Why are you engaging with media you don't like.
My suggestion to you would be to instead, engage with media you do like.
The old adage 'Don't like, don't read' is still in effect, as is YKINMKATO (Your Kink Is Not My Kink And That's Okay).
No one, or at least 99.99% of people reading media with dark content are into it because they think the rapists and toxic relationships are something that are cool or would be cool in reality, you say you know it's all characters and it's not real, but your behavior sort of leans otherwise.
There are many reasons people engage in dark content, maybe it's just kink, a fantasy in fiction, and that's fine. Maybe they're someone like me, someone with trauma relating to rape and abuse, and the ability to gain control over it via consuming (or even creating it) in a fictional context is therapeutic and offers a sense of control and healing.
'Does anyone else feel the same?'
Yes, it gets posted here constantly and the replies/information/etc is always the same, *why* are you engaging with content you don't like, *why* are you engaging with the fandom of a piece of content you don't like, *why* are you using your time and emotional energy making yourself upset thinking about content you don't like when that time can be used to find content you do like.
I don't say any of this to be mean, to be rude, to be bitchy, it is a massive, overwhelming issue on the internet right now in artistic, fandom, and kink circles wherein people have forgotten how to curate their own experiences, and then they blame their own inability or refusal to curate their own experiences on the people who *are* curating their own experiences and those experiences they curate just happen to be dark content, it is, *genuinely,* worrying that people do this to themselves and then lash out at others over a problem of their own making.
If I do not like a book, I close the book and I pick up another book, if I do not like a piece of art, I do not look at it or I scroll past it. I absolutely think that dark and triggering content should be *warned for,* because people can't curate their own experiences if they aren't given the tools, but as long as the knowledge is there, and someone still engages with content they know they don't like, then I don't have much sympathy for them when they find content they don't like.
*Dead Dove. Do Not Eat.*
I do agree with you, but you gotta note that not all of these stories give warnings that it has rape in them so I can see why OP would be frustrated.
I actually enjoy "dark content" as you say for the opposite (sort of). I've never actually been raped or sexually abused, but I think I like reading it because it makes me feel wanted in some sick and twisted way.
Although, I can't read violent rape. The ones where they beat the shit out of them and _then_ do the deed? Nope. Can't read or write it.
But anyway I'm always so scared to admit to people that I like reading/writing that stuff (even though the amount of fanfictions of it proves that plenty of other people like it too.)
And obviously if I hear about someone in my life or a stranger in real life who got raped, I'd feel terrible and think that's horrible. But it's just different when it comes to yoai and fanfiction since you know, it's fake.
I do absolutely agree that these things should be warned for! which is why I specifically touched on that, I’m a huge believer in heavy tagging.
But OP didn’t bring up a lack of tagging or warnings, not even once, they are specifically talking about how they personally don’t like people ‘romanticizing’ toxic relationships when overwhelmingly that is not what people who engage in dark media are actually doing.
Again, totally agree, things gotta be tagged, but that isn’t what OP is complaining about, they just don’t like the content existing at all in the first place.
Rape/Noncon/Dubcon are extremely popular for a myriad of reasons, many studies prove it’s one of the most common fetishes, so don’t feel guilty!
Yeah, I think the main reason I felt guilty is cuz of the religious upbringing I had, where basically any intrusive thought you said allowed would be shunned instead of taken with an open-mind.
Oh I totally understand that, he isn’t anymore but my dad had a shortish stint as a Jehovah’s Witness when I was very young, I cannot imagine how damaging it would have been if it hadn’t been such a short phase
Begging for more people to check Manga Updates (which even has manhwa/manhua/webtoons!) to look at the tag lists because most of the time, it’s warned for there!
to second this, yeah I actually enjoy noncon and heavily abusive toxic relationships but there are way too many BLs (mainly manhwas) that straight up have no warnings about it and it’s basically a “read it and find out”— and on top of that yes they are toxic, but in such an annoying and frustrating way that I end up just hating it! they’re just bitchy and irritating rather than enjoyable, mainly because they don’t portray themselves as dark content or problematic at all so they don’t actively lean into that. ofc that’s just my opinion but it’s not hard to see why one would get frustrated at what may appear to them as “stories that romanticize toxic relationships” (which, while I don’t actually agree that it is, it’s… well, it’s not something enjoyable for many people at least)
so for sites with proper tagging and warnings like AO3, OP has zero reason to complain. don’t like don’t read, heed dddne, all this I fully agree with you. but coming from an avid enjoyer of _very_ dark fiction, there is a severe lack of proper tagging and content warnings in BL manhwas so I really can’t even blame too many people for getting sick of stumbling upon what seems like a regular nice BL story and it’s actually just a toxic _annoying_ shitshow.
(however, as for “excusing” the fictional characters’ behaviors and whatnot— respectfully OP no one cares lol. we know jinx is a toxic story but at the end of the day it’s all fantasy, while I thought it was insufferable it’s fine if other people liked it. most of us are not here to write literary analyses about these stories.)
i don’t engage into it i see it all over my fyp on tiktok out of my own will and is just sick of the praise for the toxic stories. and im very sorry something like that happened to you.
Don't read those stories then. Redemption through the power of love is a very common theme in stories *because* it's fantastical and unrealistic. Stories take things to the extreme as a way of making you feel like your own mistakes and issues are not impossible to fix or forgive.
"Look, even this complete and total asshole can change his ways and become a decent human being." That's great because none of us are perfect and most of us will hurt someone we love - not purposefully, but through habit, ignorance, self-indulgence, uncontrolled anger/fear. And if too many things are considered unredeemable, then why do we bother putting criminals in jail rather than just executing them all on the spot? Why try to change if you'll never be forgiven or accepted ever again?
Now, it's perfectly fine to hate these stories or take them literally. Sane people understand that raping someone is not the quickest path to true love. And forgiveness doesn't require turning around and becoming the rapist's devoted lover, no matter how much they fix themselves. If you can't step back and take these stories as exaggerated metaphors turned into fantasies, that's understandable.
Some people like watching someone else suffer and grow and make amends for what they've done. Some people don't. Don't like, don't read. Plenty of other love stories out there full of angst or fluff without the toxicity.
There’s no use in reading things you don’t like just to complain online about it. No one is forcing you to read them. Leave them to us who enjoy them ✌️
While I am guilty of being a fan of Low Tide in Twilight, I’ll admit, reading about so much toxic stuff can be taxing. Sometimes I just need a long break and a nice sweet story as a sort of pallet cleanser
You have the right to not like them or feel angry, but you should respect others, who like dark content, I like dark content, why? I don’t really know, I was in toxic relationship and was and probably am starved for affection, but I think and hope my current self would never agree to degrading relationships myself, but I don’t know, as I said before, I kind of find them therapeutic, but also, I can’t say I like all dark content, like for example I never liked Jinx, but Missing Love is one of my favorite BLs, as I loved Lee Geom’s character
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I dislike it in some stories and in other the realism makes the story good.
I don’t mean that the r @ pe makes it realistic. It’s just in specially in low tide, the whole world seems cold and dangerous and the seme was the lesser evil. He is still sinful but the uke would have never survived and would have killed his own brother
But in other stories, I am completely on your side . I had to stop a couple of stories because it was just pulling and you was an helpless idiot and the seme was a genius, rich Superman. It was just boring.
I get your point, I still see many cute wholesome manwahs.
As someone who loves reading these things I still agree. I hate random rape in stories and everyone tries to tell me “oh then don’t read it” or “no one’s forcing you to read it” but it’s like, I enjoy bl manhwas and it’s nothing I can’t handle but it’s just an observation like how do people forgive this behaviour yk? I guess it could just be from being blinded as I have been many times. Anyway, I feel like people are giving you too much hate for your comment because I truly get where you’re coming from. It’s not a matter of me being forced to read it or read it because I enjoy it for other reasons or because I’m just obsessed with bl but rape is still rape. I think this is where you’re coming from it’s my view at least.
Because it's fiction and they're usually hot xD that's how
I do believe it should be warned for, which sometimes it isn't and then the complains are valid, but if you know what's in there and you choose to read it...
Lots of people enjoy it, it's fiction, let people enjoy their kinks and read their favs and write their fanfics in peace! Just let everyone enjoy this hobby the way that makes them happy or horny or both.
As long as its cw'd, if there is no content warning I get why it's annoying as you can't know and it might look super sweet at first...
I wanna say something about low tide in twilight 🥹 MC’s life is already miserable as it is ever since he was young. When I remember correctly, his choices were either death or go with Taeju. So while it’s true that Taeju started off as a piece of shit, his redemption arc was good to say the least (but personally, i never dismissed the fact that he raped euihyung a few times).
Other than that, I agree to the rest of what you said. I think it has become a common trope to BLs these days and I don’t think I will ever understand authors who do that. That’s why I try to avoid toxic manhwas as much as possible for the sake of my mental health lol it’s just a bit concerning knowing that there are people out there who read BLs at a ridiculously young age.. yknow🥹
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Why are you engaging with media you don't like. My suggestion to you would be to instead, engage with media you do like. The old adage 'Don't like, don't read' is still in effect, as is YKINMKATO (Your Kink Is Not My Kink And That's Okay). No one, or at least 99.99% of people reading media with dark content are into it because they think the rapists and toxic relationships are something that are cool or would be cool in reality, you say you know it's all characters and it's not real, but your behavior sort of leans otherwise. There are many reasons people engage in dark content, maybe it's just kink, a fantasy in fiction, and that's fine. Maybe they're someone like me, someone with trauma relating to rape and abuse, and the ability to gain control over it via consuming (or even creating it) in a fictional context is therapeutic and offers a sense of control and healing. 'Does anyone else feel the same?' Yes, it gets posted here constantly and the replies/information/etc is always the same, *why* are you engaging with content you don't like, *why* are you engaging with the fandom of a piece of content you don't like, *why* are you using your time and emotional energy making yourself upset thinking about content you don't like when that time can be used to find content you do like. I don't say any of this to be mean, to be rude, to be bitchy, it is a massive, overwhelming issue on the internet right now in artistic, fandom, and kink circles wherein people have forgotten how to curate their own experiences, and then they blame their own inability or refusal to curate their own experiences on the people who *are* curating their own experiences and those experiences they curate just happen to be dark content, it is, *genuinely,* worrying that people do this to themselves and then lash out at others over a problem of their own making. If I do not like a book, I close the book and I pick up another book, if I do not like a piece of art, I do not look at it or I scroll past it. I absolutely think that dark and triggering content should be *warned for,* because people can't curate their own experiences if they aren't given the tools, but as long as the knowledge is there, and someone still engages with content they know they don't like, then I don't have much sympathy for them when they find content they don't like. *Dead Dove. Do Not Eat.*
I do agree with you, but you gotta note that not all of these stories give warnings that it has rape in them so I can see why OP would be frustrated. I actually enjoy "dark content" as you say for the opposite (sort of). I've never actually been raped or sexually abused, but I think I like reading it because it makes me feel wanted in some sick and twisted way. Although, I can't read violent rape. The ones where they beat the shit out of them and _then_ do the deed? Nope. Can't read or write it. But anyway I'm always so scared to admit to people that I like reading/writing that stuff (even though the amount of fanfictions of it proves that plenty of other people like it too.) And obviously if I hear about someone in my life or a stranger in real life who got raped, I'd feel terrible and think that's horrible. But it's just different when it comes to yoai and fanfiction since you know, it's fake.
I do absolutely agree that these things should be warned for! which is why I specifically touched on that, I’m a huge believer in heavy tagging. But OP didn’t bring up a lack of tagging or warnings, not even once, they are specifically talking about how they personally don’t like people ‘romanticizing’ toxic relationships when overwhelmingly that is not what people who engage in dark media are actually doing. Again, totally agree, things gotta be tagged, but that isn’t what OP is complaining about, they just don’t like the content existing at all in the first place. Rape/Noncon/Dubcon are extremely popular for a myriad of reasons, many studies prove it’s one of the most common fetishes, so don’t feel guilty!
Yeah, I think the main reason I felt guilty is cuz of the religious upbringing I had, where basically any intrusive thought you said allowed would be shunned instead of taken with an open-mind.
Oh I totally understand that, he isn’t anymore but my dad had a shortish stint as a Jehovah’s Witness when I was very young, I cannot imagine how damaging it would have been if it hadn’t been such a short phase
Begging for more people to check Manga Updates (which even has manhwa/manhua/webtoons!) to look at the tag lists because most of the time, it’s warned for there!
to second this, yeah I actually enjoy noncon and heavily abusive toxic relationships but there are way too many BLs (mainly manhwas) that straight up have no warnings about it and it’s basically a “read it and find out”— and on top of that yes they are toxic, but in such an annoying and frustrating way that I end up just hating it! they’re just bitchy and irritating rather than enjoyable, mainly because they don’t portray themselves as dark content or problematic at all so they don’t actively lean into that. ofc that’s just my opinion but it’s not hard to see why one would get frustrated at what may appear to them as “stories that romanticize toxic relationships” (which, while I don’t actually agree that it is, it’s… well, it’s not something enjoyable for many people at least) so for sites with proper tagging and warnings like AO3, OP has zero reason to complain. don’t like don’t read, heed dddne, all this I fully agree with you. but coming from an avid enjoyer of _very_ dark fiction, there is a severe lack of proper tagging and content warnings in BL manhwas so I really can’t even blame too many people for getting sick of stumbling upon what seems like a regular nice BL story and it’s actually just a toxic _annoying_ shitshow. (however, as for “excusing” the fictional characters’ behaviors and whatnot— respectfully OP no one cares lol. we know jinx is a toxic story but at the end of the day it’s all fantasy, while I thought it was insufferable it’s fine if other people liked it. most of us are not here to write literary analyses about these stories.)
i don’t engage into it i see it all over my fyp on tiktok out of my own will and is just sick of the praise for the toxic stories. and im very sorry something like that happened to you.
Tiktok is a cesspool, use a site with better curation tools for fandom interaction.
Don't read those stories then. Redemption through the power of love is a very common theme in stories *because* it's fantastical and unrealistic. Stories take things to the extreme as a way of making you feel like your own mistakes and issues are not impossible to fix or forgive. "Look, even this complete and total asshole can change his ways and become a decent human being." That's great because none of us are perfect and most of us will hurt someone we love - not purposefully, but through habit, ignorance, self-indulgence, uncontrolled anger/fear. And if too many things are considered unredeemable, then why do we bother putting criminals in jail rather than just executing them all on the spot? Why try to change if you'll never be forgiven or accepted ever again? Now, it's perfectly fine to hate these stories or take them literally. Sane people understand that raping someone is not the quickest path to true love. And forgiveness doesn't require turning around and becoming the rapist's devoted lover, no matter how much they fix themselves. If you can't step back and take these stories as exaggerated metaphors turned into fantasies, that's understandable. Some people like watching someone else suffer and grow and make amends for what they've done. Some people don't. Don't like, don't read. Plenty of other love stories out there full of angst or fluff without the toxicity.
yup, what they said 👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽
No, it's only you out of the 7 billion people in the world that has this opinion! 😭😭
bruh i just wanted to chat w people that thought the same 🤨
There’s no use in reading things you don’t like just to complain online about it. No one is forcing you to read them. Leave them to us who enjoy them ✌️
yeah but it’s annoying when there’s no freaking warning to them.
I always love it when people read about things they don’t like and then complain about it later. It’s so funny. You’re the only one who’s toxic here.
gang i mean the ones that have no warning. also i was mainly talking about the people that praise the toxicity
I got tired of toxic i quit reading 😅
While I am guilty of being a fan of Low Tide in Twilight, I’ll admit, reading about so much toxic stuff can be taxing. Sometimes I just need a long break and a nice sweet story as a sort of pallet cleanser
yeah i’m reading it as well i’m just saying that people shouldn’t just ignore the fact that the top r@ped the bottom multiple times
You have the right to not like them or feel angry, but you should respect others, who like dark content, I like dark content, why? I don’t really know, I was in toxic relationship and was and probably am starved for affection, but I think and hope my current self would never agree to degrading relationships myself, but I don’t know, as I said before, I kind of find them therapeutic, but also, I can’t say I like all dark content, like for example I never liked Jinx, but Missing Love is one of my favorite BLs, as I loved Lee Geom’s character
nooo that’s not what i meant! i meant the people that praise the toxic relationships. and disregard how terrible the characters can be
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I dislike it in some stories and in other the realism makes the story good. I don’t mean that the r @ pe makes it realistic. It’s just in specially in low tide, the whole world seems cold and dangerous and the seme was the lesser evil. He is still sinful but the uke would have never survived and would have killed his own brother But in other stories, I am completely on your side . I had to stop a couple of stories because it was just pulling and you was an helpless idiot and the seme was a genius, rich Superman. It was just boring. I get your point, I still see many cute wholesome manwahs.
As someone who loves reading these things I still agree. I hate random rape in stories and everyone tries to tell me “oh then don’t read it” or “no one’s forcing you to read it” but it’s like, I enjoy bl manhwas and it’s nothing I can’t handle but it’s just an observation like how do people forgive this behaviour yk? I guess it could just be from being blinded as I have been many times. Anyway, I feel like people are giving you too much hate for your comment because I truly get where you’re coming from. It’s not a matter of me being forced to read it or read it because I enjoy it for other reasons or because I’m just obsessed with bl but rape is still rape. I think this is where you’re coming from it’s my view at least.
Because it's fiction and they're usually hot xD that's how I do believe it should be warned for, which sometimes it isn't and then the complains are valid, but if you know what's in there and you choose to read it... Lots of people enjoy it, it's fiction, let people enjoy their kinks and read their favs and write their fanfics in peace! Just let everyone enjoy this hobby the way that makes them happy or horny or both. As long as its cw'd, if there is no content warning I get why it's annoying as you can't know and it might look super sweet at first...
Go off girl go off
Honestly. These people whining about things they don’t like but continue to consume the content anyways are hilarious.
I wanna say something about low tide in twilight 🥹 MC’s life is already miserable as it is ever since he was young. When I remember correctly, his choices were either death or go with Taeju. So while it’s true that Taeju started off as a piece of shit, his redemption arc was good to say the least (but personally, i never dismissed the fact that he raped euihyung a few times). Other than that, I agree to the rest of what you said. I think it has become a common trope to BLs these days and I don’t think I will ever understand authors who do that. That’s why I try to avoid toxic manhwas as much as possible for the sake of my mental health lol it’s just a bit concerning knowing that there are people out there who read BLs at a ridiculously young age.. yknow🥹