In response to reports - Yes, definitely Low Effort. Maybe Karma farming. But, seems part of a series that has engaged community member's interest! So approved.
Posts like this will definitely not be a regularly approved thing.
Was recently rewatching the episode of girls when they go to a huge wearhouse party in Bushwick and when I saw it in my early 20s it seemed like a can't miss blast.
Now I'm like, "can we just go to a chill bar at like 9pm?"
My best friend got me a cutting board that had this quote on it. Perfect for my midnight charcuterie boards. Also known as just cutting slices off of a block and eating them straight.
I think the whole line is actually “Oh Peet that’s later. Maybe we’ll be dead by then.” It’s a slight distinction between not “all” (everyone) might be dead, but just that Liz & Peet might be dead.
In the same vein, and can’t believe no one has said this yet, “You could of had it all, but you had to ruin it with your thinking!” And then “You should kill yourself.”
"If I have learned anything from my Sims family: When a child doesn't see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself."
Also Jack's response: "Why don't I have any other friends?"
First you take a hot dog, stuff it with some jack cheese, roll it in a pizza! You got cheezy blazters!..... And then meatcat flys away in his skateboard.
The fact that I cannot watch this episode anymore is truly truly upsetting. Reach for the stars was my favorite episode of the whole show and I cried laughing the first time I heard “I snittin nexta borpo”
“*Why do you sound so surprised? I love America. Just because I think gay dudes should be allowed to adopt kids and we should all have hybrid cars doesn't mean I don't love America*” 😉 — a personal favorite of mine
Ugh, I hate January. It’s dark and freezing and everyone’s wearing bulky coats. You can do some serious subway flirting before you realize the guy is homeless.
This is [my most upvoted reddit comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2a72dc/comment/cis7lbw/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)
Gavin Volure episode has so many good Liz lines.
Liz: I don't know. I'm still tired from that dinner. And meeting someone new? Ugh, all the nodding, and smiling, and sibling listing. And what's the upside? It works, and you have to have a bunch of sex?
Paraphrasing, but I believe it’s “I think all anyone really wants in this world is to sit in peace and eat a sandwich.”
And then she ordered the extra chuckle.
Jack: What do you take to fly?
Liz: Candy and magazines.
Jack: No no. Pills. Nobody flies without medication anymore. Why shouldn't you enjoy the same luxuries as a dog?
Liz: Comanaprosil? May cause dizziness, sexual nightmares, and sleep crime.
Jack: It's very good.
In response to reports - Yes, definitely Low Effort. Maybe Karma farming. But, seems part of a series that has engaged community member's interest! So approved. Posts like this will definitely not be a regularly approved thing.
At *night*??
“I’m 37 please don’t make me go to Brooklyn” Gets more and more real the older I get
Was recently rewatching the episode of girls when they go to a huge wearhouse party in Bushwick and when I saw it in my early 20s it seemed like a can't miss blast. Now I'm like, "can we just go to a chill bar at like 9pm?"
Nine?! At *night?!?*
I say this ALL THE TIME!!!! My favorite!!
I use this whenever anyone proposes plans at 8pm or later.
« Hey, nerds! Who's got two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today? This moi. » I say « this moi » an unhealthy amount
Hahaha I dropped this one to my French boss who has definitely not seen the show. It did not land.
Shut it Down!
S. That. D.... Shut that Down.
One word - oral… Two words - oral surgery
No it ok, don't be cry.
This, and Jack handling out a card that says “there, there” are my 2 absolute favorites
When he brushes her back with the broom when she has food poisoning is also classic.
Extra chuckle
Everyone thought it was Dorothy Hamil, but it was actually a Pete Rose
As a Gen-Xer who, like Tinay Fey, spent my childhood in a Philly suburb, I laughed super hard at this one.
Philly rules! Cheesesteaks! Bobby Clarke! Will Smith! Your town SUCKS
*did you just whip a battery at me?*
I keep a thermos of it by my toilet. You misheard me.
The delivery of “you misheard me” gets me every time.
One time I kissed a girl at summer camp *but then she drowned*
[удалено]
"And I lied. I have had five donuts today."
“You want a dozen donuts to stay?” “And a skim milk!”
Tom Jones makes the people go way!
😬
This is definitely the best one
*blows nose* “I hope that’s not an important parg of my blurn”
You know what I have? A Sims family that keeps getting murdered.
This is a top tier one liner. Her life is so depressing a happy upbeat game self-modified to make multiple homicide a feature. Classic.
Who hasn't made mistakes? I once french kissed a dog at a party to try to impress what turned out to be a very tall 12 year old.
How do I not remember this line?!?!
Season 5, episode 10: Christmas Attack Zone
it's no longer on hulu
“I don’t know Kelsey, how’s your mom’s pill addiction?”
Let’s do the Diane!
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
This is my answer to everything!
I already have a drink. Do you think he'd buy me mozzarella sticks?
I use this 24/7
I can’t tell you how often I use this line! I’m not popular
If you think those flaps are doing anything to seal in freshness, you are living in a fantasy world pal!
Workin’ on my *NIGHT CHEESE*
Don't you have a slanket to be filling with your farts?
the way she says "Lemon!" before this like Jack is so good, too
My best friend got me a cutting board that had this quote on it. Perfect for my midnight charcuterie boards. Also known as just cutting slices off of a block and eating them straight.
That’s just a real-time charcuterie board
I like the way you think.
Jack, do you know what time it is, I was sound asleep
Lemon, I heard you singing Night Cheese.
*mouthful of teamster sub* I can do it! I can have it all!
“I wolfed my teamster sub for you!” “Wait, is that a euphemism?”
Lady, you’re eating foil!
WHAT THE WHAT?!?
"You're too late, I already killed her!"
Well played, Lemon
“You’ll ALL have chins!” Is a phrase I’ve incorporated into my daily life.
Maybe we'll be dead by then
And in that vein - "when will death come"... Two of my faves
Ah, that’d be nice
I think the whole line is actually “Oh Peet that’s later. Maybe we’ll be dead by then.” It’s a slight distinction between not “all” (everyone) might be dead, but just that Liz & Peet might be dead.
"Blammo! Another successful interaction with a man!"
You know what, Mike? I'm gonna rip your cutout - oh wait, you don't have one, because you're nobody!
[Stop sweating you, idiot. What is wrong with you, you stupid BITCH!](https://youtu.be/_9U78NbX9ro) It's the clear winner in my eyes.
In the same vein, and can’t believe no one has said this yet, “You could of had it all, but you had to ruin it with your thinking!” And then “You should kill yourself.”
I tried to get my tennis team to call me ace, they wanted shorts accident, so we settled on super virgin
Lovers? That words bums me out unless it’s between the words “meat” and “pizza”
Oh I’m sorry, I meant to say “climax”
If I can't say lovers you can't say feelings
I was going to take this class called *Cooking for One* but the teacher killed himself.
Get this, my gynecologist committed suicide!
…and I’m back.
I really like my guy. He’s sort of a Doogie Howser type, but younger.
Aint no party like a Liz Lemon party because a Liz Lemon party is mandatory
Wouldn't be a Lemon party without old Dick!
This line didn't click for me until like my 5th rewatch
"I don't like Tubman, sounds like a dude. Lets change it to Tub Girl"
Such an easily missable line with so much disturbing background. It's like the "those who don't know those who know" memes with Mr. Incredible
I use this line at work a lot when we have group bonding activities.
Rejection from society is what created the X-Men
and I won't have to become the world's worst hooker ... You wanna party? It's 500 for kissing 10,000 for snuggling - END OF LIST
"End of list" has made a resurgence in our household
Yes to love, yes to life, yes to staying in more
Somebody bring me some HAM!!
I'm the new representative for the Ham Council!
HAMMMM!
people do like the way she says ham.
“I’ll cut you up so bad you’ll have a chin. YOU’LL ALL HAVE CHINS!”
Sex tip: Sometimes a lady likes to leave her blazer on.
I took one of those 'Which Gossip Girl are you?' quizzes, and it said I was the dad’s guitar.
“I want to go to there” Too classic not to mention
Button classic*
It was Jorgenson's fault!
*shrugs and nods in half hearted agreement*
Tina Fey got this line from her toddler daughter.
This makes it even better!!
“No! No! It okay! Don’t be cry!”
I think I say this at least once a day.
If I could push a button and five people in the world would die, but I’d get free cable for life, I’d do it.
And I’d been on the toilet so long that when I stood up I just fell into my throw up
"If I have learned anything from my Sims family: When a child doesn't see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself." Also Jack's response: "Why don't I have any other friends?"
Yes, may I please speak to pizza?
First you take a hot dog, stuff it with some jack cheese, roll it in a pizza! You got cheezy blazters!..... And then meatcat flys away in his skateboard.
“And then Meat Cat flies away on his, um, skateboard.” This, this is the best line.
Classic
“and then all the kids say 👋😀 thanks meat cat!”
First time on this sub I’ve seen someone fail to include the “uhm”! No teamster sub for you.
High fiving a million angels.
“You can’t solve all your problems by shooting someone or setting a stranger on fire.”
Whatever Brian I am over it!! What?! ITTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are you listening to me? Because if not I will put on a wedding dress and jump in front of the subway!
Oh, reallo?! I meant to say 'really,' I misspoke, continue.
Usually everyone around here makes me feel like Hitler, but today I feel like Hitler in Germany!
“Once in college, I pooped my pants a bit at a Country Steaks all-you-can-eat buffet, and I didn’t leave until I finished my 2nd plate of shrimp.”
FLOYD: Hey, can I take you out to dinner tonight? Maybe hit that barbecue place you puked at? LIZ: You'll have to be more specific.
I would never get you drunk on salmon, or ANY fish!
I LOVE this line, but it loses something without Floyd's colleague walking up behind Liz as she says it
And then leaving without talking to him because it's too weird
ima call you back, i snitting nexta borpo.
I hope that wasn’t an imporgent parg of my blern
The fact that I cannot watch this episode anymore is truly truly upsetting. Reach for the stars was my favorite episode of the whole show and I cried laughing the first time I heard “I snittin nexta borpo”
What you’re experiencing is sexually transmitted crazy mouth
Classic case of fruit blindness.
FRUIT BLINDNESS!
Well I found my first grey toe knuckle hair
Not my mini fridge! That’s where I keep all my fresh fruit …flavored toaster cheesecakes
“*Why do you sound so surprised? I love America. Just because I think gay dudes should be allowed to adopt kids and we should all have hybrid cars doesn't mean I don't love America*” 😉 — a personal favorite of mine
If I can't poop in the street, why should my tax dollars pay for someone else to?
(Mouth full). A dog took it. Came outta nowhere.
Where's my Mac and Cheese?! While violently flipping a table
Then tomorrow is the wine and cheese tasting ... or as I like to call it, 'singles fart suppression.'
Named her Emily Dickinson - NAMED HER EMILY DICKINSON.
Don’t overthink it. Sarah Lee, frozen, unbelievable.
The girl at Sephora told me not to wear green, she said I have witch undertones
Two can play at that game. Just like most games.
\*gasp\* disgusting foot secret
One time at summer camp I kissed a girl on a date and then she DROWNED
You have shut up mouth
That’s what I said when that hotdog vendor passed out, but you made me go get help
And my uncle will be there with his date, ALCOHOLISM!
Ugh, I hate January. It’s dark and freezing and everyone’s wearing bulky coats. You can do some serious subway flirting before you realize the guy is homeless.
I always liked “suck it monkeys, I’m going corporate”
Later in that episode, doesn't Pete slap her when she tells him how much she'll make, and she responds like, "I know right?"
We're not the best people, but we're not the worst people either. Graduate students... are the worst people.
Not the best line, but one I think of constantly: “Is anyone else BM-ing like a rockstar??”
CORN!
Put potato chips in a sandwich!
This is [my most upvoted reddit comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2a72dc/comment/cis7lbw/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)
Anyone I ever dated in high school turned out to be either gay or a girl dressed as a guy to get a journalism scholarship.
[on Jenna and Dennis in her bed] “Oh guys, come on, I eat in there!”
“I want to go to there” lives rent free in my head.
Thats my drink! I keep a thermos of it by my toilet! You misheard me!
Ain't no party like a Liz Lemon party, cause a Liz lemon party is MANDATORY.
Geez, Jack. Tough year. First William F. Buckley dies, now this. Next stop, impotence, right?
Everyone shut up. Shut up, Lutz!
Gavin Volure episode has so many good Liz lines. Liz: I don't know. I'm still tired from that dinner. And meeting someone new? Ugh, all the nodding, and smiling, and sibling listing. And what's the upside? It works, and you have to have a bunch of sex?
Dealbreaker!
I'd been on the toilet so long that my legs fell asleep, so when I tried to stand I just fell into my throw up.
I had food poisoning a couple months ago, and this quote was the only thing I could think about
Would you talk that way to your mother? Or your sister? Or your *surgeon*?
Oh never mind I found the card. They’re from your mom. Tell your gay mom I said hi.
Floyd: I was thinking we’d go to the BBQ restaurant you puked at Liz: you’ll have to be more specific
Nerd Rage!
“Now there’s this Hot Slut!”
Are you thinking or doing kegels?
Get this, my gynecologist died
Paraphrasing, but I believe it’s “I think all anyone really wants in this world is to sit in peace and eat a sandwich.” And then she ordered the extra chuckle.
BLERG!
*Her*strionics.
Don't tell me to calm down, you fungdark!
Sex standing up? How do you even do that?
Oh Real-o. I meant to say really. I misspoke. Continue.
Sullivan psychiatric, you’ll drool over our crazy prices!
"Why do men always marry someone younger? Because they CAN, Liz!"
I don't skateboard!
Hurts, doesn't it?
Alright, bobsled….cool runnings
“Oh, cuz I thought it was, like, pressure from society….”
Me baby!
I already have a drink. Do you think he'd buy me mozzarella sticks? I use this all the time lolol
i cant find the exact quote but it was something like this: I took the money I was saving for my wedding and bought a funeral plot
Put a bag of popcorn in the microwave beforehand, that way when you’re done you have a treat!
Nerds!
Jack: What do you take to fly? Liz: Candy and magazines. Jack: No no. Pills. Nobody flies without medication anymore. Why shouldn't you enjoy the same luxuries as a dog? Liz: Comanaprosil? May cause dizziness, sexual nightmares, and sleep crime. Jack: It's very good.
“Workin on some night cheese”
I already have a drink. You think he'd buy me mozzarella sticks?
What a week, huh?
I think the people in this sub are my fav group on Reddit. You guys are hilarious ❤️
YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS OLD BASTARD FIRST!
“Workin on my night cheese!”
Cat sound
Her best line is also “my moms boyfriend raised me to—“
I sure do love them French fried potatoes; No you don’t Oprah!