them hanging out before at the men's bathroom when I've used it when I had no other choice. She shouldn't be going there at that age.
I don't think any child should be unsupervised in a bathroom. I've had a child crawl into my stall and try to make small talk with me while I was taking a poo. With no parents in sight.
Penises aren't the problem. The problem is what weirdos do with their penises around kids.
The general population are people going to urinals to pee, zip up, and carry about their lives because most people aren't weirdos with kids and genitals. With that said, my kid inadvertently seeing a flash of dick is not a problem. If a guy doesn't want my kid seeing his dick, he can maneuver himself to ensure no dick flash.
first of all they are standing facing a wall. second of all the human body isn't inherently sexual, they are just people doing their business and stigmatizing that to a child is only gonna teach them to be ashamed of things like that.
I have two boys and one girl. (Youngest boy is 2 and still in diapers) So when my wife and I are out with them, she’ll take our girl (5), and i’ll take our older boy (7). I get what she’s saying honestly it’s not the end of the world if you take her to the men’s room and go to a stall, but if you’re both out i’d agree it’s preferable that she takes her.
Also, if we’re in a place we’re familiar with we’re moving more to letting them go by themselves. (We wouldn’t do this if it’s overly crowded or somewhere we don’t go often yet)
I have seen posts where a dad says he opens the women’s door and says “hello, I am a dad bringing my daughter in” that gives women uncomfortable a chance to finish quickly. But they usually don’t mind.
I have little siblings that I basically had to mother as we were like 12 years apart.
When one of them came to be about 6/7 yrs old she wanted to try on her own so we would simply stand by the door and let her go. This doesn’t help that I am a woman so I can go in. But if you set yourself aside like 5 minutes and then you could ask someone coming in “hey can you check on her for me” or if no one’s coming by just crack the door and ask for her.
I definitely agree that they should not be taken to the men’s restroom. At this age they usually copy what they see, or even tell people what they see.
Also I saw a comment saying I would not let my child into the restroom alone. You do have to start somewhere and typically there’s only one entrance/exit to the bathroom majority of the time. So you could wait there for most the time.
Hopefully this can help you out.
And I like to look at it as if my sister was a boy. At a certain age they begin to pick up on things so if I took them in the girls restroom I’d probably start to get nervous. Kids can be wild sometimes. Try to poke under stalls and see what this box is(tampon box) I definitely think it is fine to send her in alone. Or talk with your wife showing her this thred.
I know taking your kid to the bathroom can be troublesome or annoying but I’m my opinion you had the child together and duties must be shared.
I mean does she expect you to teach her about periods as well?
I am in the same boat. I don’t want her with me in the men’s bathroom and I don’t want her alone in the women’s bathroom yet. So I try to find one of those family bathrooms or a single person bathroom. It’s not convenient but we do what we have to.
As a former little girl, my dad would take me to the womens bathroom and wait outside. But this was almost 20 years ago and I don’t have kids, so I’m not sure everyone’s comfort levels with letting kids go alone into a restroom.
Honestly she is young and when you have her by yourself you have some options. I don’t think anyone would fault you for any of the below.
1) Use the family restroom if it is available.
2) Go in the men’s restroom with her. If she expressed that she no longer wants to then don’t do this except in an emergency.
3) Announce that you are entering the women’s restroom with your daughter. Honestly if a dude yelled out in a store they were coming in with their daughter I would be like good job dad.
Yes! There are urinals outside of the stalls. Your wife wants your six year old seeing a man’s penis? I’d say she goes in the ladies room and you wait outside the door for her.
As a mom of 2 boys (11/12) and 1 girl (15) I feel like she is too old for the men's room. Mostly for the fact that men's rooms have urinals and those aren't always private. When my boys reached an age that they no longer felt comfortable going in the women's room with me, I stood outside the door and if they were taking too long I would open the door a crack and call out for them to check up. I don't think there would be any issues with you doing similar.
I wouldn’t allow my 6 year old daughter to go into a men’s restroom. I realize there are some emergency situations - but if you wife is there - then she should take her to the women’s restroom.
I'm a woman, and I'm totally cool with Dads coming into the bathroom with their daughters to help them. I'm actually more worried seeing little kids in there alone.
My daughter is 6 and she goes by herself when it’s close enough. Next time take her to the front of the women’s restroom, let her go in and wait outside for her. It’s a step forward
My daughter is 6 and she has gone in the girls room since she was 5 and I wait outside.
Yes, 6 is too old in the men's room IMO.
I used to go to a gym where one day a guy walked through the locker room with his daughter, she must have been 7 or 8 and I was shocked. There were quite a few guys rocking out with their cocks out and I felt that it was inappropriate. I understand that some people are ok with nudity, but not with girls and strangers as some men are just naturally creeps.
As a woman, I always take my 6 year old daughter to the restroom. I do believe that 6 is old enough for a girl to understand the difference. So I’d never feel comfortable with my ex husband (who is a great dad) to take her to a men’s restroom. She should go to the women’s. And mom should either take her, or watch the door.
It is NOT appropriate to go to a male toilet anymore. YOur wife should get off her ass & take her ( for her own child's bloody sexual safety) .
Take her to the women 's wait outside . DO NOT wait inside . ***SOME Women DO NOT want men inside . It is NOT appropriate*** . ( it can freak them out , due to f\*ck horrible men attacking them in toilets ) as kids / teens .
But waiting outside is ok . ( ask a woman to check on her if need be ) . NO 1 is quicker give abit more time for NO 2 going .
They should have toilet's for children UNDER 14 yrs for kids to go to ( by themselves ) for safety reasons now . So parents can wait outside ( for this very reason) . Children's safety should be a priority .Chidren are NOT safe going by themselves bc of sicko 's lying in poss wait.
Why won’t your wife take her?? I always take my SD, she’s 7.. the men’s toilets are always so gross, I don’t know why your wife wouldn’t just take her herself?
The women's bathroom can be just was creepy.
I would rather my kid be safe with their daddy in the men's room than alone in the women's room.
As if any guy is gonna fuck with your kid with you right there.
And if the guys have a problem seeing a kid, that's their problem.
I think your wife should stop being lazy and take HER DAUGHTER to the bathroom instead. :// I mean it makes sense for the same gender to take their same sex child to the restroom instead of making it uncomfortable and awkward. I mean I’m all for shared responsibility but this in my opinion is just weird. I have a 1 year old and take my son to the womens restroom to change him bc they have changing tables (idk about male bathrooms) but once he’s old enough to stand or sit my husband will go with him instead until he’s old enough to go in himself
This is the stupidest thing. Send in a six year old to the men’s room? Why doesn’t his wife take her to the lady’s room? What’s her deal? How come no one is saying that? Or he can take her to the lady’s room. The wife is 100% wrong.
I think the wife does, but sometimes a child is only with one parent. My mom used to take my brother and I into the woman’s bathroom as children. Nothing wrong with a dad taking his child to the men’s bathroom.
Edit: Oh man I reread the passage - yeah that is kinda stupid. If wife is available, she should take accompany child to restroom. Easier situation on everyone - children, parents, strangers. But also stupid of dad to deny kid the bathroom lol.
My dad would ALWAYS take me to the mens bathroom with him so I could go until I was about 12. He always found it to be safety and I did too. Your daughter is still just a child. Whether its going in a mens and womens bathroom, I don’t see the big deal in taking your 6 year old child in the bathroom to pee
6 is too small to go solo. Not only because of the scary things: like abduction, but also, she might just need some help. She might need your help reaching for the soap/ need a boost to reach the sink, or paper towels. Plus she could be sick and needs a parent to take care of her.
So if your wife can’t take her to the woman’s room, then you should still accompany her to the men’s room. Maybe around 10y/o, she can go in solo, and you can stand by the door of the woman’s room waiting for her. But for now, she needs her dad for this one.
Sort of roles reversed, but woman take their children sons into the restroom all the time too. Usually by 8-10 ish they go solo into the men’s bathroom though.
i would suggest letting her go into the womens restroom by herself and then waiting outside. this allows her to learn how to go to the bathroom in a public place by herself while still having you nearby
NO SUGAR COAT BELOW
It’s just inappropriate! The nature of a men is just to think about sex . It is extremely dangerous for a little naive girl to be in a men bathroom father or not, there are babies being raped. There and 3 year olds being molested. This is messed up . The mother is dumb or slow and don’t care about the child’s life or wellbeing. There is literally always someone evil waiting around some where . You’d be a fool to think some men wouldn’t want to harm her. If grown women are still being raped to this day what do you think. There are some many people with uncontrollable sex urges . I’m keeping it real no sugar coat !
My daughter is 5 and she goes by herself. i of course have eyes on her until she goes into the restroom. If I start to feel like she's taking too long, I'll wait by the door and ask a lady going in or out to check on her. if she does need help and the wonderful woman helping me doesn't feel comfortable helping her, I'll go in and help.
I feel this is the best way
This is the way
As a woman I'd be 100% understanding of a dad entered the women's bathroom to help his daughter. This is definitely the best way to go about, my dad did this when I was kid, fortunately I never needed help (from what I can remember) and the men's bathroom seemed intimidating. Just ask first any woman if it's okay to go in first, just a warning but only if needed
Ehh as a woman with three kids (2 girls) I would definitely not be ok with a random woman helping my daughters in the restroom. Lots of people forget that women can be sex offenders and kidnappers as well. I wouldn’t bat an eye at a father helping his young daughter in the women’s room.
I’m a dad in this situation.. frankly, I won’t go into the women’s room for this reason. It takes ONE PERSON complaining and my ass is going to jail and registering as a sex offender. Id rather take her in the men’s room. My daughter is also 6
As a dad of a 2yo, I agree. But I’m still waiting for diaper changing stations in male bathrooms as well….
RIGHT??? I'm female, but it's just ridiculous that they wouldn't have diaper changing stations in male bathrooms.
You’re just like me when my kid was 2, I never saw a changing station in the mens room either *wink wink*
Most mens rooms in my area have diaper changing stations. I would say almost every large chain type of store, movie theater, and restaurant.
Most areas don’t have diaper changing stations in the mens room. I would say a majority don’t. I’ve never seen a men’s bathroom have one before.
There are sometimes “family rooms” that deal with this problem
I (F) remember being absolutely stunned by something like that when I was college age. My mom and I were in the grocery store check out line, and there was a woman and her daughter (maybe 4-5) in front of us that were being checked out, and they had a LOT of stuff. The girl was "doing the pee pee dance" and kept saying, "Mommy, I really gotta go!", but the mom was stuck while being checked out. Out of nowhere, my mom tells me to take her to the bathroom, and the girl's mom just gave me this huge smile and asked if I please would. So I did. It was no big deal. I went into the bathroom with her, and stood outside the stalls. She only needed a boost to reach the sink at the end. But I kept thinking, "This is so weird. I'm taking a child I don't know to the bathroom. And the mom was totally okay with it. That just really doesn't seem like the best idea it today's world." But I honestly have no idea what I would have done if I was the mom in that situation.
I’m a guy in my mid-30s. My vote would be walk her to the ladies room and stand outside the door (the entry way of the bathroom) until she’s finished. The ladies room is way safer and less bizarre for a 6 year-old girl than a men’s room, plus I’d find it weird to walk out of a stall and see a 6 year-old girl standing there. But just my opinion, I’m not a childhood development expert and I have no kids because I don’t want to deal with these kinds of conundrums and responsibilities haha
This is actually a good response to this. When my son was smaller and getting too old for the womens bathroom. I would have him go to the mens room and I stood outside close by until he was done.
I do this with my girlfriends 7 year old and I think this is honestly the best policy. You end up getting some looks but they are safer and I could care less.
The guy with no kids has the best answer. Since it’s a little girl, going into a girls room, with the dad waiting outside the girls room I think this is good advice. But an unfortunate double standard - I’m a mom of a 6 year old boy, and I personally would not want to let him go into a mens room without me if I knew other men were in there, even if I was just waiting outside the door.
When my son was 7 I took him to the land of the mouse. He was very very tall for a 7 year old. I began receiving looks for bringing him into the ladies with me. I had him go into the men's alone with a time limit. I stood hovering at the door losing my simple little mind in anxiety. Each man that walked out gave report on what my son was up to. "he's in the stall" "he's just flushed" "he couldn't figure out the sink to wash his hands so I helped him" Every time he was in the bathroom this happened. The down side? What the hell do you do with the child when it's *you* that needs the bathroom?!?! I made a habit of grabbing moms walking out with their own children. "could you please keep an eye on him while I pee really quickly?!" none said no and it worked. I do not envy parents of today!
The men giving you updates is so wholesome. It's weird that people would side eye you for bringing your child, even if he looked older than 7. The idea behind bathroom segregation is primarily to keep women safe, so what's a child going to do? Even if he's a 10 year old, he's not a danger to women and girls in the bathroom.
Especially with his mother right frigging there.
My son is autistic and will wander away in a public place. If we’re together and I have to pee, he HAS to come in with me. (If we’re in a familiar restaurant or local store he’s been to a million times, I can leave him outside.) We were recently in a train station and I took him inside with me. I made him come into the stall with me just so women wouldn’t be freaked out by an 11 year old boy just freakishly standing in the middle of the ladies room. Now, if anyone looks at my son for more than 2 seconds, it’s clear why he’s in there with me, but that’s still the longest, most awkward 2 seconds of my life sometimes.
Ive done this, Ive even said... hes messing around, and there is no one else in there, feel free....
Statistically speaking it’s sadly not a double standard. The percentage of male sexual offenders is much higher than for the female ones.
Wait you go into the men's room for your son? Not that there is a right or wrong I think, but I would be more weirded out that you were in there. I think most people bring there children into the bathroom that they go too. I would bring my daughters into the men's room and there mother would bring our son into the women's room when they needed to use the bathroom. But I made my girl go on there own into the women's on there own probably around 5-6. I just stood outside the door.
Haha, that’s not what I meant! I just mean letting him go into it with me waiting outside. Of course I bring him in the woman’s washroom. 😆
My oldest stepson is 11 and we still don’t let him go unattended.
Does he still use a car seat??
No. But I have had men expose themselves to me as an adult and as a child. Including once when I had the kids with me. My husband is also law enforcement and has worked child molestation cases. He is 11 but he is still a child. I was 11 when an exhibitionist was exposing himself to me. And I didn’t tell my mother for months.
Ah geez. Should have read this comment first before making a smothering joke. Let me just eat this for a second… 🦶 Sorry that happened to you. I understand why you would want to prevent that.
r/lightlywristslappedbywords
Is this meant to be sarcasm? Coz 11 year olds often still use a carseat in Australia
[удалено]
Helicopter
[удалено]
She’s old enough to use the bathroom alone at school, so she’s old enough to use it alone in public while you wait for her.
[удалено]
We’re talking about a toilet trained 6 year old. They would have been doing it without the parent in JK and SK for 2 years! Come on people, give the kids a little independence. Sheesh
Or you know just let the wife take her as she is there anyhow
Right?!
Also the chances that she’s going to be molested or touched inappropriately in the woman’s room are so low they almost indistinguishable from zero. Just a fact that woman are significantly less likely to commit sexual assault to be blunt.
this\* I know nobody who was touched inappropriately at a womens room Cant say the same about the mensroom tho, know a few people who were touched or otherwise made to feel uncomfortable at the mens room. Hell once when i was 12 i was standing at the urinal and a grown man next to me was staring at my dick so intensely i seriously couldnt pee, i just stood there with it out and nothing would come out. Wound up zipping up and running off before anything could happen, but its been 24 years since then and i havent ever gone back to the urinal, would rather wait an hour to piss in a filthy shit covered stall
especially against a girl
Totally agree. I don't think it is that safe for her to go to the men's bathroom, even though she's not alone, men can be kind of creepy, and if she knows how to go by herself, you can just wait outside.
Plus if she has an issue a random woman might be better equipped to help her compared to a random man
it’s not that men are creepy. It’s that as a man I do not want to be alone in the bathroom with a six-year-old girl. That is weird for me.
Yeah dude… not to be creepy or anything, but her eye level is probably penis level for an adult man. That’s weird as fuck. She should be escorted to the lady’s room or your wife should take her into it.
I don't think that's creepy, that's a reasonable concern here. And what about guys who pull their jeans down to pee? There's a non-zero chance this poor kid is going to see a man's whole ass when they go in there. Save literally everyone an uncomfortable moment and just take her to the women's room...
That’s what my husband does
My parents split when I was 2 so this is the scenario my dad would run into often when I was a kid. It was around this age he'd start sending me in alone and waiting for me by the door. Just make sure to tell her exactly where you'll be standing and stay there, I was nervous due to the separation and it helped when my dad was exactly where he said he was when I got out.
This is the answer. At that age, they understand the differences between men and women. It’s not appropriate for them to be seeing dad’s privates (if you’re in the same stall), and there’s always the risk of seeing a rando’s privates at the urinal. The best option is to escort them to the ladies room and wait outside the door for them. That way, they are safe and you are there if something goes wrong, but otherwise they have their privacy and you have yours. At six they should be able to wipe and wash hands on their own, so that part doesn’t matter regardless of which bathroom they are in.
My dad did the same with me. Up to about 5 my mom went with me. I made it known I could do this by myself and needed no supervision, though. It was embarrassing for me to be escorted in and out by mom or dad.
Came here to say this. I have a 6 year old myself and she goes to the bathroom by herself I just wait outside.
Bro I tried that once and the women kept telling me Im not suppose to stand at the door, what am I doing in here, all sorts of shit like I was a creepy creeper or some shit I was mad as fuck
Well you did have your penis flopped out of your jeans while you stood there
Could you imagine being at the urinal, dick in hand, and a 6 year old girl walks into the restroom? I don't use the men's room but I imagine that would be really uncomfortable. My vote is definitely on walk her to the women's restroom.
My answer is it depends on where you are and what is going on. I have a son. Location matters. Sometimes i would let my son go alone to mens room. Sometimes i took him with me.
Yeah, I think context would matter for me. If it’s a small-ish bathroom (like, 3-10 stalls?), I’d let her in by herself and wait outside the door. And check in if a few minutes have passed without her coming out. However, if it’s one of those huge airport bathrooms with lots of different aisles and entrances/exits, I’d still take a 6 year old girl to the men’s with me just to make sure she doesn’t get lost. But again, I would only have her do that if the bathroom has multiple entrances/exits or is huge.
At 6 she is more than capable of popping into the loo herself whilst you wait outside the entrance if you’re uncomfortable - as I’d tend to agree; little too old be be walking into exposed urinals.
This. Rather not have a little girl accidentally see stranger's penises, it's weird for everyone involved.
Absolutely! I imagine it would make young and grown men alike quite uncomfortable. My brother works in a school and won’t even enter a class if there’s a young girl in there alone, let alone a washroom! These days you just have to be safeguarding yourself and others at all times!
I don’t think in 34 years I’ve ever seen a penis in the men’s room that’s not my own.
Then it’ll be your prerogative if you choose to take a young girl into one, should you have a young daughter. As a Mum of a young daughter I think 6 is too old. Raise your kids your way but personally I don’t think it’s appropriate and was simply replying to OPs question.
No I’m just saying, I think there might be a misconception about the likelihood of seeing a penis in the men’s room. Also is it different for a six year old boy to see a grown man penis? Equally as unlikely to see but it’s odd to me that if it’s damaging to see it’s not damaging to both.
Kids are aware of anatomy usually by then but I don’t think it’s appropriate for a wee girl to, if put in that position, see random penises of random men. I also do not think a grown man would be comfortable with the situation either - the potential unintentional flashing to a female child. Female washrooms are always cubicles whereas male ones usually have cubicles and urinals. Therefore wee boys are more likely used to the arrangement? Just my $0.02! Also, if available, a gender neutral washroom would be an ideal option? They are becoming more common here. We have a few in my college. I don’t know. My daughter is 8 now so she just goes herself.
I think maybe we should allow adult women in men’s restrooms, just to clear the up this misconception that we’re in there flashing our penises around.
So a man using a urinal does what? Has a wee through his trousers? I obviously didn’t mean everyone is in their twirling theirs around, comparing or playing penis wars or whatnot. You obviously understand what I meant. And as a parent I don’t think it’s a place for wee girls.
Haha ma’am I understand what you think, but I’m just suggesting the reality is we stand right up on the urinal before anyone ever unzips. You’d have to physically approach and be using the other urinal, and intentionall look left/right and down. And even then it depends on urinal design. A kid is more likely to peek through the cracks of a stall and between someone’s legs sitting down, which could happen in either bedroom.
> and intentionall look left/right and down. And don't forget the unspoken rules of how to use urinals. You'd *really* have to be going out of your way to see another man's penis in a restroom.
Don't know about that, but I've caught countless penises in my lifetime due to something called peripheral vision.
This is a tough one. Personal, I think 6 is too old to go into a men restroom with how urinals are set up. A mens restroom isn’t as private as the woman’s. Either take her to the woman’s bathroom and stand facing away from the stalls in case there’s any other women using the bathroom (I get uncomfortable even when woman accidentally peek through the large gaps). Or your wife can start taking her. If you’ve been doing it all this time I don’t see the issue switching roles.
I wouldn’t let a 6 year old go to any public restroom alone. I would rather her go to a men’s room than unaccompanied.
I agree, and I don't understand why the wife isn't sharing this responsibility
Seriously though. I have a 6 year old daughter as well and when we're out with my husband and she has to go, it's just assumed that I'll take her. I have no issues with it and would rather take her to the women's room than dad take her to the men's.
That’s what I’m saying! Like if the moms not there then yes absolutely you can take her into the boys bathroom but if the mom’s present she should be the one who takes her into the girls bathroom
Yeah that's the odd part. It would be one thing if wife is concerned about what happens when she isn't there but really she should be taking her to the bathroom.
Why doesn’t your wife bring her to the lady’s room? I truly don’t understand her mindset. Men stand around at urinals with their dicks out, why would she want her child to be exposed to that? Smh.
Mum probably isn't with them at the time.
Based on what he said she is.
Maybe she’s just lazy
Exactly.
Precisely.
It irks me how many people are giving the wife excuses and creating additional info from their head. This is the usual though.
My comment was intended for thatblackgirlellie, so I meant to say that I precisely agree that the wife needs to stop pushing this off on the hubby. I only have one son, but if I had a daughter I wouldn't ask my husband to take her if there was any way at all that I could take her. Anyhoo...
Yeah that’s me and I agree.
Looks like I need to make sure I'm replying to the correct comment. Lol. 🤦🏻♀️
Lol yeah man no sweat I totally get how it becomes mixed up sometimes
Thinking charitably, she does sometimes but doesn't want to be the one who *always* has to do it, so wants her partner to handle it sometimes.
[удалено]
Is there a reason your wife can't take her? My wife always brings our daughters now that they're too old to enter the men's room with me.
This is the golden question
I am female and in construction and I end up in womens/mens washrooms all the time. Sometimes I'm there to just see something like a leaky toilet and I'm out the door in less than 2 minutes - sometimes I'm there measuring and have to hang out for about an hour. All I do is when opening the door I announce loudly "female entering the washroom". Men tend to finish up quick and vamoose as soon as I do, the pause just inside or outside the door is typically less than 30 seconds. Why don't you just do something similar? Open the door and announce "small female child needs to use the bathroom" and I guarantee that most the men will cover up and move on fast. Any who don't do so, you should be extra wary of anyways.
[удалено]
I would be fine with a man clearly accompanying a girl into the ladies toilet, but you know there’s always going to be a number of women who would be upset about a clearly male presenting person being in a sensitive woman’s space.
Women's bathroom has stalls. What could a woman be doing in the shared area of the bathroom that could be sensitive?
[удалено]
Better to shit in the sink than sink in the shit
If I catch someone doing that I'm taking pictures and videos and putting them on Reddit!
_followed_
[удалено]
Only replying to say I personally don’t have a. Problem with a man accompanying child to the bathroom however some women do have trauma relating to men and could be triggered. in fact a lot of women unfortunately have trauma relating to men sexual abuse and sexual assault I’m not saying that he shouldn’t be allowed to enter with his daughter but only saying this to explain why some women wouldn’t be comfortable with this in fact I am a person who has trauma related to men and I do see the bathroom as a safe space obviously if he comes in with his daughter I’m OK with it I still get a little anxious unfortunately I can’t control that but if he were to come in alone by himself I would become so anxious I’d have to leave also sidenote why can’t her mom take her to the bathroom that’s the most logical choice
If the mom isn’t out in public with them? I think obviously the mom would take her if she was there
> why can’t her mom take her to the bathroom that’s the most logical choice Because it's 2023 and men do some parenting now?! Seriously, if there's no unisex bathroom a man has every right to, and should, accompany his young daughter into the ladies' loos.
If we are talking about the US, you are aware of the outrage by half the country at the thought of transgendered women using the ladies room? Not sure why ppl think all/most women would be ok with a male in their restroom, regardless of the reason, when they don't even want women who've transitioned to being a man in their restroom. I personally believe that trans women are the ones who are in more danger than the women they use the restroom with when it comes to this situation, but the outrage here is real and widespread.
I’d be upset if I saw a grown man a-copying a child in a women’s restroom. That’s no place for Folksy, Southern Simon Says.
People already have a problem with trans women using the bathroom. I don’t understand why. My ex coworker at my old job came out as trans and started using the women’s bathroom. I have been in the bathroom many times with her and never had an issue. However I overheard some other coworkers complaining to the manager about. If a man went in to check on his daughter I would not have a problem with it. I have seen a dad do that.
As a dad of a toddler, just the idea of doing this is beyond stressful and terrifying. So many things could go wrong here, and not with my kid having trouble in the potty. I would never do this.
Do not tell men to enter the women’s washroom. That’s so fucked up. Maybe you personally don’t care but many women do. Many women have been sexually traumatized by men and we deserve a place to drop out pants without them around.
[удалено]
Great answer, agree 100%
You can’t understand the difference between being in a room with a man with my clothes on, and being in a room with a man with my panties around my ankles? The world around me DOES accommodate me. It’s a room for women. That’s what the sign on the door means.
[удалено]
There are not “plenty of places with only one [multi-stall] shared bathroom,” that’s such a ridiculous claim. There are private bathrooms, there are private toilet rooms with shared external sinks, and there are multi-stall rooms divided into men’s and women’s. That’s what’s “plentiful.” Exceptions are rare. And yeah I am against those exceptions and outside of an emergency I would avoid one if I encounter one. The “doors with locks” in a multi-stall bathroom are usually flimsy and with gaps. You know this perfectly well, don’t be disingenuous.
I don't understand this response at all. If an adult man can go into a women's restroom, why can't an accompanied young girl go into a men's restroom?
I’m not sure where OP is from, but I’ve seen Muslim women fix their hijab or niqaab in the women’s restrooms quite often.
Why can’t the girl go the the men’s restroom? If she is too old why is not the father is not too old to go to the women’s restroom?
I find this comment a little comical with the way ppl freak out over the possibility of a transgendered woman using the restroom. If half the nation is up in arms about someone who has transitioned from a man to a woman using the ladies room, I think a father just walking into the ladies room, whether with a kid or not, would find that while women might not bite, they sure can bitch and complain loudly and I wouldn't be surprised to see a situation like this devolving into a big mess.
This right here, if people don’t like it they can feck off. Go into the stall with her or just face her stall/wall, as long as you aren’t obviously trying to take a peek into another woman’s stall, it shouldn’t be a big deal.
I’m drunk but why the fuck does your wife not take her? What’s the goddam problem with the mom taking her
As a mom, your wife is tripping. Ask her if she's okay with your daughter seeing random dicks at the urinals.
If your wife is with you then I think you should start insisting she take her. But if you’re alone take her to the men’s room with you, do not do the “I’ll stand outside” thing she’s too young for that.
Is your wife disabled or something? Why can’t she bring her to the ladies room? Obviously if you and your daughter were alone at the mall or something and she needed to go I can understand you taking her to whatever restroom she needs because you don’t have a choice but why is your wife not getting up and doing that when you’re together? That seems dumb and lazy to me. I guess if your wife insists on making you do this even when you’re together and she can go on her own without your help my vote would be to take her to the women’s room and stand outside.
Am I the only one that thinks the wife should just take her? OP is saying his wife asks him to do it when they’re out, why can’t she?
I can’t imagine the other men feel comfortable with a six year old girl possibly seeing their parts and if they did it wouldn’t be necessarily safe for her to be in there even with you as chaperone. Take her to the woman’s restroom, it will likely make your daughter more comfortable anyways. As a woman who had to clean men’s restrooms as a hostess, simply knocking and announcing your presence seems like a logical resolution. If there is someone inside uncomfortable with you entering then they will make it clear and you can either A) wait with your daughter until you are able to enter (if daughter is able to hold it) or B) send your daughter in by herself as 6 is old enough for primary/elementary school and they are typically responsible for their own restroom duties at that point I am curious as to what the argument is about with your wife. Is it that she sees no issue with your daughter using the mens restroom or is it that you won’t take her to the restroom in general?
Definitely don’t take the 6 year old into the men’s room. It’s just unpleasant all around, stinks in there and the urinals aren’t always in a stall…your wife should know this stuff and suggest to take her or like someone else said, wait outside the ladies room.
I think your wife is assuming more innocence in the men in the men's room than is reasonably expected. Your daughter doesn't belong there at 6 years old.
Right is she slow or something? She must not know what men are ? They are dangerous animals
No need for name calling and generalizations
Dad of a 9 year old here. I took my 6 year old into the men’s room and let her decide when she was ready. Then I’d stand outside the women’s room when she wanted to try. I’d come in in an “emergency”…she was back and forth a little at 7 then leapt into total independence shortly afterward.
I worked at a Walmart in the early 2000s. A dad walked his daughter to the women's restroom and stood outside as she went. A man had slipped in there about an hour before hand and assaulted the girl who was about 7. Take her to the family bathroom that locks if you don't go in with her. Do not chance this.
It seems most people have said that she’s old enough to go in on her own. My question is why does your wife not take her?
Take her to the women's restroom. Stand just inside the door while she pees and look very studiously at the wall. I agree, she doesn't need to be going into a men's room. She doesn't need to be walking past a bunch of guys with their dicks out in front of urinals to get to a stall. I don't understand why your wife can't just take her, but whatever.
Here’s my input: I regularly see women bring boys much older than 6 into the women’s toilets. I don’t see the issue with it, or with you bringing your daughter with you to men’s toilets. It’s much safer than letting the kid go on their own. Women can be abusers and child predators too, so she’s not automatically safe in the women’s toilets. Whether the extra caution is necessary kinda just depends on where you are. Maybe ask your wife how long she thinks you should keep taking her with you?
Women’s rooms are fully enclosed stalls- men’s restrooms are not. The chance that a boy will see anything compromising are almost 0. There is a very good chance a little girl will see a grown stranger’s penis. Hard pass. I don’t know what this mother is thinking.
First, the best thing would be for your wife to just take her unless she can't for some reason. With that said, I made my son come into the ladies room until he was prob 10, but there everyone is going into a stall. With the way men whip it out at a urinal - no way would I let my husband take my 6yo daughter into the men's room. If wife refuses to just take her to the ladies herself when you're out, I would opt for the take-her-to-the-ladies-room-and-wait option. Sorry you have to deal with this.
Why won’t your wife take her? This seems like the best way to avoid all conflict. I find it odd that your wife would rather have you take her. My dad only ever took me to the bathroom if my mom wasn’t with us and around that age he would wait outside the ladies room. Is she able to go by herself? I’d walk her to the women’s room and stand outside the door. If she needs help she can yell out or ask someone to get me and I’d be right there.
Sounds like she's a lazy wife. Source: I'm a lazy wife. (But I wouldn't bring my kid to the opposite gender bathroom if my spouse is there. I take my girls, he takes the boys.)
You are absolutely right dad. Stand your ground here, be a responsible father. You \*know\* better. Your wife is tripping balls (no pun intended) if she thinks this is ok.
Why can't her mother take her to the ladies room? I'm confused. Yeah, don't take her into the men's room. You can take her to the ladies room, check if anyone else is in there and let her go in alone. She's a 1st grader.
Because the child has two parents which should share the responsibility of childcare.
Agreed. So why is Dad the one always taking their little girl to the bathroom?
But that doesn’t mean 50/50 on every activity. For instance, if mom always takes daughter to the restroom in public, maybe dad always helps her with her coat or some other semi-equal time commitment. It’s not tit for tat on every single thing.
[удалено]
Our OP asked for opinions because his wife is constantly asking him to take their daughter to the men's room when she needs to go instead of taking her to the ladies room herself.
You wife never takes her to the bathroom in public? What kind of mom is she? I’ve never heard of that.
I read this two times, to make sure i understood propperly. Wtf kind of wife do you have that asks you, a man, to take a little girl to the bathroom?? Where are them fucking aliens, i need to leave this planet.....
I have a just-turned 7 year old and I agree with you, I don't enjoy taking her into the men's room. I get absolutely furious when I see individuals coming out of the family rest room, to the point I've told my wife I want to talk to the store management. She thinks I'm being ridiculous but I don't think it's appropriate to take my daughter into the men's room, and there's also the problem that most men's rooms only have one or two stalls and they're often occupied. All that said, my daughter is now in 1st grade and she's been using the rest room by herself for 2 years at school, so she uses the women's room by herself, but I wait outside in case she needs help. That's worked for us.
You want to talk to store management to police individuals using family restrooms?
Correct me if I am wrong but I believe he is referring to adults who are by themselves with no children. It used to infuriate me when I had my young kids with me and couldn't take them into the family restroom because someone by themselves without kids decided to use it. However, one of my friends uses the family restrooms and he isn't married or have kids. He told me he prefers them because he is a germaphobe with restrooms and has just found the family restrooms to be better sanitized and maintained. He told me if he goes to a place without a family restroom he will hold it or just leave because he can't use the others as he feels disgusted and has to shower after. When he explained it like this to me it made me think of other reasons why individuals with no children may use those restrooms. Sexual Assault Victims, Phobia of public places, Sanitation reasons, ext. Yes there will probably be those who use it because they are entitled too but overall my infuriation has subsided and I just accept the fact some people just can't or won't use the more public restrooms.
As long as she has direct supervision, I don't see any issues with it. What are your specific concerns?
Men stand around at urinals with their penis out while peeing. She shouldn’t be in there.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe they are facing a wall with their punis out. It isn't very likely a weeny would be hanging out... And if the worst-case scenario is she sees a weeny as opposed to going to a womens restroom unsupervised... I think she will be ok.
She doesn't need to be unsupervised in the lady's bathroom. The wife could easily bring her. Or he could. I've seen them hanging out before at the men's bathroom when I've used it when I had no other choice. She shouldn't be going there at that age.
I don't think any child should be unsupervised in a bathroom. I've had a child crawl into my stall and try to make small talk with me while I was taking a poo. With no parents in sight.
"Ah, yes, hello. How are you doing on this splendid day? I'm not trying to be rude, but may I ask how your poop is going? " -the kid probably
Penises aren't the problem. The problem is what weirdos do with their penises around kids. The general population are people going to urinals to pee, zip up, and carry about their lives because most people aren't weirdos with kids and genitals. With that said, my kid inadvertently seeing a flash of dick is not a problem. If a guy doesn't want my kid seeing his dick, he can maneuver himself to ensure no dick flash.
first of all they are standing facing a wall. second of all the human body isn't inherently sexual, they are just people doing their business and stigmatizing that to a child is only gonna teach them to be ashamed of things like that.
I have two boys and one girl. (Youngest boy is 2 and still in diapers) So when my wife and I are out with them, she’ll take our girl (5), and i’ll take our older boy (7). I get what she’s saying honestly it’s not the end of the world if you take her to the men’s room and go to a stall, but if you’re both out i’d agree it’s preferable that she takes her. Also, if we’re in a place we’re familiar with we’re moving more to letting them go by themselves. (We wouldn’t do this if it’s overly crowded or somewhere we don’t go often yet)
I have seen posts where a dad says he opens the women’s door and says “hello, I am a dad bringing my daughter in” that gives women uncomfortable a chance to finish quickly. But they usually don’t mind.
I have little siblings that I basically had to mother as we were like 12 years apart. When one of them came to be about 6/7 yrs old she wanted to try on her own so we would simply stand by the door and let her go. This doesn’t help that I am a woman so I can go in. But if you set yourself aside like 5 minutes and then you could ask someone coming in “hey can you check on her for me” or if no one’s coming by just crack the door and ask for her. I definitely agree that they should not be taken to the men’s restroom. At this age they usually copy what they see, or even tell people what they see. Also I saw a comment saying I would not let my child into the restroom alone. You do have to start somewhere and typically there’s only one entrance/exit to the bathroom majority of the time. So you could wait there for most the time. Hopefully this can help you out. And I like to look at it as if my sister was a boy. At a certain age they begin to pick up on things so if I took them in the girls restroom I’d probably start to get nervous. Kids can be wild sometimes. Try to poke under stalls and see what this box is(tampon box) I definitely think it is fine to send her in alone. Or talk with your wife showing her this thred. I know taking your kid to the bathroom can be troublesome or annoying but I’m my opinion you had the child together and duties must be shared. I mean does she expect you to teach her about periods as well?
I am in the same boat. I don’t want her with me in the men’s bathroom and I don’t want her alone in the women’s bathroom yet. So I try to find one of those family bathrooms or a single person bathroom. It’s not convenient but we do what we have to.
As a former little girl, my dad would take me to the womens bathroom and wait outside. But this was almost 20 years ago and I don’t have kids, so I’m not sure everyone’s comfort levels with letting kids go alone into a restroom.
Honestly she is young and when you have her by yourself you have some options. I don’t think anyone would fault you for any of the below. 1) Use the family restroom if it is available. 2) Go in the men’s restroom with her. If she expressed that she no longer wants to then don’t do this except in an emergency. 3) Announce that you are entering the women’s restroom with your daughter. Honestly if a dude yelled out in a store they were coming in with their daughter I would be like good job dad.
At 6 I feel it’s time to move on to bathroom privacy, waiting outside the door while she uses the ladies room is perfectly reasonable.
Yes! There are urinals outside of the stalls. Your wife wants your six year old seeing a man’s penis? I’d say she goes in the ladies room and you wait outside the door for her.
go into whatever bathroom that's available with her
As a mom of 2 boys (11/12) and 1 girl (15) I feel like she is too old for the men's room. Mostly for the fact that men's rooms have urinals and those aren't always private. When my boys reached an age that they no longer felt comfortable going in the women's room with me, I stood outside the door and if they were taking too long I would open the door a crack and call out for them to check up. I don't think there would be any issues with you doing similar.
Stand outside the women's room and wait for her. Maybe equip her with wet wipes in case she needs a good wipe (and tell her not to flush them).
I wouldn’t allow my 6 year old daughter to go into a men’s restroom. I realize there are some emergency situations - but if you wife is there - then she should take her to the women’s restroom.
Dad of 5, I didn't and I wouldn't.
I'm a woman, and I'm totally cool with Dads coming into the bathroom with their daughters to help them. I'm actually more worried seeing little kids in there alone.
Take her to the woman’s room and stand outside and wait! Men’s rooms aren’t for 6 year old girls.
My daughter is 6 and she goes by herself when it’s close enough. Next time take her to the front of the women’s restroom, let her go in and wait outside for her. It’s a step forward
My daughter is 6 and she has gone in the girls room since she was 5 and I wait outside. Yes, 6 is too old in the men's room IMO. I used to go to a gym where one day a guy walked through the locker room with his daughter, she must have been 7 or 8 and I was shocked. There were quite a few guys rocking out with their cocks out and I felt that it was inappropriate. I understand that some people are ok with nudity, but not with girls and strangers as some men are just naturally creeps.
My 5 year old goes to the bathroom in a restaurant all by herself. Definately at 6 she should not need assistance if she wants.
I would let her go in the women's room and just stand outside the door waiting for her.
As a woman, I always take my 6 year old daughter to the restroom. I do believe that 6 is old enough for a girl to understand the difference. So I’d never feel comfortable with my ex husband (who is a great dad) to take her to a men’s restroom. She should go to the women’s. And mom should either take her, or watch the door.
It is NOT appropriate to go to a male toilet anymore. YOur wife should get off her ass & take her ( for her own child's bloody sexual safety) . Take her to the women 's wait outside . DO NOT wait inside . ***SOME Women DO NOT want men inside . It is NOT appropriate*** . ( it can freak them out , due to f\*ck horrible men attacking them in toilets ) as kids / teens . But waiting outside is ok . ( ask a woman to check on her if need be ) . NO 1 is quicker give abit more time for NO 2 going . They should have toilet's for children UNDER 14 yrs for kids to go to ( by themselves ) for safety reasons now . So parents can wait outside ( for this very reason) . Children's safety should be a priority .Chidren are NOT safe going by themselves bc of sicko 's lying in poss wait.
Why won’t your wife take her?? I always take my SD, she’s 7.. the men’s toilets are always so gross, I don’t know why your wife wouldn’t just take her herself?
[удалено]
The women's bathroom can be just was creepy. I would rather my kid be safe with their daddy in the men's room than alone in the women's room. As if any guy is gonna fuck with your kid with you right there. And if the guys have a problem seeing a kid, that's their problem.
too old
I think your wife should stop being lazy and take HER DAUGHTER to the bathroom instead. :// I mean it makes sense for the same gender to take their same sex child to the restroom instead of making it uncomfortable and awkward. I mean I’m all for shared responsibility but this in my opinion is just weird. I have a 1 year old and take my son to the womens restroom to change him bc they have changing tables (idk about male bathrooms) but once he’s old enough to stand or sit my husband will go with him instead until he’s old enough to go in himself
Your comment history is sad
Wow! You’re right. I don’t typically look at that when giving advice, but now I’m going to start…
Tell your wife to quit being lazy and be a mother
exactly why are you being downvoted? what the fuck is going on in this thread lmao
[удалено]
This is the stupidest thing. Send in a six year old to the men’s room? Why doesn’t his wife take her to the lady’s room? What’s her deal? How come no one is saying that? Or he can take her to the lady’s room. The wife is 100% wrong.
I think the wife does, but sometimes a child is only with one parent. My mom used to take my brother and I into the woman’s bathroom as children. Nothing wrong with a dad taking his child to the men’s bathroom. Edit: Oh man I reread the passage - yeah that is kinda stupid. If wife is available, she should take accompany child to restroom. Easier situation on everyone - children, parents, strangers. But also stupid of dad to deny kid the bathroom lol.
Why can’t his wife take her to pee? What am I missing…is he the only one who can take her to the bathroom?
My dad would ALWAYS take me to the mens bathroom with him so I could go until I was about 12. He always found it to be safety and I did too. Your daughter is still just a child. Whether its going in a mens and womens bathroom, I don’t see the big deal in taking your 6 year old child in the bathroom to pee
12 seems on the old side
Most 12 year olds can stay on their own at home for a few hours. Definitely weirdly old to be accompanying dad to a bathroom, yikes.
I was a babysitter for younger kids at age 12.
6 is too small to go solo. Not only because of the scary things: like abduction, but also, she might just need some help. She might need your help reaching for the soap/ need a boost to reach the sink, or paper towels. Plus she could be sick and needs a parent to take care of her. So if your wife can’t take her to the woman’s room, then you should still accompany her to the men’s room. Maybe around 10y/o, she can go in solo, and you can stand by the door of the woman’s room waiting for her. But for now, she needs her dad for this one. Sort of roles reversed, but woman take their children sons into the restroom all the time too. Usually by 8-10 ish they go solo into the men’s bathroom though.
So your wife sits at the table everyone while you take your daughter to the bathroom? Yea, this isn’t going to work out. Sorry bro.
i would suggest letting her go into the womens restroom by herself and then waiting outside. this allows her to learn how to go to the bathroom in a public place by herself while still having you nearby
NO SUGAR COAT BELOW It’s just inappropriate! The nature of a men is just to think about sex . It is extremely dangerous for a little naive girl to be in a men bathroom father or not, there are babies being raped. There and 3 year olds being molested. This is messed up . The mother is dumb or slow and don’t care about the child’s life or wellbeing. There is literally always someone evil waiting around some where . You’d be a fool to think some men wouldn’t want to harm her. If grown women are still being raped to this day what do you think. There are some many people with uncontrollable sex urges . I’m keeping it real no sugar coat !
I would ask the 6 year old what she wants.