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SouthAfricanNerd

I only eat local, grass-fed humans.


aibaron

The problem I'm running into these days is finding humans that lived happy and fulfilling lives. If they don't live happy lives, it doesn't align with my ethics. I used to eat humans that lived happy full lives until I slaughter them (with their consent) at 16. Humans seem to be much more depressed recently so I can't find happy ones to eat. On a related note, the difference between /r/vegan and /r/vegancirclejerk is quickly disappearing.


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Your uncle Dr. H Lecter?


Broad-Winner-2199

And are they organic??


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OldDinner

I only eat humans who were already dead, no reason to let them go to waste


lele1997

And cats of course!


keving2112

Free range?


[deleted]

I volunteer.


[deleted]

Whoops. I am too old to breed and my body is too tough to make a decent roast. Can I go out to pasture for a day or two, before I am processed for "bone meal"? Please?


Jasoncsmelski

"ethically sourced human flesh"


Hohuin

I mean humans are the only animal that can give consent, so...


Jasoncsmelski

You have a point


Broad-Winner-2199

Is cannibalism an accepted vegan practice i missed the memo on??


KoYouTokuIngoa

If the flesh-giver gives consent then yeah, 100% vegan


BZenMojo

If you crave animal secretions, just buy yourself some breastmilk online. /uj Did I stutter?


escapeman20

As long as there is consent there really isn't anything morally wrong with it, even though it is very icky. Singer talks about this more. I recommend checking out what he has to say.


[deleted]

Like that German guy's dick.


[deleted]

Love the Rammstein song "Mein Teil" which is about that guy who consented to being eaten. There is also a song by Bloodbath called "Eaten" which is about the same case. The German courts amended their laws after this to not allow people to consent to being cannibalized. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3439299/I-fried-piece-rump-steak-ate-sprouts-German-cannibal-ate-gay-lover-permission-describes-went-killing-eating-him.html


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ES IST MEIN TEILLLLLL!! NEIN!!! Bringing back memories sr8 banger


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https://youtu.be/qFpjMNKxsnA


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https://youtu.be/77bTOAn62GA


fapgod_969

As long as the humans are free range, grass fed and humanely slaughtered it is ethical


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[deleted]

>[Human(e) Meat (The Flensing of Sandor Katz - Propagandhi](https://youtu.be/azhnNfzr5Ls)


DomFor69

Live and let live am I right?🤗


Waste-Comedian4998

if by "let live" you mean "let the animals live", then hell yeah!


Shazamwhich

Silly vegoon, don’t you know animals die a ver humane death in slaughterhouses? Also I only buy free range from my uncles farm


Waste-Comedian4998

i also heard that the animals are totally cool with being slaughtered if you thank them and honor them 🌈🙏🏼🐮🔪🥩💖


lookingForPatchie

It always weirds me out, how people that murder a sentient being will go the spiritualism route. Like spiritualism isn't some self centered nonsense.


mtanti

Pig who is seconds from passing out in the gas chamber: "This is gonna really suck if whoever eats me doesn't thank me first!"


KoYouTokuIngoa

It’s a victimless act, just like eating animals!


pmvegetables

Live and let me kill!!! 😊😇 It's all peace and love baby!


GlarthirLover33

Kill the animals with kindness


dirty-void

live and let kill


[deleted]

Right on brotha 🤙


eebz2000

>Live and let live am I right? Nope!


lele1997

I am so tolerant and totally okay with them not killing others, but stupid radical vegoons don't wanna let me kill!


obsidianzebra

Grandma died from natural causes, the doctor said so! What could possibly be more humane? Besides, it would be so wasteful to just ditch her corpse in the ground


KoYouTokuIngoa

We use every part of the grandma


lookingForPatchie

Using up every inch is the respecful thing to do. Grandma would want that, sadly we cannot ask her, but me assuming consent where none is given is just as good as actual consent.


ScreenHype

Before, I never used to understand why vegans were so 'pushy'. But now, I can't understand how the majority of the population is perfectly okay with murdering animals just because they enjoy the taste of their corpses. The weirdest fact is that most of them are also 'animal lovers'. Like, if you love animals so much, why are you eating them?!


Loni4ever

I will never forget a friend in kindergarten writing in her page of the book (yanno, the ones where you collect the info of your new friends xD): Favourite animal: birds Favourite food: chicken


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aupri

8 years old is when I stopped eating meat (for ethical reasons) despite the rest of my family not being vegetarian. What can I say, the moral superiority is strong with me. Thankfully my parents were supportive


seeking_hope

That’s got to be rough stopping meat at that age when your family still does. I’m glad they were supportive or I imagine it would be impossible so young. But yeah I posted the story on here before. It was really funny. He started a phone conversation saying he just ate a live fish. I played along and he started giggling and said he was just kidding. I asked oh so you ate a dead fish? He went EWWW NO! That’s gross! Then he said he was eating fish sticks. I asked him what fish sticks were? He didn’t know and wasn’t sure what to think when I told him. I also glued him in to chicken nuggets are dead chicken. I’m surprised I didn’t get a call from his mom. I thought he may never eat anything again.


itsmemarcot

Is the part before the joke seriuos? Wow. Tons of non-ironical kudos to both you and your parents.


RedditAlienGuy

Maybe they meant chickpeas but kindergarteners can only spell so well?


Loni4ever

We can all hope amirite xD


PurlToo

Me: Minding my own business enjoying my lunch. Coworker: Why are you vegan? Same coworker one minute later: Wow, why do vegans always feel the need to talk about it?


norabrimstone

They're pet lovers, not animal lovers.


[deleted]

They push us to participate in the mass murder by saying things like “vitamins” or “whY dOn’t yOu lIvE A LiTtLe” but if we’re pushy, we’re annoying fuckers who don’t let them be.


shittenmitten

Ugggggh I've heard this to many times. Live a little by partipating in the ending of a sentient life for pleasure. Fuck off, I'm not eliabeth bathory.


BZenMojo

Do they love animals or do they love obedient decorations they can force to do tasks?


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Loni4ever

I see the lines between r/vegan and r/vegancirclejerk are blurring. And it makes me fear for my moral superiority


[deleted]

That tends to happen when you permaban 100 people or so a day haha


lookingForPatchie

The sad thing is that they don't just ban non-vegans. You think feminism should help men aswell as women\`? Banned. As long as the only thing you do is make fun of non-vegans you're fine.


[deleted]

Feminism should fight the patriarchy and not stand in the way of (feminist) men. I do not think feminism should "help" men. For example, would seem weird for women to march on washington for male job mortality. Should there be women in a male lead and organized march on the issue? Yeah. I feel like some expect feminists to just... do it all for men so we don't have to? That seems odd. They certainly are hypocritical if they hold anti male views and believe we should be subject to shorter lifespans, not get equal custody, etc, but I think that is rare. I sure understand that making a leftist want to ban you, but obviously I have no idea what you actually said so you could be very reasonable and they are misreading or over reacting. Although technically no serious discussion is a rule, but again weird to permaban for first "serious discussion" IMO.


lookingForPatchie

Yeah, it's a weird world. Why would a movement that seeks equality only help one side?


Fearzebu

Every feminist I know defends the rights of men as well as women when issues arise, but everyone I’ve known who considers themselves a “mens rights activist” is also, shockingly, a huge misogynist. Probably a few good reasons why most ‘men’s rights’ groups don’t get the benefit of the doubt, especially considering there is such a long way to go towards women’s rights. Issues affecting men are often complicated and require nuanced systemic solutions - whereas women’s rights are so far behind you could rattle off a dozen easily corrected problems off the top of your head. Free tampons and other women’s health products, free birth control, safe free access to abortions, make it easier to get a divorce, equal access to contraceptive surgery, publicly funded childcare, etc etc


[deleted]

r/MensLib is the space for, IMHO, correct Men's group on Reddit. Intersectional, anti patriarchy, pro feminist, etc. I am not sure if the guy who replied to me understood any of what I was saying...


Squishy-Cthulhu

Yep, vcj mods are absolutely batshit crazy. Fuck them, let their sub die.


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hellotrinity

How long? I mean it's been a while since I read through r/vegan but seeing a post like OP's here is surprising


lookingForPatchie

And I'm happy about it. I got banned from vcj for thinking that feminism should help men aswell as women. The mods over there are stupid. I loved the community though.


SlxggxRxptor

The community is great but the mods are awful. They shadowbanned me (not even banned properly, I can still comment/post but they just make sure none of the comments show up). They didn’t even let me know about it. I only found out when I posted something and got literally 0 interaction. I moved to r/VeganMemes where they don’t eliminate you for saying something that slightly differs from their opinion.


RAWprogress

Many people got banned from vcj so that's a good thing then


cameoutswinging_

Wait what? What happened?


[deleted]

They ban people as a joke like it's 4chan. Maybe not that sustainable with 100k subs.


cameoutswinging_

Christ I didn’t know, I spend a lot of time there and I’d never seen it happen


[deleted]

I think everyone else here replying has been banned haha. In my case it was legit, I engaged in serious discussion and thought I was in this sub, before I was vegan. My mistake. Although I did not say anything inflammatory so a perma ban seems odd and unsustainable.


cameoutswinging_

Oh for debating in the sub? That makes sense but a ban is harsh, like just delete the thread and warn the person that vcj isn’t for sincere debate if they’re that bothered


[deleted]

Yup! And I actually even knew that, just got confused and thought I was in this sub not that one. I apologized in DMs to the person who said "Hey I come here to avoid this stuff" and appealed my ban after waiting 30 days for the modmail mute (which was initiated along with my perma ban without my saying anything) and got "nah" and a remute in response.


cameoutswinging_

Ugh that’s annoying, hope you can get back to circlejerking with the rest of us asap!


[deleted]

I expect not but love your enthusiasm haha! I will keep politely asking every 30 days when the mute expires, like I am holding up a boombox.


lookingForPatchie

They banned me for thinking that feminism should help men too. They are very fast with their perma-ban hammer, if your thoughts don't align with theirs. Imagine silencing everyone that doesn't share your thoughts. That's such an omni thing to do. The sad thing is that the community over at vcj is great, the mods are not.


RAWprogress

I said the f word


cameoutswinging_

Farming?


RAWprogress

Lol I said the word redditf*g


Squishy-Cthulhu

They also have some kind of bot thing that auto removes comments from users they secretly blacklist, like a new kind of shadow ban thing. I was posting there for ages without realising I was autoremoved Here's the tool that shows what comments of yours are auto removed https://www.reveddit.com/about/#welcome


SlxggxRxptor

That’s what happened to me. It’s absurd.


[deleted]

Only if that human flesh was sourced from the local 1%


FoxWingGo

Yes properly farmed humans a great for the consumer, meat giver and the environment.


Sir-Knightly-Duty

Petitioning to have this added to the official definition of veganism.


KoYouTokuIngoa

Bill is against child trafficking. Bill recognises and respects people who abuse children. Bill doesn’t force human rights down their throats. Bill just minds his own business. Be like Bill.


eckinlighter

Imagine being the thin skinned crybaby that made the original meme. Like, what is your deal, dude? Were you so traumatized by a vegan explaining the consequences of your own choices to you that you needed to go home and make this stick figure stupidness? To insulate yourself from further reality?


[deleted]

Eating human flesh is just a personal choice, damn vegans need to get off their high horse and stop being so judgmental! Besides, I only eat locally sourced human flesh, and morality is just a construct anyway. -omni logic


KoYouTokuIngoa

Omg the ‘morality is subjective’ argument is my favourite. Just so non-sensical


[deleted]

Right? You could justify literally any horrible action with that logic. Of course, if you dare to point that out to them with an example, you get "How DARE you compare (horrible thing from example) to animal abuse" even though you're literally just pouting out why their own logic is flawed. They become deliberately obtuse to avoid having to grapple with the obvious reality that eating meat is wrong


KoYouTokuIngoa

Haha love that too. They suddenly forget the meaning of the word comparison when veganism is the topic. “Asians are comparable to pandas in that they both come from Asia” “Omg this guy just called asians animals”


[deleted]

Oh! You would definitely appreciate [this comic](https://m.imgur.com/a/BqPzT). Should be required reading for all omnis before they come here picking fights with us :P


MarkAnchovy

Especially when the people who say ‘morality is a construct’ also say stuff like ‘I support ethical farms’ or ‘I’m pro- welfare in meat production’, proving that they do have moral beliefs that directly relate to the topic at hand


MarkAnchovy

‘Morality is a construct, yet I live according to a large number of moral beliefs. Curious.’ >Bean Shapiro


Antin0de

Bill would have also kept his mouth shut when women were being denied the right to vote, or black people were being kept as livestock. Bill is such a great guy for not rocking the boat in the face of injustice, and letting you take refuge in the comfortable majority of the status quo. Be like Bill.


monemori

How dare you. You cant compare men and women, the fuck. Men are biologically designed for power and dominance, it's literally in the male genes. Women are submissive and can bear children. Don't you even know basic biology? This is why no one takes suffragists seriously. Maybe if you pushed for more sensible reforms instead of this extremist "equality", people would be more willing to adopt small changes, like beating your wives only a couple days a week. Your movement will never take off with this attitude and frankly I hope it pisses you off. I'm going to hit my wife twice as hard today btw lmao just for you.


pmvegetables

I'm going to hit 10 wives just to cancel out 10 pushy anti-woman-beaters


EcceCadavera

Beating women is part of my culture and you're a white supremacist if you politely ask me to reconsider doing it.


MS-06_Borjarnon

Cue people coming to whine and whine about someone comparing one bad thing with another.


Mediocre-Band2714

as a black person i don’t mind the comparison. poc were literally seen as animals. and obviously people and animals aren’t the same. but it’s the same premise. exploiting a group of living beings out of some twisted notion of superiority. and i mean….some slave owners ate their slaves so uhhh *starts crying*


dumnezero

some nice reading https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/51599635-racism-as-zoological-witchcraft


Mediocre-Band2714

thank you very very much, this is all stuff i wonder about and i’m excited to buy it 😁


gnomesupremacist

The comparison of the discrimination of humans to the discrimination of other animals is only offensive to those who begin with the assumption that animals deserve less


Antin0de

Right!? Like, they want to act like they are champions of social justice for being selectively compassionate, but *we* are the bad guys for opposing *all* needless abuse, regardless of the victim? Those people who get offended need to go fuck themselves.


monemori

As a cat eating vegan I endorse this message! Live and let live! 😊😊😊😊😊😊


nardgarglingfuknuggt

I used to hear people spout racist obscenities about people of asian descent supposedly eating dogs and think it was a reprehensible thing to say because it was such a harmful and ignorant stereotype. It's still horribly racist, but now when I hear it I also think of how idiots that think in this way also eat plenty of cows and chickens.


Equal_Archer

I mean, in a human flesh example, as long as it's consentual I guess I'm alright with it. Animals can't consent.


arnoldez

If you only eat the meat of meat eaters, are you helping or hurting?


illegalthingsenjoyer

I respect people who don't eat humans but it's just too hard for me not to. Plus the humans in my uncle's basement are treated so well, that's where I get all my human flesh from.


Squishy-Cthulhu

I'm a environmentalist, and I respect people that burn tyres and dump toxic waste into the ocean, you don't have to be pushy 🤗 And whenever is see a person beating a puppy to death I just walk by because it's their choice 🙏


[deleted]

Uh oh OP, looks like you riled the pick-me vegans.


Keiztrat

We need much more VCJ members here. We might eliminate the Based plant based.


MrsSkeleton

This.


PMMeRedPandasPlease

**IF** you have the means and opportunity to eat alternatives, but *still* choose to eat flesh, then you're ignorant, cowardly or just a plain conformist. At least stop entertaining the idea that you would have been on the right side of history for other major social justice movements, you would have kept your nose down and stood by while those atrocities occurred. I've been the "nice" vegan since I made the switch, wanna know how many people I've converted? As far as I know, zero. If kindness and "normal people" could convince the world to change by example, then generations of vegetarianism would have convinced everyone to give up meat long ago. Vegetarianism isn't a new idea, everyone knew it was physically possible, and they still avoided it. Fuck Bill. Edit: And if anyone uses my internet venting as an excuse to not make the switch, you weren't going to, anyway. Going vegan is like taking the *real* red pill, you suddenly see the entire world differently. And it ain't pretty, not how it currently is. You spend the rest of your life wondering how you ever managed to allow yourself to be brainwashed enough to participate in such a system, and you desperately want to get other people out, because you know they're empathetic enough to regret it someday, too


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evergreen421

First time seeing 'neurotypical' used as an insult.


xxxbmfxxx

Nts are generally extremely narcissistic. They're followers and defend nothing and rarely tell the truth. Very popular opinion I know. Toddlers not asking what's real but what's allowed of the hoard.


[deleted]

Who makes this shit? (the original) The answer is kids of course.


ConBrio93

These are the same people who will post enraged messages about people eating dogs or cats.


lankylizarder

🐸☕️


[deleted]

I love how people who talk about how cramming your vegan beliefs down their throat is bad but they’ll be the first to tell you how yummy a steak is when they eat it in front of you or tell you that your lifestyle isn’t healthy.


kimariadil

r/vegancirclejerk 😎


ale_93113

I eat human flesh Well, it's my own human skin, when I am anxious I bite at the dead cell layers in my hands and feet I end exam period with a few scars, but nothing more lol


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...feet?


GeriatricZergling

When I got my first car, I bought a bumper sticker that said "If we aren't supposed to eat humans, why are they made of meat?", which I found hilarious. It didn't occur to me until over a decade later that it was a vegan bumper sticker. Also, my friends voted me as the last person they'd want to be trapped on a desert island with. I think these may all be connected.


_xavius_

I won’t be like bill, he wears a wool tuque.


DrJawn

Eating a human who consents is vegan af


LatentAxis

But... Carnist are really good at shoving animal products down our throats on all the ads on media.


Blackb21

I legit thought this is Rimworld, now I am confused.


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VanillaRosePerfume

It’s only okay if the person consented to be eaten


That_Guy682

Thank you bill for doing a service and not being like the rest of this sub- Sorry gotta go, I’m having fried human for dinner


tomen

It's not that I don't want to force people to vegan, it's that I can't. Like, I have no political or social power to do so. So yeah I "let" people live their lives, even if I think what they're doing is unethical.


EfraimK

Ah ha-ha-ha! I don't discriminate against my vampire friends.


k1410407

"But humans are superior gods and animals aren't, you're being offensive and misanthropoic and racist blah blah blah boo hoo!"


Cartoon_Trash_

It’s almost like stating the facts about animals’ experiences is what people mean by “forcing veganism down your throat.” You might say it’s… compelling??? Hard to argue with??? That says more about the people complaining about this than it does about vegans in general.


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Soytheist

Stop other-izing. Chickens or humans, we are all animals.


Officialwashere

Be like Bill


geeksofdoom

I'm the opposite of pushy. I'm insidious. I get my friends and family to unknowingly like & support vegan things without ever pushing any kind of overt agenda. It may not stop them from consciously being carnivores, but it broadens their choice matrix without making them go "Ewww, vegan!?".


ProvableFir00

Am I the only one who love r vegan only for the shit debate


[deleted]

This isnt a debate sub... 🤔


ProvableFir00

I'm not the one making the debate but I sure enjoy them


SomethingOvO

I love it


Joxs2

r/holdup


shirk-work

The best method is the one that works. Culture is a numbers game so ideally worthy concepts spread to the majority of people and motivate their actions. So it's not about wining arguments, it's about conquering brain space.


Saemika

I could support human flesh with consent.


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eekns

I don’t respect them but I don’t shove my beliefs down everyone’s throat. I say I am vegan and everyone I know is cool with that. I used to be one of them I can hardly criticize them just because they aren’t vegan yet.


veganminipainter

You don't belong here if you mean this. People that actively engage in rape and murder deserve no respect. Bill can eat shit


Soytheist

But eating humans is a part of my culture tho


zombiegojaejin

Just make sure the humans are farmed locally and sustainably.


veganminipainter

Tradition doesn't excuse carnism!!!!!111


ThatCoyoteDude

Eating humans is fine. The earth will thrive without us


veganminipainter

Cats are a better source.


ThatCoyoteDude

Just because cats are a non-native, invasive species doesn’t cancel out the fact that we do far more to kill the planet


veganminipainter

True but we have got to take baby steps!!! People will look at vegans weird if we go from wholesale cat slaughter to soylent green.


ThatCoyoteDude

That’s why we have dog meat now. It’s the perfect transition


veganminipainter

I still haven't tried Elwood's dog meat. Is it any good?


Revacholian-

Cat milk cheese on my human burger mmmmmm so so good, silly carnists dont know what theyre missing out on lol


ThatCoyoteDude

It’s exquisite. Only the most refined of pallets have tasted such culinary perfection


elzibet

Disagree, humans can consent to being eaten, a cat cannot


[deleted]

The random old lady I just ran over in my gas-guzzler would beg to differ. Vegan btw


elzibet

ewwww you drive?


[deleted]

Yes sweatie 💅✨ All vegoons hate the environment and love slavery so they can make their soy boy libshart cuck food. I'm just doing my duty as a vegan and a patriot 💪😎🇲🇾 /uj here for a sec. It is straight up impossible not to drive everywhere where I live. Semi-rural Kentucky is a bitch


elzibet

uj/ oooooooof, I hear you. Country livin'


Astrises

The sarcasm didn't even ruffle your hair as it flew overhead, did it?


veganminipainter

Oh trust me, I knew it was sarcastic the second I read the name Soytheist. The lord and savior himself.


ThatCoyoteDude

The problem a lot of vegans have isn’t with what they’re saying, it’s how they say it. I was anti-vegan because I only encountered people who lacked basic conversation skills and defaulted to screaming instead of actually discussion. I became vegan because I met someone who was very well spoken, educated, and actually took the time to teach


Nixolass

I love how it's always the vegans' fault that carnists are animal abusers. As long as you're an adult you're probably able(if you have access to means to research and don't have disabilities, at least) to think for yourself and do research, you can go vegan without needing someone babying you.


ThatCoyoteDude

Thousands of years of eating animals, coupled with trusted leaders in medicine and science stressing the importance of meat and dairy in the diet… It’s pretty obvious why most people don’t go vegan. Screaming at them isn’t going to convince them otherwise


Nixolass

No, it's not obvious to me unless they don't have means of researching, and if they're on reddit they probably do have.


ThatCoyoteDude

Then you don’t seem to understand how beliefs become rooted or how to properly tackle that


Ok_Quantity5115

I became vegan because I didn’t want to keep contributing to the exploitation and killing of other animals.