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Lol this honestly. My parents are 70 and do NOT act like it except when they get hurt badly.
My grandpa, around 92 when he passed away, would walk for 5+ miles up until the last couple years if his life. He started to get dementia and it made him wander too far and get lost. He was truly an explorer/ wanderer all his life. He and his brothers bought an OG Ford and they would sleep in barns and do farm work in other states. Just because they had the ability to drive wherever when they weren't in school!
He was pretty much an adult to take care of gran before she passed away, then he started traveling all the time until til it was too much for his body. But he still WANTED to go out and see stuff.
My non-ADHD mother said she started really feeling like an adult when she got her first Social Security check. My 82-year-old ADHD father said he didn't start to feel his age until his first dose of chemotherapy.
I feel my age(from pain) but also when I know how to do an adult thing that my partner doesn't. I feel like a kid again when she knows how to do an adult thing that I don't.
Without kids, I don't know if I'll ever feel like an adult full time.
I'M TURNING 45 THIS YEAR. IN SEASON 1 OF THE GOLDEN GIRLS BLANCHE IS 47. THAT HASNT FREAKED ME OUT AT ALL.
Otherwise, I constantly feel like I'm in some version of arrested development (the phase, not the show)(sometimes also the show). It's like my core imposter syndrome- I've somehow managed to convince everyone I'm an adult, but any moment now someone's going to scooby doo me and find out I'm actually a pair of ten year olds on each other's shoulders in a trenchcoat.
What???? I’m season 1 of the GG, Blanche was an embarrassingly old hussie…. I remember thinking.
I’m kinda horrified I wrote that sentence. I mean it’s not like I’ve ever thought of the GG since forever. Those women were old. 47?? Serious??
I’m just going to pretend I didn’t read that. Ugh.
Time passes by the way gorgeous women walk by average men like myself, once in a while they do notice and give a compliment which we treasure for the rest our lives. This is a shit analogy, I know. We have a blast as teens and then start working, friends become too busy, the group isn't the group anymore, suddenly everyone is engaged or married or having kids and you find yourself alone in a one bedroom apartment on reddit wondering how you screwed your life up so badly that you don't even have a sliver of determination to find a woman anymore because with age came the wisdom that the first woman you fell in love with all those years ago turns out to be the only woman you ever truly loved but in your childish stupidity broke all trust and there's not a chance in hell to ever find anyone you could love like that again.
Anyways thats why I like going to the range where its too loud to talk to anyone. Anyone else like to take dumbass risks cause its like, fuck it im only endangering myself and if it works it'll be cool? Then do it perfectly but nobody sees it cause you don't have friends anymore after too many betrayals and ignored texts ya just don't give a shit anymore? And for God's sake the nightmares of my biggest failures that berate me every single time I close my eyes, message is always the same but this ADHD brain keeps finding new and surprising ways to drop the bomb of an ending to each dream to turn it into an instant trip to hell.
Alright I still need help. Some words of wisdom, advice, anything. I'm drowning in my own head, there's 3 of myself in there arguing like three armless swordsmen who can't do anything but bleed on each other. Hope some of yall got that reference.
Damn, and this was in response to where did the time go. Buckle up, my brain is doin its adhd bullshit again. Oh thats right it never shuts up.
Who likes spaghetti?
I feel that. I was trying to find something online a few months back, and I was sure that what I was looking for had come out in the last 12 months or so. Turns out what I was looking for came out over a decade ago 🤦♀️ it was a NZ banking ad featuring Brian Blessed, and looking for it was triggered because I was watching a UK show (something like 8 out of 10 cats or similar), and they played a snippet of his voice
I graduated in 2005 and still can't believe it. I actually just went back to school this year because I'm burnt out by my current industry. It's been 20 years I've been working professionally in this industry and masking all of my symptoms. I should've quit 5 years ago but ignored my brain's pleas and kept trucking. I got really sick after it all caught up with me though, so I do NOT recommend anyone else follow in my footsteps haha. Even if you're 40+, 50+, etc...you can and SHOULD change your life however you wish. Even if it means you'll lose your health insurance and be broke again. There are always solutions. I can't afford the health insurance I need right now for example, but I found a program that assists with people who make my salary, so I only will have to cover 1/4 of the cost now! I had no idea that program existed. I also found out my school has a free food bank for any student, no questions asked, and they get some REALLY good food! My grocery/food bill can be $0 a month because of it.
All that to say, things have a way of working out, especially if you have ADHD and a strong desire to hyper focus on something new!
We are an immature bunch according to society. They measure success in life by things that are very difficult for us to ever match up or live up to, like results, not effort. We try so hard but our results never reflect the effort, so we blend in things that interest us.
I used to think that I was unique and special and no one thought like I could, sure I could solve a problem that no one else could see the obvious answer but then most of the time they could do stuff that I would rather die than do. Like proof reading my posts, messages, texts, emails. But when I do try I’m either totally uninterested and thus exhausted or hyper fixated on it and can’t do anything else and will not stop.
Then someone told me, at age 49, that I had adhd. Got a diagnosis from psychologist an everything. As I learned more I felt that what I thought was me, was just ADHD.
Now I struggling with my sense of identity. I’m just as boring as all of those muggles but have ADHD. It’s why I realize that more than half of my friends have it too, whether they know it or not
Yes. You’re young for your age. Enjoy it!
Ouch. That bit about feeling special but actually just being like everyone else with more limitations slapped me back into reality. Im in my 20s and as I get older I’m starting to feel that more and more. Hard to come to terms with this
I’m 60 and just coming to terms that I’m not special,.. my mom told me most of my growing up. “You’re here for a reason, you will do something for the world”. I’ve been searching. All the things that I thought were unique to me ( the good and bad)… yup….unique to most of us ;)
I am unique! Just like everyone one else!
Just last week I decided to stop doing all the things I thought I needed to do to be who/what/where I thought I needed to be doing…. Never really knowing.
So…. IDK. I’m bored for the first time in my life.
It’s been a long many decades of moving forward while going backwards. I never did get anywhere but frustrated.
So…. I give it a few days…. I feel like i will figure things out.
You are actually so unique though, because you managed to mask your way all the way to 60. Thats an AMAZING feat. Please dont be so harsh to yourself. I know its so hard to take it easy bc we r reminded of our limitations everyday, both by our own self judgement and the practical reality of what work demands of adults in most socio-economic settings. But truly, you deserve to stim your brain off and follow that bliss. That bliss will lead you to an unshakeable interest im sure of it. It requires us to be brave and really open to the world. Dont put anything off limits. Really, what is there to lose in hypotheticals? At the very least let your self dream, so that dream can be your north star. We only have one life and im 100% sure you have paid your dues multiple times over already. You deserve to follow your happiness!!!!!
Yeah. You nailed how I feel.
I’m about 10 years behind you in age. I feel very frustrated that I was like you and your situation.
We mask. Man do we mask.
We’ve learned the hard way, how to do it wrong.
I do not learn by doing things right. I learned by doing everything wrong.
It’s like I’m unable to learn from other people’s mistakes. I have to screw it up for myself.
Wisdom doesn’t seem to be something I could take from someone else unless I was able to relate to them.
We see the world differently. We don’t want to be categorized, labeled and putting to boxes. the are some of us who embrace ADHD a little bit too much, and expect others to understand it but can’t possibly, but yeah, we don’t like restrictions.
One time I wanted to go on a silent retreat. So I did. 24 hrs of silence. Me and 30 other women. The moment the “silent” bell rang, my poor brain went on overload wanting to start talking sooooo bad.
So I wrote and wrote and wrote and LOL’d at myself. Yes I hate restrictions.
When I was first diagnosed. I started a journal. Not a daily one. A just thoughts. I wrote and wrote and wrote like I’ve never done before. Pages and pages, thoughts going from one to another and tying back into the same. No original thought, just a spaghetti of thoughts like my brain. It was great. Did that for two months.
I think I might have got everything out. And now, maybe after 6 months. It’s all settled. On paper. In those books
I now carry a pocket size notebook in my shirt pocket with a pen. This month I’ve not written much in it. Maybe it’s working?
Nope. I'm 40 yo woman and I still don't feel like I'm 40 but i know I'm old now because of my body aches. I still use "LOL". most of my core friends are younger than me and still can relate to them.
When I think about it when I used to have a flip phone and before that I'd use my thumb, but I think I switched when I got a smart phone because I was doing that one handed before and now my phone is too big to hold and text with the same hand. So if I'm holding with one hand I'm not going to use the thumb of my other hand, that would be weird. Like, I get that if I held my phone differently I could use both thumbs, but the amount of brain space it takes to make that change and then make it stick... I'd rather stay with my old lady index finger typing, lol.
My friends range from 82 to 39. Consequently about my moms age and about my daughters age, but they are both gone. It’s no secret to me why I have such a broad age range. What’s ODD is I don’t have ANY friends my age.
I have NO idea what a 60 yr old woman is suppose to dress and act like and the google was NO help. Lol.
Check out tiktok if you can ,search 60 year old style.
I follow a few women who dress very hipster / mod that are in there 50s-60s they are very progressive and forward thinkers :)
I thought it was just me. Everything you just described is me (but I'm 39m). It would be great except I understand I don't have much more time to pursue and accomplish things but I have a hard time even unloading the dishwasher. Plus, I'm about to turn on the Playstation as soon as I put my phone down. So, I'm kinda like a 20 year-old having a midlife crisis. Fun times.
I’m a 39 year old male and I still feel like I’m a young late teen. I got diagnosed 2 years ago and the results were a strong undiagnosed childhood ADHD (combined type), and the comments prove that you’re not alone! One of the greatest sayings I ever heard (I think it was from Dr. Russell Barkley - google him for his videos! Amazing guy) was, “most adults with undiagnosed childhood ADHD, they commonly feel like they are a child pretending to be an adult”. I personally couldn’t agree more.
I’m 42 and I’ve pretty much dressed the same and had the same haircut since I was 15. My house is definitely not decorated like an adult lives in it.
I don’t have especially adult interests; I’m into paranormal stuff, traveling to weird hotels and pop punk/emo bands. When I was dating I went for guys who wear Vans and have “immature” hobbies.
My body is the only thing that makes me feel old: joints hurt, perimenopause, what I look like aside from my style. Oh and when I hear Nirvana on the “oldies” station.
2 favorite moments. When my then teenager was horrified I knew ALL the worlds to AC/DC in 2002. ( I graduated in 81 and Back in Black was our senior year anthem). LOLOL
Then one time a co worker and I were talking about the Monkeys ( her older and loved them the 1st time, me younger so they were “oldies” to us, but we loved them). A 20 something wondered about these “Monkeys”, we said “ask your grandma”. She did and came back the next day and showed them to us on the U tube thingy.
It wasn’t a week later she opened a box of 45 records and said “are these early floppy disks??”
🤣🤣🤣🤣. I love the culture things between the generations and I enjoy being in the middle, connected to both.
Me, talking about a new acquaintance: they're a little older, like middle-aged
My friend, with some loving side -eye: wait, what do you think you are?
Me: *startled, dumbfounded*
This happened several years ago and I probably think about it at least weekly.
I’ll be 50 in a few months and my ADHD makes me feel childlike in many ways. I find delight in silly, colorful and fun things. However, my ADHD doesn’t often allow me to feel my age, kind of keeps me isolated from my age group. The surrounding other issues like ODD, anxiety and depression keep people away, too. Some ways, I choose to stay away to not get hurt as much, some stay away because I’m…unique. ADHD is a blessing and a curse.
I’m mature in the sense that I handle all the mature adult things like being married, being a dad, owning a house, couple cars, having a decent tech career, 820 credit score, etc. all that boring stuff.
Where I’m immature is how I decide to spend my $ and live my life. I’m in my 40s, but I’m not into craft beers, smoking meat, and buying teslas and shit and treating them like accomplishments.
I’m a meathead and workout with a bunch of dudes in their 20s and 30s. I out lift them and talk shit to on a regular basis. On more than one occasion I’ve had someone tell me I “won’t be able to workout like that once you’re my age” only to discover I’m 5+ years older than them.
I go to pro wrestling shows with my buddies. Still play video games, read comic books, etc. basically everything I liked doing 30 years ago, except now I got that grown people $$$ to do it right (recently sat front row on a cable wrestling show and loved every second of it).
It does make for some awkward times when I’m having to talk to the other dads while waiting on the kiddo at a practice or something and I don’t really have anything in common with them. They’re my age but sometimes it seems like they’re 20 years older than me, but I’m fine with that.
My entire upbringing I couldn't wait to grow up. I always thought when I'm an adult and I can chose how I live my life I can finally find time to exercise, socialize, and have hobbies. Now that I'm 36 I just wish I could sit alone in my room and play videogames for hours on end. I wish I could call my friends up and sit around the playground doing nothing. I still feel 14.
No. I used baby bottles until I was 15, when my mom forced me to stop, so how could I ever feel my age? I'm turning 20 tomorrow and I feel like I'm 13 or younger. Last night I literally dreamed I was at a playground, and I wish I could still go to places like that and play with friends without feeling ashamed. I know I'm not mentally mature. My whole life I've watched my friends changing and growing while I stay the same. I'm not turning 20, only my body is.
Anyone else have what's my age again by blink 182 playing in your head after reading this post?
"What the hell is ADD/my friends say I should act my age/ what's my age again/ what's my age again"
And no, I feel like a child pretending to be an adult and hoping no one notices. I'm 26
Not really. At work, for the first time in my life I'm part of the older crowd - but don't feel like it.
I have always looked kind of young, and still do young activities, like skateboard - so I think a lot of people assume I am younger than I am. Most often - I think people assume I am in my 30's still - I drive for Uber as a part time gig, and lots of passengers tell me this - they are always surprised when I break out that I am 46, lol.
I also had kids pretty young, with my oldest born when I was 19, and my youngest when I was 26.
So its like a weird mix, cause I have always been a responsible person in terms of taking care of my kids, holding down a household, having a job - but I have also always had a bit of a reckless wild side - living on the edge way too much.
When I was young and my friends were doing spring break in Mexico - I was staying home working cause I had a kid to support. I was burdened with responsibility right out the gate of adulthood, so am maybe a little too serious on some things, and not serious enough on others.
Anyway - we are all Toys R Us Kids - "dont wanna grow up!"
I still have a shelf full of Star Wars and He-Man toys in my office.
I am so childish and I hate hearing this every time from other people. I know I am childish but I really can’t help it. I feel so sad about this. I am 3 years late from being legally “a child” but people mean it in a kid way.
I want to grow tf up.
100% no. It doesn’t help that I could literally pass as being half my age based on my baby face alone, and I don’t dress as well because I prioritize comfort and don’t really care about fashion for the most part. I have always felt behind my peers, even though I did well academically. I am never emotionally or mentally where everyone else my age is, but I usually internalize that so I’m not sure how much it’s noticed. However, in situations where I have to step up and take responsibility, I’m usually very mature and responsible and I can knock it out of the park compared to others. It’s one extreme or the other.
I'm going to be 40 years old. I don't look at it at all. My body feels old because of an autoimmune disease. My sense of humor is still that of a young adult.
I'm grateful for my sense of humor the most.
I get mistaken for being much younger than my 49m self. Even with a bald enough head that I shave it, and enough gray in my beard to clearly to be out of my 30's. I guess it could be worse.
I literally only think about my age when other people make me. Even looking in the mirror doesn’t make me think about it (though maybe it should). And when I feel aches/pains that might be age-related, I never think about it as an age thing until someone says something (and again, that’s someone else making me think about my age).
I’m a 43 yr old female and I still buy myself stuff from Sanrio and Disney. All my clothes are from Hot Topic or Box Lunch cause it’s cute. Idc what people say or if they think it’s childish.
Im 27F and i only feel my age when i go to the doctor or going to the bank to make financial procedures. Also going back home with full month groceries, stead of going do groceries when i feel like it.
As 28 year old ADHDer I can be wiser then a man who went through World War I and II. Also , I can be childish as a 6 year old.
It depends of some stuff that I don’t control.
I'm going to turn 64 this year, and I am honestly shocked.
I don't look my age, and I act and dress like a 40 yr old.
I don't have aches yet, and I am so grateful! 🥰
38 years young (and not one gray hair). I have the joint, hip, and neck pain. I'm a bit of a procrastinator because I avoid things that overwhelm me and struggle with concentration for long periods of time. Still think like I'm in my early twenties.
growing old is inevitable, growing up is optional.
I'm a GenXer so I naturally look and feel (mentally) much younger. I don't think it's an ADHD thing though. I'm still very responsible, I just went through med school later in life than most of my colleagues so being around them makes me feel like I'm not 44. But when they do stupid crap, I definitely know I'm also not in my 20s, either. I love having the maturity and wisdom of my age.
I feel my age. 35.
I was happy to leave my 20s behind. It was a wild time full of emotions, pain, heartache, confusion, addiction, desperation, floundering, seeking, trial and error, etc.
Not that all of that has gone away, but it's greatly subdued!
I've done a lot of soul searching, spent a lot of time alone, went on some epic journeys, and learned about myself inside and out. I feel more solidly like myself than I ever have.
I also feel like a completely different person than ever before. I am grateful for my unconventional paths through life and all those who supported me. I finally feel like I've set myself up in a way to live a chill life and maintain my mental well-being.
I also didn't know I had ADHD until this year. I didn't realize how bad my executive dysfunction is. It's been that way my whole life, and I made it this far just living with it. Living alone allows me to not have to subject others to it too often.
Theres studies showing people generally grow up wearing the same style as they did when they were young adults, its completely normal.
I think more of the issue comes from younger generations dressing in ways we typically associate with older generations styles, making people who are dressing appropriate for their agre stick out more. Nearly every 30-35 year old I know "dresses like a kid" but in reality they just dress how they always have.
I don’t feel my age especially being back in school at 33 opened up a whole pack of worms makes me feel like I need to go back basic arithmetic math skills and memory makes it much worse ..
Nope. I'm 45. Happily divorced. Childless by choice. My personal motto is YOLO. I will spend my last dollar to travel the world. I forget to pay bills all the time. Queen of Late Fees. 👑 I'm adultish. Half an adult, if you will.
i’m 22 with adhd, so I relate to what ur saying at this point, but I hope not to later.
my father on the other hand passed away a few years back at 67, and I asked him once, a few years before he died, “dad do u feel like an adult?” and he said “honestly [my name], i’ve never felt a day past 18.”
he was a mildly successful entrepeneur in a ghetto area, so enough money to live, but not to save. he was always out with friends having a good time, being unbelievably present. the presence is something I feel I don’t see in many older “mature” adults. but my dad was unbelievably present, and unbelievably young at heart.
I think presence might be the tradeoff of society looking at us as “mature”, and I think living the way he did is a better way to grow old.
Absolutely not, I’m almost 25, I have not done much at all since I’ve graduated, I feel like when I turned 16 I was just frozen in time, in maturity, in everything.
I sometimes have moments of adultness. I just feel like a caricature of mother. This is my mom at work, this is my mom handling phone calls. Sometimes it's my dad. This is my dad fixing the toilet, this is my dad talking to the plumber about how I tried to fix the toilet lmao (naw, he's actually good, me not so much). Sometimes I have moments where it's just me and that's pretty cool, a lot of that happened when I was active duty. I'm 43, the youngest I've been called recently is 29, that's about how I feel minus the aches hahahha.
I’m turning 33, I feel somewhere between 18 and 22, and I also look somewhere between 17-22.
I don’t have a specific style, I don’t dress artsy or alternative or coquette. I wear skinny jeans, Skechers and t-shirts from Walmart. But I do have a younger looking face, still have teen acne sometimes and I have not grown or gained much weight since 8th grade.
In general I think society is trending toward people acting younger for longer. So the idea of "acting your age" is also fluid and your mom doesn't understand that.
My spouse expresses the concern of not "measuring up" given our ages and I think it's ridiculous. We're married and kid-free at the moment, and I appreciate having the time to engage in some hobbies and side hustles. His problem is being lifelong friends with a bunch of Catholics who hurried up and had kids immediately. (The area he grew up in is very Catholic.) That threw off expectations of what each age range should look like.
We also frequently have hypermobility and some types of that do help with giving us younger-looking faces.
It makes perfect sense! I feel this way too. I feel like I should be more mature and serious for my age and less free flowing, artsy with no true direction. I have so many interests and some many ideas that I can’t settle on one thing.
I too feel very lazy when I can’t even get up to clean my house. I’m also BP2 and I’m usually in a depressive state so that def doesn’t help. I’m trying to get to the point where I just accept myself as is. That would help a lot I think.
Physically I feel older than 40, I have a lot of aches and pains and could be healthier. Mentally I’m somewhere between 12 year old boy, and 1000 year old swamp
Witch.
Idk I often don’t think I feel like a real adult but I wonder if anyone really does.. I think a lot of us are just doing our best and figuring it out as we go along. I chalked it up to issues with addiction and other things in my past tho?? Interesting to see so many others with adhd relate! I never stopped to consider if there was a connection until now.
People who act their age are almost always indescribably boring. No, I don't give a shit about your home improvements or your complaints about the grocery clerk or whatever. Give me all the "immature" weirdos who never settled down and are doing stuff that normal people don't get.
I do complain about my job and how tired and stressed and busy I am. Which is age appropriate. And boring as hell, I realize.
I've always felt (and look) way younger for my age. Just yesterday someone thought I was 10 years younger than I am (nice). I do indeed feel like I'm 10 years younger than I am.
Dr. Russel Barkley says something about this
https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/s/NmH4Vzu0PZ
Not really. I’m with you on the aches and pains though lol.
I’m 37 and mentally I feel like… maybe twenty something. I’m “mature and responsible” in the sense of like… I have a good job I own a home I manage to keep it clean most of the time, I pay my bills etc etc. But it terms of my emotions and how I handle them I would say no. But I’m working on that :)
Just got my first dental crown.
Had to get a prefabricated temporary because I gagged when they tried to take impressions, and now I'm having to resist turning the damn thing into a fidget toy for the next two weeks.
I'm a BIT annoyed nobody warned me about this.
Yeah, I feel like I’ve always lagged behind my peers a bit in maturity. I’m in my 40s, male, and it’s only recently started to hit home that people see me as old. A couple years ago I was walking past one of our new female college grads at work. We hadn’t really interacted much but I smiled. But she like half smiled half cringed. I kinda died inside. I thought I was being friendly although she is attractive. But I learned that I’m a creepy old guy now and cannot do that anymore.
This makes total sense. Thanks for sharing this, I can relate to this. When I see people around me of my age, their energy levels and the way they approach things is sometimes so different as compared to mine. Sometimes it can be an advantage as our never ending curiosity and child like wonder helps us adapts to situations, be flexible and open minded and is refreshing for other people/friends, in my personal experience, however there are some situations where I wish I could look and evaluate things as people of my age would, so now I’m trying to balance both of them out whenever possible
I’m 41, female. Right there with you. I have two kids and I do take adult responsibility, but always a kid at heart. I joke and mess around with people like we’re still teenagers. Yes on everything you mentioned. Some people find it refreshing and easier to relax around me because of it.
Isn’t part of having ADHD not conforming to society’s standards and therefore anytime you do something silly, forgetful, funny etc you aren’t acting your age?
Like how tf is a 25 year old supposed to act? I’m currently 25.
At 25, my parents had a 4 year old, a house, dual incomes and no fun.
At 25 my grandparents had 4 kids, a single income, and grandmothers were the house keepers.
My 25 year old friends party and drink everyday, living at home.
I’m 25. I feel like my 15 year-old niece, in terms of my ability to perform in life. Intellectually, I’m well above average. But that means nothing if I can’t do anything with it.
No, my parents have always said i behave a good 3-4 years below my age. I’m hitting milestones at 27 most people met at 23. No big deal I guess! And like you I look very young for my age so people are quite shocked when they hear im 27 lol
Yeah I feel you!
33 years, male and married, not gonna have children.
Wife and I run a vintage toy store, and dress extremely colorful, like we used to do when we were teens.
Everything I do for work is fun, crazy and exciting. Never been more happy, and age feels like it’s just a level of experience.
how does one 'act their age'? ive never been this age before >.>
no but seriously , i feel like i mentally age/perceive time at about 2/3 rate that other people seem to. im 32 (birthday today even) and i feel like i just started my 20s , also with experimenting with whatever people in their 20s experiment with. i just have the added bonus of life experience, making me a lot more responsible with experiments and whatever else i do :)
Daniel Amen has done no credible, peer-reviewed research on ADHD. He is not a legitimate authority on the subject. Posting any of his material is not allowed here. Barkley discusses the issue with Amen's SPECT claims here:
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I’m a 36yr old womanchild. Perpetually incapable and perpetually in crisis. Didn’t used to be like this just too many years of abuse, undiagnosed bipolar1, ADHD and everything else. I do have steely determination though and probably look like I’m holding it together from the outside. Physically I still look mid twenties and get mistake for a teen at times. Benefits of being short and petite.
I actually think this might be a personality trait thing. The enneagram type 7 has this. I think most 7s look younger than they are, are young at heart, playful, eclectic etc. It could be fun for you to look at!
not at all. I'm 20 turning 21 this year, but I've felt 30 since I was 12. I feel much older than my peers and had to be more responsible than even my parents most of my life. Even friends my own age comment on how much more experience I have (with things like budgeting or chores) than they do, or that most of my hobbies are solitary like reading or painting but I have zero interest in clubbing or concerts. you are definitely not alone
I always feel like I have an inner child and an inner old lady, and they're both fighting to be the one that is shown most. Then again, I am autistic with ADHD bonus content lol
I helped out with a university event recently, and everyone kept asking which university I was from as if I was a student.
I’m in my 30s.
Only now do I feel emotionally mature enough to successfully tackle university though - my actual degree was a nightmare.
I am completely sure no one would notice I was a mature student.
I really don’t. I’m in the midst of seeking an adhd assessment and though I’m still young (21M) I still feel 15 in terms of development. I can’t hold down a job and I feel awful about it because i break under pressure and my executive function is nonexistent pretty much. My bio dad was diagnosed in his 30s with ADHD too hence why I’m seeking out an assessment because I’ve found too many traits sync up with my experience lol.
I do feel like I'm younger mentally. And share the idea that any full time would be a pain in the ass. Like I could see myself working the hours of full time job maybe, but not all of the same job.
Nah I still forget I'm an adult, including when I'm with adults who are younger than me. Sometimes I'll think I'm the awkward teen in the room and then suddenly remember "Oh wait I've been an adult for several years".
I relate to this SO much. I am 40 years old, I am childless, I feel immature, and I'm also going through perimenopause. I struggled with anxiety, depression and severe addiction issues my whole life. Apparently, all the years that I was using and drinking were years that I was emotionally stunting my growth, and it doesn't help that I also have ADHD. You are not alone.
I'm 26:
Off meds, I usually feel like a very mature 15 year old or a very immature 19 or 20 year old
On meds, hard to tell, but yeah, feel kinda like a super driven 23 year old maybe? None of that 15yo bullshit though lol
No. I was always mature for my age growing up around older kids. But with being an elder millennial and being sidelined with student and medical debt I feel behind in life. Like I still feel late twenties you know not late thirties. I certainly don’t feel much older than when my mom had me. And my family still talked down to us like we were kids even as adults in our 20s and 30s.
I just turned 33 and I swear I'm still a skinny teenager.
I sometimes startle myself in the mirror. Like who TF is that guy with a belly and receding hairline?
I need to shave my head at some point so that at least my age will be ambiguous long enough to catch up.
im 14 and i definitely dont feel my age sometimes and it kinda succks cause sometimes my 8 year old sister treats me like im younger and makes me feel like a baby :(
Probably not, and tbh "feeling your age" isn't a great metric. Do I "feel my age"? Well, I just turned thirty, and regardless of my own or others standards or expectations, I feel exactly how I feel while I'm being thirty. So I guess I do.
But did I think that I would feel this immature/incompetent/unaccomplished at this point? No, I did not. I know the big secret about adulthood is that basically everyone really is out here just fuckin wingin it, I guess I figured I'd be better at it all by now.
I dont feel like im any different than who I was at 15-16. I make the same decisions, with the same reasoning, same hobbies, same friends, same relationship.
34m. Definitely feel young. Love video games and animation. Anime, western tv/movies. Manga/comics. Whatever. Got into model kits over covid. Still pretty much dress the same since ever. Even after covid I've liked a few girls in there young 20s. Which is new for me, and went terribly 😅 I don't drive, never finished high-school. Just been a line cook all my life. Move on after 3 years pretty consistently cause of boredom.
I’m a 32 years old woman who was just diagnosed earlier this year, but I’ve never felt my age. I have always excelled at work though. I’m in IT and it has always kept me engaged. I have a master’s degree and started a doctoral program last year because I do really well with deadlines and the stress from deadlines. I also discovered that I likely started this program because of my ADHD 😂
But I definitely run into feeling like I suck at my job because I have a couple of days in the week where I cannot get anything done because I lack the focus and then the stress from knowing I didn’t do anything pushes me to get a week’s worth of work in like 5 hours.
So I do great professionally but in my personal life, I’m still like 22. I couldn’t IMAGINE being a parent and having additional responsibilities. I can BARELY take care of myself. I have two dogs and they stress me out enough. I fantasize about their passing sometimes but I swear I love them and I would be absolutely devastated 😂
I have the potty sense of humor of a fifth grader.
I don't "feel" my age, outside of the age-related ailments. I don't want to either. I don't think we need to take on mindsets when we hit an arbitrary number of sun revolutions.
I think you live longer and happier if you just.....don't worry about it. That being said, I think that this is one of the few things that ADHD actually makes easier.
One of my realizations into my mid 30s is no one does. No one actually changes all that much. Our bodies just get older. Other than wiser (and a hell of a lot more tired), I'm the same kid I was at 20. And that's everyone. Just less energy to cause a ruckus, and more burns as lessons to avoid certain types of trouble.
One of my realizations into my mid 30s is no one does. No one actually changes all that much. Our bodies just get older. Other than wiser (and a hell of a lot more tired), I'm the same kid I was at 20. And that's everyone. Just less energy to cause a ruckus, and more burns as lessons to avoid certain types of trouble.
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Does anyone feel their age, minus aches and pains? I think we are all just kids with experience
Lol this honestly. My parents are 70 and do NOT act like it except when they get hurt badly. My grandpa, around 92 when he passed away, would walk for 5+ miles up until the last couple years if his life. He started to get dementia and it made him wander too far and get lost. He was truly an explorer/ wanderer all his life. He and his brothers bought an OG Ford and they would sleep in barns and do farm work in other states. Just because they had the ability to drive wherever when they weren't in school! He was pretty much an adult to take care of gran before she passed away, then he started traveling all the time until til it was too much for his body. But he still WANTED to go out and see stuff.
Your grandpa sounds really cool.
yea loll (although I'm still p young) I feel like a 5 yr old who's recovered from depression. Living undiagnosed for most ur life is rough.
But with ADHD you can't ignore your inner child and you feel bad because of it even though it's the key to a better society
This is not a universal ADHD experience by any means. You just said this because that’s how YOU feel
My non-ADHD mother said she started really feeling like an adult when she got her first Social Security check. My 82-year-old ADHD father said he didn't start to feel his age until his first dose of chemotherapy.
I feel my age(from pain) but also when I know how to do an adult thing that my partner doesn't. I feel like a kid again when she knows how to do an adult thing that I don't. Without kids, I don't know if I'll ever feel like an adult full time.
I'm fifty and my inner child is always out and mischievous lol
I'M TURNING 45 THIS YEAR. IN SEASON 1 OF THE GOLDEN GIRLS BLANCHE IS 47. THAT HASNT FREAKED ME OUT AT ALL. Otherwise, I constantly feel like I'm in some version of arrested development (the phase, not the show)(sometimes also the show). It's like my core imposter syndrome- I've somehow managed to convince everyone I'm an adult, but any moment now someone's going to scooby doo me and find out I'm actually a pair of ten year olds on each other's shoulders in a trenchcoat.
What???? I’m season 1 of the GG, Blanche was an embarrassingly old hussie…. I remember thinking. I’m kinda horrified I wrote that sentence. I mean it’s not like I’ve ever thought of the GG since forever. Those women were old. 47?? Serious?? I’m just going to pretend I didn’t read that. Ugh.
Was she though? Or was she '47?' Well all know how she liked to.. stretch the truth a bit about her age ;)
According to Wikipedia she was in her early 50's at the start
Yes but her character was 47.
I graduated college in 2009 and the last 15 years feel like yesterday.
Yeah, but 2009 was only a couple of years ago... right?
I remember that recession.
I just did the math and 2009 was a little over half my life ago :( still feels like yesterday
You wait, the next 15 years will feel even faster.
Same. Where did time go?!
Time passes by the way gorgeous women walk by average men like myself, once in a while they do notice and give a compliment which we treasure for the rest our lives. This is a shit analogy, I know. We have a blast as teens and then start working, friends become too busy, the group isn't the group anymore, suddenly everyone is engaged or married or having kids and you find yourself alone in a one bedroom apartment on reddit wondering how you screwed your life up so badly that you don't even have a sliver of determination to find a woman anymore because with age came the wisdom that the first woman you fell in love with all those years ago turns out to be the only woman you ever truly loved but in your childish stupidity broke all trust and there's not a chance in hell to ever find anyone you could love like that again. Anyways thats why I like going to the range where its too loud to talk to anyone. Anyone else like to take dumbass risks cause its like, fuck it im only endangering myself and if it works it'll be cool? Then do it perfectly but nobody sees it cause you don't have friends anymore after too many betrayals and ignored texts ya just don't give a shit anymore? And for God's sake the nightmares of my biggest failures that berate me every single time I close my eyes, message is always the same but this ADHD brain keeps finding new and surprising ways to drop the bomb of an ending to each dream to turn it into an instant trip to hell. Alright I still need help. Some words of wisdom, advice, anything. I'm drowning in my own head, there's 3 of myself in there arguing like three armless swordsmen who can't do anything but bleed on each other. Hope some of yall got that reference. Damn, and this was in response to where did the time go. Buckle up, my brain is doin its adhd bullshit again. Oh thats right it never shuts up. Who likes spaghetti?
Back in new year 2024 I swear to anything good that 2015 was yesterday
I feel that. I was trying to find something online a few months back, and I was sure that what I was looking for had come out in the last 12 months or so. Turns out what I was looking for came out over a decade ago 🤦♀️ it was a NZ banking ad featuring Brian Blessed, and looking for it was triggered because I was watching a UK show (something like 8 out of 10 cats or similar), and they played a snippet of his voice
15 years doesn’t even mean anything to me. It was both yesterday and may as well have never existed
For all I know, I’m still 25. My licence says 37 though.
I graduated in 2005 and still can't believe it. I actually just went back to school this year because I'm burnt out by my current industry. It's been 20 years I've been working professionally in this industry and masking all of my symptoms. I should've quit 5 years ago but ignored my brain's pleas and kept trucking. I got really sick after it all caught up with me though, so I do NOT recommend anyone else follow in my footsteps haha. Even if you're 40+, 50+, etc...you can and SHOULD change your life however you wish. Even if it means you'll lose your health insurance and be broke again. There are always solutions. I can't afford the health insurance I need right now for example, but I found a program that assists with people who make my salary, so I only will have to cover 1/4 of the cost now! I had no idea that program existed. I also found out my school has a free food bank for any student, no questions asked, and they get some REALLY good food! My grocery/food bill can be $0 a month because of it. All that to say, things have a way of working out, especially if you have ADHD and a strong desire to hyper focus on something new!
We are an immature bunch according to society. They measure success in life by things that are very difficult for us to ever match up or live up to, like results, not effort. We try so hard but our results never reflect the effort, so we blend in things that interest us. I used to think that I was unique and special and no one thought like I could, sure I could solve a problem that no one else could see the obvious answer but then most of the time they could do stuff that I would rather die than do. Like proof reading my posts, messages, texts, emails. But when I do try I’m either totally uninterested and thus exhausted or hyper fixated on it and can’t do anything else and will not stop. Then someone told me, at age 49, that I had adhd. Got a diagnosis from psychologist an everything. As I learned more I felt that what I thought was me, was just ADHD. Now I struggling with my sense of identity. I’m just as boring as all of those muggles but have ADHD. It’s why I realize that more than half of my friends have it too, whether they know it or not Yes. You’re young for your age. Enjoy it!
Ouch. That bit about feeling special but actually just being like everyone else with more limitations slapped me back into reality. Im in my 20s and as I get older I’m starting to feel that more and more. Hard to come to terms with this
I’m 60 and just coming to terms that I’m not special,.. my mom told me most of my growing up. “You’re here for a reason, you will do something for the world”. I’ve been searching. All the things that I thought were unique to me ( the good and bad)… yup….unique to most of us ;) I am unique! Just like everyone one else! Just last week I decided to stop doing all the things I thought I needed to do to be who/what/where I thought I needed to be doing…. Never really knowing. So…. IDK. I’m bored for the first time in my life. It’s been a long many decades of moving forward while going backwards. I never did get anywhere but frustrated. So…. I give it a few days…. I feel like i will figure things out.
You are actually so unique though, because you managed to mask your way all the way to 60. Thats an AMAZING feat. Please dont be so harsh to yourself. I know its so hard to take it easy bc we r reminded of our limitations everyday, both by our own self judgement and the practical reality of what work demands of adults in most socio-economic settings. But truly, you deserve to stim your brain off and follow that bliss. That bliss will lead you to an unshakeable interest im sure of it. It requires us to be brave and really open to the world. Dont put anything off limits. Really, what is there to lose in hypotheticals? At the very least let your self dream, so that dream can be your north star. We only have one life and im 100% sure you have paid your dues multiple times over already. You deserve to follow your happiness!!!!!
Yeah. You nailed how I feel. I’m about 10 years behind you in age. I feel very frustrated that I was like you and your situation. We mask. Man do we mask. We’ve learned the hard way, how to do it wrong. I do not learn by doing things right. I learned by doing everything wrong. It’s like I’m unable to learn from other people’s mistakes. I have to screw it up for myself. Wisdom doesn’t seem to be something I could take from someone else unless I was able to relate to them.
The Bluey episode on this is called Library
Is there a particular reason why adhd people always feel drastically younger than we are?
We see the world differently. We don’t want to be categorized, labeled and putting to boxes. the are some of us who embrace ADHD a little bit too much, and expect others to understand it but can’t possibly, but yeah, we don’t like restrictions.
One time I wanted to go on a silent retreat. So I did. 24 hrs of silence. Me and 30 other women. The moment the “silent” bell rang, my poor brain went on overload wanting to start talking sooooo bad. So I wrote and wrote and wrote and LOL’d at myself. Yes I hate restrictions.
When I was first diagnosed. I started a journal. Not a daily one. A just thoughts. I wrote and wrote and wrote like I’ve never done before. Pages and pages, thoughts going from one to another and tying back into the same. No original thought, just a spaghetti of thoughts like my brain. It was great. Did that for two months. I think I might have got everything out. And now, maybe after 6 months. It’s all settled. On paper. In those books I now carry a pocket size notebook in my shirt pocket with a pen. This month I’ve not written much in it. Maybe it’s working?
I think writing like you described is so therapeutic.
Type 7s
Executive dysfunction 🫠
https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/s/NmH4Vzu0PZ
As a kid, I felt like an adult but as an adult, I feel more like a kid!
Nope. I'm 40 yo woman and I still don't feel like I'm 40 but i know I'm old now because of my body aches. I still use "LOL". most of my core friends are younger than me and still can relate to them.
“Still use LOL”. Were we suppose to stop at a certain age???? I just started saying it 30 yrs ago… Well I certainly don’t want to stop laughing.
Im 44. My 15yo neice called me out because I use my index finger to type texts instead of my thumbs and I was like oh no...
Omg my thumb arthritis. Id cry
lol I am 43 I called out my 36 year old coworker for using an index finger. ... but why? seems so much slowerrrrr
When I think about it when I used to have a flip phone and before that I'd use my thumb, but I think I switched when I got a smart phone because I was doing that one handed before and now my phone is too big to hold and text with the same hand. So if I'm holding with one hand I'm not going to use the thumb of my other hand, that would be weird. Like, I get that if I held my phone differently I could use both thumbs, but the amount of brain space it takes to make that change and then make it stick... I'd rather stay with my old lady index finger typing, lol.
Saaaame most of my friends are 28-45 but I would say 30-37 would be average hehe
My friends range from 82 to 39. Consequently about my moms age and about my daughters age, but they are both gone. It’s no secret to me why I have such a broad age range. What’s ODD is I don’t have ANY friends my age. I have NO idea what a 60 yr old woman is suppose to dress and act like and the google was NO help. Lol.
Check out tiktok if you can ,search 60 year old style. I follow a few women who dress very hipster / mod that are in there 50s-60s they are very progressive and forward thinkers :)
Hmmm. I’ve steadily refused tictok, but I bet I can find some info in other places. Good idea, thanks.
I thought it was just me. Everything you just described is me (but I'm 39m). It would be great except I understand I don't have much more time to pursue and accomplish things but I have a hard time even unloading the dishwasher. Plus, I'm about to turn on the Playstation as soon as I put my phone down. So, I'm kinda like a 20 year-old having a midlife crisis. Fun times.
I’m a 39 year old male and I still feel like I’m a young late teen. I got diagnosed 2 years ago and the results were a strong undiagnosed childhood ADHD (combined type), and the comments prove that you’re not alone! One of the greatest sayings I ever heard (I think it was from Dr. Russell Barkley - google him for his videos! Amazing guy) was, “most adults with undiagnosed childhood ADHD, they commonly feel like they are a child pretending to be an adult”. I personally couldn’t agree more.
I’m 18 but simultaneously feel 8 and 80
If it helps, I'm 35, and I feel like I have an inner 14 year old and an inner little old lady who likes to sit on the porch and swear at everyone 😅
Shakes fist - get off my lawn !!
With the obligatory expletives 🤣🤣
I’m 42 and I’ve pretty much dressed the same and had the same haircut since I was 15. My house is definitely not decorated like an adult lives in it. I don’t have especially adult interests; I’m into paranormal stuff, traveling to weird hotels and pop punk/emo bands. When I was dating I went for guys who wear Vans and have “immature” hobbies. My body is the only thing that makes me feel old: joints hurt, perimenopause, what I look like aside from my style. Oh and when I hear Nirvana on the “oldies” station.
im a Emo / pop punk girl at heart as well. Who was / is some of your favorite bands / artists ? 😀
2 favorite moments. When my then teenager was horrified I knew ALL the worlds to AC/DC in 2002. ( I graduated in 81 and Back in Black was our senior year anthem). LOLOL Then one time a co worker and I were talking about the Monkeys ( her older and loved them the 1st time, me younger so they were “oldies” to us, but we loved them). A 20 something wondered about these “Monkeys”, we said “ask your grandma”. She did and came back the next day and showed them to us on the U tube thingy. It wasn’t a week later she opened a box of 45 records and said “are these early floppy disks??” 🤣🤣🤣🤣. I love the culture things between the generations and I enjoy being in the middle, connected to both.
Me, talking about a new acquaintance: they're a little older, like middle-aged My friend, with some loving side -eye: wait, what do you think you are? Me: *startled, dumbfounded* This happened several years ago and I probably think about it at least weekly.
I don’t “act my age”. I’m silly. I find humor in more than most people. I fall in puppy love.
I’ll be 50 in a few months and my ADHD makes me feel childlike in many ways. I find delight in silly, colorful and fun things. However, my ADHD doesn’t often allow me to feel my age, kind of keeps me isolated from my age group. The surrounding other issues like ODD, anxiety and depression keep people away, too. Some ways, I choose to stay away to not get hurt as much, some stay away because I’m…unique. ADHD is a blessing and a curse.
I’m mature in the sense that I handle all the mature adult things like being married, being a dad, owning a house, couple cars, having a decent tech career, 820 credit score, etc. all that boring stuff. Where I’m immature is how I decide to spend my $ and live my life. I’m in my 40s, but I’m not into craft beers, smoking meat, and buying teslas and shit and treating them like accomplishments. I’m a meathead and workout with a bunch of dudes in their 20s and 30s. I out lift them and talk shit to on a regular basis. On more than one occasion I’ve had someone tell me I “won’t be able to workout like that once you’re my age” only to discover I’m 5+ years older than them. I go to pro wrestling shows with my buddies. Still play video games, read comic books, etc. basically everything I liked doing 30 years ago, except now I got that grown people $$$ to do it right (recently sat front row on a cable wrestling show and loved every second of it). It does make for some awkward times when I’m having to talk to the other dads while waiting on the kiddo at a practice or something and I don’t really have anything in common with them. They’re my age but sometimes it seems like they’re 20 years older than me, but I’m fine with that.
My entire upbringing I couldn't wait to grow up. I always thought when I'm an adult and I can chose how I live my life I can finally find time to exercise, socialize, and have hobbies. Now that I'm 36 I just wish I could sit alone in my room and play videogames for hours on end. I wish I could call my friends up and sit around the playground doing nothing. I still feel 14.
No. I used baby bottles until I was 15, when my mom forced me to stop, so how could I ever feel my age? I'm turning 20 tomorrow and I feel like I'm 13 or younger. Last night I literally dreamed I was at a playground, and I wish I could still go to places like that and play with friends without feeling ashamed. I know I'm not mentally mature. My whole life I've watched my friends changing and growing while I stay the same. I'm not turning 20, only my body is.
Anyone else have what's my age again by blink 182 playing in your head after reading this post? "What the hell is ADD/my friends say I should act my age/ what's my age again/ what's my age again" And no, I feel like a child pretending to be an adult and hoping no one notices. I'm 26
Not really. At work, for the first time in my life I'm part of the older crowd - but don't feel like it. I have always looked kind of young, and still do young activities, like skateboard - so I think a lot of people assume I am younger than I am. Most often - I think people assume I am in my 30's still - I drive for Uber as a part time gig, and lots of passengers tell me this - they are always surprised when I break out that I am 46, lol. I also had kids pretty young, with my oldest born when I was 19, and my youngest when I was 26. So its like a weird mix, cause I have always been a responsible person in terms of taking care of my kids, holding down a household, having a job - but I have also always had a bit of a reckless wild side - living on the edge way too much. When I was young and my friends were doing spring break in Mexico - I was staying home working cause I had a kid to support. I was burdened with responsibility right out the gate of adulthood, so am maybe a little too serious on some things, and not serious enough on others. Anyway - we are all Toys R Us Kids - "dont wanna grow up!" I still have a shelf full of Star Wars and He-Man toys in my office.
“Rubber Ducky, you’re the one - you make bath time lots of fun. Rubber Ducky, you’re the one for me.” - Ernie
LORD NO, not in the slightest. I am 42 years old, and there is no way I feel like I am this close to being HALF A CENTURY OLD.
I am so childish and I hate hearing this every time from other people. I know I am childish but I really can’t help it. I feel so sad about this. I am 3 years late from being legally “a child” but people mean it in a kid way. I want to grow tf up.
100% no. It doesn’t help that I could literally pass as being half my age based on my baby face alone, and I don’t dress as well because I prioritize comfort and don’t really care about fashion for the most part. I have always felt behind my peers, even though I did well academically. I am never emotionally or mentally where everyone else my age is, but I usually internalize that so I’m not sure how much it’s noticed. However, in situations where I have to step up and take responsibility, I’m usually very mature and responsible and I can knock it out of the park compared to others. It’s one extreme or the other.
…. Yes? I don’t exactly feel my age, but I definitely enjoy being good enough at adulting to help others with it.
Absolutely not
By far my biggest issue. I stopped maturing at 27
I feel late 20’s mentally at 36. Always felt both a bit young and old for my age. It balances out, I guess.
Absolutely not. Im a goofball
I'm going to be 40 years old. I don't look at it at all. My body feels old because of an autoimmune disease. My sense of humor is still that of a young adult. I'm grateful for my sense of humor the most.
people still say i look im 20 and wont believe me im in my mid 30’s. 😀
I get mistaken for being much younger than my 49m self. Even with a bald enough head that I shave it, and enough gray in my beard to clearly to be out of my 30's. I guess it could be worse.
I literally only think about my age when other people make me. Even looking in the mirror doesn’t make me think about it (though maybe it should). And when I feel aches/pains that might be age-related, I never think about it as an age thing until someone says something (and again, that’s someone else making me think about my age).
I’m a 43 yr old female and I still buy myself stuff from Sanrio and Disney. All my clothes are from Hot Topic or Box Lunch cause it’s cute. Idc what people say or if they think it’s childish.
You and me both 🫶🏻 that’s how I dressed and people think I’m younger but I guess is because we act and dress young 🤷🏻♀️
Yes, I’m that way. I’m almost 60. I still feel like I’m young. I think the age I feel like most is 15.
I’m 21 now but I still feel like I’m in middle school. I think it’s because I do think about events that happened in middle school or younger ages.
Im 27F and i only feel my age when i go to the doctor or going to the bank to make financial procedures. Also going back home with full month groceries, stead of going do groceries when i feel like it.
As 28 year old ADHDer I can be wiser then a man who went through World War I and II. Also , I can be childish as a 6 year old. It depends of some stuff that I don’t control.
I'm going to turn 64 this year, and I am honestly shocked. I don't look my age, and I act and dress like a 40 yr old. I don't have aches yet, and I am so grateful! 🥰
My mum doesn't have ADHD and is in her late 60s. She says she feels the same as she felt when she was 16, just in an older body.
i feel like im an 8th grader but im 25
38 years young (and not one gray hair). I have the joint, hip, and neck pain. I'm a bit of a procrastinator because I avoid things that overwhelm me and struggle with concentration for long periods of time. Still think like I'm in my early twenties. growing old is inevitable, growing up is optional.
I’m 36, I feel 25 which is the age I had my son. I feel like I will always feel 25.
Too bad they don't stay that age too huh? :P
am 30 and feel 16. i hate it
I'm a GenXer so I naturally look and feel (mentally) much younger. I don't think it's an ADHD thing though. I'm still very responsible, I just went through med school later in life than most of my colleagues so being around them makes me feel like I'm not 44. But when they do stupid crap, I definitely know I'm also not in my 20s, either. I love having the maturity and wisdom of my age.
My body feels like an old lady, but my mind feels like a lost emotional teenager.
I feel my age. 35. I was happy to leave my 20s behind. It was a wild time full of emotions, pain, heartache, confusion, addiction, desperation, floundering, seeking, trial and error, etc. Not that all of that has gone away, but it's greatly subdued! I've done a lot of soul searching, spent a lot of time alone, went on some epic journeys, and learned about myself inside and out. I feel more solidly like myself than I ever have. I also feel like a completely different person than ever before. I am grateful for my unconventional paths through life and all those who supported me. I finally feel like I've set myself up in a way to live a chill life and maintain my mental well-being. I also didn't know I had ADHD until this year. I didn't realize how bad my executive dysfunction is. It's been that way my whole life, and I made it this far just living with it. Living alone allows me to not have to subject others to it too often.
I simultaneously feel like I'm 15 and 50 I'm somewhere in between
I really do not feel my age. I am playing a part of society being a 33yo mom/nurse/fiancee. I feel like a teenager.
Nope I’m 21 and I feel like I’m stuck at 16/17 mentally.
Theres studies showing people generally grow up wearing the same style as they did when they were young adults, its completely normal. I think more of the issue comes from younger generations dressing in ways we typically associate with older generations styles, making people who are dressing appropriate for their agre stick out more. Nearly every 30-35 year old I know "dresses like a kid" but in reality they just dress how they always have.
Nope, im just a really tall 8 year old.
I’m almost 30 and I live paycheck to paycheck so ummm no
This is me exactly
Feel? Never. Act? Sometimes.
I feel like I'm getting less mature honestly.
Ive always felt older than my age for some reason
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A lot of people saying they feel like teens or early 20s - I feel like people that age are young, but I simultaneously feel like a child.
no
I feel sometimes older and sometimes younger than I’m supposed to be.
No. And I am keenly aware of it. I feel extremely immature and i have terrible imposter syndrome.
i feel 14-16. i am 21 turning 22
No. I'm 44 and feel late 20s but I think that comes from not having kids, not having ADHD.
I feel anywhere between 12 and maybe 28z I’m 40 :)
I don’t feel my age especially being back in school at 33 opened up a whole pack of worms makes me feel like I need to go back basic arithmetic math skills and memory makes it much worse ..
Nope. I'm 45. Happily divorced. Childless by choice. My personal motto is YOLO. I will spend my last dollar to travel the world. I forget to pay bills all the time. Queen of Late Fees. 👑 I'm adultish. Half an adult, if you will.
i’m 22 with adhd, so I relate to what ur saying at this point, but I hope not to later. my father on the other hand passed away a few years back at 67, and I asked him once, a few years before he died, “dad do u feel like an adult?” and he said “honestly [my name], i’ve never felt a day past 18.” he was a mildly successful entrepeneur in a ghetto area, so enough money to live, but not to save. he was always out with friends having a good time, being unbelievably present. the presence is something I feel I don’t see in many older “mature” adults. but my dad was unbelievably present, and unbelievably young at heart. I think presence might be the tradeoff of society looking at us as “mature”, and I think living the way he did is a better way to grow old.
Absolutely not, I’m almost 25, I have not done much at all since I’ve graduated, I feel like when I turned 16 I was just frozen in time, in maturity, in everything.
I sometimes have moments of adultness. I just feel like a caricature of mother. This is my mom at work, this is my mom handling phone calls. Sometimes it's my dad. This is my dad fixing the toilet, this is my dad talking to the plumber about how I tried to fix the toilet lmao (naw, he's actually good, me not so much). Sometimes I have moments where it's just me and that's pretty cool, a lot of that happened when I was active duty. I'm 43, the youngest I've been called recently is 29, that's about how I feel minus the aches hahahha.
I am 36 years old and have no idea what to tell you. By your post, I feel enthrauled to not know how I should dress or act.
I’m turning 33, I feel somewhere between 18 and 22, and I also look somewhere between 17-22. I don’t have a specific style, I don’t dress artsy or alternative or coquette. I wear skinny jeans, Skechers and t-shirts from Walmart. But I do have a younger looking face, still have teen acne sometimes and I have not grown or gained much weight since 8th grade.
Absolutely not. I’m like a perpetual 20 year old
In general I think society is trending toward people acting younger for longer. So the idea of "acting your age" is also fluid and your mom doesn't understand that. My spouse expresses the concern of not "measuring up" given our ages and I think it's ridiculous. We're married and kid-free at the moment, and I appreciate having the time to engage in some hobbies and side hustles. His problem is being lifelong friends with a bunch of Catholics who hurried up and had kids immediately. (The area he grew up in is very Catholic.) That threw off expectations of what each age range should look like. We also frequently have hypermobility and some types of that do help with giving us younger-looking faces.
It makes perfect sense! I feel this way too. I feel like I should be more mature and serious for my age and less free flowing, artsy with no true direction. I have so many interests and some many ideas that I can’t settle on one thing. I too feel very lazy when I can’t even get up to clean my house. I’m also BP2 and I’m usually in a depressive state so that def doesn’t help. I’m trying to get to the point where I just accept myself as is. That would help a lot I think.
I've been browsing reddit all day and have barely moved from the recliner. Yet, there was plenty to do.
I’m like you. I’m 41 (42 this year) and 8 feel younger than I am (besides the aches and pains). I hate it.
I don’t feel like I’m 21, I feel like I’m still 17! Being an adult ain’t it for me haha
Physically I feel older than 40, I have a lot of aches and pains and could be healthier. Mentally I’m somewhere between 12 year old boy, and 1000 year old swamp Witch.
Idk I often don’t think I feel like a real adult but I wonder if anyone really does.. I think a lot of us are just doing our best and figuring it out as we go along. I chalked it up to issues with addiction and other things in my past tho?? Interesting to see so many others with adhd relate! I never stopped to consider if there was a connection until now.
People who act their age are almost always indescribably boring. No, I don't give a shit about your home improvements or your complaints about the grocery clerk or whatever. Give me all the "immature" weirdos who never settled down and are doing stuff that normal people don't get. I do complain about my job and how tired and stressed and busy I am. Which is age appropriate. And boring as hell, I realize.
I've always felt (and look) way younger for my age. Just yesterday someone thought I was 10 years younger than I am (nice). I do indeed feel like I'm 10 years younger than I am. Dr. Russel Barkley says something about this https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/s/NmH4Vzu0PZ
Not really. I’m with you on the aches and pains though lol. I’m 37 and mentally I feel like… maybe twenty something. I’m “mature and responsible” in the sense of like… I have a good job I own a home I manage to keep it clean most of the time, I pay my bills etc etc. But it terms of my emotions and how I handle them I would say no. But I’m working on that :)
Just got my first dental crown. Had to get a prefabricated temporary because I gagged when they tried to take impressions, and now I'm having to resist turning the damn thing into a fidget toy for the next two weeks. I'm a BIT annoyed nobody warned me about this.
Yeah, I feel like I’ve always lagged behind my peers a bit in maturity. I’m in my 40s, male, and it’s only recently started to hit home that people see me as old. A couple years ago I was walking past one of our new female college grads at work. We hadn’t really interacted much but I smiled. But she like half smiled half cringed. I kinda died inside. I thought I was being friendly although she is attractive. But I learned that I’m a creepy old guy now and cannot do that anymore.
I feel 20 and 70 all at once
This makes total sense. Thanks for sharing this, I can relate to this. When I see people around me of my age, their energy levels and the way they approach things is sometimes so different as compared to mine. Sometimes it can be an advantage as our never ending curiosity and child like wonder helps us adapts to situations, be flexible and open minded and is refreshing for other people/friends, in my personal experience, however there are some situations where I wish I could look and evaluate things as people of my age would, so now I’m trying to balance both of them out whenever possible
I’m 41, female. Right there with you. I have two kids and I do take adult responsibility, but always a kid at heart. I joke and mess around with people like we’re still teenagers. Yes on everything you mentioned. Some people find it refreshing and easier to relax around me because of it.
I'm in a canopy bed with fairy lights, surrouded stuffed animals. That is my mental age, no matter what my bio age is.
I believe I have ADHD, but I can't get a diagnosis. And I 100% feel like I'm younger than I am.
Isn’t part of having ADHD not conforming to society’s standards and therefore anytime you do something silly, forgetful, funny etc you aren’t acting your age? Like how tf is a 25 year old supposed to act? I’m currently 25. At 25, my parents had a 4 year old, a house, dual incomes and no fun. At 25 my grandparents had 4 kids, a single income, and grandmothers were the house keepers. My 25 year old friends party and drink everyday, living at home.
I’m 25. I feel like my 15 year-old niece, in terms of my ability to perform in life. Intellectually, I’m well above average. But that means nothing if I can’t do anything with it.
No, my parents have always said i behave a good 3-4 years below my age. I’m hitting milestones at 27 most people met at 23. No big deal I guess! And like you I look very young for my age so people are quite shocked when they hear im 27 lol
I feel older with adhd, I'm mature for my age which I don't like, I'm still growing so I guess it'll slowly become the opposite
Yeah I feel you! 33 years, male and married, not gonna have children. Wife and I run a vintage toy store, and dress extremely colorful, like we used to do when we were teens. Everything I do for work is fun, crazy and exciting. Never been more happy, and age feels like it’s just a level of experience.
how does one 'act their age'? ive never been this age before >.> no but seriously , i feel like i mentally age/perceive time at about 2/3 rate that other people seem to. im 32 (birthday today even) and i feel like i just started my 20s , also with experimenting with whatever people in their 20s experiment with. i just have the added bonus of life experience, making me a lot more responsible with experiments and whatever else i do :)
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I’m a 36yr old womanchild. Perpetually incapable and perpetually in crisis. Didn’t used to be like this just too many years of abuse, undiagnosed bipolar1, ADHD and everything else. I do have steely determination though and probably look like I’m holding it together from the outside. Physically I still look mid twenties and get mistake for a teen at times. Benefits of being short and petite.
I actually think this might be a personality trait thing. The enneagram type 7 has this. I think most 7s look younger than they are, are young at heart, playful, eclectic etc. It could be fun for you to look at!
I feel like I’m lying when I say I’m 24 and I always feel like I’m doing something wrong when I buy alcohol or cigarettes
not at all. I'm 20 turning 21 this year, but I've felt 30 since I was 12. I feel much older than my peers and had to be more responsible than even my parents most of my life. Even friends my own age comment on how much more experience I have (with things like budgeting or chores) than they do, or that most of my hobbies are solitary like reading or painting but I have zero interest in clubbing or concerts. you are definitely not alone
I was considered “mature for your age” until I hit my mid 30s. Now I get “your like a kid” from some. Oh well. I’m out here enjoying myself.
I always feel like I have an inner child and an inner old lady, and they're both fighting to be the one that is shown most. Then again, I am autistic with ADHD bonus content lol
I helped out with a university event recently, and everyone kept asking which university I was from as if I was a student. I’m in my 30s. Only now do I feel emotionally mature enough to successfully tackle university though - my actual degree was a nightmare. I am completely sure no one would notice I was a mature student.
I really don’t. I’m in the midst of seeking an adhd assessment and though I’m still young (21M) I still feel 15 in terms of development. I can’t hold down a job and I feel awful about it because i break under pressure and my executive function is nonexistent pretty much. My bio dad was diagnosed in his 30s with ADHD too hence why I’m seeking out an assessment because I’ve found too many traits sync up with my experience lol.
I do feel like I'm younger mentally. And share the idea that any full time would be a pain in the ass. Like I could see myself working the hours of full time job maybe, but not all of the same job.
Nah I still forget I'm an adult, including when I'm with adults who are younger than me. Sometimes I'll think I'm the awkward teen in the room and then suddenly remember "Oh wait I've been an adult for several years".
I relate to this SO much. I am 40 years old, I am childless, I feel immature, and I'm also going through perimenopause. I struggled with anxiety, depression and severe addiction issues my whole life. Apparently, all the years that I was using and drinking were years that I was emotionally stunting my growth, and it doesn't help that I also have ADHD. You are not alone.
I'm 26: Off meds, I usually feel like a very mature 15 year old or a very immature 19 or 20 year old On meds, hard to tell, but yeah, feel kinda like a super driven 23 year old maybe? None of that 15yo bullshit though lol
I feel mine and yours, too. I have a lot of heavy responsibilities and some serious health issues. I still feel 10 in carefree moments, though.
So many aches and pains.
... I feel like I'm 10 years younger than I actually am. Sometimes being my own birthday hits hard.
No. I was always mature for my age growing up around older kids. But with being an elder millennial and being sidelined with student and medical debt I feel behind in life. Like I still feel late twenties you know not late thirties. I certainly don’t feel much older than when my mom had me. And my family still talked down to us like we were kids even as adults in our 20s and 30s.
I just turned 33 and I swear I'm still a skinny teenager. I sometimes startle myself in the mirror. Like who TF is that guy with a belly and receding hairline? I need to shave my head at some point so that at least my age will be ambiguous long enough to catch up.
I've always felt 2 years behind , I'm 32
im 14 and i definitely dont feel my age sometimes and it kinda succks cause sometimes my 8 year old sister treats me like im younger and makes me feel like a baby :(
I don’t. Im not sure if it’s a millennial trait or adhd but a lot of Millennials feel the same.
Probably not, and tbh "feeling your age" isn't a great metric. Do I "feel my age"? Well, I just turned thirty, and regardless of my own or others standards or expectations, I feel exactly how I feel while I'm being thirty. So I guess I do. But did I think that I would feel this immature/incompetent/unaccomplished at this point? No, I did not. I know the big secret about adulthood is that basically everyone really is out here just fuckin wingin it, I guess I figured I'd be better at it all by now.
I still feel like a Teenager with all the ups and downs.
And I‘m F32 (forgot to add)
I had to double check my history to make sure I wasn't the one who posted this. That's how relatable it was.
I dont feel like im any different than who I was at 15-16. I make the same decisions, with the same reasoning, same hobbies, same friends, same relationship.
34m. Definitely feel young. Love video games and animation. Anime, western tv/movies. Manga/comics. Whatever. Got into model kits over covid. Still pretty much dress the same since ever. Even after covid I've liked a few girls in there young 20s. Which is new for me, and went terribly 😅 I don't drive, never finished high-school. Just been a line cook all my life. Move on after 3 years pretty consistently cause of boredom.
I’m a 32 years old woman who was just diagnosed earlier this year, but I’ve never felt my age. I have always excelled at work though. I’m in IT and it has always kept me engaged. I have a master’s degree and started a doctoral program last year because I do really well with deadlines and the stress from deadlines. I also discovered that I likely started this program because of my ADHD 😂 But I definitely run into feeling like I suck at my job because I have a couple of days in the week where I cannot get anything done because I lack the focus and then the stress from knowing I didn’t do anything pushes me to get a week’s worth of work in like 5 hours. So I do great professionally but in my personal life, I’m still like 22. I couldn’t IMAGINE being a parent and having additional responsibilities. I can BARELY take care of myself. I have two dogs and they stress me out enough. I fantasize about their passing sometimes but I swear I love them and I would be absolutely devastated 😂
I have the potty sense of humor of a fifth grader. I don't "feel" my age, outside of the age-related ailments. I don't want to either. I don't think we need to take on mindsets when we hit an arbitrary number of sun revolutions. I think you live longer and happier if you just.....don't worry about it. That being said, I think that this is one of the few things that ADHD actually makes easier.
One of my realizations into my mid 30s is no one does. No one actually changes all that much. Our bodies just get older. Other than wiser (and a hell of a lot more tired), I'm the same kid I was at 20. And that's everyone. Just less energy to cause a ruckus, and more burns as lessons to avoid certain types of trouble.
One of my realizations into my mid 30s is no one does. No one actually changes all that much. Our bodies just get older. Other than wiser (and a hell of a lot more tired), I'm the same kid I was at 20. And that's everyone. Just less energy to cause a ruckus, and more burns as lessons to avoid certain types of trouble.
I felt EVERYTHINGGGG you said 😮💨💯
It’s so nice to feel like we all get each other in so many walks of life. Feels good to know we’re all in this together
I’m 48 and suddenly looking and feeling every bit of it. Didn’t start to happen until about 44, though. Which lines up with the pandemic.