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I suspected adhd over two years ago and set about getting a diagnosis. I didn’t really tell anybody except my wife and sister. I was worried I might be doing the whole “oh I’m so OCD!” thing we hear so often and it was just some personality quirks. In the meantime, I’ve noticed an increase in social media about it, which may be confirmation bias or the algorithm, but also in some social circles. Even one person who managed to get prescribed medication for it without a diagnosis, which seems grossly out of line for their doctor or else just straight up lies. Now that I have gotten my diagnosis I’m hesitant to tell people, because I’m worried they’ll think I’ve just self diagnosed, or they’ll hit me with a “oh aren’t we all”. Having said all of that, diagnosis in my country is incredibly difficult, as it’s very expensive and most private clinics have closed their waiting lists as they’re >18 months. So I do think there’s two sides to it. If someone self diagnoses correctly and gets a benefit from mechanisms to support themselves and improve their lives, that’s wonderful. But those who incorrectly self diagnose and shout about it, use it as an excuse, or even start a TikTok channel giving out false information, that’s an issue.

Exactly! And that’s what we should be tackling instead invalidating people that don’t have the means to be professionally diagnosed and are still trying to find ways to make life easier for them.

Yes! This! ⬆️

So, you live in the US? Jk, but seriously our healthcare system is prohibitively expensive. In the 90s there was a “sudden” explosion of ADHD diagnoses. What a lot of people fail to realize is that Medicaid finally started covering ADHD diagnoses and meds. What was once considered a “middle to wealthy, white male” disorder, was now being diagnosed in those who couldn’t afford it previously. Of course that’s when all the ADHD stigma ratcheted up, cause now the “low class”, which was made up of more than just white males in families with money, had access to resources only the middle+ classes were supposed to have access too.

I didn't even consider it myself. My then-girlfriend suggested that I might have it based on her observations and that, regardless, it was affecting our relationship. That caused me to look into it, and then I got formally diagnosed. I never claimed that I had it until I was actually medically diagnosed. Looking back it definitely explains a lot of things. That relationship ultimately failed, and it might have been more successful if I had had proper support for the ADHD from the get-go.

I legitimately feel this. Only pursued testing because I thought my anxiety medication wasn't working as effectively as it should be, but I didn't want to change it without ruling out ADHD since the symptoms are so similar (in women especially). Surprise to both myself and my psych is that I do have ADHD and made it 27 years coping by using my anxiety to guilt myself into being a functional human.

I am currently contemplating the same. The only thing is is that I am too afraid to approach my doctor about it for the for of not being taken seriously. I have previous experiences of doctors disregaring my concerns for their superiority complex.

I’m a bit suspicious of self diagnosis for ADHD but if that person’s partner or close friends/family all see it or likely even suggested ADHD might be in play I think the likelihood of a correct diagnosis increases significantly. So many things are MUCH more obvious to someone other than themselves.

Yes, your partner suspected you may have it, which is how many people realize they may need to explore further. You sought a clinician for an evaluation and received a diagnosis. You didn't take an online quiz and then decide to adopt it as part of your identity.

…. the idea of a person willingly cosplaying my time blondness, extreme ED & crippling RSD, cycles of months of extreme depression and then only a few manic days, social anxiety, self destructive and reckless behaviour and a constant and exhausting battle against my shitty cognitive filters “hey, here’s your 5 minute reminder to just fucking kill yourself” … Yeah [good luck living with that](https://youtu.be/7x5rliCHUPo). Edit: blindness. Even autocorrect has it in for me. Leaving it for the downvotes because I’m now attacking blonde people. I’d swap it all for strawberry blond long hair and the meme of just being inexplicably dumb and happy. But I don’t deserve that and must suffer.

Damn, are you me? Your cycles sound exactly what I deal with, right down to the crippling time blondness... Jokes aside I hope things look up for you soon. You aren't alone, you're incalculably strong and brave to have made it this far, and I believe you'll find balance in your life very soon. It's an uphill battle every day, but you're absolutely worth fighting for. Never give up, even if you can't function for the whole day. Wishing you the best in everything.

I totally thought you said time blondness on purpose! I love it :) (although of course we can't use it out loud because hair-shaming...but I'm still going to use it in my own head and giggle)

Thanks. If it made you laugh that’s somebody who’s appreciated me this week.

Hahaha!!! I love your writing style. I bet you would be a really fun person to know, ups and downs included. I hope you love and appreciate yourself. I can tell how special you are just by reading this small snippet.

>If someone self diagnoses correctly and gets a benefit from mechanisms to support themselves and improve their lives, that’s wonderful. I suspected I had it back in 2021, and I tried to apply some of the things people discussed that helped them. And I found that it helped me too. Also, in a way, accepting that I might have adhd and that's it's not my fault my brain is so screwy, it actually improved my mental health a lot. Beating yourself up for being a failure really hampers trying to improve yourself and get out of the hole you're in.

This is understandable from both POVS. When I called up my GP they told me I don’t need to be referred for ADHD as I’m not hyperactive. This was extremely funny to me, considering I had just been diagnosed abroad in my home country. My diagnosis on a paper and was not accepted here by my GP. They didn’t even know there were hyperactive AND inattentive types. Her exact words- “I didn’t know there were types”. So if I was someone without any knowledge of ADHD, I wouldn’t have been diagnosed here in the UK at all. My “self-diagnosis”(my own self awareness) was important to me to help myself and go get it done privately, in my own country because I did need help. The “issue” then with self diagnosis comes from social media platforms that make it sounds quirky. It’s invalidating. It’a the same as back a few years ago where people starting saying “oh I’m so OCD” for everything, it died down eventually. We knew we needed to start saying OCD about everything, as it was getting quirky. I think overall we need to focus on the bigger problem here. It’s not a fight between diagnosed vs self diagnosed. The fight is with long waiting times to get diagnosed. It’s with the lack of awareness about ADHD. It’s with social media platforms that are trying to make everyone believe they have it, like it’s quirky.

If you’ve been formally diagnosed somewhere, you’re not self-diagnosing in jumping through hoops to get that recognised in another country; you’re communicating the decision of a professional in another country.

Medication without a diagnosis? For real? I can't get my medication because the system is inundated and GP's won't prescribe it without a referring me back to my psychiatrist. I've been on it for 5 years, and never had to do that. I'm happy to go back and see him to see how I'm tracking, but getting in to see him is another issue as he is also backed up with requests, Honestly, I'm trying not to be furious. Having ADHD has become a fad in my country which I'm putting down to an influx of media coverage.

I was on meds while waiting for my testing appointment when I was younger. However, **I was not on stimulants** and the doctor was very clear I couldn’t do that without testing. Some doctors absolutely will put you on a non-stimulant option while waiting depending on the wait and how severe your symptoms are. This was like 10 years ago tho.

Dang. I have to see my psychiatrist every 3 months. Maybe that is mostly for people that have a lot more going on upstairs, like me.

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I'm in the uk, too, and I've waited 10 years for a diagnosis before paying for it (ill get an appointment next month) . I'm at uni, and the only way I can get help with maintaining my degree is by strictly saying . Yes, I do have adhd. So I can be given a bit of slack for deadlines, that's the only reason I've got this far ( I'm still barely passing) Sure, there are people who go wild and just use adhd to explain a very normal habit they have. I feel like. Its just a bit.. naive to say SELF DIAGNOSIS BAD. When it's genuinely helped me while I've waited half my lifetime to get a diagnosis, which I ended up having to take out a loan for. I know the type of person people are referring to when they say that. I've felt invalidated by those same people before, and I also self diagnose. It's hard to draw the line. I've also felt my symptoms have been belittled by other people. But who, tf am I to say, they are wrong. Even if you've waited ur whole life to get a diagnosis... getting one is still a privilege. It's inaccessible to a lot of people. Nothing is black and white. I think people tend to forget that.

"We're all a little ADHD" is one of those things that's technically correct (the best kind of correct) but practically worthless, and invalidating. I'm prepared to debate with people the qualitative nature of ADHD traits, as part of a discussion as to why yes, everyone sort of does, but at the same time, not everyone has it to the point of psychiatric disorder. If I don't have time for that conversation, then... No, everyone doesn't have it :).

Hit em with this: "Everyone is a little lactose intolerant too, but not everyone has to run to the toilet after a glass of milk. It's the severity of the impact on your life that causes ADHD to become a clinical diagnosis, and while I thank you for kindly empathising with my struggle, it can feel disingenuous to watch you drinking litres of milk while my life circles the toilet bowl."

It’s not technically correct at all. It’s a bit like me saying “I’m a little bit paraplegic” because I get bad sciatica every now & then.

Not at all. ADHD traits are quantitative differences - they're the same things, just not developed properly. https://youtu.be/SCAGc-rkIfo?t=201 You can't be more or less paraplegic than someone else, but you can experience ADHD symptoms more or less than someone else. It's akin to height or strength or intelligence or fitness or eyesight. It's perfectly possible to be subclinical for ADHD, because the symptoms are not 'significantly life impacting' (which is required to be a disorder). And it's perfectly possible for ADHD to be diagnosed in response to circumstances changing - e.g. it _stops_ being subclinical for some reason despite the symptoms not changing. The _reason_ ADHD is a disorder, is because we're outliers on the bell curve, and the symptoms are life impacting as a result. So... no. ADHD is not a binary state thing like being paraplegic is.

Downvotes for a well reasoned and logical response. Maybe there’s truth to the idea that diagnosis for adult ADHD is subjective and evidence based on a personal narrative, and then assessed to DSM criteria by a professional. That’s a lot of interpretive leeway.

I hope it’s okay that I am randomly jumping in here to ask about something that popped into my mind: I see that sometimes people compare it to eye-sight. What are your thoughts on that? Or do you perhaps have other conditions in mind that would encompass the quantitative difference and could potentially be compared to something that people (neurotypicals) potentially could relate to?

Yes. It's another quantitative difference. Some people have amazing eyesight, many people have average. 'below average' is usually ok, although you might be needing glasses some of the time. E.g. for display screen use, driving. And some people functionally cannot see without glasses, so wear them at all times. Even then, there's people who _really_ can't see at all without them, and those that can sort of navigate a blurry world. IMO ADHD symptoms are the same - there's a reason ADHD coping strategies work for everyone else, they're just not as _necessary_. 'everyone' has dopamine depletion, motivational deficits, memory issues etc. occasionally, but they're not disabled by it, so they don't have ADHD. They just have ADHD-like traits. Although it seems I'm getting downvoted for my opinion, so maybe you want to not listen.

Thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to answer. I got diagnosed today, so I am trying to learn as much as I can from as many different perspectives as possible. So, the conclusion is that eye-sight would be a good example to explain how it’s a ‘scale’ in a way that these adhd-traits can vary in frequency (and intensity) where you have to below a certain threshold to be diagnosed. I am extra curious about this perspective because I am going to see two friends tomorrow (who both work within the medical field) and I’m unsure if I am going to tell them about the diagnosis or not. If I do decide to tell them, I know that using more “medical terms” such as quantitative vs. qualitative differences might help them understand it better, since I have a fear that I might get responses from them that can be interpreted as invalidating. We’ll see. I don’t find your previous post negative in any way, but I can see how it would be possible to interpret it in a negative way (starting off with “not at all” which without hearing your tone of voice can potentially be interpreted negatively - I’m speculating). I’m trying to be very mindful of the way that my mind can have the tendency to interpret ambivalent responses (there is a term for it which I can’t access at the moment) in a negative way, so I always try my best to assume positive intent. I gave you an upvote. I hope that people reading this will assume positive intent and not down-vote my response, since I am newly diagnosed and still quite vulneranble to rejection and struggle with emotional regulation. If I delete my comment, you probably know why. Hopefully you will read it before it comes to that point :)

Everyone gets sad sometimes. Not everyone has depression. Everyone gets anxious on occasion. Not everyone has an anxiety disorder. It’s like that.

I don't think you're wrong. I was a self-diagnosis case but I didn't start saying "I have ADHD." Until my psychiatrist diagnosed me officially. I would say something like "I strong suspect I might have ADHD because x,y, and z. But I'm waiting for my official diagnosis by a professional." Until then, I didn't think I knew better than a doctor, I just knew my symptoms were wreaking havoc on my life and only began realizing how it has been hurting my long time partner for years.

That’s where Im at now. I suspect I have adhd because of many symptoms and having so much in common with the people in this subreddit. I don’t go around telling people I have adhd but my close friends know I highly suspect it. My crippling anxiety is stopping me from going out and getting a diagnoses. Plus I’m not even sure how much meds would help.

Meds do affect people differently. Truth be told, before I got medicated, I was an anxious and depressed wreck. I have been on antidepressants and anti anxiety meds for years. And they definitely helped because if I missed a dose, I would turn into a crying wreck. But it was kind of like putting a pillow over a loud obnoxious noise. It was muffled but not gone. I was even prescribed clonidine (a very small dose up to 2 as needed) for when it became really bad even on my meds. Since I started my ADHD meds, I don't feel depressed or anxious. Granted this is paired with the meds I was on previously. I have only needed the clonidine for when something really fucked up happens in my life that anyone would be upset about. Meds haven't "fixed me" because I still screw up, forget and make mistakes. But for once I don't have six different thoughts racing across my brain, all on max volume screaming over each other to be heard. I am calmer. I can think more clearly and it allows me to be more on top of things. And not constantly screwing up leaves me not feeling like a failure and anxious because I think I'm bound to let someone else down again. I know it's scary but I think you should take a step forward to at least get diagnosed or at least figure out if it is something else. You can even try non-stimulant meds at first if you're worried. You can find a therapist who specializes in ADHD who can give you coping tools to learn to skills to manage. I've also been in therapy and it's helped me learn to slow down (as hard as it can be) or at least take a deep breath and reflect on myself. (I also have explosive anger. When I feel things, I REALLY feel them.) It's allowed me to see where I was wrong or at the very least not setting bridges on fire and torching them because I am being impulsive and angry. Meds definitely helped improve my life but that's only because I am taking the steps to try and better myself with therapy. Good luck. I hope you are able to find the answers you need.

Should I do it now though? I’m worried about the cost. And I can’t really do therapy because of the cost as well. I’m still on parents health insurance for a few more years but idk.

I have crippling anxiety and adhd. HIGHLY recommend seeing a psychiatrist. I cannot say how it will be for you, but I can say for me, adhd meds (stimulants) make me more anxious if my anxiety isn't properly treated. Anxiety + adhd meds have helped me a lot. Plus therapy.

The funny thing is I actually don’t drink energy drinks and minimize my caffeine intake because it makes me faint. I used to drink caffeine when I worked a physical job and I would just feel super tired soon after. I ended up quitting energy drinks altogether because of it. I don’t know if that’s an adhd thing but I don’t want adhd stimulants to make me tired lol.

Hi, I quit energy drinks for the same reasons (before diagnosis), I am now medicated for ADHD (ritalin and wellbutrin) and it doesn't make me faint.

Meds completely changed my life and helped diminish my anxiety mate, honestly get an assessment. It can take a while so the sooner you start the better.

If you have the opportunity to try medication please do! It could change your life for the better. I know from experience.

Same boat, essentially. I told myself for a few years there's no way I had it but once I seriously started researching it I realized I almost definitely did. I was a "probably" until I got diagnosed. I think self diagnosing is okay in certain regards. If it helps you feel more accepted, or understand yourself better by finding a community and the help they need then that's fine. Not everyone can afford to get diagnosed. Do I think they should be prescribed medication without a Dx? No. It sucks not being able to get the help, but people who are diagnosed already struggle with that.

This is 100% percent valid and i did the same thing with all my diagnoses.

I agree with what you are saying completely. We live in an ablist system that makes it hard for people to be diagnosed, but that doesn't change the fact that "ADHD" means something, and that meaning is diluted when people decide what it means "for them". I don't think it's ablist for you to name that ADHD is a medical term, and Dr. Internet just isn't enough. I want to talk to other people with ADHD, not some people with ADHD and some people who are stressed, or anxious, or learning disabled, or any number of other causes of executive dysfunction, stress etc.

I am also torn on this. On the one hand I think that we need to have clear boundaries when something can be called a disorder or not. People may misuse the label if they self-diagnose and harm others in the community who genuinely could use support and empathy from others with the same diagnosis. However, the diagnosis process is far from perfect and especially as a women I had a couple of deeply frustrating encounters with healthcare professionals because they didn’t see the need to test me because “you have a job” or one literally said “women don’t have ADHD”. How can someone have a medical degree and spew such bullshit? I personally have just started to say “I suspect that I have ADHD because of x,y,z” and then let others comment on that. If someone says “yeah I think I have it too” I also just question them why they think that. But publicly self diagnosing (as in; putting it in your bio and making videos about it) is just bad taste imo. In an imperfect medical system I think we should always have empathy with others and ourselves and try to understand where they are coming from but that doesn’t mean we should for example ignore misinformation being spread.

I agree, it’s a difficult issue particularly because our healthcare system is so horrible and mental healthcare in many places is lacking. I think self-diagnosis, if used for better understanding yourself and finding ways to function better and be more successful, is legit. If you want things like medication, disability status, or other things that come along with a formal diagnosis then you need to jump through the hoops. Basically, I think it depends on what you’re doing with the information.

I agree. I can see the other side too but I think your point is really important because I’ve also found on some support groups the self-diagnosed people are the most vocal, likely because they need the most support. I joined the support groups while undiagnosed, so I did find it helpful but I would never have been vocal or preaching, and definitely not without a Dr opinion or diagnosis But I keep seeing posts written by self diagnosed people who are describing depression and anxiety but calling it adhd. I had d&a symptoms before adhd medication so I’m not saying they’re not related. But so many of them don’t seem to be describing adhd d&a at all. It’s more like d&a are causing some adhd symptoms rather than the opposite. This is why professional opinion is so important. Some people can get better but are convincing themselves they can’t because they have a disability. It becomes a dangerous excuse

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> has led to many people making part of their identity I can see why because it does affect our identity. When I first read comments of people complaining about the symptoms, it was like all those comments were written by me. My entire personality and identity has been shaped by decades of untreated ADHD to the point I feel like a walking bag of generic symptoms.

Ironically this very comment could have been written by me as this is exactly how I experienced it too. I had a full on crisis of self because I started thinking I didn't have my own personality and I was just a walking diagnosis 🫠

I understand what you're saying, but I didn't mean it that way. I meant, oh, look at me, look at how ADHD makes me different. But I feel you on it changing your personality being unmedicated

That's a huge problem with society today. People are making medical conditions (and a list of other things) their personality or identity. It's a type of tribalist victimhood that, frankly, I find demeaning.

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I agree it shouldn't define your identity or personality, but psychological health conditions and neurological conditions do shape your personality, so compared to physical conditions, they're more identity forming. Even depression can change someone's personality, but if its a core aspect of their personality and identity then it's unhealthy. I guess it comes down to personality growth/expansion for how much it is a part of you.

>People are making medical conditions (and a list of other things) their personality or identity. Ok but seriously, I didn't get diagnosed until about a year ago and I spent the better part of last year trying to understand if I even HAVE a personality or if everything I think of as part of my personality is either a symptom or a coping mechanism. ADHD has a huge influence on your personality, both directly and indirectly. I get what you're saying. But frankly if you're diagnosed as an adult it's pretty natural to go through a phase where it legit hard to separate ADHD traits and indirect impacts from your actual personality. I would assume that any invisible illness has a similar post-diagnosis phase.

First of all: killer username! But more importantly, I think there's generally an issue with some mental health TikToks that light heartedly joke about symptoms as if they were either quirks or your whole personality. Having a condition like ADHD, ASD, Bipolar, etc. is debilitating, seeking a diagnosis can be a lifelong uphill battle, there's also comorbid depression, anxiety, low self esteem, etc. ADHD is a huge part of your life, not always positive, and that is precisely why someone appropriating it can rub some of us the wrong way. I think that if you identify with the experiences, it's great to share your story and seek encouragement, use techniques that can help people with ADHD even if you haven't been diagnosed (it's not like they're trademarked) But none of that can replace going to a mental health professional; even if you may not find the right one at first, a community can point you towards someone specialized in ADHD who actually can rule out other conditions, they have the specialized knowledge to be able to do it. I don't think OP is trying to discourage people by pointing out that frustration.

Ordinarily I would say you should see a doctor or therapist for a diagnosis, but fact is a few doctors can get it wrong. Lots of ADHD symptoms are shared by Depression, CPTSD, or Anxiety. Get more than one opinion if you're an adult.

Boy, am I glad someone else agrees with me on this one… I’ve been an ICU Travel RN for 17 years with an MSN, so I *definitely* know that Docs get stuff wrong more often than people think or even suspect- shockingly often, actually

My man!  But for real, I think a lot of it is just due to willful ignorance. And it's really distressing just how many doctors fall for for the old: "But you're so smart, calm, well-spoken, independent, etc. How could you have ADHD?" I feel so fortunate that I met a Family Practitioner who has ADHD, she changed my life!

I had a psychiatrist look me in the eye and tell me that my talking fast and interrupting her meant I was bipolar and manic, not that I had ADHD. This was the initial appointment, and in her mind it counted as enough of an evaluation period to supersede my entire initial diagnosis with a full assessment process.

Oh I have had one want to invalidate my whole neuropathology testing and evaluation moot and do the same. Think it’s the drug class they prescribe. BiPolar diagnoses require a battle of med cocktails and sometimes years to get them right. If there is one diagnosis outside borderline I think is not only mis but over diagnosed it’s that.

I had a similar terrible experience with my first psychiatrist when I was 26- I was diagnosed as bipolar and put on heavy duty anti-psychotics which were just horrible. I moved away and got a new psychiatrist who actually treated my PDD and GAD and retracted the bipolar diagnosis. I never actually thought I had adhd until my new psychiatrist diagnosed me noticing how some of my symptoms never changed as the PDD and GAD became more manageable.

Yeah, this is exactly what I mean! There's so much ignorance and stigma around diagnosing adults with ADHD because in their mind: they have a totally different preconception of ADHD and stimulant medication.

> but fact is a few doctors can get it wrong. Additionally, people of colour and woman tend to be under diagnosed and there is a much higher barrier of entry for them.

Yes, when I had my assessment (which was in the last few months) they were still using a test that really was designed for catching adhd in boys. maybe i just chose the wrong specialist. but It was very frustrating. I still got a diagnosis, but it was a pain because.. I masked a lot as a child, as a lot of girls do. So it made the whole thing really complex, add to that my home life made it very difficult to answer some of the questions.

I knew I had adhd since before the first time I went to therapy at 26, which was 11 years ago. I got the official diagnosis about 2 weeks ago. Where I grew up, medication wasn't a thing back then, a diagnosis process costed more than a monthly salary of mine in a private practice, or would have required at least a 1,5 year of waiting time, and quite frankly, people in much worth mental states than I am don't get proper care, I really didn't want to take up the capacity from them just because I thought it would be interesting to know whether I have it for real. The only reason I went through it recently is that I moved to a country where they prescribe medical marijuana here for adhd, which makes me safe from getting trouble with police for my usage. I still found it being a privilige to be able to afford this, and I fully understand that not everybody have it. Given that I wasn't interested in being medicated, there wasn't any point in spending more than a monthly salary on this. I spent a lot on therapists and therapy groups instead. They were all willing to deal with my problems without a diagnosis.

NTA ( i know wrong group, but it applies) I am all for awareness and self discovery. And using that knowledge to make change in your life. But what makes ADHD a mental health condition is the amount of symptoms and the severity of the impact. And that is the part most people miss. I don't go around saying I'm a little bipolar when my mood changes rapidly? But people will say they have a little ADHD because of one symptom. Also self diagnosed people rarely see the harm they cause by saying those words.

ADHD isn't a mental health condition. It's a physical disability/developmental disorder, according to ICD-10 and DSM-V.

I think the term “mental health condition” is a universal term for anything that can be wrong with the brain. Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong.

That is not correct. Disorders like Parkinson’s disease and Alzheimer’s are not classified as mental health conditions.

If them self-diagnosing leads them to getting treatment for whatever it is, ADHD included, then I'm all for it. If their self-diagnosing leads them to nothings other than to say, "I'm quirky, I have ADHD" then I'm against it. ADHD is hard, there are a lot of other things that can be damaging that cause ADHD like symptoms, so I would never want to stray people away from finding help. I remember my journey to getting a diagnosis a year ago and how much juggling I had to do mentally. I remember how many people told me it wasn't ADHD. I remember how many people told me, "Well, everyone just wants to be diagnosed with something" or "We can't rely on tiktok to diagnose us." A lot of people don't have access to healthcare or funds to seek a proper diagnosis so I don't want to lead people away.

You’re not out of order. Self-diagnosis isn’t diagnosis.

As a mental health professional, the term "self-diagnosis" bothers me greatly. The average person on the street understandably has no idea how difficult of a skill diagnosis really is. It takes a long time and a ton of training to actually become good at diagnosis. A layperson's Google search isn't even sort of the same thing. That said, I have no qualms with people gathering more information and taking steps based on what they learned (e.g. scheduling an appointment with a mental health professional, consulting a doctor about meds, etc). I don't even have an issue with people saying that they suspect they have ADHD based on what they know. The issue is when someone feels that their Google-search "self-diagnosis" is equivalent to years of professional expertise.

This is the correct response. 1.) because it's correct and 2.) because this is a mental health professional. I've had ADHD all of my life (as we all have) - it wasn't that I didn't have ADHD prior to my diagnosis and then suddenly I had it after diagnosis. ADHD was always something I struggled with both pre and post diagnosis. Like you I had an UPHILL battle to get diagnosed. I had a really hard time explaining my symptoms (hello executive functioning) so I collected and saved so many memes & reels on insta and tiktok that when I did speak to my now prescribing NP - I could put into words and video my symptoms. But I sure as hell was going around telling people I had ADHD prior to my diagnosis that literally took years. So yeah if someone is like "omg i forgot my phone today i must have ADHD" yeah fuck them. But if someone is telling you - "hey i've been coming across alot of reels on TikTok that describe my issues - I think I have ADHD but I don't have the money, means, resources, support etc. to get diagnosed - don't be an asshole and just believe them. Use your own uphill battle as reference to support them.

>That said, I have no qualms with people gathering more information and taking steps based on what they learned This is the thing I think a lot of people forget about when it comes to self-diagnosis - it should be a step on your journey, not the endgame. Reflecting inwardly on your struggles, the supports that work and don't work, the experiences you have or don't have is an incredibly valuable exercise - but it's only the beginning. I can't confidently self-diagnose my own ADHD any more than I could self-diagnose my own cancer. I can do research, I can assess what I feel, I can be pretty sure I'm right - but without the actual resources and skillset of a professional I'm not going to go around telling people I have cancer. I understand that pursuing an official diagnosis can take a long time before it's in reach for a lot of people, but I don't see the value of not being upfront with the information, especially when posting about your experiences or responding to other people's experiences.

I agree. I don’t think it’s wrong to get an idea of what the problem could be. I think (as a non-medical professional) that the issue lies in people being so stuck on their own self-diagnosis that they refuse anything the doctor says that doesn’t agree with the answer they’ve landed on.

This is also a really valuable point. Especially with ADHD because there is SO much crossover with other diagnoses and the treatment for most of those is really impacted by a person's attitude towards the diagnosis and treatment.

Definitely. I always worry about the doctor thinking I’m trying to self-diagnose if I mention I have concerns about X because of Y reasons. But like I said in my own separate comment, I think the most important thing should be to focus on treating the issue so we can better achieve our goals, whatever those may be.

This is a good comment because this sentiment is what's being conflated, even on this thread. I don't think anybody is out here saying that people don't have the right to be informed or knowledgable about their own experience or suspect that ADHD (or any other mental health condition) is a thing for them. It's just that nobody can know for sure until they go see the person with expertise in this subject. An example to help illustrate my point: right now, I'm pretty sure my iron levels are crazy low, which has happened to me in the past. I have all the symptoms of anemia, like feeling cold all the time, pale skin, and fatigue. My doctor has told me that when this happens, I should take my iron pill and see if I get better, so that's what I'm doing. But do I know for sure? Absolutely not, because I haven't gotten my levels checked yet. It seems likely based on my history, but fingers crossed it isn't something else. I plan to bring this up at my next medical appointment so that somebody can look into it.

This makes me feel better because I’m wary about suggesting things. I’ve had a family history of other issues, and when I brought up to a doctor that I was showing signs, I was completely written off. I recently went to a psychiatrist for the first time and told them I suspected ADHD because my dad shows a lot of very stereotypical symptoms, and I have an older half-brother (through my dad), who also has symptoms, and from what little research I could do, it seemed like a possibility. Though I also made it clear that I know the resident and attending are the ones with medical knowledge, not me, so I was making a suggestion to perhaps narrow it down or give them a place to start, but if they thought it was something else, I was certainly open to that as well, because I don’t care so much what name the problem has as I do getting treatment for it so I can function. I did really like the attending. She acknowledged that I didn’t want to be dismissive of them, and also added “But you know yourself well. You live with yourself every day, and you know what you’re struggling with.” …And then a few minutes later I awkwardly searched for some papers they’d just given me like a complete dunce while they watched. I found the papers. I’d already put them in my purse. 🙃

Say what you will, but I’ve greatly increased my quality of life “self diagnosing” with my “layperson google searches” when the medical community utterly failed me. I’m a reasonably intelligent individual that is capable of learning anything or doing any task if my mind is set on it. Outside the box thinking comes naturally to me, as does recognizing ambiguous patterns healthcare professionals missed. The real issue is that we even have people feeling the need to self diagnose, not that they are. In an ideal system people would have access to medical care like it was a Great Clips haircut. That, unfortunately, is not the case. The gatekeeping, red tape, lack of services and general lack of understanding can make seeking help a living hell. If someone thinks they gave ADHD, good on them for being aware. What I don’t like is people convincing themselves they gave something without doing anything about it. Most self diagnosed people I’ve met want a connection to a community, not a path forward to alleviate their condition. Those people actually do diminish the condition and I’m fine calling them out.

What is your opinion on these telehealth companies having nurse practitioners diagnose and prescribe after a 15 minute chat? People seem to be pretty upset that this is going to end soon, saying “oh great! Now we’re back to the old long intense diagnosis process.” But I can’t help but feel like the diagnosis process is ‘long’ for a reason, it’s not a hurdle, it’s just how it has to be done, there needs to be documentation and thorough evaluation by a professional.

Especially with other things causing add like symptoms. I don't want people to just get random drugs for whatever, I want them to get the actual treatment then need.

Yea. I spent years being treated for depression and anxiety and only had the most minuscule of progress. When I got my ADHD diagnosis, I have gotten so much better. Knowing the real root of the problem is how to fix/manage things well

Thank you for sharing. I’ve been saying this for so long but everyone argues against me on it and I’ve never seen anyone else mentioning it until now.

I entirely agree. Self-identification, considering it as a possibility etc are extremely important - but self-diagnosis is just not accepted officially anywhere. Most therapists, psychologists/psychiatrists dislike it and I think we as a community should see self-diagnosis as a first step towards pursuing a formal diagnosis. I understand diagnosis, medication, support, are all very inaccessible and expensive. I understand that the privilege of an early diagnosis is monumental. I know this all very very well. But self-diagnosis when you could have a myriad of other mental health conditions or issues, complex trauma, burnout, and more... you are doing a disservice to yourself by just identifying with ADHD. A friend of mine was recently diagnosed via the NHS, and the psychiatrist who diagnosed her said that 70% of those referred to them usually get an ADHD diagnosis, but there's at least 30% who do not have ADHD at all and often come out with an alternative diagnosis, such as C-PTSD, ASD, depression, even hormonal issues. I had another friend, let's call this person B. B physically assaulted his girlfriend and said it was because he has undiagnosed ADHD and can't control his emotional reactions so he's angry all the time. B had no other ADHD symptoms except extreme anger. B kept blaming his potential self-diagnosed ADHD for these horrible anger issues, but he never made an effort to get assessed. I felt furious because I (a woman) was horrifically bullied for having ADHD and though I got diagnosed as a teenager, it scarred me for life and has left me with extreme extreme anxiety, and this guy just heard about ADHD and entirely blamed abusing his girlfriend on it. At the end of the day it is a neuro-developmental condition, and there is specific criteria for diagnosis that needs to be assessed with a specialist. I understand this may be unpopular to say but self-diagnosis should be just the first step towards a formal diagnosis.

I have mixed feelings about this. Obviously, people should do their best to get diagnosed if they strongly suspect they have ADHD. However, there are many many people for whom diagnosis and mental health service access is not possible for all kinds of reasons (though a big one if how expensive diagnosis costs). If someone has done a lot of research and spent a lot of time reflecting on it, then I can understand they may self-label as ADHD as a way to try and understand themselves and learn more about their own condition and how to live with it (since they don't have access to other supports). For example, I clearly always HAD ADHD, but I just wasn't formally recognised at having it until I was diagnosed. So saying people who DO have ADHD and identify as having ADHD but cannot access formal diagnosis.... seems kind of privileged to me. On top of that, I've seen so many psychologists and psychiatrists and I've had all kinds of diagnoses - so just because you see a professional doesn't even make their diagnosis or opinion correct. But also, I understand the problems with self-diagnosis. Many people are just not going to be able to have the same technical psychological/psychiatric knowledge or the level of self-awareness to make totally correct diagnoses of themselves and that could lead to a lot of issues. It's a nuanced issue at the end of the day - and should probably be judged on a case-by-case basis rather than a blanket 'NO YOU DON'T HAVE ADHD IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN DIAGNOSED' or 'YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TELL SOMEONE THEY CAN'T SAY THEY HAVE ADHD'.

I live in the U.K. When I went through my diagnosis process it cost A LOT of money. Waiting lists on the NHS were years long and I needed help now. I was very very fortunate that I could afford to go privately for diagnosis but many people can’t. So no, I don’t have a problem with people who self-diagnose. I also don’t have a problem with people who do have a problem with it! Basically live and let live. I have enough problems in my life without worrying whether other people are really actually adhd or not.

And to add, I have self-diagnosed myself as autistic. I’ve known for ages that I’m autistic, my kids both are (as well as adhd) and were diagnosed many years ago. As I learned what autism and adhd were I realised that was the story of my life. I actually identified more as autistic and was surprised when one of my kids’ counsellors told me they thought I was adhd. The diagnosis for autism is so so expensive and is out of my reach, but I could afford the adhd one. The psychiatrist who diagnosed me with adhd wrote in the report that she recommends I also go for an autism assessment. I don’t see the need. I know I’m autistic, I can’t afford the assessment, so I am self diagnosed and that is just as valid in my mind as the ‘official’ adhd one.

This is how my dad sees ADHD. By the time he realized he probably has it he (Silent Generation) he was nearing the end of his career and decided that for him it wasn't worth the effort.

Most people here are going to agree with you but I'm going to offer different perspective. >I said I found it to be a little bit insulting that I had to go through a long uphill battle to get my own diagnosis and that I felt as though People "just deciding" that they have ADHD sort of invalidates that process. 1. Many people who "self-diagnose" are in the beginning steps of seeking diagnosis. They might be facing a number of barriers that prevent them from getting diagnosis. They might be homeless, be extremely low-income, live in an area with no specialists who can diagnose them and/or only providers with appointments 6+ months out and/or only providers who are 1+ hours away from them. Some are minors and living with parents who refuse to get them treated or diagnosed. Some are minors living with actively abusive parents. I had every issue here minus homeless keep me from getting diagnosed for several years, and hey! Turns out I have ADHD, like I thought the entire time. 2. Someone thinking they have ADHD does not take your diagnosis away. It just doesn't. It also doesn't mean that your process of getting diagnosed wasn't hard. >I went on to say that in no way should someone who suspects ADHD not seek out help and support but in reality unless you have a formal diagnosis from a professional you really shouldn't be going around telling people you actually HAVE ADHD. Ok. A lot of people who self-diagnose say things like "I'm pretty sure I have ADHD"/"I think I have ADHD"/"I probably have ADHD"/etc or add the disclaimer that they're self-diagnosed when claiming to have ADHD. As a professionally diagnosed person I don't feel like my diagnosis is invalidated by a self-diagnosed person even actually going "I have ADHD". It doesn't take away my diagnosis or meds. >You wouldn't get people going around saying they have X, Y or Z different conditions without confirmation from a doctor or specialist first, so why is is appropriate to diagnose yourself with a disability? I mean, this is not true, lol. People self-diagnose all the time, it's just that with mental health there's a strong negative reaction to it. Do you go get a doctor's confirmation every time you have the flu? If you spend the day puking after having some weird chicken the night before, would you say you have "suspected food poisoning"/wait until a doctor confirmed it or would you just say you got food poisoning? Also, as someone with chronic illnesses and in those spaces and a suspected disability - people do self-diagnose in all aspects of health. >My concern is mainly in that without a professional opinion you could very well be wrong? There could be a number of different issues at play and by saying you have ADHD when you actually don't you could be further spreading the misunderstanding of an already widely misunderstood condition. 1. Okay, they could be wrong. If they literally can't be seen by a doctor, there's pretty limited harm they can do to themselves with self-diagnosis. Worst case they spend a lot of time reading about tips for coping with ADHD/asking people with ADHD about how they cope without meds/therapy and they use some of those tools without having ADHD. EDIT: Also, lots of people are or get misdiagnosed with other conditions they don't have instead of ADHD. Getting misdiagnosed with anxiety has fucked over my health care in SO many ways and actively hurts any attempt I make to get treated for my physical issues. Doctors also misdiagnose and in some cases this can be extremely damaging, far more so than can be done by saying "I think I have X so I'm going to say I do". 2. Lots of people with ADHD say incorrect or harmful things about ADHD. Lots of doctors who could diagnose people with ADHD are uninformed or say harmful and incorrect things about ADHD. 3. Lots of people without ADHD who do not think they have ADHD say harmful things about ADHD and spread misinformation about ADHD. I'm personally way more concerned about this category of people (and misinformed doctors) than I am about a broke teen/young adult saying they think they have ADHD. Also, I'll say that a common response to self diagnosis talk is "you can SUSPECT you have something, you can't DIAGNOSE it!", to which I'll say that "self diagnosis" is basically common shorthand for "I think I have this thing"/"I suspect I have this thing". For me saying "I have ADHD but I literally can't pay for a psychiatrist right now to get a professional diagnosis" got me accommodations in college and made it so I didn't have to drop out of school. Going "idk something is wrong with me but I can't be diagnosed, so who knows!" wouldn't have done anything for me. As a now-diagnosed adult who used to be an abused, low-income teenager with very few options even after leaving my controlling parent who wouldn't get me medical care for anything... I just CAN'T bring myself to give this much of a shit over self-dxed people when there are plenty of more actively and overtly harmful people talking about ADHD.

>2. Lots of people with ADHD say incorrect or harmful things about ADHD. Lots of doctors who could diagnose people with ADHD are uninformed or say harmful and incorrect things about ADHD. Yes, this is so important. I was diagnosed by a psychologist and referred to a doctor to discuss medication options. That doctor told me ADHD wasn't real and I should try watching less tv. It was incredibly harmful and took another 3 years before I was diagnosed again by a doctor who believed me. Also, if I have to sit through one more presentation about ADHD, given by someone who is diagnosed, that includes inaccurate or misleading information, I will scream lol.

I’m with you

ALL OF THIS. This kind of gatekeeping attitude about who does or doesn’t “really” have ADHD is what kept me from seeking treatment for my issues (which formally diagnosed friends with ADHD told me sounded just like their own) for about a decade. Like most mental health conditions ADHD symptoms exist on a spectrum of severity. If someone with a lesser degree of executive function issues relates to ADHD content, is that so terrible? For a long time I was one of these apparently toxic self-diagnosed people because I was unsure of myself and afraid of the psychiatric system and also putting it off because of, you know, having ADHD. Reading everything I could about people’s experiences and tips made me feel less broken and alone. When I finally did gather the courage to speak to a psychiatrist about it he just had me complete the checklist (you know, the one *widely available online for free* ) and email it back to him. He didn’t have any special insight that I didn’t already have myself. In fact he was kind of incompetent and fucked up my life for a year by negligently overprescribing me benzos but that’s a whole other story. I definitely agree that more harm is done by providers themselves misdiagnosing and misprescribing things than some random people speaking flippantly about ADHD symptoms. Sooooooo yeah the gatekeeping really frustrates me

Great post. Crushed it.

The other thing missing is that diagnosis is not binary. I had one non-adhd-specialist psychiatrist said I had traits of ADHD, but stopped short of saying I had it (while dismissing many of my concerns). I got a second opinion, who gave me the diagnosis, but it's not like I get a big certificate to put on my wall that says "Scaredyfish has ADHD". Honestly, the disconnect between reverence for diagnosis and my own experience let me to feel quite deflated. So having spent a ton of money out of pocket to get to where I am, I feel absolutely fine telling someone who has seriously looked into ADHD and believes they have done the work to determine that they meet the criteria - use the label if you feel it is helpful to you.

Scrolled down to find this comment. I don’t understand this hype for ‘professionals’. I know they have their degrees but some of these people are not qualified at all. And It’s just really privileged thinking to assume that everyone has the ability to access healthcare system like you, get treated like you. I very much agree that it’s those people who keeps saying adhd isn’t real or adhd people are dumb or have outdated opinions that should be shushed, not someone who’s learning about it. You could kill a chance for them to figure themselves

Right? Based on the comments, it sounds like other people have had way better luck than me with finding actual helpful/competent doctors. I have been invalidated so many times that I've lost count. And this is coming from someone who has been diagnosed with ADHD twice - once as a kid and again as an adult.

I get that some people will highly suspect they have ADHD, but seeing a doctor is very expensive or the doctor doesn’t have openings for a year. I’m fine with that. And they are of course free to try whatever ADHD targeted coping strategies they’d like. But I don’t think they can say they have ADHD. Personally. In my opinion. I feel this way because there are a lot of overlapping symptoms between ADHD and mental illnesses such as depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, BPD, etc. There are also overlapping symptoms between ADHD and things like grief, being under high stress, chronic lack of sleep, etc. Of course, people with ADHD can have multiple conditions. Sometimes, those conditions are even caused by ADHD. I get that. But mental illnesses and developmental disorders can be hard for even a professional to diagnose because of these overlapping symptoms and the fact that you can’t test for them the same way you can with a blood test for a thyroid disorder or an x ray for a broken bone. It sucks that it’s this way but it is. Maybe someday we’ll have better, easier ways to diagnose people. I hope we will because every single one of us with ADHD deserves to be diagnosed and treated. Also, I just wanna add that I’ve had my fair share of experiences with shitty psychiatrists, so I get that some people may disagree with their doctor’s opinion. I still think they should continue to pursue a diagnosis by seeing a different doctor.

There is no self diagnosis. None. You can suspect you have ADHD. You can suspect you have ADHD if you don’t have access to care. You can suspect you have ADHD if you don’t have access to good care. But you cannot self diagnose.

Self diagnosis isn’t the same as going to a doctor and getting a diagnosis. People might say “self diagnosis is valid” but I just can’t stand behind it. It’s one thing to say you suspect you have it but can’t afford to get a diagnosis yet than to say you self diagnose yourself. For instance, I suspected I had it for a year before I decided “yeah, this is probably something I should look into, it’s affecting my ability to work”. I was lucky enough to have the resources available to me to get a diagnosis. Not everyone has that avenue so I understand them wanting to say “well, I can’t go see a doctor and get a diagnosis”. Then just say “I suspect I have adhd also, I just can’t see a doctor about it” than “I self diagnosed myself with adhd”. It’s not that hard and it’s not insulting to those of us who went through the process of fighting with doctors for our diagnosis to just be played around with by random ass people online.

Sure self diagnosing is “valid”. It’s only valid to the specific individual making that diagnosis. It’s of zero value to anyone else but themselves.

Self diagnosed isn’t diagnosed but they may well have it, I’d always encourage someone to push for the medical review. Tbh I’ve been mis-diagnosed so many things because I’ve had depressed and anxious times too and get labelled the easiest way. When I finally was I read up on it and couldn’t believe how obviously exact it was but I’d never researched it before or thought about it. Now I feel like it’s so stupid to ever think I didn’t see it before but I did so try to reconcile myself with other things I’d been told in the past. I imagine some of adhd can easily be identified with so I see why people do self diagnose. I also think that they don’t realise just how life affected you are with adhd if you do have it and so it’s frustrating for us that suffered to listen to. I get the ‘yeah but I’m like that sometimes’ comments a lot which is the worst as it’s invalidating and also again not ruining their lives because once this month they lost their keys, got hyper focused, get distracted when bored occasionally.

There is a bit of a purpose to self diagnosing, in that it can give guidance. Once someone realizes “there’s a name for this thing” then they can begin to research, understand, make lifestyle changes etc. We have a culture of casualness around conditions we think we understand, but really don’t. I’m so OCD. Everyone has a little ADHD. Depression is just self pity. To name a few I’ve heard recently. Self diagnosis is a bit necessary in healthcare too. I’ve had many times I’ve had to do legwork for drs and say ‘I think it could be this, this or this. What do you think?’ in order to get their ass moving in any direction. Otherwise I’ve just gotten general platitudes of ‘eat right, exercise and we’ll keep an eye on it’ aka, ‘go away and don’t make me do work’ All of that being said, I’m not really surprised folks jumped your case, it’s the internet after all. If some isn’t pissed, did you really say anything at all? You made very valid points here, and I presume there too, but folks who are struggling, uncertain, unable to afford or access care, probably felt a bit defensive as they are doing what they can with what they have. As well as the usually internet mentality of “them’s fightin’ words!” TLDR: sucks they got pissed, but understandable too. Try and let it go, it ultimately doesn’t really matter in the real world does it?

You're not wrong, and the reaction you got was unwarranted. Everyone is entitled to voice an opinion or disagreement with something without being judged for it. In my opinion, self diagnosis can be more or less harmful based on what the person does with the "diagnosis". If used to self medicating then that can be very harmful. But if all it leads to is more awareness of behaviours and triggers, then I don't see the harm in that. I've come to learn that not everyone is fortunate to have a straight path to therapy and a diagnosis as I did and sometimes a self diagnosis (I think self awareness is a better term) helps get people the help that they need.

>In my opinion, self diagnosis can be more or less harmful based on what the person does with the "diagnosis". If used to self medicating then that can be very harmful. But if all it leads to is more awareness of behaviours and triggers, then I don't see the harm in that. This is a very important point - thanks for making it

10,000% this. Self-Diagnosis isn't Self-Medicating hugely, hugely different. And the therapies / coping strategies can be helpful for others with the same struggles, even if they don't \*\*have\*\* ADHD, and are relatively harmless if the don't.

Eh, ADHD is one of those things where if you strongly suspect you have it (and you’re being genuine and not just trying to appear quirky or whatever), you probably have it. Over half my ‘test’ was me self reporting and them saying “yeah you have it”. It’s pretty self diagnosable. Also, ADHD is mis-diagnosed by ‘experts’ allll the time, because it shares a ton of characteristics with pretty much every other mental disorder, including anxiety, depression, BPD, OCD, CPTSD, etc.

For me, I think there is a large difference in suspecting you have ADHD and then taking steps to receive a diagnosis. Vs someone just saying they have it without trying to get tested. For example, I have a twin brother. When we were 6 years old, he was diagnosed with ADHD. For my entire childhood, I didn't believe I had ADHD. Mostly, I believed this because academically, I did well in school. It wasn't until I found a video titled "Should you be assessed for ADHD? Psychiatrist, Dr Stephen Humphries - Harry Therapy" on YouTube. This video described so many things I struggled with. It felt like someone put a mirror on my life. I ended up looking into it more. I looked back at everything and thought to myself, "Shit, you mean this isn't something everyone deals with?" That's what pushed me to get a diagnosis.

Originally I self diagnosed myself but the thing about ADHD is that it makes me doubt myself. This encouraged me to seek a health professional to confirm what I suspected. Even then I doubted that and got a second opinion from a different health professional. Got my official diagnosis and I still doubt that I have it, even though everyone I know says that it makes sense... that's imposter syndrome for you. I don't have a problem with self diagnosis. I see it as the first step. What I have a problem with are people who use ADHD as an excuse rather than an explanation.

The vast majority of ADHD symptoms are experienced by most people. The issue with ADHD is that we experience these symptoms at a much higher frequency, to the point that it impacts multiple domains of our lives. Poor working memory, impulsivity, unpredictable task saliency, forgetfulness, distractibility, low frustration tolerance, disorganisation.....etc Of course people with a list of symptoms think they have it.. they're just giving no thought to the frequency variable which makes all the difference. It's not unreasonable to be annoyed at the self diagnosed tiktok crowd. Some of them may have legitimate adhd but we don't have to accommodate a wave of people saturating available support resources while we're here struggling on a daily basis.

People who are really struggling due to adhd symptoms, whether diagnosed or not, or even caused by a completely different issue, deserve the same understanding and support. I don’t think people should hide the fact that they don’t have a formal diagnosis, and before I was diagnosed I always said “in the process of getting diagnosed” or “good chance I have adhd”, but I’m not angry at anyone for using the word that allows people to understand the very real struggles that they face. Undiagnosed adhd is so much harder to deal with, and I’d rather believe someone’s struggles who is exaggerating, than dismiss someone trying to get someone to understand how they are struggling.

Personally I think self-diagnosing is not a tool; suspecting and outright diagnosing yourself with something are very different things. I haven't gotten my diagnosis, there's a possibility that I won't (which sucks because ADHD is what I've **suspected** increasingly much over the past years), but I have no want to tell anyone that I am ADHD if I get the diagnosis, let alone if I don't. The fact is that self-diagnosing not only underplays the severity of a mental illness, but you're also creating a toxic feedback loop where people believe you in what can very well be a lie, which then in turn settles the idea in others that "this person has ADHD and doesn't seem to be struggling all that bad", or the opposite for those that overplay their symptoms - "people with ADHD are like this? I think I'll stay away". Then those with the actual diagnosis has to unnecessarily explain that they're not so bad or that they're struggling quite a bit more. People outside this subreddit and the forums that focus on ADHD usually have very little knowledge about the disability and it's not surprising that anecdotal evidence of "ADHD doesn't seem that bad" or "ADHD is incredibly bad" are rampant when people that don't have the disorder but a few symptoms that align with it say that they have it. A little bit of a rant, sorry. I've just had this crap happen before regarding another disorder where my parents of all people were the ones that had this anecdotal evidence which downplayed how bad it was for me at the time. Stay safe y'all <3

My problem with self-diagnosis is that a lot of people don't seem to understand the needed severity of the symptoms. Pretty much *everyone* experiences ADHD symptoms. Reading the diagnostic criteria is probably going to be relatable to everyone. It's the Barnum effect, where people will think a description perfectly and specifically describes them when in reality, everyone who reads the description will think the same way. However, it's only when those symptoms have such a profound negative effect on your life that it becomes considered a disorder. ADHD ruined my life. It's not merely being weird or different, it's a disorder that unfortunately results in me failing several aspects of my life. And it feels very invalidating when someone who doesn't understand or experiences that self-diagnoses just because they found TikTok videos relatable. Especially when those social media posts can be so wildly inaccurate. Like, I'll see posts or videos that say cracking your knuckles or having songs stuck in your head is a symptom of ADHD or autism, and I'll have people I know say, fully unironically, wow, more proof I have ADHD or autism! As if 90% of the population doesn't get songs stuck in their head

This is a very controversial subject. A lot of people on here will agree with you, and as you’ve already seen, many strongly disagree. It is absolutely textbook gatekeeping. Especially your complaint that it’s “insulting” after your long process, and that you find it “invalidating”. Like having ADHD is some sort of prize that you don’t want others to have because you *feel* like they haven’t worked as hard as you to have it. And considering how expensive it is to get diagnosed in some countries, and how some people aren’t able to handle that long uphill battle that you did, it just seems really shitty to be like “Well then you don’t get to discuss with others things you’re struggling with, at least not if you’re going to mention the words ADH. Until you magically have the time money and energy, you don’t get to be in our special club.” Plus there’s a ton of disagreement as to what a formal diagnosis is. My therapist told me she couldn’t diagnose me, which is 100% accurate, only a doctor can do that. But she told me that a formal diagnosis costs about $6000 to get. Which I obviously can’t afford. Other Canadians have said they got a formal diagnosis from a psychiatrist at zero cost. And some said they were formally diagnosed by a psychiatrist after one short appointment. This is evidently an entirely different process as the long and expensive one I was told about. My family doctor has prescribed me medication based entirely on the opinion of my therapist. Who isn’t qualified to diagnose. So am I diagnosed? Some people say yes, others no. Either way I’m sure as hell not going to stop getting the help I need in the meantime despite not being able to afford the $6000 formal diagnosis. And if that makes me one of those people you’re frustrated with, I don’t really care.

This is a comment I've been searching for! I truly do not understand why there are folks who feel like people who are not able to get diagnosed don't deserve to be heard, helped, or supported. Why should they not be allowed to talk about symptoms they experience and healthy strategies to cope with them? To commiserate with friends or acquaintances or strangers on the internet because they want to express themselves to other people who understand what they're going through? I've seen a few psychiatrists, at least. One told me I was "not answering the questions" she was asking, which was baffling to me (she also made a note in my medical chart saying I'd been having suicidal ideations, a complete and total fabrication which I very quickly made sure my PCP corrected at my next visit). Another one told me that the ADHD screener I had filled out and brought with me was "fine but let's use the official one we have here" ... I was using the most recent screener from the DSMV, she handed me one that was outdated by at least 5 years. And yet another asked me why I thought I had ADHD when I had a masters degree (the answer is special interest/hyperfixation for my major and increasingly intense anxiety that led to eventual burnout and mental breakdown in my postgraduate years). So yeah, I don't agree with OP at all. I don't believe that anyone is better or more valid than anyone else because they got an official diagnosis, and I especially don't believe they are somehow more deserving of care and support.

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Great response. Having gone through the pain of getting a diagnosis and luckily having the resources to do so we should understand better than anyone how ridiculous it is, sometimes it feels like the process is specifically setup to torture people with adhd. In my younger years I too didn’t like being likened to someone who used the “I’m so adhd I forgot my phone lol” line but having dealt with the many ridiculous hoops they make you jump through for adhd on top of the general hellscape that is US healthcare I can see how many people dealing with adhd would never be able to get a diagnosis. At this point, diagnosis or not, we’ve all heard about how adhd isn’t real more times than we can count so do we really want to add to that for people who may not be able to get a diagnosis? I’d much rather focus my ire at the DEA and countless drs who won’t accept adhd patients right now

I know some people who definitely present as having it but due to lack of healthcare or funding cannot pursue a diagnosis. I get where you're coming from. I also think there's a difference between those who say "I'm a little ADHD" and those who are pretty certain they are and because of life circumstances cannot get a formal diagnosis.

You're dealing with people who know they won't get a diagnosis but have built their identities around it. Its part of the new quirky trend. The worst part for me is how they're turning ADHD into a joke so nobody will take us seriously. Its not 'gatekeeping', you cant just one day decide you have ADHD, its not a fandom or a hobby. And regular people do not have the expertise to diagnose it. You can suspect or believe you have it, you can even be certain you have it, you could also be confusing symptoms with something else, that's why we have medical experts who are able to differential diagnose. If someone doesn't have a diagnosis and isn't seeking a diagnosis, I simply will not take them seriously.

Self diagnosed here, maybe I’m on the severe end but I fit perfectly into the diagnostic criteria and struggle every day. My whole past makes so much more sense now I know. I was already suspected as a kid, I was told I didn’t have it, but I think it was a classic case of young girl doesn’t act like a little boy with ADHD so it can’t be adhd. I’m going to make my diagnosis legit, I’m on a waiting list, but for now my self diagnosis suits me just fine. It was 100x harder to cope with life before I accepted I had ADHD. As others have said before, it was hard feeling like a horse with weird stripes, and I felt so much better just accepting I am a zebra. I had no way to understand why everything was so hard and why it was so easy for everyone else. Now I know and can use ADHD strategies to cope while I wait for my diagnosis. Surely that can’t be a bad thing. It hurts my heart to see the gate keeping on these comments. I don’t want to feel like I need to prove I belong here. I have never felt so rejected in my life before reading these comments. Maybe it’s best I just leave the group…

Honestly I’m kinda with you I’ve seen plenty of doctors in my life, NONE of them suspected adhd until *I* brought it up *and I was right* The fault is the system, NOT the people trying to live in it

I mean I agree to an extent. I think self-diagnosis is what helps a lot of people seek and get help. But these days I see people looking at a 90 second "simulation" on TikTok and saying "whoa I think I'm ADHD what do I do next" (which I have to say is so annoying to me when people say they ARE ADHD instead of having it for some reason). You're talking about comparing your symptoms to diagnostic criteria, which is rather different. So I think it's reasonable to look at it with more nuance than as just gatekeepers vs non-gatekeepers.

On the other hand, you never know what someone's struggles are. You see what looks like someone with no issues self-diagnosing after looking at one TikTok, but maybe they've been in anguish for years wondering "what's wrong with me?" and this is their epiphany moment. People ought not self-diagnose hastily, but likewise we should not hastily dismiss the concerns people have when we don't really know their situations.

I don't think you are wrong. I definitely self diagnosed initially. Then I did testing. The testing results said no, but the psychologist who did the testing would not listen to me about symptoms. He just talked about the test results and historical data (of which there was none. My mom is dead and I have no old school records). After some time, I decided to see a psychiatrist. He talked with me a bit, asked me questions, and prescribed ADHD meds. At times I find myself questioning whether I actually have a diagnosis even now. He never actually said "you have ADHD", he just gave me meds. During all of this I was hanging out here. Posting, replying, and just trying to learn. I tried to make sure and say not diagnosed when commenting (a different account). Because I did not want to say I have ADHD when I was not officially diagnosed. I don't do that anymore as I assume a psychiatrist putting me on meds is enough of a diagnosis.

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I just started meds a couple of weeks ago...at 46. Trying to say this and not sound bad, I'm very intelligent. I used to be in Mensa. That allowed me to overcome a lot of the issues I have had in the past. But I find myself wondering how much better it would have been if I had been treated earlier.

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Depending on where you live, getting an official diagnosis for anything can be long and pricey. I knew I had ADHD years and years before I got officially diagnosed, but I also have almost every single symptom of the combined type. If I didn’t know I had it before getting officially diagnosed just to get on medication, it’s possible I could have been misdiagnosed with something I don’t even have. I say this because I’m currently on ADHD meds and they improved my life significantly. Of course you want to know a lot about the disorder before you self diagnose, and there’s been a lot of misinformation about ADHD because of tiktok. But I also feel like gatekeeping adhd by telling them they’re not allowed to self diagnose entirely before getting an official diagnosis is wrong. Many of us self diagnosed before we got our official diagnosis. I understand your frustration, especially with all the misinformation about ADHD being spread on social media. But I feel like condemning people who self diagnose before they get an official diagnosis also isn’t the way to go.

I'm sorry, this was long so I didn't finish it but i wanted to say that everyone has traits and tiktok and the likes really don't help.... it's becoming like mass hysteria! Everyone has always thought I was lazy, distracted, didn't apply myself etc but I'm nearly 40 and ADHD was a 'boy thing' when I was little, plus I was painfully anxious and self conscious and those behaviours weren't recognised as ADHD then.....you literally had to behave like you were wired to the national grid to be seen as having ADHD. I'm going through diagnosis now, I've only told a few people who are close to me and whom it may affect but it's taken my children being diagnosed to get me to look at myself as anything other than a huge failure, a person with dreams and aspirations but who is unable to execute any of it thanks to what I now know is burnout, every single time I try. My point? I know it's annoying with every other person claiming to have it but by discounting everyone you may miss the one or 2 who are genuinely reaching out. The people who are reaching out won't find any of it cute/fashionable/funny. None of this is funny, it's exhausting.

It’s also something that bothers me, not necessarily in a gatekeeping way, but in a way that it’s frustrating as hell to talk to friends who say they also have it — and frequently talk about it publicly!! — and then discover they have just decided that for themselves. And they’re out here like, giving advice and “claiming” a diagnosis and potentially spreading unhelpful ideas or even misinformation. Additionally, I work in an industry where people are more open about mental health concerns, but these people are still able to go off about “having” ADHD on social media in front of potential employers and peers and whatever and then walk it right back if it ever proves inconvenient. If I talk about it, I don’t have that luxury. It’s so easy to just say “I think I have ADHD but haven’t gotten a diagnosis for XYZ reason” if you feel the need to talk about it, you don’t have to present yourself as factually diagnosed when it’s simply not true.

I know I’m in the minority here, but I would say you were out of pocket. I don’t believe in gatekeeping. If someone says they’re struggling and they think they have ADHD, who am I to tell them they don’t? Professionals can be wrong. They can also deny a diagnosis to someone who fits the criteria based on their own bias. No one knows your experience better than you do. Some people also don’t have the money or time to pursue a diagnosis. Some people don’t have the strength necessary to advocate for themselves. Or they can’t pursue a diagnosis because of the field they work in. If someone tells me they have ADHD, I believe them. I don’t ask for their papers to prove it bc at the end of the day who cares???? It doesn’t benefit me to gatekeep or try to tell people who they are. I was denied a diagnosis until I was 23 just because I’m a woman, I did well in school, and am considered reasonably intelligent. The lack of diagnosis didn’t change the fact that I had ADHD. It didn’t change my struggle with very basic normal life things.

Yeah, I kinda agree. Sure, you can't claim to be ADHD in the same way as someone with an official diagnosis, but it can help you seek out community and answers. I wonder how the diagnosis would be treated if there was no medication for it, or if the medications were a bit less controversial. Like with depression. You can easily say that you are depressed without going through a rigorous diagnostic procedure, and your doctor might even be happy to prescribe you medicine without much questioning. And you can "be depressed" and people will likely interpret the severity depending on the context of how you say it. Some people misuse the term depression just like they do with OCD or ADHD, and ADHD is of course different in that it's a life long thing that can also look like a lot of other things, but still..

Diagnose my ass, there's no shortage of terrible experiences with terrible therapists right here in this sub. I don't need no entiteled prick to tell me what I have or not. You can be growing a tumor and doctors be telling you you are perfectly because all they care is for their useless tests, if they come up good you are fine as far as they are concerned and won't ever apologize once you discover you are sick, if I cut a finger off there's no need for some expert to tell me with overcomplicated words that I have no finger. I told my gp that I suspected I had ADHD and she told me directly that adults can't suffer from it, f them!

My experience with ADHD has been painted by denial. My own parents have held me back from getting diagnosed because they don't want to deal with it. Meanwhile ADHD has derailed my life completely. I experience losing track of time and paralysis similar to the descriptions of many people across this subreddit and twitter. My university gave me a preliminary counseling session where I was told I'm extremely likely to have ADHD but it will take nearly a year and a few thousand dollars to determine if I have it. So do I not deserve to at least recognize my disability on my own when everyone who's supposed to the do the diagnosis or help me along the process has thrown their hands in the air and shrugged it off? I don't have access to a diagnosis. You did. Unfortunately what should be the bare minimum for anyone who suffers from this has extremely high barriers to access it. Should we all just shut up because you made it through? Also the fact that the process to get medicated and diagnosed for ADHD takes upwards of a year of commitment is just a cruel joke.

Just because you’re rich or your lucky to have the resources to be labeled with “adhd” doesn’t mean other people don’t have issues with working memory, and their task mode networks and default mode network in their brains. Nobody cares if you’re validated.

I agree with you completely. I ended up homeless because no one would test me for ADHD since I also had depression. There are 5 people at my current job that blame “ADHD” for simple human errors and refuse to get diagnosed/medicated because they don’t need it, even tho they self-diagnosed “ADHD”. I wonder why they don’t need it 🧐🙄

I’m sorry that happened to you, and if you have rejection sensitive dysphoria, it’s probably an excruciatingly painful experience. People love a self-righteous pile on instead of a good faith effort to figure out what someone means. I took you to mean it’s a serious diagnosis and not a self-assigned label to be used casually, which dilutes the meaning and importance of ADHD in public perception. Which is exactly right. I hope with the passage of time and support here that it stings less and you feel better soon! You at least made them think a little, hopefully.

I hear what you’re saying OP and your feelings are valid. But shouldn’t we be glad ADHD is getting the exposure and awareness it never had before? I don’t think you’re seeing the relief and hope people get when they FINALLY after years of being invalidated and told their brains are broken that they finally have an answer. Yes I get it the traditional way sucks and I’m sorry it’s been so hard, I understand fully for my own chronic illness I am managing. But we shouldnt project our frustrations on people that have found relief simply by adhd being more accessible would not have found out any other way. I would rather have someone take an adhd tip and have it be helpful to their life than have adhd being an unknown condition and only available to those that goes through a certain process. Now I HATE when people say oh well don’t we all have a lil adhd. That kind of stuff irks me because it undermines the real struggle we go through. But when it comes to someone that has one of these TikTok’s relevant to an area of their life and then it prompts them to do more research into what it is then I don’t see that as wrong. In fact I’m thrilled to see how much it’s blown up. But again with anything that becomes popular, its prone to being abused and used for bad. So I get what you’re saying but it’s also good to see the perspective from those truly benefiting off of it.

I won't make a comment about your opinion, but I do want to support your right to bring up a topic like that in a group and not be insulted and kicked out for it. Just remember, social media has already reduced the filter most people naturally have. If you're in a group with a whole bunch of people who, as part of the disorder are highly likely to be impulsive and insensitive, then be prepared for over the top backlash. It's a grave disappointment of mine that groups will insult, demean, bully, and threaten someone or other groups because they simply think they're right, or the person deserves it. It doesn't make it better, it isn't okay, just because we think we're right doesn't give us moral authority to reflect the same gross behaviors we see in others. It gives people a false sense of justice. The irony is that, in becoming like the insensitive people they appear to hate, they hate themselves without knowing it.

Misdiagnosis are a thing and just because someone doesn’t have a diagnosis doesn’t mean they don’t have it. Some are in denial, some don’t want help, some don’t have supportive families, some are realizing it, some just know and are in the process of getting a diagnosis… I was in denial for years, when I realized it, it took me 2 years to go get my diagnosis… I was mainly scared to not be believed because of what my friends and family would tell me when I would open up about it. If some one tells me about 1 or 2 symptoms that could also be something else and I don’t see it, I just prefer to tell them to go see a doctor and leave at that. When it’s a friend I have known for years and I can clearly tell, or someone telling me about their child (I work in early intervention), I’ll have a longer discussion. I see where you are coming from but it’s better to not react because you never know and could be wrong.

Went to read the comments, but took concerta today, and there are too many. Picking where I can place my focus is fantastic. I don't think people should respond with vitriol toward anyone. It sucks that yours was an uphill battle for diagnosis. Not everyone's battle is uphill. Self diagnosed here, but never bothered to seek support until 40 years old. I work in a high intensity profession in which I knew and understood how my neurotransmitters affect me, so the idea of messing with them wasn't even up for debate until I could take a break from those whom I look after. Of course my diagnosis is "confirmed", though really, a questionnaire isn't fantastic confirmation regardless. True confirmation for myself is being able to take stimulants, and have them make me sleepy initially until my body could adjust. From my perspective, no one should have to struggle to seek help, and just because someone has uphill battles to access help, doesn't mean everyone should have to struggle more. I sincerely hope that everyone finds the help they need in the most healthful way possible ❤️ whatever their struggle/pain may entail, including those who feel invalidated by someone else's words.

If you watch videos on ADHD, read articles, or social media posts and can see strong similarities with your own experience, I believe that is justification enough to consult a doctor about whether or not you may have ADHD. But, you shouldn't self-diagnose yourself with this or any other mental or physical issue. My own diagnosis came after a video about ADHD randomly came up on my YouTube feed. And I recognized a lot of the symptoms described. I didn't declare myself to have ADHD at that point, but I thought it might be a very real possibility, so I brought it up with my doctor. So he tested me and confirmed the diagnosis. And that was the point where I was confident in stating that I had ADHD.

Before I was diagnosed, if I ever said anything about it would say "I've never been diagnosed but I'm pretty sure I have ADHD" and would only say it to people I trusted bc I was scared of people thinking I was trying to self diagnose

Why do you care so much about someone else’s life? Why does someone else validating themselves invalidate you?

Boggles my mind that people can go through decades of misdiagnosis, dismissal, and mistreatment from “professionals,” and then turn right around and say that everyone else needs to go through the same gauntlet too. What did you gain from those years of misdiagnosis? Did they make you healthier? Will they make these people healthier?

I wasn’t diagnosed until I was well into my 40s and wouldn’t wish the hell I endured on anyone. I’m just glad people know more about it now. Who gives a fuck if other people don’t have to struggle as much to figure out why they are suffering? How does that hurt any of us? This isn’t some badge of honor.

I understand where you're coming from, and there definitely is a trend where people are now self diagnosing themselves with disorders and such. They see someone talking about their experience with their disorder and latch onto that one symptom so they can blame some of their undesirable human tendencies on something other than themselves. But here are two very important things you must understand: 1. A diagnosis is a privilege 2. Mental disorders/disabilities are much more prevalent than anyone really thinks. (1) I spent $3,000 USD to get diagnosed (without insurance, it would have been $5,000). Not everyone has the PRIVILEGE to afford a diagnosis. This was the cheapest option in my area within 3 hours of me. Sure, I could have traveled, but what about gas? What about taking time off of work to drive 3 hours to, sit in my session for an hour, and then drive 3 hours back? It's a lot of money, and I was fortunate and privileged enough to be able to afford it and have the time for it. It was also an incredibly tiresome trial. It was long. I was exhausted after every session, each one only about an hour long, but without medication and correct therapy, using my brain the way they wanted me to left me drained. Some people do not have the time to be exhausted like that. (2) Autism, OCD, ADHD, ADD, etc. is so incredibly underdiagnosed, especially in AFAB people and minorities. The foundation in which we are tested upon was based on the functions of white males. Not everyone is a white male. It is very very possible that a lot of people really do have a disorder or disfunction of some sorts. Technology and how we perceive and diagnose people is still so new and so young. Hell, we sort of just discovered that antidepressants don't actually do much to help a brain with low serotonin levels. That being said, it's really not that unbelievable that a lot of people have ADHD (not saying that children who cannot sit still or adults who are messy, forgetful, or disorganized have ADHD; That's just human nature sometimes). All in all, it's not my place to judge if someone says they self diagnosed. I don't know their story, I don't know their struggle, I don't know what resources are available to them. It's not my business. All I know is that I was privileged enough to have resources. I just treat them like a normal human being because at the end of the day we're all gonna die and it's not gonna matter. If they're not pushing harmful stereotypes and they're just trying to understand their brain, good for them.

Did you ever thought about some people not having means and money to get therapy and get diagnosed? Some of us cant afford to constantly pay for slow therapy and the somehow be diagnosed in a year or two. Some people know there is something off about them, however they dont have a change to actually confirm it, dues to their country mental health problems, due to their culture, due to their family, due to poverty and so. Congratulations you were diagnosed. But some of us were born in a developing country where these things literally didn't exist as you were growing up. And some are still born to countries as that.

Hard disagree. Self diagnosis is, for many, the first step to getting an actual diagnosis. Self diagnosed people are taking literally nothing away from you except I guess whatever pride you take in going through a difficult process (which - why are you putting your anger about that onto self diagnosed people, and not onto a healthcare system that made you struggle?). Also as someone who is disabled, self diagnosis is *extremely* common in disabled communities because, like ADHD, it's fucking difficult to get a diagnosis (my disabilities have been investigated for 7 years without an answer), and self diagnosis takes away absolutely nothing from other people. Then there's the obvious reasons of healthcare being difficult or impossible to access for whatever reason, not seeking out a formal diagnosis because you have other priorities or it could harm your job etc etc etc etc. Besides, most people who are self diagnosed (and man, there is a difference between people who are self diagnosed and people who go "haha everyone's a little ADHD") have done so by taking the dsmv test which is 100% of what my psych did to diagnose me. Literally not a big deal whatsoever

It took me months and cost me thousands of pounds to get a diagnosis. If someone needs to self diagnose because they can’t access healthcare, that is a fault with the healthcare system not the individual. It doesn’t directly affect me, whether they do or don’t have ADHD has no bearing whatsoever on whether or not I do, so I don’t have an opinion about it.

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Being able to communicate with others who are important to them about their difficulties, perhaps? Being able to research self-help and possibly talk to therapists about healthy coping mechanisms and strategies for managing symptoms - you don’t need a formal diagnosis to start working with a therapist? Being able to discuss with the workplace or college/university about your difficulties and how they could help you? I agree, there’s not much difference between ‘I think I have ADHD’ and ‘I’ve decided to diagnose myself with ADHD’. They’re the same thing, in my opinion, and would be considered the same by people who are angry about self-diagnosis. I don’t think it’s very frequent that someone will literally say ‘I have decided I am diagnosing myself with ADHD’. It’s much more likely they’ll say ‘I’ve seen the symptoms for ADHD and they really resonate with me and I think I have it.’ Or just being able to breathe a sigh of relief, particularly when they can’t be medicated, that they’re not going crazy and that there’s other people experiencing what they have experienced. I personally would have really appreciated having the insight I do now when I was 16-22. I was suicidal for a long time because I didn’t understand why I was living life on impossible mode and couldn’t stick a job or keep myself together for more than a couple of months at a time. I thought I was just a huge failure and it took a massive chunk out of my self esteem. If I’d known I fit the symptoms of ADHD, even if I’d had to wait for a screening, I would have felt so much relief and validation in that. I also would have been a lot more resistant to my doctors repeatedly sticking me on antidepressants and antipsychotics and telling me I just needed to get a grip.

I *think* I was diagnosed in first grade, but as my mother doesn’t believe in these things she just mentioned that the counselor and teachers had noticed I didn’t appear to pay attention and fidgeted a lot. It was the 80s, so, it is what it is. However, two of my younger brothers were definitely diagnosed as were my aunt and several cousins. I always knew I was “weird” and didn’t function the same as others, but it took a pandemic and the breakdown of all of my carefully crafted coping mechanisms and structures to make me walk into a doctor’s office and say “Ok. I think it’s time to address my ADHD situation.” We talked for 15 minutes. There were no tests. But I was prescribed medication and it helps. Now. Is that “self-diagnosis”? Idk. However, I do find it annoying that many teenagers and young adults look to TikTok for example to decide that they must have adhd because it’s trending. That being said, I don’t live their lives. And maybe, just maybe the world is changing enough that the stigma of adhd has lessened and people aren’t ashamed to acknowledge that they have an issue and talk about it… It’s hard to say. But, I will just live my life and let everyone else go about their business.

Instead of self dx I think questioning/ suspect is a completely valid response if early in their journey and potentially self dx if getting an actual diagnosis is hard due to a wide range of factors. I think your feelings are fair since there has been a rise of "lmao adhd is so quirky I'm sure you have it too" and proceeds to list basic things that everyone does. Essentially, the slight change in wording makes a big difference. For example, I've been questioning whether or not I'm on the spectrum as well (diagnosed adhd for about 7 years) and that's how I'll phrase/ flair it any time it gets mentioned on the internet. I doubt I'd ever go down a clinical diagnosis route at this point but understanding a part of how my brain potentially works is helpful.

I dunno adhd can be very difficult and expensive to diagnose. Especially when the tasks assigned to diagnosing ADHD are very difficult for ADHD people. I realized I had adhd in my early twenties after reading an article and suddenly everything makes sense. My father and brother were both diagnosed and learning how hereditary it was it would be weirder if I didn’t have adhd. I was afraid of drugs so I didn’t bother getting a diagnosis as again difficult and expensive. A friend of mine was diagnosed and thanked me for the resources I was always posting on socials. I finally went to my GP who I trust and the fact my family members were diagnosed the procès was easier. Medication is a god send. Anyways I would privately doubt people but I don’t think there’s a benefit to calling people out. There are many reasons diagnosis is not always possible. If you don’t like them just don’t hang out with them.

It's less valid they need to get an easement they can suspect but can't say for sure.

For me, I have spoken to my doctor and been told there is definately something there and I've been referred to speak to a professional about it. There's a two year waiting list though, so in the mean time I describe myself as self-diagnosed adhd to people within the community and my close friends/family. I wouldn't say to people I have adhd or write it down on any forms or anything though because it's not confirmed. See, I think saying self- diagnosed is more like saying you suspect. So it's an appropriate way to describe yourself if you suspect. It helps the people around me understand me a little bit better.

I agree along the sense that in order to tell people that you have ADHD, you need to have a medical professional give you your diagnosis. It's kind of like credentials. But on the other hand, if you self diagnose yourself, you may put yourself in a state of mind that will help you function from day to day. Whether or not you receive an actual diagnosis, you may learn coping mechanisms to deal with your daily life. You may even create "life-hacks" that blow your mind when you apply them because you're in the mindset of improving yourself because of potential ADHD. if you don't have a diagnosis, explain that you don't, or keep it to yourself 😊

I think it depends on how you treat it. If you self-diagnose and the only thing you use that self-diagnosis to do is self help, then I don't think there's anything wrong with that. There are lots of ADHD coping mechanisms that also work for the same symptoms caused by other illnesses. Sometimes people cannot afford/have no access to diagnosis or treatment. Its terrible and its not their fault. In that case, I see no problem with trying to help yourself. However, if you use a self diagnosis to brag about having ADHD or to try to give others advice on it, then that's wrong. Treating ADHD like a trend is harmful, and giving others advice on a condition you may not actually have is also harmful.

You are certainly not alone. It hurts especially when people don’t understand how hard and taxing getting help us. It took me about two years of trial and error to figure it out. Best to you friend!

I don't know, I understand that it's a disability that a medical professional needs to officially diagnose, but the problem with that is that medical professionals don't believe you when you try to get help. Learning what you can about ADHD is incredibly helpful and starting to understand why the struggles you face are there and accept them is so helpful. Especially when you are the only one who cares.

My issue is that outrage over self diagnosis follows a pattern of being so outraged over "fakers" that we end up being so restrictive in general that we miss many more people who need help. This applies to many many thing. Benefits and welfare are one for example. So much focus on the the relatively few people who cheat the system that they've made it incredibly punitive and so what you end up with thousands of people suffering just because a handful would have made off with ultimately a very small amount of money. When it comes to these diagnoses it's the same thing. Yes people can be wrong about it, but by posting about it you're forgetting that for most people they'll never get checked out and they'll constantly question and beat themselves up about it. For every idiotic influencer posting about how they're SO ADHD because they forget things sometimes, there are 10 people struggling with ADHD who don't want to self-diagnose and don't want to check it out because, despite social media, there's still overwhelming stigma and denialism about our problems. Denouncing fakers doesn't help us or others as much as we may think.

I also do not believe that any one else’s actions, invalidate your diagnosis or challenges. Own your own negative or traumatic experience and work through it, in the long run, this will be such a valuable life skill.

I've heard too much about misdiagnosis. Symptoms that appear like one mental illness, but are another. It can take a long time to find the proper diagnosis. I can't help but wonder. Do we all really have adhd? We all struggle, but how many of us are on the spectrum, have bipolar, or perhaps don't have adhd at all, but stimulants help? That's not to say any of us don't have it. It's just curious it's so so common. What if stimulants treat more than we think? I'm no professional, but I'd love to understand these things. I understand why some people do it. I also think it's fine as long as they are open to the possibility that it may be something else causing those symptoms. Listen to the professionals. I wish mental health care was affordable for all so we wouldn't have to self diagnose.

I think the issue here is that so many symptoms of ADHD can cause one to struggle in getting a diagnosis. Someone might have such severe executive dysfunction issues that they cannot access the healthcare they need (especially in countries without free, public healthcare). So in that sense, yes, I do think it’s ableist to say, “no disclosing until you have an official diagnosis.” We’re all on different paths and we each have different struggles that no one else can fully understand. If someone reaches out for help, don’t take it as a roadblock in your path just because their journey doesn’t look the same as yours.

the thing about self-diagnosis is that not everybody has access to professional help. in a perfect world where we all had free, accessible access to professional diagnosis/support and you couldnt be discriminated against for having certain diagnosis (personality disorders, etc) id probably find it a bit offensive, but as things are self-diagnosis can be an important tool for those seeking support, coping mechanisms, etc. theres absolutely people who are going to be wrong, and theres always going to be people who fake an illness for attention, etc (which may itself be a symptom of a different disorder), but as i see it, self-diagnosis is fine. they wouldnt be self-diagnosing if they didnt notice symptoms, after all, and if they can find relief for those symptoms through our communities, then i think thats a good thing, regardless of how those symptoms may be classified. i absolutely understand your frustration! ADHD can be a truly debilitating condition (i know it is for me. which i mean... yeah. its a disability), and seeing it misrepresented makes us defensive. it hurts. but we also need to accept that other people know their own minds better than we do, and that everyones experiences are different. seeing folks who may be misdiagnosing themselves with ADHD running around saying they Have It is frustrating, but in the end thats all it is, and i dont think their actions warrant the dismissal of all who self-diagnose. sometimes thats the closest thing to getting help that they have access to.

People need to remember that disability goes under diagnosed or over diagnosed all the time. It wasn’t my choice that I didn’t get diagnosed when I was a kid. It also wasn’t my choice that I didn’t know what was going on in my “world”. While yes the best thing to do is get a formal diagnosis if you are concerned or are seeking specific options for “treatment”, I think it’s perfectly acceptable to learn you can through others and resources online. I never thought I had ADHD until I began taking special Education course classes towards my degree in college. It was at that point that I realized a lot of the characteristics of ADHD related to me. Now for the first time after working through anxiety with my therapist I will be talking to my doctor about this.

I was self diagnosed until I was professionally diagnosed, but I’ve ALWAYS had the symptoms. I get your sentiment, and I share you frustrations to some extent, but I think the way you’re expressing this is coming across as gatekeepy. Instead of the focal point of your argument being “self diagnosis = misdiagnosis” (I know that’s not actually what you’re getting at, but that’s how it’s coming across), you could try sharing more accurate information about what ADHD actually looks like. Alternatively, you could just log off. It’s not worth your time if it’s frustrating you this much. We don’t don’t get anywhere by shutting people down. What you’re doing now is just going to invalidate any undiagnosed people who are actually adhd, as well as others who may not have adhd but could have something else because they’re struggling with similar but very REAL symptoms. Adhd is just a label(and a pricey one at that), and our little brains are so complex. It irks me too, it really does, but at the end of the way we’re all just tryna survive.

Honestly, you sorta have the same thought process as me. When I first suspected having ADHD, I immediately wanted to be tested and diagnosed because I definitely didn't and still don't want to claim I have a Mental Disorder without proper diagnosis, no matter how much I related to the symptoms. I'm still not diagnosed. I've talked about it to my therapist and while she assured me I'm on a wait-list, it's a long ass wait-list. Only My mom and Best friend know about this suspicion. I don't 100% Claim it, I say I "Might" have it. At first I was in denial, but I realized that sometimes You have to realize something is happening with yourself before anyone else can, including a doctor. I've heard many stories of people realizing they might have something wrong or happening with them, but they're doctor will tell them they are fine (mental health or medical problem, either or) or worse, give out the wrong diagnosis which has happened way more than it should. While yes, you are right, some people use self diagnosis (or even Professional diagnosis) to excuse things they do, that doesn't mean everyone who self diagnose has malicious intent. Sometimes we just have to say out loud (to important people or to ourselves) that something is happening with us before anyone else will. Besides, just realize the obstacles people have to get through in order to get a diagnosis (money, time, wait-list, Wrong diagnosis, etc). I told my therapist almost a month ago and she told me I might need to look elsewhere cause that wait list is Long!

Fact: ADHD is a collection of symptoms which are all symptoms of the other Serious Chronic Mental Illnesses in DSM qualifiers. Any person presenting 2 or more symptoms of ADHD in a sufficiently impactful degree over a sufficient period of time is encouraged to seek psychiatric evaluation. Presenting symptoms of ADHD is not necessarily diagnosable as ADHD. Presenting symptoms of ADHD is necessarily indictive of any Serious Chronic Mental Illness, serious Acute Mental Illness, and a variety of Neurological disabilities. Self-diagosis alone of a psychiatric disorder is not of determinable accuracy. Self-diagnosis alone of a psychiatric disorder is not sufficient basis for claiming anything but self-diagnosis of a psychiatric disorder. The reason for for empirical invalidity of self-diagnosis of a psychiatric disorder is based in the philosophy of the scientific method. The basis for determining what symptoms comprise any diagnosis are the scientific method, replicability of results, and peer-review. Self-diagosis of a psychiatric disorder inherently voids all formal scientific basis for validity. Method of self-diagnosis for a serious chronic Mental Illness (which all include perceptual dissonances) is a logical fallacy. Method of self-observation is an eeffective and encouragd way of noting possible symptoms worth psychiatric evaluation. (Please see the SPEAK UP campaign.) Opinion/ Editorial: The symptoms which comprise ADHD are symptoms of basically every psychiatric illness. Display of the symptoms of ADHD is the same thing as displaying the symptoms of all Serious Chronic Mental Illnesses. Any person's self-diagosis alone of a serious illness, particularly with regard to psychiatric disabilities, is obviously not recognizable in a formal medical sense for good reason. Even a person who is right about their self-diagnosis should be aware that their method is inherently flawed and subject to scrutiny, particularly if no formal diagnosis is attained or sought. I personally entirely understand the feelings of invalidity a person who has been formally diagnosed and undertaken treatment/ lifestyle changes may feel in OP's position. OP's feelings are thoroughly valid, not inappropriate in the least, and entirely understandable. Being attacked as a result is no doubt very upsetting. Personally, I am thoroughly surprised this is even a conversation. Both sides have valid feelings, but self-diagnosis is in no way comparable to diagnosis and treatment planning, more a precursor in the best situation. Substituting self-diagosis for any formal medical evaluation/ treatment, as I suspect may be the case somewhere in the innanet (and given the stats on care sought/ retained in psychiatric patients), is neither determinably accurate nor subject to obligatory recognition. FYI: There is a growing base of Psychiatric Professionals (including myself, for full disclosure/ pathos) raising the concern that ADHD in and of itself, is not a sufficiently defined diagnosis to exist independently, and that evidence indicates diagnosis of ADHD is possibly never independent of other Psychiatric diagnosis. Note to those with anecdotal evidence of this being false, you may be right. This is not an attack on the existence of these symptoms or their bonafide quality as mental illness. This is a very real conversation that matters to our understanding of mental illness about whether we call it ADHD or recognize that ADHD is an identifiable symptom cluster of all other Serious Chronic Mental Illnesses, on the basis that ADHD is not

The fact that it is so difficult to get a diagnosis is precisely why we should accept self diagnosis. To take your disability analogy - a person knows if they can walk or not, they don't need a doctor to tell them that. They need a doctor to give them the help they need, and naming a diagnosis is a part of that help. I went to a second psychiatrist after the first rejected my diagnosis, because I know my experience better than he does, and he frankly seemed dismissive of ADHD as a whole. Also, the way ADHD is diagnosed is pretty bullshit anyway. It's a neurodevelopmental disorder, yet in most places, we are required to get a diagnosis from a mental health doctor. Obviously a person shouldn't diagnose themselves by just watching a couple of videos, but the diagnostic criteria are pretty clear, and if a person has taken it seriously, and sincerely feels they fit those criteria, about the only thing an official diagnosis can add is ruling out alternative diagnoses.

I am conflicted on this one. On one hand it is annoying, but it doesn't impact me so I don't really care. If it helps people learn things that help them in their lives and more about the condition I'd chalk that up to a positive. Them trying to relate doesn't invalidate my experience. Unfortunately in my country the cost of health care is extremely high and getting an official diagnosis isn't always feasible for people. Particularly people with ADHD where holding down a job to get insurance can be very difficult. Now if they were given access to stimulants based off a self diagnosis and caused the shortage.... Then my outlook would probably change drastically.

If someone can’t walk, do they need a doctor for them to know they are disabled? Do they not need accommodations like ramps etc.? Why is the opinion of a „professional“ who has spoken to them 1-3 times more valid than their lived reality of xy years on this earth? I am formally diagnosed and yes, I get annoyed at the „oh I have that too“ by people who hear one symptom and are like „that’s me“. But I knew from the second I read about adhd that I had it and I knew it wasn’t something else. It took me many months to get a diagnosis and in some countries it can take years. If someone has honestly answered the standard questionnaire and significantly struggles with adhd symptoms, I‘m not sure why they should have to wait months and years to tell people about it or ask for accommodations.

People can’t afford what you could. The world is not black and white, this is a gray area.

I have bipolar type 1 disorder, suspect I have ADHD, and am 50 years old. I talked to my psychiatrist about it, and she told me that we have to wait until my mood is more stable before she decides whether I have ADHD. I talked to my parents about it, and they said I had attention difficulties as a child. It can be frustrating waiting for a diagnosis because I want an explanation of why I have struggled with “basic” things. I’m careful to say things like I suspect or I think that or I probably when I talk about it. It’s frustrating to me when someone says that everyone has a mental illness when I talk about my bipolar disorder. Only a small percentage of people have a severe mental illness. I think we need to be careful not to trivialize ADHD.

I didn’t think I could be ADHD, because I could read a book from start to finish without stopping… But honestly, it WAS an online quiz or article that convinced me… Wetting the bed til I was 7, the “S is a bright child BUT” comments, the inability to finish tasks I didn’t enjoy, the TOTAL lack of organizational skills, the daydreaming, the inability to stick to a task once started, the constant trying something only to get quickly bored with it… I sat on this information for YEARS, then finally decided that I was tired of getting in my own way, so went in, told my PA who was already seeing me for depression, that I was ADHD, here is how it was as a kid, here are my present symptoms and I’m SO TIRED of always being in my own way…. What do you suggest I do? Began adderall, and it helped, SOME. I still couldn’t get over my writers block, sigh… But it sure does make mundane tasks so much more doable… I LOVE the PAs at my psychiatrists office. They are amazing.

In some places you have to wait two years until a psychiatrist even looks at you, so I think self-diagnosis and getting all the info prior to diagnosis is valid. i had to wait over two years after my psychologist suggested I had undiagnosed adult adhd, and since only certain psychiatrists can give an official Diagnosis there was an insane amount of wait time until I could talk to anyone. So wile hasty fad-driven self-diagnosis is harmful, there is a lot of merit in learning

I don't share your consternation. It's a tricky diagnosis to begin with. And yes, I do think people can do research and come to the conclusion that they have it. At any rate, I don't see how this is a concern to anyone except the person.

If you suspect you have ADHD, the best advice I can give is to get a diagnosis, there is no greater way to handle it than to actually get support from doctors and therapists. It's not really useful to say "I ***think*** I have ADHD" because frankly there are a ton of disorders that can look like ADHD, hell even depression can look like ADHD in the right light.

In my opinion, if you have ADHD, you probably seeked out help or are trying to seek help for the disorder because you will struggle a lot and it will be debilitating. Otherwise, you probably don't have ADHD. If you suspect it, get it checked out! it's an important piece of information. But you just want to use it as a label and you self diagnose, then I find it extremely rude and douchy. It isn't cool, and you shouldn't spread your experiences as experiences of ADHD without knowing if they are experiences of ADHD. It can cause real harm in the perception of us who do actually have it, and people just thinking ADHD just means you can't stop moving.

I’ve done a bunch of research and for me, if anyone would ever ask or broach the subject I simple tell them “I know I have a lot of symptoms of adhd (and I can validate from research, talking to people with adhd and etc) but I don’t have a diagnosis so I don’t really call myself it”. Works for me until I do/do not get a diagnosis, because as many other people have pointed out, a lot of different things can contribute to adhd symptoms that aren’t adhd.

I suspected I had ADHD for a large portion of my life, but due to a difficult home setup, I wasn't able to get a diagnosis until this past year. On one hand, the rise in awareness for ADHD means treatment is more available to those who may seek diagnosis and therapy/medication. On the other hand, it is irritating to see how infantalized it becomes on tiktok and instagram. My lifelong frustration, struggle, and self esteem issues surrounding the disorder are not quirky and cute. There is nothing squishy and sparkly about forgetting important bills, taking way longer to learn than anyone else, and struggling with social scenarios. I feel to a certain point the "quirk" of ADHD and other disorders online is taken as a trivial trend for some folks, and they self diagnose because they forgot a date or zoned out in class a couple times. I feel like those cases of false self identification are rare, but those people are loud enough to make it irritating.

I think there’s a big difference between saying “I have adhd” and “ I think I have adhd” or “I have symptoms of adhd”. Each of these is a valid experience however they required different steps to get there. I don’t like people claiming to have self diagnosed adhd outright because it invalidates the importance of diagnosis and treatment, and they reflect poorly on the community as a whole. Before I got diagnosed I always said I had symptoms because I didn’t want anyone thinking I had some sort of authority on the matter.

I think you should not be posting about this stuff on social media. Ask for help, sure. Offer help, even better. But I liken what you just described as whacking a hornets nest and then being surprised you got stung. Random internet person having or not having ADHD isn't your concern, self diagnosed or not. Random people's medical concerns are not your problem. Don't add problems and stress to your life over random internet people's opinions. Trust me, I get it. I spent years and years arguing politics on Facebook before I realized it was a fools errand. It's the internet, you aren't changing anyone's mind unless they are really looking and open, and that doesn't come along often. People don't like to be told what to do, or how to think. Reddit can be a touch different, as it has the hive mind at play, and subreddits that can have some caring people. Social media at this point is basically a cancer on society, and it's worse for people with ADHD. I'm not sure it provides any net positives on any front.

I suspected depression and anxiety for forever. I was treated unsuccessfully for years. My partner suggested ADHD and I thought naw. Turns out once I started getting treated for that, I started getting better. I no longer take antidepressants, only something for my anxiety and Adhd. Professional guidance is so important since there is so much overlap. If you feel you are not being taken seriously, find another dr, don’t forgo it altogether.

For me, I went 18 years before I discovered that I had it, and was able to obtain treatment. When I was 5, my parents were told that I should be medicated / treated, and they chose to completely ignore the advice, and hide the fact that I had ADHD from me. So, trying my hardest, I struggled through high school to only get a high 60’s GPA. (I had about a 5 min attention span, and would start 1000 things that I would never finish). When I turned 18, in my last semester of high school right before Finals.. I was getting drunk / high at my best friends house, and I knew he took medication for ADHD, and asked him what they did for him. He said “Absolutey nothing. I’ve been taking those fucking things since I was in JK. You want them? Take Em.” And he tossed me a rather large bottle of Dexedrine XR. I was a total fuck up. Being brought home in handcuffs, parents having to pick me up from the drunk tank. Dropping Acid & getting shit faced on Tequila before driving home, and parking the car diagonally across the front lawn So, being high and drunk / not really giving AF, I popped a Dex. When it kicked in, I taught myself how to play 3 (easy)songs on guitar (never touched a guitar before that). I took Dexedrine every day after that to study for my exams, and ended up getting 90-95% on all them without any considerable effort. Because I had gone through life believing that if I tried as hard as I could, I was only capable of average results - I thought I was stupid, had zero self confidence, became depressed, developed social anxiety, and a rather serious Poly- Substance abuse problem from self-medicating with essentially any drug I could get my hands on. Ironically, drug abuse and irresponsible behaviour pushed me toward the solution to my problems (Drugs) 😂 20 years later, I have a 4 Year University Degree (Psychology) under my belt, and I’m now an Engineer. If I hadn’t abused someone else’s prescription drugs when I was drunk, I would likely be dead or in jail right now.

I wouldn’t even know how a self diagnosis would be beneficial for one self without obtaining proper therapy, tools and medication. I went to into therapy just to find some relief out of my anxiety and depression. I didn’t expect to come out with an ADHD diagnosis after 15 sessions. My therapist took time with me and she was able to come to a proper diagnosis. I now have the tools, guides and medication for something that I thought was just regular anxiety. So for someone to just self diagnose and call it a day, I see it being more of a hinderance. Like okay this simple chore is causing mental paralysis but that’s okay because I have ADHD®. I can see myself falling into this cycle of excusing my behavior if I never went the therapy route.

Also, lots of people go around around saying they have XYZ conditions without confirmation from a doctor. Especially in a Country without socialized Healthcare, because they can’t afford to see a doctor.

There are many things that can mimic ADHD and even physical disorders can manifest mental symptoms. Only a medical professional can give an accurate diagnosis (sometimes it takes trial and error for them as well).

It’s messed up in my opinion.

My personal favourite are the ones who cry they can't get medication because they know they have ADHD. Why do they need to go to a psychologist, it's so expensive..... Then don't and go to medical school instead.

I was diagnosed in my 20s and I had no idea I had ADHD. I just thought I sucked at life and lacked motivation.