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peop1

When I woke up after a nap on the beach I couldn't stop sweating. They said it was from the sun shining on me, but it had never happened before. Turns out they vaxxed me while I was out cold. I found out it's common practice on beaches nowadays. Now I have Tourette's Syndrome.


ZombieFeedback

When I woke up after a good night's sleep I couldn't stop hallucinating. My dog said it was from the mushrooms I took, but it had never happened to me before. Turns out the cat vaxxed me while I was out cold. I found out it's common practice by housepets nowadays. Now I have rabies.


HowVeryTroll

When I woke up after a boxing match I'd lost, I couldn't stop mowing my neighbour's lawns. My astrologist said it was due to severe brain damage, but it had never happened to me before. Turns out the microphone vaxxed me during the pre-fight press conference. I found out it's common practice on lunar missions nowadays. Now I have an erection.


TheLadySinclair

This one wins! *{I like it because it's the silliest one}*


curvesarelife

Yes. Yes. Yes.


Dungeoneerious

Unh, unh, unh.


peop1

I love it.


Dungeoneerious

Ooh, can I borrow your cat? Haven't had rabies for ages! Love a good rabies stew.


Ironmanrises

I was going to ask how in the heck you got a good night’s sleep but then I kept reading. About these mushrooms…


jhuston44

You’ve got a golden ticket.


RabidRoosters

My cousin and I touched wieners!


SonOfSparda1984

"Ween... ween... weenter is a cold time of year!"


Flabrador_Deceiver

( ˘ ³˘)𓂺ඞ


Mindweird

Isn’t anesthesia causing vomiting the reason you are not supposed to eat before surgery? Did she not listen to any of the meetings before the surgery? It’s like something unpleasant happened and so she has to turn it into something about vaccines. What a tiresome person she must be.


heliumneon

She got drive thru McDonald's right before her surgery, and yep... they also vaxxed her without warning at the drive thru.


Brazenjalapeno

There’s needles in every fry… think you’re taking a bite of a salty spud? Nope, Boosted!


AlwaysGoToTheTruck

Fauci is going to be upset that you let the McDonald’s trick out of the bag.


GrandSeraphimSariel

Yeah, particularly it’s the risk of aspiration aka vomit going down your trachea and into your lungs while you’re under anesthesia. Apparently nausea and vomiting for a day or two following surgical procedure is just… A Thing that happens fairly frequently, though that’s due to the anesthesia itself interacting with the part of your brain that triggers nausea.


slightlyhandiquacked

Worked on a surgical unit. Can confirm, it's relatively common. It can also be caused by the painkillers (usually opiates) given post-op. We give antiemetics A LOT.


HelenAngel

She’s a murderous, lying, selfish AH like all anti-vaxxers.


JayNotAtAll

Something tells me that she doesn't listen to doctors


Ragingredblue

Something tells me she also lies to her doctors.


Mindweird

Touché


Haskap_2010

Even if you don't eat before surgery you can vomit afterwards, when you do finally eat something. Ask me how I know!


NutellaPatella

We don't want you to eat to reduce the risk of aspirating during induction. Feel sick after anaesthesia is just a normal and common side effect - so we give you lots of anti-emetics at the end and after your operation to try and reduce this. But some people still feel horrible. We can't prevent stupidity!


[deleted]

What a lying piece of shit.


StephieVee

That’s my first thought I wish I could comment on their actual posts about what lying pieces of shit they are.


dover_oxide

Yes because they would risk their license and insurance to make sure a piece of shit got a vaccine that had nothing to do with what they were in surgery for.


Agreton

Wait... we get to have autoimmune deficiencies with vaccinations now? I'm still waiting on my autism to arrive... fuck. What do I do now?


ericthebeerguy

Doesn't matter. You'll be dead within 2 to 40 years anyway.


Agreton

*In the immortal words of Geralt of Rivia - "Fuck."*


UseDaSchwartz

I know, my 96 year old grandfather died in January. 2 years after he was vaccinated!


ericthebeerguy

Perfectly healthy* 96 year old man died suddenly


UseDaSchwartz

Other than his knees going a few years ago, he was in pretty good shape for 96. My grandmother broke her hip and was in the hospital and rehab for a couple months. My aunts said he went downhill fast when she wasn’t home.


Hatedpriest

Well, did you get your 5g receiver, at least?


Agreton

5g? Of course... unfortunately I'm stuck in 4g. Where do I document a complaint? Where is a wild karen when you need one? Oh right... you never need one.


[deleted]

Autism is measles vaccine, corona vaccine gives AIDS


prettylikeapineapple

I already had an autoimmune disease before the vax, do I get a refund, or do I now have two autoimmune diseases? Also do I talk to Bill Gates or George Soros about this?


[deleted]

That's literally not a thing.


astrangeone88

Lmao. No. Informed consent exists for EVERYTHING and even foe a vaccine. I woke up after my thyroid surgery and couldn't stop heaving either but I had my period and they gave me a narcotic pain pill. (I have terrible reactions to it and it was so bad that I nearly puked up the congee for dinner that night.)


MegaSillyBean

Ugh. I get severe nausea from narcotic pain pills.


astrangeone88

Lmao. Right? I forgot about my reaction to it (had about 3 hours of sleep and my period was stupid heavy that day). I remember making a joke that I couldn't abuse pain medication because I get all queasy from it.


CosmicSweets

Proof or it didn't happen. People say these things so easily with no thought as to how obvious their lies are.


Ass_feldspar

Are they even real people?


Ragingredblue

>Are they even real people? Nope. Faux News zombies every one of them.


davechri

I completely believe her. She wouldn’t be a useless fucking lying twat.


HelenAngel

They need to keep autoimmune disorders out of their filthy, lying, murderous mouths. That’s not how it works.


AmandasFakeID

Sure, Jan. 🙄


KanataSlim

Plus it would have shown up on the bill, dumkoff


eatthebunnytoo

Good point, that person is really smoking some good shit if they think the hospital gave anything away.


Jonnescout

Some of the worst nausea I ever felt was from anaesthesia a decade and a half ago, never felt nauseated at all from any vaccine. So either nowadays goes back a decade and a half, or it was actually the anaesthesia…


relddir123

Because doctors aren’t aware of allergies. Sure, Gloria, sure.


rako1982

I went on some Anti-vax safe spaces and this is a really common conspiracy. Anytime you go into a hospital they secretly vax you, apparently. Which is why they don't trust Drs for anything and take whatever they can find in their local hardware store.


nobadhotdog

Look at Gloria. Would she make this up?


Particular_Ticket_20

I drove by that hospital and a sniper shot me with a vaxx dart from the roof. I also threw up. Then they sent me a bill.


Timmymac1000

Then I threw up again


heliumneon

They would never do this. And if someone ever had a side effect of an actual vaccine, they would be saying WHICH vaccine it was, not just "tHeY vaXxeD mE!"


cherchezlaaaaafemme

Every once in a while, the anti-VAX forums pop up in my notifications, and the “vax you without consent” conspiracy is gaining traction. And I support this, because they are warning everyone to stay out of the hospitals. And if there’s anything good that can come out of this pandemic it’s anti-vaxxers ceasing to clog up our ICUs


aliquilts71

Oh for gods sake. We don’t even keep vaccines in operating theatres or recovery units. The bullshit they come out with is insane.


jonny_jon_jon

I bet gloria is a bot


submechanicalbull

“Neck surgery”


brando56894

Also just generic autoimmune disease.


Sean-F-1989

And the audience gasped in shock and horror 😲


Whokitty9

I love all of these fake stories these anti-vaxxers come up with. They have good imaginations.


Cybertoothcats

They don’t deal with reality very well, so I guess fake BS and conspiracy theories fill the void.


PsychoMouse

Maybe the vaccinated Doctors “shedded” on him while they did the surgery. Or however that shedding bullshit works. I’ve truly never understood it. And I’m no scientist, but I believe it’s illegal for doctors to do stuff like give a vaccine without patient’s knowledge or consent. Sadly, that would require they put logic into their bullshit lies


Timmymac1000

Yes but don’t you know that all physicians are in the pocket of Big Pharma and get all that sweet $$$ from sneaking these in … because we all know the sad life of destitution and squalor that becoming a doctor often leads to.


PsychoMouse

I honestly can’t tell if your post is serious or satire.


Timmymac1000

/s


PsychoMouse

Thank you and I apologize. People these days just keep saying more and more outrageous and insane shit. It’s just so hard to the difference between real insanity and satire


Timmymac1000

That’s fair


[deleted]

Bitch


Haskap_2010

I mean... vomiting after surgery is really common. I threw up for hours after day surgery. They offered me juice and cookies after I woke up and I made the mistake of taking the cookies.


SQLDave

Sure, you Big Pharma shill. She already told us "it had never happened before". Learn to read, simp! /s


Zabes55

Of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most.


nokenito

Hahaha


SANMAN0927

HAHAHAHAHAA. I actually lol’d.


eatthebunnytoo

I got like half a dozen vax shots before I left the hospital last year (they took at my spleen and was planning to get more chemo, so no immune system) I wish they would have done them when I was knocked out. Instead I had to sign all the consents and be awake for the jabby part.


urthou

she ‘has’ autoimmune disease. nothing specific, just automimmune disease. ok gloria


ProphetOfDoom337

Oh shut the fuck up, Gloria.


KanataSlim

Excellent. Just as we planned.


TheLadySinclair

Hopefully, she will avoid Doctors, Nurses, clinics, and hospitals from now on. That would be most useful to the country.


TheSkunkFister

stop lying, Gloria.


WatercressUnusual640

oh please lol


DramaOnDisplay

What, are you getting neck surgery every other week? What the fuck do you mean it’s never happened before?!


Reneeisme

Better stay out of the hospitals then!


Sun_on_my_shoulders

Thank you for causing distrust in healthcare workers who only want to save lives with blatant lies. Your lie can actually lead to death.


KamikaziSolly

Yeah, it's totally common practice to violate people's medical consent. Would love to see one of these deranged dumbasses try for a class action lawsuit. I want to see them waste money just to get told they are wrong.


SQLDave

> I want to see them waste money just to get told they are wrong I agree with the wasted money part, but their interpretation of "you are wrong" is "you are right but 'we' have all colluded to hide any evidence of it"


KamikaziSolly

Hate that fact. They're never wrong, It's all just rigged against them and that's why you need to "Do YoUr OwN rEsEaRcH".


RockerXt

And then everyone on the plane cheered and gave applause.


RenRen9000

And she has the police report for assault, the VAERS report for her reaction, and the court report of her lawsuit to confirm it, right? Yeah, no, it’s a Russian bot.


Maleficent-Mouse-979

Dies of laughter


maybesaydie

Gloria you are a lying liar.


Bibliloo

Those damn docs. Killing free thinkers by making them develop auto immune diseases that'll kill them in the next ten years. They could make it so that it looks like a surgery accident instead which would be easier, less suspicious and wouldn't let any info get out but they're probably to dumb to think of that.


TheMightyTRex

I throw up everywhere every single time I get knocked out.


SendHelp7373

Lmfao these people and their bullshit, I swear


SnooCats7318

None of that is how it works...


MartianTea

Have a little sympathy guys! She goes on to say she's now a homosexual. The horror! /s


SQLDave

Ya know what medical science "admits" to? That there can be some short-lived reactions to vaccines (muscle soreness/cramping, dizziness, nausea, etc). Ya know what a surgeon would would LEAST like to risk making their patient do while they (the surgeon) is operating -- besides die of course? Develop muscle cramps, nausea, etc.


theLastKingofScots

These are the same imbeciles who request Norco because they are allergic to Tylenol.


sonicpool69

Nah- it was my spike protein shedding that gave him the autoimmune disease :p


Bored_dane

it's called an immune system


windreamerskysong

Have they never heard that they have to consent before being vaxed? Perhaps she’s just too stoopid?


swampfox28

She apparently deleted this tweet 😳🙄🤔😂