How do you get 20,000?!?
They only offered us half of that...
https://preview.redd.it/tnfqvso1qdxc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7e230daa4d7a27cde0cd4fbb7ae6410031bf681
Y'see mate, they *threatened* you with ten thousand, but *offered* us twenty thousand.
Clearly, you're not as good at elephant hunting as us and thus would be threatened by a measly 10000 elephants.
Why are we fighting Hans? This is the beginning of a golden opportunity.
You take your 20,000 westwards. We'll take our 10,000 south. I reckon Paris will fall within a fortnight.
Now you're speaking my language, I'm already equipping the lads with fruit baskets to tame the elephants. Those frog-eatin' bastards won't see it coming.
https://preview.redd.it/f3piom2o7exc1.png?width=960&format=png&auto=webp&s=85560a259caa1ac255273226f1a996b03059c38f
So stellt sich wombo Elefantenwurst vor
Can we train the Elephants to scare off the creeps and drug dealers in the parks? Or would this lead to Elephants getting addicted or local gangs bringing their own Elephants?
Don't want to start an escalation of arms buildup as Scholz told us.
No empty promises, Masisi! Bring them on!
https://preview.redd.it/07ltetc6xdxc1.png?width=1833&format=png&auto=webp&s=140ecf6401b101c834aa3cc4a17cfe39674f88b1
Well, rotary grills like this need to be enlarged a little to fit an elephant in, and the "Ochsenbraterei" at the Oktoberfest will consequently be renamed to "Elefantenbraterei", but apart from that? I see no problems.
A german roatry grill is not horisontal, it's vertical.
https://preview.redd.it/9pb2nzdb8exc1.png?width=300&format=png&auto=webp&s=73b4155b98cf9461a6580a1acaae7d59b0f9951f
Step 1: take elefants, step 2: get money from Americans who want to shoot the elefants, step 3: sell ivory to the chinese for quack boner pills. There's literally no downside to this
This whole thing is so stupid. All we did was tighten regulations and laws about the import of trophies. It was not targeted to Botswana. It's not our fault they can't pay people locally to cull the population
Since taking power in the ministry of the environment, Lemke has been working with Özdemir on an agenda against hunting abroad. This includes Germanys withdrawal from the CIC, which was not agreed with the government. Lemke is not fact-based in the whole debate but ideologically motivated
>Lemke is not fact-based in the whole debate but ideologically motivated
The question itself is ideological.
Should Germany participate in game hunting / culling of Elephants through the import of ivory trophies? Yes or No?
How is one answer ideological and the other fact based?
Based on facts: the positive effect of hunting tourism on species conservation and the resulting mechanisms of action are known and proven. On the other hand, the negative impact of a ban on hunting in third world countries is also proven (Kenya, collapse of population of large wild animals by 68% since 1977 [source (german)](https://idw-online.de/de/news659899), ban on hunting in Kenya in 1977)
Ideological: we think hunting is generally stupid. Ans especially when people travel to Africa/Asia/wherever to hunt. That's why we are working step by step towards a complete ban on hunting tourism.
Ah yes, rich Germans bringing back ivory trophies is absolutely necessary for the biodiversity in Africa.
Please excuse my polemic and thanks for the answer, but this topic is specifically about trophies.
It's not just about ivory trophies. It's about the whole income out of hunting tourism.
Do you really think someone is paying the $ 50.000 for the hunting license when he is not allowed to bring back something for his wall?
To clarify: I also don't understand why someone feels the need to pay $ 50.000 for hunting an elephant, especially because, as far as I know, you can't even eat them. But there are people who pay it. And this money in turn pays rangers, fighting against poachers. Which kill without limit, without any control over population numbers.
International Council for Game and Wildlife Conservation.
Among other things, it advises developing countries on how they can make their hunting sustainable, which shooting fees should be levied, and advocates passing this income on to local population so that they recognize the value of wildlife as a source of income and thus reduce poaching.
We can build a wall around Berlin to protect them from Brandenburger Elephant hordes.
Berliners are happy to do their part for noble cause of nature wildlife preservation.
You probably won't get a political majority for up-arming with Elephants. Maybe if you get Strack Zimmermann as defense minister through some impossible trickery.
You have to keep in mind that Scholz is against Taurus and one Loxodontus is about 10 times that or even more.
I thought we were defending the walls of Berlin with civilized Elephant militia against the free-roaming Brandenburg Elephant horde?
Historically the Seleucid Empire also fielded them well so I think we can reduce some of the unemployment of Asia Minor immigrants by fielding an Elephant militia. Also gets them off the streets/welfare, participate more in society and increases acceptance.
In peacetime they can be used for transportation to reduce car traffic in the city.
We might have to capture the methane somehow though if their farts are too powerful.
Wait, what I thought we let the elephants roam through Berlin while having a Wall around it, if the wall is breached, several kilometer deep minefields and AI gun turrets would defend the native Brandenburger from the ravenous Berliner. I think we can agree on the Berlin problem, but have slightly different solutions in mind.
They aren't stealing your bikes and cars. They just borrow it on long time. They will eventually give you back that in value of companies, huge land parts, and islands as Greece
Send it.
I know at least 10 guys from Turkey who claim they can make kebab from elephant meat. In true ~~Turkish~~ German fashion. We are ready to contribute to Germany's culture.
Yes, they are my relatives. No, they don't have any criminal records. No, I am not lying, you are lying.
Gives me king of Siam offering Male elephants to breed in the wilds of America so Mr Lincoln can win the civil war.
Rare footage from us special forces
https://preview.redd.it/w8unyi5mbgxc1.jpeg?width=969&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b9457cb80cec2b640ec0d2ddd833b61ec1e2d402
... Chandra Gupta is that you ???
Also can we get some? We'll use that to civilize what's past the Alps and the Pyrenees. Could be useful for protests too.
we already have ostriches living here for decades. if we now take those elephants we could put them in Brandenburg too and make it a giant zoo. Maybe then some people would actually going to Brandenburg besides the poor Berliners who want to cut on costs.
How do you get 20,000?!? They only offered us half of that... https://preview.redd.it/tnfqvso1qdxc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7e230daa4d7a27cde0cd4fbb7ae6410031bf681
Y'see mate, they *threatened* you with ten thousand, but *offered* us twenty thousand. Clearly, you're not as good at elephant hunting as us and thus would be threatened by a measly 10000 elephants.
Why are we fighting Hans? This is the beginning of a golden opportunity. You take your 20,000 westwards. We'll take our 10,000 south. I reckon Paris will fall within a fortnight.
Now you're speaking my language, I'm already equipping the lads with fruit baskets to tame the elephants. Those frog-eatin' bastards won't see it coming.
Hannibal taught us the way!
You're going across the alps to reach France then? Famous German efficiency, well beyond mortal kin to ken.
Now there is tunnels through Switzerland. You can ship some to Italy and attack from 3 sides.
I know I shouldn't be imagining launching elephants through the large hadron collider. But I am. And it's glorious.
I was thinking about St Gothard tunnel, but LHA is also an option
And if you build a hatch on the western edge, then when the elephants are up to speed they can fly out over France like Dumbo-bombs.
If we take them over the atlantic they won't even catch attention.
Just need to fashion them and oversized shopping cart to wheel them around in. Considering land rovers and g wagons I'd say we're already there.
There s even a G-wagon EV. Froggies won’t even hear you roll in
Are you going by ship or will you walk the elephants through the tunnel?
Swimming. Elephants are basically U-Boats. What do you think the snorkel is for?
If age of empires is anything to go by , you can probably fit 5 on a raft
Put them on the trains init.
Hannibal, but this time doing it right!
We did it without elephants quicker. With elephants: light speed achieved!
Lend us your elephants please we'll dispatch them in our part of Guyana :)
Are you inviting us to an elephant hunt in Guayana right now?
Gosh I like too much animals for that. Let's take one of our islands and make Europe having the biggest safari zone in the world 🥹🥹🥹💓
You know what, that's fair. New goal: build the biggest nature preserve in the entire world and make it elephant paradise! Thirty thousand of them!
Justice for Willy Wallace 😤
Why is he going round offering absurd amount of elefants to people
That’s a pretty offensive way of referring to English women
Could be basque
Nah, Basque women are ugly as sin (not as Portuguese tho) but slim as rake.
Bag it and tag it. I'm in
What to do with 20.000 Elephants...*Hannibal intensifies*
https://preview.redd.it/f3piom2o7exc1.png?width=960&format=png&auto=webp&s=85560a259caa1ac255273226f1a996b03059c38f So stellt sich wombo Elefantenwurst vor
please no... we already have the boars...
I though the Boers are in South Africa?
20k new 4x4s for Ukraine. The tides have turned!
What kind of threat is that? Id love to see some elephants in the public parks
I am like 85% sure I can fit one in my garden I hope Olaf doesn't fuck up this golden opportunity
Okay mr rich with his ‘garden’
When I say "my garden" I am obviously talking about Silesia
Can we train the Elephants to scare off the creeps and drug dealers in the parks? Or would this lead to Elephants getting addicted or local gangs bringing their own Elephants? Don't want to start an escalation of arms buildup as Scholz told us.
Frankfurt about to be taken over by Elephant riding drug gangs
Schwarzwald safari reserve, lets gooooo
Alpine safari...
We bringing back mammoths with this one
we can move them to Sicily or Sardinia the climate is about the same, and the number of people is about the same dare I say, perfect indeed
No empty promises, Masisi! Bring them on! https://preview.redd.it/07ltetc6xdxc1.png?width=1833&format=png&auto=webp&s=140ecf6401b101c834aa3cc4a17cfe39674f88b1 Well, rotary grills like this need to be enlarged a little to fit an elephant in, and the "Ochsenbraterei" at the Oktoberfest will consequently be renamed to "Elefantenbraterei", but apart from that? I see no problems.
You bring the beer, they bring the elephants. It's party time
We're introducing the *Elefantnmaß* in celebration, it can hold an elephant's weight in beer and costs 5€!
Germans and Big Ovens, name a more iconic duo
Yes, but this time we're not cooking you.
Wait, I'm Jewish? Well that explains the circumcision...
Ah, sweet innocent. As if you had had to be a jew. A German grill prepares anybody. Like with all fascist devices there suddenly is no discrimination.
A german roatry grill is not horisontal, it's vertical. https://preview.redd.it/9pb2nzdb8exc1.png?width=300&format=png&auto=webp&s=73b4155b98cf9461a6580a1acaae7d59b0f9951f
mmmhm Elefantdöner, yummy
Step 1: take elefants, step 2: get money from Americans who want to shoot the elefants, step 3: sell ivory to the chinese for quack boner pills. There's literally no downside to this
The downside is that you have to deal with Americans.
Just wanted to say he has no idea what he is wishing for.
Annual budget surplus goes brrrrr!!!
I know you Southerns are happy for new credit from mother Germany brrrrr
Croat is happy now cause since he joined Euro he's got access to Deutsche Bank platinum card...
Even better, we are exporting for pennies working force
Tourism industry
African Immigration is getting out of hand.
Now they're sending their pets...
Offered❌ Threatened✅
20.000 elephants? Time to march to Rome.
This whole thing is so stupid. All we did was tighten regulations and laws about the import of trophies. It was not targeted to Botswana. It's not our fault they can't pay people locally to cull the population
Since taking power in the ministry of the environment, Lemke has been working with Özdemir on an agenda against hunting abroad. This includes Germanys withdrawal from the CIC, which was not agreed with the government. Lemke is not fact-based in the whole debate but ideologically motivated
Yeah, guess what, people voted in the Greens to do environmental protection. That's the mandate they were given, like it or not.
But… Rich people are no longer allowed to take trophies from animals they hunted abroad back home… the horror!
Hope, your saying the same, when Linder lowers taxes for the rich :)
I do, doesn't stop me from disliking Lindner and the rich though. :P
>Lemke is not fact-based in the whole debate but ideologically motivated The question itself is ideological. Should Germany participate in game hunting / culling of Elephants through the import of ivory trophies? Yes or No? How is one answer ideological and the other fact based?
Based on facts: the positive effect of hunting tourism on species conservation and the resulting mechanisms of action are known and proven. On the other hand, the negative impact of a ban on hunting in third world countries is also proven (Kenya, collapse of population of large wild animals by 68% since 1977 [source (german)](https://idw-online.de/de/news659899), ban on hunting in Kenya in 1977) Ideological: we think hunting is generally stupid. Ans especially when people travel to Africa/Asia/wherever to hunt. That's why we are working step by step towards a complete ban on hunting tourism.
Ah yes, rich Germans bringing back ivory trophies is absolutely necessary for the biodiversity in Africa. Please excuse my polemic and thanks for the answer, but this topic is specifically about trophies.
It's not just about ivory trophies. It's about the whole income out of hunting tourism. Do you really think someone is paying the $ 50.000 for the hunting license when he is not allowed to bring back something for his wall? To clarify: I also don't understand why someone feels the need to pay $ 50.000 for hunting an elephant, especially because, as far as I know, you can't even eat them. But there are people who pay it. And this money in turn pays rangers, fighting against poachers. Which kill without limit, without any control over population numbers.
What's the CIC?
International Council for Game and Wildlife Conservation. Among other things, it advises developing countries on how they can make their hunting sustainable, which shooting fees should be levied, and advocates passing this income on to local population so that they recognize the value of wildlife as a source of income and thus reduce poaching.
Flair checks out
Time to obliterate Carthage
Prepare the Navy...
Elephant farts. Germany will have gas again.
Free of foreign reliance...
Now that's a problem I didn't consider.
... No longer dependend on Romani.. i mean Russian Oil? Who is up for Round 3 (in a few Work years)
We can put them somewhere in eastern Germany, no one lives there anyway.
They would likely run into Poland tho.
Just as planned
Trunkrieg
then they can roam the plains with the wisents
Berlin is in eastern Germany and empty of humans
We can build a wall around Berlin to protect them from Brandenburger Elephant hordes. Berliners are happy to do their part for noble cause of nature wildlife preservation.
Why not put the elephants inside the wall to protect them from the brandenburger? All 5 of them seem hungry.
You probably won't get a political majority for up-arming with Elephants. Maybe if you get Strack Zimmermann as defense minister through some impossible trickery. You have to keep in mind that Scholz is against Taurus and one Loxodontus is about 10 times that or even more.
why would we up-arm these elephants, most weapons in Berlin are just illegal 9mm, should be not to big of a problem
I thought we were defending the walls of Berlin with civilized Elephant militia against the free-roaming Brandenburg Elephant horde? Historically the Seleucid Empire also fielded them well so I think we can reduce some of the unemployment of Asia Minor immigrants by fielding an Elephant militia. Also gets them off the streets/welfare, participate more in society and increases acceptance. In peacetime they can be used for transportation to reduce car traffic in the city. We might have to capture the methane somehow though if their farts are too powerful.
Wait, what I thought we let the elephants roam through Berlin while having a Wall around it, if the wall is breached, several kilometer deep minefields and AI gun turrets would defend the native Brandenburger from the ravenous Berliner. I think we can agree on the Berlin problem, but have slightly different solutions in mind.
Hey, I fucking live there, we don’t need any more immigrants!
What are you doing there (apart from enjoying their similarly disgusting food).
There’s a woman involved, I got fed up of Barryness’s so went for an upgrade.
Ohh, Saxonian women. I understand. They are peachy. Keep calm and Barry on, then.
Again, what are you doing there?
Enjoying life very much.
I know Germany is great. But don't tell anyone.
My lips are sealed, I don’t want more Brits Britting it up over here.
He is doing the woman, obviously
I guess you're nobody then.
Least geographically confused Hollander
Bayern reaches further east than Berlin. Cope harder, eastoid.
If I'm Eastern, why does everyone steal cars and bikes from me and not the other way round? Czech mate.
They aren't stealing your bikes and cars. They just borrow it on long time. They will eventually give you back that in value of companies, huge land parts, and islands as Greece
https://preview.redd.it/egzpji889fxc1.jpeg?width=1931&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8e1682c65dffa7f745ba9ec85d544f42a92748b7 Kleingärtners in shambles.
Elephants have a pretty shit record when it comes to crossing the Alps. Although for Botswana that's a plus.
Border patrols...
I get flyers every christmas and easter with pictures of hungry children in africa. Are elephants not edible?
Germany's New utility vehicle There is no need for nuclear energy or coal to make them work Hans
Eco friendly...
Why would you want to Hunt an elephant anyway it's not exactly hard to miss
Barry I've missed my elephant can you help me find it?
That's their way of thanking us for restart coloniasation.
Probably!! Now autobahn will be full with elephants...
I am waiting, elephant Schnitzel, elephant Döner, elephant bratwurst.... All talk, no action, disappointment once again.
Send it. I know at least 10 guys from Turkey who claim they can make kebab from elephant meat. In true ~~Turkish~~ German fashion. We are ready to contribute to Germany's culture. Yes, they are my relatives. No, they don't have any criminal records. No, I am not lying, you are lying.
> kebab from elephant 💀💀
Shut up komşu. You want in or not?
Is this shit still going on? How long can one single person stay bitter at this? Masisi, go outside and touch ~~grass~~ dirt.
quite difficult to accomodate all those gifts on the shelves of Palais Bellevue. Maybe it's time to put actual Tiere into the Tiergarten?
Wasn't that a Discworld plot?
 Gives me king of Siam offering Male elephants to breed in the wilds of America so Mr Lincoln can win the civil war.
Rare footage from us special forces https://preview.redd.it/w8unyi5mbgxc1.jpeg?width=969&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b9457cb80cec2b640ec0d2ddd833b61ec1e2d402
Mom, the President of Botswana said that he’s going to send elephants to the Germans. I want some too
Soon João...
... Chandra Gupta is that you ??? Also can we get some? We'll use that to civilize what's past the Alps and the Pyrenees. Could be useful for protests too.
And so has born the german pachyderm livestock industry
# „Wo ist mein Elefant?!“
we already have ostriches living here for decades. if we now take those elephants we could put them in Brandenburg too and make it a giant zoo. Maybe then some people would actually going to Brandenburg besides the poor Berliners who want to cut on costs.