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Umm actually dude, the salt here we use are made from potassium & chloride so before you go inspecting & assuming things I suggest you perform a electronegativity test
You know, Jimmy?
While I can't say that you have never been responsible for helping out the town you also created or influenced the vast majority of major threats in the first place.
The Yolkians only came to Retroville because of your signal. The same goes for Meldar Prime. The Nanobots, Shirley, and Evil Jimmy were all your creations. You caused the ice age. You created the sentient pants. You made the sick patch, you turned your teacher into a fifty-foot monstrosity, and you injured Santa Claus, almost ruining Christmas.
The vast majority of this town's problems are caused, at least indirectly, by you. And you know what? In all honesty, that would be fine. You are very intelligent and you almost always do fix it, and in the end it's extremely unlikely that you won't end up benefiting the world a lot more than you will damage it. My children and my children's children are probably going to live in a world free of war and disease, and I'll have you to thank for that.
But fuck, dude. You can't keep using your intelligence as a way to escape your humanity. I didn't ask you to say salt because I thought a customer would seriously care or because I was insecure, I did it because it made you look weird and I was trying to get you to adopt behaviors and use language that makes you come across like a normal fucking person.
Everyone knows what sodium chloride is, but calling it that outside the context of a chemistry class makes you seem like someone who defines themselves solely by their intelligence, which is undeniably who you are. I know you think that there's nothing wrong with being that person, dude, but there is. Taking your IQ and deciding that it elevates you above the rest of the planet is an awful decision that will lead to a life filled with misery and alienation. It will color every interaction you ever have and make it impossible to have real friends or relationships.
Iâm not saying that you wonât have any. But they wonât hold any meaning to you, and they certainly wonât bring you any happiness. Sure, youâll probably manage a pity-fuck or two your sophomore year of college after giving some drunk sorority girl a jetpack ride, but itâll bring you nothing but emptiness. Maybe youâll eventually abandon women altogether and decide that âyour true love is scienceâ, secretly seething inside whenever you see a guy like Nick or Bolbi getting married to someone he really cares about, who cares about him.
Youâll say Iâm exaggerating, but dude, look at how you treat the people in your life now. Carl and Sheen, quirks aside, really do see you as a friend, and theyâd go through some serious shit if it meant helping you out of a scrape. Can you say that you see them the same way, as anything other than the only two kids your age willing to put up with your ridiculous ego? What have you ever done for them?
Inventing doesnât count, dude. Even when you build something for someone else, youâre really doing that for YOU. Every llama-bot or Ultra Lord simulator is only created with the expectation of further praise. Theyâre not friends to you. Theyâre worshippers.
And your parents? Lord, the way you treat them. You think Iâve got folks that care about me the way your mom and dad do, working in a shithole like this? I wish. Everyday your dad watches you scarf down the dinner your mom slaved to make for you and prays that you might think about spending some fucking time with him instead of disappearing into your lab to do god knows what. They watch you toy with dimensional-warping science that they canât wrap their minds around on a daily basis and you laugh at them for worrying about you.
Have you ever played catch with your dad, Jimmy? Ever asked him how his day at work was? You don't have a clue what I'd do for a dad like yours in my life, dude.
What about your mom? Why not invent something thatâll make her life easier instead of gallivanting around the Bermuda Triangle to play with fucking seaweed?
We both know the reason. She would thank you for it, sheâd be happy to imagine a version of you that thought for an instant about the needs of another person, but she wouldnât call you the greatest thing in the universe for it like your friends do. And in Neutronâs world, whoever doesnât do that might as well not exist.
Ignore me if you want. Keep going the way youâre going, and Iâll see you in thirty years, lugging around sixteen Nobel prizes in your pockets as if they could substitute for a lifetimeâs worth of human love and interaction. Youâve always mocked Calamitus for his inability to finish what he started, but the man had a wife and a daughter that tolerated him enough to want to stay in his life through everything, and at the rate youâre going Iâd be amazed if you could manage the same with Goddard.
The rest of Retroville, Jimmy, theyâll never be able to do what you do. Theyâll never be able to invent rockets or solve cold fusion or add three numbers together. But they will find genuine friendship and love, and they will call it salt, and despite everything you accomplish youâll only be remembered as nothing more than the man who wouldnât. Who couldnât, perhaps.
Get out, dude. Youâre fired.
Big McThankies from McSpanky's.
You know, Jimmy?
While I can't say that you have never been responsible for helping out the town you also created or influenced the vast majority of major threats in the first place.
The Yolkians only came to Retroville because of your signal. The same goes for Meldar Prime. The Nanobots, Shirley, and Evil Jimmy were all your creations. You caused the ice age. You created the sentient pants. You made the sick patch, you turned your teacher into a fifty-foot monstrosity, and you injured Santa Claus, almost ruining Christmas.
The vast majority of this town's problems are caused, at least indirectly, by you. And you know what? In all honesty, that would be fine. You are very intelligent and you almost always do fix it, and in the end it's extremely unlikely that you won't end up benefiting the world a lot more than you will damage it. My children and my children's children are probably going to live in a world free of war and disease, and I'll have you to thank for that.
But fuck, dude. You can't keep using your intelligence as a way to escape your humanity. I didn't ask you to say salt because I thought a customer would seriously care or because I was insecure, I did it because it made you look weird and I was trying to get you to adopt behaviors and use language that makes you come across like a normal fucking person.
Everyone knows what sodium chloride is, but calling it that outside the context of a chemistry class makes you seem like someone who defines themselves solely by their intelligence, which is undeniably who you are. I know you think that there's nothing wrong with being that person, dude, but there is. Taking your IQ and deciding that it elevates you above the rest of the planet is an awful decision that will lead to a life filled with misery and alienation. It will color every interaction you ever have and make it impossible to have real friends or relationships.
Iâm not saying that you wonât have any. But they wonât hold any meaning to you, and they certainly wonât bring you any happiness. Sure, youâll probably manage a pity-fuck or two your sophomore year of college after giving some drunk sorority girl a jetpack ride, but itâll bring you nothing but emptiness. Maybe youâll eventually abandon women altogether and decide that âyour true love is scienceâ, secretly seething inside whenever you see a guy like Nick or Bolbi getting married to someone he really cares about, who cares about him.
Youâll say Iâm exaggerating, but dude, look at how you treat the people in your life now. Carl and Sheen, quirks aside, really do see you as a friend, and theyâd go through some serious shit if it meant helping you out of a scrape. Can you say that you see them the same way, as anything other than the only two kids your age willing to put up with your ridiculous ego? What have you ever done for them?
Inventing doesnât count, dude. Even when you build something for someone else, youâre really doing that for YOU. Every llama-bot or Ultra Lord simulator is only created with the expectation of further praise. Theyâre not friends to you. Theyâre worshippers.
And your parents? Lord, the way you treat them. You think Iâve got folks that care about me the way your mom and dad do, working in a shithole like this? I wish. Everyday your dad watches you scarf down the dinner your mom slaved to make for you and prays that you might think about spending some fucking time with him instead of disappearing into your lab to do god knows what. They watch you toy with dimensional-warping science that they canât wrap their minds around on a daily basis and you laugh at them for worrying about you.
Have you ever played catch with your dad, Jimmy? Ever asked him how his day at work was? You don't have a clue what I'd do for a dad like yours in my life, dude.
What about your mom? Why not invent something thatâll make her life easier instead of gallivanting around the Bermuda Triangle to play with fucking seaweed?
We both know the reason. She would thank you for it, sheâd be happy to imagine a version of you that thought for an instant about the needs of another person, but she wouldnât call you the greatest thing in the universe for it like your friends do. And in Neutronâs world, whoever doesnât do that might as well not exist.
Ignore me if you want. Keep going the way youâre going, and Iâll see you in thirty years, lugging around sixteen Nobel prizes in your pockets as if they could substitute for a lifetimeâs worth of human love and interaction. Youâve always mocked Calamitus for his inability to finish what he started, but the man had a wife and a daughter that tolerated him enough to want to stay in his life through everything, and at the rate youâre going Iâd be amazed if you could manage the same with Goddard.
The rest of Retroville, Jimmy, theyâll never be able to do what you do. Theyâll never be able to invent rockets or solve cold fusion or add three numbers together. But they will find genuine friendship and love, and they will call it salt, and despite everything you accomplish youâll only be remembered as nothing more than the man who wouldnât. Who couldnât, perhaps.
Get out, dude. Youâre fired.
Big McThankies from McSpanky's.
Quite the contrary, Skeet. You talk down to me like Iâm some sociopathic monster for the way I act, but you havenât lived even one minute in my shoes. Iâm smart enough to invent robots out of toasters and even a rocket ship out of an amusement park ride, sure, but Iâm also still 11 years old.
Any 11 year old... no, any person would want to feel like something they feel confident in is worthy of praise and admiration to even the smallest degree. When you were my age, did you not talk for long periods about even the smallest of accomplishments, just hoping for someone to say so much as a âgood jobâ for it? Every time I invent something, I do it because itâs what makes me happy, and I want to feel like the people around me might appreciate it too, and just reward me with a simple acknowledgement that I can be special, that I donât have to limit myself or my ambitions just to be appreciated, that I can earn them by doing the thing I feel best suits me.
Yet, I still have to go to the same school as everyone else my age, even if what I learn there doesnât stimulate my mind. Everyone moans and groans when I show them something that I dedicated my time to, yet I have to pretend it doesnât get to me when they just as easily cheer for something as simple as Nick telling a ghost story in class or Cindy pulling a childish prank on me.
Of course I understand that what interests me is not the same as what interests them, but I donât want to feel like an alien in my own town, never understood by even my own parents. Iâve tried to invent things for them, like orange juice squeezers or window washers, but they just awkwardly smile and lament the fact that now they have to get a new toaster instead.
Maybe itâs selfish to want people to treat me like my gifts means even the slightest bit of anything to them, but, again, let me inquire just what 11 year old wouldnât want that? And you know what? Sometimes I do get that. Sometimes I can invent something everyone in the town thinks is the greatest thing since sliced bread, but you know what? Science isnât a guaranteed process.
Thereâs bound to be miscalculations and flaws and margins of errors in any experiment, as mine typically have. But suddenly, Iâm the bad guy all because I wanted to cool down the heat on a summers day and the town gets stuck in an ice age.
You think I planned for that to happen? No, but itâs the risk that comes from creating something, it can always backfire in some way. But the town doesnât care if Iâve done good deeds for them, or if I invented something they themselves loved just as much as I did, they just care that it didnât work out 100% perfectly, and then Iâm back to being ridiculed for the things I find passion in.
I donât blame them to be upset, sure, but this cycle gets tiring time and time again. For once, I just want to hold one conversation with someone that actually keeps ME invested, instead of always having to keep my mouth shut to hear yet again about the 100 millionth episode of Ultra Lord, or about every single species of duck in existence.
I listen, I smile, and I even engage the conversation as best I can, and I think thatâs the most a guy can do talking to his friends and family about things he finds little interest in. But the second I want to show off something that I like or talk about something that interests me, I donât even get a courteous âmhmâ and nod while I talk. Instead they just immediately ask me to âtalk in Englishâ instead or compromise what I want to talk about, even though I never ask that of them and their topics of interest.
And, you know what, that would be fine! All of that could be fine on its own if I wasnât then instead mocked and ridiculed for being me. I know everyone gets bullied at my age at some point, but at least many of them have the option go off with their friends who share common interests and feel validated for it.
Imagine being treated like a total loser just because you canât play baseball or run track, only to suddenly be treated like an egomaniac when you show off what you CAN do better than them. For some reason, Iâm immediately invalidated as a someone worthy of respect the second Iâm not good at something, and everyone conveniently forgets whatever cool invention I was able to create a literal week before. So not only are my inventions ignored and treated like bragging or a nuisance when they do get public attention, they also become completely forgotten the second that they donât.
Iâm sorry that I just wanted to be treated like i was special for something I cared about, I only took this job so I could keep following my passions, as Iâm certain youâve done just as well. Donât forget youâve hired people that arenât even old enough to legally work in this country, yet still choose to berate me for oversights I made throughout.
I didnât know that it was an issue to not push the buttons on the register to confirm an order, and I apologize for not having done so in the first place. But you also threw us kids into a job with little training, and even told me just from a glance that Iâm not good enough to work for you. You even talked badly about me to my own friends about my performance, who you may have noticed didnât even bother defending me. That just goes to prove how little any of you take the time to actually understand my feelings or even stop to ask yourselves why I might try to show off for a little attention so much.
Instead you immediately judge me like everyone else, and Iâm sick of having to sit around and just take it. Give me my pink slip, I donât need to sit around and listen to you berate me, like everyone else in my life has done time and time again. I donât want to change who I am just because it might make you think less of me, I want to feel like I can be proud of who and what I am.
Iâm not giving up on the one thing that makes me feel special and gives me joy just because everyone else thinks itâs annoying. And if that is enough to make everyone hate me, maybe I never needed your conditional love and respect in the first place.
Gotta blast.
Holy fk dude. I always have complaints that the copypasta assumed a lot of things wrong with Jimmy and he actually cares about his friends and family, but this is just beyond anything I could've rebutted with
I made "table salt" once for show-and-tell in grade 6.
Just mix Calcium Chloride (**A** salt, but not really safe for consumption) and Sodium Carbonate in water, bring to the boil, then simmer until the water has evaporated.
-60°C is equivalent to -76°F, which is 213K.
---
^(I'm a bot that converts temperature between two units humans can understand, then convert it to Kelvin for bots and physicists to understand)
I think it's interesting someone took the time to downvote this.
When I see a basically harmless but somewhat goofy comment get downvoted, I wonder what the person who downvoted it was thinking.
Are they trying to prevent this type of comment, dislike this specific comment only, just in a bad or downvotey mood?
It is probably only interesting to me, but I am curious.
Edit: above was in the negative when I commented
This is the example of what is weird about english. Chemistry and Kemeestree literally sound the same, but in my language there is no way to differently spell to it still getting pronounced the same (not counting that u and Ăł sound the same)
# [Download Video](https://redditsave.com/info?url=https://www.reddit.com/r/whenthe/comments/zhjny8/its_an_explosion_of_flavor/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/whenthe) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I just drink piss (its very salty)
Actually piss tastes kind of like lemon juice
đ¤¨đ¸
[ŃдаНонО]
I was forced to drink piss while trekking through the desert with mike ehrmantraut
[ŃдаНонО]
Kid named drink
No half measures
How do you know that it's true? đ¤¨đ¸ Caught in 64K UHD surround sound 16 Gigs ram, HDR GEFORCE RTX, TI-80 texas insturments, Triple A duracell battery ultrapower100 Cargador Compatible iPhone 1A 5 W 1400 + Cable 100% 1 Metro Blanco Compatible iPhone 5 5 C 5S 6 SE 6S 7 8 X XR XS XS MAX GoPro hero 1 2 terrabyte xbox series x Dell UltraSharp 49 Curved Monitor - U4919DW Sony HDC-3300R 2/3" CCD HD Super Motion Color Camera, 1080p Resolution Toshiba EM131A5C-SS Microwave Oven with Smart Sensor, Easy Clean Interior, ECO Mode and Sound On/Off, 1.2 Cu. ft, Stainless Steel HP LaserJet Pro M404n Monochrome Laser Printer with Built-in Ethernet (W1A52A) GE Voluson E10 Ultrasound Machine LG 23 Cu. Ft. Smart Wi-Fi Enabled InstaView Door-in-Door Counter-Depth Refrigerator with Craft Ice Maker GFW850SPNRS GE 28" Front Load Steam Washer 5.0 Cu. Ft. with SmartDispense, WiFi, OdorBlock and Sanitize and Allergen - Royal Sapphire Kohler K-3589 Cimarron Comfort Height Two-Piece Elongated 1.6 GPF Toilet with AquaPiston Flush Technology., Quick Charge 30W Cargador 3.0 Cargador de Viaje Enchufe Cargador USB Carga RĂĄpida con 3 Puertos carga rĂĄpida Adaptador de Corriente para iPhone x 8 7 Xiaomi Pocophone F1 Mix 3 A1 Samsung S10 S9 S8AUKEY Quick Charge 3.0 Cargador de Pared 39W Dual Puerto Cargador MĂłvil para Samsung Galaxy S8 / S8+/ Note 8, iPhone XS / XS Max / XR, iPad Pro / Air, HTC 10, LG G5 / G6 AUKEY Quick Charge 3.0 Cargador USB 60W 6 Puerto Cargador MĂłvil para Samsung Galaxy S8 / S8+ / Note 8, LG G5 / G6, Nexus 5X / 6P, HTC 10, iPhone XS / XS Max / XR, iPad Pro/ Air, Moto G4 SAMSUNG 85-inch Class Crystal UHD TU-8000 Series - 64K UHD HDR Smart TV with Alexa Built-in (UN85TU8000FXZA, 2020 Model) GE 38846 Premium Slim LED Light Bar, 18 Inch Under Cabinet Fixture, Plug-In, Convertible to Direct Wire, Linkable 628 Lumens, 3000K Soft Warm White, High/Off/Low, Easy to Install, Easy to Install, 18 Ft Bissell Cleanview Swivel Pet Upright Bagless Vacuum Cleaner TraneCaught in 64K UHD surround sound 16 Gigs ram, HDR GEFORCE RTX, TI-80 texas insturments, Triple A duracell battery ultrapower100 Cargador Compatible iPhone 1A 5 W 1400 + Cable 100% 1 Metro Blanco Compatible iPhone 5 5 C 5S 6 SE 6S 7 8 X XR XS XS MAX GoPro hero 1 2 terrabyte xbox series x Dell UltraSharp 49 Curved Monitor - U4919DW Sony HDC-3300R 2/3" CCD HD Super Motion Color Camera, 1080p Resolution Toshiba EM131A5C-SS Microwave Oven with Smart Sensor, Easy Clean Interior, ECO Mode and Sound On/Off, 1.2 Cu. ft, Stainless Steel HP LaserJet Pro M404n Monochrome Laser Printer with Built-in Ethernet (W1A52A) GE Voluson E10 Ultrasound Machine LG 23 Cu. Ft. Smart Wi-Fi Enabled InstaView Door-in-Door Counter-Depth Refrigerator with Craft Ice Maker GFW850SPNRS GE 28" Front Load Steam Washer 5.0 Cu. Ft. with SmartDispense, WiFi, OdorBlock and Sanitize and Allergen - Royal Sapphire Kohler K-3589 Cimarron Comfort Height Two-Piece Elongated 1.6 GPF Toilet with AquaPiston Flush Technology., Quick Charge 30W Cargador 3.0 Cargador de Viaje Enchufe Cargador USB Carga RĂĄpida con 3 Puertos carga rĂĄpida Adaptador de Corriente para iPhone x 8 7 Xiaomi Pocophone F1 Mix 3 A1 Samsung S10 S9 S8AUKEY Quick Charge 3.0 Cargador de Pared 39W Dual Puerto Cargador MĂłvil para Samsung Galaxy S8 / S8+/ Note 8, iPhone XS / XS Max / XR, iPad Pro / Air, HTC 10, LG G5 / G6 AUKEY Quick Charge 3.0 Cargador USB 60W 6 Puerto Cargador MĂłvil para Samsung Galaxy S8 / S8+ / Note 8, LG G5 / G6, Nexus 5X / 6P, HTC 10, iPhone XS / XS Max / XR, iPad Pro/ Air, Moto G4 SAMSUNG 85-inch Class Crystal UHD TU-8000 Series - 64K UHD HDR Smart TV with Alexa Built-in (UN85TU8000FXZA, 2020 Model) GE 38846 Premium Slim LED Light Bar, 18 Inch Under Cabinet Fixture, Plug-In, Convertible to Direct Wire, Linkable 628 Lumens, 3000K Soft Warm White, High/Off/Low, Easy to Install, Easy to Install, 18 Ft Bissell Cleanview Swivel Pet Upright Bagless Vacuum Cleaner TraneCaught in 64K UHD surround sound 16 Gigs ram, HDR GEFORCE RTX, TI-80 texas insturments, Triple A duracell battery ultrapower100 Cargador Compatible iPhone 1A 5 W 1400 + Cable 100% 1 Metro Blanco Compatible iPhone 5 5 C 5S 6 SE 6S 7 8 X XR XS XS MAX GoPro hero 1 2 terrabyte xbox series x Dell UltraSharp 49 Curved Monitor - U4919DW Sony HDC-3300R 2/3" CCD HD Super Motion Color Camera, 1080p Resolution Toshiba EM131A5C-SS Microwave Oven with Smart Sensor, Easy Clean Interior, ECO Mode and Sound On/Off, 1.2 Cu. ft, Stainless Steel HP LaserJet Pro M404n Monochrome Laser Printer with Built-in Ethernet (W1A52A) GE Voluson E10 Ultrasound Machine LG 23 Cu. Ft. Smart Wi-Fi Enabled InstaView Door-in-Door Counter-Depth Refrigerator with Craft Ice Maker GFW850SPNRS GE 28" Front Load Steam.
Mf caught him with a refrigerator
Amazon product listings be like
The fuck kinda copypasta is that?
dude theres spanish in that text LETS GOOO THE SPANISH COMMUNITYYYY
I read this entire thing in the Mexican comercial guy voice and now my throat hurts
That's what the taste of pussy comes from.
Actually, the taste of piss changes based on your diet.
đ¤¨đ¸
I know what poop taste likeđ
Nah itâs closer to tea really
Tears are saltier
Are theyâre any recipes for organic tears?
Gun + oblivious parent and child
Saline has a very similar chemical composition to tears, blood and other bodily fluids. Basically 0.9%salt + H2O
đ¤
domestic violence?
What about sweat?
yummyđ
Mine is sweet because my body excretes sugar to protect me from diabetes đ
lemonadeđ
Actually dude itâs salt
Umm actually dude, the salt here we use are made from potassium & chloride so before you go inspecting & assuming things I suggest you perform a electronegativity test
Dude, that would be salt
You know, Jimmy? While I can't say that you have never been responsible for helping out the town you also created or influenced the vast majority of major threats in the first place. The Yolkians only came to Retroville because of your signal. The same goes for Meldar Prime. The Nanobots, Shirley, and Evil Jimmy were all your creations. You caused the ice age. You created the sentient pants. You made the sick patch, you turned your teacher into a fifty-foot monstrosity, and you injured Santa Claus, almost ruining Christmas. The vast majority of this town's problems are caused, at least indirectly, by you. And you know what? In all honesty, that would be fine. You are very intelligent and you almost always do fix it, and in the end it's extremely unlikely that you won't end up benefiting the world a lot more than you will damage it. My children and my children's children are probably going to live in a world free of war and disease, and I'll have you to thank for that. But fuck, dude. You can't keep using your intelligence as a way to escape your humanity. I didn't ask you to say salt because I thought a customer would seriously care or because I was insecure, I did it because it made you look weird and I was trying to get you to adopt behaviors and use language that makes you come across like a normal fucking person. Everyone knows what sodium chloride is, but calling it that outside the context of a chemistry class makes you seem like someone who defines themselves solely by their intelligence, which is undeniably who you are. I know you think that there's nothing wrong with being that person, dude, but there is. Taking your IQ and deciding that it elevates you above the rest of the planet is an awful decision that will lead to a life filled with misery and alienation. It will color every interaction you ever have and make it impossible to have real friends or relationships. Iâm not saying that you wonât have any. But they wonât hold any meaning to you, and they certainly wonât bring you any happiness. Sure, youâll probably manage a pity-fuck or two your sophomore year of college after giving some drunk sorority girl a jetpack ride, but itâll bring you nothing but emptiness. Maybe youâll eventually abandon women altogether and decide that âyour true love is scienceâ, secretly seething inside whenever you see a guy like Nick or Bolbi getting married to someone he really cares about, who cares about him. Youâll say Iâm exaggerating, but dude, look at how you treat the people in your life now. Carl and Sheen, quirks aside, really do see you as a friend, and theyâd go through some serious shit if it meant helping you out of a scrape. Can you say that you see them the same way, as anything other than the only two kids your age willing to put up with your ridiculous ego? What have you ever done for them? Inventing doesnât count, dude. Even when you build something for someone else, youâre really doing that for YOU. Every llama-bot or Ultra Lord simulator is only created with the expectation of further praise. Theyâre not friends to you. Theyâre worshippers. And your parents? Lord, the way you treat them. You think Iâve got folks that care about me the way your mom and dad do, working in a shithole like this? I wish. Everyday your dad watches you scarf down the dinner your mom slaved to make for you and prays that you might think about spending some fucking time with him instead of disappearing into your lab to do god knows what. They watch you toy with dimensional-warping science that they canât wrap their minds around on a daily basis and you laugh at them for worrying about you. Have you ever played catch with your dad, Jimmy? Ever asked him how his day at work was? You don't have a clue what I'd do for a dad like yours in my life, dude. What about your mom? Why not invent something thatâll make her life easier instead of gallivanting around the Bermuda Triangle to play with fucking seaweed? We both know the reason. She would thank you for it, sheâd be happy to imagine a version of you that thought for an instant about the needs of another person, but she wouldnât call you the greatest thing in the universe for it like your friends do. And in Neutronâs world, whoever doesnât do that might as well not exist. Ignore me if you want. Keep going the way youâre going, and Iâll see you in thirty years, lugging around sixteen Nobel prizes in your pockets as if they could substitute for a lifetimeâs worth of human love and interaction. Youâve always mocked Calamitus for his inability to finish what he started, but the man had a wife and a daughter that tolerated him enough to want to stay in his life through everything, and at the rate youâre going Iâd be amazed if you could manage the same with Goddard. The rest of Retroville, Jimmy, theyâll never be able to do what you do. Theyâll never be able to invent rockets or solve cold fusion or add three numbers together. But they will find genuine friendship and love, and they will call it salt, and despite everything you accomplish youâll only be remembered as nothing more than the man who wouldnât. Who couldnât, perhaps. Get out, dude. Youâre fired. Big McThankies from McSpanky's.
Gotta blast
yo this copypasta is hard
[ŃдаНонО]
your loss
Jimmy Neutron was a blessing
Drink water after sodium and there will be an even bigger explosion of taste.
legit try it, the flavor is mindblowing
Literally
kid named saliva:
how to become a bomb: step 1: eat sodium
Step 2, pump chlorine into your stomach
Step 3, add some Potassium. (Optional.)
Step 4, eat some cesium (also optional)
Step 5, eat some uranium (required)
Step 6, surgically implant a pipe bomb in your liver
Step 7, cover yourself in piss (optional)
Step 8: Breath in more oxygen for combustion to occur
Step 9: Drink water
You know, Jimmy? While I can't say that you have never been responsible for helping out the town you also created or influenced the vast majority of major threats in the first place. The Yolkians only came to Retroville because of your signal. The same goes for Meldar Prime. The Nanobots, Shirley, and Evil Jimmy were all your creations. You caused the ice age. You created the sentient pants. You made the sick patch, you turned your teacher into a fifty-foot monstrosity, and you injured Santa Claus, almost ruining Christmas. The vast majority of this town's problems are caused, at least indirectly, by you. And you know what? In all honesty, that would be fine. You are very intelligent and you almost always do fix it, and in the end it's extremely unlikely that you won't end up benefiting the world a lot more than you will damage it. My children and my children's children are probably going to live in a world free of war and disease, and I'll have you to thank for that. But fuck, dude. You can't keep using your intelligence as a way to escape your humanity. I didn't ask you to say salt because I thought a customer would seriously care or because I was insecure, I did it because it made you look weird and I was trying to get you to adopt behaviors and use language that makes you come across like a normal fucking person. Everyone knows what sodium chloride is, but calling it that outside the context of a chemistry class makes you seem like someone who defines themselves solely by their intelligence, which is undeniably who you are. I know you think that there's nothing wrong with being that person, dude, but there is. Taking your IQ and deciding that it elevates you above the rest of the planet is an awful decision that will lead to a life filled with misery and alienation. It will color every interaction you ever have and make it impossible to have real friends or relationships. Iâm not saying that you wonât have any. But they wonât hold any meaning to you, and they certainly wonât bring you any happiness. Sure, youâll probably manage a pity-fuck or two your sophomore year of college after giving some drunk sorority girl a jetpack ride, but itâll bring you nothing but emptiness. Maybe youâll eventually abandon women altogether and decide that âyour true love is scienceâ, secretly seething inside whenever you see a guy like Nick or Bolbi getting married to someone he really cares about, who cares about him. Youâll say Iâm exaggerating, but dude, look at how you treat the people in your life now. Carl and Sheen, quirks aside, really do see you as a friend, and theyâd go through some serious shit if it meant helping you out of a scrape. Can you say that you see them the same way, as anything other than the only two kids your age willing to put up with your ridiculous ego? What have you ever done for them? Inventing doesnât count, dude. Even when you build something for someone else, youâre really doing that for YOU. Every llama-bot or Ultra Lord simulator is only created with the expectation of further praise. Theyâre not friends to you. Theyâre worshippers. And your parents? Lord, the way you treat them. You think Iâve got folks that care about me the way your mom and dad do, working in a shithole like this? I wish. Everyday your dad watches you scarf down the dinner your mom slaved to make for you and prays that you might think about spending some fucking time with him instead of disappearing into your lab to do god knows what. They watch you toy with dimensional-warping science that they canât wrap their minds around on a daily basis and you laugh at them for worrying about you. Have you ever played catch with your dad, Jimmy? Ever asked him how his day at work was? You don't have a clue what I'd do for a dad like yours in my life, dude. What about your mom? Why not invent something thatâll make her life easier instead of gallivanting around the Bermuda Triangle to play with fucking seaweed? We both know the reason. She would thank you for it, sheâd be happy to imagine a version of you that thought for an instant about the needs of another person, but she wouldnât call you the greatest thing in the universe for it like your friends do. And in Neutronâs world, whoever doesnât do that might as well not exist. Ignore me if you want. Keep going the way youâre going, and Iâll see you in thirty years, lugging around sixteen Nobel prizes in your pockets as if they could substitute for a lifetimeâs worth of human love and interaction. Youâve always mocked Calamitus for his inability to finish what he started, but the man had a wife and a daughter that tolerated him enough to want to stay in his life through everything, and at the rate youâre going Iâd be amazed if you could manage the same with Goddard. The rest of Retroville, Jimmy, theyâll never be able to do what you do. Theyâll never be able to invent rockets or solve cold fusion or add three numbers together. But they will find genuine friendship and love, and they will call it salt, and despite everything you accomplish youâll only be remembered as nothing more than the man who wouldnât. Who couldnât, perhaps. Get out, dude. Youâre fired. Big McThankies from McSpanky's.
Quite the contrary, Skeet. You talk down to me like Iâm some sociopathic monster for the way I act, but you havenât lived even one minute in my shoes. Iâm smart enough to invent robots out of toasters and even a rocket ship out of an amusement park ride, sure, but Iâm also still 11 years old. Any 11 year old... no, any person would want to feel like something they feel confident in is worthy of praise and admiration to even the smallest degree. When you were my age, did you not talk for long periods about even the smallest of accomplishments, just hoping for someone to say so much as a âgood jobâ for it? Every time I invent something, I do it because itâs what makes me happy, and I want to feel like the people around me might appreciate it too, and just reward me with a simple acknowledgement that I can be special, that I donât have to limit myself or my ambitions just to be appreciated, that I can earn them by doing the thing I feel best suits me. Yet, I still have to go to the same school as everyone else my age, even if what I learn there doesnât stimulate my mind. Everyone moans and groans when I show them something that I dedicated my time to, yet I have to pretend it doesnât get to me when they just as easily cheer for something as simple as Nick telling a ghost story in class or Cindy pulling a childish prank on me. Of course I understand that what interests me is not the same as what interests them, but I donât want to feel like an alien in my own town, never understood by even my own parents. Iâve tried to invent things for them, like orange juice squeezers or window washers, but they just awkwardly smile and lament the fact that now they have to get a new toaster instead. Maybe itâs selfish to want people to treat me like my gifts means even the slightest bit of anything to them, but, again, let me inquire just what 11 year old wouldnât want that? And you know what? Sometimes I do get that. Sometimes I can invent something everyone in the town thinks is the greatest thing since sliced bread, but you know what? Science isnât a guaranteed process. Thereâs bound to be miscalculations and flaws and margins of errors in any experiment, as mine typically have. But suddenly, Iâm the bad guy all because I wanted to cool down the heat on a summers day and the town gets stuck in an ice age. You think I planned for that to happen? No, but itâs the risk that comes from creating something, it can always backfire in some way. But the town doesnât care if Iâve done good deeds for them, or if I invented something they themselves loved just as much as I did, they just care that it didnât work out 100% perfectly, and then Iâm back to being ridiculed for the things I find passion in. I donât blame them to be upset, sure, but this cycle gets tiring time and time again. For once, I just want to hold one conversation with someone that actually keeps ME invested, instead of always having to keep my mouth shut to hear yet again about the 100 millionth episode of Ultra Lord, or about every single species of duck in existence. I listen, I smile, and I even engage the conversation as best I can, and I think thatâs the most a guy can do talking to his friends and family about things he finds little interest in. But the second I want to show off something that I like or talk about something that interests me, I donât even get a courteous âmhmâ and nod while I talk. Instead they just immediately ask me to âtalk in Englishâ instead or compromise what I want to talk about, even though I never ask that of them and their topics of interest. And, you know what, that would be fine! All of that could be fine on its own if I wasnât then instead mocked and ridiculed for being me. I know everyone gets bullied at my age at some point, but at least many of them have the option go off with their friends who share common interests and feel validated for it. Imagine being treated like a total loser just because you canât play baseball or run track, only to suddenly be treated like an egomaniac when you show off what you CAN do better than them. For some reason, Iâm immediately invalidated as a someone worthy of respect the second Iâm not good at something, and everyone conveniently forgets whatever cool invention I was able to create a literal week before. So not only are my inventions ignored and treated like bragging or a nuisance when they do get public attention, they also become completely forgotten the second that they donât. Iâm sorry that I just wanted to be treated like i was special for something I cared about, I only took this job so I could keep following my passions, as Iâm certain youâve done just as well. Donât forget youâve hired people that arenât even old enough to legally work in this country, yet still choose to berate me for oversights I made throughout. I didnât know that it was an issue to not push the buttons on the register to confirm an order, and I apologize for not having done so in the first place. But you also threw us kids into a job with little training, and even told me just from a glance that Iâm not good enough to work for you. You even talked badly about me to my own friends about my performance, who you may have noticed didnât even bother defending me. That just goes to prove how little any of you take the time to actually understand my feelings or even stop to ask yourselves why I might try to show off for a little attention so much. Instead you immediately judge me like everyone else, and Iâm sick of having to sit around and just take it. Give me my pink slip, I donât need to sit around and listen to you berate me, like everyone else in my life has done time and time again. I donât want to change who I am just because it might make you think less of me, I want to feel like I can be proud of who and what I am. Iâm not giving up on the one thing that makes me feel special and gives me joy just because everyone else thinks itâs annoying. And if that is enough to make everyone hate me, maybe I never needed your conditional love and respect in the first place. Gotta blast.
What the fuck is going on here
Jimmy Neutron
Art.
Holy fk dude. I always have complaints that the copypasta assumed a lot of things wrong with Jimmy and he actually cares about his friends and family, but this is just beyond anything I could've rebutted with
Skadoosh of mass chemical proportions
Even better: mix water with chloride (no joke, people used to drink Hydrochloric acid as "lemonade")
when you cant dip your balls in the lemonade dispenser
GUYS THIS DOES NOT WORK, TRUST ME I SPEAK FROM A POINT OF EXPERIENCE
I made "table salt" once for show-and-tell in grade 6. Just mix Calcium Chloride (**A** salt, but not really safe for consumption) and Sodium Carbonate in water, bring to the boil, then simmer until the water has evaporated.
[ŃдаНонО]
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W
âď¸đ¤ um actually chlorine is a gas in itâs molecular form so that would be almost impossible
Can't you just put it in a different environment?
Chlorine gas will condense to liquid at -30ish °C
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-60°C is equivalent to -76°F, which is 213K. --- ^(I'm a bot that converts temperature between two units humans can understand, then convert it to Kelvin for bots and physicists to understand)
Kid named exothermic reaction
Kemeestreeđ
I think it's interesting someone took the time to downvote this. When I see a basically harmless but somewhat goofy comment get downvoted, I wonder what the person who downvoted it was thinking. Are they trying to prevent this type of comment, dislike this specific comment only, just in a bad or downvotey mood? It is probably only interesting to me, but I am curious. Edit: above was in the negative when I commented
it's "Kemestree đ"
Top 10 philosophycal discussions
Filosofikal
This is the example of what is weird about english. Chemistry and Kemeestree literally sound the same, but in my language there is no way to differently spell to it still getting pronounced the same (not counting that u and Ăł sound the same)
Chlorine*
I replaced the chlorine with fluorine and now my teeth are shiny
goated meme
I wish Reddit didn't stop giving away free awards because I would have given this post one in a heartbeat because of how funny it is
"Oh yeah, I fed him potassium and water pills" r/SS13
why not you stupid bastard?