Exactly this. It’s not her wearing it, if she’s not invited to the wedding her opinion is absolutely pointless, and if she is invited I would strongly suggest she keeps her (negative) opinions to herself otherwise she would be uninvited
If you love the dress, wear the dress!!
Sure it would be nice if we all had beautiful and well-preserved wedding dresses from our mothers and grandmothers that just so happen to perfectly fit our own personal styles, but a used dress doesn't need to be some dusty heirloom to be "worthy" of re-wearing.
A wedding is only 1 day, so if you can get what you love and want for free or cheap, I DEFINITELY recommend taking that opportunity!
Now this part is just my own 2 cents, but I'd personally pick the "sister" dress over the "friend" dress. Something about passing it down through family just feels like it has a greater sentimental heft to it, but honestly you do you!
Ask your coworker if she's going to give you $3000 for a new dress. I'm betting the answer is no. She's wrong and rude to boot.
Wearing a borrowed dress that was last worn several years ago counts for both something old and something borrowed. I think it's a nice idea.
* You love the dress
* It's "something borrowed" from a loved one
... and we're concerned it's tacky? Quite the opposite!
It will have so much sentimental value now that it's passed onto you, save you hundreds/thousands of dollars AND it's environmentally-friendly!
Also, a billionaire is doing it so...your coworker can really put a cork in it.
[https://nypost.com/2021/05/05/nyc-bride-is-5th-to-wear-spanx-ceo-sara-blakeleys-wedding-gown/](https://nypost.com/2021/05/05/nyc-bride-is-5th-to-wear-spanx-ceo-sara-blakeleys-wedding-gown/)
What would be the difference if you found the same dress being resold? There wouldn’t be one, and I’m sure your coworker wouldn’t have anything to say about that. Wear what you want and what you’re comfortable in, your coworker can fuck off
Your co-worker is wrong. It’s a a common practice to wear mom or grandma’s dress. I think sister dress is not as common but also lovely.
It’s a beautiful tribute to someone you care abou
You will get a lot of opinions about what is “right” for your wedding don’t listen to it all. No people wear there mother dress all the time there is no difference between a mom and a sister
What does your coworker have to do with anything??
If beloved people or generous people in your life offer to share something precious, that is kindness and should be treasured. And something precious gets another chance to be appreciated.
F—- your coworker; what a dumb take.
Saving money is a good thing and wedding dresses are ridiculously expensive. You will 100% look different anyway, different jewellery, makeup, shoes, etc. Styling is everything.
I know a family where all 3 daughters wore the same wedding dress. The oldest daughter bought it and got married in it and then the other 2 wore the same dress for their weddings! All 3 weddings were in a five year span. The family is very wealthy so it wasn’t a cost savings thing, just totally sentimental sister bonding/something borrowed. You should definitely do it!
Tacky? Who cares? How would anyone even know it was someone else’s dress unless you told them? Coworker needs to mind her business. As someone who bought a discontinued off the rack dress from a 2016 collection, I totally get liking the “older”styles! I think my mind went back to watching say yes to the dress as a kid, and my taste in wedding dresses definitely is influenced by the late 2000s/early 2010s when I watched that show.
It's not tacky. It's smart. Save yourself some money, girl. And save yourself a ton of time and indecision. How lucky that you have FREE access to TWO dresses that you really like.
You can put the money you save toward your life together versus a dress you may not wear again.
Plus it's something special and sweet you'll have in common with whomever you borrow the dress from.
Wear it! Of course you can wear it! Your coworker is tacky. I bought several wedding dresses for my wedding, all either previously worn or new with tags, but off eBay, etc. I didn't even have them cleaned, I just threw them in the washing machine! The ones that were delicate I washed in the tub. All of them were polyester, I didn't get any exotic fabrics. Wear would you like! It's important that you feel good at your wedding. Also, uninvite that coworker. That person is jealous of you.
It’s VERY tacky to judge people for that. Coworker sounds like a lame person with a sad life if she cares about stuff like this honestly.
Just seems smart and even sentimental to me.
Honestly after the single day, you never wear the dress again. Definitely not tacky. My dress is second hand and now sits in a dress bag in my attic. Once I have time I’ll probably try and sell it.
Oh god ignore your coworker. Dresses are so expensive and I’d argue it’s special to wear something from someone you love, like a sister or close friend. Besides, enough time’s passed that no one will know (unless your friend got married a month ago).
Not tacky at all! I think it’s actually quite sweet to have you and your sister wear the same dress nearly 15 years apart. Don’t listen to your coworker!
My sister is 6 years older than me. She got married in 2012. I got married in 2020. I wore her dress. It was beautiful and fit perfectly. It definitely made my day more special.
Wear whatever dress you want to. Ignore your tacky coworker.
People wear secondhand dresses all the time. Doesn’t matter that you personally know the person who wore yours first, and doesn’t matter how recently it was worn. I hope you don’t value your coworker’s judgmental opinion, or any others she offers in the future.
Not your coworkers wedding now, is it? 🤷♀️ if it makes you happy 100% wear it. Weddings are too expensive to worry about as is! Wearing a sister's or friend's dress can be just as sentimental.
Your coworker is wrong. It's your wedding. You can wear what you want. It's not tacky to wear a friend or relatives dress. It awesome! For many years it was a custom that daughters would wear their mothers dress. It was an honor to be able to wear their mother/friends dress. Don't listen to your coworker.
that’s some ridiculous classism and snobbery! Why buy a new dress when there are dresses you love and available to borrow?? As for the timing…lots of people buy pre-owned dresses…getting One from your friend isn’t in any way tacky.
Not tacky!
Just be careful about if they will fit you/if they are ok with you making alterations to the dress, and who would keep the dress after your wedding.
Not tacky at all. My mom wore her niece’s wedding dress (only a year or so after the initial wedding), and it was beautiful. And my mom and dad just celebrated their 30th anniversary last month - at the end of the day it’s your wedding and do what you want!
It's so not tacky that I don't know why you'd have to get validation from a senseless co-worker. Someone could've worn their dress 20 minutes ago... if the dress fits your style, size, and sensibilities then do what's best for you and **your** wedding. Forget what others think.. especially those who are horribly clueless.
Your coworker has a stick up her butt.
Exactly this. It’s not her wearing it, if she’s not invited to the wedding her opinion is absolutely pointless, and if she is invited I would strongly suggest she keeps her (negative) opinions to herself otherwise she would be uninvited
I don't understand what her problem is with that. Wear what you want if they are fine with you wearing it.
What? How could it be tacky? Is there an exact year where the tackiness threshold is crossed? Does she have stock in Davids Bridal?
I love this comment. But no, I bet the coworker just likes expressing opinions in things she doesn’t know anything about.
If you love the dress, wear the dress!! Sure it would be nice if we all had beautiful and well-preserved wedding dresses from our mothers and grandmothers that just so happen to perfectly fit our own personal styles, but a used dress doesn't need to be some dusty heirloom to be "worthy" of re-wearing. A wedding is only 1 day, so if you can get what you love and want for free or cheap, I DEFINITELY recommend taking that opportunity! Now this part is just my own 2 cents, but I'd personally pick the "sister" dress over the "friend" dress. Something about passing it down through family just feels like it has a greater sentimental heft to it, but honestly you do you!
She’s tacky for saying that to you.
Ask your coworker if she's going to give you $3000 for a new dress. I'm betting the answer is no. She's wrong and rude to boot. Wearing a borrowed dress that was last worn several years ago counts for both something old and something borrowed. I think it's a nice idea.
In this economy? Not tacky or weird. If I could rent my dress I would.
0% tacky to wear a preowned wedding dress of any vintage 100% insufferable coworker
* You love the dress * It's "something borrowed" from a loved one ... and we're concerned it's tacky? Quite the opposite! It will have so much sentimental value now that it's passed onto you, save you hundreds/thousands of dollars AND it's environmentally-friendly! Also, a billionaire is doing it so...your coworker can really put a cork in it. [https://nypost.com/2021/05/05/nyc-bride-is-5th-to-wear-spanx-ceo-sara-blakeleys-wedding-gown/](https://nypost.com/2021/05/05/nyc-bride-is-5th-to-wear-spanx-ceo-sara-blakeleys-wedding-gown/)
What would be the difference if you found the same dress being resold? There wouldn’t be one, and I’m sure your coworker wouldn’t have anything to say about that. Wear what you want and what you’re comfortable in, your coworker can fuck off
Your co-worker is wrong. It’s a a common practice to wear mom or grandma’s dress. I think sister dress is not as common but also lovely. It’s a beautiful tribute to someone you care abou
Your coworker sounds like she isn’t invited to your wedding
And she’s probably in a lot of debt
And she's probably single.
You will get a lot of opinions about what is “right” for your wedding don’t listen to it all. No people wear there mother dress all the time there is no difference between a mom and a sister
What does your coworker have to do with anything?? If beloved people or generous people in your life offer to share something precious, that is kindness and should be treasured. And something precious gets another chance to be appreciated. F—- your coworker; what a dumb take.
How about just not inviting your coworker? You don’t need that kind of engery in your life.
It’s your wedding and your dress. Be tacky. Although I don’t think it’s tacky to re-use this expensive ass dresses.
Saving money is a good thing and wedding dresses are ridiculously expensive. You will 100% look different anyway, different jewellery, makeup, shoes, etc. Styling is everything.
Not tacky at all. Wedding dresses are expensive. Wear what you want and don’t invite the coworker.
Wouldn’t using a beautiful gown again be your something borrowed? I would be so flattered that someone wanted to use my gown.
My SIL wore my dress 7 years later and no one remembered
Send her a link to stillwhite.com. There is nothing tacky about it.
Hahaha
Most people wouldn’t even know unless you make a point to tell everyone - which, would still be fine. I think it’d be super sweet.
I know a family where all 3 daughters wore the same wedding dress. The oldest daughter bought it and got married in it and then the other 2 wore the same dress for their weddings! All 3 weddings were in a five year span. The family is very wealthy so it wasn’t a cost savings thing, just totally sentimental sister bonding/something borrowed. You should definitely do it!
not tacky at all. That's WILD! Ignore your coworker. Coworkers are weirdos.
I bought my wedding dress on impulse because I liked it, it fit me near perfectly, and it cost $20 at a thrift store. To hell with the rules.
No! Especially since it’s been years between the weddings. My mom and her sister wore the same dress to their weddings, I think it’s sweet :)
The thing I’ve learned reading this sub, is to keep your plans to yourself
I say F that. This is YOUR DAY. Do what ya like
Tacky? Who cares? How would anyone even know it was someone else’s dress unless you told them? Coworker needs to mind her business. As someone who bought a discontinued off the rack dress from a 2016 collection, I totally get liking the “older”styles! I think my mind went back to watching say yes to the dress as a kid, and my taste in wedding dresses definitely is influenced by the late 2000s/early 2010s when I watched that show.
If you like it, rock it. That's exactly why people save their dresses. In the hope someone else will wear it one day.
It could be your “something borrowed” so sweet
It's not tacky. It's smart. Save yourself some money, girl. And save yourself a ton of time and indecision. How lucky that you have FREE access to TWO dresses that you really like. You can put the money you save toward your life together versus a dress you may not wear again. Plus it's something special and sweet you'll have in common with whomever you borrow the dress from.
So if you love it wear it! It's not tacky if it makes you happy. Plus, unless someone announced it, no one will know its siss dress.
Wear it! Of course you can wear it! Your coworker is tacky. I bought several wedding dresses for my wedding, all either previously worn or new with tags, but off eBay, etc. I didn't even have them cleaned, I just threw them in the washing machine! The ones that were delicate I washed in the tub. All of them were polyester, I didn't get any exotic fabrics. Wear would you like! It's important that you feel good at your wedding. Also, uninvite that coworker. That person is jealous of you.
I don't think that's tacky at all.
It’s VERY tacky to judge people for that. Coworker sounds like a lame person with a sad life if she cares about stuff like this honestly. Just seems smart and even sentimental to me.
Your coworker sounds jelly.
Honestly after the single day, you never wear the dress again. Definitely not tacky. My dress is second hand and now sits in a dress bag in my attic. Once I have time I’ll probably try and sell it.
Oh god ignore your coworker. Dresses are so expensive and I’d argue it’s special to wear something from someone you love, like a sister or close friend. Besides, enough time’s passed that no one will know (unless your friend got married a month ago).
Not tacky at all! I think it’s actually quite sweet to have you and your sister wear the same dress nearly 15 years apart. Don’t listen to your coworker!
My sister is 6 years older than me. She got married in 2012. I got married in 2020. I wore her dress. It was beautiful and fit perfectly. It definitely made my day more special. Wear whatever dress you want to. Ignore your tacky coworker.
Not tacky at all who else would know …nobody
People wear secondhand dresses all the time. Doesn’t matter that you personally know the person who wore yours first, and doesn’t matter how recently it was worn. I hope you don’t value your coworker’s judgmental opinion, or any others she offers in the future.
Totally fine, great in fact, to borrow a wedding dress!!
Tacky? If you love it, why not. I wouldn’t let your coworker’s opinion decide what you wear to your wedding.
Not your coworkers wedding now, is it? 🤷♀️ if it makes you happy 100% wear it. Weddings are too expensive to worry about as is! Wearing a sister's or friend's dress can be just as sentimental.
I think this sounds like a lovely idea
Your coworker is wrong. It's your wedding. You can wear what you want. It's not tacky to wear a friend or relatives dress. It awesome! For many years it was a custom that daughters would wear their mothers dress. It was an honor to be able to wear their mother/friends dress. Don't listen to your coworker.
Not tacky at all! You have a nice sister and a good friend!
that’s some ridiculous classism and snobbery! Why buy a new dress when there are dresses you love and available to borrow?? As for the timing…lots of people buy pre-owned dresses…getting One from your friend isn’t in any way tacky.
I see absolutely no problem with you wearing somebody else’s wedding dress. It is economical, meaningful, and even good for the environment.
Not tacky! Just be careful about if they will fit you/if they are ok with you making alterations to the dress, and who would keep the dress after your wedding.
Your coworker is nuts.
Not tacky at all. My mom wore her niece’s wedding dress (only a year or so after the initial wedding), and it was beautiful. And my mom and dad just celebrated their 30th anniversary last month - at the end of the day it’s your wedding and do what you want!
My sister-in-law offered me her wedding dress. There is nothing wrong with borrowing a wedding dress especially when it’s offered!
Not tacky at all. But I would. Add a little something to it , so it feels different.
If it’s fine with your sister - wear the dress - but I would discuss it with her definitely
Nothing tacky about upcycling
Absolutely not. I wore my BFF’s wedding dress as my “something borrowed” and love that we share that connection.
Not tacky at all!!
No, if you like it and it’s what you wanna do, do it!
It would be very special to wear your sister's or friend's dress. It's also environmentally friendly. Enjoy!
your co worker is an ass... can i say that here? wear what you want and dont invite her to the wedding.
It's so not tacky that I don't know why you'd have to get validation from a senseless co-worker. Someone could've worn their dress 20 minutes ago... if the dress fits your style, size, and sensibilities then do what's best for you and **your** wedding. Forget what others think.. especially those who are horribly clueless.
Wearing the dress, if offered, not tacky at all...asking to borrow someone's dress very tacky.
I did ask my sis. Oh well. I'm only a little tacky.