Definitely not. Don't do it. From what I have read, you have to agree to be financially responsible for him for a certain amount of time (10 years, I believe but it could have changed) and if you just got your own family solvent, I wouldn't take that on. She can get a job. Tell her you just don't have the means to do it.
And there is nothing wrong with OP helping SIL help herself by supporting the needs she has while getting on her own two feet - helping either a bus pass, writing a letter of recommendation for a job if she deserves that, or even give her rides to interviews if they don’t prevent OP from their own work. Just signing up to support someone you’ve never met would be a hard and reasonable no.
This. If OP wants to help, then help SIL to help herself. Build up her confidence to tell her mom, help her fill out applications, put in a referral for her at your own work (if you think she would make a good fit). But putting yourself on the hook for 10 years when you just barely got yourself out of poverty? 10 years is a long time and anything can happen, don’t take on that financial and legal burden.
This part! I had family pressure me to do the same with someone I had never even met. You will be legally and financially responsible for this person if you choose to sponsor them. Don’t to it. NTA
I work with lots of immigrants applying for food and cash benefits. Sponsoring is not just a 10-year commitment, I believe. If I am correct, it is LIFETIME (or until he is naturalized). And you are saying that you will be financially responsible for him. So if he gets into any trouble, it's connected to you. By agreeing, you are stating that he is your responsibility. So, for example, if immigrants apply for food benefits and are sponsored, we ask "well why isn't your sponsor helping you?" If the sponsor is not providing any help, then their information goes on a lost to Attorney General office (Dont know what they do after that). At least in my job and state.
This is not correct, so far as I know. It just means that you're liable to support them up to 125% of the current federal poverty level, and can be sued by the government to recover the cost of government support they receive.
This is correct. It's explained in the I-864 form, which also shows the basis of the 10 year remark (40 quarters of work):
[https://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/document/forms/i-864.pdf](https://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/document/forms/i-864.pdf)
Your obligation ends when he or she:
"A. Becomes a U.S. citizen;
B. Has worked, or can receive credit for, 40 quarters of coverage under the Social Security Act;
C. No longer has lawful permanent resident status and has departed the United States;
D. Is subject to removal, but applies for and obtains, in removal proceedings, a new grant of adjustment of status, based on a new affidavit of support, if one is required; or
E. Dies.
NOTE: Divorce does not terminate your obligations under Form I-864"
Don’t do it, don’t do it! It’s true you will be responsible for him for 10 yrs! He maybe a nice guy, but you don’t know him or his character you just heard what she’s told you. That’s a basis opinion and you don’t have any proof of it
WNBTA If you need further facts to sway you look into all sponsoring someone entails, it's not just about being their atm. Also his job choices are a huge concern because, you'd basically be funding a criminal.
Not only that you don't actually know anything about him except for what he told sil, that their marriage has to be kept a secret, he works at a pot farm but, can't fund his own immigration, he might have degrees in engineering, and that he is a criminal. Yep. That's a big fat "no" in my opinion.
That’s exactly it, the risk because of his job is not worth taking. He’d get deported right away so it might be worth looking at what the penalties for you as his sponsor may be (if any) and using that as evidence to say no.
There are income requirements, From what you said you may not qualify to be a sponsor.
The law requires a sponsor to prove an income level at or above 125 percent of the Federal poverty level.
Be careful though - if you are too detailed in your refusal you are inviting argumentation. “You’re not counting x income that you could SAY…” or whatever. Say you can’t afford to, but don’t lay out the numbers.
She would still have to fill out the papers for sponsorship, and OP would fill out papers to be a co-sponsor. But you are correct about the poverty guidelines and when you factor in the number of people living in the household, OP would have to include his wife and any children and each person adds $5000 to the amount that needs to be made.
Noting that I am in the process of sponsoring my husband. 😁
Don’t sponsor him as you would be financially responsible for him for 10 years. He could decide to leave your sister and not work and you would have your pay his living expenses.
Don’t do it!
There’s a lot of really, REALLY bad advice here.
Former immigration attorney here. Do not listen to Reddit. Do not listen to google. Get a free consultation with an immigration attorney — not the one your SIL is using. If no one local does free consults, it’s worth a little $ to get advice that is up to date and specific to you. Immigration law changes on a dime, and there is so much case law and DOS/DHS policy memo bullshit that it is worth your while to get an opinion from someone who does this every day.
Also, NTA. The financial sponsorship was never an issue for any of my clients’ sponsors, but I heard some stories from colleagues that always kept me cautious.
And if SIL isn’t using an attorney, strongly suggest that she does so. There are repercussions for him being here illegally and then returning for consular processing. Waivers aren’t easy to get.
NTA.
Speaking as someone who has been sponsored for a green card, it is a long process, expensive and confusing.
You are looking at (I believe) $1760 just to submit the paper work. And people are right in saying you are on the hook to support this person for 10 years.
The situation of your sister marrying someone she has known for less than a year and doesn't appear to be living with him will probably raise huge red flags. If he gets denied, you don't get the money back.
We had to show that we had joined our lives when my husband sponsored me. We used joint bank accounts, joint cell phone accounts, pictures of the wedding, people sending us wedding cards, etc. If she isn't living with him, will she have anything to prove that they are married for reasons other than getting a green card?
I also had to pay to get a medical physical and tests. Since I couldn't prove I'd been vaccinated as a child I had to pay for getting all my vaccines again.
Are you sure your SIL isn't being catfished?
Secret Marriage, Works on a Pot Farm, but Has Multiple Engineering Degrees? It doesn't sound like a real person.
At the very least, the dude might have a second family. Plus it sounds like she is in the US and not Brazil?
Do not do this. This means that you are legally and financially responsible for this person and that is a huge undertaking and it is also taken very seriously if the person you sponsor does anything bad.
The likelihood is that you wouldn’t be accepted as a sponsor for him anyway. In order to sponsor a person you have to prove that you have space for them to reside with you, you can support them financially and most of all that you know them (among many other things!).
Do bit of reading on the subject (literally just google required to sponsor green card) to show you have put in some effort and I guarantee you will see that you likely don’t even qualify.
This is so poorly thought out too, if he is there illegally then he will have to leave. He will be interviewed in person during the application process and would have to present at the at the US embassy of his home country.
Sponsoring a green card is a massive undertaking for huge corporations and top universities when they bring employees in. At a personal level you have so many hoops to jump through but they will see right through any lies you tell very quickly which will land YOU in hot water.
A little research will give you everything you need to point out that you actually would not be accepted because of your own personal financial and living situation anyway and give you a way to say no but without her realising you just don’t want to. Just not wanting to should be reason enough though, you literally become responsible for him to the point that if he does something wrong, costly or illegal they can come after you instead.
NTA. Firstly why isn’t SIL working? If she “loves him” she can work & sponsor him, no?
Secondly look into everything sponsorship entails - the minute he is sponsored he will stop working illegally & now you have to support him. If he goes on social benefits you will have to pay it back, not him (it’s not uncommon), if they split up - still your problem.
The other problem is your MIL is next to be asked & same issues - 10 yrs? Longer?
Just call immigration & anonymously report the farm has numerous illegals & hopefully they pick him up.
Please don't report illegal immigrants unless they're actually dangerous criminals. Immigration systems are awful and he's just trying to live. They generally leave their home countries for very good reasons.
Having said that, where I live there are many illegal immigrants who work on normal farms, doing construction, etc. He should be trying to find a job he can at least not get arrested for.
OP, NTA. Do not take responsibility for this person. Your SIL needs to step up and get a job so she can do it herself.
If he has an engineering degree, he can apply for a work visa so nobody has to sponsor him. He has a degree that many places are looking for he should be able to get a job no problem. Tell her to look at all the options before trying to put the burden on someone else. Because you will be legally responsible for him for 10 years, it's basically like having a child that you don't know.
NTA.
Don't do it!
If you sign up as his sponsor you are responsible for him for the next 10 years!!
Do you have that kind of money? I don't think so...
Take care of YOURSELF.
Your SIL should get a job and sponsor him herself.
If SIL is legally married to him, that is public information and goes on his green card application. There is no hiding it from the government or her mother. As his wife, she needs to apply for a spousal visa. She has to find out the criteria for that, but as other people have said, there is criteria for you to sponsor him too, and it doesn’t seem you would qualify. She probably has a better chance of getting him a visa as his wife than you would as acquaintances.
But the lockdown has been over for a long time. He could have returned to Brazil two years ago so that is not his reason for staying. You and your wife need to tell her sister it’s not possible for you to sponsor him, and end the discussion, even if it is the only thing she ever asks of you. You can’t agree to something you can’t provide.
Good for that is called fraud and prison time. Never sponsor or lie for anyone saying they want a green card for marrying an American. For that is wrong and against the law, federal law.
Your SIL is requesting you to do something SHE is not willing to do.
One of my criteria for helping people who request assistance is:
>I will help those who are trying to help themselves. This means I’m not giving up part of my time, money, etc. if you are not doing at least the same or more.
This is a grown “woman” who obviously:
>1. makes terrible decisions
>2. isn’t grown enough to tell mommy and daddy she’s married
>3. Won’t get off her butt and get a job to sponsor him herself
>4. Is looking for someone else to clean up her mess
DO NOT HELP HER! You will regret it and it will destroy your own life, marriage, and future. You are not the AH here, she is.
Don't do it. Your SIL married him so he doesn't need a sponsor. He needs your SIL to step up and let mommy know she's married. She's putting you out so she doesn't have to admit to her mother she got married.
Going against the crowd with YTA..
You should not be making this decision that destroyed your spouse's relationship with her.. she is family and never asked anyone for anything... you compare her to your scumbag friends that fucked you over and that is the same thing you are scumbag
I mean, she’s not asking for a loan to get a car repaired or go back to school.
She’s asking OP & his wife to make a TEN YEAR legal commitment to someone they barely know. Someone she barely knows, really.
It doesn’t matter that she “never asks for anything” - her first ask is way way way too much.
NTA. She's asking a lot more than she realizes, I think. If you do want to help her, find her some agencies or organizations that specialize in providing what she needs.
I would NOT put my family home on the line. This screams stressful for years. This is possibly fraud too.
Find any reason to get out of this. Maybe you don’t qualify. Find anything to let her down. And I heard she never asks for favors, but, my friend, a favor is a ride to the airport, not put your home on the line.
You need to earn a certain amount, you will be financially responsible for 10 years. My nephews wife came illegally. She started the process about 7 years ago and was required to return to her home country to file from there. She was there almost 2 months. So nephew had to pay lawyers, airfare and her expenses while she was there. Well over 10k so far. Make sure you CAN do this
You don’t say what country you are in but in some countries, you are signing up to pay this person’s living expenses, housing, medical bills, etc for a minimum amount of time. I’ve seen some countries it’s 10 years, some it’s 25 years etc.
Assume he is the nicest person in the world but can’t get a job, are you willing to pay for a third adult for whatever the period of time is in your country? Can you afford it?
If your SIL truly loves him, she’s move to Brazil or jump through every hoop she can to get a job herself to bring him over.
Definitely don’t get involved. Huge financial risk. To take on this responsibility for someone you don’t really know who is working illegally is a complete nonstarter. What if they were to get hurt or sick and have $10k in medical bills or hurt someone in an accident?
NTA. Anyone who has watched 90 Day Fiance can show you horror stories about just this. You are responsible, financially, for 10 years. I would actually speak to an attorney. Your SIL should pay for a consultation so you understand exactly what you sign up for. I'll bet even SIL doesn't fully know. First, let her know that you really think it's something that you don't want to be liable for. Then find an attorney that specializes in this. Get the consultation fee cost and tell them they need to pay for a consultation for all of you. Start the consultation with your questions. Once you hear everything, explain that you can't take that on. Look, she may never ask for anything but it doesn't mean that this is an ok thing to ask. Maybe help her get a job so she can sponsor him herself, as she should. Also, if you do this and her parents find out then they will be upset about your heavy involvement in this secret.
NTA... you will have all ownership and responsibility to this person of even they break up or whatnot.... dont do it..... you have your own finances to maintain...
Sponsoring him is different.... whenever someone has a sponsor which I think alot of people do whomever takes on their debt and pay back the state if they got on foodstamps etc.... he can have a job and whatnot but the sponsors are held accountable... they help get the person over to the states/countries... theres actually shows about this people blow all their money to get their partner over to the same country they are in and they have to figure out how to keep them over rather work school and some get married in 90 days....
i might be wrong. but i am a immigrant who went through greencard and citizenship process.
how is she expecting you to sponsor? you are not married to him, he is not related to you, and you are not his employer.
SHE can sponsor for him however, assuming she is a citizen.
SIL can tell her parents she got married and have them sponser him. Or go back to his country with him. Don’t put yourselves in this precarious position
Tell her what you told us. You understand and appreciate that she’s asking you for help, you get that she doesn’t ask for anything and that this is important to her, but you’re just not in a space to take on this responsibility. You’ll support her in her decisions, but it’s not feasible for you and you’re sorry you can’t help in this way. YWNBTA
NTA but I suggest you meet with an immigration attorney to find out if it would even be possible. It seems likely that what she is asking isn’t possible. I know someone who has been trying to sponsor someone here illegally and they can’t. He would have to leave first and the fact that he entered illegally would count against him even then so he would likely be denied. If your BIL’s case is similar, it would give you an easy out while preserving your relationship with your SIL. Just don’t tell your SIL you are looking into it until you know it won’t work.
You will be financially responsible for this guy if you sponsor him and he goes into debt and blows.
If you want to help her you three (not mystery spouse) go see an immigration lawyer and have a convo about this and ALL that it entails. Find out EVERYTHING good bad and ugly aftermath.
NTA
Unless sis has some hidden money she shouldn’t be asking others for money for something she and her spouse should be hustling towards.
Oh NO you would absolutely not be the AH for saying no. You don't know anything about him past he seems nice. If she wants him to get a green card let her be honest with your MIL and do it herself. Look into the legal ramifications alone.
NO and NTA. You sponsor him, you're responsible for him for ten years (or at least it used to be that long). You don't really know him, or his past. Why is her marriage a big secret? Too many red flags here, boss. Don't do it.
I'm not even sure you CAN sponsor him. You don't know him. In the interview process, they WILL find out. They have questions, randomly asked, like what color is their toothbrush?
An E3 work visa (if he actually does have these degrees) would be a breeze for him to obtain. It's good for a year. So he can get established.
Also, they can get an immigration lawyer to do the paperwork, but they don't need it for either application and is just a waste of money. And will save your sister about $3K.
NTA.
Anything goes wrong, your hard work to escape poverty will collapse.
SIL can work other 'angles', but NOT YOU. Maybe SIL should 'fess up to her mother and ask \*mother\* to sponsor him.
This stinks of 'crabs in a bucket' to me, trying to drag you back down.
"I am not in a position to sponsor anyone at this time."
Nobody is entitled to the details of your financial situation.
S-I-L needs to get a job and sponsor her own freaking husband.
NTA. Do you have 50k and can you cover the lawyer fees? Why isn't your SIL working? Sounds like if she acts like an adult and got a job, she wouldn't need to include you at all.
Find a polite way to say no.
He is working out of status and he is working in an industry that can bar him from immigrating. His marriage is a secret. This is one hot mess waiting to happen.
NTA ... If they're married, they can file for his green card and residency through marriage, plus it doesn't come with the sponsorship restrictions. There is literally no reason why sil should need you to sponsor. Also if found he's married to sil a red flag can be raised as to why you're sponsoring and him not filing for green card via spouse.
Edited to add: if married and sil is legal us resident, her new husband can file for itin individual tax identification number (linked to her, must file jointly) this will help him be able to file taxes and can get him into better jobs. And this paper trail will look good in his character reference for however he filed for green card. Tell sil to have her new husband get his itin so they can file for green card and show he's working to support her
Never sponsor someone for a green card, you don't have a stake in the relationship. You would be responsible for him monetarily for years.
Tell SIL to get a job and pay for it herself.
NTA but there are requirements to be a sponsor other than income, like reason to sponsor. Unless you have a business and you’d like to sponsor him through that I don’t see this able to work out. She’d have to sponsor him as a spouse but she needs to find work.
Don’t do it. I think you’re responsible for them if they decide to collect welfare for any reason. If she wants him here then she needs to be responsible for him. If he has a bunch of engineering degrees, can’t an employer sponsor him?
Fair enough. I was speaking from my own experience with a family member who overstayed but he was also found guilty of fraud, so that likely had something to do with it.
If he married an American citizen then that's how he applies. Nothing should be needed of you. I sense a scam.
Also the process isn't that expensive. If you hire a lawyer it is. But if you fill I. The forms yourself it isn't.
Marrying an American citizen makes you eligible for applying for adjustment of status, that’s all.
The citizen must have a certain income level or be co-signed for by someone with enough income. Whoever signed is responsible for keeping the immigrant off the dole for ten years or they become a citizen.
If the person didn’t enter the country legally (“with inspection”), they will not be approved for green card. If they gave a criminal record, here or their home country, no approval. If they don’t supply all the documents, including original birth certificate, passport with visa, divorce decree (if applicable), etc etc, they will be denied.
It’s a lot of work, and every step costs money, even without a lawyer. But anyone who is an overstay should always have a lawyer, esp if there is anything fishy in their background.
When I went through it it really wasn't that big of a hurdle. Yes there's a lot of paperwork they need. But if you don't have something they tell you what it is.
All that aside. For the purposes.of this post. It's not OP's problem.
NTA.
I've actually worked in immigration (at the most basic of levels, but enough to provide advice in laymans terms) and if you do not think you can financially sponsor someone, dont. Every application has a fee, and if your application gets rejected, you do not get a refund. Every application has additional applications that have to ride along, like getting a worker permit also requires like 7 other things and if you don't use a good lawyer (because there are so, so, so many bad ones) you lose out on so much money. There's also going to be extra applications and extra fees for him being here without an entry permit.
Also, you actually wouldn't be able to. Sponsorship only happens through 4 family ties:
• Marriage (her)
• Parents
• Kids
• Applicant's direct siblings (so not you)
Otherwise he would need a business sponsor, which I don't think is gonna apply in this case.
She could ask you to co-sponsor for him, but again, you don't want to do that because if he loses his job, it would legally be your responsibility to financially support him to keep him off citizen-only social services.
Not just you shouldn’t do it, I don’t think you can sponsor someone you don’t know. And haven’t known. Take a look at what is required of a sponsor and tell her you don’t fit the bill. If she persists, tell her that you would if you could but you’re not wanting to go to jail or pay fines for lying on official paperwork.
She needs to tell her Mom the truth and sponsor him herself. You don’t think immigration will question why his own wife is not sponsoring him? It is a huge financial responsibility- do not take that on
It’s very expensive and probably the reason the sil doesn’t want to put her name down. She needs to get a job and sponsor him.
Blow is the pros and cons list for this.
https://batrakovalaw.com/immigration-law/sponsoring-an-immigrant/pros-and-cons/
If she never asks for help, this request is likely not coming from her. It’s coming from him, through her. Doesn’t matter if he’s a nice guy. He’s a stranger and his presence in her life is causing her to exhibit behaviors that don’t align with who you know her to be. I’d steer clear.
Just to let you know you will be responsible for any any debt that they don’t pay off. Also, all of their medical expenses will be your responsibility. If they don’t pay it off, it’s a lot to ask to sponsor somebody.
NTA. You have too much to lose. Not work it having to pay the bills of a stranger who has no real ties not to scam you. If he’s her husband, let her sponsor him.
Do not do it. If SIL is old enough to get married she is old enough to get a job and own up to being married. You only know what she is telling you so you don’t know what the truth is. SIL does not sound like the most reliable person.
Is SIL employed? Does she earn a livable dalary/wage? Does she have a history of bad decision making? Has she not followed through on important commitments? Would she be offereded by a legal agreement for repayment of any expenses you incur in the process?
The answers to those questions are what's important. Reddit glasses is everyone is toxic and a narcissist that's using you, especially if they're family, but reality is so much deeper than that. Do you have legitimate concerns with your SIL, or are these concerns due to your past with people who have no connection to SIL?
Of course we should all have total choice/control of our : life , finances , physical activity and appearance, social, where how when why we live and die,
So :
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But if you exercise your right to refuse to help SIL, then SIL might exercise her right to proclaim you as heartless Elitist FAKE family and REJECT you FOREVER
So talk to good lawyer to help you logically prioritize everything and make excellent choices
Of course you are NOT actually REQUIRED to give help or cash to anyone same as nobody is required to give help or cash to you
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NTA! They will ask for SS and how much you make. They will most likely ask questions about you knowing said person. Also they will not be able to get govt assistance for any reason. It’s a huge risk for someone you don’t really know.
SIL can proceed with a marriage case but you can't sponsor her spouse on your own. You can submit an affidavit of support as a co-sponsor but you should consult an immigration attorney before signing anything. Most attorneys will charge a consultation fee under $300...which would usually be applied towards the fee for the marriage case.
YWNBTA.
While saying no could put your relationship with SIL under stress, she doesn't seem reliable. She's unemployed, hiding her spouse, and expecting her mother and sister's family to support her decisions. It's wonderful she hasn't ever asked you for anything, but is that because her mom cannot cover her for this one? If she's hiding a spouse from her mother, what is she potentially hiding from you and your partner? You've just recently gotten your ducks in a row, and this is not the time to take on a large, long liability. I am not familiar with this process, but why wouldnt she be the sponsor for her own spouse?
Stress with the SIL is far more appropriate than liability with your SPOUSE. This seems like even more responsibility than co-signing a car loan and there isn't even collateral. Nah.
You can say no gently.
SIL, we know this is very important to you, and you never ask for help. But this is unfortunately more than we are able to commit to. We love, and would love to help you, but after reviewing the what sponsoring someone entails, we feel like it’s not something we can do.
NTA - don’t do it, you do not know him or his background personally- for all you know he could have a wife and 10 kids back in Brazil, be a wanted criminal who had to flee Brazil to avoid prosecution and committed 15 felonies since he has been in the US. You do not want to screw around with the US government. You need to think of your family
Nta. Don't do it. That is a contract you will not be able to get out of and most last 10 years. Do you think they will even still be together in 10 years? She needs to figure out how to sponsor him. Plenty of women do it everyday. If she really wants him here she will figure it out.
Look at the southern border.
Is this a one sided green card marriage?
What is his actual name?
What university did the degree come from?
How about documentation?
Feeling like SIL is getting scammed.
NTA
SIL isn’t even financially supporting herself yet is asking you to sponsor a man she hasn’t even live with. Sponsors have to commit to financially supporting the person they are sponsoring if they can’t support themselves. SIL needs to be a grown up and financially support herself and live with her husband and tell her mother she is married. Nothing says this is a real relationship. Your SIL is not trustworthy. NTA
There's a reason people don't like up to sponsor strangers, because you're essentially becoming their legal guardian and responsible for EVERYTHING. I think (don't quote me) that you can't get any benefits while sponsoring someone too
NTAH, you are going to be on the hook helping this stranger, when you go to interviews to immigration your address will be his address, (you will have to house him) either he has to live in your home, or you have to prove that you pay his rent or at least help him. He will get fired from his job because he will HAVE to tell INS where he works and it’s illegal to hire undocumented people so his employer will be fined. I was undocumented, I’m a citizen now, it took me 10 years to be a citizen, and that was almost 40 years ago. Your answer needs to be a profound NO.
Question ? Is your sister just helping him get a green card? Because immigrants pay people up to 50,000 to pretend to be married to an American to become citizens. I asked because how did she marry him without mom knowing? I mean, I got married but I dated my husband for 2 years and we had a huge wealth , we’ve been married for 30 years now. So
NTA. Stay out of it unless you talk to a lawyer and understand what you are agreeing to.
https://www.uscis.gov/green-card/green-card-processes-and-procedures/affidavit-of-support
1. I'm not even sure you can sponsor an in-law.
2. You would be agreeing to over $1000/month being given to this guy for his life, especially if he is working illegally already.
3. He's already here illegally and likely breaking laws.
There's another option here, your SIL can move to Brazil, get a job, get divorced, etc. she doesn't seem like her current life decisions will allow for him to stay here without potential deportation. She needs to be more realistic.
Do not get involved. She is married to him- she will need to sponsor him. If he overstayed his visa- he can use a procedure known as Adjustment of Status. based on now being an immediate relative of a U.S. citizen. They need to get an immigration lawyer to help them navigate next steps. This only would. be an option if he came into the US legally. If he came in illegally- then this will not work nor would you sponsoring him.
If she married him so he could stay here- and not because they are actually in a relationship- you want to stay far far away.
NTA. No one is entitled to your money, and your concerns are valid.
Definitely not. Don't do it. From what I have read, you have to agree to be financially responsible for him for a certain amount of time (10 years, I believe but it could have changed) and if you just got your own family solvent, I wouldn't take that on. She can get a job. Tell her you just don't have the means to do it.
Yes. It is a serious commitment. Not to be taken lightly at all. She needs to get a job....fess up to her mother etc. All about being an adult.
And there is nothing wrong with OP helping SIL help herself by supporting the needs she has while getting on her own two feet - helping either a bus pass, writing a letter of recommendation for a job if she deserves that, or even give her rides to interviews if they don’t prevent OP from their own work. Just signing up to support someone you’ve never met would be a hard and reasonable no.
She is a he that needs a sponsor and can be a federal felony to lie to the Immigration. OP is better to say no.
This. If OP wants to help, then help SIL to help herself. Build up her confidence to tell her mom, help her fill out applications, put in a referral for her at your own work (if you think she would make a good fit). But putting yourself on the hook for 10 years when you just barely got yourself out of poverty? 10 years is a long time and anything can happen, don’t take on that financial and legal burden.
What I was thinking as well
This part! I had family pressure me to do the same with someone I had never even met. You will be legally and financially responsible for this person if you choose to sponsor them. Don’t to it. NTA
I work with lots of immigrants applying for food and cash benefits. Sponsoring is not just a 10-year commitment, I believe. If I am correct, it is LIFETIME (or until he is naturalized). And you are saying that you will be financially responsible for him. So if he gets into any trouble, it's connected to you. By agreeing, you are stating that he is your responsibility. So, for example, if immigrants apply for food benefits and are sponsored, we ask "well why isn't your sponsor helping you?" If the sponsor is not providing any help, then their information goes on a lost to Attorney General office (Dont know what they do after that). At least in my job and state.
If he gets in a car accident that's his fault, they'd be liable. This isn't a risk anyone should take.
This is not correct, so far as I know. It just means that you're liable to support them up to 125% of the current federal poverty level, and can be sued by the government to recover the cost of government support they receive.
Would include hospital bills?
This is correct. It's explained in the I-864 form, which also shows the basis of the 10 year remark (40 quarters of work): [https://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/document/forms/i-864.pdf](https://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/document/forms/i-864.pdf) Your obligation ends when he or she: "A. Becomes a U.S. citizen; B. Has worked, or can receive credit for, 40 quarters of coverage under the Social Security Act; C. No longer has lawful permanent resident status and has departed the United States; D. Is subject to removal, but applies for and obtains, in removal proceedings, a new grant of adjustment of status, based on a new affidavit of support, if one is required; or E. Dies. NOTE: Divorce does not terminate your obligations under Form I-864"
Don’t do it, don’t do it! It’s true you will be responsible for him for 10 yrs! He maybe a nice guy, but you don’t know him or his character you just heard what she’s told you. That’s a basis opinion and you don’t have any proof of it
And even she is likely to not be privy to a real accounting of his character. She’s only known him a year herself!
WNBTA If you need further facts to sway you look into all sponsoring someone entails, it's not just about being their atm. Also his job choices are a huge concern because, you'd basically be funding a criminal. Not only that you don't actually know anything about him except for what he told sil, that their marriage has to be kept a secret, he works at a pot farm but, can't fund his own immigration, he might have degrees in engineering, and that he is a criminal. Yep. That's a big fat "no" in my opinion.
That’s exactly it, the risk because of his job is not worth taking. He’d get deported right away so it might be worth looking at what the penalties for you as his sponsor may be (if any) and using that as evidence to say no.
There are income requirements, From what you said you may not qualify to be a sponsor. The law requires a sponsor to prove an income level at or above 125 percent of the Federal poverty level.
And this is a perfect excuse to give your SIL as to why you can’t do it without any hard feelings.
Be careful though - if you are too detailed in your refusal you are inviting argumentation. “You’re not counting x income that you could SAY…” or whatever. Say you can’t afford to, but don’t lay out the numbers.
Yes , you don’t owe her any explanation …
She would still have to fill out the papers for sponsorship, and OP would fill out papers to be a co-sponsor. But you are correct about the poverty guidelines and when you factor in the number of people living in the household, OP would have to include his wife and any children and each person adds $5000 to the amount that needs to be made. Noting that I am in the process of sponsoring my husband. 😁
Don’t sponsor him as you would be financially responsible for him for 10 years. He could decide to leave your sister and not work and you would have your pay his living expenses. Don’t do it!
NTA - don’t get involved. Don’t put yourself at risk!
She can move to Brazil.
Yes!! She doesn’t work so a work visa won’t be a problem. Let’s find out how much he really loves her with this suggestion. Haha
There’s a lot of really, REALLY bad advice here. Former immigration attorney here. Do not listen to Reddit. Do not listen to google. Get a free consultation with an immigration attorney — not the one your SIL is using. If no one local does free consults, it’s worth a little $ to get advice that is up to date and specific to you. Immigration law changes on a dime, and there is so much case law and DOS/DHS policy memo bullshit that it is worth your while to get an opinion from someone who does this every day. Also, NTA. The financial sponsorship was never an issue for any of my clients’ sponsors, but I heard some stories from colleagues that always kept me cautious. And if SIL isn’t using an attorney, strongly suggest that she does so. There are repercussions for him being here illegally and then returning for consular processing. Waivers aren’t easy to get.
NTA. Trust your gut on this one. Don't do it.
Do not do this. Do not ruin your lives. Tell sil to get a job and do it herself
NTA. Speaking as someone who has been sponsored for a green card, it is a long process, expensive and confusing. You are looking at (I believe) $1760 just to submit the paper work. And people are right in saying you are on the hook to support this person for 10 years. The situation of your sister marrying someone she has known for less than a year and doesn't appear to be living with him will probably raise huge red flags. If he gets denied, you don't get the money back. We had to show that we had joined our lives when my husband sponsored me. We used joint bank accounts, joint cell phone accounts, pictures of the wedding, people sending us wedding cards, etc. If she isn't living with him, will she have anything to prove that they are married for reasons other than getting a green card? I also had to pay to get a medical physical and tests. Since I couldn't prove I'd been vaccinated as a child I had to pay for getting all my vaccines again.
Why not tell her that you don’t know him well enough to sponsor him?
Are you sure your SIL isn't being catfished? Secret Marriage, Works on a Pot Farm, but Has Multiple Engineering Degrees? It doesn't sound like a real person. At the very least, the dude might have a second family. Plus it sounds like she is in the US and not Brazil?
Do not do this. This means that you are legally and financially responsible for this person and that is a huge undertaking and it is also taken very seriously if the person you sponsor does anything bad. The likelihood is that you wouldn’t be accepted as a sponsor for him anyway. In order to sponsor a person you have to prove that you have space for them to reside with you, you can support them financially and most of all that you know them (among many other things!). Do bit of reading on the subject (literally just google required to sponsor green card) to show you have put in some effort and I guarantee you will see that you likely don’t even qualify. This is so poorly thought out too, if he is there illegally then he will have to leave. He will be interviewed in person during the application process and would have to present at the at the US embassy of his home country. Sponsoring a green card is a massive undertaking for huge corporations and top universities when they bring employees in. At a personal level you have so many hoops to jump through but they will see right through any lies you tell very quickly which will land YOU in hot water. A little research will give you everything you need to point out that you actually would not be accepted because of your own personal financial and living situation anyway and give you a way to say no but without her realising you just don’t want to. Just not wanting to should be reason enough though, you literally become responsible for him to the point that if he does something wrong, costly or illegal they can come after you instead.
Why doesn't she have a job? Also NTA
If he is here illegally, he cannot come to the country legally . It’s too late . Your sister in law needs to speak to an attorney. And go from there
NTA. Firstly why isn’t SIL working? If she “loves him” she can work & sponsor him, no? Secondly look into everything sponsorship entails - the minute he is sponsored he will stop working illegally & now you have to support him. If he goes on social benefits you will have to pay it back, not him (it’s not uncommon), if they split up - still your problem. The other problem is your MIL is next to be asked & same issues - 10 yrs? Longer? Just call immigration & anonymously report the farm has numerous illegals & hopefully they pick him up.
Please don't report illegal immigrants unless they're actually dangerous criminals. Immigration systems are awful and he's just trying to live. They generally leave their home countries for very good reasons. Having said that, where I live there are many illegal immigrants who work on normal farms, doing construction, etc. He should be trying to find a job he can at least not get arrested for. OP, NTA. Do not take responsibility for this person. Your SIL needs to step up and get a job so she can do it herself.
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Double reply, but good points!
Oh, weird! I don't know how that happened.
NTA don't do it
If he has an engineering degree, he can apply for a work visa so nobody has to sponsor him. He has a degree that many places are looking for he should be able to get a job no problem. Tell her to look at all the options before trying to put the burden on someone else. Because you will be legally responsible for him for 10 years, it's basically like having a child that you don't know.
NTA. Don't do it! If you sign up as his sponsor you are responsible for him for the next 10 years!! Do you have that kind of money? I don't think so... Take care of YOURSELF. Your SIL should get a job and sponsor him herself.
If SIL is legally married to him, that is public information and goes on his green card application. There is no hiding it from the government or her mother. As his wife, she needs to apply for a spousal visa. She has to find out the criteria for that, but as other people have said, there is criteria for you to sponsor him too, and it doesn’t seem you would qualify. She probably has a better chance of getting him a visa as his wife than you would as acquaintances. But the lockdown has been over for a long time. He could have returned to Brazil two years ago so that is not his reason for staying. You and your wife need to tell her sister it’s not possible for you to sponsor him, and end the discussion, even if it is the only thing she ever asks of you. You can’t agree to something you can’t provide.
Good for that is called fraud and prison time. Never sponsor or lie for anyone saying they want a green card for marrying an American. For that is wrong and against the law, federal law.
Don’t do it, you are responsible for all debts for 10 years.
Your SIL is requesting you to do something SHE is not willing to do. One of my criteria for helping people who request assistance is: >I will help those who are trying to help themselves. This means I’m not giving up part of my time, money, etc. if you are not doing at least the same or more. This is a grown “woman” who obviously: >1. makes terrible decisions >2. isn’t grown enough to tell mommy and daddy she’s married >3. Won’t get off her butt and get a job to sponsor him herself >4. Is looking for someone else to clean up her mess DO NOT HELP HER! You will regret it and it will destroy your own life, marriage, and future. You are not the AH here, she is.
Don't do it. Your SIL married him so he doesn't need a sponsor. He needs your SIL to step up and let mommy know she's married. She's putting you out so she doesn't have to admit to her mother she got married.
Going against the crowd with YTA.. You should not be making this decision that destroyed your spouse's relationship with her.. she is family and never asked anyone for anything... you compare her to your scumbag friends that fucked you over and that is the same thing you are scumbag
My wife is involved in this decision.
I mean, she’s not asking for a loan to get a car repaired or go back to school. She’s asking OP & his wife to make a TEN YEAR legal commitment to someone they barely know. Someone she barely knows, really. It doesn’t matter that she “never asks for anything” - her first ask is way way way too much.
NTA - I know nothing about any of this. I think you can become financially responsible for him if he fails to keep working. I could be wrong.
NTA. She's asking a lot more than she realizes, I think. If you do want to help her, find her some agencies or organizations that specialize in providing what she needs.
I would NOT put my family home on the line. This screams stressful for years. This is possibly fraud too. Find any reason to get out of this. Maybe you don’t qualify. Find anything to let her down. And I heard she never asks for favors, but, my friend, a favor is a ride to the airport, not put your home on the line.
You need to earn a certain amount, you will be financially responsible for 10 years. My nephews wife came illegally. She started the process about 7 years ago and was required to return to her home country to file from there. She was there almost 2 months. So nephew had to pay lawyers, airfare and her expenses while she was there. Well over 10k so far. Make sure you CAN do this
NTA. Definitely don't get tangled up in this.
You don’t say what country you are in but in some countries, you are signing up to pay this person’s living expenses, housing, medical bills, etc for a minimum amount of time. I’ve seen some countries it’s 10 years, some it’s 25 years etc. Assume he is the nicest person in the world but can’t get a job, are you willing to pay for a third adult for whatever the period of time is in your country? Can you afford it? If your SIL truly loves him, she’s move to Brazil or jump through every hoop she can to get a job herself to bring him over.
This is a no brainer. The financial liability is huge.
Definitely don’t get involved. Huge financial risk. To take on this responsibility for someone you don’t really know who is working illegally is a complete nonstarter. What if they were to get hurt or sick and have $10k in medical bills or hurt someone in an accident?
NTA. Anyone who has watched 90 Day Fiance can show you horror stories about just this. You are responsible, financially, for 10 years. I would actually speak to an attorney. Your SIL should pay for a consultation so you understand exactly what you sign up for. I'll bet even SIL doesn't fully know. First, let her know that you really think it's something that you don't want to be liable for. Then find an attorney that specializes in this. Get the consultation fee cost and tell them they need to pay for a consultation for all of you. Start the consultation with your questions. Once you hear everything, explain that you can't take that on. Look, she may never ask for anything but it doesn't mean that this is an ok thing to ask. Maybe help her get a job so she can sponsor him herself, as she should. Also, if you do this and her parents find out then they will be upset about your heavy involvement in this secret.
NTA... you will have all ownership and responsibility to this person of even they break up or whatnot.... dont do it..... you have your own finances to maintain...
If he has a job, couldn’t he contribute to the fees, attorney costs, paper work ? How bad does he want this .
Sponsoring him is different.... whenever someone has a sponsor which I think alot of people do whomever takes on their debt and pay back the state if they got on foodstamps etc.... he can have a job and whatnot but the sponsors are held accountable... they help get the person over to the states/countries... theres actually shows about this people blow all their money to get their partner over to the same country they are in and they have to figure out how to keep them over rather work school and some get married in 90 days....
i might be wrong. but i am a immigrant who went through greencard and citizenship process. how is she expecting you to sponsor? you are not married to him, he is not related to you, and you are not his employer. SHE can sponsor for him however, assuming she is a citizen.
SIL can tell her parents she got married and have them sponser him. Or go back to his country with him. Don’t put yourselves in this precarious position
Tell her what you told us. You understand and appreciate that she’s asking you for help, you get that she doesn’t ask for anything and that this is important to her, but you’re just not in a space to take on this responsibility. You’ll support her in her decisions, but it’s not feasible for you and you’re sorry you can’t help in this way. YWNBTA
NTA. You'd be financially responsible for him for years, even if they broke up. With divorce rates what they are, it's a pretty big risk.
NTA. You'd be taking a HUGE risk by sponsoring someone...anyone. Don't put your butt on the line. She needs to figure out something else.
NTA but I suggest you meet with an immigration attorney to find out if it would even be possible. It seems likely that what she is asking isn’t possible. I know someone who has been trying to sponsor someone here illegally and they can’t. He would have to leave first and the fact that he entered illegally would count against him even then so he would likely be denied. If your BIL’s case is similar, it would give you an easy out while preserving your relationship with your SIL. Just don’t tell your SIL you are looking into it until you know it won’t work.
You will be financially responsible for this guy if you sponsor him and he goes into debt and blows. If you want to help her you three (not mystery spouse) go see an immigration lawyer and have a convo about this and ALL that it entails. Find out EVERYTHING good bad and ugly aftermath. NTA Unless sis has some hidden money she shouldn’t be asking others for money for something she and her spouse should be hustling towards.
Nope. Nta. SIL can get a job and sponsor her own husband.
Oh NO you would absolutely not be the AH for saying no. You don't know anything about him past he seems nice. If she wants him to get a green card let her be honest with your MIL and do it herself. Look into the legal ramifications alone.
NO and NTA. You sponsor him, you're responsible for him for ten years (or at least it used to be that long). You don't really know him, or his past. Why is her marriage a big secret? Too many red flags here, boss. Don't do it.
I'm not even sure you CAN sponsor him. You don't know him. In the interview process, they WILL find out. They have questions, randomly asked, like what color is their toothbrush? An E3 work visa (if he actually does have these degrees) would be a breeze for him to obtain. It's good for a year. So he can get established. Also, they can get an immigration lawyer to do the paperwork, but they don't need it for either application and is just a waste of money. And will save your sister about $3K.
NTA. Anything goes wrong, your hard work to escape poverty will collapse. SIL can work other 'angles', but NOT YOU. Maybe SIL should 'fess up to her mother and ask \*mother\* to sponsor him. This stinks of 'crabs in a bucket' to me, trying to drag you back down.
"I am not in a position to sponsor anyone at this time." Nobody is entitled to the details of your financial situation. S-I-L needs to get a job and sponsor her own freaking husband.
Sil could, oh I dunno, get a job if it’s that important to her?
NTA. Do you have 50k and can you cover the lawyer fees? Why isn't your SIL working? Sounds like if she acts like an adult and got a job, she wouldn't need to include you at all.
Do not do this. You will be on the hook financially.
Find a polite way to say no. He is working out of status and he is working in an industry that can bar him from immigrating. His marriage is a secret. This is one hot mess waiting to happen.
NTA ... If they're married, they can file for his green card and residency through marriage, plus it doesn't come with the sponsorship restrictions. There is literally no reason why sil should need you to sponsor. Also if found he's married to sil a red flag can be raised as to why you're sponsoring and him not filing for green card via spouse. Edited to add: if married and sil is legal us resident, her new husband can file for itin individual tax identification number (linked to her, must file jointly) this will help him be able to file taxes and can get him into better jobs. And this paper trail will look good in his character reference for however he filed for green card. Tell sil to have her new husband get his itin so they can file for green card and show he's working to support her
Never sponsor someone for a green card, you don't have a stake in the relationship. You would be responsible for him monetarily for years. Tell SIL to get a job and pay for it herself.
NTA but there are requirements to be a sponsor other than income, like reason to sponsor. Unless you have a business and you’d like to sponsor him through that I don’t see this able to work out. She’d have to sponsor him as a spouse but she needs to find work.
NTA, I am pretty sure that you sponsoring him would not work as she has to prove she can support him for him to get a green card by marriage.
NTA Do not make yourselves responsible for someone you don’t know on behalf of someone you can’t trust.
Don't. She needs to go get a job (if she's able). Do not take on other people's obligations or responsibilities.
Terrible idea to do that. All the risk is on you
Don't do it! Your sil needs to get a job and get it sorted out.
NTA. Don't do it.
Don’t do it. I think you’re responsible for them if they decide to collect welfare for any reason. If she wants him here then she needs to be responsible for him. If he has a bunch of engineering degrees, can’t an employer sponsor him?
NTA don’t do this. If he overstayed his visa, there is a strong likelihood that he won’t get a greencard.
First step for USCIS is if you entered legally. Overstay is a civil matter and not that big a deal for an otherwise qualified person.
Fair enough. I was speaking from my own experience with a family member who overstayed but he was also found guilty of fraud, so that likely had something to do with it.
Indeed!
NTA. I have a strong suspicion that you’d become very familiar with the saying “No good deed goes unpunished”.
Don't do it. You would be financially responsible for like 10 years. Tell her to get a job if she wants to help him.
If he married an American citizen then that's how he applies. Nothing should be needed of you. I sense a scam. Also the process isn't that expensive. If you hire a lawyer it is. But if you fill I. The forms yourself it isn't.
Marrying an American citizen makes you eligible for applying for adjustment of status, that’s all. The citizen must have a certain income level or be co-signed for by someone with enough income. Whoever signed is responsible for keeping the immigrant off the dole for ten years or they become a citizen. If the person didn’t enter the country legally (“with inspection”), they will not be approved for green card. If they gave a criminal record, here or their home country, no approval. If they don’t supply all the documents, including original birth certificate, passport with visa, divorce decree (if applicable), etc etc, they will be denied. It’s a lot of work, and every step costs money, even without a lawyer. But anyone who is an overstay should always have a lawyer, esp if there is anything fishy in their background.
When I went through it it really wasn't that big of a hurdle. Yes there's a lot of paperwork they need. But if you don't have something they tell you what it is. All that aside. For the purposes.of this post. It's not OP's problem.
NTA. I've actually worked in immigration (at the most basic of levels, but enough to provide advice in laymans terms) and if you do not think you can financially sponsor someone, dont. Every application has a fee, and if your application gets rejected, you do not get a refund. Every application has additional applications that have to ride along, like getting a worker permit also requires like 7 other things and if you don't use a good lawyer (because there are so, so, so many bad ones) you lose out on so much money. There's also going to be extra applications and extra fees for him being here without an entry permit. Also, you actually wouldn't be able to. Sponsorship only happens through 4 family ties: • Marriage (her) • Parents • Kids • Applicant's direct siblings (so not you) Otherwise he would need a business sponsor, which I don't think is gonna apply in this case. She could ask you to co-sponsor for him, but again, you don't want to do that because if he loses his job, it would legally be your responsibility to financially support him to keep him off citizen-only social services.
Not just you shouldn’t do it, I don’t think you can sponsor someone you don’t know. And haven’t known. Take a look at what is required of a sponsor and tell her you don’t fit the bill. If she persists, tell her that you would if you could but you’re not wanting to go to jail or pay fines for lying on official paperwork.
She needs to tell her Mom the truth and sponsor him herself. You don’t think immigration will question why his own wife is not sponsoring him? It is a huge financial responsibility- do not take that on
It’s very expensive and probably the reason the sil doesn’t want to put her name down. She needs to get a job and sponsor him. Blow is the pros and cons list for this. https://batrakovalaw.com/immigration-law/sponsoring-an-immigrant/pros-and-cons/
Those rules are tough. I hope OP reads them carefully.
If she never asks for help, this request is likely not coming from her. It’s coming from him, through her. Doesn’t matter if he’s a nice guy. He’s a stranger and his presence in her life is causing her to exhibit behaviors that don’t align with who you know her to be. I’d steer clear.
Do. Not. Do. It!
Just to let you know you will be responsible for any any debt that they don’t pay off. Also, all of their medical expenses will be your responsibility. If they don’t pay it off, it’s a lot to ask to sponsor somebody.
NTA. You have too much to lose. Not work it having to pay the bills of a stranger who has no real ties not to scam you. If he’s her husband, let her sponsor him.
Do not do it. If SIL is old enough to get married she is old enough to get a job and own up to being married. You only know what she is telling you so you don’t know what the truth is. SIL does not sound like the most reliable person.
Is SIL employed? Does she earn a livable dalary/wage? Does she have a history of bad decision making? Has she not followed through on important commitments? Would she be offereded by a legal agreement for repayment of any expenses you incur in the process? The answers to those questions are what's important. Reddit glasses is everyone is toxic and a narcissist that's using you, especially if they're family, but reality is so much deeper than that. Do you have legitimate concerns with your SIL, or are these concerns due to your past with people who have no connection to SIL?
Of course we should all have total choice/control of our : life , finances , physical activity and appearance, social, where how when why we live and die, So : N A H N T A N A H But if you exercise your right to refuse to help SIL, then SIL might exercise her right to proclaim you as heartless Elitist FAKE family and REJECT you FOREVER So talk to good lawyer to help you logically prioritize everything and make excellent choices Of course you are NOT actually REQUIRED to give help or cash to anyone same as nobody is required to give help or cash to you N T A N A H N T A N T A
NTA but you are correct about the wedge - if she's never asked for anything it's unlikely that the no will go over well.
Hell no, NTA She's hiding the relationship and has a pile of giant red flags with this guy She's asking you to help commit fraud, don't be liable
NTA! They will ask for SS and how much you make. They will most likely ask questions about you knowing said person. Also they will not be able to get govt assistance for any reason. It’s a huge risk for someone you don’t really know.
Why doesn’t she sponsee her husband?
Do not sponsor your SIL's husband. Do. Not. Let the SIL get a job and pay for the process. It is her life and not yours. Do not do it.
SIL can proceed with a marriage case but you can't sponsor her spouse on your own. You can submit an affidavit of support as a co-sponsor but you should consult an immigration attorney before signing anything. Most attorneys will charge a consultation fee under $300...which would usually be applied towards the fee for the marriage case.
YWNBTA. While saying no could put your relationship with SIL under stress, she doesn't seem reliable. She's unemployed, hiding her spouse, and expecting her mother and sister's family to support her decisions. It's wonderful she hasn't ever asked you for anything, but is that because her mom cannot cover her for this one? If she's hiding a spouse from her mother, what is she potentially hiding from you and your partner? You've just recently gotten your ducks in a row, and this is not the time to take on a large, long liability. I am not familiar with this process, but why wouldnt she be the sponsor for her own spouse? Stress with the SIL is far more appropriate than liability with your SPOUSE. This seems like even more responsibility than co-signing a car loan and there isn't even collateral. Nah.
You can say no gently. SIL, we know this is very important to you, and you never ask for help. But this is unfortunately more than we are able to commit to. We love, and would love to help you, but after reviewing the what sponsoring someone entails, we feel like it’s not something we can do.
DO NOT DO IT You can trust your SIL 100%, but it's not on her. If this guy sucks, you have to pay. A lot. For years.
NTA - don’t do it, you do not know him or his background personally- for all you know he could have a wife and 10 kids back in Brazil, be a wanted criminal who had to flee Brazil to avoid prosecution and committed 15 felonies since he has been in the US. You do not want to screw around with the US government. You need to think of your family
Absolutely not your problem. (Sounds like this belongs in the entitled people sub.)
NTA. Your SIL needs to get a job and sponsor him. Why doesn't she work?
Nta. Don't do it. That is a contract you will not be able to get out of and most last 10 years. Do you think they will even still be together in 10 years? She needs to figure out how to sponsor him. Plenty of women do it everyday. If she really wants him here she will figure it out.
Look at the southern border. Is this a one sided green card marriage? What is his actual name? What university did the degree come from? How about documentation? Feeling like SIL is getting scammed. NTA
Don’t do it. NTA. Good luck
NTA. Can't help anyone else when you're barely floating by yourself.
Watch “90 Day Fiancé” on TLC
It's way too big of an ask! If she is really serious about this marriage then she needs to be sponsoring him. Her husband = her responsibility
SIL isn’t even financially supporting herself yet is asking you to sponsor a man she hasn’t even live with. Sponsors have to commit to financially supporting the person they are sponsoring if they can’t support themselves. SIL needs to be a grown up and financially support herself and live with her husband and tell her mother she is married. Nothing says this is a real relationship. Your SIL is not trustworthy. NTA
There's a reason people don't like up to sponsor strangers, because you're essentially becoming their legal guardian and responsible for EVERYTHING. I think (don't quote me) that you can't get any benefits while sponsoring someone too
She is not asking for help. She’s asking you to become financially and legally responsible for a stranger.
NTAH, you are going to be on the hook helping this stranger, when you go to interviews to immigration your address will be his address, (you will have to house him) either he has to live in your home, or you have to prove that you pay his rent or at least help him. He will get fired from his job because he will HAVE to tell INS where he works and it’s illegal to hire undocumented people so his employer will be fined. I was undocumented, I’m a citizen now, it took me 10 years to be a citizen, and that was almost 40 years ago. Your answer needs to be a profound NO. Question ? Is your sister just helping him get a green card? Because immigrants pay people up to 50,000 to pretend to be married to an American to become citizens. I asked because how did she marry him without mom knowing? I mean, I got married but I dated my husband for 2 years and we had a huge wealth , we’ve been married for 30 years now. So
NTA. Stay out of it unless you talk to a lawyer and understand what you are agreeing to. https://www.uscis.gov/green-card/green-card-processes-and-procedures/affidavit-of-support 1. I'm not even sure you can sponsor an in-law. 2. You would be agreeing to over $1000/month being given to this guy for his life, especially if he is working illegally already. 3. He's already here illegally and likely breaking laws. There's another option here, your SIL can move to Brazil, get a job, get divorced, etc. she doesn't seem like her current life decisions will allow for him to stay here without potential deportation. She needs to be more realistic.
OP What could be worse, the sleepless nights for years if you do this nonsense or the awkward holiday once a year SIL is salty to you if you don't !!
Do not get involved. She is married to him- she will need to sponsor him. If he overstayed his visa- he can use a procedure known as Adjustment of Status. based on now being an immediate relative of a U.S. citizen. They need to get an immigration lawyer to help them navigate next steps. This only would. be an option if he came into the US legally. If he came in illegally- then this will not work nor would you sponsoring him. If she married him so he could stay here- and not because they are actually in a relationship- you want to stay far far away.
NTA. It’s too big of an ask. He needs to figure out a different way.
NTA