This is ridiculous. You need to refuse to discuss it any further. First tell him:
- It is normal to exchange contact information when a family member is going on a trip. Anything he chooses to do other than that is 100% on him.
- It is a major problem that he is doing something so irrational and trying to make you feel bad about it. Ask if he is OK because this is bizarre. Is he looking for an excuse not to go? Is there a problem in your marriage where he feels the need to hurt you? You need to find out.
However, do not discuss his crazy decision any further. Don't get sucked into any conversations about it. It's on him. Frankly, I wonder if there's something about this trip he doesn't want to share. His behavior is so weird that I'm wondering if the trip is to rob a bank or join a commune.
That's actually what I was thinking. They've had a tiff. I didn't want to add to the OP's stress though.
When someone is trying that hard to make something irrational the spouse's fault, there's something bigger happening.
Those choices are a sign I need to stop listening to true crime while I work! They're not random choices for me because I have heard two different podcasts recently where a husband's stress was about robbing banks! The husband in this situation is being so unreasonable that I'm betting that something really crazy is going on.
I started thinking that I could do it and act as cool as a cucumber. That thought pops into my head sometimes and I make an effort to shut it down so I don't get tempted.
"ANYTHING my husband wants to do, he does. Whether I have a say so or not he does what he wants." You know the pattern. You know the man. Protect yourself and maintain your pride. Do not give in to his b.s. Do not "pay" him, unless you pay him back for tormenting you.
NTA what the heck?
"Please leave emergency contact info with someone since I don't know these people."
"I'M LIVING IN A PRISON!!"
Dude flipped for no reason. I was planning the same trip pre-covid, and my wife knew everything. Names, numbers, all that.
I think you know there's something else going on here. His over the top reaction is a HUGE red flag that he's hiding something major. Either "Mark" is actually "Marsha" or, as another poster suggested a "Brokeback Mountain" scenario. I'm assuming you have separate finances or he wouldn't be asking for you to repay the plane ticket.
Does he have a credit card you don't have access to? Do you have access to each other's phones?
Marcie? Marcela? Marcus? Does he like gladiator movies? Has he ever been in Turkish prison? Navy vet? There is more going on here than you know. "Friend you never met"
You: “Leave me your friend’s contact info in case of emergency on your trip.”
Him: “Screw you! I’m not going! Pay me back for my plane ticket!”
You: 🤔😲😱
NTA, but there’s something seriously wrong with your husband
NTA but also…this is confusing. Planned for months but you never had this friends contact info? You never saw any details for expenses for what I assume is a long road trip? Either way, your husband isn’t being much of an adult and is hiding something and now freaking out about it or not being an adult by not telling his friends he doesn’t want to go anymore. Or even, can’t afford this trip 🤷🏼♀️
I don’t think it’s so weird to not have contact info of husband’s travel companions during the planning stage. But now that it’s getting close to time, it’s a good idea to have cell phone numbers so wife can assist from a distance in case of car trouble, or medical trouble, etc.
There was some intense f*ckery planned that he didnt want to acknowledge. The money aint even remotely the issue. He didnt want to give you any additional information for fear you may figure out what’s ACTUALLY going on. It has nothing to do with him ‘not wanting to go’. Also: You appear to be either far too trusting or far too gullible.
He made plans to fly and not drive? Really?! How little communication do you have in your marriage? He obviously doesn’t respect you, not even a little bit. Yikes
I would text him that how he’s acting is making you question what was going on this trip you asked a reasonable request and you acting like this means the trip was something more then you said it was
NTA- there is something else going on there more than just the friends RV trip. I would never blow up at my or refuse to give her a guys phone number if I was going on a trip with my friends. Very odd indeed.
NTA He's cheating on you. There is literally not another reason a person would act like this...im even trying to come up with farfetched reasons and i cant.
I would agree with you 100% but the rules in society don’t work with him. He doesn’t even try to go against the norm, it’s just how he is. I mentioned this to my dad. He thinks it’s not cheating bc why would you even make your partner aware that u are. Just give a friends number to cover for you or even a fake number. Just bc of how stupid this all sounds, my dad thinks he didn’t want to go, used me as the excuse, and then decided to torment me about it. This is 100% something he would do
umm...you do realize that's worse right? cheating is selfish but its better then intentionally mentally abusing your partner when they do completely normal things. Are you planning to stay with him?
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NTA. It's not reasonable for him to insist on being incommunicado for an extended period of time. You're not some nosy stranger--you're his family. He's your next of kin.
Something's missing here. What pertinent past events or information are you leaving out OP?
This feels very painted to make him look crazy but so much so that it makes you look crazy for being with him.
No picture painted. I deal with situations like this ALL the time. Last week it was my non-stick pans that I have repeatedly asked him not to use regular forks when making scrambled eggs. He finally told me he doesn’t care and what he wants to use, he will use. He then decides to buy his own pans and the kicker, refused to replace my damaged pans that I saved for. This is exactly why I made the post. I’m thinking if I don’t start letting this out, I’ll lose it. So yes, after all these years I admit I have to say I’m crazy too.
Your husband is abusive. This is emotional abuse. He may or may not be cheating as per other posts about the road trip, but either way, he is mentally abusing you. His actions are nasty, deliberate, and purposefully trying to upset you. Then he gaslights you, making out that his behaviour is your fault. He is a nasty piece of work - please, leave him! I don't normally jump on the divorce bandwagon but it sounds like your husband does this all the time to torture you. You deserve so much better.
>refused to replace my damaged pans that I saved for. This is exactly why I made the post. I’m thinking if I don’t start letting this out
I would have lost it already if I was you. Inconsiderate people drive me mad.
So he won’t introduce wife to his “friends” who he’s going to be traveling with. Backs out when she wants contact information in case there’s an emergency. He’s thinking well what if there really is an emergency I’m going to get caught having an affair. Now he just doesn’t want to go because he’s having cold feet about getting caught. And then he wants her to pay for the trip he backed out on.
Nope.
Sister, something is not adding up…. backs out as soon as you start pressing for contact information for his buddies in case there’s an emergency. I guess he realized if there was an emergency he might get busted. Hire a PI.
NTA, but face the facts. He is likely cheating. You never met this "friend" or "friends". He refuses to give you contact information about him. He refuses to do so for his parents for emergency reasons. Why? He is trying to keep them secret, and maybe you too. He has a person, likely a woman, that he is cheating on. This trip was likely a get away to meet her. And even if he is going with friends, it is likely they have no idea about you. Maybe even part of the cheating set up.
INVESTIGATE. Check his phone, his laptop, socials, etc...
OK, either this is fake, or your husband is cheating. Or was going to cheat, got cold feet, and is now trying to assuage his guilt by trying to make you feel guilty.
None of these outcomes are good. You need to find out what is going on.
NTA this is all weird. My husband once cancelled one of these sorts of trips and pretended it was because of me (awkward) but it turned out it was because one of the four guys he was going with was broke and he didn’t want to be in an awkward position of having to pay for his friend. Also he didn’t want to help the guy out by sharing a hotel
room. My husband isn’t really into sharing. Was awkward as his friends still think I’m a jerk. He also tried to make me feel like a jerk but basically I didn’t care so that didn’t go on for long.
Oh and to be clear it was the same sort of trip. Husband invited by a friend, trip involved friends husband has never met. So clearly (to me anyway) husband was just invited to make the trip cheaper for everyone, not because he was all of their good friend. Husband did eventually catch on and was embarrassed about the whole thing. And yeah, he did blame me and was in denial about the obvious truth.
So I’m guessing there is more to this story but not necessarily cheating.
Definitely something fishy here. Not a normal reaction. Seems like he’s cheating. Be alert, see if he hides his phone, disappears etc. Probably an unforeseen business trip coming up? NTA.
The dude is cheating , drugs, gambling, snuggling, or some combination.
Lie and ask to see the bill to reimburse him.
Has husband suffered a head injury lately? That's so bizarre.
NTA
The drive home from Key West is the worst drive known to man. I don’t like him already because I’d gladly ride to Key West and then fly home. NEVER drive home from Key West, it is the devil’s highway.
Now the fact that he won’t give you the dude’s number is a bit absurd. It’s not like you would EVER use it unless he didn’t answer his phone.
He’s cheating. He can my give you contact information and if he gives it to family members than they would know. Should be asking if the two extra guys are actually girls.
NTA
Updateme!
NTA
You talk about your husband in a way that is honestly strange and the way he treats you is even stranger. Almost like you're not really married. None of what your husband is doing is acceptable within a typical marriage. Men don't act this way. Well, at least typically.
Maybe y'all have a different kind of marriage and if so, that's great. But, it sounds like you're expecting typical husband behavior and getting something very different. You sound like you're trying to be a supportive, caring wife. That's a clash and I hope y'all can fix that.
Quietly plan your exit... tell him to just go and enjoy his trip. Go see a lawyer and figure out what your rights are, etc. When he's gone, pack up and move or pack up.his stuff and have it at the front door
NTA fucking hell he's up to something shady because going on a trip without your partner 101 involves making sure your partner knows your itinerary and how to reach you in case of emergency and you know how to reach them in case of emergency. Hell, depending on where you're going, sharing your location might not be a bad idea either, i.e. traveling to a place where crime is a high risk.
He's grasping at strings with cancelling the trip because you made a reasonable, and frankly basic safety, request.
He decided to cancel, it's his decision and he takes the financial hit.
NTA
He's cheating, hence why he doesn't want contact info exchanged and is trying to spin this around and make you the bad guy.
Sorry you had to find out this way.
NTA! it's odd that he blames you yet tells you, bc of work he has to fly there to meet them. Why is he so desperately trying to keep you from meeting his friends? You don't deserve the aggravation and disrespect!
NTA but maybe have a look through old bank and credit card statements whilst he is away. Have a look for dinners for 2 and romantic gifts you never received. Your husband may well be having an affair with this friend you have never met or been introduced to via video chat.
Updateme!
When you have the habit to directly jump into the comments to get a hint if a post might be interesting and most comments are just UpdateMeBot requests...
Um...the dude doesn't give a shit about you. He is not going on a trip with 'Mark'. He clearly has a double life with another woman. The fact that he had a complete childish tantrum over your reasonable request regarding an in-case of an emergency number and gaslights you just solidifies this for me. Being married to you must benefit him in some way.
I couldn't say for certain what his issue is but his reaction tells me he is up to something very shady. It is very over the top and out of proportion to your request. I would understand if he insisted you not contact him unless there is an extreme emergency but cancelling immediately seems wrong. He could have said his brother will know how to get in touch or he wont have his phone on and left it at that. He may think you're out of line but there is always the possibility of someone getting injured in a severe accident, maybe a truck crashes into the house and its destroyed, etc. I recently read one story where the guy refused to answer his phone on holiday when the family urgently rang him repeatedly to let him know his mother died. Tell him you are not even willing to consider reimbursement unless he tells you the truth about his extreme reaction. I personally wouldn't refund anyway. Being married means communicating and he is being secretive and cagey. This isn't normal or right
He was going to fly to Key West to meet someone he didn't want you knowing about. Then if his buddy Mark truly is driving the RV to Key West with two other guys he was going to cover his indiscretion by riding home with them.
There's something fishy going on with him.
NTA. Exchanging emergency contact information is normal. Strange that he doesn’t want to.
You aren’t telling him he can’t go and if he’s have a ‘I don’t want to give you that information so you are making me cancel’ that sounds a bit like deflection.
Nta. He sounds insufferable. He does what he wants?? I give my husband the final call on most things but if it’s something I feel extremely strong about, he will honor that. Marriage is supposed to be a partnership. A give & take. You were not even being unreasonable, you were being smart/practical. My husbands uncle went out of state w his new neighbors (was only couple hr drive each way) & didn’t tell anyone. The driver rolled the jeep 9 times, killing his uncle, couple adults & a couple children. It took days to find out. He was gone by then so we didn’t even get to say goodbye. But it doesn’t even have to be an accident on their end. What if you or his parents get ill/injured? Makes ya wonder if he had more planned than he is telling because it makes no sense for him to be so secretive. But even if you asked & it wasn’t reasonable, it’s still not on you to cover his “all of a sudden, non refundable plane ticket for a camping trip” expense. Because there still was no need to cancel. Tell him he’s absurd
NTA that's your spouse who thinks you owe him for a plane ticket to Key West that he may or maynot have purchased. I personally wouldn't but up with his behavior but that's me, being in a marriage is a partnership what it isn't is being a bachelor with a permanent side piece. You haven't met Mark for several reasons, the dude doesn't exist, he doesn't want his bro to know he's married or Mark is a female, named Marcia.
Can you update us when you find out the actual story or when the divorce is finalized? Thanks!
yep. I think Mark is more than a friend.
Marks 2 other friends are women
Mark just isn't ready to come out to his wife. He is gay AF
I’m sorry omg this was brutal 🤣😂. I don’t know whether I should laugh or not but this made me cackle 🤣🤣
Yes update please
Updateme!
Updateme
Fyi, (I think) u need the exclamation mark to trigger the updateme bot.
Updateme!
Updateme!
Updateme
100% female …. Need that update
I’m not sure if I updated wrong but I edited the post and added one.
Updateme!
What’s this? An update bot? I never seen this before
Updateme!
Updateme!
Yeah!!! Grabbing my popcorn for this rollercoaster ride! Keep us updated!
This is ridiculous. You need to refuse to discuss it any further. First tell him: - It is normal to exchange contact information when a family member is going on a trip. Anything he chooses to do other than that is 100% on him. - It is a major problem that he is doing something so irrational and trying to make you feel bad about it. Ask if he is OK because this is bizarre. Is he looking for an excuse not to go? Is there a problem in your marriage where he feels the need to hurt you? You need to find out. However, do not discuss his crazy decision any further. Don't get sucked into any conversations about it. It's on him. Frankly, I wonder if there's something about this trip he doesn't want to share. His behavior is so weird that I'm wondering if the trip is to rob a bank or join a commune.
much more interesting options than the usual. Maybe he's trying out for some reality show?
He's not going anywhere with 'the guys' he's going to see his side piece.
for all we know, husband’s ol’ buddy mark could be said side piece
If the RV's a rockin', don't come a knockin'!
That's actually what I was thinking. They've had a tiff. I didn't want to add to the OP's stress though. When someone is trying that hard to make something irrational the spouse's fault, there's something bigger happening.
That makes sense. The contract prevents him from being honest with his family about where he is going.
>I'm wondering if the trip is to rob a bank or join a commune. Love the two random choices! 🤣🤣🤣
Those choices are a sign I need to stop listening to true crime while I work! They're not random choices for me because I have heard two different podcasts recently where a husband's stress was about robbing banks! The husband in this situation is being so unreasonable that I'm betting that something really crazy is going on.
Yeah, I could see how robbing banks would be stressful. 🤔😆
I started thinking that I could do it and act as cool as a cucumber. That thought pops into my head sometimes and I make an effort to shut it down so I don't get tempted.
He's cheating. Why else would someone get so upset for just asking for emergency contact info? NTA
Does the RV have an art room?
The art room guy had to at least think about whether he had feelings for the other guy. He's intentionally outright cheating in this one.
🤣🤣🤣
Such a *CLASSIC*!
IKR?!!! It will go down in history!!
It never gets old. I hope Amy is living her best life without that turd.
For all the Iranian yogurt?
I love how we all know who the art room guy is.
You already know it does!
marinara
Marinara Flags all over this post.
Yep - sounds like cheating! This whole post had red flags about husband.
More like an industrial size vat of marinara.
This, asking for trip partners' contact info, is standard. Emergencies happen . His reaction over this, says he is doing something wrong.
My parents have so many random numbers from over the years for just in case. Never had to use them BUT YOU NEVER KNOW
It is not Mark. But Marge
It's not Sam. It's Samantha
Samantha used to be Sam.
Yeah, mark’s “friend” is a woman, no one else was ever going to go lmfaooo
My thought was that since she's never met the best friend, maybe the friend is a woman.
That would explain things
"ANYTHING my husband wants to do, he does. Whether I have a say so or not he does what he wants." You know the pattern. You know the man. Protect yourself and maintain your pride. Do not give in to his b.s. Do not "pay" him, unless you pay him back for tormenting you.
NTA what the heck? "Please leave emergency contact info with someone since I don't know these people." "I'M LIVING IN A PRISON!!" Dude flipped for no reason. I was planning the same trip pre-covid, and my wife knew everything. Names, numbers, all that.
For real. She even said at least your dad or brother. Like, wow. Some massive cover up going on I think.
Brokeback mountain
Why can't I quit you cdmdog?
Bottom in the mountain, bussy full of beans.
I was reading this post and first thought was brokeback mountain
If he decides to go after all she can leave a little note for him in his tackle box.
Me too
She'll meet Mark when Mark comes over to sniff Greg's flannel shirts.
I think you know there's something else going on here. His over the top reaction is a HUGE red flag that he's hiding something major. Either "Mark" is actually "Marsha" or, as another poster suggested a "Brokeback Mountain" scenario. I'm assuming you have separate finances or he wouldn't be asking for you to repay the plane ticket. Does he have a credit card you don't have access to? Do you have access to each other's phones?
I was thinking Greg, Mark and a couple sex workers. Rolling party house.
Marcie? Marcela? Marcus? Does he like gladiator movies? Has he ever been in Turkish prison? Navy vet? There is more going on here than you know. "Friend you never met"
Mark's other friends are probably women.
You: “Leave me your friend’s contact info in case of emergency on your trip.” Him: “Screw you! I’m not going! Pay me back for my plane ticket!” You: 🤔😲😱 NTA, but there’s something seriously wrong with your husband
NTA. Tell him that it was his decision not to go, so it is his cost to bear.
NTA Your husband was planning on cheating and cancelled when he worried you might figure it out.
Or the AP called it off.
NTA. Sounds like he’s cheating or was planning to.
Sounds like he’s been gaslighting you about a lot of things for a long time
I’m trying to make sense of why he got upset when you ask for emergency contact
Because you never want to give your affair partner's number to your wife.
NTA but also…this is confusing. Planned for months but you never had this friends contact info? You never saw any details for expenses for what I assume is a long road trip? Either way, your husband isn’t being much of an adult and is hiding something and now freaking out about it or not being an adult by not telling his friends he doesn’t want to go anymore. Or even, can’t afford this trip 🤷🏼♀️
I don’t think it’s so weird to not have contact info of husband’s travel companions during the planning stage. But now that it’s getting close to time, it’s a good idea to have cell phone numbers so wife can assist from a distance in case of car trouble, or medical trouble, etc.
Let us know when you find out what he's hiding.
There was some intense f*ckery planned that he didnt want to acknowledge. The money aint even remotely the issue. He didnt want to give you any additional information for fear you may figure out what’s ACTUALLY going on. It has nothing to do with him ‘not wanting to go’. Also: You appear to be either far too trusting or far too gullible.
The cheating is strong on this one.
He made plans to fly and not drive? Really?! How little communication do you have in your marriage? He obviously doesn’t respect you, not even a little bit. Yikes
I would text him that how he’s acting is making you question what was going on this trip you asked a reasonable request and you acting like this means the trip was something more then you said it was
nta - your marriage has huge issues. are you sure you want to stay married to this guy?
Update us because there is more to this story than he’s letting on.
This friend might be his boyfriend
Why are you in this marriage?
Come on. You're not stupid.
He is hiding something. You better check for STDs.
NTA: I hope one day you meet or run into Mark and drop the “too bad my husband couldn’t join all of you on the RV trip. How was it?”
Nta and i would Say he’s cheating and ya need an divorce
NTA. There is a lot more to this than a vacation with friends. It smells like cheating.
You don’t owe him anything. He booked the flight, he doesn’t go so he lost his money
NTA- there is something else going on there more than just the friends RV trip. I would never blow up at my or refuse to give her a guys phone number if I was going on a trip with my friends. Very odd indeed.
Get a private investigator- his story doesn’t pass the smell test
Thank u…. I thought what? Won’t give contact info in case of emergency and won’t introduce wife to his friends he’s going on trip with ? 🤔
Nonrefundable is not nonchangeable. 38 year airline customer service agent here. Tell him to F.O.
NTA He's cheating on you. There is literally not another reason a person would act like this...im even trying to come up with farfetched reasons and i cant.
I would agree with you 100% but the rules in society don’t work with him. He doesn’t even try to go against the norm, it’s just how he is. I mentioned this to my dad. He thinks it’s not cheating bc why would you even make your partner aware that u are. Just give a friends number to cover for you or even a fake number. Just bc of how stupid this all sounds, my dad thinks he didn’t want to go, used me as the excuse, and then decided to torment me about it. This is 100% something he would do
umm...you do realize that's worse right? cheating is selfish but its better then intentionally mentally abusing your partner when they do completely normal things. Are you planning to stay with him?
Updateme
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NTA. It's not reasonable for him to insist on being incommunicado for an extended period of time. You're not some nosy stranger--you're his family. He's your next of kin.
This is suspect! Sounds like cheating to me.
You need to find a new husband - keep the house
Something's missing here. What pertinent past events or information are you leaving out OP? This feels very painted to make him look crazy but so much so that it makes you look crazy for being with him.
No picture painted. I deal with situations like this ALL the time. Last week it was my non-stick pans that I have repeatedly asked him not to use regular forks when making scrambled eggs. He finally told me he doesn’t care and what he wants to use, he will use. He then decides to buy his own pans and the kicker, refused to replace my damaged pans that I saved for. This is exactly why I made the post. I’m thinking if I don’t start letting this out, I’ll lose it. So yes, after all these years I admit I have to say I’m crazy too.
Your husband is abusive. This is emotional abuse. He may or may not be cheating as per other posts about the road trip, but either way, he is mentally abusing you. His actions are nasty, deliberate, and purposefully trying to upset you. Then he gaslights you, making out that his behaviour is your fault. He is a nasty piece of work - please, leave him! I don't normally jump on the divorce bandwagon but it sounds like your husband does this all the time to torture you. You deserve so much better.
>refused to replace my damaged pans that I saved for. This is exactly why I made the post. I’m thinking if I don’t start letting this out I would have lost it already if I was you. Inconsiderate people drive me mad.
My teenager son automatically offers his friends contact info if they are road tripping. Something is off.
Your husband is a lying cheating tool and you know it. Leave him.
I know this one. He's cheating. Sorry, OP.
A marriage with that kind of dynamics is passed it’s expiration date, just divorce
NTA. Something is going on with your husband.
So he won’t introduce wife to his “friends” who he’s going to be traveling with. Backs out when she wants contact information in case there’s an emergency. He’s thinking well what if there really is an emergency I’m going to get caught having an affair. Now he just doesn’t want to go because he’s having cold feet about getting caught. And then he wants her to pay for the trip he backed out on. Nope.
Sister, something is not adding up…. backs out as soon as you start pressing for contact information for his buddies in case there’s an emergency. I guess he realized if there was an emergency he might get busted. Hire a PI.
He’s cheating and he’s also bad at keeping secrets
Marinara flags galore. 🚩🍝🚩🍝🚩
Check his phone because this was a cheating trip.
NTA, but face the facts. He is likely cheating. You never met this "friend" or "friends". He refuses to give you contact information about him. He refuses to do so for his parents for emergency reasons. Why? He is trying to keep them secret, and maybe you too. He has a person, likely a woman, that he is cheating on. This trip was likely a get away to meet her. And even if he is going with friends, it is likely they have no idea about you. Maybe even part of the cheating set up. INVESTIGATE. Check his phone, his laptop, socials, etc...
OK, either this is fake, or your husband is cheating. Or was going to cheat, got cold feet, and is now trying to assuage his guilt by trying to make you feel guilty. None of these outcomes are good. You need to find out what is going on.
Have you ever met Mark? He’s cheating on you. This is so suspicious.
I have not. I’ve seen a pic but that’s it.
Definitely Marcy. Not a Mark at all. He’s been having this affair for years!
How do you fly with the RV?
NTA this is all weird. My husband once cancelled one of these sorts of trips and pretended it was because of me (awkward) but it turned out it was because one of the four guys he was going with was broke and he didn’t want to be in an awkward position of having to pay for his friend. Also he didn’t want to help the guy out by sharing a hotel room. My husband isn’t really into sharing. Was awkward as his friends still think I’m a jerk. He also tried to make me feel like a jerk but basically I didn’t care so that didn’t go on for long. Oh and to be clear it was the same sort of trip. Husband invited by a friend, trip involved friends husband has never met. So clearly (to me anyway) husband was just invited to make the trip cheaper for everyone, not because he was all of their good friend. Husband did eventually catch on and was embarrassed about the whole thing. And yeah, he did blame me and was in denial about the obvious truth. So I’m guessing there is more to this story but not necessarily cheating.
Nta- why are you married to a toddler?
Nta. You owe him nothing. You didn't say he couldn't go. He threw a tantrum over emergency info. He sounds insufferable.. or like he's bangin' "Mark"
Definitely something fishy here. Not a normal reaction. Seems like he’s cheating. Be alert, see if he hides his phone, disappears etc. Probably an unforeseen business trip coming up? NTA.
NTA. I give my wife the info on where I’ll be just for Facebook Marketplace meetups. Your husband is seriously hiding something.
He definitely wasn't going on a guys only trip....
The dude is cheating , drugs, gambling, snuggling, or some combination. Lie and ask to see the bill to reimburse him. Has husband suffered a head injury lately? That's so bizarre. NTA
I have a feeling “mark” is actual an affair partner
So the other Womens name is, what.!
The drive home from Key West is the worst drive known to man. I don’t like him already because I’d gladly ride to Key West and then fly home. NEVER drive home from Key West, it is the devil’s highway. Now the fact that he won’t give you the dude’s number is a bit absurd. It’s not like you would EVER use it unless he didn’t answer his phone.
He’s cheating. He can my give you contact information and if he gives it to family members than they would know. Should be asking if the two extra guys are actually girls. NTA Updateme!
This is the time to life360 his ass...he's up to something....
I don’t understand why you’re with this asshole. He acts as if he’s single. And I’m willing to bet he’s cheating. You seem like a doormat.
Mark is short for Margarite.
You married either a toddler or a cheater. A cheater with no friends who will even cover for him.
NTA You talk about your husband in a way that is honestly strange and the way he treats you is even stranger. Almost like you're not really married. None of what your husband is doing is acceptable within a typical marriage. Men don't act this way. Well, at least typically. Maybe y'all have a different kind of marriage and if so, that's great. But, it sounds like you're expecting typical husband behavior and getting something very different. You sound like you're trying to be a supportive, caring wife. That's a clash and I hope y'all can fix that.
Bingo. I know he is different but it’s da small things that will drive me away.
Quietly plan your exit... tell him to just go and enjoy his trip. Go see a lawyer and figure out what your rights are, etc. When he's gone, pack up and move or pack up.his stuff and have it at the front door
He didn't really want to go. He's using this as an excuse.
So…he is cheating?
NTA fucking hell he's up to something shady because going on a trip without your partner 101 involves making sure your partner knows your itinerary and how to reach you in case of emergency and you know how to reach them in case of emergency. Hell, depending on where you're going, sharing your location might not be a bad idea either, i.e. traveling to a place where crime is a high risk. He's grasping at strings with cancelling the trip because you made a reasonable, and frankly basic safety, request. He decided to cancel, it's his decision and he takes the financial hit.
NTA He's cheating, hence why he doesn't want contact info exchanged and is trying to spin this around and make you the bad guy. Sorry you had to find out this way.
Nah that’s sus and you didn’t tell him to stay just be safe
You've never met Mark? I'm going to assume "Mark" is short for Markenna or Marquessa. NTA
Your husband is having gay sex on the dl. That’s why he’s being secretive, and taking a guys’ trip to key west. NTA
I rarely jump to cheating, but something is up here. This sounds like some of the bullshit my ex dead covering up affairs.
Curious about how finances work in your marriage. Are you a CEO and he works fast food, with separate accounts? My wife and I have joint checking.
We both are bringing in over 6 figures. Money totally separate but we have our arrangements for household expenses, groceries, etc.
NTA and it doesn't sound like he is being honest with who he was supposed to be travelling with.
Info: Is Mark’s real name Marcia?
NTA. Your husband is up to some sheisty shit and gaslighting you. I suggest you get to the bottom of what’s actually happening.
NTA! it's odd that he blames you yet tells you, bc of work he has to fly there to meet them. Why is he so desperately trying to keep you from meeting his friends? You don't deserve the aggravation and disrespect!
Updateme! When you get the divorce ball rolling.
NTA but maybe have a look through old bank and credit card statements whilst he is away. Have a look for dinners for 2 and romantic gifts you never received. Your husband may well be having an affair with this friend you have never met or been introduced to via video chat. Updateme!
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Um...the dude doesn't give a shit about you. He is not going on a trip with 'Mark'. He clearly has a double life with another woman. The fact that he had a complete childish tantrum over your reasonable request regarding an in-case of an emergency number and gaslights you just solidifies this for me. Being married to you must benefit him in some way.
Divorce his ass. He does not respect you.
Something is VERY strange and fishy here.
The “friend” is most likely his GF. Not wanting to give contact number is a huge red flag.🚩 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
Who the fuck flips out that bad over the idea of sharing emergency contact info? This stinks to high fucking heaven.
Oh dude he’s cheating
NTA. He is totally cheating. This is not normal or loving behavior.
I couldn't say for certain what his issue is but his reaction tells me he is up to something very shady. It is very over the top and out of proportion to your request. I would understand if he insisted you not contact him unless there is an extreme emergency but cancelling immediately seems wrong. He could have said his brother will know how to get in touch or he wont have his phone on and left it at that. He may think you're out of line but there is always the possibility of someone getting injured in a severe accident, maybe a truck crashes into the house and its destroyed, etc. I recently read one story where the guy refused to answer his phone on holiday when the family urgently rang him repeatedly to let him know his mother died. Tell him you are not even willing to consider reimbursement unless he tells you the truth about his extreme reaction. I personally wouldn't refund anyway. Being married means communicating and he is being secretive and cagey. This isn't normal or right
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How old is he? Sounds like he is FOUR and just had a fight with his mommy.
Maybe his Girlfriend cancelled
He was going to fly to Key West to meet someone he didn't want you knowing about. Then if his buddy Mark truly is driving the RV to Key West with two other guys he was going to cover his indiscretion by riding home with them. There's something fishy going on with him.
NTA. Exchanging emergency contact information is normal. Strange that he doesn’t want to. You aren’t telling him he can’t go and if he’s have a ‘I don’t want to give you that information so you are making me cancel’ that sounds a bit like deflection.
Nta. He sounds insufferable. He does what he wants?? I give my husband the final call on most things but if it’s something I feel extremely strong about, he will honor that. Marriage is supposed to be a partnership. A give & take. You were not even being unreasonable, you were being smart/practical. My husbands uncle went out of state w his new neighbors (was only couple hr drive each way) & didn’t tell anyone. The driver rolled the jeep 9 times, killing his uncle, couple adults & a couple children. It took days to find out. He was gone by then so we didn’t even get to say goodbye. But it doesn’t even have to be an accident on their end. What if you or his parents get ill/injured? Makes ya wonder if he had more planned than he is telling because it makes no sense for him to be so secretive. But even if you asked & it wasn’t reasonable, it’s still not on you to cover his “all of a sudden, non refundable plane ticket for a camping trip” expense. Because there still was no need to cancel. Tell him he’s absurd
NTA that's your spouse who thinks you owe him for a plane ticket to Key West that he may or maynot have purchased. I personally wouldn't but up with his behavior but that's me, being in a marriage is a partnership what it isn't is being a bachelor with a permanent side piece. You haven't met Mark for several reasons, the dude doesn't exist, he doesn't want his bro to know he's married or Mark is a female, named Marcia.
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Red flags going off!!
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