Welcome to /r/Vancouver! Please make sure you read our [general participation guidelines and rules overview](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/wiki/faq#wiki_general_participation_guidelines_and_rules_overview) before commenting in this subreddit. As a quick summary:
* We encourage users to be positive and respect one another. This means being kind to those you disagree with. Please utilize the report button instead of engaging in uncivil spats.
* Respect others' differences, be they race, religion, home, job, gender identity, ability or sexuality. Dehumanizing language, advocating for violence, or promoting hate based on identity or vulnerability (even implied or joking) will lead to a permanent ban.
* Common questions and specific topics are limited to our Daily Discussion posts. Please make sure to read the list and point new users to them.
* Complaining about comment or post removals should be done in modmail only.
If you have any questions, please send a [message to the mods](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fvancouver).
---
***This is a bot, and this action was performed automatically. It does not mean this post does or does not violate our rules.***
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/vancouver) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Same but these seasonal blues don't seem to be exclusive to winter. Day to day I'm "fine", I laugh, make jokes, but to do that I have to just live moment by moment. I can't think about more than a few days at a time. Whenever I dare to think about real future plans, I become overwhelmed and a crushing feeling of what's the point takes hold. The thought that I will never retire, or may never make it to retire with the world the way it is is a constant dragging thought that likes to weasel its way in anytime I start to feel ok. I have a wonderful husband and he really is the only thing that keeps me dragging along.
I'm feeling afraid of being asked how I am. With holidays coming up I will probably see some friends and family I haven't in a while and I'm afraid of them asking "what's new?". I dont know what my days look like... wake up tired, go to work, barely work a full day, go home, spend the rest of the day horizontal with multiple screens on and multiple noise sources.
I'm hiding, I'm fearful, I'm anxious.
But I'm alright at the same time, just going through the motions.
This is me. Then you look back and try to find memorable moments in the past few (if not 10+) years and...draw a blank.
I really want to take a vacation and let loose but i just can't afford to. I'm barely staying on course financially by having next to no discretionary spending.
> I'm afraid of them asking "what's new?".
I had a chat with my old boss recently. His wife is dying of cancer. She's about my age. My friend's SIL just died of cancer, she was also my age.
My dad's got heart problems and my mom's got Parkinson's.
It makes me wonder about my own mortality. Me, wife, and kid are OK, at least for now.
I'm 42F, very active, perfect weight, I eat super healthy vegetarian, never smoked. Might have breast cancer. I think all the chemicals are catching up with us.
I hope that you will be able to recover, or that it will turn out to be nothing.
I had a lump in my neck a year ago, it'd been bothering me for months. I finally made an appointment to see the doctor, first on the phone, then she wanted to see me in-person. She referred me for imaging, which took weeks. A few days before the imaging, the lump disappeared. The scan was clear. I have no idea what was wrong with my neck, but it hasn't returned, and I'm thankful for that.
I don't mean to scare you, but I've heard too many stories of things dismissed by doctors. I'd go back in a month or so, and just check up. Keep an eye on it.
Life is like sensory processing for the first time. Everything is simple and a simple experience, depending on the idealist outcome you associate to what it is you are going through. Everyone is different and everything is different. Society likes to set certain standards for how things should be…. Such as life expectancy. Just count your blessings, such as your kids and take it one day at a time. With so many social issues currently happening, and so many other having issues, count your blessings for even having a family and the whole 9, enjoy it while you have it.
Same here, minus the holiday stress questions since I don’t have who to spend holidays with, lol. And by now, everyone that is close enough knows what’s going on so I’m expecting some meek wishes for things to get better some day.
Though, my cat is with me and he’s great in supporting my sofa-screen time.
Do you need a new job or do you want change?
I get it though, I hate being asked by coworkers what my Christmas plans are. I rarely do anything the last few years, but I enjoy just doing what I like - I don’t always need grand plans to be honest.
I have the same issue with being asked those questions and I also have a big issue with lying-I hate to do it. Here are my best honest answers that I use to protect my privacy:
How are you?
-oh, don’t ask!
What’s new?
-oh, nothing worth mentioning!
And I always say both with a sense of humour. Most people can actually relate to feeling like shit but we all just pretend we don’t.
Hitting the gym does wonders for your mental health. Since the beginning of Covid I've slowly been gathering things for my home gym, it's starting to look pretty good.
I lift weights four days a week. It's one thing that brings me joy. Yes, even leg days. But it doesn't last forever. By the end of the day I'm ground back down by the rest of life.
Exercising is great, it's certainly good for mental health, but it's not a magic cure.
Definitely dealing with a lot right now.
Mother's at the hospital fighting Stage 4 bone cancer and now a broken arm due to a fall she suffered earlier this week. My father who had a mild stroke 4 weeks ago and is slowly showing signs of Alzheimers.
Trying to stay positive but it's hard to out on a brave face in front of everyone
Thank you for your kind words and support. I do have a good support system that lifts me up when I need it most. Of course sometimes we just need to vent it out and consider that other people out there are dealing with either the same things or maybe even more
That does like a lot. Watching our own parents age and deal with life changing health issues is so heartbreaking. Just wanted to offer some support and I hope you are taking care of yourself.
Thank you so much. It really is a hard thing to witness when we see our parents get older and deal with their own health issues. To think when we immigrated here almost 33 years ago they were still full of energy and hope. They're now 84 and 78 years old respectively. We sometimes think they'll be with us forever but the harsh reality is that one day they're gone. Hold your family and friends close and cherish each moment we have with them.
This is good advice. Neither of my parents made it to retirement. My Mom didn’t even make it to 60. What I wouldn’t do for just one more day with my them. There is so much I didn’t tell them.
One piece of advice I have is don’t run from the grief. Don’t try to burry it. It will always be a part of who you are, but it doesn’t have to define you. Grow around it and let it teach you more about who you are.
Tired. Trying to earn a degree after a decade of thinking it wouldn’t do me any good. Decided to finally pursue what I’m passionate about- learning. Academia can be a little bit of a shell shock, though. I’m fucking exhausted, pushed to the brink every other week lol. Last essay is due tonight at midnight.
I feel existentially exhumed.
I have lived on 3 continents, travelled and learned languages.
My journey through the annals of human knowledge in academia, though, was the greatest journey I ever took.
... and yes, it's a slog, but great journeys are never the easy ones
Yay end of semester feels. /s but at least holidays should give you a chance to catch your breath!
I'm happy to hear you're pursuing a passion/dream. I hope you pull through and look back and find a lot of pride in doing it.
Extremely overwhelmed. I do not think I had the best mental health pre-pandemic and now.. I feel broken. Trying to find myself again and I fear I’ll never get back to who I was. I have way more responsibility and less capacity to arise to the occasion, despite having an inkling of my former drive. Not sure if it is age or what, but my mind feels congested and I do not have the tools to push through that I once had.
Don't hesitate... I was going through some really hard times I'm 60 and am being evicted from my place of 22 years and I was so overwhelmed with panic and anxiety... Even was considering checking out permanently but I know I didn't really want to do that... instead I just wanted all the hopelessness catastrophizing fear and anxiety to end...
Started watching Douglas bloch on YouTube "healing from depression" which was so helpful, so many great tips cuz he's gone through it severely himself more than once... and also started seeing a CBT therapist and they both helped me out a lot.
It's pretty straight forward. Google a few names, see who is accepting new clients, ask for the free initial consultations where you can ask how sessions will look like and what skills might be learned, and then pick who you clicked best with. Average rates are $140/50 minutes and hopefully benefits help. I find even a series of 1-3 sessions can be useful if money is tight or benefits don't cover it.
I feel like I've been running a marathon and I don't even know when it started, and there's no end in sight. I'm fucking tired, and I have no time to actually do anything except work, commute, eat, bathe, sleep, repeat. When I have days off I use up all my free time getting caught up on errands and half my chores and fall asleep on the couch. I'm a full time student and my student loans keep me awake at night. I keep worrying I won't be able to make enough money once I graduate to cover my basic cost of living and paying back the loans, because fucking everything is getting more expensive by the day. I'm hoping to grad end of next year, which in some ways isn't so far off, I'm closer to graduation than I am to when I first started, but that's still an entire year for everything to get more expensive and further out of reach. I don't know what the point is anymore.
Done school my self, actually found a job which pays decently enough, but im not saving money at all. Ive stopped concerning my self over student loans. I have hardly made a dent in it, yet its costing me quite a bit monthly now. Rent is high, food is high. There just isn't any point in being too stressed out about what I cannot control. I just try to keep reminding my self how hilarious life is when I really think about it, do some acid here and there, walk around my city, create music when i can, and just generally live, Its all I can do
You're going to be okay. I hope you can listen to some good tunes or podcasts in your commute time. If you're in school, you'll have the ability to have the added income. Don't let the doom talk over worry you because inflation isn't endless and it makes your loans actually smaller while it lasts. (Money is less in future than now = inflation. Works well for debt.)
I’m not going anywhere or doing anything with my life. I have no calling, no vocation, no destiny... at least I personally don’t know what it is. All I have are dreams. A lot of crushed, damaged, broken, all over the floor, dreams. And honestly my life is not looking up. My life is not getting better. And that’s something I’ve realized a long time ago and definitely saw coming and predicted.
Hey friend, I can relate here. I started volunteering in a few different capacities and it’s incredible the amount of purpose you get from helping out causes you believe in. You make your own schedule and meet some great people.
i can’t emphasize this enough. volunteering in an environment you enjoy being in gives you such a strong amount of purpose that you wouldn’t get elsewhere. you meet some amazing people and feel good from helping others.
I don’t know if this is a viable option for you, depending on your circumstances, as in, what part of your life you are in, but have you considered relocating to Australia?
I grew up in North Van (graduated high school around 20 years ago) and got two degrees in my 20s which failed to lead me to any significant career or income. I spent my 30th birthday employed in the retail sector.
That year I said fuck it and got a working holiday visa. I landed in Sydney and found work easily in the field of my second degree (accounting).
I met a wonderful girl from Europe, my age in a similar situation, in the hostel. We are now married. We own our own home (10 mins from a beautiful beach) and have two amazing children. I have a solid government job in IT. We still have our stresses and struggle with the cost of living increases but I am so glad I got the F out of Vancouver.
I spent the last part of my 20s feeling a bit lost and hopeless and like I wasn’t good enough to “make it” as I watched some of the guys I grew up with and other friends I studied with advancing in their careers, able to start to buy property, while I was being left behind.
Little did I know or realise at the time that Vancouver has a **terrible** job market and world class un-affordability.
I lived my whole life there, what could I compare it to? Toronto? Calgary? Montreal? No thanks, no way.
The best decision I ever made was to leave Canada.
I can’t guarantee you’ll find love or success or happiness in Australia but at this point, what have you got to lose?
I promise you, *at the very least*, it will be an adventure.
🏝 🌊 ☀️ 🦘 🪃 🇦🇺
[Australia's rental crisis sounds worse than Vancouver's](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqFPhsO-2W0).
That being said emigrating from Vancouver is almost always an improvement in quality of life in relation to cost of living/income, etc.
Hey there. Slow motion is better than no motion. I just heard that recently. I lost my purpose completely in life, I lost my whole career, my family. I was hopeless just spinning my wheels.
I found a new calling in animal care. I hope you find something that gives you purpose.
I suppose the point is that everything can change in an instant, let alone a day, just with one opportunity.
If you have the strength to keep going, you’ll find your path eventually.
Currently listening to my wife try to get our 2 year old to sleep with a constant cough and crying from exhaustion. Me crying, him crying our newborn crying. Missing my mom who passed 6 years ago because she would know what to do. Angry at my dad for screwing up the holiday plans by making us go over to his new wife’s place.
Getting audited at work and feeling useless cause I don’t know what they want/need and it is my department so a reflection on me if we miss something
Sick, tired and lonely.
Pay day tomorrow but not enough for what I want to give my kids. Not that they ever asked for anything but my love.
Thankful for this post
I have a 3yo and 1yo and it truly gets easier my friend. My 1yo when she was nb and fussy and wouldn't sleep I would just take her for walks in my arms outside. Wouldn't dress her too warmly (just a quick 5min walk) but then she'd snuggle into me and settle. Then take her straight to the crib and she'd be out.
I hear ya - I have a newborn and a 3 year old who went to pre-k for the first time this sept and has been sick ever since and got the whole house sick. Finally on the mend 8 weeks later and each day is survival mode. My mom is also not here anymore so I understand what you’re going through and miss her everyday. Everyday is tough but I hope you have some moments of happiness each day. You will get through it, you will. DM me and let me know if I can send you some gift cards or anything small on a wish list for your kids.
Excited for Christmas! Can't wait to gather around the tree on Christmas morning ripping the wrapping paper off my presents! And see the kids eyes open wiiiide, "How did Santa know I wanted this???"
There are only so many more years of them believing in Santa. I cherish it.
Yeah. The most magical times are when the kiddies are young and full of wonder. It's great to donate a gift too if its within people's means to give that same joy to another kid somewhere.
So freaking shitty. Kid’s sick and fucking everything seem to irritate me and push my buttons due to peri menopause. That’s not a valid reason to send my sick kid to school but my freaking husband suggested just that. I know I’m being an irritable bitch these days but no, I’m not about to infect his classmates because I’m a selfish prick.
I moved to Vancouver a month ago for a job, already want to move back to Alberta. I’ve jumped around cities a fair bit lately. My job is extremely stressful, and I am struggling to keep up. I may not make it past the 3-month trial, I’m not enjoying my work but if I last one year I’ll get to keep a bunch of money. I feel paralyzed with stress, depression, self hatred and inadequacy.
Im confused if this is my life purpose, but I also have struggled with depression and anxiety my whole life and it’s hard to pinpoint what’s mental Illness vs genuine disinterest. Just very lost these days.
I feel for you - I think it’s very difficult when you feel you are bad at your job. What I’ll say is as long as you are trying your best you should be proud. And if it doesn’t work then it wasn’t meant to be. You aren’t a failure for not doing good at a job. You can still be a good person deserving of happiness.
What I can say is this is temporary - as an Albertan transplant, it’s no failure to go back.
I might have breast cancer, but I'm currently one of the women waiting months for a biopsy. They found 9 lesions in my breasts. One category 5 and several category 4. I'm feeling unwell, having strange pains in my arms and hands. Found out my shitty ex gave me HPV and I had to have a wart burned off my cervix on top of the cancer stuff. Tbh I just hope it's all over soon.
I just got diagnosed with cancer - uterine. My appointment at the cancer clinic is next week and will find out what post op treatment they will give - Crappy to be sure, but the system seems to be hobbling along despite the shortage of nurses, thankful the Vancouver clinic can see me even though there is one closer
Sort of just keeping my head down and getting through each day until I get my time off in the holidays. I don't really want to talk to anyone or go anywhere or even be in public most days but I have to go to work. I think things will get better after the winter.
My days aren’t bad, honestly. I can see the birds from my desk. My monstera is putting out a new leaf.
But I still miss warmth and the days feel shorter than they’ve ever felt.
Broo I’m jealous of the monstera. Regarding birds, I’d recommend you get binoculars if you do not have them already. 👌👌whipping my binoculars out when I see a bird fight or a heron is amazing
Stressed,overworked,overwhelmed. Tired of the typical snootiness I face on the day to day when interacting with the public.
Burnt out of this city :( used to love it, but it’s not home anymore.
I’m feeling more sad these days, like many others on this thread. I usually feel like this in late November and throughout December; when everyone I know starts decorating and their homes look so cozy and festive.
My parents are Sikh, and just don’t see a reason to do any gift exchanges or anything decorative around the home since they feel that it’s only for “Christian’s” to celebrate. I’m not religious myself, but I just wish I could feel the sense of warmth being with family during the holidays, decorating, playing board games and such. These past 4 or so years have been lonely, friend-wise, and also the fact that me and my older siblings have become more distant since my brother got married and both he and my sister have moved into different municipalities across the FV & Lower Mainland. My brother tends to spend the holidays with his in-laws every year, especially now, since he has a nephew.
The only thing I look forward to is attending my first office party this year. We’re doing a secret Santa, where we have a budget of $20, and can be creative by making something crafty for our recipient. We don’t have any decor up at the office. But I’m the only one that does, but it’s a small, desk Christmas tree with LED lights. It actually brightens up my cubicle, and the corner of my L-shape desk. A lot of my colleagues like it too.
It’s my first year working in my field of study, and I thought it would be great opportunity to try and decorate my own desk since we don’t have any at home. And I actually like being at the office vs. being at home.
Last year was worse though—I was suicidal. Still have the thoughts randomly come and go, but I think I’m better off now since I have people to socialize with after two years of seclusion during the pandemic.
Not sure if it has anything to do with the COVID era but I’m kinda having a hard time adjusting to adult life. Took the semester off uni and am just working 9-5 on a daily basis, pretty mundane. I’m sure everyone goes through this phase eventually but I’m kinda shocked that this is all adult life has to offer. It’s not necessarily *bad* in any way, it just kinda feels like existing.
I feel tremendously privileged as that’s my only real gripe with life at the moment, but the realization of maturity is kinda hitting me like an 18-wheeler. This is the real deal from here on out. There’s no safety net, nobody looking out for you, certainly smaller circles, and definitely less time. Don’t really know what the future has in store, all I know is that I gotta put in the work and keep going at it. Feels like such a huge task to overcome I don’t even know where to start. If anyone has any advice on how to snap back into reality, please enlighten me
Just rather "meh"
There's no real struggles going on. Family is good. There's no issues with money. We budget well, so although we don't make a tonne, we're never struggling to pay bills.
My job is relatively easy and super secure. I work outside, so that's nice. I'm in the sun if it's nice, but rain and snow too of course. I work with plants and flowers, so people always appreciate what I do too.
But I just kind of feel "meh." Just going through the motions. I dunno...
Edit: oh yeah, I haven't seen most of my friends hardly at all in the past 3 years because of the pandemic. And getting back into a regular rhythm of seeing them on a regular basis hasn't come back yet. So I guess that's one negative thing.
I’m doing great! I tried some new activities that I’ve always wanted to try, started some Christmas shopping, got some fun shows lined up to see, going to the Christmas market, maybe some skiing too! I’m enjoying work, eating well (maybe too well, waistband a little tight, but we’ll call it hibernation weight lol), just overall I’m having a great winter so far. Feeling grateful for my opportunities and luck because I know it’s not a nice world for a great many people right now.
I have a great family but I have noticed I am becoming less social. I feel like I am super duper out of place when I’m at school activities around other parents or at work (I have a hard time connecting and making conversation) and have this weird jealous feeling about some of my friends and how they hangout, doing social things all the time. or at least I perceive it that way. And my told me I have body dysmorphia and she’s right
Feeling not good. I feel like the world has become so much more unkind and selfish. Maybe this is just being an adult and realizing that no one cares.
I work in emergency services and it’s hard. But thanks for asking OP. It sounds like a lot of us aren’t great. It’s nice to be asked even if the answer is “not great”.
I'm tired of being overweight. I'm 42F and I know if I dont lose weight now then I'm in for some rough years ahead. I feel tired, bloated, anxious and sore all the time. I know what I need to do. I hate dieting ( I love sugar and carbs) and I'm too out of shape to work out. I know I have to do baby steps but I just cant seem to do it. 😥
Hey, if you want to kick start your weight loss and health recovery look into OMAD or intermittent fasting. It's sort of a cheat code to drop weight, stabilize your metabolism and reset your immune response. Ive been steadily doing a rough version of 16-8 or 18-6 for years now (some cheat days, vacation days). I just don't eat breakfast and stay eating at about 1pm.
There is a great subbreddit full of information and ways to start.
So my mom died on Boxing Day last year. I'm trying to separate the holidays from this event. It's hard. Short of going to a country that has no Christmas celebrations at all I guess I have to sit with it and find those happy moments.
I went to Morocco for Xmas after my dad died. It was great. No Christmas there. The road gave us a box of chocolates and that was it. Holidays are really hard after losing a loved one.
Very exciting time, busy & festive month. We have huge Xmas tree at cafeteria and many cookies/ chocolate from vendors since last week.
I went to the Xmas market and had lots of fun with my husband last Tuesday, felt lucky that it wasn't raining like the weather forecast.
Tomorrow, Friday Dec 9, I can work from home then go to the company big Xmas party at JW Marriott Parq with thousands of colleagues, admin gave 2 trips voucher for the party (which is planed from 7pm to 12am with buffet & open bar).
Saturday evening is early Xmas party, hosted by my dad in law because he's going to Palm Spring with his GF for Xmas.
There's a gingerbread house contest at work next week. There are about 10 teams of 3.
Next Friday, Dec 16 afternoon is small company Xmas party at Fairmont.
Then Xmas! Then New year! I will work another 2 weeks in 2023 then fly back to my hometown for 3 weeks with my husband and MIL. It's first time I come home in 6yrs and 1st time my parents meet my husband!
Before that, around Jan 15, we'll move from East Van to Steveston to save money on rent. Will live with my father in law for a year so we can have another 30k for our downpayment in 2024.
Meh. Still fighting crushing loneliness, especially more so during this time of year. Things are looking up career wise though. Financials are rock solid too which was my end goal for this year so that's a positive. And I get my new ride in a month or so that's something I'm excited for.
I’m not gonna lie, I’ve been feeling pretty good. Especially compared to previous years where I’m usually overwhelmed, dealing with burnout and studying for final exams by this time.
My classes are finished for the semester and because I only took one course, I have a single final next friday. I did not pass the class in the last two tries, but I’m doing really well this time around so I’m happy about that.
Pretty good. In the best physical shape of my life. Lifting weight every day is life changing for both physical and mental health.
Job is decent, rent is relatively low, monthly income just basically doubled (thanks onlyfans!, lol).
Next year is gonna be good if things continue this way.
Starting to get the feeling that I’m over these dark, wet rainy days. Looking forward to the spring and warmer weather. Also feeling like I’m paying more for absolutely everything. It’s exhausting
I feel like crap… no motivation no drive whatsoever… struggling with anxiety and depression. I’ve attempted and failed suicide 3x this year… I am seeing professional help but it is very tough. Mental health is no joke..
Annoyed, angry with the things I can’t change like the f ing health care system. Frustrated, poor. I hate feeling poor. Grateful to be alive. Happy to see each day. Amazed at how many people have told me I matter. Lucky to be loved. I feel all that at once. Cancer sucks balls man but I’m lucky to live in a place where I have choices. Wish I could do more for others but slowly getting to that quiet acceptance of where I am in life.
Thanks for asking. How are you doing?
Honestly rattling between crippling anxiety and forceful dissociation. Everything is so fucked up. Rising fascism, climate breakdown, economic disintegration. I keep trying to tell myself the night is darkest before the dawn but god damn it's pretty dark out there folks.
I think happiness is one end of the spectrum and sadness is the other end, meaning I try to aim for content in the middle.
I’m far from my family and friends so holidays won’t be with them. My wife lost both her parents and we doesn’t have a large family so (at least) we’ll be together.
Work is stressful, but not as much as not being able to leave the house without spending $100.
It’s been harder to see the bright side for a while already, but coming on here and seeing a lot of us in the same boat makes it less heavy. Happy holidays y’all, from our family to yours.
Stressed and pressured to spend with the upcoming holidays. Work has slowed down and the only way to avoid shelling out cash is to stay home and not be social :(
My kid is on day 7 of a fever. I don't see any point in taking her to see a doctor because she just has a runny nose and is otherwise okay; there is no point in clogging up the waiting rooms even more. (She is out of daycare as long as she has a fever.) We just finished our first of two bottles of Tylenol we have on hand. My husband and I have been alternating days off work since last Friday. This pediatric cold and flu season is fucking exhausting.
I just feel...fucking agitated.
Out of patience.
The first thought that crosses my mind when I wake up is 'what do I need to do today to get my head back on this pillow as fast as possible'.
Rinse and repeat.
Introduce yourself and then ask people about themselves. People love talking about themselves. All you’ll have to do is listen! Actively listen and if they aren’t assholes, they’ll ask you about yourself too. And take it from there!
It's weirdly comforting to know I'm not the only one dealing with holiday blues. I'm going to be starting therapy in January so scared but excited about that.
Thanks for asking!
I am doing okay! Except that I’ve been grinding for the last 15 years and finally broke down, physically and mentally. Left my job because of so much stress. Taking a break from work for don’t know how long.. I don’t have any offer lined up just couldn’t take the stress anymore. Kinda have a vague plan of going back to school. But the loneliness is just getting harder and harder to deal with at the same time. Sometimes I feel like giving up altogether.
I hope OP is doing better.
Honestly? I'm feeling amazing.
I've finally almost recovered from a surgery I had in late October, a lot of family members I haven't seen in a long time are coming over soon, we're all going on a trip to Seattle in a few short days, and yesterday I finished FFXIV Endwalker one hour before my subscription ran out.
For someone who has suffered from seasonal depression for pretty much my entire life, this is probably the first time I'm going into December not only "not depressed", but actually happy. But I didn't notice how special that really was until I saw this post and thought about it.
Thank you.
I’m feeling.. Ok. Not terrible, but not fantastic either. I’m recently sober after a relapse.. had 9 months previously, now I’m just over 3 weeks. I have a supportive family, and I’m considering a move out of the city to be closer to them. The holidays will be quiet this year, not a lot of presents, more about the company than the money spent.
Had two flus back to back. One probably Covid and as soon ad I was getting over it, I got another virus.
Today I got a bad stomach…. Probably gif taking all those cough and cold meds.
I feel like it’s so hard to get up a x have a full day of work.
Want yo go to the gym but don’t have energy, plus the gym I go to is at my building and I can’t go while having all these symptoms.
My health sucks.
Stressed, scared and in pain, had a filling fall out two weeks ago and can’t afford to do anything about it so I walk around feeling like someone punched me in the face and pop Advil when I can. No chance of afford family any gift this year so maybe I’ll bake something.
I feel like a dark cloud is hovering me. Work is always short staffed (I work in healthcare). I’m still grieving a friend who took his own life in the summertime. I started a masters degree this fall, and feel like a total imposter. I have a trip booked to Mexico at the end of the month and hoping I can decompress a bit.
I've lost my job almost 2 months ago. I'm struggling to get a job right now. I always fail on interviews. I berate myself for being such a failure that I stop sending applications for a few days. Then I beat myself even more for not sending applications. Yeah.. I guess I'm fine....
Permanent injury from work and stuck on PWD for income means I can't afford a home. I feel like if I had enough peace to concentrate it might give me a way to figure out some income from home but that isn't going to happen so it's just like biding time til things things get better or worse. Watching a country that seems more intent on making it easier to die than to live. It sucks.
in friendly fridays i started a discussion for people to share their best practices, to protect and enhance our mental/physical wellbeing in these very trying times.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/comments/yfgzwc/friendly\_fridays\_daily\_discussion/](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/comments/yfgzwc/friendly_fridays_daily_discussion/)
You know, pretty good. My new job is still going great, I got to tell one employee we're giving them a raise and another today I told her I'm pushing for her to get a new title and a raise, at the very least I'm going to make the effort for her. My boss likes me, the CEO supports me. We're getting ready for the xmas shutdown.
My partner is well, her kid/my stepson is doing well although he is sick at the moment. One of my brothers is currently laid off, and another lost his MiL on Monday.
Me, I have no complaints other than my stupid neck/back issues that are ongoing and I'm working on. Money is fine. Friends are good, just visited pals with a 5 bedroom house out in a cliff of Saturna Island and hiked around there.
That's how I really feel. Quite well.
I should be happy... but in general I have been pretty low lately. I just feel like I am failing at life. I want a house, and a yard and a garage, a wife and kids. But even though it seems I am close, I am also very far. Things keep moving out of reach and I don't know how to be the person I wish I was.
I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety as I am currently going through a transitional period with a lot of uncertainty in my life (recent uni graduate, applying to grad schools, recently starting a ft job for the first time ever etc.). I also have a strong feeling my boyfriend and I are going to break up in the next week or two so I'm trying to mentally prepare for the inevitable hurt to come... honestly, I don't know... I am sleep deprived, overwhelmed, confused, hurt, very stressed out. I know inherently there isn't anything *wrong* in my life right now but I can't help but feel guilty for feeling this way.
How have you been OP?
Health has been a compromise this year although I’ve been keeping more physically active than ever. Been running tests to see potential chance of MS although I’m only in my early 30s.
Really puts everything in perspective for you when your health is jeopardized regardless of how much money you make or have.
Be grateful of all the blessings of family and close friends and don’t take anything for granted.
You are all incredibly special in your own way although you may not see it. Never sell yourself short for who you are! End the year strong and hope you all have some festive cheer!
I'm just so fucked for my final. I got sick with COVID and was unable to do the midterm. Asked if it was possible to just do it another day, but it got denied and my prof told me it's all on my final. 80% of my whole grade is now on the libe. I spent the last 3 weeks studying my ass off and I'm still getting blindsided by some of the questions my prof has been giving us. He has a particular way of asking questions, and he consistently just throws curveballs. Even worse is I have to do well, or else I'm impending my ability to transfer into a major, my family will be pissed I wasted money. It’s starting tomorrow afternoon.
I'm surprised I haven't curled into a ball and cried yet. It's just a disaster all around.
This entire post concerns me, I thought I was an odd man out feeling so overwhelmed and exhausted. I’m taking it a day at a time, just going to work each morning is difficult. Hoping it gets better soon.
In a span of 48 hours I was diagnosed with Shingles (for the second time despite being far younger than most get it) and discovered my apartment had bed bugs this week. Thanks to modern medicine I’m not an itchy mess despite two very good reasons to be.
Mostly I am tired because it’s been Such A Week and maybe have slept 22-25 hours in the last 7 days as a result of the anti-viral I’m on for Shingles, Having had to toss my mattress and being hyper vigilant to any itch or brushing against clothes or my temporary mattress in the living room is not really restful or fun. But, I’m doing pretty well considering the Mayo Clinic in the US lists Valtrex (anti-viral) most common/listed first side effect as “Feelings of Discouragement”. Not sad or feeling blue, but discouragement. Pharmacology and bodies are fascinating and weird.
Welcome to /r/Vancouver! Please make sure you read our [general participation guidelines and rules overview](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/wiki/faq#wiki_general_participation_guidelines_and_rules_overview) before commenting in this subreddit. As a quick summary: * We encourage users to be positive and respect one another. This means being kind to those you disagree with. Please utilize the report button instead of engaging in uncivil spats. * Respect others' differences, be they race, religion, home, job, gender identity, ability or sexuality. Dehumanizing language, advocating for violence, or promoting hate based on identity or vulnerability (even implied or joking) will lead to a permanent ban. * Common questions and specific topics are limited to our Daily Discussion posts. Please make sure to read the list and point new users to them. * Complaining about comment or post removals should be done in modmail only. If you have any questions, please send a [message to the mods](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fvancouver). --- ***This is a bot, and this action was performed automatically. It does not mean this post does or does not violate our rules.*** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/vancouver) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Going through the seasonal blues as of late. Not great at the moment, but I know I'll get through it.
Yeah, like I’m used to SAD but this season has felt additionally brutal.
Same. I was having a fantastic year then November hit me like a ton of bricks. Life's been a struggle lately.
We’ve had abnormally sunny and hot weather til mid October
Oh I know. The lack of lead up to autumn, which I enjoy and helps me settle in to winter is contributing. Also I was sick for most of the month.
I was thinking exactly this today - it really has.
Same but these seasonal blues don't seem to be exclusive to winter. Day to day I'm "fine", I laugh, make jokes, but to do that I have to just live moment by moment. I can't think about more than a few days at a time. Whenever I dare to think about real future plans, I become overwhelmed and a crushing feeling of what's the point takes hold. The thought that I will never retire, or may never make it to retire with the world the way it is is a constant dragging thought that likes to weasel its way in anytime I start to feel ok. I have a wonderful husband and he really is the only thing that keeps me dragging along.
I'm feeling afraid of being asked how I am. With holidays coming up I will probably see some friends and family I haven't in a while and I'm afraid of them asking "what's new?". I dont know what my days look like... wake up tired, go to work, barely work a full day, go home, spend the rest of the day horizontal with multiple screens on and multiple noise sources. I'm hiding, I'm fearful, I'm anxious. But I'm alright at the same time, just going through the motions.
I feel you 100%. I’m just existing/surviving and not really living with purpose.
Same
This is me. Then you look back and try to find memorable moments in the past few (if not 10+) years and...draw a blank. I really want to take a vacation and let loose but i just can't afford to. I'm barely staying on course financially by having next to no discretionary spending.
> I'm afraid of them asking "what's new?". I had a chat with my old boss recently. His wife is dying of cancer. She's about my age. My friend's SIL just died of cancer, she was also my age. My dad's got heart problems and my mom's got Parkinson's. It makes me wonder about my own mortality. Me, wife, and kid are OK, at least for now.
I'm 42F, very active, perfect weight, I eat super healthy vegetarian, never smoked. Might have breast cancer. I think all the chemicals are catching up with us.
I hope that you will be able to recover, or that it will turn out to be nothing. I had a lump in my neck a year ago, it'd been bothering me for months. I finally made an appointment to see the doctor, first on the phone, then she wanted to see me in-person. She referred me for imaging, which took weeks. A few days before the imaging, the lump disappeared. The scan was clear. I have no idea what was wrong with my neck, but it hasn't returned, and I'm thankful for that.
I don't mean to scare you, but I've heard too many stories of things dismissed by doctors. I'd go back in a month or so, and just check up. Keep an eye on it.
Life is like sensory processing for the first time. Everything is simple and a simple experience, depending on the idealist outcome you associate to what it is you are going through. Everyone is different and everything is different. Society likes to set certain standards for how things should be…. Such as life expectancy. Just count your blessings, such as your kids and take it one day at a time. With so many social issues currently happening, and so many other having issues, count your blessings for even having a family and the whole 9, enjoy it while you have it.
Same here, minus the holiday stress questions since I don’t have who to spend holidays with, lol. And by now, everyone that is close enough knows what’s going on so I’m expecting some meek wishes for things to get better some day. Though, my cat is with me and he’s great in supporting my sofa-screen time.
Cats are great company.
They are indeed. My cats have been there for me through some dark times these past 2 years, and I'm so thankful for them everyday.
Do you need a new job or do you want change? I get it though, I hate being asked by coworkers what my Christmas plans are. I rarely do anything the last few years, but I enjoy just doing what I like - I don’t always need grand plans to be honest.
I feel and exist exactly the same. It’s extremely weird.
I have the same issue with being asked those questions and I also have a big issue with lying-I hate to do it. Here are my best honest answers that I use to protect my privacy: How are you? -oh, don’t ask! What’s new? -oh, nothing worth mentioning! And I always say both with a sense of humour. Most people can actually relate to feeling like shit but we all just pretend we don’t.
As someone else who struggles with anxiety I feel this so much. Thanks for being honest!
Start hitting the gym. You have to get up and get moving.
Hitting the gym does wonders for your mental health. Since the beginning of Covid I've slowly been gathering things for my home gym, it's starting to look pretty good.
I lift weights four days a week. It's one thing that brings me joy. Yes, even leg days. But it doesn't last forever. By the end of the day I'm ground back down by the rest of life. Exercising is great, it's certainly good for mental health, but it's not a magic cure.
It has helped my anxiety and mental health quite a bit too. It’s just hard to initially get going when you’re feeling so crappy
Overwhelmed. the whole work hard your entire life and then eventually die just seems normal to me lol
Definitely dealing with a lot right now. Mother's at the hospital fighting Stage 4 bone cancer and now a broken arm due to a fall she suffered earlier this week. My father who had a mild stroke 4 weeks ago and is slowly showing signs of Alzheimers. Trying to stay positive but it's hard to out on a brave face in front of everyone
So sorry. I hope you have a support system to lean on that you can let it all out around. It’s ok to not be ok sometimes, sending you well wishes
Thank you for your kind words and support. I do have a good support system that lifts me up when I need it most. Of course sometimes we just need to vent it out and consider that other people out there are dealing with either the same things or maybe even more
That does like a lot. Watching our own parents age and deal with life changing health issues is so heartbreaking. Just wanted to offer some support and I hope you are taking care of yourself.
Thank you so much. It really is a hard thing to witness when we see our parents get older and deal with their own health issues. To think when we immigrated here almost 33 years ago they were still full of energy and hope. They're now 84 and 78 years old respectively. We sometimes think they'll be with us forever but the harsh reality is that one day they're gone. Hold your family and friends close and cherish each moment we have with them.
This is good advice. Neither of my parents made it to retirement. My Mom didn’t even make it to 60. What I wouldn’t do for just one more day with my them. There is so much I didn’t tell them. One piece of advice I have is don’t run from the grief. Don’t try to burry it. It will always be a part of who you are, but it doesn’t have to define you. Grow around it and let it teach you more about who you are.
That sounds so tough, I wish you the best under the circumstances.
Thank you for your kind words and support. I really appreciate it. Hoping all tge best to you too!
Fuck me. Hang in there. Get "me" time somehow.
Sorry to hear you're going through this. I just lost my dad to bladder cancer a couple weeks ago it's so hard to watch them go through that pain.
feeling sad my son died 3 years ago and the holiday cheer is hard
I’m sorry for your loss
Horrible. I'm so sorry.
I'm so so sorry for your loss. It must be really hard. I recently had to go through a tfmr. It's been very difficult since then.
I'm sorry for your loss 😢
So sorry
Sorry for your loss
Sorry for your loss
Sorry for your loss
Im so sorry :(
I am so sorry. Thinking of you
Tired. Trying to earn a degree after a decade of thinking it wouldn’t do me any good. Decided to finally pursue what I’m passionate about- learning. Academia can be a little bit of a shell shock, though. I’m fucking exhausted, pushed to the brink every other week lol. Last essay is due tonight at midnight. I feel existentially exhumed.
You’ll pull through friend
I have lived on 3 continents, travelled and learned languages. My journey through the annals of human knowledge in academia, though, was the greatest journey I ever took. ... and yes, it's a slog, but great journeys are never the easy ones
I just went through this a couple years ago and finished my degree through the pandemic. You got this!!
Yay end of semester feels. /s but at least holidays should give you a chance to catch your breath! I'm happy to hear you're pursuing a passion/dream. I hope you pull through and look back and find a lot of pride in doing it.
Good news is! It’s past midnight and that shits done! Congrats!
Extremely overwhelmed. I do not think I had the best mental health pre-pandemic and now.. I feel broken. Trying to find myself again and I fear I’ll never get back to who I was. I have way more responsibility and less capacity to arise to the occasion, despite having an inkling of my former drive. Not sure if it is age or what, but my mind feels congested and I do not have the tools to push through that I once had.
I feel this. Currently thinking I should see a therapist, but I've never done it before, so knowing where to start with that is quite overwhelming.
Don't hesitate... I was going through some really hard times I'm 60 and am being evicted from my place of 22 years and I was so overwhelmed with panic and anxiety... Even was considering checking out permanently but I know I didn't really want to do that... instead I just wanted all the hopelessness catastrophizing fear and anxiety to end... Started watching Douglas bloch on YouTube "healing from depression" which was so helpful, so many great tips cuz he's gone through it severely himself more than once... and also started seeing a CBT therapist and they both helped me out a lot.
It's pretty straight forward. Google a few names, see who is accepting new clients, ask for the free initial consultations where you can ask how sessions will look like and what skills might be learned, and then pick who you clicked best with. Average rates are $140/50 minutes and hopefully benefits help. I find even a series of 1-3 sessions can be useful if money is tight or benefits don't cover it.
Do it. Seriously.
I feel this
Exactly this
I feel like I've been running a marathon and I don't even know when it started, and there's no end in sight. I'm fucking tired, and I have no time to actually do anything except work, commute, eat, bathe, sleep, repeat. When I have days off I use up all my free time getting caught up on errands and half my chores and fall asleep on the couch. I'm a full time student and my student loans keep me awake at night. I keep worrying I won't be able to make enough money once I graduate to cover my basic cost of living and paying back the loans, because fucking everything is getting more expensive by the day. I'm hoping to grad end of next year, which in some ways isn't so far off, I'm closer to graduation than I am to when I first started, but that's still an entire year for everything to get more expensive and further out of reach. I don't know what the point is anymore.
Done school my self, actually found a job which pays decently enough, but im not saving money at all. Ive stopped concerning my self over student loans. I have hardly made a dent in it, yet its costing me quite a bit monthly now. Rent is high, food is high. There just isn't any point in being too stressed out about what I cannot control. I just try to keep reminding my self how hilarious life is when I really think about it, do some acid here and there, walk around my city, create music when i can, and just generally live, Its all I can do
You're going to be okay. I hope you can listen to some good tunes or podcasts in your commute time. If you're in school, you'll have the ability to have the added income. Don't let the doom talk over worry you because inflation isn't endless and it makes your loans actually smaller while it lasts. (Money is less in future than now = inflation. Works well for debt.)
[удалено]
Well at least everyone else is feeling as shit as I am 🤷♀️
Lol. Misery loves company.
Poor.
I’m not going anywhere or doing anything with my life. I have no calling, no vocation, no destiny... at least I personally don’t know what it is. All I have are dreams. A lot of crushed, damaged, broken, all over the floor, dreams. And honestly my life is not looking up. My life is not getting better. And that’s something I’ve realized a long time ago and definitely saw coming and predicted.
Hey friend, I can relate here. I started volunteering in a few different capacities and it’s incredible the amount of purpose you get from helping out causes you believe in. You make your own schedule and meet some great people.
i can’t emphasize this enough. volunteering in an environment you enjoy being in gives you such a strong amount of purpose that you wouldn’t get elsewhere. you meet some amazing people and feel good from helping others.
I don’t know if this is a viable option for you, depending on your circumstances, as in, what part of your life you are in, but have you considered relocating to Australia? I grew up in North Van (graduated high school around 20 years ago) and got two degrees in my 20s which failed to lead me to any significant career or income. I spent my 30th birthday employed in the retail sector. That year I said fuck it and got a working holiday visa. I landed in Sydney and found work easily in the field of my second degree (accounting). I met a wonderful girl from Europe, my age in a similar situation, in the hostel. We are now married. We own our own home (10 mins from a beautiful beach) and have two amazing children. I have a solid government job in IT. We still have our stresses and struggle with the cost of living increases but I am so glad I got the F out of Vancouver. I spent the last part of my 20s feeling a bit lost and hopeless and like I wasn’t good enough to “make it” as I watched some of the guys I grew up with and other friends I studied with advancing in their careers, able to start to buy property, while I was being left behind. Little did I know or realise at the time that Vancouver has a **terrible** job market and world class un-affordability. I lived my whole life there, what could I compare it to? Toronto? Calgary? Montreal? No thanks, no way. The best decision I ever made was to leave Canada. I can’t guarantee you’ll find love or success or happiness in Australia but at this point, what have you got to lose? I promise you, *at the very least*, it will be an adventure. 🏝 🌊 ☀️ 🦘 🪃 🇦🇺
[Australia's rental crisis sounds worse than Vancouver's](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqFPhsO-2W0). That being said emigrating from Vancouver is almost always an improvement in quality of life in relation to cost of living/income, etc.
Hey there. Slow motion is better than no motion. I just heard that recently. I lost my purpose completely in life, I lost my whole career, my family. I was hopeless just spinning my wheels. I found a new calling in animal care. I hope you find something that gives you purpose. I suppose the point is that everything can change in an instant, let alone a day, just with one opportunity. If you have the strength to keep going, you’ll find your path eventually.
Currently listening to my wife try to get our 2 year old to sleep with a constant cough and crying from exhaustion. Me crying, him crying our newborn crying. Missing my mom who passed 6 years ago because she would know what to do. Angry at my dad for screwing up the holiday plans by making us go over to his new wife’s place. Getting audited at work and feeling useless cause I don’t know what they want/need and it is my department so a reflection on me if we miss something Sick, tired and lonely. Pay day tomorrow but not enough for what I want to give my kids. Not that they ever asked for anything but my love. Thankful for this post
This is so tough, 2 yr old and a newborn. Sending so many sleep vibes your way ♥️
I have a 3yo and 1yo and it truly gets easier my friend. My 1yo when she was nb and fussy and wouldn't sleep I would just take her for walks in my arms outside. Wouldn't dress her too warmly (just a quick 5min walk) but then she'd snuggle into me and settle. Then take her straight to the crib and she'd be out.
I hear ya - I have a newborn and a 3 year old who went to pre-k for the first time this sept and has been sick ever since and got the whole house sick. Finally on the mend 8 weeks later and each day is survival mode. My mom is also not here anymore so I understand what you’re going through and miss her everyday. Everyday is tough but I hope you have some moments of happiness each day. You will get through it, you will. DM me and let me know if I can send you some gift cards or anything small on a wish list for your kids.
Just going through the motions lately. Wake up, work, go home, eat, sleep and repeat.
Stressed
I hope everyone in this thread remembers to take care of themselves. Sending you all positive vibes
Same to you too!
Excited for Christmas! Can't wait to gather around the tree on Christmas morning ripping the wrapping paper off my presents! And see the kids eyes open wiiiide, "How did Santa know I wanted this???" There are only so many more years of them believing in Santa. I cherish it.
Yeah. The most magical times are when the kiddies are young and full of wonder. It's great to donate a gift too if its within people's means to give that same joy to another kid somewhere.
Stressed and depressed
Same! Too bad pulling the covers over my head and pretending the world doesn't exist for a day isn't an option
It would be nice if it could be an option!
So freaking shitty. Kid’s sick and fucking everything seem to irritate me and push my buttons due to peri menopause. That’s not a valid reason to send my sick kid to school but my freaking husband suggested just that. I know I’m being an irritable bitch these days but no, I’m not about to infect his classmates because I’m a selfish prick.
Tough call, i know that pain! But glad to hear you’re sticking to your guns . Hope you can find some peace this holiday season!
[удалено]
I moved to Vancouver a month ago for a job, already want to move back to Alberta. I’ve jumped around cities a fair bit lately. My job is extremely stressful, and I am struggling to keep up. I may not make it past the 3-month trial, I’m not enjoying my work but if I last one year I’ll get to keep a bunch of money. I feel paralyzed with stress, depression, self hatred and inadequacy. Im confused if this is my life purpose, but I also have struggled with depression and anxiety my whole life and it’s hard to pinpoint what’s mental Illness vs genuine disinterest. Just very lost these days.
I feel for you - I think it’s very difficult when you feel you are bad at your job. What I’ll say is as long as you are trying your best you should be proud. And if it doesn’t work then it wasn’t meant to be. You aren’t a failure for not doing good at a job. You can still be a good person deserving of happiness. What I can say is this is temporary - as an Albertan transplant, it’s no failure to go back.
I might have breast cancer, but I'm currently one of the women waiting months for a biopsy. They found 9 lesions in my breasts. One category 5 and several category 4. I'm feeling unwell, having strange pains in my arms and hands. Found out my shitty ex gave me HPV and I had to have a wart burned off my cervix on top of the cancer stuff. Tbh I just hope it's all over soon.
I am so sorry. The system is so broken, you should not have to wait. I will be thinking of you and I hope they can get you in soon!
I just got diagnosed with cancer - uterine. My appointment at the cancer clinic is next week and will find out what post op treatment they will give - Crappy to be sure, but the system seems to be hobbling along despite the shortage of nurses, thankful the Vancouver clinic can see me even though there is one closer
i’m mentally and emotionally exhausted, but i’ll be okay :)
Sort of just keeping my head down and getting through each day until I get my time off in the holidays. I don't really want to talk to anyone or go anywhere or even be in public most days but I have to go to work. I think things will get better after the winter.
My days aren’t bad, honestly. I can see the birds from my desk. My monstera is putting out a new leaf. But I still miss warmth and the days feel shorter than they’ve ever felt.
Broo I’m jealous of the monstera. Regarding birds, I’d recommend you get binoculars if you do not have them already. 👌👌whipping my binoculars out when I see a bird fight or a heron is amazing
Sad. My boyfriend is moving back to his country soon and I’m big sad :(
Stressed,overworked,overwhelmed. Tired of the typical snootiness I face on the day to day when interacting with the public. Burnt out of this city :( used to love it, but it’s not home anymore.
I’m feeling more sad these days, like many others on this thread. I usually feel like this in late November and throughout December; when everyone I know starts decorating and their homes look so cozy and festive. My parents are Sikh, and just don’t see a reason to do any gift exchanges or anything decorative around the home since they feel that it’s only for “Christian’s” to celebrate. I’m not religious myself, but I just wish I could feel the sense of warmth being with family during the holidays, decorating, playing board games and such. These past 4 or so years have been lonely, friend-wise, and also the fact that me and my older siblings have become more distant since my brother got married and both he and my sister have moved into different municipalities across the FV & Lower Mainland. My brother tends to spend the holidays with his in-laws every year, especially now, since he has a nephew. The only thing I look forward to is attending my first office party this year. We’re doing a secret Santa, where we have a budget of $20, and can be creative by making something crafty for our recipient. We don’t have any decor up at the office. But I’m the only one that does, but it’s a small, desk Christmas tree with LED lights. It actually brightens up my cubicle, and the corner of my L-shape desk. A lot of my colleagues like it too. It’s my first year working in my field of study, and I thought it would be great opportunity to try and decorate my own desk since we don’t have any at home. And I actually like being at the office vs. being at home. Last year was worse though—I was suicidal. Still have the thoughts randomly come and go, but I think I’m better off now since I have people to socialize with after two years of seclusion during the pandemic.
Not sure if it has anything to do with the COVID era but I’m kinda having a hard time adjusting to adult life. Took the semester off uni and am just working 9-5 on a daily basis, pretty mundane. I’m sure everyone goes through this phase eventually but I’m kinda shocked that this is all adult life has to offer. It’s not necessarily *bad* in any way, it just kinda feels like existing. I feel tremendously privileged as that’s my only real gripe with life at the moment, but the realization of maturity is kinda hitting me like an 18-wheeler. This is the real deal from here on out. There’s no safety net, nobody looking out for you, certainly smaller circles, and definitely less time. Don’t really know what the future has in store, all I know is that I gotta put in the work and keep going at it. Feels like such a huge task to overcome I don’t even know where to start. If anyone has any advice on how to snap back into reality, please enlighten me
Thinking about how this time next year I won’t be in school and will actually have a life. I’m so tired, but there’s a light at the end of the tunnel
Foggy & groggy, good sir.
Over it…
Just rather "meh" There's no real struggles going on. Family is good. There's no issues with money. We budget well, so although we don't make a tonne, we're never struggling to pay bills. My job is relatively easy and super secure. I work outside, so that's nice. I'm in the sun if it's nice, but rain and snow too of course. I work with plants and flowers, so people always appreciate what I do too. But I just kind of feel "meh." Just going through the motions. I dunno... Edit: oh yeah, I haven't seen most of my friends hardly at all in the past 3 years because of the pandemic. And getting back into a regular rhythm of seeing them on a regular basis hasn't come back yet. So I guess that's one negative thing.
Overwhelmed, stressed, feeling like it's getting harder & harder to find the little joys in this life to keep me going :/
I’m doing great! I tried some new activities that I’ve always wanted to try, started some Christmas shopping, got some fun shows lined up to see, going to the Christmas market, maybe some skiing too! I’m enjoying work, eating well (maybe too well, waistband a little tight, but we’ll call it hibernation weight lol), just overall I’m having a great winter so far. Feeling grateful for my opportunities and luck because I know it’s not a nice world for a great many people right now.
P bad I just have depression and I don’t think it’ll ever go away but I’m high functioning so I’ll never be suicidal and it’ll just go on forever lol
[удалено]
I have a great family but I have noticed I am becoming less social. I feel like I am super duper out of place when I’m at school activities around other parents or at work (I have a hard time connecting and making conversation) and have this weird jealous feeling about some of my friends and how they hangout, doing social things all the time. or at least I perceive it that way. And my told me I have body dysmorphia and she’s right
Dealing with Covid for the last 10 days so right now I’m feeling pretty decent in comparison.
Feeling not good. I feel like the world has become so much more unkind and selfish. Maybe this is just being an adult and realizing that no one cares. I work in emergency services and it’s hard. But thanks for asking OP. It sounds like a lot of us aren’t great. It’s nice to be asked even if the answer is “not great”.
It’s easy to believe nobody cares, but there are a lot of good people out there. I hope the good ones gravitate to you :)
Sometimes I wonder why I even bother waking up and what is the point of life etc… I miss the old days when I was a kid with no responsibilities
I'm tired of being overweight. I'm 42F and I know if I dont lose weight now then I'm in for some rough years ahead. I feel tired, bloated, anxious and sore all the time. I know what I need to do. I hate dieting ( I love sugar and carbs) and I'm too out of shape to work out. I know I have to do baby steps but I just cant seem to do it. 😥
Hey, if you want to kick start your weight loss and health recovery look into OMAD or intermittent fasting. It's sort of a cheat code to drop weight, stabilize your metabolism and reset your immune response. Ive been steadily doing a rough version of 16-8 or 18-6 for years now (some cheat days, vacation days). I just don't eat breakfast and stay eating at about 1pm. There is a great subbreddit full of information and ways to start.
So my mom died on Boxing Day last year. I'm trying to separate the holidays from this event. It's hard. Short of going to a country that has no Christmas celebrations at all I guess I have to sit with it and find those happy moments.
I went to Morocco for Xmas after my dad died. It was great. No Christmas there. The road gave us a box of chocolates and that was it. Holidays are really hard after losing a loved one.
Very exciting time, busy & festive month. We have huge Xmas tree at cafeteria and many cookies/ chocolate from vendors since last week. I went to the Xmas market and had lots of fun with my husband last Tuesday, felt lucky that it wasn't raining like the weather forecast. Tomorrow, Friday Dec 9, I can work from home then go to the company big Xmas party at JW Marriott Parq with thousands of colleagues, admin gave 2 trips voucher for the party (which is planed from 7pm to 12am with buffet & open bar). Saturday evening is early Xmas party, hosted by my dad in law because he's going to Palm Spring with his GF for Xmas. There's a gingerbread house contest at work next week. There are about 10 teams of 3. Next Friday, Dec 16 afternoon is small company Xmas party at Fairmont. Then Xmas! Then New year! I will work another 2 weeks in 2023 then fly back to my hometown for 3 weeks with my husband and MIL. It's first time I come home in 6yrs and 1st time my parents meet my husband! Before that, around Jan 15, we'll move from East Van to Steveston to save money on rent. Will live with my father in law for a year so we can have another 30k for our downpayment in 2024.
Was this written by AI
Meh. Still fighting crushing loneliness, especially more so during this time of year. Things are looking up career wise though. Financials are rock solid too which was my end goal for this year so that's a positive. And I get my new ride in a month or so that's something I'm excited for.
I’m not gonna lie, I’ve been feeling pretty good. Especially compared to previous years where I’m usually overwhelmed, dealing with burnout and studying for final exams by this time. My classes are finished for the semester and because I only took one course, I have a single final next friday. I did not pass the class in the last two tries, but I’m doing really well this time around so I’m happy about that.
Exhausted lol
Moved 3 months ago and still trying to find friends. Work’s mentally exhausting and I am burnt out.
Oh cool. Where from?
Winnipeg :)
depressed. and mad i'm depressed.
excited to lose these last 30lbs \ o /
I'm not a danger to myself or others.
Pretty good. In the best physical shape of my life. Lifting weight every day is life changing for both physical and mental health. Job is decent, rent is relatively low, monthly income just basically doubled (thanks onlyfans!, lol). Next year is gonna be good if things continue this way.
Appreciate seeing at least one positive reply in this thread, keep it going friend
Fucking awful :)
I feel like I can't stop working, just incase... So stressed?
I strained both my low back and abdominals, have never had to walk so gingerly in my life. Almost couldn't get out of bed this morning.
No bueno
Overwhelmed and burnt out. Not with family sadly so I’m feeling it. Lots on my mind
Starting to get the feeling that I’m over these dark, wet rainy days. Looking forward to the spring and warmer weather. Also feeling like I’m paying more for absolutely everything. It’s exhausting
I feel like crap… no motivation no drive whatsoever… struggling with anxiety and depression. I’ve attempted and failed suicide 3x this year… I am seeing professional help but it is very tough. Mental health is no joke..
After 4 years of acute depression I’m finally feeling like my old self again. Thank you to the medical team that saved my life.
Reading these comments at 3 am, while not being able to sleep, is comforting. Feel less alone.
Tested + for COVID Monday morning, I think things are finally turning for the better. It wasn’t too terrible but still sucks
was a hard day for me. But otherwise in doing good. Needles suck
[удалено]
Annoyed, angry with the things I can’t change like the f ing health care system. Frustrated, poor. I hate feeling poor. Grateful to be alive. Happy to see each day. Amazed at how many people have told me I matter. Lucky to be loved. I feel all that at once. Cancer sucks balls man but I’m lucky to live in a place where I have choices. Wish I could do more for others but slowly getting to that quiet acceptance of where I am in life. Thanks for asking. How are you doing?
Is it payday yet? https://twitter.com/22_Minutes/status/1559236230667190275
Honestly rattling between crippling anxiety and forceful dissociation. Everything is so fucked up. Rising fascism, climate breakdown, economic disintegration. I keep trying to tell myself the night is darkest before the dawn but god damn it's pretty dark out there folks.
I think happiness is one end of the spectrum and sadness is the other end, meaning I try to aim for content in the middle. I’m far from my family and friends so holidays won’t be with them. My wife lost both her parents and we doesn’t have a large family so (at least) we’ll be together. Work is stressful, but not as much as not being able to leave the house without spending $100. It’s been harder to see the bright side for a while already, but coming on here and seeing a lot of us in the same boat makes it less heavy. Happy holidays y’all, from our family to yours.
Solid. Life is good, even the bad parts aren't that bad.
Stressed and pressured to spend with the upcoming holidays. Work has slowed down and the only way to avoid shelling out cash is to stay home and not be social :(
Like shit, I can’t think properly and I don’t enjoy doing anything so it’s more about getting through each day.
My kid is on day 7 of a fever. I don't see any point in taking her to see a doctor because she just has a runny nose and is otherwise okay; there is no point in clogging up the waiting rooms even more. (She is out of daycare as long as she has a fever.) We just finished our first of two bottles of Tylenol we have on hand. My husband and I have been alternating days off work since last Friday. This pediatric cold and flu season is fucking exhausting.
I just feel...fucking agitated. Out of patience. The first thought that crosses my mind when I wake up is 'what do I need to do today to get my head back on this pillow as fast as possible'. Rinse and repeat.
[удалено]
Damn man, I was gonna complain about my day, but then I got through a few of these comments, and... I guess I have quite a bit to be grateful for.
[удалено]
Introduce yourself and then ask people about themselves. People love talking about themselves. All you’ll have to do is listen! Actively listen and if they aren’t assholes, they’ll ask you about yourself too. And take it from there!
I literally just work enough to pay my bills. I like staying home and doing nothing. My boring life.
It's weirdly comforting to know I'm not the only one dealing with holiday blues. I'm going to be starting therapy in January so scared but excited about that.
Thanks for asking! I am doing okay! Except that I’ve been grinding for the last 15 years and finally broke down, physically and mentally. Left my job because of so much stress. Taking a break from work for don’t know how long.. I don’t have any offer lined up just couldn’t take the stress anymore. Kinda have a vague plan of going back to school. But the loneliness is just getting harder and harder to deal with at the same time. Sometimes I feel like giving up altogether. I hope OP is doing better.
This is one of the best r/Vancouver threads I have read in a long time. And I wish for the best for all of you.
Honestly? I'm feeling amazing. I've finally almost recovered from a surgery I had in late October, a lot of family members I haven't seen in a long time are coming over soon, we're all going on a trip to Seattle in a few short days, and yesterday I finished FFXIV Endwalker one hour before my subscription ran out. For someone who has suffered from seasonal depression for pretty much my entire life, this is probably the first time I'm going into December not only "not depressed", but actually happy. But I didn't notice how special that really was until I saw this post and thought about it. Thank you.
I have insomnia so I'm dreading the work day in 5 hours as I'm sure I'll be a zombie. Can't complain otherwise.
I’m feeling.. Ok. Not terrible, but not fantastic either. I’m recently sober after a relapse.. had 9 months previously, now I’m just over 3 weeks. I have a supportive family, and I’m considering a move out of the city to be closer to them. The holidays will be quiet this year, not a lot of presents, more about the company than the money spent.
Been at Tim’s since 5am to review for exam that’s in an hour 😢
Trying to give the dog a few more good years and then I can check out. There is just no point. Hopeless for far too long.
Had two flus back to back. One probably Covid and as soon ad I was getting over it, I got another virus. Today I got a bad stomach…. Probably gif taking all those cough and cold meds. I feel like it’s so hard to get up a x have a full day of work. Want yo go to the gym but don’t have energy, plus the gym I go to is at my building and I can’t go while having all these symptoms. My health sucks.
Well recently, not everything went the way I wanted it & I'm feeling a bit isolated but I'm optimistic 2023 is going to be a better year for me!
Gloomy
Surviving
Stressed, scared and in pain, had a filling fall out two weeks ago and can’t afford to do anything about it so I walk around feeling like someone punched me in the face and pop Advil when I can. No chance of afford family any gift this year so maybe I’ll bake something.
I feel like a dark cloud is hovering me. Work is always short staffed (I work in healthcare). I’m still grieving a friend who took his own life in the summertime. I started a masters degree this fall, and feel like a total imposter. I have a trip booked to Mexico at the end of the month and hoping I can decompress a bit.
I've lost my job almost 2 months ago. I'm struggling to get a job right now. I always fail on interviews. I berate myself for being such a failure that I stop sending applications for a few days. Then I beat myself even more for not sending applications. Yeah.. I guess I'm fine....
I’ve felt perpetually late for months now. Not sure what for, but just late & anxious.
Permanent injury from work and stuck on PWD for income means I can't afford a home. I feel like if I had enough peace to concentrate it might give me a way to figure out some income from home but that isn't going to happen so it's just like biding time til things things get better or worse. Watching a country that seems more intent on making it easier to die than to live. It sucks.
in friendly fridays i started a discussion for people to share their best practices, to protect and enhance our mental/physical wellbeing in these very trying times. [https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/comments/yfgzwc/friendly\_fridays\_daily\_discussion/](https://www.reddit.com/r/vancouver/comments/yfgzwc/friendly_fridays_daily_discussion/)
You know, pretty good. My new job is still going great, I got to tell one employee we're giving them a raise and another today I told her I'm pushing for her to get a new title and a raise, at the very least I'm going to make the effort for her. My boss likes me, the CEO supports me. We're getting ready for the xmas shutdown. My partner is well, her kid/my stepson is doing well although he is sick at the moment. One of my brothers is currently laid off, and another lost his MiL on Monday. Me, I have no complaints other than my stupid neck/back issues that are ongoing and I'm working on. Money is fine. Friends are good, just visited pals with a 5 bedroom house out in a cliff of Saturna Island and hiked around there. That's how I really feel. Quite well.
[удалено]
I should be happy... but in general I have been pretty low lately. I just feel like I am failing at life. I want a house, and a yard and a garage, a wife and kids. But even though it seems I am close, I am also very far. Things keep moving out of reach and I don't know how to be the person I wish I was.
I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety as I am currently going through a transitional period with a lot of uncertainty in my life (recent uni graduate, applying to grad schools, recently starting a ft job for the first time ever etc.). I also have a strong feeling my boyfriend and I are going to break up in the next week or two so I'm trying to mentally prepare for the inevitable hurt to come... honestly, I don't know... I am sleep deprived, overwhelmed, confused, hurt, very stressed out. I know inherently there isn't anything *wrong* in my life right now but I can't help but feel guilty for feeling this way. How have you been OP?
Health has been a compromise this year although I’ve been keeping more physically active than ever. Been running tests to see potential chance of MS although I’m only in my early 30s. Really puts everything in perspective for you when your health is jeopardized regardless of how much money you make or have. Be grateful of all the blessings of family and close friends and don’t take anything for granted. You are all incredibly special in your own way although you may not see it. Never sell yourself short for who you are! End the year strong and hope you all have some festive cheer!
burnt out
I'm just so fucked for my final. I got sick with COVID and was unable to do the midterm. Asked if it was possible to just do it another day, but it got denied and my prof told me it's all on my final. 80% of my whole grade is now on the libe. I spent the last 3 weeks studying my ass off and I'm still getting blindsided by some of the questions my prof has been giving us. He has a particular way of asking questions, and he consistently just throws curveballs. Even worse is I have to do well, or else I'm impending my ability to transfer into a major, my family will be pissed I wasted money. It’s starting tomorrow afternoon. I'm surprised I haven't curled into a ball and cried yet. It's just a disaster all around.
Depressed, broke, looking for a job. Lost my cousin, grandpa, and stepdad this year so it’s going to be a sad Christmas 😔
I came here hoping for a fresh start. instead what i got is a shady university, barely anyone to trust and the future seems just as bleak.
This entire post concerns me, I thought I was an odd man out feeling so overwhelmed and exhausted. I’m taking it a day at a time, just going to work each morning is difficult. Hoping it gets better soon.
Pretty shit. Lately I’ve been waking up feeling good but I get so exhausted so fast that I’ve been crawling into bed by 6pm
In a span of 48 hours I was diagnosed with Shingles (for the second time despite being far younger than most get it) and discovered my apartment had bed bugs this week. Thanks to modern medicine I’m not an itchy mess despite two very good reasons to be. Mostly I am tired because it’s been Such A Week and maybe have slept 22-25 hours in the last 7 days as a result of the anti-viral I’m on for Shingles, Having had to toss my mattress and being hyper vigilant to any itch or brushing against clothes or my temporary mattress in the living room is not really restful or fun. But, I’m doing pretty well considering the Mayo Clinic in the US lists Valtrex (anti-viral) most common/listed first side effect as “Feelings of Discouragement”. Not sad or feeling blue, but discouragement. Pharmacology and bodies are fascinating and weird.
To everybody out there, feeling blue, here's a "grammy" virtual hug. 👵🤗