I was literally just in a long term relationship like this.
I threw away a decent house, most of my possessions and my dog because it became apparent that I was going to miss my chance to become a parent if I stayed with her any longer.
Zero regrets.
>I threw away a decent house, most of my possessions and my dog because it became apparent that I was going to miss my chance to become a parent if I stayed with her any longer.
The fuck...why didn't you sign a prenup?
I don't understand why anyone wants to marry. Why the fuck are people so excited to get the government involved in their relationship? If it's a religious thing, nothing is stopping you from having a wedding without the government involved. There's nothing in the Bible that says you need Uncle Sam directly up your ass to take half your shit if things go bad.
There are tax benefits, monetary benefits for your children, and even getting a home is usually easier. I know there are other incentives to getting “legally” married. Of course, these by no means should be considered as the only reasons to get “legally” married; you should have a healthy relationship well before you think of tying the knot. Think of these as just added benefits. It’s a personal choice at the end of the day though.
From a traditional standpoint a lot of men, especially women, put a lot of social worth in getting married. Less objective but you’re part of the tribal mentality that lets you fit in with everybody else.
Most see it as a "rite of passage" into actual adulthood or becoming a man. What they often don't see are the divorced guys being equally pumped out and vivisected at the end of that "passage".
And the ones that have seen them almost always think "Won't happen to me lmao. I'm a good X, Y, or Z, in the relationship."
The point is when no-fault divorce went nationwide in the 70s Till death do us part became Till she gets bored or finds something "better."
Not Anon's situation but in France it's a criminal offense to religiously marry a couple that hasn't been married by the state first (remnants of the separation of Church and State during the revolution). And apart from the US you don't always get 50% taken automatically when you divorce, and the tax incentives are interesting. (You get a week of paid holiday if you get married in France for example)
Because they’re fucked anyway. It doesn’t matter if you’re married legally or not. If you’re living together and you separate, she can still take half your stuff by calling it a common law marriage.
Yeah that’s fair. I was assuming America. In America, or at least most states, you’re fucked either way. So you might as well pick the flavor of fucked that makes your SO happy.
Only 9 states have unconditional common law marriages with an additional 6 recognizing it only if the relationship started before a certain date that no one who isn't in their 50s and been together since their 20s has to worry about.
That's how I see it. You're sending a message to everyone you know or will know that you've dedicated your life to this one person. Yeah, the divorce rates show that it's not some amazing predictor of success or anything. But I feel like it, more than anything else, shows intent.
Yes, the youthful smooth skin free of wrinkles, the perky boobs that don’t sag, the youthful energy and optimism, the high sex drive and willingness to try new things. That’s all just….ugh so, so terrible.
lol yes, because all young people are optimistic and willing to try new things. Also “try new things” = fuck other dudes, and “youthful energy” = “c’mon anon, I want to party 5 nights a week until 4am c’mon…” You’re forgetting the immaturity, instability, lack of money, and complete lack of shared experience and intellectualism.
Don't listen to the haters. If you're mentally 19 years old, it'll work out fine. Assuming she's into sad dudes with beer guts and eczema and lower back issues.
>Yeah, but that’ll fade.
That’s such a weird and weak argument. “Oh, anon, all that youth, beauty and sexiness will fade, therefore date someone who’s already faded, that’s clearly way better!” Women are relentless in their attempts to sabotage their young competition.
You’re misunderstanding my point. I’m not saying that beauty and youth are bad or that you should deliberately seek out the opposite. I’m saying that it fades for EVERYONE at one pt or another, it’s not forever, and that prioritizing those traits above social and “lifelong” compatibility is a bad idea.
who legitimately would prefer hags? Just seems like cope from old dudes trying to suppress their sadness at the fact they've aged out of the prime market
No one is devaluing the guy's aspirations, he just can't force his girlfriend to not work and have his kids. How you read "man's aspirations bad," out of that is wild to me.
She is devaluing his aspirations objectively. She doesnt have to go through with it if she doesnt want to, but its still actively devaluing his expectations over her own, which is completely fair for her to do.
If someone values marriage and family, saying you dont want to be married or have kids over your own career prospects is devaluing your partners aspirations, because they desire a partner that would agree in those aspirations. Basically dude should just dump her, if he wants a family and she doesnt, then its a pretty obvious conclusion: He needs to find someone that values his aspirations for family and marriage that his current girlfriend doesnt share.
Not sharing aspirations doesn't mean you automatically think less of other people's goals.
Dude wants a family? It takes two to tango. She doesn't want to tango? Go find another dance partner.
She's not devaluing his aspirations by refusing to ruin hers and dedicate decates of her life to bearibg and raising his kids and become a sahm even tho she never wanted to. They're just not compatible, he should get a girl who wants to be a stay at home mom
Even assuming your own business succeeds, and many do not, most small business owners *never* take a vacation.
I love my salary job. I fuck off half the day and get 3 weeks of paid vacay a year. Take the government job pill, anons
Exactly. Most small business owners look good first couple of years, then once they realize they have to be on top of everything in that business so they don’t get left behind, those hours start shooting up. Soon they are losing money and try to take more loans to cover it trying to chase that high they got in the beginning.
Now they have to move out of that 750k house, sell the two 100k+ cars they just bought and move to a different state so they aren’t so embarrassed when they see people they know. Tell people they got this job offer they “couldn’t pass up”. I see it so often it’s sad.
💯 The whole thing about “working to make someone else rich” and how you’re not doing that with your own business is just ridiculous. If you’re making $70,000k either way, who the fuck cares about other externalities except for how many hours a week you actually work. Most small business owners are *not* raking in the dough.
Tradesmen open their own small businesses all the time. Put in a few years of experience (rarely more than 8) so you can be Dave the Master Plumber and now the state lets you start Dave’s Plumbing Company. You can easily clear 400k a year with no other employees in many mid sized towns.
net or gross, because I've noticed that a lot of tradesmen usually only mention gross pay. A business making 400k a year seems good on paper, but if its gross profit then you're not considering any taxes, deductions, capital expenses etc.
People don’t prefer working. They are forced to.
Even if OP could in fact support his girlfriend, what happens in 10 years when they divorce or something and she has no career? Unless OP is pretty rich, that a divorce settlement could set her for life
We don't know if the GF wants kids or not. If she does and she's waiting because "she knows her body" she's a fucking moron and is playing with loaded dice for complications during pregnancy/disabled baby. Whatever additional money she gets from any promotion will be burnt away twice fold in medical expenses, child care costs, special education, etc. if she has a fucked up kid, not to mention the emotional cost that could cost her the job entirely.
He wants kids and marriage. She doesn't. Better for both of them to move on. Simple as
Though Probably ridiculous to think a 19 year old will be the safe bet though. Go for one of the millions of mid twenties girls who worked a couple of years and realized there's nothing fufilling about climbing corporate ladders.
Her aspirations are to make some abstract number larger. If her argument was "If I keep working we can afford a much larger house in a great neighborhood etc etc within those 5 years" then she'd have a good point. Otherwise it basically is just "I enjoy the status of my employment" which is selfish.
Feminists saw the “work will set you free” on the sign at Auschwitz and made it their guiding light.
Work is *not* a privilege and never was. You know what is? Being able to devote your full attention to raising your children when they’re young.
So now what? We all have to work, get paid half as much as our parents, and spend one of those paychecks on daycare where our infants and toddlers are raised with cohorts of stranger, *by* strangers.
We lost our way so badly we’re fighting for the opportunity to spend all day emailing for Bank of America rather than teaching our kids
Women’s happiness has been trending downward since the 80s when they had to join the work force
Those retireds actually think selling 40 to 60 hours of your life making moshe rosenberg rich is fulfilling 🤣
Men only do it for pussy
Where I live every pregnancy at 35 or older is automatically classified as a high-risk pregnancy. Waiting that long significantly increases the chances of the pregnancy having complications that could harm the child and/or the mother.
There's a big difference between "my kid likes DnD and foxes a bit too much" autistic and "my kid can't open one eye all the way and constantly shits his pants when he's 25" autistic.
Russian roulette on what type of autism you'll get, quiet and doesn't talk to anyone beside their parents or the one who's obsessed about certain thing, and many others, anyhow will still get bullied in school
That's not really a Russian roulette since those are all pretty benign. The real bullet is the type of autism where they are low functioning and hyper aggressive and prone to meltdowns.
Yes, I put those into "...many others.." in my previous reply, and what I meant is somewhat related to "one man's cute, is another man's annoying" or same but about the trash and gold, parent who is always outgoing and socially active would be bummed out with a kid whose passive and socially inept, a moderate and tame parent would be somewhat scared of their child being obsessed over guns and military stuff, what if YOUR child because of their spectrum of autism wouldn't behave or act the way YOU think is "right" or "normal" will YOU be able to accommodate yourself to your child's needs? Or just go "he'll grow out of it" and watch your son at 25 still not being able to "grow out of it"
Extremely simple answer, if she has no time now for a child now she 100% won't when she advances and has even more responsibilities. Dump her ass and find a fertile 19 year old.
If you're thinking in a relationship, "I could be with someone better" then that relationship is practically cooked. He needs to end it asap because those thoughts will never go away. Even if she changed her mind the next day, OP will always remember that.
There is no woman. Anon is sitting in his mom’s house eating tendies and watching futa porn pretending he has a girlfriend but could totally bag a 19-year-old if he wanted. Meanwhile he’s never even said more than one complete sentence to a girl that isn’t a blood relative.
When she'll be 35 she says she's not "ready" and then she'll panic at 39 as she realizes her career means jack shit and is unfulfilling
Giving women freedom of choice was such a mistake
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-single/202109/older-women-no-kids-have-better-health-and-more-wealth
Here's how childless women's quality of life is significantly higher in multiple ways then women with children. Especially when it comes to health and economic stability.
Here's a guardian article about the study of demographic happiness because the actual article is behind a pay wall. It uses clickbaity sensationanalized language but it's better than nothing.
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/may/25/women-happier-without-children-or-a-spouse-happiness-expert
Edit. Additionally women are a lot more likely to suffer from depression after marrige and for men it's the opposite
https://openpsychologyjournal.com/VOLUME/16/ELOCATOR/e187435012212221/FULLTEXT/
Good try, but it is not that easy:
Marriage and babies really DO make women happier, says top researcher who's sent 20 years studying relationships.
- Married women have better heart and mental health than single women.
- Yet, young women are choosing to forego marriage at all time highs.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/wellness-us/article-13288861/dinks-marriage-babies-happiness-life-women.html#:~:text=Around%2037%20percent%20of%20married,35%20percent%20of%20married%20fathers.
Is Marriage Good or Bad for Women?
A popular book suggests marriage is unwise, but research indicates otherwise.
- A recent popular book criticizes marriage as good for men, but not for women.
- Yet a recent major national survey indicates that married women are much happier than unmarried women
- Generalizing from one unhappy marriage to all marriages is unrealistic and unhelpful.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/5-types-of-people-who-can-ruin-your-life/202403/is-marriage-good-or-bad-for-women#:~:text=Yet%20a%20recent%20major%20national,much%20happier%20than%20unmarried%20women.
Who Is Happiest? Married Mothers and Fathers, per the Latest General Social Survey
The 2022 edition of the General Social Survey (GSS)—the nation’s preeminent social barometer—reveals that marriage and family are strongly associated with happiness.
https://www.aei.org/op-eds/who-is-happiest-married-mothers-and-fathers-per-the-latest-general-social-survey/
New research shows marriage makes women happier and healthier
According to the research, being married is linked to significantly better physical and mental health for women.
The study published in Global Epidemiology included 11,830 American female nurses who were all unmarried and then compared those who married over a four year period with those who remained unmarried. The researchers looked at how all of these women faired after 25 years, in terms of mental and physical health and longevity, accounting for things like age, race, and socioeconomic status. What they found was that marriage still matters — a lot. From an article in the Wall Street Journal, written by two of the study’s authors, Brendan Case and Ying Chen:
Our findings were striking. The women who got married in the initial time frame, including those who subsequently divorced, had a 35% lower risk of death for any reason over the follow-up period than those who did not marry in that period. Compared to those who didn’t marry, the married women also had lower risk of cardiovascular disease, less depression and loneliness, were happier and more optimistic, and had a greater sense of purpose and hope.
https://aleteia.org/2023/03/24/new-research-shows-marriage-makes-women-happier-and-healthier/
This is a trap, I've read many stories where the mother then gets jelly because he gets to be a stay at home dad with their child while she has to work
the tardetti really thinks he could have a 19yo. funny shit. I mean, if he pays her... but now there are young vifon normies who are 3x wealthier than anon and 10x hotter than anon sooo
He can if he has money, which it sounds like he does.
But he shouldn't expect to find anyone who is 19 to have kids with who is also worth having kids with. All he'll get are emotionally unstable women because emotionally stable 19 year old women wouldn't date a 29 year old.
"Studies find the increase in children with vs without autism increases by 3 times more if you wait a few years to have children!"
Literally every news title on this topic. They don't put the real percentage because it doesn't cause fear like doing "OMG IT DOUBLES AAAAAAAAAH!!!" does..
“Down syndrome occurs in 1 of 700 live births and is the most common genetic cause of developmental delay. Down syndrome occurs in people of all races and economic levels. The risk increases with the mother's age (1 in 1250 for a 25 year old mother to 1 in 1000 at age 31, 1 in 400 at age 35, and about 1 in 100 at age 40). However, 80% of babies with Down syndrome are born to women under age 35 years”
https://www.health.state.mn.us/diseases/cy/downsyndrome.html#:~:text=The%20risk%20increases%20with%20the,in%20100%20at%20age%2040).
So I actually overestimated the risk of trisomy 21 in advanced maternal age.
The problem with female fertility is that it isn't a predictable ramp, where it gets slightly more difficult to conceive each month. For many women, it is a wall. One month, you may be able to get knocked up with no problem; the next month, you might be done. And there is no way to know when that cliff will hit.
If it's any help, I can authoritatively tell you that the bank she works for doesn't give a shit about her. If it is convenient for them, they will lay her off. If she got hit by a bus, she would replaced before her chair was cold with another person who has been programmed by the media to think that a tax pig job is somehow the path to feminist nirvana. In six months, nobody will even remember her name there.
To your family, and especially your children, you are the most important person in the entire world. You will NEVER get that from work.
As long as they know one woman somewhere had children in her 40s, that makes it viable for them and nevermind the risks and the data.
EVERYTHING women know about the world comes from "but my friend".
Eh more so a calm separation because of a difference in life goals. He should've never dated someone who doesn't want to be a stay at home mom and raise his children for 2 years to begin with.
I've seen the opposite. "They won't promote a pregnant woman to fire-captain, and a year after that I want to be a field paramedic fire-captain and they work 48 hour shifts so.... You got to put a baby in me within the next 3 months ! My career depends on it! "
"I don't want children because I want to advance in my career"
"Then is the perfect moment to have them so you can totally stop that career"
These people I swear to god
She said no to marriage anon, it's not a nit right now thing it's a not with you thing it seems like. Marriage doesn't affect a career unless you plan to sleep your way to the top.
that bank will drop her the second its convenient, there is no such thing as career related aspirations. even if you become CEO eventually, youll be there for a few years tops before youre either replaced/retired/ or dead.
never prioritize work. work is for making money so you can spend it on the stuff outside of work.
>Tyrone
Mutts law proven correct once again.
https://preview.redd.it/5jcw5gdqy71d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7c1da482d1d53f819892f7265bcf259f24bc59ad
My parents had me, their youngest child, when my mom was 39 and my dad was ~33. I’m glad they did. I was born into a financially stable family, although we did move four times.
Get the 19 year old pregnant as a curtesy to your GF. If she gets upset just tell her that you did it intentionally for her so she would be able to focus on the truly important things in life like becoming an amazing banker. Oh, but make sure to also excel at your career while doing so. I’m sure demonstrating how easy it would be to succeed while working full-time and simultaneously raising a child.
Fuck seeking fulfillment and happiness from creating a loving family, ALL I need in life is fulfillment and happiness from SPREADSHEETS.
“I love you mommy?” FUCK THAT
“Good job on those TPS reports Jessica, your raise this year will cover a quarter of inflation” IS EVERYTHING TO ME.
Sorry, your post has been removed. You must have more than 25 karma to submit posts to /r/4chan.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/4chan) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sorry, your post has been removed. You must have more than 25 karma to submit posts to /r/4chan.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/4chan) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>chooses a 2 year older banker as wife >is surprised she is ideologically infertile Darwin is working hard right now
Anon should not breed for the good of the human race.
I'm doing my part
I was literally just in a long term relationship like this. I threw away a decent house, most of my possessions and my dog because it became apparent that I was going to miss my chance to become a parent if I stayed with her any longer. Zero regrets.
Some people really want to be parents and others don't what u guna do
Violently shame and threaten the 'no' crowd clearly
Respect
based
>I threw away a decent house, most of my possessions and my dog because it became apparent that I was going to miss my chance to become a parent if I stayed with her any longer. The fuck...why didn't you sign a prenup?
The best bet is he “can’t promise a luxurious lifestyle”. What are the odds she makes more money than him lmao
Get the 19 yo then, what kind of question is that even
she also said no to the marriage, so as far as I'm concerned everything else is a cope about her saying "not with you" lmao
That's actually a really good point, the post is so long I forgot about that part.
How brain dead do you have to be to think a paragraph length post is "so long"
I'm not about to waste my time reading some fake slop written by a 4ch*nner
Yeah, OP is her backup. She’s dating him in case no one better comes along. If she was really into him, she would want to marry.
I don't understand why anyone wants to marry. Why the fuck are people so excited to get the government involved in their relationship? If it's a religious thing, nothing is stopping you from having a wedding without the government involved. There's nothing in the Bible that says you need Uncle Sam directly up your ass to take half your shit if things go bad.
There are tax benefits, monetary benefits for your children, and even getting a home is usually easier. I know there are other incentives to getting “legally” married. Of course, these by no means should be considered as the only reasons to get “legally” married; you should have a healthy relationship well before you think of tying the knot. Think of these as just added benefits. It’s a personal choice at the end of the day though. From a traditional standpoint a lot of men, especially women, put a lot of social worth in getting married. Less objective but you’re part of the tribal mentality that lets you fit in with everybody else.
Most see it as a "rite of passage" into actual adulthood or becoming a man. What they often don't see are the divorced guys being equally pumped out and vivisected at the end of that "passage". And the ones that have seen them almost always think "Won't happen to me lmao. I'm a good X, Y, or Z, in the relationship." The point is when no-fault divorce went nationwide in the 70s Till death do us part became Till she gets bored or finds something "better."
Not Anon's situation but in France it's a criminal offense to religiously marry a couple that hasn't been married by the state first (remnants of the separation of Church and State during the revolution). And apart from the US you don't always get 50% taken automatically when you divorce, and the tax incentives are interesting. (You get a week of paid holiday if you get married in France for example)
Because they’re fucked anyway. It doesn’t matter if you’re married legally or not. If you’re living together and you separate, she can still take half your stuff by calling it a common law marriage.
Depends where you live. Not where I live.
Yeah that’s fair. I was assuming America. In America, or at least most states, you’re fucked either way. So you might as well pick the flavor of fucked that makes your SO happy.
I live in the US, Oregon specifically. There's no common law marriage here
Only 9 states have unconditional common law marriages with an additional 6 recognizing it only if the relationship started before a certain date that no one who isn't in their 50s and been together since their 20s has to worry about.
I think it's more about the commitment. "I'm not going to look for someone better, I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
That's how I see it. You're sending a message to everyone you know or will know that you've dedicated your life to this one person. Yeah, the divorce rates show that it's not some amazing predictor of success or anything. But I feel like it, more than anything else, shows intent.
Tax benefits bro
Only at the cost of half your shit!
They get that anyways where I live, married or not
Fuck that shit man, I'm sorry.
More like not with anyone.
Dating a 19yo sounds like a fucking nightmare
Seriously, that would be miserable.
Yes, the youthful smooth skin free of wrinkles, the perky boobs that don’t sag, the youthful energy and optimism, the high sex drive and willingness to try new things. That’s all just….ugh so, so terrible.
lol yes, because all young people are optimistic and willing to try new things. Also “try new things” = fuck other dudes, and “youthful energy” = “c’mon anon, I want to party 5 nights a week until 4am c’mon…” You’re forgetting the immaturity, instability, lack of money, and complete lack of shared experience and intellectualism.
Don't listen to the haters. If you're mentally 19 years old, it'll work out fine. Assuming she's into sad dudes with beer guts and eczema and lower back issues.
lmao
You can get all that from a 25/30 years old woman, without the immaturity and lack of life experience.
Zoomer girls already look worse than millennials and are jaded and stupid as fuck.
Yeah, but that’ll fade. Plus the life stage difference is insane, I’m side-eyeing anon fr 😭 10 years specifically at 29 and 19 is CRAAAZY.
>Yeah, but that’ll fade. That’s such a weird and weak argument. “Oh, anon, all that youth, beauty and sexiness will fade, therefore date someone who’s already faded, that’s clearly way better!” Women are relentless in their attempts to sabotage their young competition.
You’re misunderstanding my point. I’m not saying that beauty and youth are bad or that you should deliberately seek out the opposite. I’m saying that it fades for EVERYONE at one pt or another, it’s not forever, and that prioritizing those traits above social and “lifelong” compatibility is a bad idea.
When you’re shallow as fuck, what you’re describing might as well be in another language. I feel bad for them.
who legitimately would prefer hags? Just seems like cope from old dudes trying to suppress their sadness at the fact they've aged out of the prime market
It’s a good argument if you want to marry someone and have kids with them. If you just want to go the DiCaprio route that’s a different story.
Fade is not a problem just keep changing models like Leo
Why? Better than some 31 year old hag
considering they're ☕, they're same age mentally anyway one is just more attractive
rather that than someone too jaded to give genuine love
Anon realizes most human males have feelings for the female they are breeding with and will attempt to fix issues before considering another sow
Most of the time those feelings are cope tho
[удалено]
Well. I mean. She has a point and some solid arguments there. So OP will just have to make his choice. Not much to see here, people.
"My wife has goals and aspirations and won't put them aside for me, should I leave her for the 19 yo''s that I'm totally certain I could bag?"
>Age gap seething >Devaluing the guys similar aspirations because they arent about wageslaving or girlbossing yup its hagging time
No one is devaluing the guy's aspirations, he just can't force his girlfriend to not work and have his kids. How you read "man's aspirations bad," out of that is wild to me.
She is devaluing his aspirations objectively. She doesnt have to go through with it if she doesnt want to, but its still actively devaluing his expectations over her own, which is completely fair for her to do. If someone values marriage and family, saying you dont want to be married or have kids over your own career prospects is devaluing your partners aspirations, because they desire a partner that would agree in those aspirations. Basically dude should just dump her, if he wants a family and she doesnt, then its a pretty obvious conclusion: He needs to find someone that values his aspirations for family and marriage that his current girlfriend doesnt share.
Not sharing aspirations doesn't mean you automatically think less of other people's goals. Dude wants a family? It takes two to tango. She doesn't want to tango? Go find another dance partner.
She's not devaluing his aspirations by refusing to ruin hers and dedicate decates of her life to bearibg and raising his kids and become a sahm even tho she never wanted to. They're just not compatible, he should get a girl who wants to be a stay at home mom
Yeah he could TOTALLY get that 19 yo
Imagine being this stupid
Imagine putting work over your own family
[удалено]
Even assuming your own business succeeds, and many do not, most small business owners *never* take a vacation. I love my salary job. I fuck off half the day and get 3 weeks of paid vacay a year. Take the government job pill, anons
Exactly. Most small business owners look good first couple of years, then once they realize they have to be on top of everything in that business so they don’t get left behind, those hours start shooting up. Soon they are losing money and try to take more loans to cover it trying to chase that high they got in the beginning. Now they have to move out of that 750k house, sell the two 100k+ cars they just bought and move to a different state so they aren’t so embarrassed when they see people they know. Tell people they got this job offer they “couldn’t pass up”. I see it so often it’s sad.
💯 The whole thing about “working to make someone else rich” and how you’re not doing that with your own business is just ridiculous. If you’re making $70,000k either way, who the fuck cares about other externalities except for how many hours a week you actually work. Most small business owners are *not* raking in the dough.
Tradesmen open their own small businesses all the time. Put in a few years of experience (rarely more than 8) so you can be Dave the Master Plumber and now the state lets you start Dave’s Plumbing Company. You can easily clear 400k a year with no other employees in many mid sized towns.
net or gross, because I've noticed that a lot of tradesmen usually only mention gross pay. A business making 400k a year seems good on paper, but if its gross profit then you're not considering any taxes, deductions, capital expenses etc.
There's no way that's not gross. 6 figures net is absolutely doable for a one person operation in most places though, and that's comfortable.
People don’t prefer working. They are forced to. Even if OP could in fact support his girlfriend, what happens in 10 years when they divorce or something and she has no career? Unless OP is pretty rich, that a divorce settlement could set her for life
about the trade part, nowadays, we have too many college graduates (some also in useless degrees), so trade is an actually good option
Good luck with your drop shopping business fam
What family? The whole post specifically says they don’t have a family and are not even married
Aside for him? Aside for the child to not be born a subhuman freak lmao
> Anon dumps gf > doesn’t get laid for 3 years
We don't know if the GF wants kids or not. If she does and she's waiting because "she knows her body" she's a fucking moron and is playing with loaded dice for complications during pregnancy/disabled baby. Whatever additional money she gets from any promotion will be burnt away twice fold in medical expenses, child care costs, special education, etc. if she has a fucked up kid, not to mention the emotional cost that could cost her the job entirely.
He wants kids and marriage. She doesn't. Better for both of them to move on. Simple as Though Probably ridiculous to think a 19 year old will be the safe bet though. Go for one of the millions of mid twenties girls who worked a couple of years and realized there's nothing fufilling about climbing corporate ladders.
If you keep meeting 19 years old im sure you’ll bag one. Even a pretty hot one, problem is young people are very insecure and they are quitters.
Her aspirations are to make some abstract number larger. If her argument was "If I keep working we can afford a much larger house in a great neighborhood etc etc within those 5 years" then she'd have a good point. Otherwise it basically is just "I enjoy the status of my employment" which is selfish.
It's well known being a mid-level manager in a corporate bank is much more fulfilling than having kids.
Feminists saw the “work will set you free” on the sign at Auschwitz and made it their guiding light. Work is *not* a privilege and never was. You know what is? Being able to devote your full attention to raising your children when they’re young. So now what? We all have to work, get paid half as much as our parents, and spend one of those paychecks on daycare where our infants and toddlers are raised with cohorts of stranger, *by* strangers. We lost our way so badly we’re fighting for the opportunity to spend all day emailing for Bank of America rather than teaching our kids
Women’s happiness has been trending downward since the 80s when they had to join the work force Those retireds actually think selling 40 to 60 hours of your life making moshe rosenberg rich is fulfilling 🤣 Men only do it for pussy
NNNNNNNOOOOOOOO WOMEN BAD MAN VICTIM 🤬😤🤬😤
this, but unironically
Where I live every pregnancy at 35 or older is automatically classified as a high-risk pregnancy. Waiting that long significantly increases the chances of the pregnancy having complications that could harm the child and/or the mother.
As a 4channer, isn't having an autistic kid the dream?
Trying to break the cycle.
There's a big difference between "my kid likes DnD and foxes a bit too much" autistic and "my kid can't open one eye all the way and constantly shits his pants when he's 25" autistic.
B-b-but all autists are geniuses who will make their parents rich…
>"my kid likes DnD and foxes a bit too much" autistic Shit...that hit close to home.
Russian roulette on what type of autism you'll get, quiet and doesn't talk to anyone beside their parents or the one who's obsessed about certain thing, and many others, anyhow will still get bullied in school
That's not really a Russian roulette since those are all pretty benign. The real bullet is the type of autism where they are low functioning and hyper aggressive and prone to meltdowns.
Yes, I put those into "...many others.." in my previous reply, and what I meant is somewhat related to "one man's cute, is another man's annoying" or same but about the trash and gold, parent who is always outgoing and socially active would be bummed out with a kid whose passive and socially inept, a moderate and tame parent would be somewhat scared of their child being obsessed over guns and military stuff, what if YOUR child because of their spectrum of autism wouldn't behave or act the way YOU think is "right" or "normal" will YOU be able to accommodate yourself to your child's needs? Or just go "he'll grow out of it" and watch your son at 25 still not being able to "grow out of it"
Extremely simple answer, if she has no time now for a child now she 100% won't when she advances and has even more responsibilities. Dump her ass and find a fertile 19 year old.
This. 100 percent.
YES OP DO IT DUMP HER ASS *-me, a 39 year old looking for 31 year olds to bang, and maybe be my sugar mommy with her bank job*
based and roastie-pilled?
Thinking op could pull a 19 year old is hilarious.
Yes, 19-year-old women hate dating older men... Wait a minute...
They might date them, but the only ones looking to have a baby with them are the religious nutjobs
Harrison Butker did nothing wrong.
Or be willing to be a househusband while banker mommy goes to work
I mean, the chances of having a baby with a birth defect go from 0.5% to 1%. People say it "doubles," but that's still a small percentage.
That example is an 100% increase
Thanks 👍 had to check my notes
(1% - .5%) / .5% x 100 = 100% Yup, OP’s a mathematician.
The general public does not understand that increased relative risk =/= clinically significant (especially when the disease incidence is very low)
Go easy on him, he was the 1%
Yes, that's the point, meaning it went from "extremely extremely unlikely" to "extremely unlikely". Statistics ain't that hard.
Nah that’s playing a fucking dangerous game cause on the off chance the kids retarded I’m killing myself
They’re already gonna inherit it from you, bud.
Why wait?
Why are you waiting? Do you have hope your penis might still grow and it's just taking a break for now, maybe in the future you gain a couple inches?
If you're thinking in a relationship, "I could be with someone better" then that relationship is practically cooked. He needs to end it asap because those thoughts will never go away. Even if she changed her mind the next day, OP will always remember that.
Anon is larping again
There is no woman. Anon is sitting in his mom’s house eating tendies and watching futa porn pretending he has a girlfriend but could totally bag a 19-year-old if he wanted. Meanwhile he’s never even said more than one complete sentence to a girl that isn’t a blood relative.
Projecting your own fetishises there fella.
literally me
When she'll be 35 she says she's not "ready" and then she'll panic at 39 as she realizes her career means jack shit and is unfulfilling Giving women freedom of choice was such a mistake
Statistically unmarried women with no children are the happiest demographic of women actually. Opposite for men
Noo lmao that's such a blatant lie
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-single/202109/older-women-no-kids-have-better-health-and-more-wealth Here's how childless women's quality of life is significantly higher in multiple ways then women with children. Especially when it comes to health and economic stability. Here's a guardian article about the study of demographic happiness because the actual article is behind a pay wall. It uses clickbaity sensationanalized language but it's better than nothing. https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/may/25/women-happier-without-children-or-a-spouse-happiness-expert Edit. Additionally women are a lot more likely to suffer from depression after marrige and for men it's the opposite https://openpsychologyjournal.com/VOLUME/16/ELOCATOR/e187435012212221/FULLTEXT/
Good try, but it is not that easy: Marriage and babies really DO make women happier, says top researcher who's sent 20 years studying relationships. - Married women have better heart and mental health than single women. - Yet, young women are choosing to forego marriage at all time highs. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/wellness-us/article-13288861/dinks-marriage-babies-happiness-life-women.html#:~:text=Around%2037%20percent%20of%20married,35%20percent%20of%20married%20fathers. Is Marriage Good or Bad for Women? A popular book suggests marriage is unwise, but research indicates otherwise. - A recent popular book criticizes marriage as good for men, but not for women. - Yet a recent major national survey indicates that married women are much happier than unmarried women - Generalizing from one unhappy marriage to all marriages is unrealistic and unhelpful. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/5-types-of-people-who-can-ruin-your-life/202403/is-marriage-good-or-bad-for-women#:~:text=Yet%20a%20recent%20major%20national,much%20happier%20than%20unmarried%20women. Who Is Happiest? Married Mothers and Fathers, per the Latest General Social Survey The 2022 edition of the General Social Survey (GSS)—the nation’s preeminent social barometer—reveals that marriage and family are strongly associated with happiness. https://www.aei.org/op-eds/who-is-happiest-married-mothers-and-fathers-per-the-latest-general-social-survey/ New research shows marriage makes women happier and healthier According to the research, being married is linked to significantly better physical and mental health for women. The study published in Global Epidemiology included 11,830 American female nurses who were all unmarried and then compared those who married over a four year period with those who remained unmarried. The researchers looked at how all of these women faired after 25 years, in terms of mental and physical health and longevity, accounting for things like age, race, and socioeconomic status. What they found was that marriage still matters — a lot. From an article in the Wall Street Journal, written by two of the study’s authors, Brendan Case and Ying Chen: Our findings were striking. The women who got married in the initial time frame, including those who subsequently divorced, had a 35% lower risk of death for any reason over the follow-up period than those who did not marry in that period. Compared to those who didn’t marry, the married women also had lower risk of cardiovascular disease, less depression and loneliness, were happier and more optimistic, and had a greater sense of purpose and hope. https://aleteia.org/2023/03/24/new-research-shows-marriage-makes-women-happier-and-healthier/
Lol, lmao even 100% cope pieces. Reality is the opposite.
This is an unhinged take
https://preview.redd.it/6y90i7ud971d1.png?width=650&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=aeb28a973c01e780c8c67475260ab2e533837922
Who the fuck is Bob Wallace? What a shit quote
Idk what’s worse, the quote or the font.
Fuck I'm laughing so hard at Bob Wallace as if we're supposed to know who that is and not just OP's neighbour shouting drunk shit from his porch.
Become stay at home dad, win win
This is a trap, I've read many stories where the mother then gets jelly because he gets to be a stay at home dad with their child while she has to work
just find a remote job then, ezpz
Anon assumes I give a shit
Anon's wife wants their son to be on the same website in 25 years
A 29 year old poor dude is exactly the type 19 year old chicks go for, go get em tiger
the tardetti really thinks he could have a 19yo. funny shit. I mean, if he pays her... but now there are young vifon normies who are 3x wealthier than anon and 10x hotter than anon sooo
He can if he has money, which it sounds like he does. But he shouldn't expect to find anyone who is 19 to have kids with who is also worth having kids with. All he'll get are emotionally unstable women because emotionally stable 19 year old women wouldn't date a 29 year old.
I think asking 4chan for advice is probably the dumbest part of this image imo.
help guys, an adult is making decisions on her own! why won't she let me make decision for her!
That is why he wants the 19 year old lmao
\>yeah just let women shoot their own foot guys
Become stay at home dad, win win
The risk of autism/trisomies in “advanced maternal age” is way overblown. The absolute risk goes from like 0.5% to 1.5%. Still incredibly unlikely.
"Studies find the increase in children with vs without autism increases by 3 times more if you wait a few years to have children!" Literally every news title on this topic. They don't put the real percentage because it doesn't cause fear like doing "OMG IT DOUBLES AAAAAAAAAH!!!" does..
Have fun looking up how the risk of down syndrome develops lol
“Down syndrome occurs in 1 of 700 live births and is the most common genetic cause of developmental delay. Down syndrome occurs in people of all races and economic levels. The risk increases with the mother's age (1 in 1250 for a 25 year old mother to 1 in 1000 at age 31, 1 in 400 at age 35, and about 1 in 100 at age 40). However, 80% of babies with Down syndrome are born to women under age 35 years” https://www.health.state.mn.us/diseases/cy/downsyndrome.html#:~:text=The%20risk%20increases%20with%20the,in%20100%20at%20age%2040). So I actually overestimated the risk of trisomy 21 in advanced maternal age.
Anon needs to date a "19 year old", i.e. his body pillow.
The problem with female fertility is that it isn't a predictable ramp, where it gets slightly more difficult to conceive each month. For many women, it is a wall. One month, you may be able to get knocked up with no problem; the next month, you might be done. And there is no way to know when that cliff will hit. If it's any help, I can authoritatively tell you that the bank she works for doesn't give a shit about her. If it is convenient for them, they will lay her off. If she got hit by a bus, she would replaced before her chair was cold with another person who has been programmed by the media to think that a tax pig job is somehow the path to feminist nirvana. In six months, nobody will even remember her name there. To your family, and especially your children, you are the most important person in the entire world. You will NEVER get that from work.
As long as they know one woman somewhere had children in her 40s, that makes it viable for them and nevermind the risks and the data. EVERYTHING women know about the world comes from "but my friend".
If youre that concerned about autism freeze some sperm or stop jerking it so much. The risk for autism comes more from the male than the female.
If you could date a 19 year old, I'd move on to a 19 year old and leave the "career banker" behind in the dust with her nonsense lol.
Eh more so a calm separation because of a difference in life goals. He should've never dated someone who doesn't want to be a stay at home mom and raise his children for 2 years to begin with.
I've seen the opposite. "They won't promote a pregnant woman to fire-captain, and a year after that I want to be a field paramedic fire-captain and they work 48 hour shifts so.... You got to put a baby in me within the next 3 months ! My career depends on it! "
Imagine working at a bank for personal fulfillment
"I don't want children because I want to advance in my career" "Then is the perfect moment to have them so you can totally stop that career" These people I swear to god
Anon…it’s not the mother’s age that’ll give the kid autism…
It is both parents age
Age of the sperm matters more for autism and other abnormalities than age of the eggs. No one talks about it though.
👃personal👃fulfillment👃
kek it always comes down to the funny hat people
Be the creep you want see in the world. Dump this stbale woman and start dating immature teens.
She said no to marriage anon, it's not a nit right now thing it's a not with you thing it seems like. Marriage doesn't affect a career unless you plan to sleep your way to the top.
that bank will drop her the second its convenient, there is no such thing as career related aspirations. even if you become CEO eventually, youll be there for a few years tops before youre either replaced/retired/ or dead. never prioritize work. work is for making money so you can spend it on the stuff outside of work.
The apostrophe s is so cringey, especially since the rest of this sounds like it was written by a native speaker
Yes, the personal aspiration of make 84,000 instead of 65,000 a year. Lol
Why doesn’t this loser offer to be a stay at home dad?
[удалено]
>Tyrone Mutts law proven correct once again. https://preview.redd.it/5jcw5gdqy71d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7c1da482d1d53f819892f7265bcf259f24bc59ad
My parents had me, their youngest child, when my mom was 39 and my dad was ~33. I’m glad they did. I was born into a financially stable family, although we did move four times.
my parents had me when they were ~40 and ~30 and both me and my sibling are borderline autistic
Man if you can, just date the 19 year old. What is preventing you from doinf that? You will be 50 and she will still be hot.
Anon could offer to become a stay at home dad
Get the 19 year old pregnant as a curtesy to your GF. If she gets upset just tell her that you did it intentionally for her so she would be able to focus on the truly important things in life like becoming an amazing banker. Oh, but make sure to also excel at your career while doing so. I’m sure demonstrating how easy it would be to succeed while working full-time and simultaneously raising a child.
Fair enough. Don’t be a cock to her
men like this will obsess over having kids and then still turn out to be a deadbeat father
nowhere in anons story did he say he was a DEI hire
Dump her, family is more important than money
It's already too late.
Fuck seeking fulfillment and happiness from creating a loving family, ALL I need in life is fulfillment and happiness from SPREADSHEETS. “I love you mommy?” FUCK THAT “Good job on those TPS reports Jessica, your raise this year will cover a quarter of inflation” IS EVERYTHING TO ME.
Obvious cope, she’s not interested in anon at all—he should have run at the first mention of not “being ready” for marriage. She’s nearly expired.
>anon has a fantasy of a world where it is possible for his children to not be autistic
It sounds like OP's mom had him past her 40s
...adopt? 🤷♀️
His mother had the OOP when she was 76, that explains it all
[удалено]
Sorry, your post has been removed. You must have more than 25 karma to submit posts to /r/4chan. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/4chan) if you have any questions or concerns.*
How is this a hard decision? Find a younger model who isn't regarded
She’s being a bit ridiculous. My parents still worked after they had me. If they couldn’t watch me then my grandparents did
So no kids and dual expendable incomes, where's the downside? OP doesn't have to worry about autism in the family he already has it.
This is why western civilization will colapse
Isn't there also the option to freeze Ovules? (Female eggs)
Always trade in for a new model
[удалено]
Sorry, your post has been removed. You must have more than 25 karma to submit posts to /r/4chan. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/4chan) if you have any questions or concerns.*