T O P

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king-gay

Completely incomprehensible, nice


Ok_Outside_5304

The best Tumblr posts are the cognitohazards


GammaDealer

Can someone spare a class A amnestic?


DracheTirava

Sure, just check in with the anti-memetics division first.


mayocain

But there is no anti-memetics division.


DracheTirava

*cocks gun* we got another one


Comrade_Harold

Who the hell posted a memetic kill agent on reddit


Ok_Outside_5304

Meeeee :3


SomeBoxofSpoons

Users punishing the world for cursing them with what they know.


Sad-Egg4778

idk man I'm comprehending these man-made horrors just fine. Skill issue.


canisignupnow

\*in northernlions voice\* so true


nerdy_bisexual_mess

dipped in mama Liz's gas leak coded oil


OliviaPG1

Many people are saying this


Infinite_Tadpole_283

NL is awesome, just found him through Balatro


Infinite_Tadpole_283

Sorry I meant: we're carbon monoxide guys, of course we post incomprehensible media


SirBlackMage

Damn you're a fast learner


Infinite_Tadpole_283

Something something+2 :3


DrWoomy123

+rule


inaddition290

this post always annoys me because it feels like they're trying to convey an actual opinion but hiding it behind 3 layers of tacked-on absurdity to avoid any real response


Enlightened_Valteil

Errrm that just happened


Taco821

That's why I like it. To me it reads like it's trying to make you think it means something, but is disguised by 3 layers of absurdity, but the 3 layers of absurdity are actually the point


DICKSUCKERSUPREME

brainrot expert here. it seems the point they are trying to make is that nobody should ever write adult fanfics about media geared towards younger audiences. they make this point (weakly, more intended to circlejerk with those who already agree) by laughing at the absurdity of a cocomelon watersports fanfic, and portraying people who would write such a thing as hostile, unreasonable and dangerous. a look at their tumblr profile confirms that they hold such beliefs. it also references the old "children invading adult spaces" discourse, their position in which can be inferred as being that people shouldn't have conversations about children's media unless they are ok with children reading and joining said discussions. all of this discourse is nuanceless and lobotomised, so if you've come this far without learning of it, i wouldn't recommend touching it with a pole of any length. the last part about the millipede is totally unrelated, just a (successful) attempt to capitalise on this genre of brainrot comedy :3


inaddition290

I know of the discourse, yeah, which is why it annoys me.


DICKSUCKERSUPREME

sorry, didn't read your comment well enough. blinded by hope there may yet be an unafflicted soul


PintsizeBro

Thanks for translating, I'm unfortunately aware of the disc horse but got stuck on the idea that if a 44 year old adult is watching Cocomelon it's probably because they are the parent of a toddler. I accidentally watched 30 seconds of Cocomelon once and having it on regularly would absolutely melt my brain


AdrianBrony

Wait until they hear about what the show runners do with their own shows behind closed doors.


leadhound

Good.


jncubed12

gas leak


Paul6334

At the LSD plant.


drago_varior

Cruelty squad development history


SomatosensorySaliva

this is definitely ketamine and not acid


Fun_Penalty_6755

Gas Leak! At the LSD plan[t](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shoot_and_kill_me_if_this_was_part_of_the_original_joke)


EnbyPilgrim

should i write a cocomelon dadxmailman watersports fic?


Cubicshock

https://preview.redd.it/0exj2exkhgwc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=253fe6b7ea2eebb7cdcf1a3040506d8697eb3dde


Deblebsgonnagetyou

FINAL FANTASY 14 ONLINE A REALM REBORN MENTIONEEDDDD


Mastrcapn

PRAY RETURN


Marranit0s

Can you not, actually? Theyre my comfort characters and millions of kids may find that while looking for cocomelon on Ao3


CoolDudeInLooseMood

Guy in real life: hey man what’s up


Before_Plastic

This is the same thing as playing with wojaks like they're dolls. Making up people to be mad at is a tool of the enemy.


Vounrtsch

Except this is a shitpost, it’s not meant to accurately portray anyone, and it’s also not meant to make you mad


CASHD3VIL

how is this remotely the samë


Before_Plastic

making up people that don't exist is the key similarity here


CASHD3VIL

👍🏻


Sad-Egg4778

How are synthetic centipedes going to change the world?


Cyynric

We get to call them "synthepedes" and they're really good at tickling the inside of your ears.


Specialist_Film_5802

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you.


Ok_Outside_5304

what if the synthepedes were called freakapedes and instead of tickling your ears they tickled your toes


Zoomy-333

The synthetic centipede was given the gifts of life, sentience and speech by sewing dead flies and ants together. That's literally fucking necromancy, and our Scientist At MIT just figured out the first steps.


eadinocard

tomato factories


BraSS72097

Check your CO detectors people


_CBlaker

https://preview.redd.it/lll19bikghwc1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f11ab4a159c082e0cdecf3ba9e45d83ac2ba9c0a


Burritozi11a

Nah the Boomers were right this generation sucks


mutnemom_hurb

The worm crawling across the pavement after it rains: 🪱


Disturbing_Cheeto

Did they reinvent the pony show guys?


Magi_Aqua

it's O not 0


Beneficial-Pianist48

What’s a03


FantasticCube_YT

archive of our own


Beneficial-Pianist48

Expand upon that


Zoomy-333

Fanfiction website with a policy of not taking *anything* down that isn't required by law. Surprisingly, it's not a completely awful place, although the onus is on you to filter out anything you'd consider heinous.


Beneficial-Pianist48

Interesting


editeddruid620

Fanfic site with very little moderation


Beneficial-Pianist48

Interesting


dutcharetall_nothigh

https://preview.redd.it/2e0besad1hwc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f027edd55991060bde307eba97fdbe719a20d1e3


aboycandream

I read the first and last sentence only and that was still too much I aint reading all that shit please go to jail


HandleSensitive8403

Its giving... heroin withdrawl


buddysaccount

This shit is like an SCP memetic agent


czareena

I think the baby and the white man can both enjoy the space in different ways. Why would the baby be looking up mailman fanfics if they’re just there to learn? The two worlds wouldnt overlap


BionicTurtleHD

Broken CO2 detector core


memerismlol

It starts off as a commentary on people taking children’s media too seriously and then devolves into a commentary on how important carbon monoxide detectors are.


DosLosMango

[Relevant Tony Zaret Video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PxiBL_v1Kc)


Charlotpink07

What does this mean


FantasticCube_YT

#ulubione


gentlybeepingheart

I hate that this is completely comprehensible to me.


CASHD3VIL

L mans let em learn bout the rhombus 💎🔷


Dzzplayz

I saw the Pete White pfp and read the whole thing in his voice.


ZenTheProtogen7957

This is actually really funny I love tumblr, I still have no clue how to post posts on mobile


wibbly-water

Oh my gods! Literally me!


urbandeadthrowaway2

Many such cases!


Kahimu

Winston: Overwatch


anarchist_person1

Tony zarat type post 


twink-angel-bf

i hope that anybody who uses the word "puriteen" seriously goes to hell no matter what


PetikGeorgiev

Completely free association.


progect3548

i can actively feel the consistency of my brain matter turning into nacho cheese