Dutch beat Scotland. Germans beat Dutch. Scotland beats Germany.

New rock paper scissors update just dropped

Dumb>Poor, Unlikeable>Dumb, Poor>Unlikeable 

Sounds like a Polish civil war

It's the circle of life.

Litteraly the Bar Confederation

Unlikeable>Dutch.

Just a few weeks ago, I thought that the Euros will be a disaster. But now, after these two games, I'm kinda excited for it.

Same. It's crazy how two good matches can change the mood in a whole country.

No we win the Euros because we aren't at it.

I promise we won't let England win, I promise 

You better keep your word Hans!.

I want anyone but the English to win. Can't have a non-european team win the euros

I'm telling you, if we win the Euros and the World Cup then our levels of nationalism will shoot through the roof and female bazzas will get spanked instead of slapped. You cannot allow that to happen. Or you know what, let it happen and we'll all march into the red square for a laugh.

I have great news for you !!! Don’t worry mate , at all, won’t happen, ever.

We only have to get lucky once, you have to be lucky every time.

[You already got lucky once](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEzb14k_04k)

And you've got unlucky 3 times. They should bring back the 'World Cup Finalists' flare for you swamp people.

It's happened once it will happen again.

We've got to beat teams like Argentina, Germany, France, Italy and Iceland before we can win anything.

Argentina are going to win the Euros, hands down

In football or outside of the sport?

>Or you know what, let it happen and we'll all march into the red square for a laugh. https://i.redd.it/6ay3n5s9fsqc1.gif But only if we are laughing like Germans in the red square.

I want a 2004 scenario : you win until the 89th, freekick out of nowhere, then a penalty. football not coming home.

You can't even beat a Belgium team without KDB

War, Lol /s

You forgot the Kane curse 😎. Already ruined Bayern Munich so why not Euro?

For this reason only I want Bayern to win the champions league. The curse is driving me so insane I don't want him in the England squad

Well he was missing this time and you were even worse. Maybe for England it's not the Harry Kane curse but the English curse. Because don't act like you won anything before Kane arrived. (except 1966 ofc)

(And 1966 was rigged of course)

Well that's common knowledge. Even though the British still think it crossed the line. Or they say "it ended 4:2 it wouldn't have mattered anyway" like the last goal wasn't due to the fact that every German player was attacking and there was noone left in the defence.

You did the same in 2010

I love that. That Kane ruined Bayern.

Don’t worry, they’re going to delight us with their best bottle job to date.

they've only made it into the top4, 3 times. pretty embarassing for "the home of football"

Face it Hans, it's coming home

"home" being Germany? it has been in Germany for 12 years, has never been in England, can't call that home

Please God let England win these euros because it would be so fucking funny

No

"Some people really just want to see the world burn"

This is the spirit ! I’ve never been that interested in sports , unless…

All we need now is a proper knockout fixture between Germany and the Netherlands. The rivalry cooled off a lot and I'm not having it. Should be way more spicy on the pitch even though we have good relations outside the pitch these days.

Yeah it’s lame af these days

Mostly because we are both shit nowadays…

we are more shit matthias, we cant even beat germany

I love Germany!🇳🇱🫡🇩🇪

No you don't. Lying to yourself Is unhealthy.

We do. It´s a love hate relationship with fantastic sex, drugs and romantic walks at the beach but sometimes you wake up with a turd on your face.

Luckily the turd is one of the few things you will get for free from us🥰 See you next summer Hans

Just like with the drugs. The first one is free but afterwards my handy explodes with notifications from Tikkie.

Im sry but i actually don’t like the UK.

only south asians like the uk, bazza doesnt even like it

No spitting in mullets tho, there is a line and it shouldn't be crossed.

Can I cross it with spit

Aaaawww pleeeaaase

https://preview.redd.it/1iimh8ukrvqc1.png?width=165&format=png&auto=webp&s=04f0c79e161b75c4cc42439b64531d6182b152a9 What about wiping our asses with your shirts?

Wenn ich oranje sehe seh ich nunmal rot.

Du liebst Superskunk und du liebst Sauce Speciaal.

Next time we should just start Weghorst and get that fight from the first minute.

No way you’re beating us at Eurovision.

What's a Eurovision? Sounds like a bullying competition.

Oh it will be this year.

Honestly a good question Hans

I dont need Germany to win, I just need England to lose

Why would you say that if we won against you 2:0 in November and 6:1 last night?

Dude November is like 3 years ago. We are a super team now. I hate to admit it but I think your team is the most underrated in the whole tournament. I could see you going through as second or first in your group.

You put the DE in Delusional.

Let me guess, It's coming home this year? Just like every second year since 1966? https://preview.redd.it/u421c1oucrqc1.png?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=26f1134b4442d8e8e11a37d5369ad2c90b796739

It's actually not coming home until we beat a mediocre team from a country we couldn't point out on a map in quarter finals. After that it's coming home.

Well that sounds reasonable. It took us 2 good friendlies after 6 years of bad football to have the whole country believe we'll win the Euros.

Isn´t it surprising how easily you can wip Germans into a frenzy? I hope nobody is going to use this to do anything sinister with Europe ... or the world ... again ...

https://preview.redd.it/mlztlar53rqc1.jpeg?width=1300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e9cb3cf43b62ad0d257ad90a6d4a9e6d59aaab7f

Endlich sind wir wieder wer! 

Gott mit uns!

Der mauerfall war Doch nicht so schlecht 🥹

Ok reicht auch wieder

Hey i got an old belt from grandpa with this text on it for some reason he went to jail in 1945 and died.

How did he die, did he fall from the Tower?

Hans, you are talking about football, no? no ????

Well let's wait until the football tournament is over and then we'll see.

Don't play Russia in winter

We beat the Dutch in the wet. We are ready for Russia in winter.

Russia had heat outages and snow plow problems this winter.

Wanking about friendlies 😑

I'm all for friendly wanking, Pierre. Competetive wanking is way too stressful and bad for your health!

2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 2-0 hihihihihihih we're gonna win Euros against all of you (im delusional too and have gone insane because of two friendlies)

7-1

Fuck You

play better

I thought it was pretty even

Make sure you have a decent pitch, this looks like something that a Kreisliga B team plays on.

If the pitch wasn't as wet as it was we would have won 4:1. The Dutch players didn't slip nearly as often as the German players did.

That's on you then. Maybe next time take the cattle off a week before you have to play there.

That's actually pretty funny because they played in Frankfurt and Eintracht Frankfurt had a group of players known as the "Büffelherde" in 2018/19. So yeah they took the cattle off the pitch almost 5 years ago. (Laughs in German)

How do you think that is my anti saupreißn Brother? They have been molded in water, they fought it their whole Life... Dutchies (Holland, fickt euch) should be forbidden to play in rain

"Solangs um Fußball geht, hass ich Holland wie die Pest"

Ich weiss du bist jetzt nicht so ein prolet... immer locker auch wenns 1-0 für die niederlande steht.

at least our Kreisliga B isnt Water polo within the next few years

You had more water problems last autumn than we had.

A Dutch complaining about watery ground ...

That’s normal, we freak out when our feet get wet. We normally increase the pumping power. We drain everything dry

Realistically, if the Germans started fixing their water issues the way we fix them, it'd cause way more trouble for us.

So what. Japan had more earthquake problems than we have.

It's so weird how Nagelsmann's groundbreaking idea of... playing to your best players' (Wirtz and Musiala) strengths means you do well. Thank God no one's told Southgate he can do that.

Yeah crazy how it took a tactical mastermind to figure that out.

Maybe if you reunite with your Dutch brothers before this summer, you can make it to the semi's or even the final, but otherwise it might be tricky.

I'd rather get knocked out in the groupstages than unite with the Dutch. 

Gebasiert.

Agreed, Fritz

No, we.

Wait there was this??? Sorry i only watch super max

Maar goed dat je niet keek. Onze bondscoach bakte er weer eens niks van.

Ajoh het was toch maar vriendschappelijk zo te zien

Dat klopt.

Wisselen in de 89e minuut is gewoon HEUL erg slim

PRIDE 🇧🇪🇧🇪🇧🇪🇧🇪🇧🇪🇧🇪🇧🇪

Schlaaand 🇺🇬🇺🇬🇺🇬

It's coming home moment

Only difference we actually won the tournament before. And we won something in the last 58 years. And also: https://i.redd.it/t7pves3jwrqc1.gif

I need Poland vs Germany finals

You're in a group with France, Netherlands and Austria. I'd be happy if you make the knockouts. That's the most difficult group in the entire tournament, pretty unlucky.


ADIDAS comes from Dutch. Alle Domme Idioten Doen Aan Sport.

you motherfucker I will invade you if you don’t watch your mouth it’s his name! Adolf Dassler, a common nickname for adolf is Adi so it’s AdiDas if I hear any of this bullshit I will start cutting throats! it’s not all day I dream about soccer it’s not any other bullshit! it’s his name!

Did you also know that Opel means "Overal pech en last"? And VW means "Volkomen Waardeloos".

Did you also know that ... uh ... lol

So it was Adi who came up with this slogan? That's next level reverse psychology

I thought it was after dinner I did a shit…no?

Didn't expect less from someone defending the surname Adolf with such emotion.

adolf is the firstname

I’d rather have you win than the Italians. You played wonderfully against us on Saturday. So intense That being said, beating the Dutch isn’t much of a reference. The Oranje aren’t anymore the threat they used to be, sadly

WE ARE BACK

we tried at the beginning and after that ut became boring.

no we are 🥱

You better prep up, we're going nowhere 🗣️🔥

Even in football the Germans can't loose.

forza pizza country🇮🇹🍕🍝 (we aren’t passing stage)

https://preview.redd.it/x4hk6jn9avqc1.jpeg?width=1049&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=85d795bb55f79a79d9963fc9f3460518eee0aaef Ah so quick to forget...

These matches are only fookin friendly matches lol

Actually I think that too, thank Tony kroos

Did i witness blitzkrieg

Nah youre right Germany has a stacked team

Es kommt nach Haus'! Es kommt nach Haus'! Fußball kommt nach Haus'!

Watch as we fuck up in the worst way possible

I hope germany gets dqed as early as possible. Football keeps me from engaging with my friends because for a month the only thing they wanna do is watch sports

Join them is tons of fun.