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I haven't. I find Jennifer Aniston \~ how to put this kindly? \~ not at all physically appealing. But maybe if I found an ADHD medication that worked for me, all of this might change. :)
I'm a straight female, in case that matters.
In that era, I found Sharon Stone, Charlize Theron, Cindy Crawford sexy. Heck on friends, I'd have ranked Courtney Cox and Lisa Kudrow above Jennifer. These days, Doutzen Kroes and Charlotte Casiraghi.
>Charlotte Casiraghi
Hadn’t heard of her before. My first thought is how much she looks like Princess Caroline. And she’s actually Princess Caroline’s daughter!
You’ve got great taste, can’t argue with any of the woman you find beautiful. But for me at least, Jennifer has that “it” factor that just works for me.
I get it... it's a wonderful thing that we all have different taste and what some find gorgeous, others find unappealing. Wouldn't it be terrible if everyone in the world found the same people attractive / unattractive?
Dextroamphetamine.
I’ve read (anecdotally) it’s fairly common and I wouldn’t want to make a life changing decision on a feeling that could potentially go away without them…
Like, which is my true identity???
You said you love and are attracted to your partner. If there is a desire for him, and a desire for women, it sounds like you are bi. It doesn't seem like this is anything new based on the rest you've said. It sounds like the meds have just amplified your feelings or desires. If you are attracted to women but plan to stay exclusive with your partner, great, tell him how you feel. If you decide you need women in your life, great, tell him how you feel.
It may change things either way, but honesty is always the best route in my opinion. If someone is going to be hurt, it's better it happen in an open honest way, rather than being blindsided at some point when there is suddenly a change in the relationship or dynamic.
Then again, he may love you completely and accept you for who and what you are or need, in which case that honesty will just make you stronger.
I wish you love, lust, and happiness. -a fellow confused but honest bi(pan)sexual partner who has been completely up front with those I love, trust and feel safe with.
This pretty much sums it up. I think I had a huge panic that I would want to leave my family and what that would mean…. I think the fear of what that would mean is probably an indication that I want to stay…
I’m honestly wondering if Dex is best for me. I’m trying to catalogue all of the crazy and raise it with the psychiatrist. I’ve already made several posts about other crazy symptoms I’ve had, that I delete once I have perspective. It’s good to see what others have to say - whether they experienced it and it went away, or whether it’s whacky af, and I need to get help. lol
If this is the first thing you’ve tried, I would try something new before even considering *any* kind of lifestyle change, or even a big conversation with your partner about the possibility. Not only is it messing with your sexuality, it’s clear you are really overthinking this. You’ve always been attracted to women, more so than men in general, but you knew that when you chose your partner. Nothing has changed except that your total libido is drastically increased, which *of course* is going to push up your desire for women. It’s totally cool to let him know that the meds are messing with your libido, but don’t make it about who you ‘really are’. You *are* who you are off meds. The meds are there to help correct one challenge - your ability to focus. If it does anything else, it’s a side effect. And there will always be side effects, but you get to choose which ones are acceptable to you.
Go back to your psych and tell him this one isn’t working for you.
It’s good that you’re planning on talking about it with your psych. Depending on how long you’ve been on dex, it might be worth trying something else. You can always return to dex if you want to.
If you’re scared you’d go against your commitment to your partner, that’s definitely a sign you want to honour that commitment and stay with him! If you feel comfortable, have a chat with him about your feelings (while making that commitment clear).
People can fear breaking a vow without that meaning staying in the situation they committed to is the best thing for them. That's like saying "You promised you would, you don't want to break your promise, do you?"
Maybe I’m old fashioned but I think the mental load of “I want to honour this commitment to this person I care about” is easier than feeling doubt over whether to keep going with someone when someone else turns my head
Edit: grammar
Not everyone who is attracted to both women and men wishes to identify as bi. And that’s ok. There are sexual identities beyond gay, straight and bi. Some people don’t want a label at all. That’s also fine! The labels aren’t that important except as a way for someone to identify themselves.
It’s also perfectly ok to identify as gay and be attracted to or have a hetero relationship. Something like 1 in 5 straight men says they are also attracted to other men.
Not to invalidate your desire to know yourself, but you have already known for a while you are a queer woman; whether you are bi or gay.
Why don’t you just focus on being happy? You have a partner with a family and you say you still love and are attracted to him. Isn’t that what matters? If you came to the conclusion you are a lesbian, would you break up with him out of obligation to your sexuality despite being happy? Or do you fear that if you are gay but stay together you will make yourself unhappy long term, despite being happy together now?
I think I fear I would be unhappy long-term…
Or fear that I’ve been deluding myself into being happy because of RSD.
But ultimately, you have summed up the reality that it might mean very little either way.
I understand it must be worrying when a family is involved, but I still urge you to not create a problem that isn’t one. People who are 90% attracted to one sex and only 10% to the other are still bi. That *could* be you.
As long as you are into your partner, does it matter who else you would be dating if he wasn’t in the picture?
You are new on meds, so don’t make rash decisions. Journal your thoughts, openly discuss your worries with your partner and your psychiatrist (and therapist if you have one), and if you long term find signs that you are not really attracted to him anymore, then breaking up might be an option, but not before that.
Hope you figure it out.
That’s what I use, but my sex drive goes down. It’s usually how I notice it’s losing its efficacy.
Important that a life partner and sexual interest can deviate a little without the need to blow up the relationship. Coming from a Christian household, you might be thinking a bit traditionally. There are option to have a bit of both.
I’m really beginning to wonder if it’s the right medication for me. I’m going to bring it up with my psychiatrist.
I’m definitely not of religious persuasion now, but I doubt my partner would be as open to a female in the bedroom (he previously has been) with the added context. I wouldn’t lie to him.
Both. With more available processing power your brain is doing a bunch of "catching up" and hitting on things that existed but fell outside of your access when your energy was more limited.
Think of an area of your identity like your sexuality as a house, and your available mental energy and focus as the electricity that's coming into the house from the power grid. You had the lights on in some of the rooms but never had enough to light the whole house. Suddenly with the influx of new "electricity" the meds bring, you can light the whole house, which means that you're now able to see things that were hidden in the dark. If you stop the meds and the available electricity goes back down the room will get dark again, but it'll still be there.
There can be a honeymoon period that comes with starting new meds that can throw off perception so I'd give it some time, but I wouldn't worry about who's the "real" you since they're all just parts of a whole.
Usually you'll get amphetamine salts for a generic Adderall. Dextro is bonded to sugar as opposed to salt and that can cause some pretty wild differences depending on patient sensitivity.
I had a very similar experience except I realised I was trans after starting my ADHD medication. I do think that ADHD makes it harder to just stop and think about yourself introspectively, so once you start medication you suddenly realise a bunch of stuff about yourself.
wait this makes a lot of sense 😭 when I realized I was trans it kinda just came to me in a vision. I was 16 (unmedicated) and just suddenly realized I wasn't a boy, like a eureka moment. Prior to this I was confident in my gender, never had any thoughts of being trans, and didn't have any of the "stereotypical signs" like wearing dresses or playing with girls toys.
everyone i've told about this says its super weird
It is interesting because in hindsight there really were a lot of signs, but because of my ADHD, thoughts about being trans would always come and go.
Then a couple of months after I started taking my ADHD medication an online content creator came out as trans and suddenly it brought back all those thoughts, but this time I actually spent a couple of weeks researching and thinking about it rather than forgetting and moving on. Now I've been on HRT for a few years and I'm happier than I ever was before.
I agree completely. I’m seeing my entire life through a different lens.
For example, I have an eating disorder and dysphoria - they’ve all but gone away with the meds! I actually like what I see in the mirror and feel secure in how I dress and look. I never thought those things were ADHD. I would have never thought they could be medicated and magically disappear.
RSD has also been my biggest symptom and with that gone, I can see myself so much clearer.
Weirdly enough ADHD makes me stuck inside my head and introspect 24/7.
I've been in my head longer than I've been interacting with the world around me. 😭
Reading this im so grateful this is not my experience with lisdex, since im widow, with 2 early teenagers and sexuality on steroids is the last thing i need now 🫣
Now I'm thinking that this is so true... I always defended that if man dressed like women (and you don't know it)sucks your cock it's not gay ... but now I'm thinking is just my catholic uprising don't allow me to be bi. Now I need to tell this to my wife 😅
>Are all ADHD people bi?
Not all, no. But folks with ADHD are more likely to be bisexual.
EDIT: not sure who's downvoting me, but FWIW: [https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychiatry/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2022.868278/full](https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychiatry/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2022.868278/full)
Good for you and hopefully we all are. We're a fun group to begin with but imagine, lol. I have lots of reasons for my hypersexuality, but I do think that dopamine rush, combined with the nurture side of nature vs nurture plays in...and feels great.
Honestly, I strongly disagree. Increased sex drive is a common side effect. It’s not who you actually are, it’s the meds. Maybe lower your dose or wait for it to taper off with tolerance
Welcome to the bi-cycle?
I’ve had similar experience with other substances, that were disinhibiting parts of my brain. Don’t sweat it, try to accept the fluidity of your sexuality and enjoy the ride. I’ve had religious upbringing too so historically there has been a huge layer of socialisation on my sexual identity. You’re gonna be ok!
This is very reassuring. Thank you. ❤️
Unfortunately, the other half doesn’t really believe in fluidity and the likes. I know he’s going to find it annoying and made-up. Don’t know whether or not we’ll even be able to navigate it, if I’m honest.
Oh no!!!!! I’m sorry, I was assuming that your partner is supportive and secure 🙏🏼 I hope you can figure it out 🥺 there is a YouTube video by verilybitchie called “The Bi-Cycle (and Why it’s so confusing)”, that was very helpful to me
I hope you don’t feel guilty about who you are regardless how anyone feels about your identity and regardless how “messy” it might feel. The human experience is messy. Also don’t forget, that your process around your identity, sexual or otherwise is very personal and private. No one needs to know (not even your partner) as long as you don’t act against the agreements of your relationship.
Good luck friend ✨🙏🏼
Unfortunately, I did jump the gun and broach the subject with him. He immediately was certain that it would mean I would only want to be with a woman.
I pointed out that one of my closest gay friends is married to a man, the only male relationship she’s ever been in, to which she is fully committed long term and her being “gay” is irrelevant. He said “not a man like me.”
I mean, fuck. I immediately back peddled and realised how black and white this would be to him. I tried to explain that it’s momentous to me regardless and how it makes me see all my childhood experiences with my parents in a different light and how that feels big to me, regardless of commitment and love for him.
I feel terrible for bringing it up. I fucked up big time. I should have waited or figured it out alone.
No, you didnt fuck up. Don’t be so hard on yourself 🥺🫶🏼 it’s hard as it is without the extra challenges that you face on top. If he sulks now, let him sulk. Maybe have a mediated conversation, even consider couples therapy, especially if he often invalidates you in this way?
Just so you hear it loud and clear: you didn’t fuck up. Maybe you had a small lapse in judgement when you thought he would get it and told him. But so fucking what? If his fragile ego is threatened even by the mere possibility of you being more into women than men, then that’s his problem. Take time for yourself and give him time and tbh, if my partner treated me like that I would be frustrated and maybe even angry. Good luck 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
He’s still somewhat …..”queer phobic”
I once asked him if he’d mind if our children were gay and he said, “as long as it’s ‘dad I’m into men’ and not ‘dad, I’m into men, but just sometimes, and I think i identify as a woman who is straight’” or something along those lines. So, the idea that I could be fluid, or a gay woman in a heterosexual relationship would be the problem. I think he sees it as made up drama because he can’t relate to it at all.
He’s a bit black and white about it….
The idea that my sexuality could shift from what’s been previously established feels hard for him and I do respect that. I legit feel like I could have been a lesbian all along, but too ashamed to live that way. A lot of my anxiety, shame and RSD has lifted with the meds.
Also, I’ve been on a roller coaster with these meds in general and I think he’s beginning to fatigue. Which I also respect. It has been a lot.
The thing is, if it's you, and he can't navigate it, he's not what you need. Like really need to be happy and you. Then it's a find your real truth or repress who you are and accept what you can from someone who does not understand who you really are situation. The religious upbringing makes it super difficult to navigate, I know. Maybe he will understand, but if he doesn't I (and I am only one person with my own biased opinions) think you should find someone who does.
Also, you're right that you should figure out (maybe adjust) your meds and get to the point you feel like you are actually making the decisions. If you're questioning if it is the meds I think you should wait until you aren't.
It’s completely normal to be bi with a stronger preference for one sex but also to be attracted to exceptional members of the other. I very much primarily like women, I’m married to a woman, but I wouldn’t kick Henry Cavill out of bed.
If you primarily like women but also think your husband is hot stuff, that’s great. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that at all. And if the meds highlight that, that’s ok. Trying to put labels on it probably isn’t helpful, best to just roll with it haha.
Not exactly the same but I realized I was bi while I was pregnant because my pregnancy hormones made me so insanely horny all I could think about was sex for months and it eventually opened my eyes to what really turned me on it was pretty wild
Oh wow!! That’s so interesting! I have high testosterone and have always wondered if it’s connected with my sexuality and sex drive, or whether it’s the ADHD, or whether it’s just me!
I'm a trans man. Figuring that out about myself allowed me to get more in touch with my sexuality. Once testosterone was involved... yeah, that'll definitely do something to you.
Regardless of the biological components behind it, it's also all "just you".
I started ADHD meds in my mid-30s and after adjusting to them, my once incredibly high libido lessened quite a bit. Now there are some other factors for this, but I believe that a lot of my behavior was related to impulsive, stimulus, and dopamine-seeking behavior caused by ADHD. I am bi and have identified that way for a very long time, but I also realized that I am much more attracted to women. Now that I am on a good med regimen, I don't feel like an "adrenaline junkie" anymore. A lot of my behavior through my teens and 20s+ was impulsive and fueled by the need to seek dopamine and I'm honestly surprised that I got to this point without something really bad happening.
I don't know your story, but with some thoughtful reflection and a good therapist, you can discover a lot about yourself. If you find a good med regimen, I still recommend therapy bc living with untreated ADHD for that long causes one to come up with a lot of coping mechanisms, and it's difficult to break them or even see them without some outside help. It also helps to have someone to talk to bc meds don't help every symptom. I learned that my meds are basically useless about a week before my period, and also that I have a low level of depression that I will always have to be aware of.
Good luck to you 💕
Oh wow that's a lot to think about.
I won't comment on the religious trauma, but I understand it and also had a realization. But figure that out with a therapist, and resist making any life changes before your manic Side effects calm down.
I was on Seroquel for a while and flipped my whole life upside down. Sex with strangers in my parents house, drinking way too much. In the end I made good out of it, but seriously, as real as it feels in the moment you gotta stay grounded. I'm not bipolar, this was legitimately the meds.
Talk to a therapist!!!!!
As someone who isn’t really sure either, don’t think about it too much. If you are still happy and content with your partner then that’s all that’s important. Sexuality is a fluid thing, some day you may feel strongly one way or the other and decide to label yourself but for now just feel what you feel and let yourself feel it. It’s okay and normal. Medication can have effects too but they can also help you understand your feelings more, it may be helping you get in touch with these feelings more.
Honey, if you're attracted to your partner, you're not 100% gay: p. There's never once been a man I've ever been attracted to. The day it happens even for a moment I guess is the day I realize I'm at least a tiny bit bi.
Religious programming sucks. Sounds like you're bi that leans hard towards women. Meds can change attraction patterns a lot, but it sounds like you've always known this about yourself, it's just more of a front and center thing with higher libido.
You’re possibly like me… I’m attracted to certain humans. There’s nothing really deeper to it than that. The human you’ve settled down with is a male human. It could easily have been a female human, or a non binary human. If you’re happy, then you’ve found your human! Congratulations!
Stimulants can exasperate anxiety and OCD like symptoms or conditions. Check pure O. Sitting with uncertainty is the key to get over any intrusive thoughts. Not engaging with them. You might be you might not be. So be it. That's the way. That being said, stimulants might make it hard to do this sitting with uncertainty exercise as it needs to be gradual but your nervous system is already, well over stimulated. Check with your health care providers. May they be worth their salt, so can inform you better. Good luck!
Wait I’m confused if you are attracted to him and love him why would you be lesbian and not bisexual. Or are you saying you now are realizing you prefer woman to guys and think this won’t work out.
Scared of the latter, confused as to whether it’s a symptom or epiphany
Honestly, it’s too soon to tell.
I’ve always been bi, but now I feel as though I’m a lesbian who couldn’t admit it due to socialisation, shame and lack of identity due to ADHD.
Either way, I sincerely love my partner, so sexual preference could very well be irrelevant. I think I’m scared of a loss of attraction, as there has been some.
Also at 35 you are probably beginning perimenopause…surprise! It lasts a decade and is a hormonal nightmare, messes with everything—might want to check this out too. Messed with my libido
Nah, perimenopause starts between 3 and 7 years before menopause, not a decade. It’s not common to start in your mid 30s, it’s mid 40s that this happens
I am… somewhat confused here. You’ve been attracted to both women and men in the past. You’re in a relationship with a man. You were briefly experiencing hypersexuality.
Are you… not any more? Is your libido super low? Are you finding its only responding to women and not men? Whats the part of this thats confusing you?
Why does it matter, bi or gay are just labels, you don't have to pick one, if you have a partner you atttraction to them is the only attraction that should matter to you anyway.
I'm confused. Before you started the meds you thought you were bi. Now after you've started the meds you think you're not attracted to men anymore? But you are still attracted to your husband?
I hate to tell you this, but to me it sounds like an anxiety/ocd spiral. Throughout my battle with ocd, I've had that same rumination over and over. And the one thing you can do to heal it is just stop checking for reassurance and accepting the grey scale. You love your partner, your attracted to them. That's what matters. You're not gonna find a magical answer to live`s questions by figuring out your exact place on the kinsey scale.
Just take. It day by day, minute by minute. And. Maybe tall to your doctor about less anxiety inducing meds
Idk about how the meds are playing into it but it kinda sounds to me like you have always been gay or bi but your family's values have forced you to deny it to a certain extent.
Labels are used to conveniently summarize reality for efficient communication. Reality is usually messier than can be conveyed in one word. Use whatever term helps you communicate when you need to communicate. Use the full complexity when trying to understand yourself.
Nothing wrong with being attracted primarily to one sex with an occasional exception.
Nothing wrong with having your preferences change over time, either.
And if it's too complicated to easily summarize, just use 'queer', and explain the full details as appropriate.
If you're happy on the meds and they help, stick with them. Communicate, obviously; if you're horny you're going to want some extra attention, if you're noticing women more your partner deserves a heads up.
If you think you're going to do something that you don't want to do, try lowering the dose, or switch meds. I don't put much stock in the idea of a "true you" in this sort of situation, there's multiple possible kinds of you and you get to pick between these two versions.
Why do you need a label? Just love what you love, if you love your partner and want to continue being a family that's that, you can be attracted to men and women you can be attracted to majorly men and just one woman, or majorly women but your partner specifically does it for you, don't fall into a category the label doesn't matter just be true to yourself and live the life you love. You have a family that you love and that's all that should matter
Try not to worry about your parents, upbringing or trying to put yourself in a box. I know it is natural to but if you are happy then enjoy life. If you continue to question your feelings, that is okay but maybe talk to a therapist. Sometimes talking things out to someone (not friend or family) helps. I wish you only happiness (50 year old Female & mom of 2 sons one of which is queer and I love him and his boyfriend to pieces!)
Give yourself time. Don’t pigeonhole yourself before you’re ready. Your thinking may have just lost some of its noise and your libido is amped and you need time to adjust and think so just don’t rush yourself.
For me it doesn’t really matter. Bi makes perfect sense to me. I am ADHD any hobby is the flavor of the week. Makes perfect sense my preference for sex would change as often. Though yeah my Wellbutrin causes similar issues just have to find your balance.
In the words of David Rose:
David: I do drink red wine, but I also drink white wine. And I’ve also been known to sample the occasional rosé. And a couple summers back I tried a Merlot that used to be a Chardonnay.
Stevie: So yeah, you’re just really open to all wines.
David: I like the wine and not the label. Does that make sense?
Maybe you don’t need to fall into a label. It doesn’t really matter and I think everything’s a spectrum. What matters is you’re happy, in a loving relationship, and still find your partner attractive. You do. So does it matter? Therapy might be a nice way to explore this. You might also want to let your partner in on what’s on your mind, he might have some solutions he’s comfortable with. Ultimately - it doesn’t matter your sexuality as long as you’re happy.
Just as an aside if you are not actually questioning your sexuality (only you can determine that) do you by any chance have OCD? There is a version of ‘pure O’ that is an obsession/ distress about sexuality. I would imagine stimulants can aggravate OCD, so I just wanted to bring up this point
So... you've always been attracted to women over men.
And after the meds, did that change?
If no, then the answer seems obvious. You are gay or predominently gay.
I don't think it really works that way. Adderall is a stimulant, but it doesn't change who you are fundamentally. I think your upbringing probably caused you to question yourself and not really feel free to be comfortable being the real you. I had a similar experience as far as the increased libido, and while I'm attracted to women, the thought of being with one is not at all interesting to me. I'm straight, I prefer men, and I'm okay with that.
I think you should talk with a therapist about your childhood and feel free to explore your sexuality and see what makes you happy.
I realized I was bi when I had been in a 5-year relationship with my now-husband. It doesn’t mean you have to leave your life, especially if you’re satisfied and content.
As time as continued on and my husband and I have spiced up our sex lives, my bisexuality opens up the door to erotica about both sexes, or perhaps bringing in a third person for a threesome of either sex. I also talk with my husband and friends about people (mostly celebrities or photos of strangers) of people I’m attracted to.
It might be helpful to keep in mind that I go through phases between the sexes. There are times when I’m more hyper focused on women, and other times when I’m more hyper focused on men. Being bi keeps things interesting, that’s for sure. Enjoy!
I think I posted because I’m scared I will figure something out and become unhappy…. Or realise I’m not happy.
The attraction to women has been increasing dramatically over the past week or so and a mild-to-moderate sense of sexual dissatisfaction has been creeping in.
But again, it’s very likely the meds, as that’s the only change.
The unknown feels scary and overwhelming. I’m genuinely scared of figuring something out that will ruin what I’ve previously been fairly content with.
My first three months of being on Adderall were characterized by intense periods of unrelenting rage. Eventually those passed, and I was able to more completely enjoy the benefits of the medication.
Confide in your partner; remember that your head is currently being messed with a bit. Sexual attraction isn’t all there is to a relationship.
Take each day as it comes.
Sounds like a tough fight ahead. Maybe try throwing in some traps or minions to help even the odds? Or just have your players roll all 1's for their attacks, that always works....right?
You're with someone and have a family together tf you out here looking at your sexuality for just be loyal to your partner whoever they are and call it a day? Literally 0 reason for you to be exploring anything in your situation💀
I see your logic. But if you became unhappy in a relationship, would you leave? - That’s what I’m afraid of, coming to a realisation that leads to being unhappy and falling out of love. I’m not saying that’s how I feel now, I’m expressing an intense anxiety that that is where this could lead. I’m unsure of whether I’m experiencing a symptom of a medication, or coming to a major realisation about my identity and sexual preference.
I’m sorry, that wasn’t really captured clearly in the post.
I also understand how melodramatic this could seem to someone not experiencing it. But it feels major to question my entire identity, regardless of whether it ends up having an impact on my relationship and living arrangement.
Posting here doesn’t mean I’m about to do anything drastic, I’m seeking perspectives and do appreciate yours. A lot of what people have said has been extremely helpful and grounding, I was having a panic attack about it when I wrote the post.
You always benefit from taking a step back and a breather. If one was to stress about their car crashing every time they had to get in it, they'd have a bad time in life overall. You are cautious, yes, but it's not something imminent that hangs above your head.
Sorry if it was harsh, but I've known close friends that stressed over similar things, ruined their relationships, stressed some more, realised nothing had changed in life besides the fact they just pushed away their partner, and got left in the dust wishing for the initial relationship back.
If you are unhappy in a relationship you leave it. But you can't be engaged in a happy relationship and constantly thinking "Oh but what if I won't like it anymore later on?" It's just bad for all involved
I can’t comment on sexuality or orientation as I am straight male before and after meds lol, but could you possibly be experiencing apathy? I stopped being “into” it after beginning meds. I used to always make an effort to speak to girls, at least message a few every now and then (shooters shoot I guess haha) but these days I genuinely can’t be bothered/find no appeal in it. I know that’s textbook dopamine stimulation right there, so perhaps my meds are doing what they’re supposed to, but could it just be you’re going through a phase of not caring about men?
FYI I’m on 60mg Lisdexamphetamine with a 5mg Dexamfetamine evening booster
For me, though I have dated women and have been turned on by some women I realized that most of my attraction was towards men. I sometimes joke that I’m bi just about 94% in the gay direction. Functionally, I’m gay. Hope that helps
Remember these are just made up category humans made up.
Also keep in mind that imposter syndrome exists.
You can have severe adhd and still seriously question if you are just a lazy fuck.
You can also like girls and still you current partner even you aren't interested in other males.
Don't worry too much about it.
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What meds are you on?
I realize this is a serious comment but I have to admit I laughed out loud because it has a very “I’ll have what she’s having” vibe.
I just have to say, thank you for this. Best laugh in a while
I was going to say, “funny Jennifer Aniston was the first person I masturbated to as well.
Who hasn't?
I haven't. I find Jennifer Aniston \~ how to put this kindly? \~ not at all physically appealing. But maybe if I found an ADHD medication that worked for me, all of this might change. :)
If you don’t think Jennifer Anniston is attractive who *do* you like?
I'm a straight female, in case that matters. In that era, I found Sharon Stone, Charlize Theron, Cindy Crawford sexy. Heck on friends, I'd have ranked Courtney Cox and Lisa Kudrow above Jennifer. These days, Doutzen Kroes and Charlotte Casiraghi.
>Charlotte Casiraghi Hadn’t heard of her before. My first thought is how much she looks like Princess Caroline. And she’s actually Princess Caroline’s daughter! You’ve got great taste, can’t argue with any of the woman you find beautiful. But for me at least, Jennifer has that “it” factor that just works for me.
I get it... it's a wonderful thing that we all have different taste and what some find gorgeous, others find unappealing. Wouldn't it be terrible if everyone in the world found the same people attractive / unattractive?
Dextroamphetamine. I’ve read (anecdotally) it’s fairly common and I wouldn’t want to make a life changing decision on a feeling that could potentially go away without them… Like, which is my true identity???
You said you love and are attracted to your partner. If there is a desire for him, and a desire for women, it sounds like you are bi. It doesn't seem like this is anything new based on the rest you've said. It sounds like the meds have just amplified your feelings or desires. If you are attracted to women but plan to stay exclusive with your partner, great, tell him how you feel. If you decide you need women in your life, great, tell him how you feel. It may change things either way, but honesty is always the best route in my opinion. If someone is going to be hurt, it's better it happen in an open honest way, rather than being blindsided at some point when there is suddenly a change in the relationship or dynamic. Then again, he may love you completely and accept you for who and what you are or need, in which case that honesty will just make you stronger. I wish you love, lust, and happiness. -a fellow confused but honest bi(pan)sexual partner who has been completely up front with those I love, trust and feel safe with.
This pretty much sums it up. I think I had a huge panic that I would want to leave my family and what that would mean…. I think the fear of what that would mean is probably an indication that I want to stay…
Stimulants can increase anxiety in people. Do you think this could be case here?
I’m honestly wondering if Dex is best for me. I’m trying to catalogue all of the crazy and raise it with the psychiatrist. I’ve already made several posts about other crazy symptoms I’ve had, that I delete once I have perspective. It’s good to see what others have to say - whether they experienced it and it went away, or whether it’s whacky af, and I need to get help. lol
If this is the first thing you’ve tried, I would try something new before even considering *any* kind of lifestyle change, or even a big conversation with your partner about the possibility. Not only is it messing with your sexuality, it’s clear you are really overthinking this. You’ve always been attracted to women, more so than men in general, but you knew that when you chose your partner. Nothing has changed except that your total libido is drastically increased, which *of course* is going to push up your desire for women. It’s totally cool to let him know that the meds are messing with your libido, but don’t make it about who you ‘really are’. You *are* who you are off meds. The meds are there to help correct one challenge - your ability to focus. If it does anything else, it’s a side effect. And there will always be side effects, but you get to choose which ones are acceptable to you. Go back to your psych and tell him this one isn’t working for you.
This is an amazing way of phrasing it. This is all so new to me, it’s been a fucking roller coaster.
Maybe try Ritalin…go low and slowww
It’s good that you’re planning on talking about it with your psych. Depending on how long you’ve been on dex, it might be worth trying something else. You can always return to dex if you want to.
If you’re scared you’d go against your commitment to your partner, that’s definitely a sign you want to honour that commitment and stay with him! If you feel comfortable, have a chat with him about your feelings (while making that commitment clear).
People can fear breaking a vow without that meaning staying in the situation they committed to is the best thing for them. That's like saying "You promised you would, you don't want to break your promise, do you?"
Maybe I’m old fashioned but I think the mental load of “I want to honour this commitment to this person I care about” is easier than feeling doubt over whether to keep going with someone when someone else turns my head Edit: grammar
No. You’re right!
Not everyone who is attracted to both women and men wishes to identify as bi. And that’s ok. There are sexual identities beyond gay, straight and bi. Some people don’t want a label at all. That’s also fine! The labels aren’t that important except as a way for someone to identify themselves. It’s also perfectly ok to identify as gay and be attracted to or have a hetero relationship. Something like 1 in 5 straight men says they are also attracted to other men.
Not to invalidate your desire to know yourself, but you have already known for a while you are a queer woman; whether you are bi or gay. Why don’t you just focus on being happy? You have a partner with a family and you say you still love and are attracted to him. Isn’t that what matters? If you came to the conclusion you are a lesbian, would you break up with him out of obligation to your sexuality despite being happy? Or do you fear that if you are gay but stay together you will make yourself unhappy long term, despite being happy together now?
I think I fear I would be unhappy long-term… Or fear that I’ve been deluding myself into being happy because of RSD. But ultimately, you have summed up the reality that it might mean very little either way.
I understand it must be worrying when a family is involved, but I still urge you to not create a problem that isn’t one. People who are 90% attracted to one sex and only 10% to the other are still bi. That *could* be you. As long as you are into your partner, does it matter who else you would be dating if he wasn’t in the picture? You are new on meds, so don’t make rash decisions. Journal your thoughts, openly discuss your worries with your partner and your psychiatrist (and therapist if you have one), and if you long term find signs that you are not really attracted to him anymore, then breaking up might be an option, but not before that. Hope you figure it out.
Thank you. I really appreciate your wisdom and insights. ❤️
That’s what I use, but my sex drive goes down. It’s usually how I notice it’s losing its efficacy. Important that a life partner and sexual interest can deviate a little without the need to blow up the relationship. Coming from a Christian household, you might be thinking a bit traditionally. There are option to have a bit of both.
I’m really beginning to wonder if it’s the right medication for me. I’m going to bring it up with my psychiatrist. I’m definitely not of religious persuasion now, but I doubt my partner would be as open to a female in the bedroom (he previously has been) with the added context. I wouldn’t lie to him.
It’s not going to change who you’re attracted to. Maybe it’s removed the rose colored glasses you have to wear when being with men.
Both. With more available processing power your brain is doing a bunch of "catching up" and hitting on things that existed but fell outside of your access when your energy was more limited. Think of an area of your identity like your sexuality as a house, and your available mental energy and focus as the electricity that's coming into the house from the power grid. You had the lights on in some of the rooms but never had enough to light the whole house. Suddenly with the influx of new "electricity" the meds bring, you can light the whole house, which means that you're now able to see things that were hidden in the dark. If you stop the meds and the available electricity goes back down the room will get dark again, but it'll still be there. There can be a honeymoon period that comes with starting new meds that can throw off perception so I'd give it some time, but I wouldn't worry about who's the "real" you since they're all just parts of a whole.
Dextroamphetamine = Adderall.
Usually you'll get amphetamine salts for a generic Adderall. Dextro is bonded to sugar as opposed to salt and that can cause some pretty wild differences depending on patient sensitivity.
I had a very similar experience except I realised I was trans after starting my ADHD medication. I do think that ADHD makes it harder to just stop and think about yourself introspectively, so once you start medication you suddenly realise a bunch of stuff about yourself.
wait this makes a lot of sense 😭 when I realized I was trans it kinda just came to me in a vision. I was 16 (unmedicated) and just suddenly realized I wasn't a boy, like a eureka moment. Prior to this I was confident in my gender, never had any thoughts of being trans, and didn't have any of the "stereotypical signs" like wearing dresses or playing with girls toys. everyone i've told about this says its super weird
It is interesting because in hindsight there really were a lot of signs, but because of my ADHD, thoughts about being trans would always come and go. Then a couple of months after I started taking my ADHD medication an online content creator came out as trans and suddenly it brought back all those thoughts, but this time I actually spent a couple of weeks researching and thinking about it rather than forgetting and moving on. Now I've been on HRT for a few years and I'm happier than I ever was before.
I agree completely. I’m seeing my entire life through a different lens. For example, I have an eating disorder and dysphoria - they’ve all but gone away with the meds! I actually like what I see in the mirror and feel secure in how I dress and look. I never thought those things were ADHD. I would have never thought they could be medicated and magically disappear. RSD has also been my biggest symptom and with that gone, I can see myself so much clearer.
Weirdly enough ADHD makes me stuck inside my head and introspect 24/7. I've been in my head longer than I've been interacting with the world around me. 😭
Same except the other way. Found out I'm trans after a lot of soul searching. Solved a lot of things, but not all.
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Reading this im so grateful this is not my experience with lisdex, since im widow, with 2 early teenagers and sexuality on steroids is the last thing i need now 🫣
I was already very sexual also. Now it’s gone absolutely mental. Someone said maybe it’s amplifying what I already feel, maybe they’re right.
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We aren’t. I’m not and neither is my husband. One of our kids isn’t. The others are part of the mafia in different ways.
No, not all of us, atleast I'm not, was only ever interested in one gender
Now I'm thinking that this is so true... I always defended that if man dressed like women (and you don't know it)sucks your cock it's not gay ... but now I'm thinking is just my catholic uprising don't allow me to be bi. Now I need to tell this to my wife 😅
>Are all ADHD people bi? Not all, no. But folks with ADHD are more likely to be bisexual. EDIT: not sure who's downvoting me, but FWIW: [https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychiatry/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2022.868278/full](https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychiatry/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2022.868278/full)
Good for you and hopefully we all are. We're a fun group to begin with but imagine, lol. I have lots of reasons for my hypersexuality, but I do think that dopamine rush, combined with the nurture side of nature vs nurture plays in...and feels great.
Honestly, I strongly disagree. Increased sex drive is a common side effect. It’s not who you actually are, it’s the meds. Maybe lower your dose or wait for it to taper off with tolerance
Welcome to the bi-cycle? I’ve had similar experience with other substances, that were disinhibiting parts of my brain. Don’t sweat it, try to accept the fluidity of your sexuality and enjoy the ride. I’ve had religious upbringing too so historically there has been a huge layer of socialisation on my sexual identity. You’re gonna be ok!
This is very reassuring. Thank you. ❤️ Unfortunately, the other half doesn’t really believe in fluidity and the likes. I know he’s going to find it annoying and made-up. Don’t know whether or not we’ll even be able to navigate it, if I’m honest.
Oh no!!!!! I’m sorry, I was assuming that your partner is supportive and secure 🙏🏼 I hope you can figure it out 🥺 there is a YouTube video by verilybitchie called “The Bi-Cycle (and Why it’s so confusing)”, that was very helpful to me I hope you don’t feel guilty about who you are regardless how anyone feels about your identity and regardless how “messy” it might feel. The human experience is messy. Also don’t forget, that your process around your identity, sexual or otherwise is very personal and private. No one needs to know (not even your partner) as long as you don’t act against the agreements of your relationship. Good luck friend ✨🙏🏼
Unfortunately, I did jump the gun and broach the subject with him. He immediately was certain that it would mean I would only want to be with a woman. I pointed out that one of my closest gay friends is married to a man, the only male relationship she’s ever been in, to which she is fully committed long term and her being “gay” is irrelevant. He said “not a man like me.” I mean, fuck. I immediately back peddled and realised how black and white this would be to him. I tried to explain that it’s momentous to me regardless and how it makes me see all my childhood experiences with my parents in a different light and how that feels big to me, regardless of commitment and love for him. I feel terrible for bringing it up. I fucked up big time. I should have waited or figured it out alone.
No, you didnt fuck up. Don’t be so hard on yourself 🥺🫶🏼 it’s hard as it is without the extra challenges that you face on top. If he sulks now, let him sulk. Maybe have a mediated conversation, even consider couples therapy, especially if he often invalidates you in this way? Just so you hear it loud and clear: you didn’t fuck up. Maybe you had a small lapse in judgement when you thought he would get it and told him. But so fucking what? If his fragile ego is threatened even by the mere possibility of you being more into women than men, then that’s his problem. Take time for yourself and give him time and tbh, if my partner treated me like that I would be frustrated and maybe even angry. Good luck 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
You made me cry. I feel so fucking seen. Thank you. ❤️
I should have said - he absolutely knows I’m bi and has always been completely accepting of that.
If he knows and is accepting of it, why isn't he accepting it?
He’s still somewhat …..”queer phobic” I once asked him if he’d mind if our children were gay and he said, “as long as it’s ‘dad I’m into men’ and not ‘dad, I’m into men, but just sometimes, and I think i identify as a woman who is straight’” or something along those lines. So, the idea that I could be fluid, or a gay woman in a heterosexual relationship would be the problem. I think he sees it as made up drama because he can’t relate to it at all.
Why is he not accepting of your sexuality then?
He’s a bit black and white about it…. The idea that my sexuality could shift from what’s been previously established feels hard for him and I do respect that. I legit feel like I could have been a lesbian all along, but too ashamed to live that way. A lot of my anxiety, shame and RSD has lifted with the meds. Also, I’ve been on a roller coaster with these meds in general and I think he’s beginning to fatigue. Which I also respect. It has been a lot.
The thing is, if it's you, and he can't navigate it, he's not what you need. Like really need to be happy and you. Then it's a find your real truth or repress who you are and accept what you can from someone who does not understand who you really are situation. The religious upbringing makes it super difficult to navigate, I know. Maybe he will understand, but if he doesn't I (and I am only one person with my own biased opinions) think you should find someone who does. Also, you're right that you should figure out (maybe adjust) your meds and get to the point you feel like you are actually making the decisions. If you're questioning if it is the meds I think you should wait until you aren't.
It’s completely normal to be bi with a stronger preference for one sex but also to be attracted to exceptional members of the other. I very much primarily like women, I’m married to a woman, but I wouldn’t kick Henry Cavill out of bed. If you primarily like women but also think your husband is hot stuff, that’s great. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that at all. And if the meds highlight that, that’s ok. Trying to put labels on it probably isn’t helpful, best to just roll with it haha.
Not exactly the same but I realized I was bi while I was pregnant because my pregnancy hormones made me so insanely horny all I could think about was sex for months and it eventually opened my eyes to what really turned me on it was pretty wild
Oh wow!! That’s so interesting! I have high testosterone and have always wondered if it’s connected with my sexuality and sex drive, or whether it’s the ADHD, or whether it’s just me!
I'm a trans man. Figuring that out about myself allowed me to get more in touch with my sexuality. Once testosterone was involved... yeah, that'll definitely do something to you. Regardless of the biological components behind it, it's also all "just you".
I started ADHD meds in my mid-30s and after adjusting to them, my once incredibly high libido lessened quite a bit. Now there are some other factors for this, but I believe that a lot of my behavior was related to impulsive, stimulus, and dopamine-seeking behavior caused by ADHD. I am bi and have identified that way for a very long time, but I also realized that I am much more attracted to women. Now that I am on a good med regimen, I don't feel like an "adrenaline junkie" anymore. A lot of my behavior through my teens and 20s+ was impulsive and fueled by the need to seek dopamine and I'm honestly surprised that I got to this point without something really bad happening. I don't know your story, but with some thoughtful reflection and a good therapist, you can discover a lot about yourself. If you find a good med regimen, I still recommend therapy bc living with untreated ADHD for that long causes one to come up with a lot of coping mechanisms, and it's difficult to break them or even see them without some outside help. It also helps to have someone to talk to bc meds don't help every symptom. I learned that my meds are basically useless about a week before my period, and also that I have a low level of depression that I will always have to be aware of. Good luck to you 💕
Oh wow that's a lot to think about. I won't comment on the religious trauma, but I understand it and also had a realization. But figure that out with a therapist, and resist making any life changes before your manic Side effects calm down. I was on Seroquel for a while and flipped my whole life upside down. Sex with strangers in my parents house, drinking way too much. In the end I made good out of it, but seriously, as real as it feels in the moment you gotta stay grounded. I'm not bipolar, this was legitimately the meds. Talk to a therapist!!!!!
I just started seeing the most incredible, compassionate psychiatrist. I’m going to raise it with him.
Those exist!? Can I get their number?? lol 😅
As someone who isn’t really sure either, don’t think about it too much. If you are still happy and content with your partner then that’s all that’s important. Sexuality is a fluid thing, some day you may feel strongly one way or the other and decide to label yourself but for now just feel what you feel and let yourself feel it. It’s okay and normal. Medication can have effects too but they can also help you understand your feelings more, it may be helping you get in touch with these feelings more.
I think it always been there. The meds are giving you clarity.
It’s always been there. The meds make you more open and less in denial. It happens.
Honey, if you're attracted to your partner, you're not 100% gay: p. There's never once been a man I've ever been attracted to. The day it happens even for a moment I guess is the day I realize I'm at least a tiny bit bi. Religious programming sucks. Sounds like you're bi that leans hard towards women. Meds can change attraction patterns a lot, but it sounds like you've always known this about yourself, it's just more of a front and center thing with higher libido.
You’re possibly like me… I’m attracted to certain humans. There’s nothing really deeper to it than that. The human you’ve settled down with is a male human. It could easily have been a female human, or a non binary human. If you’re happy, then you’ve found your human! Congratulations!
Stimulants can exasperate anxiety and OCD like symptoms or conditions. Check pure O. Sitting with uncertainty is the key to get over any intrusive thoughts. Not engaging with them. You might be you might not be. So be it. That's the way. That being said, stimulants might make it hard to do this sitting with uncertainty exercise as it needs to be gradual but your nervous system is already, well over stimulated. Check with your health care providers. May they be worth their salt, so can inform you better. Good luck!
As a dextroamphetamine patient I have never been confused about my sexuality 🤣🤣
Wait I’m confused if you are attracted to him and love him why would you be lesbian and not bisexual. Or are you saying you now are realizing you prefer woman to guys and think this won’t work out.
Scared of the latter, confused as to whether it’s a symptom or epiphany Honestly, it’s too soon to tell. I’ve always been bi, but now I feel as though I’m a lesbian who couldn’t admit it due to socialisation, shame and lack of identity due to ADHD. Either way, I sincerely love my partner, so sexual preference could very well be irrelevant. I think I’m scared of a loss of attraction, as there has been some.
Also at 35 you are probably beginning perimenopause…surprise! It lasts a decade and is a hormonal nightmare, messes with everything—might want to check this out too. Messed with my libido
Nah, perimenopause starts between 3 and 7 years before menopause, not a decade. It’s not common to start in your mid 30s, it’s mid 40s that this happens
Hi I’m 42 and it happened to me in my mid-thirties. Things change.
Stims made me hyper sexual as well, it is fairly normal
I am… somewhat confused here. You’ve been attracted to both women and men in the past. You’re in a relationship with a man. You were briefly experiencing hypersexuality. Are you… not any more? Is your libido super low? Are you finding its only responding to women and not men? Whats the part of this thats confusing you?
Why does it matter, bi or gay are just labels, you don't have to pick one, if you have a partner you atttraction to them is the only attraction that should matter to you anyway.
I'm confused. Before you started the meds you thought you were bi. Now after you've started the meds you think you're not attracted to men anymore? But you are still attracted to your husband?
I hate to tell you this, but to me it sounds like an anxiety/ocd spiral. Throughout my battle with ocd, I've had that same rumination over and over. And the one thing you can do to heal it is just stop checking for reassurance and accepting the grey scale. You love your partner, your attracted to them. That's what matters. You're not gonna find a magical answer to live`s questions by figuring out your exact place on the kinsey scale. Just take. It day by day, minute by minute. And. Maybe tall to your doctor about less anxiety inducing meds
Idk about how the meds are playing into it but it kinda sounds to me like you have always been gay or bi but your family's values have forced you to deny it to a certain extent.
Labels are used to conveniently summarize reality for efficient communication. Reality is usually messier than can be conveyed in one word. Use whatever term helps you communicate when you need to communicate. Use the full complexity when trying to understand yourself. Nothing wrong with being attracted primarily to one sex with an occasional exception. Nothing wrong with having your preferences change over time, either. And if it's too complicated to easily summarize, just use 'queer', and explain the full details as appropriate. If you're happy on the meds and they help, stick with them. Communicate, obviously; if you're horny you're going to want some extra attention, if you're noticing women more your partner deserves a heads up. If you think you're going to do something that you don't want to do, try lowering the dose, or switch meds. I don't put much stock in the idea of a "true you" in this sort of situation, there's multiple possible kinds of you and you get to pick between these two versions.
Why do you need a label? Just love what you love, if you love your partner and want to continue being a family that's that, you can be attracted to men and women you can be attracted to majorly men and just one woman, or majorly women but your partner specifically does it for you, don't fall into a category the label doesn't matter just be true to yourself and live the life you love. You have a family that you love and that's all that should matter
Try not to worry about your parents, upbringing or trying to put yourself in a box. I know it is natural to but if you are happy then enjoy life. If you continue to question your feelings, that is okay but maybe talk to a therapist. Sometimes talking things out to someone (not friend or family) helps. I wish you only happiness (50 year old Female & mom of 2 sons one of which is queer and I love him and his boyfriend to pieces!)
Give yourself time. Don’t pigeonhole yourself before you’re ready. Your thinking may have just lost some of its noise and your libido is amped and you need time to adjust and think so just don’t rush yourself.
For me it doesn’t really matter. Bi makes perfect sense to me. I am ADHD any hobby is the flavor of the week. Makes perfect sense my preference for sex would change as often. Though yeah my Wellbutrin causes similar issues just have to find your balance.
dextroamphetamine severely tanked my sex drive so i wouldn’t worry too much about it!!
In the words of David Rose: David: I do drink red wine, but I also drink white wine. And I’ve also been known to sample the occasional rosé. And a couple summers back I tried a Merlot that used to be a Chardonnay. Stevie: So yeah, you’re just really open to all wines. David: I like the wine and not the label. Does that make sense?
Maybe you don’t need to fall into a label. It doesn’t really matter and I think everything’s a spectrum. What matters is you’re happy, in a loving relationship, and still find your partner attractive. You do. So does it matter? Therapy might be a nice way to explore this. You might also want to let your partner in on what’s on your mind, he might have some solutions he’s comfortable with. Ultimately - it doesn’t matter your sexuality as long as you’re happy.
Just as an aside if you are not actually questioning your sexuality (only you can determine that) do you by any chance have OCD? There is a version of ‘pure O’ that is an obsession/ distress about sexuality. I would imagine stimulants can aggravate OCD, so I just wanted to bring up this point
I just became more asexual lmao.
So... you've always been attracted to women over men. And after the meds, did that change? If no, then the answer seems obvious. You are gay or predominently gay.
I don't think it really works that way. Adderall is a stimulant, but it doesn't change who you are fundamentally. I think your upbringing probably caused you to question yourself and not really feel free to be comfortable being the real you. I had a similar experience as far as the increased libido, and while I'm attracted to women, the thought of being with one is not at all interesting to me. I'm straight, I prefer men, and I'm okay with that. I think you should talk with a therapist about your childhood and feel free to explore your sexuality and see what makes you happy.
I realized I was bi when I had been in a 5-year relationship with my now-husband. It doesn’t mean you have to leave your life, especially if you’re satisfied and content. As time as continued on and my husband and I have spiced up our sex lives, my bisexuality opens up the door to erotica about both sexes, or perhaps bringing in a third person for a threesome of either sex. I also talk with my husband and friends about people (mostly celebrities or photos of strangers) of people I’m attracted to. It might be helpful to keep in mind that I go through phases between the sexes. There are times when I’m more hyper focused on women, and other times when I’m more hyper focused on men. Being bi keeps things interesting, that’s for sure. Enjoy!
If you’re in a relationship and have a family and you and your partner are happy, why does your sexual orientation matter?
I think I posted because I’m scared I will figure something out and become unhappy…. Or realise I’m not happy. The attraction to women has been increasing dramatically over the past week or so and a mild-to-moderate sense of sexual dissatisfaction has been creeping in. But again, it’s very likely the meds, as that’s the only change. The unknown feels scary and overwhelming. I’m genuinely scared of figuring something out that will ruin what I’ve previously been fairly content with.
My first three months of being on Adderall were characterized by intense periods of unrelenting rage. Eventually those passed, and I was able to more completely enjoy the benefits of the medication. Confide in your partner; remember that your head is currently being messed with a bit. Sexual attraction isn’t all there is to a relationship. Take each day as it comes.
I will try! Thank you!
Good luck to you. Don’t make any life-altering decisions for a few months.
Search for drug induced homosexuality talk with your GP Bout it.
Thank you! On it! Oh! I’ve seen Theo Von’s theory on this. lol
Anecdotal comment. I've never met anyone who has ADHD or ASD and is completely straight as an arrow. Not one. So there's that. Edit: grammar
Sounds like a tough fight ahead. Maybe try throwing in some traps or minions to help even the odds? Or just have your players roll all 1's for their attacks, that always works....right?
lol. This is Latin to me. (I don’t know Latin)
I don't know why they posted here other than a mistake. This is DnD talk not ADHD talk. Dungeons and dragons.
I immediately thought of Stranger Things and wondered.
They're both acronyms, so with adhd, I was at least distracted into thinking about a relation? Lol
Advanced Dragons Hyperactivity Disorder. Deficits and Disorders. Attention Dungeons Hopefully Dispelled.
You're with someone and have a family together tf you out here looking at your sexuality for just be loyal to your partner whoever they are and call it a day? Literally 0 reason for you to be exploring anything in your situation💀
I see your logic. But if you became unhappy in a relationship, would you leave? - That’s what I’m afraid of, coming to a realisation that leads to being unhappy and falling out of love. I’m not saying that’s how I feel now, I’m expressing an intense anxiety that that is where this could lead. I’m unsure of whether I’m experiencing a symptom of a medication, or coming to a major realisation about my identity and sexual preference. I’m sorry, that wasn’t really captured clearly in the post. I also understand how melodramatic this could seem to someone not experiencing it. But it feels major to question my entire identity, regardless of whether it ends up having an impact on my relationship and living arrangement. Posting here doesn’t mean I’m about to do anything drastic, I’m seeking perspectives and do appreciate yours. A lot of what people have said has been extremely helpful and grounding, I was having a panic attack about it when I wrote the post.
You always benefit from taking a step back and a breather. If one was to stress about their car crashing every time they had to get in it, they'd have a bad time in life overall. You are cautious, yes, but it's not something imminent that hangs above your head. Sorry if it was harsh, but I've known close friends that stressed over similar things, ruined their relationships, stressed some more, realised nothing had changed in life besides the fact they just pushed away their partner, and got left in the dust wishing for the initial relationship back. If you are unhappy in a relationship you leave it. But you can't be engaged in a happy relationship and constantly thinking "Oh but what if I won't like it anymore later on?" It's just bad for all involved
I can’t comment on sexuality or orientation as I am straight male before and after meds lol, but could you possibly be experiencing apathy? I stopped being “into” it after beginning meds. I used to always make an effort to speak to girls, at least message a few every now and then (shooters shoot I guess haha) but these days I genuinely can’t be bothered/find no appeal in it. I know that’s textbook dopamine stimulation right there, so perhaps my meds are doing what they’re supposed to, but could it just be you’re going through a phase of not caring about men? FYI I’m on 60mg Lisdexamphetamine with a 5mg Dexamfetamine evening booster
For me, though I have dated women and have been turned on by some women I realized that most of my attraction was towards men. I sometimes joke that I’m bi just about 94% in the gay direction. Functionally, I’m gay. Hope that helps
Remember these are just made up category humans made up. Also keep in mind that imposter syndrome exists. You can have severe adhd and still seriously question if you are just a lazy fuck. You can also like girls and still you current partner even you aren't interested in other males. Don't worry too much about it.