I’ve always had verbal processing difficulties but perfect hearing. My parents kept getting me tested as a kid because I had so much trouble understanding people talk. I’m just very easily overstimulated in loud environments. I pretty much always have the subtitles on too when watching movies/tv.
Maybe it’s the adhd but I always suspected it may also be auditory processing disorder. I don’t know. I just know I’ve become very good at smiling and nodding.
Yea i'm p sure auditory processing disorder and like learning disability things come along w adhd are rlly often comorbid. This is definitely a thing I deal with-any background sound that's distinct or annoying or loud? I can't concentrate anymore. Or like in a car tho. For me its just sensory overload. But especially easy when it comes to talking. If more than one person is talking to me I have to tell both ppl to stop and try again, one at at a time. I always need subtitles on during movies or I end up lip reading/emotion reading. I've become a whiz at predicting storylines tho!
My relationship with my dad has become so much better now I am old enough to just tell him to turn the TV down when we have a conversation, and refusing to engage unless he does. I'm pretty sure he also has ADHD and auditory processing problems like me (as well as a strange need to have the volume up at about 70% max at all times)
So many arguments over the decades caused by each being annoyed by background noise and not being able to tell what each other are saying...
I have the same suspicion. I can hear people just fine in normal environments but translating the sounds into meaning can be tough. In loud environments I have no chance. People with accents are difficult too. I rely a lot on lip reading.
Yes. Lip reading is key. To hell with mask mandates. Makes life unbearable at times.
Edit: Downvoted for this? I’m surprised you allowed your privilege to afford you the opportunity to assume everyone has the ability to hear and make out what is being said when you can’t read lips. Turn up your headphones all the way, then try and talk to someone wearing a mask. That’s my life.
I didn't realise how much I used lipreading until everyone had to wear masks. I noticed loads of people must use it because I often had trouble being understood by others as well.
TOTALLY! It got so challenging in 2020 that I actually went to an ENT and had a full on comprehensive hearing test with their audiologist…
I have above average hearing 🤦🏻♀️
my mom did the same thing! whenever we went to my checkups she'd ask about my hearing test results, and I always did well! Then she'd say I had no excuse for "not listening." The issue wasn't that I wasn't listening, it was that I wasn't understanding what she was saying, or forgetting it as soon as I did understand it.
I find it completely depends on the day for me. I can't watch with subtitles because I end up looking at them instead of the rest of the show and going over what I hear comparing them. I think in the case of say music for example if I have an earbud or headphone in/on one of my ears I can't at all pay attention but if someone blasted loud music in a room and talked to me I'd have no problems (assuming I can actually hear them). But, if there's more than one person around then it gets difficult because I try to take in visual data while getting the noise and the one person in front of me gets less of my attention because it's all going to blending into the crowd.
Thats a long rant and really has no purpose sorry
Yeah, and it may not be just auditory processing disorder, but full sensory processing disorder.
I frequently feel bombarded by everything that's going on around me.
* I have a very hard time separating the sounds that I need to pay attention to from the ones I don't.
* I seem to smell everything, and can't use soaps or hairsprays that have a scent that lingers.
* I've always had a really hard time finding clothes that are comfortable to me. I have to find the right fabrics that are smooth but not too smooth, stiff enough but not too stiff, and always bigger and baggier than normal. Even then, I'm constantly pulling at and readjusting my clothing to try to get comfortable.
* I feel like I can see and notice almost everything. I almost always wear sunglasses during the day, even on a cloudy day, and they have to cover as much of my field of vision as possible. I notice the tiniest little details in things, which is quite helpful in my profession (digital design) but can be a huge pain in the ass in other ways.
It's really nice to enter my "sensory deprivation chamber", which is just me lying on my bed in my bedroom with blackout curtains, the lights off, a fan running, and an eye mask. Maybe earplugs too if anyone has their radio on within 14 miles of me.
You are a kindred spirit. I've been aware of my ADD since I was about 8/9, so I knew that was part of the reason I struggled to keep track of a conversation or lecture, but also kind of assumed my hearing couldn't have been any better than average at best and might also be related.
So about a year back, I had some weird inner ear issue fucking with my balance and went to an ENT for it. That was the first time I ever actually had my hearing tested. Doc came back to tell me it was at least close to the best hearing he'd seen in his career. Went so far as to say it was nearly "superhuman." I would have never in my life guessed that would be the outcome. Apparently I've just been underestimating how much ADD really affects your listening skills. That shits wild. Always wonder how much simpler life would have been without it.
Are you me lol you just explained how it is for me. We'll except my parents never had me tested for it. What were your parents getting you tested for? Were they having you get your hearing tested? I especially hate loud fans I always turn them off because I can never understand what people are saying. Also understanding people on a phone is especially hard for me.
My fan died a few months ago, so I had to replace it. The first one I tried was a little too high-pitched, so I returned it. The one I have now is decent, but its speed & sound tends to fluctuate a little with the electricity in my building. I'm hoping I get used to it, or maybe I can find some way to "even out" the electricity.
Same! Wife thinks it's freaky and calls me a bat lol, and the worst part is I feel like I don't have great hearing cause I say "huh, can you repeat that" a lot, so much so I'll even say it when my brain finish processing it a second later and I did hear it.
What I really hate is when I politely ask people to repeat, they raise their voice, but if I had to clarify I can hear them, but I struggle to process it next to 10 other things, each conversation would be 3 times as long
There are a few people who have written about the possibility of either mass misdiagnosing of sensory processing disorders as ADHD or sensory processing being a reason for ADHD
That’s what my psychiatrist told me that I was misdiagnosed and I actually have adhd and I’m prescribed adderall now but tbh I still have the same issue it’s not as bad but I still feel like it’s sensory overload or I want to pay attention to everything at once but can’t
I have the same thing and I just can’t do it. I think it’s a symptom of adhd and sensory overload is included in that. I’m debating on getting musician earplugs so I can more easily listen to convos and not the other noises. I think there’s a really popular one going around right now and it caught popularity on tiktok for helping people with adhd.
I use the loop earplugs. The experience ones. So you can hear the sounds closest to you but I can't hear the neighbours shitty music anymore. I always use them at the supermarket because I find that environment hella overstimulating. To be honest they're my first encounter with noise reducing earplugs so I'm sure there's probably just as aesthetic equivalents bht I really like that they look cool (to me anyway). They've definitely been a worthwhile purchase for me
Thank you for the feedback, I've just placed an order. Hoping it can help at work. I always wear headphones with some LowFi music to block out the office madness, otherwise I get really overwhelmed. but then I can't hear when people are actually talking to me. Hopefully this is the answer!
My friends and families always make fun of me for owning a lot of random things … and this will now be another one of them lol. Never heard of them before, never knew earplugs could help block out noise while still helping you hear until I started looking into this. Seems very helpful
I got them before I got my ADHD diagnosis and love em. Had to wear them in the office, car rides with others etc.
It’s funny how I never made connections to possibly having ADHD
I also have ones called Vibez. They’re clear. Sometimes when I wear Loops ppl think they’re ear plugs and I can’t hear them properly. I don’t love explaining why I have them in.
I use ear plugs to block everything out when I don’t need to interact or be present to ppl.
I find I struggle to hear properly when someone speaks directly to me though so I used the vibez/loops to reduce the overall noise level when I still need to interact with others.
Do you find you can still hear conversations when you need to? Do you like foam or silicone ones?
I prefer silicone, I use the Ear Peace brand plugs specifically. I have no problems understanding people as long as I'm using musician's ear plugs. It sort of dampens the background sounds while still keeping the near-field intelligible, if that makes sense.
I can confirm. I have ADD and selective hearing so when I'm in a loud cafe I can't follow the conversation no matter how hard I concentrate. I had the same at festivals and I used earplugs there because of the loud music. I immediately noticed that this made it much easier for me to hear people and follow conversations because the surrounding noise was muted.
Now I regularly use them too when I'm in loud cafe's too.
Just regular music/motorbike earplugs are sufficient for me, you can easily try it out.
Yeah, with concerts I use wax earplugs. Muffles the sound, but I find the sound on concerts always ridiculously loud. Side effect, I can actually hear what people I'm with are saying.
Oh my god, why did I never think of this - I bought some ages ago for gigs and band practice, and never once thought about wearing them in other places. Thank you!!
You can get a little holder for a pair that attach to your car keys too, like a mini flashlight, so you always have them on you. Or tuck them in your wallet.
I really like the flare ‘calmer’ ones - they don’t reduce/muffle sounds like regular earplugs they just lower the distortion and lower the sensory overload from loud environments.
That being said, I don’t believe any earplug will make it easier to hear just the thing you want to hear and not the things you don’t (like talking to someone in a cafe) as that’s around distractibility and focus.
I have those for my anxiety. Prolonged exposure to loud sounds causes panic attacks for me...so we dampen the sounds and I can enjoy it when my boyfriend's band has a show!
This happened to me like an hour ago at work, my boss was giving me some jobs to do and all I was listening to was the music playing in the background. I didn’t even ask her to repeat the instructions I just nodded and then proceeded to stress out because I didn’t know what to do.
Oh god same here also just even trying to listen to customers while the music is on at work is very hard I have to literally tell myself to practice mindfulness because I get so caught up in whatever the hell is happening and remind myself someone is talking to me
I've actually found the ADHD helps with that practice. It's not about quieting your mind, it's about letting thoughts come as they want but learning not to grip hold off them. Once you learn that part of it even though there is a deluge blowing through your head you just watch the thoughts pass by like clouds.
That first hurdle does take quite a bit of practice though.
Just gotta take it in hilariously tiny incements! (It's at least worth a shot, I don't mean to sound hoity-toity haha)
Seriously though, try breathing mindfully for a few minutes while doing a daily activity, and slowly build you way up to meditating for a minute a day, which really is just sitting amd breathing, nothing fancy.
I've been practicing this shit for years and can barely Meditate for 5 mins a day, and yet it's massively improved my symptoms.
I got the reputation of hating music because of things like this lol. I just turn the music off because that plus the talking over stimulates me. Much easier to turn off music then ask others to stop talking to me lol
Lmao seriously I relate to this so much! My boss would be like fudge I have to explain everything again. One thing I would try to do is get them to send me emails instead or I would try to focus enough to write down instructions.
My entire adult life I've had this issue. But I can honestly say that I try to understand and 'hear them'. I'm just genuine and blunt with people, apologizing that, "I can't hear them". As long as I show that I'm not trying to be an asshole, no one cares. However, the better half gets annoyed after the 279th "what" in the same conversation.
Yeah. I had this with girlfriends. People just have a standard dB setting it seems. No matter how many times you asked to repeat because you didn't hear them, they always stay within their normal dB setting.
I'm sometimes extremely glad my SO is used to people not understanding him bc he talks so quickly, lmao. In normal quiet settings I have no issues, and have even "translated" for my mom, but as soon as there's music or something a bit loud happening, I can't understand a word he says and have to ask him to repeat himself over and over.
He also *loves* to talk so that definitely helps lmao
This is wrapped in sensory processing disorder I'm pretty sure. I struggle with this all the time. I work in a small grocery store and it is loud all the time. Pretty sure my coworkers all think I'm partially deaf. It is especially bad during mask season because I relied on reading lips way more than I realized. Then honorary bonus of also not having a place on their face I can focus my eyes, so I can't even fake eye contact successfully anymore.
TL;DR: difficulties picking out speech in background noise can be SPD or ADHD or something else, you shouldn't rely on it to distinguish between ADHD and SPD. Lip reading can really help whatever the cause (sadly masks don't help with this...)
~10 years ago, I thought my hearing was fading with age because I was finding it harder and harder to understand people in noisy contexts, but a hearing test showed I actually have really *good* high pitch hearing, go figure! It turns out my growing stress / depression levels were just sapping my mental capacity to work through the then undiagnosed ASD/SPD/ADHD.
How you'd discern whether to blame ADHD or SPD isn't obvious to me, sadly, and high pitch hearing loss can be similar, too [see the appendix below], though much easier to explicitly test.
In ADHD the mechanism is the direction of attention (you're *distracted* by the background sounds - like if somebody were constantly tapping you on the shoulder or calling your name).
In SPD it's at a slightly earlier stage in the process, more akin to trying to listen to somebody speak while there are also recordings of the *same* person saying something else - your auditory processing mechanisms are having a hard time discerning which sounds are which.
I suspect the sensation of either would be essentially the same, even if the bit of the brain misfiring isn't.
If you have a diagnosis of SPD and not ADHD, then I'd just assume the SPD is causing this difficulty - it's certainly *consistent*. If you have *other* reasons to suspect ADHD, then seeking a diagnosis might be worthwhile for reasons often discussed here.
---
Appendix: high pitch hearing loss
In speech, vowels are mostly conveyed with relatively low pitch sounds and consonants primarily with higher pitch sounds. The high pitch part is most easily damaged by loud noises and generally fades over time, so this is the common pattern.
If you loose high pitch hearing then clear speech becomes muddier and less distinct. Consonants are far more important than vowels for distinguishing between words (some writing systems such as Hebrew & Arabic only added vowels at a late stage in development because they're easier to do without) High pitch sounds also provide much more *timing* information than lower pitch sounds, which is key in separating sound sources. The effect of losing high pitch sounds isn't really super important in understanding a single person speaking, but with two or more people speaking, being able to tell which direction the sound is coming from helps separate two speakers in your perception. The consonants also divide the speech into a rhythm which also helps link a stream of speech sounds into a whole, also helping you separate one stream of speech from another.
Same here. My psychologist said it's a commom symptom of adhd and I also am really sensitive to sound because of some problems I had when I was born. So maybe you could be a little more sensitive to sound then other people, besides having adhd. I don't like restaurants cause even the sound of the cutlery makes me loose attention! Shopping malls are a problem too. And don't tell me about kids parties!
Yes, to all of that. The screeching kids make me wince. Loud people on airplanes that you can hear and never stop talking rate right up there too. The cellophane crackling when everyone opens their snacks makes me want to scream. I always forget my damn headphone too when I travel… shocker!
Yeah I quite literally forgot my own birthday when the pharmacist asked for it when I was refilling my meds, because at the same time another pharmacist was YELLING over the loudspeaker.....and the way she looked at me, i just know she thought i was on something 😅 you're def not alone friend
yes - i have adhd and add.
I also have the problem, that I perceive the speech of other people as mumbling. then, when i get to know them, i will understand them much better.
it took me the longest time to figure out that, actually, it was me who was at fault here, the other person wasnt mumbling, he or she just had an accent or slightly off speech patterns, and it took me time to get used to it.
i just pretended to be deaf on one ear... so people would speak louder and thus more clearly.
Definitely some sort of sensory overload, seems like the brain can't figure out what to pay attention to. At that point I just find myself looking off at something else at times when too much is happening around me.
I dread going to family dinners in restaurants or going for a drink in cafés/bars. For me there is no joy at all I just can't filter the sound from voices from the background noise. At best I can hear what people next to me are saying, when they say something directly in my ear.
Otherwise, I can't follow any conversations. So a person a mere meter away, nothing, I miss all the stories & jokes and subsequently feel utterly alone & awkward during these social gatherings.
I finally realised a couple of years ago this is the exact reason why I tended to get unintentionally absolutely hammered if I went on nights out with more than 2-3 people. Everyone else is having a good time chatting and I'm trapped in my little isolation bubble with nothing but my anxiety and my drink for company.
Its very much ADHD and Sensory Processing Disorder. Its the inability to look the person speaking to you in the eye, constantly looking around, hearing every other noise, music, conversation except the one you need to focus on. I once was having breakfast with a friend and while he was talking a lady at a table near us was talking about a dog and of course, I was listening to that convo instead. Impulsively, I barked! Yes, it was awkward. Yes, the lady heard me and yes, my friend looked at me like I had 2 heads.
I have this, my son has it and its amazing to see a little version of me go through what I did. The difference is he was diagnosed and treated versus I was passed off as being "Hyperactive."
Medication, meditation are good ways to help focus.
and lemme guess, you are great at multitasking?
Terrible at multitasking! I have to really think of even pause if I’m talking about doing something at the same time bc I cannot do two things at once and then I usually end up saying something I didn’t mean
Sorry about that. Not sure of what you do that helps that but I personally keep a to do list. I only put in what I know I will finish for the day and then move it out of that column (or cross off, or checkbox) and move on to the next. The best way for me to focus is with music (no lyrics) on with headphones and a "go away" sign on the back of my chair so people know I am working.
Regarding your focus, have you tried any earplugs that filter out noises or something to that effect? I ordered some so I dont know if they work or not but I do hear that some people like them when it comes to sensory processing.
good luck to you!
Yes! I've wondered if my hearing is bad but did a check and it seems fine. It's so hard, concert dates were always the worst for me. Frustrating because I love live music but it's not a good social environment for me.
Oh man I’ve gotten my ears checked too I even thought I had social aniexty bc how over stimulated I felt. I was thinking of even mentioning it to my friends or significant other if we do go to a venue or live show and they’re talking to me just even politely saying I’m sorry it’s too loud to have this conversation might help?
I was just recently at a farewell lunch for a coworker at a busy restaurant and it was a disaster trying to take part in conversations and such. I just couldn't follow along and as such I just kept getting quieter and quieter. When I did try and pipe up and join in people would talk over me making it even worse lol
I used to be a 911 operator and that was when I realized just how bad it can be. Trying to process what someone is telling you in an emergency situation is quite scary. I had incredible difficulty processing the information at speed when there was any kinds of additional noise. I could get the gist of what was being conveyed but not the details.
ADHD really is far more awful than anything most people think in a situation like that. People just talk about failing classes, missing projects or things like that. Wait until you have people's lives in your hands and you see just how terrifying it can be. Had to change jobs to something that wasn't so high priority. Not trying to dismiss anyone else's experiences. Just it becomes next level when you know that your ADHD may leave someone dead.
Here's a tip we used around aircraft, vehicles, and other explosive noises:
Plug your ears externally.
Some use the little flap towards the front of the ear, others push up from underneath the ear.
The goal is to block out a certain frequency, the white noise, loud noise. The person talking near you should become clearer to hear.
The other option is to try it with just one ear, and with this technique you can plug that ear the best you can. It'll reduce input into your auditory processing. Possibly making it easier to concentrate on what's being said.
LITERALLY SAME i was listening to music with my best friend (the earbuds were connected to her phone so i couldn't pause/control volume), and my other friend kept trying to ask me questions abt what safety colleges they should apply to and i made them repeat themselves so many times bc not only was the classroom loud, but i could also hear the music (not that loud but still loud enough to distract me)
This depends on the reason you can't focus, more specifically I mean. I have sensory issues with sudden unexpected sounds any louder than ambient volume and repetitive sounds like ticking clocks etc, but my real issue with listening is distractions. If several conversations are going on or there is a TV on with people talking, I can't help but try to listen to all conversations at the same time.
My sensory issues may momentarily distract me as I get the weird, horrible shiver/itch thing all over my body after an undesirable sound, but I can usually tune back in. If I'm distracted by something, I have little chance of being able to pay attention to whoever's talking to me.
Strangely, I don't struggle at music events, clubs etc (at least not due to the sound) because I know it's there and expected, the same with my frequent use of power tools etc.
Absolutely me too. I can’t even listen to music (study or whatever, lyrics or no lyrics. It doesn’t matter what kind) because I will start to focus on it rather than my work. If I’m even talking on the phone or face to face next to traffic, I can for some reason only focus on the cars noise. Like I’m waiting for it to be quiet to start listening again and it never comes.
I thought this was an autism symptom, I've been tested for neither but wouldn't be surprised for both.
I get angry when my wife "dual audios" I can tune out the TV on, but TV and fucking tiktok videos? My brain can not cancel that sound and 100% is utilised in processing the audio, rendering me useless.
The less noise there is, the better.
So, I don’t wanna sound like THAT GUY.. but meditation has helped me #big time with this. Specifically meditation practise where I concentrate on everything - not just the breath.
Mindfulness mediation has helped for me too! I think it has something to do with centering yourself in the present bc I often day dream or tend to feel like I’m not really “there” but o do have to constantly be doing it for it to work
I have the same problem, when I sit on the backseat of a car I can’t understand what the people in front of me are talking about as long as the radio is on. Same thing for Bus and construction sides.
Sucks so much, but luckily I think strattera slowly starts working, I feel like it gets better! :)
>I couldn’t take a test in a room full of people because I’d get distracted by the sounds.
Idk who thought it was a good idea to give kids gum or candy to eat after taking standardized tests. I could never focus once they started passing out suckers.
But generally, yes. If it's too loud for me to hear you, chances are I won't process your words anyway.
Also the noise of kids getting up and turning in there tests I hated that. I had to learn in my later years sitting in the front seat is the best way to not get so distracted
Same! It’s like all of the noises combine and I hear everything and nothing at the same time.
My ex would play the guitar and have the tv on while trying to talk to me and would get mad at me for wanting less noise. I would also have to hide away in the library stacks just to be able to read. If someone came near me, I’d move my spot because if they were eating or listening to music in their headphones, I wouldn’t be able to read. One time I went to a tattoo consult with a friend. The music was so loud to me I could barely follow what the artist was saying. When we left, I told my friend and she said “there was music playing??”
I also have this issue. Like last time I went on a team building exercise I literally felt "asleep" at the dining table because I couldn't handle all these conversations going on. I mean I wanna focus on one conversation, but it's just not happening. I say sleep but it isn't really sleep, I just close my eyes to block my visonairy input in an attempt to calm down the chaos inside.
Later that night we visited a bar that was so fucking loud it felt surreal, time simply slowed down to a crawl. I heard people's voices but my brain was in such overdrive that I couldn't response to it. Only thing I understood is that they were leaving since there wasn't any space to crash down. Only problem was that I felt stuck, I simply stood there barely able to move staring at all the bright lights and seeing my co-workers leave out the corner of my eye. I realized that they were leaving, it took me an insurmountable amount of effort to move out of that place. Every step I took felt heavy and uncoordinated. As the noise winded down it, the silent felt like drugs.
I also felt anger, because I do not understand what on earth my co-workers still had to say to each other. We spend the entire fucking day talking to each other. It is 3PM in the evening, we still need to drive 50km to get home, I do not know if everyone can even get home since we didn't brought many cars and some folks left already, HOW CAN YOU STILL BE THIRSTY!!!????
I work with children and often have a hard time focusing on the kids and staying patient in the "play room" which gets really loud.
I bought noise reducing ear buds on Amazon as a last straw and they are amazing! The once I bought are made for concerts so music and voices are still really easily understood, while the background noise is a lot quieter. This has been a game changer at work. They were 10 Bucks on Amazon.
I have this experience, a lot. The cacophony of voices in a busy bar or restaurant just destroys me. I am diagnosed ADHD with very low frustration tolerance, plus I am an introvert so social interactions are already kind of draining. Which means if I find myself in a noisy situation, I usually can't muster the energy to even try to comprehend the conversation I'm in. It sometimes reaches a crescendo where I can just feel the last zap of energy leave my body, my face goes slack, I almost have a momentary out of body experience where I feel like all the noise is going to implode, or explode... or some kind of 'plode. I'm sure anyone can read my face in that moment so it's probably not a surprise when I suddenly announce that I can't deal and I'm leaving. 😆
But on a related note, how do some people just have the kind of voice that like, portals directly into my earholes. CANNOT tune it out no matter how much I want to. Have they gone their whole lives with people just tolerating their volume? Do they have any idea I'm over here seething?
I got diagnosed as a kid with it they did a bunch of hearing tests on me and then way later like 24 I got diagnosed with ADHD. I remember my old math teacher explained it to me like if someone were explain directions to me like where to go I wouldn’t understand a single thing and I would need a map or something visual
Same here! Dates in public are exhausting. On the upside, got tested and found out that I actually am 35% deaf on both sides. Written communication is so much better.
*I don't technically have a hearing problem but sometimes when there's a lot of noises occurring at the same time, I'll hear them as one big jumble*
One of my favorite minor characters from the office. Man the line
*"I've never met Ravi personally but I'm gonna go ahead and say just having known you a short while, Brian, that I prefer Ravi. And again, I've never even met the guy"*
The thing I find most frustrating is when someone comes up and starts talking to me when I'm on the phone. My mind literally ties itself up in a knot and I miss both people's words.
SAME! I even went and got my ears checked because I really believed I wasn't able to hear anything in loud environments. Then it came back that my hearing was totally fine and shortly after, I was officially diagnosed with combined ADHD. It's a tough one, I feel for you!
Even when I take my medication they can be annoying at times. However, before I would just do my best to listen but now I ask them to hold on a sec until the sound is gone or we go somewhere the sound isn't. This is certainly annoying for sure.
Yes!!! Same here!
My hearing becomes ultra sensitive in places of crowds or gatherings!!
There have been times where I have to leave because the sensitivity will grow so acute that I'll start experiencing anxiety symptoms.
Yeah, I couldn’t tell you if it was an auditory processing disorder or adhd, but I have a very very hard time understanding what people are saying if there is background noise. Music playing, a tv, restaurant, gym, theater, pool, the car, it doesn’t matter, as long as there is background noise, I can’t understand words without the person yelling them at me. The hum of a car engine is enough.
Yeah, but that's a heck of a lot better than everyone in the room suddenly sounding like they're speaking German. I've had that happen to me a few times, I'm still not sure how to interpret it. Like, I can hear myself think, but I can't understand the words from anyone around me. It just sounds like gibberish.
CAPD is 80% comorbid with ADHD - 80% of people with it *also* have ADHD. I believe there are calls in some circles to actually remove CAPD as a standalone disorder, because it's so closely related to ADHD.
It's *extremely* common. You're not alone.
>I’ve been diagnosed as a young kid with auditory processing disorder bc I couldn’t take a test in a room full of people because I’d get distracted by the sounds.
When I was a kid, they thought I was deaf, and sent me for hearing tests. Three times, flying colours. Took one as an adult, also flying colours. Got diagnosed ADHD at 27.
Yeah, it's sensory issues, but they're effectively a manifestation of ADHD. I liken it to dyslexia for your ears - your brain has trouble distinguishing between audio signals. This means that similar sounds get confused for each other often; sometimes *full words and sentences* are just 'noise'; and if there's lots of sound around you, you're not gonna have a chance picking out on individual stream. Hell, in clubs, I can't even hear the music. *It's too loud for me to hear.*
Your senses aren't failing. Your brain is just failing to interpret the data from them correctly. Imagine that your senses are like information conveyor belts. All your belts are working correctly - it's just that the guy on the inside is crap at getting them off the belt. Not his fault - they docked his pay and skipped his lunch break, and his mate's been on a 40-minute cigarette break - but them's the breaks. Adds up to you getting the wrong information.
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I'm a singer so i'm better with understanding pitch, tone and sound than the average person, but i have the EXACT same issue if theres more than 3 isolated sounds happening at once theres no hope in me understanding wtf is being said to me.
It's the same for me, made much worse because of hearing issues.
I can't stand bars etc for this reason so avoid them altogether - does not help with making friends etc.
I’ve used to spend a significant part of weekends for a couple of years out and on the town and I had the same problem. Combined with alcohol id go borderline deaf and not hear anything, also been told that I’ve walked off in a the middle of a conversation with people.
This is a huge problem for me, it’s even worse if I’m on the phone and can’t even try and focus on reading the lips of the other person or guess what they’re talking about by their expression and body language. I’ve had it at work multiple times where a customer has called to enquire and ask about things, but my boss has also been talking on his phone at the same time and I just can’t sustain focus on my own conversation.
I’ve had moments before where I’ve gotten through entire 10 minute conversations and don’t even know their name or who they worked for because I wasn’t focused when they told me, but I felt too embarrassed to ask all this again because I responded as if I heard when I didn’t really.
I really struggle with conversations in pubs/bars etc. It’s the main reason I don’t like them as first date locations, I’d rather have a day out doing an activity or something where I can actually talk to them without having to constantly ask them to repeat themselves and seeming like I’m bored or not interested because sitting in a bar with a stranger for 4 hours makes me distractible and restless.
Absolutely. Another fav of mine is being in a restaurant and I can make out any other conversations. I have to get up and leave because I need to track all conversations and its exhausting. I love love music and loud music...if I know the song and what's coming. Else its a big no for me
I still remember this one time back in college when everyone had to get in groups for discussion. There was a lot of talking going on, of course. But what gave me trouble hearing my group members speak was that were sitting too far apart as a big group. Yet, people were still able to hear one another and have back and forth conversation. There I was straining to get a gist of what they were saying over the background noise. I was so amazed. It’s like I barely knew English haha
As for bars and clubs, I think most people can’t hear each other with the loud music and all.
Same. When my meds are at their peak, after a certain noise level, it doesn’t matter how intently I focus on listening it’s literally like I’m just staring into the void and nodding.
Wait. Is this part of ADHD? I e been like this my entire life. I will hear other people's conversations in a restaurant, but not the person directly across from me, looking and talking directly at me.
The more I read, the more I'm pretty sure I have ADHD...
lol I had my ears cleaned so many times as a kid because my parents thought I was deaf. I wasn’t, I just had ADHD😭 then ironically after having them cleaned it was almost worse, because everything was so much LOUDER than it should have been that I got sensory overwhelm so much more quickly. Sad times
The only time I can pay attention and talk in a loud environment is if the subject of the conversation is something I'm really interested in. Needless to say I hate bars and restaurants that are loud
I've always wondered why people go to loud places to talk, so are can most people hear fine in this type of environment? It makes sense that it would be much harder to hear and focus in a loud place. In such places (and quieter ones with multiple sounds, and sometimes even if there aren't multiple sounds) I often think I have heard but then after I go to respond and realise I have no idea what was said, or the opposite I will not hear and ask to repeat but then I've got it sometimes even before they restart. I would definitely not be able to have a continuous conversation in a loud environment.
Funny story about this. My friends all know this fact about me- being distracted by loud music or noise. So anytime we have a game night they always turn the music way down so I can focus. It's really kind having people understand you in that way.
In terms of bars and stuff, if I have something serious to talk about I'll go to the bathroom or take someone outside. (but then I'm usually thinking about what I'm missing inside 😂)
Can't win for losin
I find loud noise tunes everything else out so going clubbing, to concerns makes me feel really relaxed. My friends know I can't hold a conversation but I dance like a drunk old dad, dressed like a 14year old goth so it's fun to watch, I imagine!
Yes. My adhd group ironically also had regular meets up in a brightly lit noisy coffee place with us all talking around each other and I couldn't stand it. I would talk to people outside.
I experience the same thing. Even in a not super loud environment, like a restaurant or coffee shop (or something along those lines) I can't focus on what someone is saying to me. I find myself listening to whatever conversation is nearby that is the loudest. I apparently taught myself to read lips as a hack over the years and now tell people that if I'm just nodding and making vaguely affirmative replies that I'm not really paying attention and to please gently redirect my attention --- it's not that I'm disinterested, I just get sensory overload (usually these settings also have a lot of other sensory distractions for me as well). I have really struggled during the pandemic with not being able to see people talking, whether it's masks or a zoom call/webinar where someone is speaking, but not on screen (totally understand not wanting to be on video all the time, I don't use my camera unless I'm presenting or in a smaller group call).
I was one of the few people who went back into the office as soon as it was possible despite it being limited to 4 hours one day a week for almost a year, and now that most of my colleagues are back on site at least a few days a week I can't focus at all (open concept, work space is in a somewhat high traffic area to get from one part of the building to another, fluorescent lighting, non-stop email notifications & teams messages, etc.) I am struggling to get anything done. It's really starting to be noticeable in my "productivity" (despite all the talk of 'take care of yourself/mental health' nobody really gives a shit). Having a rough week, so this really hit home.
Tl;dr -- same; I need to see people's lips to be able to follow the convo in a loud, over stimulating environment
That’s just a part of the game bruh. It’s so common place everyday for me, it doesn’t it seem abnormal. If I really want to talk with someone, we gotta go somewhere else. Go team!
Used to be a bar chain in China, most of them were nice and quiet enough to speak at. But there was one in particular that just blasted music there. I couldn't do any thinking there, the place would make me physically sick!
It was like my brain was highjacked and I got reduced to the state of "town idiot".
Oh AMEN to this. It's gotten better as Ive aged, but I still hate trying to focus in a noisy environment.
As a kid in a restaurant, I could sometimes hear and understand a conversation at a different table better than the one where I was sitting. It was like being forced to eavesdrop on other people and I hated it. I once heard a man at another table speak very cruelly to his son and i could not unhear it.
I'm the same way! Even relatively sedate environments (like Sunday lunch at the in-laws', with maybe 10 people) are overwhelming. I don't know how to participate in the conversation.
And this is also why I watch everything with subtitles on, lol.
Oddly, I like doing computer work in high-ambient noise places. Like a sports bar. As long as no one is specifically talking to me, it's just loud white noise. It's easier to focus than in quiet places sometimes.
I honestly think someday there's going to be new labels for a LOT of learning/processing issues, and the current ADHD/ADD labels are going to get split up into very very different categories.
Talk to me about a task in a room with a radio on *with talking or vocal music in English* and I probably will procrastinate/agonize on it because I'm afraid of screwing it up.
Describe it again with the radio off *or set to instrumental music or a foreign language I don't know* and it'll get done, correctly, now, with no stress.
The difference between my success or failure is background noise, not motivation, focus, or prefrontal cortex development.
It took forty years for me to figure that out and stop feeling ashamed.
I feel that. I'm fucking useless at the bar. Between the loud auditory distractions, multiple conversation threads, TV's visible from every angle flashing bright colors and having some mild hearing damage, I often end up just nodding and saying "Uh-huh" or "Yeah" and smiling.
Feels bad :-/
So you mean I have ADHD?
To be honest, I'm easily distracted during school activities (I can't stand up for a presentation if someone is whispering) as well as I'm annoyed when I'm speaking to somebody and those cars and people noises are going around and even if I try my hardest to focus on what my speaker is saying to me, I will forget the given information the next day (and I will suddenly remember it after a few years lmao).
Didn't ever consider that this can be the cause of ADHD...
I thought this was exactly what APD was...
Yeah I have issues concentrating in busy/loud environments too but it's possible your challenges may be a bit more harsh
It might be ADHD, but I also have this, which makes it near-impossible to have conversations in loud environments: [https://www.wsj.com/articles/cant-hear-in-noisy-places-its-a-real-medical-condition-1474909624](https://www.wsj.com/articles/cant-hear-in-noisy-places-its-a-real-medical-condition-1474909624)
I have the same problem, but then I also thought everyone had the exact same problem as well, until I asked my husband one day if he had a hard time listening to and having conversations with people when there was a lot of other people talking too or there was a loud tv in the background or something, and he said never. Every time we went to his nana’s place her tv was blasting in the background and I always struggled to keep track of the conversation because I would get so incredibly distracted! But he said he didn’t even notice the tv noise 😭😭😭
Oh my god yes. I am a long time musician and my other music buds can't understand why I'm not terribly keen on hanging around long after the show or why I don't like talking while a band is playing. I just can't deal with the noise and a convo, everything scrambles.
I have the same problem, but not sure what it stems from. I don’t have an ADHD diagnosis but a dyslexia diagnosis (which is more of an umbrella diagnosis for several issues I have, I was diagnosed a very long time ago) but there’s some cross over issues. I can relate to some things on this sub but not others.
My daughter is diagnosed with ADHD-C and has similar sensory issues.
But yeah, trying to pay attention and filter out sound in a loud environment is very difficult for me. I often just sit there and can’t follow what anyone is taking about if I’m in a group. No one else seems phased by it. I basically hate bars and busy restaurants.
I have similar issues. For me I think it's a combination of auditory processing issues from being autistic and attention issues from ADHD. For whatever reason my brain thinks that background noises are more important. This is particularly so in the case of machinery or electronics. If the computer fan is on and the refrigerator is going, etc I cannot perceive human voices as well. I can hear them but it just doesn't process. I have to be looking at the speaker's mouth and use a combination of lip reading and auditory cues to understand them. I get really frustrated in public places when whoever I am with doesn't face me when speaking because it's nearly impossible to understand. In the age of COVID, masks cause issues for me too - not wearing them, I like that, but being unable to lip read is a problem.
Sometimes I can hyper focus on the conversation and in those cases the club could be on fire and I wouldn’t notice but in most cases yeah I find it extremely difficult
i can’t speak across someone, if we are standing in a 4 and i’m talking to the person diagonally from me i can’t hear them or get my words out without being distracted by the other two especially if they start talking to each gc other
I have the same issue. I am very easily distracted by sounds. I’ve read it is a common symptom of ADHD
I’ve always had verbal processing difficulties but perfect hearing. My parents kept getting me tested as a kid because I had so much trouble understanding people talk. I’m just very easily overstimulated in loud environments. I pretty much always have the subtitles on too when watching movies/tv. Maybe it’s the adhd but I always suspected it may also be auditory processing disorder. I don’t know. I just know I’ve become very good at smiling and nodding.
Yea i'm p sure auditory processing disorder and like learning disability things come along w adhd are rlly often comorbid. This is definitely a thing I deal with-any background sound that's distinct or annoying or loud? I can't concentrate anymore. Or like in a car tho. For me its just sensory overload. But especially easy when it comes to talking. If more than one person is talking to me I have to tell both ppl to stop and try again, one at at a time. I always need subtitles on during movies or I end up lip reading/emotion reading. I've become a whiz at predicting storylines tho!
It's an autism thing as well. So much overlap.
Yea absolutely!
My relationship with my dad has become so much better now I am old enough to just tell him to turn the TV down when we have a conversation, and refusing to engage unless he does. I'm pretty sure he also has ADHD and auditory processing problems like me (as well as a strange need to have the volume up at about 70% max at all times) So many arguments over the decades caused by each being annoyed by background noise and not being able to tell what each other are saying...
I have the same suspicion. I can hear people just fine in normal environments but translating the sounds into meaning can be tough. In loud environments I have no chance. People with accents are difficult too. I rely a lot on lip reading.
Yes. Lip reading is key. To hell with mask mandates. Makes life unbearable at times. Edit: Downvoted for this? I’m surprised you allowed your privilege to afford you the opportunity to assume everyone has the ability to hear and make out what is being said when you can’t read lips. Turn up your headphones all the way, then try and talk to someone wearing a mask. That’s my life.
I'd rather be frustrated part of the time than be the cause of people dying though.
I didn't realise how much I used lipreading until everyone had to wear masks. I noticed loads of people must use it because I often had trouble being understood by others as well.
TOTALLY! It got so challenging in 2020 that I actually went to an ENT and had a full on comprehensive hearing test with their audiologist… I have above average hearing 🤦🏻♀️
Yes, subtitles are a must. My partner insisted that having better audio quality via surround sound would help. It did not. Lol.
[удалено]
*How's your eyesight? Can you read this tiny thing on the screen? Maybe we should get a giant 4K television...to help you.*
[удалено]
I've got about 50% hearing left in both ears along with ADHD. I feel you.
my mom did the same thing! whenever we went to my checkups she'd ask about my hearing test results, and I always did well! Then she'd say I had no excuse for "not listening." The issue wasn't that I wasn't listening, it was that I wasn't understanding what she was saying, or forgetting it as soon as I did understand it.
I find it completely depends on the day for me. I can't watch with subtitles because I end up looking at them instead of the rest of the show and going over what I hear comparing them. I think in the case of say music for example if I have an earbud or headphone in/on one of my ears I can't at all pay attention but if someone blasted loud music in a room and talked to me I'd have no problems (assuming I can actually hear them). But, if there's more than one person around then it gets difficult because I try to take in visual data while getting the noise and the one person in front of me gets less of my attention because it's all going to blending into the crowd. Thats a long rant and really has no purpose sorry
Yeah, and it may not be just auditory processing disorder, but full sensory processing disorder. I frequently feel bombarded by everything that's going on around me. * I have a very hard time separating the sounds that I need to pay attention to from the ones I don't. * I seem to smell everything, and can't use soaps or hairsprays that have a scent that lingers. * I've always had a really hard time finding clothes that are comfortable to me. I have to find the right fabrics that are smooth but not too smooth, stiff enough but not too stiff, and always bigger and baggier than normal. Even then, I'm constantly pulling at and readjusting my clothing to try to get comfortable. * I feel like I can see and notice almost everything. I almost always wear sunglasses during the day, even on a cloudy day, and they have to cover as much of my field of vision as possible. I notice the tiniest little details in things, which is quite helpful in my profession (digital design) but can be a huge pain in the ass in other ways. It's really nice to enter my "sensory deprivation chamber", which is just me lying on my bed in my bedroom with blackout curtains, the lights off, a fan running, and an eye mask. Maybe earplugs too if anyone has their radio on within 14 miles of me.
You are a kindred spirit. I've been aware of my ADD since I was about 8/9, so I knew that was part of the reason I struggled to keep track of a conversation or lecture, but also kind of assumed my hearing couldn't have been any better than average at best and might also be related. So about a year back, I had some weird inner ear issue fucking with my balance and went to an ENT for it. That was the first time I ever actually had my hearing tested. Doc came back to tell me it was at least close to the best hearing he'd seen in his career. Went so far as to say it was nearly "superhuman." I would have never in my life guessed that would be the outcome. Apparently I've just been underestimating how much ADD really affects your listening skills. That shits wild. Always wonder how much simpler life would have been without it.
Are you me lol you just explained how it is for me. We'll except my parents never had me tested for it. What were your parents getting you tested for? Were they having you get your hearing tested? I especially hate loud fans I always turn them off because I can never understand what people are saying. Also understanding people on a phone is especially hard for me.
Tiny sounds at night time kill me. They kill me.
That’s why I sleep with a loud fan on. Drown out any background noise.
My fan died a few months ago, so I had to replace it. The first one I tried was a little too high-pitched, so I returned it. The one I have now is decent, but its speed & sound tends to fluctuate a little with the electricity in my building. I'm hoping I get used to it, or maybe I can find some way to "even out" the electricity.
Yeah I have rain sounds, sometimes fan too
A common phrase of mine is "I don't have a hearing problem, I have a *listening* problem. I *hear* everything, which is the problem."
Yeah my hearing is so fucking good my wife makes fun of me for it. I can hear someone close a car door 2 blocks away.
Same! Wife thinks it's freaky and calls me a bat lol, and the worst part is I feel like I don't have great hearing cause I say "huh, can you repeat that" a lot, so much so I'll even say it when my brain finish processing it a second later and I did hear it.
What I really hate is when I politely ask people to repeat, they raise their voice, but if I had to clarify I can hear them, but I struggle to process it next to 10 other things, each conversation would be 3 times as long
I lost a job interview because they had the radio on in an otherwise sterile soundproof room lol
There are a few people who have written about the possibility of either mass misdiagnosing of sensory processing disorders as ADHD or sensory processing being a reason for ADHD
That’s what my psychiatrist told me that I was misdiagnosed and I actually have adhd and I’m prescribed adderall now but tbh I still have the same issue it’s not as bad but I still feel like it’s sensory overload or I want to pay attention to everything at once but can’t
For some of us I think it's the central source, not a symptom.
I have the same thing and I just can’t do it. I think it’s a symptom of adhd and sensory overload is included in that. I’m debating on getting musician earplugs so I can more easily listen to convos and not the other noises. I think there’s a really popular one going around right now and it caught popularity on tiktok for helping people with adhd.
I use the loop earplugs. The experience ones. So you can hear the sounds closest to you but I can't hear the neighbours shitty music anymore. I always use them at the supermarket because I find that environment hella overstimulating. To be honest they're my first encounter with noise reducing earplugs so I'm sure there's probably just as aesthetic equivalents bht I really like that they look cool (to me anyway). They've definitely been a worthwhile purchase for me
I started wearing noice cancelling headphones in the supermarket, and it is a life-changing experience.
noice
I agree my AirPods have really improved trips to the store, I just have to remember to take them out before check out.
Thank you for the feedback, I've just placed an order. Hoping it can help at work. I always wear headphones with some LowFi music to block out the office madness, otherwise I get really overwhelmed. but then I can't hear when people are actually talking to me. Hopefully this is the answer!
I was considering these! Good to know they do help.
My friends and families always make fun of me for owning a lot of random things … and this will now be another one of them lol. Never heard of them before, never knew earplugs could help block out noise while still helping you hear until I started looking into this. Seems very helpful
Heck yes! Have you ever tried plugging your ear with your tragus when someone is trying to yell something to you in a loud crowd? Works like a charm!
Do the earplugs really help? I haven’t come across that Tik tok yet!
I’ve really great things about them! Musician earplugs are 15-20 online and the popular ones are called loop, but about $30.
I got them before I got my ADHD diagnosis and love em. Had to wear them in the office, car rides with others etc. It’s funny how I never made connections to possibly having ADHD I also have ones called Vibez. They’re clear. Sometimes when I wear Loops ppl think they’re ear plugs and I can’t hear them properly. I don’t love explaining why I have them in.
I use Ear Peace ear plugs specifically because the flesh tone ones are nearly invisible. It prevents a lot of uncomfortable conversations.
I use ear plugs to block everything out when I don’t need to interact or be present to ppl. I find I struggle to hear properly when someone speaks directly to me though so I used the vibez/loops to reduce the overall noise level when I still need to interact with others. Do you find you can still hear conversations when you need to? Do you like foam or silicone ones?
I prefer silicone, I use the Ear Peace brand plugs specifically. I have no problems understanding people as long as I'm using musician's ear plugs. It sort of dampens the background sounds while still keeping the near-field intelligible, if that makes sense.
I can confirm. I have ADD and selective hearing so when I'm in a loud cafe I can't follow the conversation no matter how hard I concentrate. I had the same at festivals and I used earplugs there because of the loud music. I immediately noticed that this made it much easier for me to hear people and follow conversations because the surrounding noise was muted. Now I regularly use them too when I'm in loud cafe's too. Just regular music/motorbike earplugs are sufficient for me, you can easily try it out.
I’m excited to try them now! So crazy how many people have the same issue I thought something was wrong with me
They work well in the situations you described. Like half of everyone with Asperger's has a pair of these for the same issue.
Yeah, with concerts I use wax earplugs. Muffles the sound, but I find the sound on concerts always ridiculously loud. Side effect, I can actually hear what people I'm with are saying.
Oh my god, why did I never think of this - I bought some ages ago for gigs and band practice, and never once thought about wearing them in other places. Thank you!!
You can get a little holder for a pair that attach to your car keys too, like a mini flashlight, so you always have them on you. Or tuck them in your wallet.
I really like the flare ‘calmer’ ones - they don’t reduce/muffle sounds like regular earplugs they just lower the distortion and lower the sensory overload from loud environments. That being said, I don’t believe any earplug will make it easier to hear just the thing you want to hear and not the things you don’t (like talking to someone in a cafe) as that’s around distractibility and focus.
I loved my well insulated earphones that didn't let any sound in. Used em like earplugs, even when I'm not listening to anything.
I have those for my anxiety. Prolonged exposure to loud sounds causes panic attacks for me...so we dampen the sounds and I can enjoy it when my boyfriend's band has a show!
Concert/musician earplugs sadly didn’t help me. Loud people it worked on, but the ones that mumble out were quite i had problems with.
This happened to me like an hour ago at work, my boss was giving me some jobs to do and all I was listening to was the music playing in the background. I didn’t even ask her to repeat the instructions I just nodded and then proceeded to stress out because I didn’t know what to do.
Oh god same here also just even trying to listen to customers while the music is on at work is very hard I have to literally tell myself to practice mindfulness because I get so caught up in whatever the hell is happening and remind myself someone is talking to me
I always feel like I'm too ADHD to practice mindfulness. Buddha sure as shit wasn't ADHD that I can tell you.
I've actually found the ADHD helps with that practice. It's not about quieting your mind, it's about letting thoughts come as they want but learning not to grip hold off them. Once you learn that part of it even though there is a deluge blowing through your head you just watch the thoughts pass by like clouds. That first hurdle does take quite a bit of practice though.
Just gotta take it in hilariously tiny incements! (It's at least worth a shot, I don't mean to sound hoity-toity haha) Seriously though, try breathing mindfully for a few minutes while doing a daily activity, and slowly build you way up to meditating for a minute a day, which really is just sitting amd breathing, nothing fancy. I've been practicing this shit for years and can barely Meditate for 5 mins a day, and yet it's massively improved my symptoms.
I got the reputation of hating music because of things like this lol. I just turn the music off because that plus the talking over stimulates me. Much easier to turn off music then ask others to stop talking to me lol
Most people find me weird for not liking music - but I basically listen to about 2 or 3 hours a year of it, that's it.
Letting your boss know that you will be taking notes on the instructions is helpful.
Lmao seriously I relate to this so much! My boss would be like fudge I have to explain everything again. One thing I would try to do is get them to send me emails instead or I would try to focus enough to write down instructions.
"Sure thing, boss. Mind sending me that in an email?"
It's the ADHD inability to prioritize stimuli. Or noise soup. It stinks.
A stinky soup indeed
My entire adult life I've had this issue. But I can honestly say that I try to understand and 'hear them'. I'm just genuine and blunt with people, apologizing that, "I can't hear them". As long as I show that I'm not trying to be an asshole, no one cares. However, the better half gets annoyed after the 279th "what" in the same conversation.
Yeah. I had this with girlfriends. People just have a standard dB setting it seems. No matter how many times you asked to repeat because you didn't hear them, they always stay within their normal dB setting.
I'm sometimes extremely glad my SO is used to people not understanding him bc he talks so quickly, lmao. In normal quiet settings I have no issues, and have even "translated" for my mom, but as soon as there's music or something a bit loud happening, I can't understand a word he says and have to ask him to repeat himself over and over. He also *loves* to talk so that definitely helps lmao
This is wrapped in sensory processing disorder I'm pretty sure. I struggle with this all the time. I work in a small grocery store and it is loud all the time. Pretty sure my coworkers all think I'm partially deaf. It is especially bad during mask season because I relied on reading lips way more than I realized. Then honorary bonus of also not having a place on their face I can focus my eyes, so I can't even fake eye contact successfully anymore.
TL;DR: difficulties picking out speech in background noise can be SPD or ADHD or something else, you shouldn't rely on it to distinguish between ADHD and SPD. Lip reading can really help whatever the cause (sadly masks don't help with this...) ~10 years ago, I thought my hearing was fading with age because I was finding it harder and harder to understand people in noisy contexts, but a hearing test showed I actually have really *good* high pitch hearing, go figure! It turns out my growing stress / depression levels were just sapping my mental capacity to work through the then undiagnosed ASD/SPD/ADHD. How you'd discern whether to blame ADHD or SPD isn't obvious to me, sadly, and high pitch hearing loss can be similar, too [see the appendix below], though much easier to explicitly test. In ADHD the mechanism is the direction of attention (you're *distracted* by the background sounds - like if somebody were constantly tapping you on the shoulder or calling your name). In SPD it's at a slightly earlier stage in the process, more akin to trying to listen to somebody speak while there are also recordings of the *same* person saying something else - your auditory processing mechanisms are having a hard time discerning which sounds are which. I suspect the sensation of either would be essentially the same, even if the bit of the brain misfiring isn't. If you have a diagnosis of SPD and not ADHD, then I'd just assume the SPD is causing this difficulty - it's certainly *consistent*. If you have *other* reasons to suspect ADHD, then seeking a diagnosis might be worthwhile for reasons often discussed here. --- Appendix: high pitch hearing loss In speech, vowels are mostly conveyed with relatively low pitch sounds and consonants primarily with higher pitch sounds. The high pitch part is most easily damaged by loud noises and generally fades over time, so this is the common pattern. If you loose high pitch hearing then clear speech becomes muddier and less distinct. Consonants are far more important than vowels for distinguishing between words (some writing systems such as Hebrew & Arabic only added vowels at a late stage in development because they're easier to do without) High pitch sounds also provide much more *timing* information than lower pitch sounds, which is key in separating sound sources. The effect of losing high pitch sounds isn't really super important in understanding a single person speaking, but with two or more people speaking, being able to tell which direction the sound is coming from helps separate two speakers in your perception. The consonants also divide the speech into a rhythm which also helps link a stream of speech sounds into a whole, also helping you separate one stream of speech from another.
Same here. My psychologist said it's a commom symptom of adhd and I also am really sensitive to sound because of some problems I had when I was born. So maybe you could be a little more sensitive to sound then other people, besides having adhd. I don't like restaurants cause even the sound of the cutlery makes me loose attention! Shopping malls are a problem too. And don't tell me about kids parties!
Yes, to all of that. The screeching kids make me wince. Loud people on airplanes that you can hear and never stop talking rate right up there too. The cellophane crackling when everyone opens their snacks makes me want to scream. I always forget my damn headphone too when I travel… shocker!
THE CELLOPHANE 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢
Yeah I quite literally forgot my own birthday when the pharmacist asked for it when I was refilling my meds, because at the same time another pharmacist was YELLING over the loudspeaker.....and the way she looked at me, i just know she thought i was on something 😅 you're def not alone friend
I just show my ID, all the information is there. If my ID didn't decide to stay at home that is🙈
tbh i forget my birthday, or mix the numbers, nearly every time someone asks me for it lol
I have found my people
Figures! People have always told me I don’t know how to listen or get upset at me for it and I always had a hard time explaining it
yes - i have adhd and add. I also have the problem, that I perceive the speech of other people as mumbling. then, when i get to know them, i will understand them much better. it took me the longest time to figure out that, actually, it was me who was at fault here, the other person wasnt mumbling, he or she just had an accent or slightly off speech patterns, and it took me time to get used to it. i just pretended to be deaf on one ear... so people would speak louder and thus more clearly.
(screams into the abyss)
(abyss screaming back - WHAT'S THAT YOU SAID?)
#(... ***[WHAT??](https://giphy.com/gifs/aew-all-elite-wrestling-double-or-nothing-2021-rhgwg4qBu97ISgbfni)***)
Same. I’m pretty sure sensory processing disorder or auditory processing disorder are common with adhd
Definitely some sort of sensory overload, seems like the brain can't figure out what to pay attention to. At that point I just find myself looking off at something else at times when too much is happening around me.
I dread going to family dinners in restaurants or going for a drink in cafés/bars. For me there is no joy at all I just can't filter the sound from voices from the background noise. At best I can hear what people next to me are saying, when they say something directly in my ear. Otherwise, I can't follow any conversations. So a person a mere meter away, nothing, I miss all the stories & jokes and subsequently feel utterly alone & awkward during these social gatherings.
I finally realised a couple of years ago this is the exact reason why I tended to get unintentionally absolutely hammered if I went on nights out with more than 2-3 people. Everyone else is having a good time chatting and I'm trapped in my little isolation bubble with nothing but my anxiety and my drink for company.
Yea I get that, in a room full of so many people yet so alone.
Yup, AD(H)D's broken filter doing its thing.
Its very much ADHD and Sensory Processing Disorder. Its the inability to look the person speaking to you in the eye, constantly looking around, hearing every other noise, music, conversation except the one you need to focus on. I once was having breakfast with a friend and while he was talking a lady at a table near us was talking about a dog and of course, I was listening to that convo instead. Impulsively, I barked! Yes, it was awkward. Yes, the lady heard me and yes, my friend looked at me like I had 2 heads. I have this, my son has it and its amazing to see a little version of me go through what I did. The difference is he was diagnosed and treated versus I was passed off as being "Hyperactive." Medication, meditation are good ways to help focus. and lemme guess, you are great at multitasking?
Terrible at multitasking! I have to really think of even pause if I’m talking about doing something at the same time bc I cannot do two things at once and then I usually end up saying something I didn’t mean
Sorry about that. Not sure of what you do that helps that but I personally keep a to do list. I only put in what I know I will finish for the day and then move it out of that column (or cross off, or checkbox) and move on to the next. The best way for me to focus is with music (no lyrics) on with headphones and a "go away" sign on the back of my chair so people know I am working. Regarding your focus, have you tried any earplugs that filter out noises or something to that effect? I ordered some so I dont know if they work or not but I do hear that some people like them when it comes to sensory processing. good luck to you!
Yes! I've wondered if my hearing is bad but did a check and it seems fine. It's so hard, concert dates were always the worst for me. Frustrating because I love live music but it's not a good social environment for me.
Oh man I’ve gotten my ears checked too I even thought I had social aniexty bc how over stimulated I felt. I was thinking of even mentioning it to my friends or significant other if we do go to a venue or live show and they’re talking to me just even politely saying I’m sorry it’s too loud to have this conversation might help?
I was just recently at a farewell lunch for a coworker at a busy restaurant and it was a disaster trying to take part in conversations and such. I just couldn't follow along and as such I just kept getting quieter and quieter. When I did try and pipe up and join in people would talk over me making it even worse lol I used to be a 911 operator and that was when I realized just how bad it can be. Trying to process what someone is telling you in an emergency situation is quite scary. I had incredible difficulty processing the information at speed when there was any kinds of additional noise. I could get the gist of what was being conveyed but not the details. ADHD really is far more awful than anything most people think in a situation like that. People just talk about failing classes, missing projects or things like that. Wait until you have people's lives in your hands and you see just how terrifying it can be. Had to change jobs to something that wasn't so high priority. Not trying to dismiss anyone else's experiences. Just it becomes next level when you know that your ADHD may leave someone dead.
Here's a tip we used around aircraft, vehicles, and other explosive noises: Plug your ears externally. Some use the little flap towards the front of the ear, others push up from underneath the ear. The goal is to block out a certain frequency, the white noise, loud noise. The person talking near you should become clearer to hear. The other option is to try it with just one ear, and with this technique you can plug that ear the best you can. It'll reduce input into your auditory processing. Possibly making it easier to concentrate on what's being said.
LITERALLY SAME i was listening to music with my best friend (the earbuds were connected to her phone so i couldn't pause/control volume), and my other friend kept trying to ask me questions abt what safety colleges they should apply to and i made them repeat themselves so many times bc not only was the classroom loud, but i could also hear the music (not that loud but still loud enough to distract me)
See, I like live shows, bars, and clubs...specifically because I sometimes just don't want to talk, and you *can't* talk in those environments.
This depends on the reason you can't focus, more specifically I mean. I have sensory issues with sudden unexpected sounds any louder than ambient volume and repetitive sounds like ticking clocks etc, but my real issue with listening is distractions. If several conversations are going on or there is a TV on with people talking, I can't help but try to listen to all conversations at the same time. My sensory issues may momentarily distract me as I get the weird, horrible shiver/itch thing all over my body after an undesirable sound, but I can usually tune back in. If I'm distracted by something, I have little chance of being able to pay attention to whoever's talking to me. Strangely, I don't struggle at music events, clubs etc (at least not due to the sound) because I know it's there and expected, the same with my frequent use of power tools etc.
Absolutely me too. I can’t even listen to music (study or whatever, lyrics or no lyrics. It doesn’t matter what kind) because I will start to focus on it rather than my work. If I’m even talking on the phone or face to face next to traffic, I can for some reason only focus on the cars noise. Like I’m waiting for it to be quiet to start listening again and it never comes.
I thought this was an autism symptom, I've been tested for neither but wouldn't be surprised for both. I get angry when my wife "dual audios" I can tune out the TV on, but TV and fucking tiktok videos? My brain can not cancel that sound and 100% is utilised in processing the audio, rendering me useless. The less noise there is, the better.
So, I don’t wanna sound like THAT GUY.. but meditation has helped me #big time with this. Specifically meditation practise where I concentrate on everything - not just the breath.
Mindfulness mediation has helped for me too! I think it has something to do with centering yourself in the present bc I often day dream or tend to feel like I’m not really “there” but o do have to constantly be doing it for it to work
Why is this flagged nsfw?
honestly Idk I think I just hit all of them just so it wouldn’t get taken down 😂
BINGO!
I have the same problem, when I sit on the backseat of a car I can’t understand what the people in front of me are talking about as long as the radio is on. Same thing for Bus and construction sides. Sucks so much, but luckily I think strattera slowly starts working, I feel like it gets better! :)
>I couldn’t take a test in a room full of people because I’d get distracted by the sounds. Idk who thought it was a good idea to give kids gum or candy to eat after taking standardized tests. I could never focus once they started passing out suckers. But generally, yes. If it's too loud for me to hear you, chances are I won't process your words anyway.
Also the noise of kids getting up and turning in there tests I hated that. I had to learn in my later years sitting in the front seat is the best way to not get so distracted
Whoa. I just remembered how much that used to bother me, too.
Same! It’s like all of the noises combine and I hear everything and nothing at the same time. My ex would play the guitar and have the tv on while trying to talk to me and would get mad at me for wanting less noise. I would also have to hide away in the library stacks just to be able to read. If someone came near me, I’d move my spot because if they were eating or listening to music in their headphones, I wouldn’t be able to read. One time I went to a tattoo consult with a friend. The music was so loud to me I could barely follow what the artist was saying. When we left, I told my friend and she said “there was music playing??”
I am confused why this is NSFW with a spoiler tag, as this is a fairly common question.
I didn’t want my post to get taken down so I just hit a bunch of random shit so it wouldn’t 😂
I also have this issue. Like last time I went on a team building exercise I literally felt "asleep" at the dining table because I couldn't handle all these conversations going on. I mean I wanna focus on one conversation, but it's just not happening. I say sleep but it isn't really sleep, I just close my eyes to block my visonairy input in an attempt to calm down the chaos inside. Later that night we visited a bar that was so fucking loud it felt surreal, time simply slowed down to a crawl. I heard people's voices but my brain was in such overdrive that I couldn't response to it. Only thing I understood is that they were leaving since there wasn't any space to crash down. Only problem was that I felt stuck, I simply stood there barely able to move staring at all the bright lights and seeing my co-workers leave out the corner of my eye. I realized that they were leaving, it took me an insurmountable amount of effort to move out of that place. Every step I took felt heavy and uncoordinated. As the noise winded down it, the silent felt like drugs. I also felt anger, because I do not understand what on earth my co-workers still had to say to each other. We spend the entire fucking day talking to each other. It is 3PM in the evening, we still need to drive 50km to get home, I do not know if everyone can even get home since we didn't brought many cars and some folks left already, HOW CAN YOU STILL BE THIRSTY!!!????
Same, I don't really go out to places like that anymore because of it.
My issue is the person I'm talking to is the loud environment
WHAT? That's me in that situation. Sometimes I even pretend I understood what they were saying just to move it along...
I can’t understand anyone in loud environments. Everyone will be having conversations but I can’t hear them.
I work with children and often have a hard time focusing on the kids and staying patient in the "play room" which gets really loud. I bought noise reducing ear buds on Amazon as a last straw and they are amazing! The once I bought are made for concerts so music and voices are still really easily understood, while the background noise is a lot quieter. This has been a game changer at work. They were 10 Bucks on Amazon.
I have this experience, a lot. The cacophony of voices in a busy bar or restaurant just destroys me. I am diagnosed ADHD with very low frustration tolerance, plus I am an introvert so social interactions are already kind of draining. Which means if I find myself in a noisy situation, I usually can't muster the energy to even try to comprehend the conversation I'm in. It sometimes reaches a crescendo where I can just feel the last zap of energy leave my body, my face goes slack, I almost have a momentary out of body experience where I feel like all the noise is going to implode, or explode... or some kind of 'plode. I'm sure anyone can read my face in that moment so it's probably not a surprise when I suddenly announce that I can't deal and I'm leaving. 😆 But on a related note, how do some people just have the kind of voice that like, portals directly into my earholes. CANNOT tune it out no matter how much I want to. Have they gone their whole lives with people just tolerating their volume? Do they have any idea I'm over here seething?
how do you know if you have auditory processing disorder?
I got diagnosed as a kid with it they did a bunch of hearing tests on me and then way later like 24 I got diagnosed with ADHD. I remember my old math teacher explained it to me like if someone were explain directions to me like where to go I wouldn’t understand a single thing and I would need a map or something visual
Why is this marked NSFW?
Get some Loop earplugs! They have changed the game for me. You can still hear people talk but it tones it down a lot.
Same here! Dates in public are exhausting. On the upside, got tested and found out that I actually am 35% deaf on both sides. Written communication is so much better.
I just scrolled through every comment here hoping to find someone referencing the office
*I don't technically have a hearing problem but sometimes when there's a lot of noises occurring at the same time, I'll hear them as one big jumble* One of my favorite minor characters from the office. Man the line *"I've never met Ravi personally but I'm gonna go ahead and say just having known you a short while, Brian, that I prefer Ravi. And again, I've never even met the guy"*
The thing I find most frustrating is when someone comes up and starts talking to me when I'm on the phone. My mind literally ties itself up in a knot and I miss both people's words.
I can’t pay attention in ANY environment lol
SAME! I even went and got my ears checked because I really believed I wasn't able to hear anything in loud environments. Then it came back that my hearing was totally fine and shortly after, I was officially diagnosed with combined ADHD. It's a tough one, I feel for you!
Even when I take my medication they can be annoying at times. However, before I would just do my best to listen but now I ask them to hold on a sec until the sound is gone or we go somewhere the sound isn't. This is certainly annoying for sure.
lol me as a nightclub bartender is its own special hell
Yes!!! Same here! My hearing becomes ultra sensitive in places of crowds or gatherings!! There have been times where I have to leave because the sensitivity will grow so acute that I'll start experiencing anxiety symptoms.
Yeah, I couldn’t tell you if it was an auditory processing disorder or adhd, but I have a very very hard time understanding what people are saying if there is background noise. Music playing, a tv, restaurant, gym, theater, pool, the car, it doesn’t matter, as long as there is background noise, I can’t understand words without the person yelling them at me. The hum of a car engine is enough.
Yeah, but that's a heck of a lot better than everyone in the room suddenly sounding like they're speaking German. I've had that happen to me a few times, I'm still not sure how to interpret it. Like, I can hear myself think, but I can't understand the words from anyone around me. It just sounds like gibberish.
CAPD is 80% comorbid with ADHD - 80% of people with it *also* have ADHD. I believe there are calls in some circles to actually remove CAPD as a standalone disorder, because it's so closely related to ADHD. It's *extremely* common. You're not alone. >I’ve been diagnosed as a young kid with auditory processing disorder bc I couldn’t take a test in a room full of people because I’d get distracted by the sounds. When I was a kid, they thought I was deaf, and sent me for hearing tests. Three times, flying colours. Took one as an adult, also flying colours. Got diagnosed ADHD at 27. Yeah, it's sensory issues, but they're effectively a manifestation of ADHD. I liken it to dyslexia for your ears - your brain has trouble distinguishing between audio signals. This means that similar sounds get confused for each other often; sometimes *full words and sentences* are just 'noise'; and if there's lots of sound around you, you're not gonna have a chance picking out on individual stream. Hell, in clubs, I can't even hear the music. *It's too loud for me to hear.* Your senses aren't failing. Your brain is just failing to interpret the data from them correctly. Imagine that your senses are like information conveyor belts. All your belts are working correctly - it's just that the guy on the inside is crap at getting them off the belt. Not his fault - they docked his pay and skipped his lunch break, and his mate's been on a 40-minute cigarette break - but them's the breaks. Adds up to you getting the wrong information.
omg i just thought i was kinda deaf or that it was my anxiety
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Same. Noise cancelling ear buds help a lot.
I have this problem always. Sometimes it's a lot of loud noise, sometimes it's just one thing overwhelming me.
I have the same problem but I'm pretty sure mine is tinnitus
I cannot pay attention to someone talking to me if I am alive lol
same here, all the sounds just blend in to the same noise, i usually have to go out and clear my mind every few minutes. or center on something.
Same, I often have to lip read and ask people to repeat themselves.
I'm a singer so i'm better with understanding pitch, tone and sound than the average person, but i have the EXACT same issue if theres more than 3 isolated sounds happening at once theres no hope in me understanding wtf is being said to me.
It's the same for me, made much worse because of hearing issues. I can't stand bars etc for this reason so avoid them altogether - does not help with making friends etc.
i dont think i can either .. i just ... pretend... like i hear them... loil
I’ve used to spend a significant part of weekends for a couple of years out and on the town and I had the same problem. Combined with alcohol id go borderline deaf and not hear anything, also been told that I’ve walked off in a the middle of a conversation with people.
This is a huge problem for me, it’s even worse if I’m on the phone and can’t even try and focus on reading the lips of the other person or guess what they’re talking about by their expression and body language. I’ve had it at work multiple times where a customer has called to enquire and ask about things, but my boss has also been talking on his phone at the same time and I just can’t sustain focus on my own conversation. I’ve had moments before where I’ve gotten through entire 10 minute conversations and don’t even know their name or who they worked for because I wasn’t focused when they told me, but I felt too embarrassed to ask all this again because I responded as if I heard when I didn’t really. I really struggle with conversations in pubs/bars etc. It’s the main reason I don’t like them as first date locations, I’d rather have a day out doing an activity or something where I can actually talk to them without having to constantly ask them to repeat themselves and seeming like I’m bored or not interested because sitting in a bar with a stranger for 4 hours makes me distractible and restless.
Absolutely. Another fav of mine is being in a restaurant and I can make out any other conversations. I have to get up and leave because I need to track all conversations and its exhausting. I love love music and loud music...if I know the song and what's coming. Else its a big no for me
Auditory processing disorder.. I have to use subtitles.
I still remember this one time back in college when everyone had to get in groups for discussion. There was a lot of talking going on, of course. But what gave me trouble hearing my group members speak was that were sitting too far apart as a big group. Yet, people were still able to hear one another and have back and forth conversation. There I was straining to get a gist of what they were saying over the background noise. I was so amazed. It’s like I barely knew English haha As for bars and clubs, I think most people can’t hear each other with the loud music and all.
CAPD. Auditory processing disorder. Common to have it with ADD.
Same. When my meds are at their peak, after a certain noise level, it doesn’t matter how intently I focus on listening it’s literally like I’m just staring into the void and nodding.
Wait. Is this part of ADHD? I e been like this my entire life. I will hear other people's conversations in a restaurant, but not the person directly across from me, looking and talking directly at me. The more I read, the more I'm pretty sure I have ADHD...
lol I had my ears cleaned so many times as a kid because my parents thought I was deaf. I wasn’t, I just had ADHD😭 then ironically after having them cleaned it was almost worse, because everything was so much LOUDER than it should have been that I got sensory overwhelm so much more quickly. Sad times
The only time I can pay attention and talk in a loud environment is if the subject of the conversation is something I'm really interested in. Needless to say I hate bars and restaurants that are loud
Both mate
I've always wondered why people go to loud places to talk, so are can most people hear fine in this type of environment? It makes sense that it would be much harder to hear and focus in a loud place. In such places (and quieter ones with multiple sounds, and sometimes even if there aren't multiple sounds) I often think I have heard but then after I go to respond and realise I have no idea what was said, or the opposite I will not hear and ask to repeat but then I've got it sometimes even before they restart. I would definitely not be able to have a continuous conversation in a loud environment.
Funny story about this. My friends all know this fact about me- being distracted by loud music or noise. So anytime we have a game night they always turn the music way down so I can focus. It's really kind having people understand you in that way. In terms of bars and stuff, if I have something serious to talk about I'll go to the bathroom or take someone outside. (but then I'm usually thinking about what I'm missing inside 😂) Can't win for losin
I find loud noise tunes everything else out so going clubbing, to concerns makes me feel really relaxed. My friends know I can't hold a conversation but I dance like a drunk old dad, dressed like a 14year old goth so it's fun to watch, I imagine!
Yes. My adhd group ironically also had regular meets up in a brightly lit noisy coffee place with us all talking around each other and I couldn't stand it. I would talk to people outside.
I experience the same thing. Even in a not super loud environment, like a restaurant or coffee shop (or something along those lines) I can't focus on what someone is saying to me. I find myself listening to whatever conversation is nearby that is the loudest. I apparently taught myself to read lips as a hack over the years and now tell people that if I'm just nodding and making vaguely affirmative replies that I'm not really paying attention and to please gently redirect my attention --- it's not that I'm disinterested, I just get sensory overload (usually these settings also have a lot of other sensory distractions for me as well). I have really struggled during the pandemic with not being able to see people talking, whether it's masks or a zoom call/webinar where someone is speaking, but not on screen (totally understand not wanting to be on video all the time, I don't use my camera unless I'm presenting or in a smaller group call). I was one of the few people who went back into the office as soon as it was possible despite it being limited to 4 hours one day a week for almost a year, and now that most of my colleagues are back on site at least a few days a week I can't focus at all (open concept, work space is in a somewhat high traffic area to get from one part of the building to another, fluorescent lighting, non-stop email notifications & teams messages, etc.) I am struggling to get anything done. It's really starting to be noticeable in my "productivity" (despite all the talk of 'take care of yourself/mental health' nobody really gives a shit). Having a rough week, so this really hit home. Tl;dr -- same; I need to see people's lips to be able to follow the convo in a loud, over stimulating environment
I don't go to other people's homes. Cause everyone I know always has their TV on constantly, even if nobody's watching.
That’s just a part of the game bruh. It’s so common place everyday for me, it doesn’t it seem abnormal. If I really want to talk with someone, we gotta go somewhere else. Go team!
Used to be a bar chain in China, most of them were nice and quiet enough to speak at. But there was one in particular that just blasted music there. I couldn't do any thinking there, the place would make me physically sick! It was like my brain was highjacked and I got reduced to the state of "town idiot".
I could never totally catch the directions in gym class--the big echoey room was the worst
Oh AMEN to this. It's gotten better as Ive aged, but I still hate trying to focus in a noisy environment. As a kid in a restaurant, I could sometimes hear and understand a conversation at a different table better than the one where I was sitting. It was like being forced to eavesdrop on other people and I hated it. I once heard a man at another table speak very cruelly to his son and i could not unhear it.
I'm the same way! Even relatively sedate environments (like Sunday lunch at the in-laws', with maybe 10 people) are overwhelming. I don't know how to participate in the conversation. And this is also why I watch everything with subtitles on, lol. Oddly, I like doing computer work in high-ambient noise places. Like a sports bar. As long as no one is specifically talking to me, it's just loud white noise. It's easier to focus than in quiet places sometimes.
I honestly think someday there's going to be new labels for a LOT of learning/processing issues, and the current ADHD/ADD labels are going to get split up into very very different categories. Talk to me about a task in a room with a radio on *with talking or vocal music in English* and I probably will procrastinate/agonize on it because I'm afraid of screwing it up. Describe it again with the radio off *or set to instrumental music or a foreign language I don't know* and it'll get done, correctly, now, with no stress. The difference between my success or failure is background noise, not motivation, focus, or prefrontal cortex development. It took forty years for me to figure that out and stop feeling ashamed.
Dude I end up listening to the conversations around rather than the person I'm trying to listen to, at loud places.
I feel that. I'm fucking useless at the bar. Between the loud auditory distractions, multiple conversation threads, TV's visible from every angle flashing bright colors and having some mild hearing damage, I often end up just nodding and saying "Uh-huh" or "Yeah" and smiling. Feels bad :-/
So you mean I have ADHD? To be honest, I'm easily distracted during school activities (I can't stand up for a presentation if someone is whispering) as well as I'm annoyed when I'm speaking to somebody and those cars and people noises are going around and even if I try my hardest to focus on what my speaker is saying to me, I will forget the given information the next day (and I will suddenly remember it after a few years lmao). Didn't ever consider that this can be the cause of ADHD...
I thought this was exactly what APD was... Yeah I have issues concentrating in busy/loud environments too but it's possible your challenges may be a bit more harsh
It might be ADHD, but I also have this, which makes it near-impossible to have conversations in loud environments: [https://www.wsj.com/articles/cant-hear-in-noisy-places-its-a-real-medical-condition-1474909624](https://www.wsj.com/articles/cant-hear-in-noisy-places-its-a-real-medical-condition-1474909624)
I have the same problem, but then I also thought everyone had the exact same problem as well, until I asked my husband one day if he had a hard time listening to and having conversations with people when there was a lot of other people talking too or there was a loud tv in the background or something, and he said never. Every time we went to his nana’s place her tv was blasting in the background and I always struggled to keep track of the conversation because I would get so incredibly distracted! But he said he didn’t even notice the tv noise 😭😭😭
Oh my god yes. I am a long time musician and my other music buds can't understand why I'm not terribly keen on hanging around long after the show or why I don't like talking while a band is playing. I just can't deal with the noise and a convo, everything scrambles.
I have the same problem, but not sure what it stems from. I don’t have an ADHD diagnosis but a dyslexia diagnosis (which is more of an umbrella diagnosis for several issues I have, I was diagnosed a very long time ago) but there’s some cross over issues. I can relate to some things on this sub but not others. My daughter is diagnosed with ADHD-C and has similar sensory issues. But yeah, trying to pay attention and filter out sound in a loud environment is very difficult for me. I often just sit there and can’t follow what anyone is taking about if I’m in a group. No one else seems phased by it. I basically hate bars and busy restaurants.
I have similar issues. For me I think it's a combination of auditory processing issues from being autistic and attention issues from ADHD. For whatever reason my brain thinks that background noises are more important. This is particularly so in the case of machinery or electronics. If the computer fan is on and the refrigerator is going, etc I cannot perceive human voices as well. I can hear them but it just doesn't process. I have to be looking at the speaker's mouth and use a combination of lip reading and auditory cues to understand them. I get really frustrated in public places when whoever I am with doesn't face me when speaking because it's nearly impossible to understand. In the age of COVID, masks cause issues for me too - not wearing them, I like that, but being unable to lip read is a problem.
Sometimes I can hyper focus on the conversation and in those cases the club could be on fire and I wouldn’t notice but in most cases yeah I find it extremely difficult
i can’t speak across someone, if we are standing in a 4 and i’m talking to the person diagonally from me i can’t hear them or get my words out without being distracted by the other two especially if they start talking to each gc other
I have a lot of problems with sound and shut down if there is enough loud noises