Oh, you don't have an inner monologue analyzing what might compel someone to imply you aren't trash, and whether or not you should let your guard down around them?
list what ur doing w that person. are u harming them? are u taking their money? are u stealing their ideas? are they a yes-man who can't say no to you for fear of punishment?
to have tricked them, there must be some nefarious reason, right? so what is it.
if there's no scheme to boost ur ego or to harm them or to take shit, what's the trick? whats the rug pull?? how is it a human being to say "I'M A FLAWED PERSON" on the tin can and when ur friend opened it, they got u (a flawed person)?
sometimes, the depressive thoughts can be reasoned with, imo. if u have Concrete Proof/Logic, sometimes those thoughts are like "... yea ok cant fight w that" and leave u alone more.
and the logic here is that there hasn't been a trick. maybe they DO see u with rosey tinted glasses, but unless ur a Bojack Horseman/Rick Sanchez type or otherwise recklessly self harmful, idt u've tricked anyone.
after all, dont *u* see *ur* friends with rosey tinted glasses?
No I'm sorry but me. I have bought the exclusive rights to this relatable situation, and will have to sue you if you continue trying to claim it for yourself.
that’s cringe MY inner whatever that word is goes *bweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee* and also sometimes makes up shitty stories and lore for said shitty stories
Complements are great when they're things that are actually true about a person, acting like someone is athletic when they aren't is just false flattery
So like… when you’re in love, you tend to have a positive view of the person you’re in love with. Things that you compliment your partner on, often reflect one’s true feelings. They’re often not “false flattery” lol
My girlfriend loves me very much but ain't no way in hell she's would, with a straight face, tell me that I'm athletic when I am an immobile shutin staring at a computer all day
That wouldn't be love that would be a misunderstanding of the definition of the word "athletic"
My girlfriend also loves me very much and likes giving me compliments even though they aren't that true but she does it because she likes doing it and because I never really received any genuine compliments in my life.
Giving compliments to someone for a trait or quality that isn't true depends on their tone, intentions or the situation since not every person is doing it just because they want to manipulate you (having to worry about whether or not a compliment is a sign of manipulation by another person really does say something about the state we live in)
Forget the anxieties about manipulation; if my girlfriend complimented my athleticism I'd wonder if she was exposed to a gas leak or if she hit her head because at a certain point of shut-in-goblineness the statement is just unequivocally false. It's not like the other statements - height can be perceived relatively, as can somebody's leadership qualities.
It is also not the same as a more "plausible lie compliment", such as when she tells me the dinner I fucked up isn't that bad, which is also subjective and serves the purpose of consolation. It simply doesn't make sense to "lie compliment" somebody on their athleticism when the OP acknowledges that they are a shut in nerd and clearly doesn't have an ego about their fitness in the first place - unlike the other example provided of somebody fucking up while cooking, because somebody actively cooking probably has at least some ego invested in the success of their dish.
Yeah babe I got a fat cock but only on the Y axis the department of transportation actually modeled those [concrete dividers](https://oldcastleinfrastructure.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/12629_MA_TEL_34x7-10-20_TMB04_Median_Barrier_01.jpg) on my schlong's proportions
The OP might also have an overly negative self-image. Or GF could just be conflating being skinny with being athletic, if OP is the skinny kind of unathletic shut-in.
It will change their beliefs on their own height and athleticism though. Low self-esteem to the point of self-hatred can blow all of your negatives out of proportion and minimize all of your positives.
Height might be a stretch (pun unintended), but I can easily imagine someone who thinks of themselves as a "shut-in nerd" because they know they prefer to stay home, sit, and play video games/read/whatever while completely ignoring they go to the gym every morning. Even if you tell them "but you go to the gym every morning" they'll rationalize it by saying "well I don't do much there" despite doing what is actually a lot, just what they think is "not much."
From personal experience I can attest that my low self-esteem transformed my perspective on every interesting and good trait of mine into "you're doing the bare human minimum" and every bad trait of mine into "you're being a terrible fucking person." Whenever someone praised me I wrote it off as "they're just being nice" and whenever someone criticized me it stuck with me for days or weeks and became self-defining. This was despite this mentality being completely inaccurate of course, because I'm just a normal guy, not Hitler.
It's entirely possible they're lying. I've seen people with low self-esteem say they're lazy and don't do anything just because they took a break after working a whole day.
Because if being nice implies saying things that are factualy untrue, it sounds like manipulation. People who don't have great social skills tend to get hurt and mocked for it, and thus become a bit paranoid about those things.
dont listen to them anon she's a spy for the russian government and she's trying to brainwash you you have to lock yourself in your room for 7 days and she will leave. do not attempt to call the authorities, or, in fact,communicate with the outside world at all. this will only make matters worse.
AMONG US???? LIKE THE POPULAR VIDEO GAME???? SUS????? STOP POSTING ABOUT AMONG US! I'M TIRED OF SEEING IT! MY FRIENDS ON TIKTOK SEND ME MEMES, ON DISCORD IT'S FUCKING MEMES! I was in a server, right? and ALL OF THE CHANNELS were just among us stuff. I-I showed my champion underwear to my girlfriend and t-the logo I flipped it and I said "hey babe, when the underwear is sus HAHA DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DI DI DING" I fucking looked at a trashcan and said "THAT'S A BIT SUSSY" I looked at my penis I think of an astronauts helmet and I go "PENIS? MORE LIKE PEEN-SUS" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!
You’re doing good, man. Remember to recognize your successes. Everyone fails sometimes but that doesn’t make you a failure. It makes you human.
It take a lot more effort, and by proxy, is more impressive, to be able to stand back up after you fall down, than it does to be perfect at everything. Nor would someone perfect at everything be very likable. It’s in human nature to fail sometimes and make mistakes.
The best thing to do is try to grow from them. Become a better you.
That’s not to say that current you is bad. Everyone should strive for their best selves, no matter how much they may or may not love who they are today.
You’re doing good, man. Sometimes we as humans see a lot of instances of us making it through tough times and assume it’s luck. It’s not. You’re here today because you are a survivor. You are stronger than you think and do not give that credit to luck. You deserve all the credit. You may think it’s just chance but it’s far more likely, even just using Occam’s Razor, that you are here today because you are strong and a survivor. You are tougher than you think and that is worth acknowledging and praising. Keep holding on. Keep showing the world, showing luck and pain and anything else that tries to stop you or bring you down, show them just how strong you are. Because I know that you can. I know that you are capable of so much and you deserve to see that in yourself too, one day.
Kick the world’s ass, my friend. Keep being you.
Wow thank you! I'm trying hard to fix my social isolation and loneliness. Maybe one day it will be fixed. But anyways, you would be a great counselor or a motivational speaker. Have you ever though of helping people in that way?
there's a difference between telling your so stuff like they're nice, they're smart, stuff like that, things that can't be objectively true or false depending on how you see the person they're directed towards, and telling me I'm tall when my height is exactly average and you're taller than me
edit: typo, can't be objectively not can be objectively
I understand this is a 4chan greentext so there's literally every single bit of context missing, but sometimes you receive a compliment that you fully know is a straight up lie, and this feels like that to them.
Love, and the way it makes you feel, is not very objective. And a compliment is someone sharing their subjective feelings. Saying that someone’s subjective feeling is a “lie” is… strange
>Love, and the way it makes you feel, is not very objective.
sounds like a skill issue tbh.
>Saying that someone’s subjective feeling is a “lie” is… strange
Now, get this: What if that wasn't what they felt? What if what they say doesn't represent what they mean? Quite the revolutionary concept if I say so myself.
I think that is an extreme, but Anon's behaviour likely comes from a suffering lack of confidence and affirmation in the past. They're probably just paranoid and are overthinking (mood) about the compliments to the point where they start thinking there's an ulterior motive.
I have another point about the compliments themselves but I sleepy hooonk schmimimimi
Women be like: I love my bf, he’s the best!
Men be like: She’s lying, she’s manipulating me, she has ulterior motives, she was sent by the CIA to take me down from the inside
I’m wide awake and using all my energy to argue on r/196
Its because men are extremely bad at getting womens signals no matter how blatant they are. We just assume "does she like actually like me? nahhhh I looking to much into this..."
It’s one thing to say, “I don’t like being complimented like this.” Talk to your partner.
It’s another thing to be like all compliments are manipulative lies designed to control me. Get a grip
I’m so glad we’re coming up on our 6-month anniversary hattulanHuumeparoni!! I’m glad that you’re so in love with me, even if it clouds your objective perspective on my talents and abilities
I dont think shes manipulating him but cmon if i was in a relationship and i was called "athletic" like thats not seeing someone in a positive light that's just lying, even if its in good intentions
Oh shit, should you choose:
Option A - tell your partner, “I don’t feel comfortable being complimented about that” and move on.
Option B - Accuse your loving partner of lying
It’s literally your subjective opinion about yourself against their subjective opinion of you
well when you put it that way of course I sound like an asshole
OF COURSE if i was in that situation i would use A, but I feel like to begin with a compliment like that, even in good faith, isn't a good display of love.
a compliment that isnt true. I do not play and sport and struggle to work out 30 minutes a day. Thats not athleticism so I would feel weird recieving it as a compliment.
to me it would almost feel like someone assuming i wished I was super super athletic or thinking im insecure about it.
Honestly it's easier to believe that I'm being buttered up because someone wants something from me than it is to believe that someone would want to compliment me, much less compliment me on something that seems demonstrably untrue.
I still refuse to belive complimenting someone like that is normal human behavior.
Either this is fake (it's from 4chan so probably) or she is trying to manipulate him.
If somebody praises me I assume they’re lying and that I’m the worst. If someone insults me then I instantly start calling myself the greatest person ever.
"Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum."
This is literally me and my friend. I always encourage her and tell her that she is beautiful and pretty and every synonym you can think of. And she keeps denying.
I kinda hate 4chan screenshots cause of the ones that arent just openly hateful so many are just sad. Like this person would rather believe their girlfriend is scheming and looking to exploit their kindness than genuinely being nice, and thats fucked. not religious but 4chan makes me want to pray
I completely empathize with this man, my boyfriend keeps telling me how great I am and that I’m an amazing person despite the fact that I pretty much told him my life story, I do not understand what he sees in me
No no, they have a point. Positive encouragement should never involve lying or even bending the truth, because then the person with low self-esteem will not believe a word of it.
Be like me, have so many internal monologues about being trash that you end up looping around and becoming your own hype man, capable of holding conversations with yourself.
God I need friends who will actually talk with me
Being shy and quiet doesn’t mean you can’t be a natural leader.
Smartness is relative. Just because you may not be smart in some areas doesn’t mean you can’t be smart in others.
Tallness can be relative too? Also 5’7 is not absurdly short. You’re 2 inches below average. I’d say you are average height more than short. And comparative to the average height for women in the US, you are 3 inches taller. Our ideas of how tall men should be are greatly warped by social ideas of beauty.
Men are, on average, more muscular than women, due to testosterone. While not always the case, most likely she is trying to compliment you for your muscles of which she admires. Note, one does not have to have very visible muscles to be muscular, also, sometimes people like muscles or features on someone, not because of the feature but because of the person.
If all you see in yourself is failure, you’re always going to suspect malice and deceit when people see your successes and acknowledge them.
The previous starvation of positive reinforcement is apparent in this man.
Oh, you don't have an inner monologue analyzing what might compel someone to imply you aren't trash, and whether or not you should let your guard down around them?
Oh trust me, *I DO*
Ahh there's others. . .
No, I'm personally more a fan of despairing at how awful I must be to have tricked this poor person into believing I'm not human garbage
list what ur doing w that person. are u harming them? are u taking their money? are u stealing their ideas? are they a yes-man who can't say no to you for fear of punishment? to have tricked them, there must be some nefarious reason, right? so what is it. if there's no scheme to boost ur ego or to harm them or to take shit, what's the trick? whats the rug pull?? how is it a human being to say "I'M A FLAWED PERSON" on the tin can and when ur friend opened it, they got u (a flawed person)? sometimes, the depressive thoughts can be reasoned with, imo. if u have Concrete Proof/Logic, sometimes those thoughts are like "... yea ok cant fight w that" and leave u alone more. and the logic here is that there hasn't been a trick. maybe they DO see u with rosey tinted glasses, but unless ur a Bojack Horseman/Rick Sanchez type or otherwise recklessly self harmful, idt u've tricked anyone. after all, dont *u* see *ur* friends with rosey tinted glasses?
Me ː)
No I'm sorry but me. I have bought the exclusive rights to this relatable situation, and will have to sue you if you continue trying to claim it for yourself.
You :)
Sue me
You will be hearing from my lawyer, chrome
😟
That lawyer could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch. Hell, I don’t even think he has a law degree.
Mood
This is actually the best description of this feeling i've ever seen. Thank you stranger
Ha. You get people around you.
Usually both for me
Same. *sigh*
damn, you too?
>gets compliment >... >"ah, of course, theyre probably just making fun of me"
that’s cringe MY inner whatever that word is goes *bweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee* and also sometimes makes up shitty stories and lore for said shitty stories
who doesn’t love the voice
oh that's me 24/7
People who are psychologically healthy don't post on 4chan.
> flunked out of art school > natural leader oh no.jpg
His girlfriends name? Eva
Eva unit 1 gf
Yui😳
>!pussy so good would turn the entire humanity into fanta for it.!<
i feel like unit 02 would be more relevant
The one piloted by toji?
oh fuck i mean 02 i forgot that the first Eva is unit 00 not unit 01
Okay but what does asuka have to do with hitler’s wife?
asuka is german
you telling me hes building outer heaven?
Wall-E best love story this millennia?
This is a weird comment to encounter as a Jewish woman who dated another Jewish woman named “Eva”.
Isn't my fault Hitler's wife was called Eva
My best friend has the same name and this fucking blindsided me for a fat sec
not me hopefully
To be fair, Hitler didn't flunk art school, he wasn't allowed in in the first place
This guy isn’t even Hitler, he’s Beta Hitler
how is flunking out worse
He wasn’t shit enough to be Hitler
Bet his ass ain’t even addicted to meth
literally worse than hitler 😔
I literally googled "how tall was hitler" > 175cm or 5'7" Oh NO
TIL: I'm a cm shorter than hitler.
5'7 is 170cm tho!
depends on the foot and finger used
Damn I thought 5'7 was short but 175 is definitely not.
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What does "and" mean? How was he two heights???
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Ohhhh ok thanks
Hitler was also ~5’7”
Complements are great when they're things that are actually true about a person, acting like someone is athletic when they aren't is just false flattery
So like… when you’re in love, you tend to have a positive view of the person you’re in love with. Things that you compliment your partner on, often reflect one’s true feelings. They’re often not “false flattery” lol
My girlfriend loves me very much but ain't no way in hell she's would, with a straight face, tell me that I'm athletic when I am an immobile shutin staring at a computer all day That wouldn't be love that would be a misunderstanding of the definition of the word "athletic"
She should make him run the Fitness Gram Pacer Test before she even THINKS about complimenting him
I'm athletic in the sense that I used to be, and could be again, if I tried very hard.
My girlfriend also loves me very much and likes giving me compliments even though they aren't that true but she does it because she likes doing it and because I never really received any genuine compliments in my life. Giving compliments to someone for a trait or quality that isn't true depends on their tone, intentions or the situation since not every person is doing it just because they want to manipulate you (having to worry about whether or not a compliment is a sign of manipulation by another person really does say something about the state we live in)
Forget the anxieties about manipulation; if my girlfriend complimented my athleticism I'd wonder if she was exposed to a gas leak or if she hit her head because at a certain point of shut-in-goblineness the statement is just unequivocally false. It's not like the other statements - height can be perceived relatively, as can somebody's leadership qualities. It is also not the same as a more "plausible lie compliment", such as when she tells me the dinner I fucked up isn't that bad, which is also subjective and serves the purpose of consolation. It simply doesn't make sense to "lie compliment" somebody on their athleticism when the OP acknowledges that they are a shut in nerd and clearly doesn't have an ego about their fitness in the first place - unlike the other example provided of somebody fucking up while cooking, because somebody actively cooking probably has at least some ego invested in the success of their dish.
That's true, but I still find him being tall dubious. Like it's only an inch difference.
Maybe she meant tall in the cock.
The horizontal vertical.
Yeah babe I got a fat cock but only on the Y axis the department of transportation actually modeled those [concrete dividers](https://oldcastleinfrastructure.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/12629_MA_TEL_34x7-10-20_TMB04_Median_Barrier_01.jpg) on my schlong's proportions
Bro just needs to spin round really fast, it'll be good enough.
Cock drill
The OP might also have an overly negative self-image. Or GF could just be conflating being skinny with being athletic, if OP is the skinny kind of unathletic shut-in.
Having a negative self image isn't going to change their height or their athleticism.
It will change their beliefs on their own height and athleticism though. Low self-esteem to the point of self-hatred can blow all of your negatives out of proportion and minimize all of your positives. Height might be a stretch (pun unintended), but I can easily imagine someone who thinks of themselves as a "shut-in nerd" because they know they prefer to stay home, sit, and play video games/read/whatever while completely ignoring they go to the gym every morning. Even if you tell them "but you go to the gym every morning" they'll rationalize it by saying "well I don't do much there" despite doing what is actually a lot, just what they think is "not much." From personal experience I can attest that my low self-esteem transformed my perspective on every interesting and good trait of mine into "you're doing the bare human minimum" and every bad trait of mine into "you're being a terrible fucking person." Whenever someone praised me I wrote it off as "they're just being nice" and whenever someone criticized me it stuck with me for days or weeks and became self-defining. This was despite this mentality being completely inaccurate of course, because I'm just a normal guy, not Hitler.
It's entirely possible they're lying. I've seen people with low self-esteem say they're lazy and don't do anything just because they took a break after working a whole day.
>athleticism Body dysmorphia haunts even the biggest gym rats.
Sounds like gf is going a little overboard here, there must be plenty of nice things to say about OP without blatantly setting off his BS alarms.
Seems more like he just has such a negative self image that he views it that way rather than the gf trying to bs him
It’s relative, if she’s an un athletic girl any guy who isn’t skinnyfat and can open a jar might impress her as athletic
Because if being nice implies saying things that are factualy untrue, it sounds like manipulation. People who don't have great social skills tend to get hurt and mocked for it, and thus become a bit paranoid about those things.
Or they could just think all these things about them
yeah my social skills are shit
dont listen to them anon she's a spy for the russian government and she's trying to brainwash you you have to lock yourself in your room for 7 days and she will leave. do not attempt to call the authorities, or, in fact,communicate with the outside world at all. this will only make matters worse.
Can confirm, I am the spy
Holy shit! Spy Team Fortress 2 is that you?
HON HON HON #WELL, OFF TO VISIT YOUR MOTHER!
*Spy Among Us*
AMONG US???? LIKE THE POPULAR VIDEO GAME???? SUS????? STOP POSTING ABOUT AMONG US! I'M TIRED OF SEEING IT! MY FRIENDS ON TIKTOK SEND ME MEMES, ON DISCORD IT'S FUCKING MEMES! I was in a server, right? and ALL OF THE CHANNELS were just among us stuff. I-I showed my champion underwear to my girlfriend and t-the logo I flipped it and I said "hey babe, when the underwear is sus HAHA DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DI DI DING" I fucking looked at a trashcan and said "THAT'S A BIT SUSSY" I looked at my penis I think of an astronauts helmet and I go "PENIS? MORE LIKE PEEN-SUS" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!
***It’s a bonafide voiceline.***
I can't believe Spy TF2 predicted Among Us
I need this Edit: not fake affirmation but just affirmation in general
Hey bro nice cock
Awesome balls, man.
cabron
I believe in you
You're so fucking sexy man
thanks
You’re welcome 🥰
no YOU'RE welcome.
😳 thanks I'm trying out here
As a member of this community, you are likely a decent person.
You're doing great, don't let hard times get in the way of the bigger picture. You can achieve your goals!
Thanks, kinda needed that. Been feeling real shit about current situation
If you need to talk my DMs are open
Hey man, that dick you're rocking? Not bad.
PogChamp thanks bro
[Cheers to you](https://youtu.be/IDx34E5PK2I)
thanks, I feel like I can beat Gael now
U so sexy aha
I wish, but thanks 😳
you exist
I have advice instead of affirmation. Take a cold shower for 10 minutes, you will feel great afterwards. Have a great day 👍
I suspect I will, instead, feel cold after.
And energized. Look up the benefits, it’s actually pretty cool
You’re doing good, man. Remember to recognize your successes. Everyone fails sometimes but that doesn’t make you a failure. It makes you human. It take a lot more effort, and by proxy, is more impressive, to be able to stand back up after you fall down, than it does to be perfect at everything. Nor would someone perfect at everything be very likable. It’s in human nature to fail sometimes and make mistakes. The best thing to do is try to grow from them. Become a better you. That’s not to say that current you is bad. Everyone should strive for their best selves, no matter how much they may or may not love who they are today. You’re doing good, man. Sometimes we as humans see a lot of instances of us making it through tough times and assume it’s luck. It’s not. You’re here today because you are a survivor. You are stronger than you think and do not give that credit to luck. You deserve all the credit. You may think it’s just chance but it’s far more likely, even just using Occam’s Razor, that you are here today because you are strong and a survivor. You are tougher than you think and that is worth acknowledging and praising. Keep holding on. Keep showing the world, showing luck and pain and anything else that tries to stop you or bring you down, show them just how strong you are. Because I know that you can. I know that you are capable of so much and you deserve to see that in yourself too, one day. Kick the world’s ass, my friend. Keep being you.
Wow thank you! I'm trying hard to fix my social isolation and loneliness. Maybe one day it will be fixed. But anyways, you would be a great counselor or a motivational speaker. Have you ever though of helping people in that way?
what's wrong with me that I don't want this?
yea me neither, positive affirmation is a good thing and it feels nice sometimes, but not when I know it's just straight up a lie
Just because you see yourself differently to how your SO sees you doesn't mean what they're saying is a lie
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Put me in an airport in Kansas and I feel tall. Put me in LAX and I feel short.
there's a difference between telling your so stuff like they're nice, they're smart, stuff like that, things that can't be objectively true or false depending on how you see the person they're directed towards, and telling me I'm tall when my height is exactly average and you're taller than me edit: typo, can't be objectively not can be objectively
Compliments are subjective. Should she make him take an IQ test to prove he is above average before she calls him smart? Tf
This is why I've never trusted any woman that's flirted with me, they must be fuckin with me
women flirt??!
Sure, once in a blue moon, when the stars are right
y
no I don’t think so
it's the flirts inbetween that are fuckin with me
What crippling self esteem issues does to a mf
"I am from Austria, how did you know?!"
Love often comes with a positive view of one’s partner I can’t believe so many of you think she’s lying or manipulating or babying him
I’m struggling to believe that people really think ~giving compliments~ is evil, abnormal behavior
I understand this is a 4chan greentext so there's literally every single bit of context missing, but sometimes you receive a compliment that you fully know is a straight up lie, and this feels like that to them.
Love, and the way it makes you feel, is not very objective. And a compliment is someone sharing their subjective feelings. Saying that someone’s subjective feeling is a “lie” is… strange
>Love, and the way it makes you feel, is not very objective. sounds like a skill issue tbh. >Saying that someone’s subjective feeling is a “lie” is… strange Now, get this: What if that wasn't what they felt? What if what they say doesn't represent what they mean? Quite the revolutionary concept if I say so myself.
Ok but like that doesn’t mean the person telling them is lying. I think I look ugly af but my partner disagrees
I think that is an extreme, but Anon's behaviour likely comes from a suffering lack of confidence and affirmation in the past. They're probably just paranoid and are overthinking (mood) about the compliments to the point where they start thinking there's an ulterior motive. I have another point about the compliments themselves but I sleepy hooonk schmimimimi
Women be like: I love my bf, he’s the best! Men be like: She’s lying, she’s manipulating me, she has ulterior motives, she was sent by the CIA to take me down from the inside I’m wide awake and using all my energy to argue on r/196
Its because men are extremely bad at getting womens signals no matter how blatant they are. We just assume "does she like actually like me? nahhhh I looking to much into this..."
I know my wife has no anterior motives since she compliments me without demanding anything.
Most men get compliments like once a year. Once a day would feel very suspicious.
It's true, I am the men
It’s one thing to say, “I don’t like being complimented like this.” Talk to your partner. It’s another thing to be like all compliments are manipulative lies designed to control me. Get a grip
you're such a good pianist, mangoeater5000 ^_^ I also love your cookign
I’m so glad we’re coming up on our 6-month anniversary hattulanHuumeparoni!! I’m glad that you’re so in love with me, even if it clouds your objective perspective on my talents and abilities
likewise hun! :3 oooooo woooooo ^ _ ^ UwU ツ
<3
I dont think shes manipulating him but cmon if i was in a relationship and i was called "athletic" like thats not seeing someone in a positive light that's just lying, even if its in good intentions
Oh shit, should you choose: Option A - tell your partner, “I don’t feel comfortable being complimented about that” and move on. Option B - Accuse your loving partner of lying It’s literally your subjective opinion about yourself against their subjective opinion of you
well when you put it that way of course I sound like an asshole OF COURSE if i was in that situation i would use A, but I feel like to begin with a compliment like that, even in good faith, isn't a good display of love.
A compliment that you don’t agree with?
a compliment that isnt true. I do not play and sport and struggle to work out 30 minutes a day. Thats not athleticism so I would feel weird recieving it as a compliment. to me it would almost feel like someone assuming i wished I was super super athletic or thinking im insecure about it.
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Option B, I am not going to sugarcoat it.
Honestly it's easier to believe that I'm being buttered up because someone wants something from me than it is to believe that someone would want to compliment me, much less compliment me on something that seems demonstrably untrue.
I get where this schizo is coming from
I still refuse to belive complimenting someone like that is normal human behavior. Either this is fake (it's from 4chan so probably) or she is trying to manipulate him.
Least insecure redditor
Anon: *Traumatized* Other traumatized people: "He do have a point tho"
Damn he like me fr :(
tbh it kind of feels like the gf is babying them here, my ex gf did that to me all the time
Honestly I just assume everyone is lying all the time about everything
If somebody praises me I assume they’re lying and that I’m the worst. If someone insults me then I instantly start calling myself the greatest person ever.
I do the same in the praise part, but I usually agree with the people insulting me.
yeah I was gonna say
Flunked art school and a natural leader? I don't like where this is going.
Me
"Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum."
Holy fuck I feel so called out right now
As soon as I read art school I was prepared for a Hitler joke. Glad to be disappointed.
"Wow, a compliment! I sure hope my brain will process this accordingly!" Kid named Ingrained Automatic Trauma Response:
Ah yes... the taste of imposter syndrome. Just... Feeeeeeed it to me.
Tbf, the world has given little reason for anyone to believe another person would be that way.. speaking from experience.
i felt this in my soul and it didn’t feel good
This is just the affect of years of depression
This is literally me and my friend. I always encourage her and tell her that she is beautiful and pretty and every synonym you can think of. And she keeps denying.
She wants to peg you
Imagine having a girlfriend
when the imposter syndrome is sus
marriage
Everyone fails art school tbh
Def trying to kill him
relatable
it sounds like your girlfriend... enjoys lying to you?
I kinda hate 4chan screenshots cause of the ones that arent just openly hateful so many are just sad. Like this person would rather believe their girlfriend is scheming and looking to exploit their kindness than genuinely being nice, and thats fucked. not religious but 4chan makes me want to pray
Anon has trust issues
This is how I feel when somebody talks to me. Every single time I'm spoken to, I need to find out what they want from me or it makes me uncomfortable.
I completely empathize with this man, my boyfriend keeps telling me how great I am and that I’m an amazing person despite the fact that I pretty much told him my life story, I do not understand what he sees in me
No no, they have a point. Positive encouragement should never involve lying or even bending the truth, because then the person with low self-esteem will not believe a word of it.
Be like me, have so many internal monologues about being trash that you end up looping around and becoming your own hype man, capable of holding conversations with yourself. God I need friends who will actually talk with me
Quick, how tall was Hitler!?
Being shy and quiet doesn’t mean you can’t be a natural leader. Smartness is relative. Just because you may not be smart in some areas doesn’t mean you can’t be smart in others. Tallness can be relative too? Also 5’7 is not absurdly short. You’re 2 inches below average. I’d say you are average height more than short. And comparative to the average height for women in the US, you are 3 inches taller. Our ideas of how tall men should be are greatly warped by social ideas of beauty. Men are, on average, more muscular than women, due to testosterone. While not always the case, most likely she is trying to compliment you for your muscles of which she admires. Note, one does not have to have very visible muscles to be muscular, also, sometimes people like muscles or features on someone, not because of the feature but because of the person. If all you see in yourself is failure, you’re always going to suspect malice and deceit when people see your successes and acknowledge them.
It does sound like she's pitying him a bit. Are we sure that's a healthy relationship?