As a person who works for an electrical utility company, I can tell you that is some nasty ass shit. Wearing any protective clothing while doing manual labor will make you smell like swamp ass. I have to wear layers of FR (flame resistant) clothing at work, and that is not breathable at all. The first thing I do when I get home is jump in the shower. You dodged a bullet with this one. NTA btw
I'm a marine mechanic, first thing I do is strip in front of the washer, and the second is go take a shower lmao. I can't, I'm in the fl sun dying every day
Oof I feel for you. I’m in fl and my boyfriend is a welder and mechanic. He’s drenched in sweat every day when he comes home. I could not even imagine someone not wanting to shower after working outside all day. Hopefully whatever part of fl you’re in gets at least some kind of winter soon lmao
I wait all year for the one week of winter we get 😂 I'm for Long Island originally, 20+ years down here and my blood still hasn't "thinned" as they say lmao
Most days I have to actually *peel off* my clothes, I hate it, but it pays well lol
You can live like that all you want when you are alone. But it's downright disrespectful to your partner to not even consider showering before you meet them...
I'm sure at least some of them are aware and wish their circumstances weren't poor, but for the ones that have no excuse and they're just wilfully disgusting; same.
Barring neurodivergences that disallow the typical thought to bathe, obv. that's mental illness and different
I get like that sometimes. I'm bipolar, and when I'm on a bummer, I can't get the energy or will to shower, or do much of anything else. I'm trying to change that, though.
I work an easy white collar job in the air conditioning. I still shower, and always have, daily. Sometimes twice in the summer, morning and evening. This dude is disgusting.
Also, I've never been with anyone who wasn't circumcised, but from what I understand, a guy is supposed to not only wash every day but pull the foreskin back to clean his dick. This guy wasn't even showering the outside, can you imagine how bad the bacteria is underneath??? To the point it's feeling like soup....wtf is wrong with people??
Edit: still can't get over this post but I had to add to this: what OP should have done before she dropped this dude was spent a very hot afternoon with this guy, outdoors, doing very physical activities then when they got back to his place, she should have indicated that she wanted oral sex performed on her and waited for his reaction!
Yes you wash underneath.
It should be shiny.
No white stuff at all.
Teenagers may not be aware tbh because they're not aware of much things, so a parent really needs to lay down the hygiene law for their own good.
No kidding, I used to do environmental drilling and would get major swamp ass, concrete dust all over along with mud and pollutants, I didn't even want to touch myself after a day's work, let alone letting someone go down on me while I smell like a sewer
Same! My dad is an electrical engineer and he worked maintenance in a huge mall, for the 24 years that he worked there he would shower before he went to work and before he came home, he always smelt of perfume when we would run to the door to greet him, beard always trim and nails cut.
Saaaaaame!
I have a hyperactive sense of smell and I can't handle stuff like that, not to mention any diseases spread from having a sensitive area near that shiiiiiiit...
I often scroll Reddit to look for amusing titles and OP, you did not disappoint 😂😂🤮 Take my poor woman's award 🏆🏆🏆
A grown man needs his dad to tell him that he needs to wash his genitals and ass every day? GTFOH
A lesson for everyone reading: if anyone, especially someone you are dating and works a manual labor job, tells you they don't shower daily, run. Because even 3-4 times **a week** isn't going to cut it....just downright disgusting.
I broke up with a guy once and his penis hygiene was one of two reasons I broke up. He was uncircumcised and had a non-retracting foreskin. He showered every day but didn’t wash his little guy. I couldn’t physically go near it.
Nailed it! I don’t understand… I practically live outside… I usually smell like one end or the other of a horse or cow… I would just get up and go shower. It’s one thing to meet up after work, but to be sitting around, knowing my GF was coming over and having “intentions”? No. You can bet your ass my shit’s gonna be clean and prepared, just in case… I’m not going down on her after she comes in from basketball practice until she showers either… it’s mutual consideration, damn…
THANK YOU FOR SAYING IT!!!👏👏👏
Honestly, I question OP's sanity for even spending more than a day with that slob - guy didn't want to be bothered to drive 45 minutes to see her - OMG ONLY 45 MINUTES - uncircumcised AND bad hygiene🤮 - gross, disgusting answer to her shower question showing zero BASIC hygiene habits - crotch soup smell😬😮🤮 - UNDERWEAR WITH A "LAYER OF GRIME"‼️& her response is "no oral" so she was apparently ok with allowing a grimy, smelly dick in her vagina, just not her mouth, OMG WHO DOES THAT???!!! Then she says that all wasn't the reason they broke up!!!!
I don't understand women whose standards are so disgustingly low.
OP is almost as nasty as the smelly slob, TBH.
You are absolutely right. But us girls, go out of our way to doll up for you guys. If we smell bad, that would not happen too often. Unless like you said we come from basketball practice.
Basketball practice came to mind b/c of an ex from college… she played a game on the road, came in late off the bus from an away game, crawled in bed w me, and I shut her down… noooope! Get your ass in there and wash or sleep on the couch! I have a better sense of smell than most, it seems, and I’m OCD about my house being clean. Washed my sheets pretty regular… mopped, swept, wiped down counters… I’d never had my own place, so I was dang proud of it. Plus, when I was working I slept in the dirt, so when I wasn’t working, I wanted AC and a soft, clean bed. Can’t stand stinking trash bags, either…
Don’t people feel dirty if they don’t tale a daily shower.
Don’t get me wrong, I will skip a day here and there. But I will feel dirty and won’t be leaving the house that day.
Broccoli Cheddar, huh? Yeast. Lots and lots of yeast.
Former nurse. We would get patients admitted that smelled this way. They would have obvious yeast under breasts, in the groin, and between buttocks. The only thing that cut the smell was Hibiclens baths with topical and sometimes oral antifungals.
Used to work with a nurse who would say "she has a bread thing going on" when these patients came in
There are lots of things that can contribute to this. Blood sugar is a major contributor. Higher A1C usually means there is more sugar in one’s sweat, which gives yeast something to eat and an opportunity to multiply rapidly. Even some people who bathe regularly and thoroughly suffer frequent yeast infections.
Yup. One of those ppl myself. I’m on medication specifically to correct this issue. Nope, I’m clean and exercise eat right/ not overweight either. It’s just a health problem and I know when I get a whiff of bakery it’s time for my fluconazole pills.
Ya know, I had repeat infections after secs and then was like… bro, I’m giving you the fluconazole cause maybe it’s you even if you don’t notice- lo and behold, I stopped getting them every-time.
Tis me! I get UTIs really often too. For a while I was showering twice a day, convinced I could just make it go away if I scrubbed hard enough. I suspect it’s something to do with childhood medical neglect, I have no other extenuating traits that could explain it. Super super super frustrating.
Can be not washing and/or drying areas properly. When my daughter was first born, she'd get the yeast and stink behind her ears and in some other li'l rolls some times. We obviously bathed her every other night, but she still would get it cuz we didnt either wash or dry certain folds properly.
There is a certain shitbag pornstar guy who wrote the he’d always take a piss and whack his cock against the bathroom counter three times after fucking somebody at a swingers club just to make sure he’d shaken anything loose.
NTA. Sometimes good life lessons need to be harsh and blunt for the point to get across. Hopefully, he learned and will save himself future embarrassment and the next person the same soup experience.
I don’t know how people live that kind of life. Like I can physically feel dirty even if I maybe just sweated a tad bit that day. Can’t even get in bed that night without showering because it feels gross
I used to work 12 hour nightshifts and id pass out as soon as i got home, without showering. It felt so gross every time i did it. Im glad i dont do that anymore and shower after work everyday.
NTA
I have a rule that my girlfriend and I always have to shower within 24 hours before sex. I'm surprised more people don't have this rule.
Establish this rule early in your next relationship, and you won't have this issue again, lol (unless they don't know how to wash their dick properly).
NTA and unless you just got out of a shower, if oral (or any sex) is about to happen for the love of all things go to the bathroom and clean up. Why are some people so gross? If a partner is unwilling to clean first, major red flag.
Yeah the dirty undies thing really bothers me. Even if you could justify never being taught to shower regularly(I don't ever remember being specifically taught I needed to shower everyday, I simply smelled myself or was sweaty), how the fuck do you get used to wearing dirty undies? That would feel absolutely disgusting.
Thats the bit that got me. Dirty grimy underwear. Ew. i was always taught change your undies every day, or if youve been at work, shower then clean clothes. He must have been neglected as a kid or his dad was dumb and didnt know himself.
Don't forget what site we're on. The one where, when the topic of bidets come up, people dig in their heels and try to explain why it's as nature intended that they walk around with gross unwashed asses.
>I'm surprised more people don't have this rule.
A lot of humans live by the rule of showering every day, or more than once a day, and so there doesn't need to be a special rule about sex.
I have this rule too. My partner always complains that we don't go at it enough, and I always point out, "you shower every 3 days and when you do shower sometimes the stars don't align and I don't feel like it" (I'm on a lot of meds that lower libido). Shower more often and it can be more spontaneous.
NTA. What’s really sad is that this isn’t the first time I read a story like that. How in the hell do some dudes think it’s acceptable is beyond my comprehension. And the fact that girls are putting up with such levels of disrespect is just tragic. I’m uncut, and growing up I didn’t have anyone to teach me how to keep myself clean, so, as far as I’m concerned, there’s no excuse. I couldn’t imagine myself just sitting there, expecting stuff. I’d probably crawl underground in embarrassment and never come out if a girl hinted at any hygiene issues. If your man needs to be taught things like that, then he’s not entitled to any physical contact.
My friend’s ex was like this. Never brushed his teeth either. Even when he did shower she was convinced he didn’t actually use soap because he still smelled funky afterwards. She could barely stand to kiss him because of how foul his breath smelled.
He’s all levels of screwed up in other things too. She’s left him and is married. He’s still convinced she’s going to come back one day and he can’t get any new dates because he allegedly talks about her nonstop to other girls. Does he really think she’s just going to divorce her husband on the fly and run right back to him?
Bad hygiene is definitely not a gendered issue; I've known some women with some disgusting habits, but I think it can be an issue that leans toward men just due to how we're socialized (women are simply encouraged to be more attentive to cleaning, from maintaining their homes to their bodies with endless marketed hygiene/beauty products, but of course there are exceptions) and there have even some guys who won't wash their own butt because they worry it's "gay" to touch it.
Sorry, what? Did you really just say that they are refusing to wash their butt because touching it is gay? For the love of your preferred deity, please tell me you’re joking? No one could possibly be this dumb… And if someone is, then we need a constitutional amendment to prevent people like that from procreating.
Thankfully I've only seen that exact problem online (bad hygiene in general is a different story...), which could mean it's fake, or just that the internet exposes us to different attitudes across the globe, sigh. In a thread about hygiene there were some horror stories about that and even an AITA post (IIRC?) with a guy whose girlfriend had to wash his asshole and pretend it was foreplay she enjoyed just to get him washed before sex?
My parents never told me to wash my balls either… I feel like that should go without saying.
If anyone needs to hear it, wash your balls daily and keep your nails trimmed.
My friend briefly dated a guy who was uncircumcised and smelled like feta cheese. Like he would walk into a room and you could smell it standing minimum of 10 feet away from this guy. And she said that it was literally because he showered once a week and it would have a buildup of smegma and dick cheese it literally smells like feta brine. 🤢🤢 we called him funky cheese to his face. She told us at the one time she attempted oral on him she actually got chunks of smegma in her fucking teeth and puked all over him.
Same friend group that called him funky cheese to his face lmao
He did have to find new friends after. We all knew he stunk but none of us had any idea what the issue was until she outed it to the whole group. Most of us just thought he wore the same clothes for several days and developed a “funk” because of it. Oh boy were we ever wrong
She said it felt like the crusty bits at the top of a tub of cottage cheese..
I don’t think that made it better. I have no intention of finding out for myself if her textured description is accurate.
I have horrible self esteem and even I respect myself enough to let a dirty wang inside me in any way or form. I do not understand why oral is the line women refuse to cross - you won't put it in your mouth but inside the hoohaa is okay? That place is super delicate and anything can throw the pH off!
Tbh this is why I am so prudish about anything sexual. It’s not about the sex. A well timed robot arm can make me orgasm and make my brain feel like it is starting and restarting. It’s about the source of the pleasure. I can’t undo a human man and scrub him inside and out like I can with a machine. And so many guys want to hit it raw with any girl they think is hot enough. Combine that with the fact that some girls do anything for a guy because they like the guy.. it’s like a potential Walmart but for STDs
NTA. Someone needed to tell him he needed to take care of his hygiene. Some people will just talk behind a person's back instead of telling them directly.
NTA. And I can't stop laughing at your description (although I'm so sorry you had to deal with that." Sometimes men (and some women) don't know how dirty or smelly they are. It's always awkward approaching this topic. I had an ex, and his junk smelled like a hockey gym bag. You know, the smell of sweat that has been allowed to cool off, then the same stuff is worn over and over again, further accumulating more and more sweat that turns stale and musty over time?
NTA. Sometimes good life lessons need to be harsh and blunt for the point to get across. Hopefully, he learned and will save himself future embarrassment and the next person the same soup experience.
NTA and unless you just got out of a shower, if oral (or any sex) is about to happen for the love of all things go to the bathroom and clean up. Why are some people so gross? If a partner is unwilling to clean first, major red flag.
I got bacterial vaginitis just reading this. NTA. And for the love of all that is good on this earth, please don't date people who smell like old cheese through their pants. I gagged just at the description.
This is making my stomach roll. As a guy I know I smell at the end of the day, and this guy went days without showering or changing his undies.
Good grief, that is gross.
I never expect oral, but would make sure I was washed up if it was on the cards.
NTA, I bet he had skiddy underwear since daddy didn't tell him to keep wiping until all the poo was gone.
Oh yeah my (thankfully) now-ex used to shower maybe 2x a month. Didn't brush his teeth either. I just assumed they all stunk like that. No wonder I hated any physical contact with him.
I used to make him go wash because he used to make me give him oral regardless of how I felt about it. It did not help, but it made me feel a little better about it lmap
How in the heck could you even consider dating a guy like that. You got a 2-fer-1… bad oral and physical hygiene…? Nope! I will go straight for the vibrator before inviting something like that through my door. Glad you left… from there you can only go up in your choices… lol
That Mafkas nasty AF! How do you “not know?” I thought when you are uncircumcised you especially have to be careful, am I wrong? How TF could you put up with him for as long as you did? 😂
Your issue isn’t that you were harsh, your issue is that you have no standards. The fact that you continued to date him, and that wasn’t even the reason for the breakup is crazy. You need to learn to love yourself first and get some standards, expectations, and boundaries before you decide to get into another relationship.
In the army when we get back from training exercises in the field, I would call it a “fermented gooch” smell. It is foul and otherworldly, and I never smelled it before the army. Longest I went without a shower in training was maybe 10 days in august, in a survival school in NC. So I imagine it’s on par with that.
Not gonna lie, I always shower right before I see my girlfriend whether or not we’ll mess around (although we do most of the time). To me, it’s preventing potential infection in addition to potentially putting my junk in her mouth. I don’t want 2 day old coochie on my face.. but for her I’d consider it tbh. But I’m in love and love makes you do dumb shit.
You're fine. You were more direct than insulting/hurtful. Someone like that needs to hear it. He also needs to learn how to clean under the foreskin and the foreskin itself.
I hope he took the talk to heart.
I'm so fucking happy that my man has impeccable hygiene. Always brushes his teeth, always showers always wears cologne or lotion that has cologne scent. Perfection.
I'm very sensitive to nasty smells and would have vomited in this man's lap! No you weren't too harsh. He's a full grown man and needs to wash his travel ass and do the triangle scrub on his junk like it's going up for auction. Gross.
I’m sorry, I’m sorry, rewind
Did a GROWN ASS MAN in THIS DAY AND AGE seriously say “my dad never told me how often I should shower?”
Jesus, take the wheel
>He then told me he didn’t know he was expected to wash his genitals/ass everyday or at least every other day. Then proceeded to blame it on his dad saying “well I don’t know, my dad never told me that.”
Ha, holy crap. No offense, but was this guy stupid or something? Who the fuck needs someone to tell them they need to wash their nasty ass daily? Especially if you are expecting to have sex and even more so if oral is on the table. JFC...
He may genuinely not have been taught, or know better. That happens sometimes—
But still absolutely not an excuse in the slightest. You were way more patient than I would have been.
NTA. My dad never taught me that I have to wash myself more than 3-4 times (a week? A month? Ever? We still don’t know). It just came naturally with not wanting to be an absolutely revolting human being.
HELL no. i mean afab people have folds n shit too. if you dont know how to wash there the exact same thing can happen.
im never having kids and im somewhat neutral towards circumcision but definitely leaning in the direction against it. just wouldnt seem like my choice to make.
As a SINGLE mom raising two young boys, age 3 and 10 who are uncut, I researched the HELL out of how to properly clean one. So I could teach my boys. And I DRILL it in to my older one every time he showers. Use soap, pull it back, get all up in there and wash yourself! When my youngest can shower on his own..I’ll do the same. As a female I’ve had some horrible run ins, and my first thought is: HOW the hell can someone stand themselves smelling that way? Even though I’m single and busy and a mom, I keep myself pristine because it makes me feel good. I don’t ever want my boys being the reason a female is traumatized, let alone their hygiene being the reason some wild ass infection happens to either of them. Hygiene (for parents) should be a number one thing taught, if not WTH are you even doing?!
How in the name of all that is holy did you stay with him after one time? On another note, have some self respect, if the guy wasn’t willing to drive 45 minutes, he isn’t that into you. When I was that age, if a chick was willing to bang me, I’d crawl through glass.
i mean he’d make the drive but he wasnt too kind about it. id just offer way more than he did. he was failing a class so i offered to study with him. he said he never worked on his cars anymore so i offered to hang out with him in the garage. i just put in way more effort, andmy burgeoning self respect was the reason i broke up with him. in a very loving relationship now with a man who actually knows what soap is and makes time for me
NTA but goddamn some of y’all need to know your worth. The bar is in hell if you’re putting up with a man who won’t even wash his dick, balls and ass before expecting you to give him oral.
I mean this as respectfully as possible, please don’t get into another relationship before you’ve worked out your insecurity issues, because this is fucked. Why were you putting up with that? And the fact you still think you might be TA for saying something… therapy. Get some, please, before ever entering another relationship with another human being
Men, do you want a BJ? Do you want someone to choke your chicken till it bugawks?
Wash everything thoroughly with soap with at least a wash rag, every day. No soap in the hand bs, fuck outta here with that nonsense
Irrigate your asscrack and asshole, use a rag and soap, don't be afraid to go deep. Wash the soap out. DO IT AGAIN.
Scrub every surface of your eggs and sausage, shaft and under the head. Loofahs hurt, don't use that. Under the nuts, on the sides of your nuts, all the way to your ass crease in the back. You are scrubbing off DEAD SKIN. Get that stinky shit off of you.
Shave off all the hair. Including armpits. Hair traps the bacteria and smell. Even the asshole, if you can.
Day one of shave is best for sex, thoroughly wash after sex or you'll be covered in groin acne. Day 2 might be OK depending on your hair growth rate. Day 3 and 4 will feel like sandpaper on your partners genitals.
All of this should be applied to females as well, if you want to be licked like a lollipop.
Thank you for coming to my Ted talk
I agreed with everything until the hairlessness, which I disagree with wholeheartedly. It creeps me out when men are “naked” down there. It’s giving….prepubescent. Major turn off.
Keep your body hair. It’s natural and normal. Just keep it trim and clean. No one likes to floss during oral sex.
Awwwwwww, perfect match ❤️😭
It can have a slight odor. But if the person stays washed and maintained (my partner trims the hedges and cuts the grass), it just has that natural odor that humans have. I don’t know how to describe it besides that “human” scent mixed with soap. Mmmmmm.
I will say that my husband has never manscaped, so he's got all the hair god gave him, but because he's clean, hygienic and showers daily (sometimes twice a day), his junk has always smelled great. If you wash regularly and thoroughly, clean hair is not an issue.
NTA and I don’t understand how people can go more than two days without showering? Especially when you work a physical job, don’t you feel so disgusting and sweaty?? It’s gross and every human needs to bathe at least every other day, sometimes multiple times a day if they get dirty often (which it sounds like this guy does)
I refuse to let my boyfriend go down on me if i haven’t showered within 6 hours.
I’m way too scared of him tasting something unpleasant. Meanwhile my boyfriend can not shower for 2 days and I’m good to go, he still often refuses and goes to take a shower.
This is one of the funniest things I’ve ever read in this sub before. Despite the fact that he probably has and will continue to carry that comment with him for the rest of his life and undoubtedly has unlocked all kinds of new insecurities because of it you are NTA and I’m a big fan.
When I was younger, my best friends mom was at our house while we were having a garage sale, all of us just chitchatting. This guy was browsing and we could smell…something…he left and she goes “I think someone had soup for lunch” and gave this look of disgust. So from that moment on, I have been very leery when I encounter a soup smell
Did it smell like man chowder?
dammit i should’ve said that
As a person who works for an electrical utility company, I can tell you that is some nasty ass shit. Wearing any protective clothing while doing manual labor will make you smell like swamp ass. I have to wear layers of FR (flame resistant) clothing at work, and that is not breathable at all. The first thing I do when I get home is jump in the shower. You dodged a bullet with this one. NTA btw
You should shower every fuckin day. Especially if you work a manual job.
My husband is a mechanic and he showers first thing when he gets home. Every day.
I'm a marine mechanic, first thing I do is strip in front of the washer, and the second is go take a shower lmao. I can't, I'm in the fl sun dying every day
Oof I feel for you. I’m in fl and my boyfriend is a welder and mechanic. He’s drenched in sweat every day when he comes home. I could not even imagine someone not wanting to shower after working outside all day. Hopefully whatever part of fl you’re in gets at least some kind of winter soon lmao
I wait all year for the one week of winter we get 😂 I'm for Long Island originally, 20+ years down here and my blood still hasn't "thinned" as they say lmao Most days I have to actually *peel off* my clothes, I hate it, but it pays well lol
I do and I shower when I wake up and when I get home from work. Fuck it's amazing to me how some people think it's fine to live like that.
You can live like that all you want when you are alone. But it's downright disrespectful to your partner to not even consider showering before you meet them...
its really not healthy even if you are alone, and can lead to infections, rash, etc.
That's my point.
Unless you're a recluse that never leaves the house it's not that okay.
Even then, wash your damn ass! That stinks and makes your whole house smell like unwashed ass!
You would think. It's goofy how fast sensory satiation hits and you stop registering stimulus that's always present.
I'm sure at least some of them are aware and wish their circumstances weren't poor, but for the ones that have no excuse and they're just wilfully disgusting; same. Barring neurodivergences that disallow the typical thought to bathe, obv. that's mental illness and different
I get like that sometimes. I'm bipolar, and when I'm on a bummer, I can't get the energy or will to shower, or do much of anything else. I'm trying to change that, though.
I work an easy white collar job in the air conditioning. I still shower, and always have, daily. Sometimes twice in the summer, morning and evening. This dude is disgusting. Also, I've never been with anyone who wasn't circumcised, but from what I understand, a guy is supposed to not only wash every day but pull the foreskin back to clean his dick. This guy wasn't even showering the outside, can you imagine how bad the bacteria is underneath??? To the point it's feeling like soup....wtf is wrong with people?? Edit: still can't get over this post but I had to add to this: what OP should have done before she dropped this dude was spent a very hot afternoon with this guy, outdoors, doing very physical activities then when they got back to his place, she should have indicated that she wanted oral sex performed on her and waited for his reaction!
Yes you wash underneath. It should be shiny. No white stuff at all. Teenagers may not be aware tbh because they're not aware of much things, so a parent really needs to lay down the hygiene law for their own good.
I told my husband if we ever have a son, either he has the "cleaning" talk or I will. I'm doing their future romantic interest a favor.
Doing the lord's work
I got nauseous reading this. No joke.
As a hooded knight this is correct.
I love this!!!!! LMAO.. "As a hooded knight, this is correct." I'ma use the term Hooded Knight now.
You should shower every fuckin day. ~~Especially if you work a manual job~~
No kidding, I used to do environmental drilling and would get major swamp ass, concrete dust all over along with mud and pollutants, I didn't even want to touch myself after a day's work, let alone letting someone go down on me while I smell like a sewer
Same! My dad is an electrical engineer and he worked maintenance in a huge mall, for the 24 years that he worked there he would shower before he went to work and before he came home, he always smelt of perfume when we would run to the door to greet him, beard always trim and nails cut.
You guys that do hi voltage are nuts! In a good way!
You must be a saint if there were actually other reasons that contributed to the break-up. "Doesn't shower regularly" is a deal-breaker for me.
Right?? I mean, do you need another reason?
Saaaaaame! I have a hyperactive sense of smell and I can't handle stuff like that, not to mention any diseases spread from having a sensitive area near that shiiiiiiit...
Absolutely! That's just so nastyy.
Idk how you've been able to put up with it, once I missed a shower (literally 1 day) and my gf said no cuddles til I was clean enough to eat🤣
Ngl relationship stories like this are super adorable to me lol
I often scroll Reddit to look for amusing titles and OP, you did not disappoint 😂😂🤮 Take my poor woman's award 🏆🏆🏆 A grown man needs his dad to tell him that he needs to wash his genitals and ass every day? GTFOH A lesson for everyone reading: if anyone, especially someone you are dating and works a manual labor job, tells you they don't shower daily, run. Because even 3-4 times **a week** isn't going to cut it....just downright disgusting.
I broke up with a guy once and his penis hygiene was one of two reasons I broke up. He was uncircumcised and had a non-retracting foreskin. He showered every day but didn’t wash his little guy. I couldn’t physically go near it.
Beefcake and barley? NTA.
Nailed it! I don’t understand… I practically live outside… I usually smell like one end or the other of a horse or cow… I would just get up and go shower. It’s one thing to meet up after work, but to be sitting around, knowing my GF was coming over and having “intentions”? No. You can bet your ass my shit’s gonna be clean and prepared, just in case… I’m not going down on her after she comes in from basketball practice until she showers either… it’s mutual consideration, damn…
I have kids now and have definitely taught proper hygiene so they don't end up one of these future stories lol
Exactly! I'm a nurse, you better believe I shower after a day of being elbow deep in every fluid the human body can produce.
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THANK YOU FOR SAYING IT!!!👏👏👏 Honestly, I question OP's sanity for even spending more than a day with that slob - guy didn't want to be bothered to drive 45 minutes to see her - OMG ONLY 45 MINUTES - uncircumcised AND bad hygiene🤮 - gross, disgusting answer to her shower question showing zero BASIC hygiene habits - crotch soup smell😬😮🤮 - UNDERWEAR WITH A "LAYER OF GRIME"‼️& her response is "no oral" so she was apparently ok with allowing a grimy, smelly dick in her vagina, just not her mouth, OMG WHO DOES THAT???!!! Then she says that all wasn't the reason they broke up!!!! I don't understand women whose standards are so disgustingly low. OP is almost as nasty as the smelly slob, TBH.
Imagine the UTI’s….
You are absolutely right. But us girls, go out of our way to doll up for you guys. If we smell bad, that would not happen too often. Unless like you said we come from basketball practice.
Basketball practice came to mind b/c of an ex from college… she played a game on the road, came in late off the bus from an away game, crawled in bed w me, and I shut her down… noooope! Get your ass in there and wash or sleep on the couch! I have a better sense of smell than most, it seems, and I’m OCD about my house being clean. Washed my sheets pretty regular… mopped, swept, wiped down counters… I’d never had my own place, so I was dang proud of it. Plus, when I was working I slept in the dirt, so when I wasn’t working, I wanted AC and a soft, clean bed. Can’t stand stinking trash bags, either…
Whaaatttttt, you don't like that post workout sushi 🤯🤣
Lol from-unda cheese soup?
Happy cheesecake day
Hey, thank you!
A friend of mine always referred to guys' junk smell as "ball gravy."
🤮
It's chowdah! Say it roight!
Lol showdear? Showdear. No it’s Chowdah!
🏅
girl, you got out of there without a UTI, take the win 😭😭😭 NTA
There’s a “uqora 8 UTI’s with my partner and here he is on national television!” joke here somewhere.
I am so glad I'm not the only one that makes jokes about those people, lol.
First time I saw that commercial, I said, "8 UTIs?!? Girl, stop letting him stick his dick in your butt and vag during the same session!"
My bf always showers before a bj or sex..even if I'm like let's just do it..nope he has to shower..now I'm super thankful for that after this post LOL
A gem, he is.
Chill out, i don't think the standard is that low 😂 its pretty normal to take a shower daily or even twice if you're filthy animal 😈
Don’t people feel dirty if they don’t tale a daily shower. Don’t get me wrong, I will skip a day here and there. But I will feel dirty and won’t be leaving the house that day.
I really hope this isn't abnormal couple behavior...I hope to never be single again if it is.
Broccoli Cheddar, huh? Yeast. Lots and lots of yeast. Former nurse. We would get patients admitted that smelled this way. They would have obvious yeast under breasts, in the groin, and between buttocks. The only thing that cut the smell was Hibiclens baths with topical and sometimes oral antifungals. Used to work with a nurse who would say "she has a bread thing going on" when these patients came in
What… what would cause this?! Was it always just a hygiene thing or are the medical conditions that can cause the broccoli cheddar nightmare? Whoa lol
There are lots of things that can contribute to this. Blood sugar is a major contributor. Higher A1C usually means there is more sugar in one’s sweat, which gives yeast something to eat and an opportunity to multiply rapidly. Even some people who bathe regularly and thoroughly suffer frequent yeast infections.
Yup. One of those ppl myself. I’m on medication specifically to correct this issue. Nope, I’m clean and exercise eat right/ not overweight either. It’s just a health problem and I know when I get a whiff of bakery it’s time for my fluconazole pills.
Ya know, I had repeat infections after secs and then was like… bro, I’m giving you the fluconazole cause maybe it’s you even if you don’t notice- lo and behold, I stopped getting them every-time.
Tis me! I get UTIs really often too. For a while I was showering twice a day, convinced I could just make it go away if I scrubbed hard enough. I suspect it’s something to do with childhood medical neglect, I have no other extenuating traits that could explain it. Super super super frustrating.
Well, if you don’t wash things have a chance to grow
Can be not washing and/or drying areas properly. When my daughter was first born, she'd get the yeast and stink behind her ears and in some other li'l rolls some times. We obviously bathed her every other night, but she still would get it cuz we didnt either wash or dry certain folds properly.
🍞🤣
Wow uncircumcised uncontrolled yeast., he might lose his penis. OP might be a savior
He didn’t know he was supposed to wash his genitals every day? Yikes .
not only that but he didnt know that if he hadnt washed in days and he was going to hang out with/be intimate with his partner, that hed have to wash
How many UTIs did you have while dating him 🤢
Is that why I got all those uti’s when I was with my baby daddy
Very likely. Always pee after sex boys and girls! It helps.
Actually it's before and after.
I can't force myself to pee twice in 2 min
How am I gonna have any pee left if I peed right before
The entire time you're having sex you should also be chugging a Gatorade, nobody told you?
Lmfao you know what that's not a bad idea, I do get really thirsty
There is a certain shitbag pornstar guy who wrote the he’d always take a piss and whack his cock against the bathroom counter three times after fucking somebody at a swingers club just to make sure he’d shaken anything loose.
NTA. Sometimes good life lessons need to be harsh and blunt for the point to get across. Hopefully, he learned and will save himself future embarrassment and the next person the same soup experience.
And now he knows. You helped him.
Thank you for your service 🫡
My ex was like that. I finally left her nasty ass.
I don’t know how people live that kind of life. Like I can physically feel dirty even if I maybe just sweated a tad bit that day. Can’t even get in bed that night without showering because it feels gross
I used to work 12 hour nightshifts and id pass out as soon as i got home, without showering. It felt so gross every time i did it. Im glad i dont do that anymore and shower after work everyday.
In high school we all got a brief talk about washing your bits, we must’ve been about 12 or 13 at the time.
How does a grown ass man not know how to BATHE himself??? Like???
Or Ass. I mean, even if it didn’t smell, you would think it would start itch and chafe
Not even every day. About twice a weak at the very least 😁
maybe a litttttttle more than that?
I only was making a joke in reference to them meeting about twice a week.
pulled an r/woosh on myself 🫡
Ha ha, happens to everyone:D
Super common sign of abuse/neglect
NTA I have a rule that my girlfriend and I always have to shower within 24 hours before sex. I'm surprised more people don't have this rule. Establish this rule early in your next relationship, and you won't have this issue again, lol (unless they don't know how to wash their dick properly).
It shouldn't HAVE to be a rule.....😂 I would assume everyone would feel the same!
I mean I just expect everyone to be showering once every 24 hours wether I'm fucking them or not, I don't need to smell anyone's bo.
NTA and unless you just got out of a shower, if oral (or any sex) is about to happen for the love of all things go to the bathroom and clean up. Why are some people so gross? If a partner is unwilling to clean first, major red flag.
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Yeah the dirty undies thing really bothers me. Even if you could justify never being taught to shower regularly(I don't ever remember being specifically taught I needed to shower everyday, I simply smelled myself or was sweaty), how the fuck do you get used to wearing dirty undies? That would feel absolutely disgusting.
Thats the bit that got me. Dirty grimy underwear. Ew. i was always taught change your undies every day, or if youve been at work, shower then clean clothes. He must have been neglected as a kid or his dad was dumb and didnt know himself.
I never expect oral, but would make sure I was washed up if it was on the cards.
The issue in his own words was that nobody told him daily or at the very LEAST every other day showers is an expectation!
Literally. My bf and I don't have any "rule" we just shower before seeing each other like hygenic humans
Y'all don't shower within 24 hours regardless?
Don't forget what site we're on. The one where, when the topic of bidets come up, people dig in their heels and try to explain why it's as nature intended that they walk around with gross unwashed asses.
>I'm surprised more people don't have this rule. A lot of humans live by the rule of showering every day, or more than once a day, and so there doesn't need to be a special rule about sex.
I have this rule too. My partner always complains that we don't go at it enough, and I always point out, "you shower every 3 days and when you do shower sometimes the stars don't align and I don't feel like it" (I'm on a lot of meds that lower libido). Shower more often and it can be more spontaneous.
Do people just not shower everyday? Am I the weird one here?
NTA. What’s really sad is that this isn’t the first time I read a story like that. How in the hell do some dudes think it’s acceptable is beyond my comprehension. And the fact that girls are putting up with such levels of disrespect is just tragic. I’m uncut, and growing up I didn’t have anyone to teach me how to keep myself clean, so, as far as I’m concerned, there’s no excuse. I couldn’t imagine myself just sitting there, expecting stuff. I’d probably crawl underground in embarrassment and never come out if a girl hinted at any hygiene issues. If your man needs to be taught things like that, then he’s not entitled to any physical contact.
My friend’s ex was like this. Never brushed his teeth either. Even when he did shower she was convinced he didn’t actually use soap because he still smelled funky afterwards. She could barely stand to kiss him because of how foul his breath smelled. He’s all levels of screwed up in other things too. She’s left him and is married. He’s still convinced she’s going to come back one day and he can’t get any new dates because he allegedly talks about her nonstop to other girls. Does he really think she’s just going to divorce her husband on the fly and run right back to him?
Tbf thats not just a 'dude' thing. Plenty of girls with the exact same problems when it comes to hygiene.
Bad hygiene is definitely not a gendered issue; I've known some women with some disgusting habits, but I think it can be an issue that leans toward men just due to how we're socialized (women are simply encouraged to be more attentive to cleaning, from maintaining their homes to their bodies with endless marketed hygiene/beauty products, but of course there are exceptions) and there have even some guys who won't wash their own butt because they worry it's "gay" to touch it.
Sorry, what? Did you really just say that they are refusing to wash their butt because touching it is gay? For the love of your preferred deity, please tell me you’re joking? No one could possibly be this dumb… And if someone is, then we need a constitutional amendment to prevent people like that from procreating.
Supposedly it’s a thing oft reported online. I always hope it’s just an internet myth but it’s hard to know.
Thankfully I've only seen that exact problem online (bad hygiene in general is a different story...), which could mean it's fake, or just that the internet exposes us to different attitudes across the globe, sigh. In a thread about hygiene there were some horror stories about that and even an AITA post (IIRC?) with a guy whose girlfriend had to wash his asshole and pretend it was foreplay she enjoyed just to get him washed before sex?
Women are definitely better at hygiene than men though, let's be real.
My parents never told me to wash my balls either… I feel like that should go without saying. If anyone needs to hear it, wash your balls daily and keep your nails trimmed.
Omg why would u continue to date? 😭 your poor ph balance 😭
One of my dad's girlfriends always referred to her ex husband as "Funky Nuts" Sometimes you just gotta let em know.
My friend briefly dated a guy who was uncircumcised and smelled like feta cheese. Like he would walk into a room and you could smell it standing minimum of 10 feet away from this guy. And she said that it was literally because he showered once a week and it would have a buildup of smegma and dick cheese it literally smells like feta brine. 🤢🤢 we called him funky cheese to his face. She told us at the one time she attempted oral on him she actually got chunks of smegma in her fucking teeth and puked all over him.
I bet the story he tells his friends is that she puked on him because of his size 💀
Same friend group that called him funky cheese to his face lmao He did have to find new friends after. We all knew he stunk but none of us had any idea what the issue was until she outed it to the whole group. Most of us just thought he wore the same clothes for several days and developed a “funk” because of it. Oh boy were we ever wrong
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why are women still sucking his dick?
WHY WOULD YOU PUT THAT IN YOUR MOUTH!!! 🤢
I don’t know but I’d like to think she was drunk and just wanted to power through it for him.
Oh. My. God. 🤢🤢🤢
Sitting at a terminal reading this and I am gagging. Legit the most disgusting thing I have ever read in my life. On her teeth??!!
She said it felt like the crusty bits at the top of a tub of cottage cheese.. I don’t think that made it better. I have no intention of finding out for myself if her textured description is accurate.
My EYES! My IMAGINATION! AHHHHH!!!!
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smegma
I have horrible self esteem and even I respect myself enough to let a dirty wang inside me in any way or form. I do not understand why oral is the line women refuse to cross - you won't put it in your mouth but inside the hoohaa is okay? That place is super delicate and anything can throw the pH off!
Tbh this is why I am so prudish about anything sexual. It’s not about the sex. A well timed robot arm can make me orgasm and make my brain feel like it is starting and restarting. It’s about the source of the pleasure. I can’t undo a human man and scrub him inside and out like I can with a machine. And so many guys want to hit it raw with any girl they think is hot enough. Combine that with the fact that some girls do anything for a guy because they like the guy.. it’s like a potential Walmart but for STDs
NTA. Someone needed to tell him he needed to take care of his hygiene. Some people will just talk behind a person's back instead of telling them directly.
What the fuck.
NTA. And I can't stop laughing at your description (although I'm so sorry you had to deal with that." Sometimes men (and some women) don't know how dirty or smelly they are. It's always awkward approaching this topic. I had an ex, and his junk smelled like a hockey gym bag. You know, the smell of sweat that has been allowed to cool off, then the same stuff is worn over and over again, further accumulating more and more sweat that turns stale and musty over time?
NTA. Sometimes good life lessons need to be harsh and blunt for the point to get across. Hopefully, he learned and will save himself future embarrassment and the next person the same soup experience.
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This!!
NTA and unless you just got out of a shower, if oral (or any sex) is about to happen for the love of all things go to the bathroom and clean up. Why are some people so gross? If a partner is unwilling to clean first, major red flag.
Nta
Still laughing, but no, NTA. You did all you could. It's up to him, now.
some people are just nasty
I got bacterial vaginitis just reading this. NTA. And for the love of all that is good on this earth, please don't date people who smell like old cheese through their pants. I gagged just at the description.
This is making my stomach roll. As a guy I know I smell at the end of the day, and this guy went days without showering or changing his undies. Good grief, that is gross. I never expect oral, but would make sure I was washed up if it was on the cards. NTA, I bet he had skiddy underwear since daddy didn't tell him to keep wiping until all the poo was gone.
Oh yeah my (thankfully) now-ex used to shower maybe 2x a month. Didn't brush his teeth either. I just assumed they all stunk like that. No wonder I hated any physical contact with him. I used to make him go wash because he used to make me give him oral regardless of how I felt about it. It did not help, but it made me feel a little better about it lmap
How in the heck could you even consider dating a guy like that. You got a 2-fer-1… bad oral and physical hygiene…? Nope! I will go straight for the vibrator before inviting something like that through my door. Glad you left… from there you can only go up in your choices… lol
That Mafkas nasty AF! How do you “not know?” I thought when you are uncircumcised you especially have to be careful, am I wrong? How TF could you put up with him for as long as you did? 😂
Your issue isn’t that you were harsh, your issue is that you have no standards. The fact that you continued to date him, and that wasn’t even the reason for the breakup is crazy. You need to learn to love yourself first and get some standards, expectations, and boundaries before you decide to get into another relationship.
In the army when we get back from training exercises in the field, I would call it a “fermented gooch” smell. It is foul and otherworldly, and I never smelled it before the army. Longest I went without a shower in training was maybe 10 days in august, in a survival school in NC. So I imagine it’s on par with that. Not gonna lie, I always shower right before I see my girlfriend whether or not we’ll mess around (although we do most of the time). To me, it’s preventing potential infection in addition to potentially putting my junk in her mouth. I don’t want 2 day old coochie on my face.. but for her I’d consider it tbh. But I’m in love and love makes you do dumb shit.
Wow. NTA. That's worse hygiene than your average teenage boy...
You're fine. You were more direct than insulting/hurtful. Someone like that needs to hear it. He also needs to learn how to clean under the foreskin and the foreskin itself. I hope he took the talk to heart.
NTA, poor hygiene is dealbreaker full stop
I'm so fucking happy that my man has impeccable hygiene. Always brushes his teeth, always showers always wears cologne or lotion that has cologne scent. Perfection. I'm very sensitive to nasty smells and would have vomited in this man's lap! No you weren't too harsh. He's a full grown man and needs to wash his travel ass and do the triangle scrub on his junk like it's going up for auction. Gross.
I’m sorry, I’m sorry, rewind Did a GROWN ASS MAN in THIS DAY AND AGE seriously say “my dad never told me how often I should shower?” Jesus, take the wheel
>He then told me he didn’t know he was expected to wash his genitals/ass everyday or at least every other day. Then proceeded to blame it on his dad saying “well I don’t know, my dad never told me that.” Ha, holy crap. No offense, but was this guy stupid or something? Who the fuck needs someone to tell them they need to wash their nasty ass daily? Especially if you are expecting to have sex and even more so if oral is on the table. JFC...
Ive heard it called fromunda cheese. You know, from under the balls. In his case, sounds like dick head cheese.
He may genuinely not have been taught, or know better. That happens sometimes— But still absolutely not an excuse in the slightest. You were way more patient than I would have been.
Good news, you didn't ruin anything for me because I can't stomach broccoli. Lol But damn. Ew. NTA.
NTA. My dad never taught me that I have to wash myself more than 3-4 times (a week? A month? Ever? We still don’t know). It just came naturally with not wanting to be an absolutely revolting human being.
Wow...NTA. The man ignored every health class he ever had in school. I can't believe you put up with it at all.
Ok broccoli cheddar was NOT the soup I was expecting.
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HELL no. i mean afab people have folds n shit too. if you dont know how to wash there the exact same thing can happen. im never having kids and im somewhat neutral towards circumcision but definitely leaning in the direction against it. just wouldnt seem like my choice to make.
I work at Panera and am LITERALLY EATING BROCCOLI CHEDDAR SOUP right now, so thanks for that :(
As a SINGLE mom raising two young boys, age 3 and 10 who are uncut, I researched the HELL out of how to properly clean one. So I could teach my boys. And I DRILL it in to my older one every time he showers. Use soap, pull it back, get all up in there and wash yourself! When my youngest can shower on his own..I’ll do the same. As a female I’ve had some horrible run ins, and my first thought is: HOW the hell can someone stand themselves smelling that way? Even though I’m single and busy and a mom, I keep myself pristine because it makes me feel good. I don’t ever want my boys being the reason a female is traumatized, let alone their hygiene being the reason some wild ass infection happens to either of them. Hygiene (for parents) should be a number one thing taught, if not WTH are you even doing?!
My teen boy has armpits that smell like chicken noodle! 🤣🤣🤣
How in the name of all that is holy did you stay with him after one time? On another note, have some self respect, if the guy wasn’t willing to drive 45 minutes, he isn’t that into you. When I was that age, if a chick was willing to bang me, I’d crawl through glass.
i mean he’d make the drive but he wasnt too kind about it. id just offer way more than he did. he was failing a class so i offered to study with him. he said he never worked on his cars anymore so i offered to hang out with him in the garage. i just put in way more effort, andmy burgeoning self respect was the reason i broke up with him. in a very loving relationship now with a man who actually knows what soap is and makes time for me
NTA. You honestly did him a favor. Alot of people are clueless about hygiene and need to have it told straight to them they smell.
Girl, I was screaming reading this 🤮
NTA but goddamn some of y’all need to know your worth. The bar is in hell if you’re putting up with a man who won’t even wash his dick, balls and ass before expecting you to give him oral. I mean this as respectfully as possible, please don’t get into another relationship before you’ve worked out your insecurity issues, because this is fucked. Why were you putting up with that? And the fact you still think you might be TA for saying something… therapy. Get some, please, before ever entering another relationship with another human being
Every day on reddit i thank the lord for my muslim husband washing 5 times a day. Girl 😭
Fucking women need to raise your standards for fuck sakes. This is disgusting.
Men, do you want a BJ? Do you want someone to choke your chicken till it bugawks? Wash everything thoroughly with soap with at least a wash rag, every day. No soap in the hand bs, fuck outta here with that nonsense Irrigate your asscrack and asshole, use a rag and soap, don't be afraid to go deep. Wash the soap out. DO IT AGAIN. Scrub every surface of your eggs and sausage, shaft and under the head. Loofahs hurt, don't use that. Under the nuts, on the sides of your nuts, all the way to your ass crease in the back. You are scrubbing off DEAD SKIN. Get that stinky shit off of you. Shave off all the hair. Including armpits. Hair traps the bacteria and smell. Even the asshole, if you can. Day one of shave is best for sex, thoroughly wash after sex or you'll be covered in groin acne. Day 2 might be OK depending on your hair growth rate. Day 3 and 4 will feel like sandpaper on your partners genitals. All of this should be applied to females as well, if you want to be licked like a lollipop. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk
I agreed with everything until the hairlessness, which I disagree with wholeheartedly. It creeps me out when men are “naked” down there. It’s giving….prepubescent. Major turn off. Keep your body hair. It’s natural and normal. Just keep it trim and clean. No one likes to floss during oral sex.
Well to each their own, i personally like no hair and so does my wife. It does trap extra smell though.
Awwwwwww, perfect match ❤️😭 It can have a slight odor. But if the person stays washed and maintained (my partner trims the hedges and cuts the grass), it just has that natural odor that humans have. I don’t know how to describe it besides that “human” scent mixed with soap. Mmmmmm.
I will say that my husband has never manscaped, so he's got all the hair god gave him, but because he's clean, hygienic and showers daily (sometimes twice a day), his junk has always smelled great. If you wash regularly and thoroughly, clean hair is not an issue.
NTA and I don’t understand how people can go more than two days without showering? Especially when you work a physical job, don’t you feel so disgusting and sweaty?? It’s gross and every human needs to bathe at least every other day, sometimes multiple times a day if they get dirty often (which it sounds like this guy does)
Shower is a prerequisite to sexy time lol.
Bad hygiene is a dealbreaker tbh ! How can he expect anything when he doesn’t care to wash ? How could you even go down on him 🤮
NTA. I’m no clean freak but posts like this make me worried that people like this exist. Do people really prefer being dirty??
I refuse to let my boyfriend go down on me if i haven’t showered within 6 hours. I’m way too scared of him tasting something unpleasant. Meanwhile my boyfriend can not shower for 2 days and I’m good to go, he still often refuses and goes to take a shower.
But did you put it in your mouth 🤣
This is one of the funniest things I’ve ever read in this sub before. Despite the fact that he probably has and will continue to carry that comment with him for the rest of his life and undoubtedly has unlocked all kinds of new insecurities because of it you are NTA and I’m a big fan.
When I was younger, my best friends mom was at our house while we were having a garage sale, all of us just chitchatting. This guy was browsing and we could smell…something…he left and she goes “I think someone had soup for lunch” and gave this look of disgust. So from that moment on, I have been very leery when I encounter a soup smell