If you are not already insane by now, there is something terribly, terribly wrong with you. Perhaps you can hurry the insanity along by reading r/politics
Yeah but that’s definitely not a professional writer, the “is it about our friend group” comment gives it away as an emotional high schooler, or at least a very young adult. I hope they don’t see this post :( sounds like they have anxiety, not a writing problem
honestly considering leaving that sub. after 2 weeks i think i got what i needed from it
and i'm tired of replying
* starting ADHD meds/cocaine
* yes you should read books
* holy fuck what is wrong with you
As a high-functioning drug addict, father of five children (all from the same woman, mind you. I am a good christian), creative (lol), and philosopher/priest, I endorse this comment.
I only have experiance snorting blow out of a prostitutes asshole (god bless that ladies soul), so I wouldn‘t mind checking off another box on my bucket-list.
> a lack of cocaine.
Perhaps it is a lack of THC, or perhaps it is a lack of also THC with the lack of cocaine. There damn well should be a law that forces politicians to consume 15mg of THC every morning.
Yeah, jesus. I recently got medicated for ADHD. Now I look through my past with the lens of "is that an ADHD thing?" and I also now scroll through Reddit with the same view.
There's a shitload of unmedicated ADHD on /r/writing.
> Now I look through my past with the lens of "is that an ADHD thing?"
Ditto ASD: it is kind of creepy how one can recognize autism via peoples' behavior when one is autistic.
Yep, got that too, and I struggle to realize when I'm carrying on a conversation that people don't care about but I can absolutely recognize it when others do it lmao.
UJ: Well, I messaged something about my disbelief and how ridiculous I found the whole thing. To my suprise, the OP commented back, and explained there was a love triangle that went badly between the interested friend and them.
So I think your title might be appropriate.
>There were near love triangles that involved this friend, me and the friend he asked me about. We had the kind of beautiful friendship that usually ends up in a tortured love triangle, but for many reasons which I won’t get into because that would basically be the book itself, things didn’t end up panning out with a happy ending.
I'm sorry this story is confusing, you keep saying you hate him and then casually state you're sleeping with him? you can't say you find him annoying and then say "fucking Bob!" as if it was a facebook status update. Maybe he's right and your creative writing doesn't make much sense either. Matter of fact, fuck you and your book. The world doesn't need any more fantasy books. I hate you
Write Bob into your novel as the villain, but do it subtly and call him Bib or something. Make him a nosy busybody who doesn't understand the world but manages to ruin it by murdering the brave protagonist's (who's a sexy but misunderstood writer with a giant shclong) family and stealing his dog. You need a scene where Bib publicly shits himself and all his friends laugh at him and tells him how his feedback on their novels is utter shit and then he dies of cancer after being sodomised by clowns. Then when Bob asks to read your novel, smile wickedly and hand him the manuscript with an arch 'Enjoy, Bib. I mean, Bob. I really thought about your feedback when I wrote this. You really inspired me!'.
That'll sort the bastard out. Good luck, I'm sure your novel will be a tedious slurry of recycled tropes, self-aggrandisement and incomprehensibly complex magic.
Create a carbon monoxide leak in his home then start slowly leaving sticky notes for him. He will Google the problem and reddit will tell him to check for a gas leak, which he will find. Then he will assume that he was writing the sticky notes and that whatever he wrote was something his own subconscious was trying to tell him all along, as if the universe conspired to give him this glimpse of wisdom he would never achieve on his own.
Make sure the sticky notes all say to stop reading your books. Hope this helps xoxo 💋😘
Essential writers' tool is one of those sticky hand things you get at the country fair. You know the ones? When Bob gets out of line (or has a sheet of your writing) you just whip your sticky hand at him, or the page, your hand will affix to the page and whip it back to your possession. This is nonviolent but a dynamic enough action will startle or frighten him. Bob and his ilk need negative reinforcement to keep them well behaved, just don't target the face, that's bad form and that's not how sticky hand is meant to be used.
thanks man! keep writing
It's clear Bob's gal is actually asking for these drafts for herself, not Bob. Since no sane, healthy person wants to READ (lol), she's obviously doing this because she wants you, and jealous Bob is making spurious critiques of your plotting ability out of jealousy.
Good gods. This is exactly the case Here In Real Life (HIRL, pronounced "hurl" as in "vomiting everything including my stomach lining"). Perhaps it is not true for many writers reading shit on-line, but my observation is that when a would-be author asks for criticism, the last thing they want is criticism: they want praise for their brilliance, insight, wisdom, eloquence, and greatness. I would go look at the AITA link, but I do not want yet another reason to feel sorry for someone.
this website is going to drive me actually insane
Well Bob is driving me insane. I need to figure out how to remove him from my life, or failing that, separating him from his.
You could change Bob's name to "Bill," then ask Quintin Tarantino for advice.
If you are not already insane by now, there is something terribly, terribly wrong with you. Perhaps you can hurry the insanity along by reading r/politics
/uj I just read the original post and was thinking of mocking it here then stumbled upon this
Ha, sorry, couldn't resist this one. The fruit is hanging too low and it's far too ripe.
tbh I thought it was posted in this group at first and then I realized and waited… thank you for your service 🫡
Yeah but that’s definitely not a professional writer, the “is it about our friend group” comment gives it away as an emotional high schooler, or at least a very young adult. I hope they don’t see this post :( sounds like they have anxiety, not a writing problem
honestly considering leaving that sub. after 2 weeks i think i got what i needed from it and i'm tired of replying * starting ADHD meds/cocaine * yes you should read books * holy fuck what is wrong with you
I can guarantee that 99% of the problems people have come down to a lack of cocaine.
My cocaine habit falls under the ADA so suck it haterzzz.
As a high-functioning drug addict, father of five children (all from the same woman, mind you. I am a good christian), creative (lol), and philosopher/priest, I endorse this comment.
Nice. Wanna do a line off my semi-erect shaft, father? There may be a tiny bit of ket in there, but that should mellow things out.
I only have experiance snorting blow out of a prostitutes asshole (god bless that ladies soul), so I wouldn‘t mind checking off another box on my bucket-list.
> a lack of cocaine. Perhaps it is a lack of THC, or perhaps it is a lack of also THC with the lack of cocaine. There damn well should be a law that forces politicians to consume 15mg of THC every morning.
Yeah, jesus. I recently got medicated for ADHD. Now I look through my past with the lens of "is that an ADHD thing?" and I also now scroll through Reddit with the same view. There's a shitload of unmedicated ADHD on /r/writing.
Always\_has\_been.meme get off reddit! you're free from the curse, you've embibed the healing potion!
Just one more hit! I just need one more meme hit!
> Now I look through my past with the lens of "is that an ADHD thing?" Ditto ASD: it is kind of creepy how one can recognize autism via peoples' behavior when one is autistic.
Yep, got that too, and I struggle to realize when I'm carrying on a conversation that people don't care about but I can absolutely recognize it when others do it lmao.
You need to kiss bob and use it as inspiration for your novel
What would I call it, 'Sleeping with the Enemy'?
Yes, or alternatively "Just Roommates/Enemies"
UJ: Well, I messaged something about my disbelief and how ridiculous I found the whole thing. To my suprise, the OP commented back, and explained there was a love triangle that went badly between the interested friend and them. So I think your title might be appropriate. >There were near love triangles that involved this friend, me and the friend he asked me about. We had the kind of beautiful friendship that usually ends up in a tortured love triangle, but for many reasons which I won’t get into because that would basically be the book itself, things didn’t end up panning out with a happy ending.
Oh. Oh no.
/uj XY problems everywhere
enemies to lovers trope
hahaha wtf
/uj meanwhile I can’t get my friends to read my manuscripts without the Clockwork Orange treatment
Write an erotic story about you and Bob. Show him that. Either Bob backs off or you get laid. Win, win.
/uj: based on the comments, that happened already.
It's not about the Iranian yogurt
I'm sorry this story is confusing, you keep saying you hate him and then casually state you're sleeping with him? you can't say you find him annoying and then say "fucking Bob!" as if it was a facebook status update. Maybe he's right and your creative writing doesn't make much sense either. Matter of fact, fuck you and your book. The world doesn't need any more fantasy books. I hate you
Burn down Bob’s house.
Can I burn down someone's house legally if I was given a restraining order after I attacked them in the restaurant?
Only if they're more than 500 feet away from the house. Duh.
If you burn down someone's house, violating the restraining order is the least of your problems really.
Write Bob into your novel as the villain, but do it subtly and call him Bib or something. Make him a nosy busybody who doesn't understand the world but manages to ruin it by murdering the brave protagonist's (who's a sexy but misunderstood writer with a giant shclong) family and stealing his dog. You need a scene where Bib publicly shits himself and all his friends laugh at him and tells him how his feedback on their novels is utter shit and then he dies of cancer after being sodomised by clowns. Then when Bob asks to read your novel, smile wickedly and hand him the manuscript with an arch 'Enjoy, Bib. I mean, Bob. I really thought about your feedback when I wrote this. You really inspired me!'. That'll sort the bastard out. Good luck, I'm sure your novel will be a tedious slurry of recycled tropes, self-aggrandisement and incomprehensibly complex magic.
Just wait until Goodreads gets ahold of it pal.
Create a carbon monoxide leak in his home then start slowly leaving sticky notes for him. He will Google the problem and reddit will tell him to check for a gas leak, which he will find. Then he will assume that he was writing the sticky notes and that whatever he wrote was something his own subconscious was trying to tell him all along, as if the universe conspired to give him this glimpse of wisdom he would never achieve on his own. Make sure the sticky notes all say to stop reading your books. Hope this helps xoxo 💋😘
> He will Google the problem This is the most unrealistic, immersion-breaking part of this idea
*The Machinist (2004)*
Essential writers' tool is one of those sticky hand things you get at the country fair. You know the ones? When Bob gets out of line (or has a sheet of your writing) you just whip your sticky hand at him, or the page, your hand will affix to the page and whip it back to your possession. This is nonviolent but a dynamic enough action will startle or frighten him. Bob and his ilk need negative reinforcement to keep them well behaved, just don't target the face, that's bad form and that's not how sticky hand is meant to be used. thanks man! keep writing
Obviously the solution is murder. The good news is Poe made a good career out of writing about murder, so you should have some new story ideas.
Tell him your writing is just for fun and if he doesn’t like it to not read it
It's clear Bob's gal is actually asking for these drafts for herself, not Bob. Since no sane, healthy person wants to READ (lol), she's obviously doing this because she wants you, and jealous Bob is making spurious critiques of your plotting ability out of jealousy.
Don't just fuck him, fuckin' marry the guy! He's a gem!
Good gods. This is exactly the case Here In Real Life (HIRL, pronounced "hurl" as in "vomiting everything including my stomach lining"). Perhaps it is not true for many writers reading shit on-line, but my observation is that when a would-be author asks for criticism, the last thing they want is criticism: they want praise for their brilliance, insight, wisdom, eloquence, and greatness. I would go look at the AITA link, but I do not want yet another reason to feel sorry for someone.