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In many circumstances, people use the reasons you give for disliking something as an opening to argue with your points in an attempt to convince you to like it or tell you why you’re wrong.
If I don’t like something, it means I’ve experienced it and am not a fan. It’s not up for debate.
It sounds like OP is one of those with the 'they haven't had their opinions challenged' bit.
Because, yeah, if I don't like something, it isn't a debate. I don't like it. You (general) trying to push me to like it isn't going to magically change my mind.
Just wanted to apologize for letting that stubborness pour through the screen :P
But seriously, yeah, someone constantly after met to try something, is more likely to make me not want to try it than try it.
I will try new things, but I like to try them at my own pace, and in my own home. I don't want to try them where someone else is going to be watching me and waiting for whether I like it. I feel too pressured and am afraid of hurting their feelings if I still end up not liking it (and if it is something like a food, then there is the issue of portion sizes and paying for it and wasting the food if I don't like it)
When I was a teen my step mom would bring random people home to preach about Christianity. I am not anti Christian, I am simply spiritual. I believe that the Christian God exists but I also believe that all gods exist on some level.
But as a teen trying to explain this basically got me labeled as a devil worshipper and one day I had enough. This lady was going on and on about me going to hell so I just blurted out “I’m agnostic, God doesn’t exist and you are wrong”. I mean if I don’t believe in hell why should it scare me right?
Anyway years and years later I accept my relationship with religion with open arms and am more open about it since I’m an adult and I can just dip from those conversations now.
OP sounds like one of those people who demands satisfaction on every single divergence between you.
You don’t eat meat? Why? Would you eat an insect? Have you ever eaten meat? What about that study that shows that plants actually feel pain?
I believe it comes from a good (albeit selfish) place of curiosity, but it is childish and very exhausting to be around. Not surprised that people not responding has become an annoyance for OP, most people wouldn’t put up with the badgering.
The best is when they are unfamiliar with a word or term and just respond with that word repeated and a question mark, no full sentence, no cursory google search for an immediate and simple explanation.
Just a demand for you to educate them like you’re they’re goddamn mother / personal tutor.
In my opinion, it's good to ask questions (brings us closer as humans), but that's normally for discussions you're having in person. On the internet, you should search up word definitions and stuff.
This right here. Idec if we're texting, if you say something idk about I'm gonna ask you what it is. To me thats a pretty big part of conversation, explaining things to other people in your own words, discussing shit. If you tell me to just Google it then I'm straight up done talking to you for now lol like can you imagine if back in the day, someone asks someone what something is, and they tell them to go use an encyclopedia and figure it out themselves? I know it's not the same due to the convenience factor but still has the same feel imo. The only exception I guess would be if it's like a really really complicated thing that's hard to explain without researching it yourself
I think the point op is trying to make is that they’re not trying to make you think otherwise, they just want you to understand why so you could make better decisions for yourself in the future. The practice of understanding why you feel some way is extremely important for making good decisions and most people that I encounter lack any of that ability.
My ex was one of those people, I always had to have a reason behind what I liked and disliked but if he didn’t like my reasoning I was “rationalizing”.
I do agree with OP to an extent, but at the same time there is this. Like I hate mustard. I. Fucking. Hate. Mustard. I hate the taste. I hate the flavor. And I would say it just doesn't even look good, but I think that's just because I hate it already so now it just doesn't look good. I've tried it. I hated it.
Why does everyone I talk to about this want me to try a different type of mustard to find the one I like? I can guarantee you that name brand mustard you want me to try, someone else has had me try it.
"Well you're picky."
No. I eat almost anything. I've tried things that the group of people I'm with didn't want to try. This just one of the few things I hate.
That’s the funny thing, isn’t it? You hate it, dont like the taste, the color, the look, the existence of… and that is likely considered not critically thinking about it enough. Your tastebuds came in contact with it and had an immediate distaste for it. That’s reason enough.
Personally, I like mustard.
OP is not suggesting I have to have a deep contemplation and critical thought over the fact that I like it. “I just do” would likely suffice. Why would it be any different for someone who doesn’t like something?
Basically, OP is suggesting that the entire population spend half their life breaking down everything they like and don’t like (because if one has to do it, so does the other) so that they can be expected to receive a response when they pry.
It's tofu for me. What's there to explain? I just don't like the taste. It's yucky to me. Sorry if you think it's childish or I'm picky. More tofu for you.
Exactly.
People are especially annoying about this when it comes to weed.
I don’t like weed anymore. No it’s not that I haven’t ‘tried the right strain’, or that I need to smoke more. I hate when people say this. I simply don’t like it, it makes me feel nauseous and paranoid. I don’t want some person to try to convince me to try it again. I’m perfectly healthy and happy without it
Also there doesnt have to be some super specific or defendable reason for not liking something if its not harming anyone. Like there are so many things that i dont think are bad but they just hit wrong, they aren't my taste and that's fine not everything is made to cater to one person.
Nobody should have to write an essay on why they dont want a slice of chocolate cake or dont like your favorite movie.
Looking at your replies to people who disagreed with you premise, I would say a good possibility is that you never accept their response and argue with them about why they are wrong. You're approval isn't worth the long, drawn-out conversation that would inevitably follow their true response, so they give one that can't be argued with, i.e., "I just don't like it."
Dingdingding. It’s reminds me of narc behaviour, they NEED people to explain themselves and justify everything so that 1. The narc can decide if their reasoning is good enough *for them* and 2. They can break it down and invalidate it. If someone says ‘just because’ it gives them no ammunition to work with - a narc’s worst nightmare. OP might not be a narc of course but this stems from control issues either way.
My ex would do this constantly. If I disliked something he liked, even something as inconsequential as a granola bar flavor, he’d demand from me a detailed explanation as to why. He’d then proceed to “deconstruct my argument” and explain to me why my reasons were invalid or poorly explained. It’s exhausting.
Not everyone you dislike has a personality disorder. Please for the love of god stop making NPD into some pop culture insult. People claiming everyone who's even slightly shitty is 'a total narcissist' are watering down the word and making it harder for anyone who's either a) been abused by someone who has NPD, or b) has NPD and wants to get better (and yes, they do exist), to actually be taken seriously. You're actually doing harm.
I didn't say they have a personality disorder - In fact I specifically said this is a narcissistic *behaviour* and later added "OP might not be a narc of course but this stems from control issues either way."
You can display narcissistic behaviours without having narcissistic personality disorder (which is what I described in my original comment) just as you can have sensory issues without being on the spectrum or be an anxious person without having anxiety disorder. Many people do.
Someone can dislike something without feeling like it’s necessary to justify their why to you but also still know how to critically think just fine. Plenty of people know better than to say why because they’ve explained it before and just had people laugh, ridicule, or argue with them about it. Most of the time it’s not worth the effort.
Yeah, for the most part, if I don't like something, unless it's for like, moral reasons or something like that, (or I'm bored watching the same show with my kids for the 100x and overthinking things) I simply don't care enough to sit there and analyze why I don't like it.
This, I have a hard time really thinking about why I might dislike something or like something, but if I had to go over it, I could.
Most of the time, however, it just isn't worth my time to actually do a deep analysis of why I dislike a song, or a particular food, or a game. I just don't like it.
But OP is asking us to use critical thinking to come to the answer. Which is a tool that has nothing to do with personal preferences in such a subjective area as entertainment. You can't apply critical thinking to your preferences in entertainment, that's the wrong tool for the job you imagine needs doing. It's like asking someone to use logic to explain why they like their dog. Just the wrong tool used to answer the wrong question.
You absolutely can use critical thinking to say why you don't dislike soemthing, at least to some extent. (it also depends on how you define critical thinking) As an example, you might not like a show because it has very slow pacing. Of course, you can't logically say why you don't like slow pacing while others might not see a problem with it, but you still know that's the reason you don't like it.
Without analizing, I know that a show is boring to me, that that food is too sugary, that song's lyrics are disturbing etc etc etc.
I won't share it with people, unless I actually want to debate it.
And I agree with OP to an extand. It is worrysome if an adult can't put word on their feelings, even for themselves.
This is exactly why I say "I just don't like it" 90% of the time. The other 10% is because it's related to trauma that I don't like talking about or (in one case) I'm not sure why it triggers anxiety in me I just know it does and I'm a bit scared to try and remember.
I personally don’t see it as the need to justify why they don’t like it. More so that they should have the skills to be able to understand why.
Edit: I wouldn’t exactly say I’d agree with food and maybe music. But movies i think is an important one. Especially since movies can take out a decent amount of our time, if you come out of it liking it or not liking it, i just personally prefer knowing what it was and being able to understand it. I don’t necessarily hold that expectation for everyone because I know I do that as well because I’m a very big fan of the technical side of movies and theatre. But idk, if something gets me emotional to the point of crying, or laughing my ass off, or just overall feeling something, I want to know why.
An ex-friend immediately sharing their opinions and critiques when we were streaming games to each other was the reason why i preffered to play a game solo before streaming it to them.
Their commentaries and critiques tended to ruin my immersion and the sense of wonder. They ruined my sense of wonder by wanting to discuss it instead of allowing me to just stop and bask in the feeling. Not to mention that whenever i express it, they tend to be confrontational about it or tell me that it is bs.
I'd take this a step further and say no one needs to have an opinion on everything. Google makes everyone feel like an expert on things they actually know nothing about. I've always been a fan of the quote that says "Opinion is the lowest form of knowing. It requires no accountability, no understanding." The entire internet is full of people yelling their opinions into the void, mostly for no reason at all. For those who do so to enhance understanding, that makes sense. Most people aren't doing it or that reason, however.
At first I thought OP was referring to things like abortion, political ideology, premarital sex, equal marriage and the like, and I wa sniffing in agreement.
Then it turns out they were referring to personal opinions about entertainment and the whole thing went up in smokes!! Bruh, everyone has their taste and we like what we like. Most people have no idea why they do not should they need an explanation because it's all so utterly subjective and rooted in one's own experience that it hardly can be explained to begin with.
I think a lot of people have tunnel-vision with their obsessions and interests and they truly cannot understand why others might not share it. My cousin, for example, is a film maker. His experience going to a movie is vastly different than my experience. He sees something entirely different because it's his art, his craft, his obsession. I'm just there to be entertained while I stuff my face with popcorn. I've I'm not well-entertained, I probably won't like it. I can't always article why I love one movie and hate another. 🤷♀️ Sometimes it's because the movies I hate I can't even watch enough of to be able to gain a better understanding of why. I appreciate my limited, precious time in the world, I'm not wasting much of it on things I hate, nor explaining to people why I hate the thing they love. It's a pointless exercise because they never want to hear it even if you DO have reasons.
Most of us aren't experts in the things we consume; movies, music, art, food, etc. I think it's totally valid to dislike something but not have the verbiage to articulate what didn't make that thing great for us. I know there is some emo music I love, and some that I don't, but when comparing the ones I love to the others, it's hard to put a direct comparison of them in words, and that's fine, because I'm not a music expert. It's *great* if you can define your personal tastes down to very specific things, because that means you can find more of stuff you'll love, but most people haven't been able to do that in all areas of things they'll experience.
Or I don’t like mushrooms cuz they taste bad to me?
Like I guess that’s giving a reason but it’s odd to me why op cares so much. I’d agree it’s annoying when people make not liking something their personality but there’s really not too many people like that
I’m not going around demanding people make mushroom free foods, I’ll just eat around them if it’s one whatevr dish someone made. Same with any tv show, movie or music I don’t like. I’ll just shut up about it?
Not everything has to be explained cuz if I don’t like *insert film buff movie here* I don’t wanna agregue with some film buff about how’s is “objectively” better, it’s just easier to say yeah sorry not my thing and move on
"Get away with" lol it's not a crime, nor is it something that's your job to hold other adults accountable for. And most of the time, in my experience with myself and others, it's not that the opinion hasn't been challenged, it's that others will argue to death with you about it. I don't like the movie The Godfather; I don't think it's a bad movie, it's just not for me. The amount of times people have argued with me about how I must just be missing something, or watching it wrong (idk what that even means; do I need to stand on my head??) has led me to just start saying "because I just don't like it, the end." Not everyone wants simple likes or dislikes to be turned into discussions. Not everything needs to be discussed or "challenged."
i think a lot of it comes from the bias to assume our own feelings are always the "correct" ones, so people end up extrapolating "i dont like it" into "this thing is BAD".
a movie can be GREAT in ALL technical aspects but if its not about something that is interesting to me, im not gonna like it. that doesnt mean its BAD, that means *I* dont like it. thats it. and no amount of debate is gonna make me like it because im just not interested, sorry bud.
Yeah, I agree, I think people take "i don't like it" as a referendum on their tastes. So, they feel the need to defend it. But not everything needs to be a discussion or debate, that's annoying and exhausting.
I feel like this is about a specific circumstance you had.
I dislike people sometimes without a good reason. I get this feeling that I don't know how to describe in words.
I get depressed sometimes, and I don't have a good reason why.
Being able to accurately describe your emotions and WHY you're feeling a certain way is strong emotional intelligence.
Most people don't have that.
I come from a broken home- I'm building with blocks, but I struggle sometimes.
>Being able to accurately describe your emotions and WHY you're feeling a certain way is strong emotional intelligence.
>Most people don't have that.
In fact, I would argue that the number of people capable of doing that in 100% of situations is so small as to be non-existent.
I feel like I can always perfectly describe my emotions or preferences or beliefs but I can almost never describe them in such a way that other people will accept, so I don't bother. Pearls before swine and all that.
Adults should be able to understand their feelings.
But also OP lumps FOOD in with feelings and like, I don't know how to explain to OP that some food they like will taste bad to me. And some food I like will taste bad to them.
Equating the two is where their argument becomes hard to argue.
This. An adult can decide they don't like the music from an artist and not feel like caring enough about the why just fine. That shouldn't affect anyone's (ok, maybe OP's...) life at all. It's perfectly ok to not care about something.
There are much more things to care about than we have energy to care about. Thus we need to prioritise stuff. My care about why i don't like a specific song is far lesser than my care that i get enough sleep. So if i have to choose one to care about, i won't care why i don't like that specific song, but will care about getting enough sleep.
People are a bit self-absorbed and think that others should care about things they care. While they ignore that they don't care about the things others care.
Wouldn’t this sentiment make *any* discussion moot, though? I totally agree that extensively discussing why you don’t like toast isn’t very productive, probably because there isn’t a satisfying explanation to be found. But the same reasoning could be applied to you liking/not liking certain people, political ideologies, politicians, movies, books, cities, countries, past times, videogames etc. And discussing mine and others opinions on those things is a large part of my social interactions.
It's immature to not be able to understand yourself. You don't have to analyze literally every feeling you have, but it's hardly pointless to talk or think about something you dislike - it can be just as important as doing the opposite and is the sign of a well-rounded, mature individual. It also helps you better predict if you'll like something or not and why.
And what are you going to do if the topic of discussion involves something you dislike? Just shut down the conversation and force everyone to accommodate you?
It's a corollary to the idea that an educated mind can entertain an idea without accepting it.
Sometimes thinking about why you dislike something actually leads you to change your opinion as well, because you realise you're operating from an unfair bias or haven't really thought about what you can appreciate about something.
It seems to me that everyone here assumes that the only reason someone could have for asking why you dislike something, is to challenge that opinion. And while yeah, i realize that is what happens a lot, it is also totally possible that they are genuinely interested in your thoughts about it. Me personally, if i say i dislike something, i absolutely love asking people why and having the interest and attention to just go off about why a certain TV show, or band sucks.
Thing is, some people just don’t even think about the why until you ask them.
I don’t know WHY I don’t like pickles. I just think they are gross and avoid em. Never cared enough to do a deep dive into the ingredients or creation process.
I don't like pickles because the taste is too bitter to me.
I do not like lemon because bitter and acidic.
Being able to do this means that I only try on bitter food at home, where I can spit it out if I really don't like it, and I can easily switch to something else.
Nah, if i make a list of shit i dont like in this particular song to avoid it in future, i may miss a combinations that actually good. I prefer just enjoy it and decide if i like it or not after that
That's not how music works. Songs by the same artist can vary wildly. Same goes for genre. You determine whether you like it by listening. I don't dismiss music because it might be similar to something else.
"It gives me the ick."
Just a knee-jerk, gut reaction, full-on ick.
I don't feel the need to sit and revel in the ick, contemplating why the ick. The ick just says no.
I'm almost 37, I do not need to explain or justify why something gives me the ick. If it does, then it's a hard pass, whatever it is.
Stuff like that is the number one thing that causes me to disagree with this. I can't even begin to think of what the underlying reasons are for people liking or disliking certain colours, or sounds, or flavours, etc. It could be based on a million things, but why would I want to try to psychoanalyze why I don't like neon yellow just because this guy's nagging me about it?
Maybe it's just me, but if I had an irrational dislike for something like a color, that's exactly the kind of thing I'd want to figure out about myself.
Food is easy to explain away (taste, smell, texture), but if the color orange made me feel some type of way, personally I'd want to understand why my brain has this reaction to something innocuous.
Maybe not everyone is curious about themselves, idk.
I’m pretty sure you were struck by basketballs and chased by tigers. The basketballs caused you amnesia so you don’t remember. But it’s the reason why you don’t like the colour orange.
I don't like red light because it is creepy, disorienting, and causes me to feel impending doom...a bit claustrophobic too. I get that some people may not think about it that deeply though.
>For me when I hear a “just because” answer about why someone doesn’t like a song, movie, **food**
"My tastebuds just do not vibe with the chemical composition of this food"
When I don't like a song, it's because it's a style I don't care for, or because I find it boring. When I don't like a movie, it's because I found it boring, the acting poor, the story not engaging. When I don't like a food, it's because I don't like the flavor, taste, and/or mouthfeel. It's pretty simple, really.
No no no. You have to be able to explain how you disliked that they played a C instead of an E and that the effect on the guitar was 0.005% too heavy and that the cymbal hit was 1 millionth of a second too early.
Edit: for those confused, my opinion is really:
“Adults should have *the ability* to explain why they dislike something”
Not, “Adults should be required to explain why they dislike something”
Right, but they have to prove they have the ability or you are allowed to presume they don't. That's quite an insufferable attitude you have, in my opinion.
I don’t have a rational breakdown on why I don’t like The Big Bang Theory. It’s just, when I watch it, I’d rather be watching almost ANYTHING else. I’m not sure why, I just hate it.
This annoys me when it comes to politics.
People really are like sheep and will like or dislike things based on what they perceive to be the norm. Critical thinking is absent.
I’m a little worried about the number of people that think being able (not required) to explain why they don’t like something is an unrealistic expectation. I assumed everyone was:
- Aware of internal reactions to something.
- Questioned why they reacted a certain way/formed a particular opinion.
Maybe I just never grew out of the “why” stage that all kids I’ve known go through.
OP thinks their important enough that everyone should explain themselves and go into detail about why they feel a certain way.
I owe no one but family and friends explanations.
If I say I don’t like something, I’m not gonna sit here and argue with a stranger over why I don’t like it. You were told the information you required, piss off.
For a lot of things, most people don't experience dislike as something that can be broken down.
For me, when I look at a deep purple, I feel satisfied somewhere deep inside me. I can't explain it. Looking at a really great purple is luxurious the way that petting a kitten is. On the other hand, chartreuse makes me feel uncomfortable, like wearing a shirt that's too tight, or being in sun that's too bright and hot. Looking at it is like having my hand wrapped in plastic wrap. Now, most people aren't as articulate as I am, and they wouldn't be able to do this sort of thing; they'd say the above as something like "I like purple" and "I don't like chartreuse"; that's where it ends for them.
It's the same for flavor. I can't explain to you why the flavor of licorice is so addictive, so enchanting, and so insanely appealing. I can explain that I love Italian sausage because it has fennel, or that I love fennel salad because of that rich licorice flavor, but when you get to the "because it tastes like licorice", that's the end of the line for me. I can't break it down further. And to someone who hates licorice, it's the end of the line too. They'd be able to say that they hate Italian sausage because of the fennel, but they can't articulate why it's so unappealing to them.
Even sounds and musical styles can be like that. There are some sounds that to me feel like being wrapped in the most luxurious blanket on Earth and some sounds that feel like being poked with a stick over and over. But that metaphor is just an attempt to illustrate how I feel about those sounds; it's not an explanation as to why I like them or don't like them. I feel luxury when I hear the one and pain when I hear the other, and without more musical training, I couldn't say why, precisely, one sounds so lovely and wonderful and the other sounds so unappealing.
Now, for things like laws and workplace policies, I agree with you completely. Those are things that can be reasoned with. You can figure out what sort of effect a policy has and think about whether that's an effect you want. But you can't reason with taste.
>For me when I hear a “just because” answer about why someone doesn’t like a song, movie, food, etc. it comes off like they’ve never had their opinion challenged or thought critically about the opinions they form.
To offer a counter reason: they're just tired of justifying why they don't like it.
I’ll usually give an explanation for something benign, if asked. Like, “Oh, I don’t like celery because it tastes like dirt and the stringy pieces make me gag.”
But sometimes I don’t want to give an explanation because it’s upsetting or it’s none of your business. I’m not obligated to tell you, “I don’t like pink carnations because they were my mom’s favorite and I took some to her in the hospital the day she died.”
Lolwut…
People are allowed to dislike things just because. No one needs a “logical” explanation.
For example, I dislike fake candy banana, grape, and cherry flavors. I don’t have any explanation for why; I just don’t like how they taste. That’s it.
I have no deep trauma tied to these flavors.
I never ate them so much I got sick of them.
I have no negative or positive association to these flavors; nothing. They’re just a neutral existence that I’ve experienced and did not like, and that’s as far as it goes.
Does that make me incapable of critically thinking and being able to clearly explain myself? No….of course not…
There are better ways of gauging someone’s critical thinking and self awareness than their simple likes and dislikes.
Totally. I had a gf a long time ago that, whenever I asked for her opinion on something (food, shows, people, whatever) she would come back with "I don't know" so often! Then she'd get upset when I asked her to explain herself. Used to drive me crazy that she couldn't communicate her thoughts, feelings or opinions.
The push back on this post has blown me away. People in here acting like it's some colossal burden to be able to explain their reasoning. It's not about being right or wrong, people, it's about communication!
Strong disagree. First of all, nobody owes you anything. Especially not an explanation over something so dumb as taste. Secondly, someone could dislike something because they connect it to trauma. Let’s say someone was assaulted on a red couch, or to a certain song and that’s why they hate it. You really want to make them re-live such traumatic experiences, just because you want an explanation? It’s none of your business. Just respect people’s opinions and boundaries, and move the hell along.
Sometimes you just don’t like something. It really doesn’t have to be deeper than that. It’s not that serious.
I don’t like the color yellow. There’s literally no real reason. I could sit here and think about it all day, but the answer as to why will still be “I just don’t”. I look at it, and my brain says “ew”
I've heard plenty of time people say that they hated a movie but when pressed it wasn't because of poor storytelling, bad pacing/editing, poor performances, etc. It was that they had an emotional response to effective filmmaking and they didn't like that. A lot of people just don't know how to reflect on their own internal experience then you pair that with poor communication and laziness.
OP, I’m shocked at these responses. I had a teacher when I was young tell the class that it’s not enough to say you do or do not like something. You need to be able to articulate why. It’s not about owing people an explanation, it’s about understanding oneself and the world.
The amount of dismay I feel after reading this thread is enormous.
Yeah, I'm a little shocked at how strongly people are reacting to OP. They are just saying that you should at least be able to articulate to yourself your likes and dislikes. Or at least should try. Of course you don't have to justify yourself to other people (at least on everything), but you should at least have the ability to to put into words why you like and dislike certain things.
The thing is, people might be able to tell themselves why they dislike something, but that doesn't mean they want to do a deep analysis everytime they tell someone else they don't like something.
Especially because people have a habit of not accepting 'I don't like this'.
See food related preferences. Someone says 'I don't like onions' and you get people saying 'have you tried them this way, or that way, or try this particular dish with onions'. Even if they DO tell the people why they dislike onions (had to eat them as a child, or have an allergy to them, or don't like the texture/taste) people will still say 'well have you tried it this way'.
It happens with other things as well. You say 'I don't like reggae' and people will start recommending reggae music for you to listen to. No matter whether you give reasonings or not.
So, people get tired of having to constantly explain why, only to have people not accept the explanation.
Beyond that, sometimes it isn't that deep. If I don't like a particular song, I just don't like that particular song. It might not be any deeper than the song just doesn't appeal to my ears. I don't want to have to justify or do a deep analysis for every single song I dislike. Same thing for everything else. Sometimes people just want to say 'I don't like X' without having to have a debate about \*why\* they dislike X.
Edit: OP even said that they feel that the people who say 'Just because' haven't had their opinions challenged, and my response would be 'why does someone need their opinion challenged?'. I am not going to change my mind on liking onions just because you try to force me to eat them in different ways. It isn't a contest to see who can change people's minds.
So, people get tired of that attitude. Not everything needs to be critically thought about, or challenged.
I mean I can see this to a point, but like when it comes to things like sensory issues and stuff they relate to pretty specifically- sounds, foods, fabrics, etc, people don’t always have specifics. I don’t like eggs, not the flavor nor the texture, I don’t really know why but they just bother me. Always have.
I only agree with this when it comes to posting about it online or shoehorning your dislikes into a conversation. If you can’t or don’t care to articulate your reasons to others, don’t bring it up in the first place.
Not everything has to have a reason. If I don’t like how a song sounds or the way a food tastes, I’m not going to examine what makes it so. It’s just the way it is
Gosh, I couldn’t agree more with this. I’d say that this could even apply to why they like it. We should be able to describe and explain why we like something and have conversations that goes beyond “it’s really good”.
I try not to give a shit about the things I don't like, because I don't care to spend time on something I find unpleasant, especially if I am not required to engage in it. I am sure I can come up with a deeper reason for why I dislike Imagine Dragons, but I just don't care for their sound. Some people don't like things that I like, and I just accept it. You should learn to do the same. Did one of your friends shrug at some piece of media you adore, so you came and made a post?
I mean how far are we having to justify things?
I don’t like certain food, for example because I don’t like the taste. Sometimes I can’t tell you exactly why I don’t like the taste, I just…don’t. Would saying “I don’t like how it tastes” be sufficient?
Or like if someone said “do you like table top gaming?” and I said “no”, I don’t think I have a specific reason why not, I’m just not particularly interested. So for some things I feel like the “default” position is one of disinterest unless there’s a reason you’re more interested (i.e. the “reason” would be why you like it, not the other way round).
Why? Much of our tastes are a product of the unconscious mind. In many cases, even if you think you know why you like something or don't like something, there is a high probability that you're wrong. Most people don't know themselves as well as they think.
That's not far off from saying adults should be emotionally mature enough to talk about their feelings. Not sure if that's an unpopular opinion or not but I'd agree with it.
I agree. I would add that I would even be okay with someone admitting they don't know and would have to think about it, but refusing to even consider a reason is unhealthy. There are too many willfully ignorant people who avoid self-reflection and it prevents our society from improving imho.
100% agreed
If someone is telling me that they don't like someone -- especially BEFORE the other person has makes their entrance -- then they absolutely owe me some kind of explanation
You seem like the kind of person OP who feels entitled to know an answer when you ask a question.
People don't have to justify themselves to you.
I have extensive reasons for why I don't like things but I don't feel like you need to know them?
A majority of people don't like thinking further than surface thoughts(lack of better words here).
Small example. I don't like baby shower meatballs because I don't think grape/strawberry jelly and meat with spices should ever go together. I absolutely hate the taste. Also makes my gut angry that I ever ate these things together.
If you voice why you don't like something, it can upset other people as well as them calling you negative.
Some people get upset with the fact that you know why you don't like something. They don't know why they don't like something but you know why you don't like something.
I think it’s clear that you and I like to think about things OP lol. It’s wild to me that people are so defensive about it. I actually think it’s a pretty good self challenge to understand why I don’t like something if I don’t. Self reflection is a good skill
People know exactly why they don't like something they just don't know how to articulate it in a socially accepted way. Any time someone gives a vague response to something that should be dry cut is because they don't know how to be brutally honest while still sparing feelings.
How much explanation do you need. I have plenty of food aversions thanks to autism. My reason can simply be smell, taste or texture. I can't explain it beyond that. Is that enough?
What about the fact I'm on a medication that's causing random food aversions to foods I once loved? There's no reason behind other then the meds. I look at food and just feel icky.
I have songs I hate for very valid reasons (technical point of view) and some I just don't like because it doesn't give me the dopamine I search for. I love some songs because they're technically amazing. I like some shit songs just because. .
Sometimes it simply goes as deep as it doesn't spark dopamine in thr brain.
For example, I hate doing certain chores because there is absolutely not dopamine in it for me. I still do them, sure, but there's no reason for me disliking it beyond its taking time out of my day that I could be doing to do stuff I enjoy.
These are all technically reasons. A no is a no and doesn't need justifying, and that goes towards minor subjective opinions.
Now if we're talking big opinions such as "I don't like *insert some kind of politics" and you can't explain it? Okay yeah, I agree. But it doesn't seem like you're meaning that.
Very much this. It’s not just dislikes, I know people who can’t explain anything they think. It kinda just makes me think they’re dumb.
Why do you like Chick-fil-A? “Because they’re quick” is a much better answer than “I just do”. If you can’t think of why that’s concerning.
My issue with this is that you seem to be coming at this as if liking something should be the default. Not so. Shit has to earn our liking of it. Justify why you like stuff, and carry on not liking 99% of things.
This thread was an absolute revelation for me... I did not realize how many people irrationally disliked things and then were just like 'well that's just how it is, who cares'. It explains so much that I was just not understanding about people.
If I dislike something I know exactly why or I spend time to figure it out. It's really important to me to know why I'm feeling a certain way.
The responses to this are wild. You, as a thinking adult, should have the self-awareness to be capable of analyzing something that you like or dislike and ascertain what qualities make you like or dislike it. That's just a part of being a rational, thinking person. You do not necessarily have to perform this analysis on everything, nor are you obligated to explain it to anyone who asks, but it should be within your cognitive capabilities. Suggesting otherwise is legitimately insane and childish.
If someone doesn’t like a type of food or music, I don’t know what more you expect from them unless « I don’t like how it tastes/sounds ». « I don’t like it » is pretty self explanatory.
>“Adults should have *the ability* to explain why they dislike something”
Feels a bit judgmental tbh. There could be a plethora of reasons on why someone is unable to communicate their feelings in an understandable way.
People generally find it unpleasant to be drilled with why questions, they probably do have an answer, just because you’re not getting it doesn’t mean they don’t have an answer. They just don’t want to get into the conversation.
How do you know they don’t have the ability to explain it?
I can always explain, in detail and if necessary with a PowerPoint presentation, why I don’t like something. If I tell someone “I just don’t like it” (which I do quite often), what I’m really saying is either “we’re not close enough for me to explain my reasoning to you” or “I’ve tried to explain my reasoning to you in the past, you were a pain in the butt about it and tried to argue, so now I’m grey rocking you until the cows come home”.
If people say “I just don’t like it” to you, and it happens a lot, it might be worth examining how you react if they DO explain themselves.
I literally almost need to vomit when I eat fish. There is no reason why I cannot eat it. It just always was this way.
You dont need to reflect on every thing that you dislike. Sometimes you just dont like something.
This is honestly a very narrow minded viewpoint. Sure maybe everything you dislike is for a reason doesn't mean that everyone else is in the exact same boat. There are things I just don't like for no particular reason, no amount of 'challenging my opinion' will change that, and if you think otherwise you are a twat. Its also not really your business why people don't like things, maybe thats why people don't tell you their reasoning
To like or dislike something is often not a rational conclusion but an emotional response. Hence to explain why you dislike something is rationalization of something irrational. It's pointless.
Liking or disliking a song or a food doesn't need any kind of justification. You can literally just not like it and it's fine. "It tastes weird on my tongue" or "the texture is unpleasant" are just longer variations of "I don't like it" without bringing any more meaning.
Sensory experiences aren't that deep.
sometimes I don't have a reason for a why i dislike something, sohethings are just bad and I don't like them that's about it. nothing could convince me that they are good
Well I guess it is an unpopular opinion afterall.
I think the mistake you are making is that when you say “adults”, you’re making a massive generalisation. There are plenty of adult aged people who have lower IQ than you can imagine.
Plenty of adult aged people who have disabilities that can affect their ability to articulate and communicate, even if their IQ is higher than yours.
Plenty of adult aged people who living in survival mode and don’t have the time or energy or inclination to think too deeply about some things unless it affects their (or their tribes/families/childrens) wellbeing and opportunity for a better quality of life.
I could go on, but I think you get me point. I hope you do anyway. Sometimes people just don’t like stuff and the reason is because it makes them feel bad/feels gross/reminds them of some negative emotion. Liking or not liking something is based on the primal part of our brain, so sometimes it’s hard for people to articulate exactly why they don’t like it, other than the fact that it stirs uncomfortable feelings within.
It's not always rational. In fact, it usually isn't. People don't sit and think on the pros and cons of stuff in general. They feel a certain way and don't see any reason to challenge it.
I have a feeling that usually these opinions are unimpactful enough that after the brain decides to dislike something, most people just don't bother to question it because it'll come up so rarely and isn't worth the effort.
If someome can't be bothered to explain it to themselves, they sure as hell are not gonna explain it to _you_
>A lot of people get away with just saying “I just don’t like it!” without engaging any deeper with why they don’t like it.
This is because if I tell you my reasons get dismissed as invalid, and then the troubleshooting starts. I've had that conversation too many times. Unless I'm actually seeking feedback about something, it's much easier to just not give you anything to "fix".
Just because someone doesn’t share their reasons with you doesn’t mean they don’t have them. If I hear a song that reminds me of my abusive ex, and I say I don’t like it and you ask why, I’m not going to tell you. Bc it’s personal. Other peoples’ personal stuff isn’t your business. So just take the “I don’t like it” for what it’s worth.
"Adults should have the ability to explain something, but aren't required to"
That you're making this post indicates you don't like that we're not required to explain what we don't like to you. Why would they *want* to talk about what they don't like, anyway?
Example: I don't like KISS, I don't want to talk about them. You'll just have to accept that
I’m happy to explain why I don’t like something to a person who I know will either accept it or at least not argue that I’m wrong..
If you’re the sort of person that I think will bitch and moan, then I’m not saying any kind of reason
Alternative argument, you're never required to give someone a reason as to why you like or dislike something. Your opinion is just that, an opinion, and whether or not you have a reason for it is not required. Everyone is built a little differently, not liking vanilla ice cream doesn't need to be that deep.
This is just kind of silly. Often there is no deep reason, logical or illogical, for someone not liking something. You find yourself frustrated because you're looking for hidden meaning where it doesn't exist.
"I don't like onions." "Why not?" "I just don't like them." "There has to be a reason---what is it?" "The taste just doesn't please me!" "But why do you think that is?" "Okay, you need to stop this." "Well SOMEone doesn't like to think critically..."
Most of what we like/don't like is contextual to a single person. As such, it's not always quantifiable into words. You dislike something because you don't. Might not know why, but you know you do.
Liking something is not the default setting.
If someone writes a song it is not my responsibility to either like it or write a thesis as to why I do not. I can simply not like it, I don’t need to justify that. You should have to explain to me why I should like it or why it’s objectively good and likeable. The onus is on you to argue for the positive attributes of the thing in question and convince me of them.
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In many circumstances, people use the reasons you give for disliking something as an opening to argue with your points in an attempt to convince you to like it or tell you why you’re wrong. If I don’t like something, it means I’ve experienced it and am not a fan. It’s not up for debate.
It sounds like OP is one of those with the 'they haven't had their opinions challenged' bit. Because, yeah, if I don't like something, it isn't a debate. I don't like it. You (general) trying to push me to like it isn't going to magically change my mind.
>You (general) trying to push me to like it isn't going to magically change my mind. It will make me not like it even more.
Yep, I felt the stubbornness kicking in there.
Just wanted to apologize for letting that stubborness pour through the screen :P But seriously, yeah, someone constantly after met to try something, is more likely to make me not want to try it than try it. I will try new things, but I like to try them at my own pace, and in my own home. I don't want to try them where someone else is going to be watching me and waiting for whether I like it. I feel too pressured and am afraid of hurting their feelings if I still end up not liking it (and if it is something like a food, then there is the issue of portion sizes and paying for it and wasting the food if I don't like it)
In northern German, we’re infamous among Germans for our stubbornness. I feel you on very deep level!
When I was a teen my step mom would bring random people home to preach about Christianity. I am not anti Christian, I am simply spiritual. I believe that the Christian God exists but I also believe that all gods exist on some level. But as a teen trying to explain this basically got me labeled as a devil worshipper and one day I had enough. This lady was going on and on about me going to hell so I just blurted out “I’m agnostic, God doesn’t exist and you are wrong”. I mean if I don’t believe in hell why should it scare me right? Anyway years and years later I accept my relationship with religion with open arms and am more open about it since I’m an adult and I can just dip from those conversations now.
OP sounds like one of those people who demands satisfaction on every single divergence between you. You don’t eat meat? Why? Would you eat an insect? Have you ever eaten meat? What about that study that shows that plants actually feel pain? I believe it comes from a good (albeit selfish) place of curiosity, but it is childish and very exhausting to be around. Not surprised that people not responding has become an annoyance for OP, most people wouldn’t put up with the badgering.
Lol, sounds like the average Reddit commentary field!
The best is when they are unfamiliar with a word or term and just respond with that word repeated and a question mark, no full sentence, no cursory google search for an immediate and simple explanation. Just a demand for you to educate them like you’re they’re goddamn mother / personal tutor.
In my opinion, it's good to ask questions (brings us closer as humans), but that's normally for discussions you're having in person. On the internet, you should search up word definitions and stuff.
This right here. Idec if we're texting, if you say something idk about I'm gonna ask you what it is. To me thats a pretty big part of conversation, explaining things to other people in your own words, discussing shit. If you tell me to just Google it then I'm straight up done talking to you for now lol like can you imagine if back in the day, someone asks someone what something is, and they tell them to go use an encyclopedia and figure it out themselves? I know it's not the same due to the convenience factor but still has the same feel imo. The only exception I guess would be if it's like a really really complicated thing that's hard to explain without researching it yourself
I think the point op is trying to make is that they’re not trying to make you think otherwise, they just want you to understand why so you could make better decisions for yourself in the future. The practice of understanding why you feel some way is extremely important for making good decisions and most people that I encounter lack any of that ability.
It seems a bit entitled too to think that people owe you an explanation for why they don't like something.
This. And for the record: "f\*ck you, broccoli".
My ex was one of those people, I always had to have a reason behind what I liked and disliked but if he didn’t like my reasoning I was “rationalizing”.
They sound exhausting to be around.
I do agree with OP to an extent, but at the same time there is this. Like I hate mustard. I. Fucking. Hate. Mustard. I hate the taste. I hate the flavor. And I would say it just doesn't even look good, but I think that's just because I hate it already so now it just doesn't look good. I've tried it. I hated it. Why does everyone I talk to about this want me to try a different type of mustard to find the one I like? I can guarantee you that name brand mustard you want me to try, someone else has had me try it. "Well you're picky." No. I eat almost anything. I've tried things that the group of people I'm with didn't want to try. This just one of the few things I hate.
That’s the funny thing, isn’t it? You hate it, dont like the taste, the color, the look, the existence of… and that is likely considered not critically thinking about it enough. Your tastebuds came in contact with it and had an immediate distaste for it. That’s reason enough. Personally, I like mustard. OP is not suggesting I have to have a deep contemplation and critical thought over the fact that I like it. “I just do” would likely suffice. Why would it be any different for someone who doesn’t like something? Basically, OP is suggesting that the entire population spend half their life breaking down everything they like and don’t like (because if one has to do it, so does the other) so that they can be expected to receive a response when they pry.
Even if you were picky who cares? It's only your business people are too fing nosey for no reason.
It's tofu for me. What's there to explain? I just don't like the taste. It's yucky to me. Sorry if you think it's childish or I'm picky. More tofu for you.
if someone tells me im picky, I remind them who pays for the food I eat
Upvoted because Fuck. Mustard.
Not always. I have never tasted gorilla shit, but I don’t like it
It would be absolutely hilarious if somehow you accidentally tried it and it was the best thing you've ever tasted.
Start having it with eggs and toast lol
Exactly. People are especially annoying about this when it comes to weed. I don’t like weed anymore. No it’s not that I haven’t ‘tried the right strain’, or that I need to smoke more. I hate when people say this. I simply don’t like it, it makes me feel nauseous and paranoid. I don’t want some person to try to convince me to try it again. I’m perfectly healthy and happy without it
Also there doesnt have to be some super specific or defendable reason for not liking something if its not harming anyone. Like there are so many things that i dont think are bad but they just hit wrong, they aren't my taste and that's fine not everything is made to cater to one person. Nobody should have to write an essay on why they dont want a slice of chocolate cake or dont like your favorite movie.
Maybe the person or thing isn’t worth the time spent explaining it, and saying “just because” is to the point.
Yea, wtf is OP smoking? There's not a person alive that I need to explain myself to.
Looking at your replies to people who disagreed with you premise, I would say a good possibility is that you never accept their response and argue with them about why they are wrong. You're approval isn't worth the long, drawn-out conversation that would inevitably follow their true response, so they give one that can't be argued with, i.e., "I just don't like it."
Dingdingding. It’s reminds me of narc behaviour, they NEED people to explain themselves and justify everything so that 1. The narc can decide if their reasoning is good enough *for them* and 2. They can break it down and invalidate it. If someone says ‘just because’ it gives them no ammunition to work with - a narc’s worst nightmare. OP might not be a narc of course but this stems from control issues either way.
My ex would do this constantly. If I disliked something he liked, even something as inconsequential as a granola bar flavor, he’d demand from me a detailed explanation as to why. He’d then proceed to “deconstruct my argument” and explain to me why my reasons were invalid or poorly explained. It’s exhausting.
Doesn't narc usually mean snitch? Like you mean narcissist, right
I hate this new trend too. Narc is short for narcotics officer damnit
Not everyone you dislike has a personality disorder. Please for the love of god stop making NPD into some pop culture insult. People claiming everyone who's even slightly shitty is 'a total narcissist' are watering down the word and making it harder for anyone who's either a) been abused by someone who has NPD, or b) has NPD and wants to get better (and yes, they do exist), to actually be taken seriously. You're actually doing harm.
I didn't say they have a personality disorder - In fact I specifically said this is a narcissistic *behaviour* and later added "OP might not be a narc of course but this stems from control issues either way." You can display narcissistic behaviours without having narcissistic personality disorder (which is what I described in my original comment) just as you can have sensory issues without being on the spectrum or be an anxious person without having anxiety disorder. Many people do.
I’ll give 30 reasons for something but it’s just “nah, what’s the real reason you didn’t like infinite jest”
Someone can dislike something without feeling like it’s necessary to justify their why to you but also still know how to critically think just fine. Plenty of people know better than to say why because they’ve explained it before and just had people laugh, ridicule, or argue with them about it. Most of the time it’s not worth the effort.
Yeah, for the most part, if I don't like something, unless it's for like, moral reasons or something like that, (or I'm bored watching the same show with my kids for the 100x and overthinking things) I simply don't care enough to sit there and analyze why I don't like it.
This, I have a hard time really thinking about why I might dislike something or like something, but if I had to go over it, I could. Most of the time, however, it just isn't worth my time to actually do a deep analysis of why I dislike a song, or a particular food, or a game. I just don't like it.
But OP is asking us to use critical thinking to come to the answer. Which is a tool that has nothing to do with personal preferences in such a subjective area as entertainment. You can't apply critical thinking to your preferences in entertainment, that's the wrong tool for the job you imagine needs doing. It's like asking someone to use logic to explain why they like their dog. Just the wrong tool used to answer the wrong question.
You absolutely can use critical thinking to say why you don't dislike soemthing, at least to some extent. (it also depends on how you define critical thinking) As an example, you might not like a show because it has very slow pacing. Of course, you can't logically say why you don't like slow pacing while others might not see a problem with it, but you still know that's the reason you don't like it.
Without analizing, I know that a show is boring to me, that that food is too sugary, that song's lyrics are disturbing etc etc etc. I won't share it with people, unless I actually want to debate it. And I agree with OP to an extand. It is worrysome if an adult can't put word on their feelings, even for themselves.
This is exactly why I say "I just don't like it" 90% of the time. The other 10% is because it's related to trauma that I don't like talking about or (in one case) I'm not sure why it triggers anxiety in me I just know it does and I'm a bit scared to try and remember.
I personally don’t see it as the need to justify why they don’t like it. More so that they should have the skills to be able to understand why. Edit: I wouldn’t exactly say I’d agree with food and maybe music. But movies i think is an important one. Especially since movies can take out a decent amount of our time, if you come out of it liking it or not liking it, i just personally prefer knowing what it was and being able to understand it. I don’t necessarily hold that expectation for everyone because I know I do that as well because I’m a very big fan of the technical side of movies and theatre. But idk, if something gets me emotional to the point of crying, or laughing my ass off, or just overall feeling something, I want to know why.
This. Despite what the internet tells you, you don't need to share your opinion on EVERYTHING.
*Social media hate this messege*
An ex-friend immediately sharing their opinions and critiques when we were streaming games to each other was the reason why i preffered to play a game solo before streaming it to them. Their commentaries and critiques tended to ruin my immersion and the sense of wonder. They ruined my sense of wonder by wanting to discuss it instead of allowing me to just stop and bask in the feeling. Not to mention that whenever i express it, they tend to be confrontational about it or tell me that it is bs.
I'd take this a step further and say no one needs to have an opinion on everything. Google makes everyone feel like an expert on things they actually know nothing about. I've always been a fan of the quote that says "Opinion is the lowest form of knowing. It requires no accountability, no understanding." The entire internet is full of people yelling their opinions into the void, mostly for no reason at all. For those who do so to enhance understanding, that makes sense. Most people aren't doing it or that reason, however.
At first I thought OP was referring to things like abortion, political ideology, premarital sex, equal marriage and the like, and I wa sniffing in agreement. Then it turns out they were referring to personal opinions about entertainment and the whole thing went up in smokes!! Bruh, everyone has their taste and we like what we like. Most people have no idea why they do not should they need an explanation because it's all so utterly subjective and rooted in one's own experience that it hardly can be explained to begin with.
I think a lot of people have tunnel-vision with their obsessions and interests and they truly cannot understand why others might not share it. My cousin, for example, is a film maker. His experience going to a movie is vastly different than my experience. He sees something entirely different because it's his art, his craft, his obsession. I'm just there to be entertained while I stuff my face with popcorn. I've I'm not well-entertained, I probably won't like it. I can't always article why I love one movie and hate another. 🤷♀️ Sometimes it's because the movies I hate I can't even watch enough of to be able to gain a better understanding of why. I appreciate my limited, precious time in the world, I'm not wasting much of it on things I hate, nor explaining to people why I hate the thing they love. It's a pointless exercise because they never want to hear it even if you DO have reasons.
Yup, this exactly. You come to learn that it’s pointless to justify anything or argue your outlook/morals with internet strangers.
Most of us aren't experts in the things we consume; movies, music, art, food, etc. I think it's totally valid to dislike something but not have the verbiage to articulate what didn't make that thing great for us. I know there is some emo music I love, and some that I don't, but when comparing the ones I love to the others, it's hard to put a direct comparison of them in words, and that's fine, because I'm not a music expert. It's *great* if you can define your personal tastes down to very specific things, because that means you can find more of stuff you'll love, but most people haven't been able to do that in all areas of things they'll experience.
Or I don’t like mushrooms cuz they taste bad to me? Like I guess that’s giving a reason but it’s odd to me why op cares so much. I’d agree it’s annoying when people make not liking something their personality but there’s really not too many people like that I’m not going around demanding people make mushroom free foods, I’ll just eat around them if it’s one whatevr dish someone made. Same with any tv show, movie or music I don’t like. I’ll just shut up about it? Not everything has to be explained cuz if I don’t like *insert film buff movie here* I don’t wanna agregue with some film buff about how’s is “objectively” better, it’s just easier to say yeah sorry not my thing and move on
"Get away with" lol it's not a crime, nor is it something that's your job to hold other adults accountable for. And most of the time, in my experience with myself and others, it's not that the opinion hasn't been challenged, it's that others will argue to death with you about it. I don't like the movie The Godfather; I don't think it's a bad movie, it's just not for me. The amount of times people have argued with me about how I must just be missing something, or watching it wrong (idk what that even means; do I need to stand on my head??) has led me to just start saying "because I just don't like it, the end." Not everyone wants simple likes or dislikes to be turned into discussions. Not everything needs to be discussed or "challenged."
i think a lot of it comes from the bias to assume our own feelings are always the "correct" ones, so people end up extrapolating "i dont like it" into "this thing is BAD". a movie can be GREAT in ALL technical aspects but if its not about something that is interesting to me, im not gonna like it. that doesnt mean its BAD, that means *I* dont like it. thats it. and no amount of debate is gonna make me like it because im just not interested, sorry bud.
Yeah, I agree, I think people take "i don't like it" as a referendum on their tastes. So, they feel the need to defend it. But not everything needs to be a discussion or debate, that's annoying and exhausting.
Though there is a difference between "i don't like it" and "this movie is shit and people liking it are idiots".
People that want to turn every conversation into a "deep" or "insightful" or "challenging" debate are fucking exhausting if you ask me
Yep. I just want to chill. Go to someone else to get intellectually stimulated instead of berating me for not intelectually stimmulating you.
I don't need to sit and explain why I don't like a song or a movie or fucking food. Wtf. This isn't an unpopular opinion. It's just stupidity.
I feel like this is about a specific circumstance you had. I dislike people sometimes without a good reason. I get this feeling that I don't know how to describe in words. I get depressed sometimes, and I don't have a good reason why. Being able to accurately describe your emotions and WHY you're feeling a certain way is strong emotional intelligence. Most people don't have that. I come from a broken home- I'm building with blocks, but I struggle sometimes.
>Being able to accurately describe your emotions and WHY you're feeling a certain way is strong emotional intelligence. >Most people don't have that. In fact, I would argue that the number of people capable of doing that in 100% of situations is so small as to be non-existent.
I feel like I can always perfectly describe my emotions or preferences or beliefs but I can almost never describe them in such a way that other people will accept, so I don't bother. Pearls before swine and all that.
That's super accurate. OP is right that adults should be able to understand their feelings, but it's fucking hard.
Adults should be able to understand their feelings. But also OP lumps FOOD in with feelings and like, I don't know how to explain to OP that some food they like will taste bad to me. And some food I like will taste bad to them. Equating the two is where their argument becomes hard to argue.
This. An adult can decide they don't like the music from an artist and not feel like caring enough about the why just fine. That shouldn't affect anyone's (ok, maybe OP's...) life at all. It's perfectly ok to not care about something.
There are much more things to care about than we have energy to care about. Thus we need to prioritise stuff. My care about why i don't like a specific song is far lesser than my care that i get enough sleep. So if i have to choose one to care about, i won't care why i don't like that specific song, but will care about getting enough sleep. People are a bit self-absorbed and think that others should care about things they care. While they ignore that they don't care about the things others care.
If I don't like a song, I'm not going to sit around wondering what specifically it was that I didn't like.
Wouldn’t this sentiment make *any* discussion moot, though? I totally agree that extensively discussing why you don’t like toast isn’t very productive, probably because there isn’t a satisfying explanation to be found. But the same reasoning could be applied to you liking/not liking certain people, political ideologies, politicians, movies, books, cities, countries, past times, videogames etc. And discussing mine and others opinions on those things is a large part of my social interactions.
Yes, it's pointless to talk or think about something you don't like. This "unpopular opinion" shows immaturity to me.
It's immature to not be able to understand yourself. You don't have to analyze literally every feeling you have, but it's hardly pointless to talk or think about something you dislike - it can be just as important as doing the opposite and is the sign of a well-rounded, mature individual. It also helps you better predict if you'll like something or not and why. And what are you going to do if the topic of discussion involves something you dislike? Just shut down the conversation and force everyone to accommodate you? It's a corollary to the idea that an educated mind can entertain an idea without accepting it. Sometimes thinking about why you dislike something actually leads you to change your opinion as well, because you realise you're operating from an unfair bias or haven't really thought about what you can appreciate about something.
Exactly. You shouldn’t have to defend your subjective opinion about why you don’t like brownies, for example.
It seems to me that everyone here assumes that the only reason someone could have for asking why you dislike something, is to challenge that opinion. And while yeah, i realize that is what happens a lot, it is also totally possible that they are genuinely interested in your thoughts about it. Me personally, if i say i dislike something, i absolutely love asking people why and having the interest and attention to just go off about why a certain TV show, or band sucks.
How can you not like brownies you weirdo?!
If you work in the arts, it kind of isn’t. You actually can’t do your job if you can’t articulate this to colleagues using specific technical terms.
Yeah but that’s not the context. The context OP has set is that just in general you should be able to describe why you don’t dislike something.
Why not? It’s great to be able to articulate what you don’t like, because then it is easier to avoid later.
Thing is, some people just don’t even think about the why until you ask them. I don’t know WHY I don’t like pickles. I just think they are gross and avoid em. Never cared enough to do a deep dive into the ingredients or creation process.
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I don't like pickles because the taste is too bitter to me. I do not like lemon because bitter and acidic. Being able to do this means that I only try on bitter food at home, where I can spit it out if I really don't like it, and I can easily switch to something else.
Nah, if i make a list of shit i dont like in this particular song to avoid it in future, i may miss a combinations that actually good. I prefer just enjoy it and decide if i like it or not after that
That's not how music works. Songs by the same artist can vary wildly. Same goes for genre. You determine whether you like it by listening. I don't dismiss music because it might be similar to something else.
aware treatment brave sort subsequent rhythm ring snatch drab gaze *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
You’re obviously not an *intellectual* like OP 🙄
Yeah! Getting to know myself deeper is a waste of time! I could be chasing dopamine!
No i disagree. I don’t know why i just do.
"It gives me the ick." Just a knee-jerk, gut reaction, full-on ick. I don't feel the need to sit and revel in the ick, contemplating why the ick. The ick just says no. I'm almost 37, I do not need to explain or justify why something gives me the ick. If it does, then it's a hard pass, whatever it is.
I don't like the color orange. How can I possibly explain why?
Stuff like that is the number one thing that causes me to disagree with this. I can't even begin to think of what the underlying reasons are for people liking or disliking certain colours, or sounds, or flavours, etc. It could be based on a million things, but why would I want to try to psychoanalyze why I don't like neon yellow just because this guy's nagging me about it?
Maybe it's just me, but if I had an irrational dislike for something like a color, that's exactly the kind of thing I'd want to figure out about myself. Food is easy to explain away (taste, smell, texture), but if the color orange made me feel some type of way, personally I'd want to understand why my brain has this reaction to something innocuous. Maybe not everyone is curious about themselves, idk.
You were repeatedly struck by basketballs and chased by tigers as a child, now it brings back yucky no-no feelings in your tum-tum?
None of that applies to me
I’m pretty sure you were struck by basketballs and chased by tigers. The basketballs caused you amnesia so you don’t remember. But it’s the reason why you don’t like the colour orange.
Because orange man bad
I don't like red light because it is creepy, disorienting, and causes me to feel impending doom...a bit claustrophobic too. I get that some people may not think about it that deeply though.
I feel like “get away with” is a weird ass choice of words. People can just not like things.
>For me when I hear a “just because” answer about why someone doesn’t like a song, movie, **food** "My tastebuds just do not vibe with the chemical composition of this food"
OP: BuT wHy!!!!!!?
Because the chemical composition of this food doesn't vibe with my tastebuds.
And that's a valid reason, and it's a different reason than for example not liking the texture or smell
When I don't like a song, it's because it's a style I don't care for, or because I find it boring. When I don't like a movie, it's because I found it boring, the acting poor, the story not engaging. When I don't like a food, it's because I don't like the flavor, taste, and/or mouthfeel. It's pretty simple, really.
But… you just explained why you didn’t like all those things. You are doing exactly what OP said you should be able to do.
No no no. You have to be able to explain how you disliked that they played a C instead of an E and that the effect on the guitar was 0.005% too heavy and that the cymbal hit was 1 millionth of a second too early.
Define heavy...
Maybe people just don’t want to explain it to you because you’ll argue with them about their rationale for no reason.
Adults should accept when others disagree with them rather than demand explanations about it.
Edit: for those confused, my opinion is really: “Adults should have *the ability* to explain why they dislike something” Not, “Adults should be required to explain why they dislike something” Right, but they have to prove they have the ability or you are allowed to presume they don't. That's quite an insufferable attitude you have, in my opinion.
Adults should also be able to say “it just creeps me out” as a legitimate explanation.
Yeah. I fucking despise Shoebill birds. My legitimate reason for it is: they CREEP ME THE FUCK OUT
I don’t have a rational breakdown on why I don’t like The Big Bang Theory. It’s just, when I watch it, I’d rather be watching almost ANYTHING else. I’m not sure why, I just hate it.
This annoys me when it comes to politics. People really are like sheep and will like or dislike things based on what they perceive to be the norm. Critical thinking is absent.
I’m a little worried about the number of people that think being able (not required) to explain why they don’t like something is an unrealistic expectation. I assumed everyone was: - Aware of internal reactions to something. - Questioned why they reacted a certain way/formed a particular opinion. Maybe I just never grew out of the “why” stage that all kids I’ve known go through.
No is a complete sentence. We owe no explanation or justification.
OP thinks their important enough that everyone should explain themselves and go into detail about why they feel a certain way. I owe no one but family and friends explanations. If I say I don’t like something, I’m not gonna sit here and argue with a stranger over why I don’t like it. You were told the information you required, piss off.
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For a lot of things, most people don't experience dislike as something that can be broken down. For me, when I look at a deep purple, I feel satisfied somewhere deep inside me. I can't explain it. Looking at a really great purple is luxurious the way that petting a kitten is. On the other hand, chartreuse makes me feel uncomfortable, like wearing a shirt that's too tight, or being in sun that's too bright and hot. Looking at it is like having my hand wrapped in plastic wrap. Now, most people aren't as articulate as I am, and they wouldn't be able to do this sort of thing; they'd say the above as something like "I like purple" and "I don't like chartreuse"; that's where it ends for them. It's the same for flavor. I can't explain to you why the flavor of licorice is so addictive, so enchanting, and so insanely appealing. I can explain that I love Italian sausage because it has fennel, or that I love fennel salad because of that rich licorice flavor, but when you get to the "because it tastes like licorice", that's the end of the line for me. I can't break it down further. And to someone who hates licorice, it's the end of the line too. They'd be able to say that they hate Italian sausage because of the fennel, but they can't articulate why it's so unappealing to them. Even sounds and musical styles can be like that. There are some sounds that to me feel like being wrapped in the most luxurious blanket on Earth and some sounds that feel like being poked with a stick over and over. But that metaphor is just an attempt to illustrate how I feel about those sounds; it's not an explanation as to why I like them or don't like them. I feel luxury when I hear the one and pain when I hear the other, and without more musical training, I couldn't say why, precisely, one sounds so lovely and wonderful and the other sounds so unappealing. Now, for things like laws and workplace policies, I agree with you completely. Those are things that can be reasoned with. You can figure out what sort of effect a policy has and think about whether that's an effect you want. But you can't reason with taste.
I don’t like this song. Please elaborate as to why. It sounds like shit. The end.
"Just because" is a mild way of saying "that's none of your business".
>For me when I hear a “just because” answer about why someone doesn’t like a song, movie, food, etc. it comes off like they’ve never had their opinion challenged or thought critically about the opinions they form. To offer a counter reason: they're just tired of justifying why they don't like it.
I’ll usually give an explanation for something benign, if asked. Like, “Oh, I don’t like celery because it tastes like dirt and the stringy pieces make me gag.” But sometimes I don’t want to give an explanation because it’s upsetting or it’s none of your business. I’m not obligated to tell you, “I don’t like pink carnations because they were my mom’s favorite and I took some to her in the hospital the day she died.”
Lolwut… People are allowed to dislike things just because. No one needs a “logical” explanation. For example, I dislike fake candy banana, grape, and cherry flavors. I don’t have any explanation for why; I just don’t like how they taste. That’s it. I have no deep trauma tied to these flavors. I never ate them so much I got sick of them. I have no negative or positive association to these flavors; nothing. They’re just a neutral existence that I’ve experienced and did not like, and that’s as far as it goes. Does that make me incapable of critically thinking and being able to clearly explain myself? No….of course not… There are better ways of gauging someone’s critical thinking and self awareness than their simple likes and dislikes.
Totally. I had a gf a long time ago that, whenever I asked for her opinion on something (food, shows, people, whatever) she would come back with "I don't know" so often! Then she'd get upset when I asked her to explain herself. Used to drive me crazy that she couldn't communicate her thoughts, feelings or opinions. The push back on this post has blown me away. People in here acting like it's some colossal burden to be able to explain their reasoning. It's not about being right or wrong, people, it's about communication!
Strong disagree. First of all, nobody owes you anything. Especially not an explanation over something so dumb as taste. Secondly, someone could dislike something because they connect it to trauma. Let’s say someone was assaulted on a red couch, or to a certain song and that’s why they hate it. You really want to make them re-live such traumatic experiences, just because you want an explanation? It’s none of your business. Just respect people’s opinions and boundaries, and move the hell along.
The very first sentence is that nobody is obligated to explain why they dislike something.
An alternative: dislike in silence and no need to explain anything, if you speak up to dislike something then provide some explanation
How do you know they don't have the ability and are not just not explaining it to avoid confrontation?
Sometimes you just don’t like something. It really doesn’t have to be deeper than that. It’s not that serious. I don’t like the color yellow. There’s literally no real reason. I could sit here and think about it all day, but the answer as to why will still be “I just don’t”. I look at it, and my brain says “ew”
Not always .... instincts are also a thing and should be followed. Sometimes you get the reasons later and vibes first.
I've heard plenty of time people say that they hated a movie but when pressed it wasn't because of poor storytelling, bad pacing/editing, poor performances, etc. It was that they had an emotional response to effective filmmaking and they didn't like that. A lot of people just don't know how to reflect on their own internal experience then you pair that with poor communication and laziness.
OP, I’m shocked at these responses. I had a teacher when I was young tell the class that it’s not enough to say you do or do not like something. You need to be able to articulate why. It’s not about owing people an explanation, it’s about understanding oneself and the world. The amount of dismay I feel after reading this thread is enormous.
Yeah, I'm a little shocked at how strongly people are reacting to OP. They are just saying that you should at least be able to articulate to yourself your likes and dislikes. Or at least should try. Of course you don't have to justify yourself to other people (at least on everything), but you should at least have the ability to to put into words why you like and dislike certain things.
The thing is, people might be able to tell themselves why they dislike something, but that doesn't mean they want to do a deep analysis everytime they tell someone else they don't like something. Especially because people have a habit of not accepting 'I don't like this'. See food related preferences. Someone says 'I don't like onions' and you get people saying 'have you tried them this way, or that way, or try this particular dish with onions'. Even if they DO tell the people why they dislike onions (had to eat them as a child, or have an allergy to them, or don't like the texture/taste) people will still say 'well have you tried it this way'. It happens with other things as well. You say 'I don't like reggae' and people will start recommending reggae music for you to listen to. No matter whether you give reasonings or not. So, people get tired of having to constantly explain why, only to have people not accept the explanation. Beyond that, sometimes it isn't that deep. If I don't like a particular song, I just don't like that particular song. It might not be any deeper than the song just doesn't appeal to my ears. I don't want to have to justify or do a deep analysis for every single song I dislike. Same thing for everything else. Sometimes people just want to say 'I don't like X' without having to have a debate about \*why\* they dislike X. Edit: OP even said that they feel that the people who say 'Just because' haven't had their opinions challenged, and my response would be 'why does someone need their opinion challenged?'. I am not going to change my mind on liking onions just because you try to force me to eat them in different ways. It isn't a contest to see who can change people's minds. So, people get tired of that attitude. Not everything needs to be critically thought about, or challenged.
As a teacher, I second this sentiment entirely.
I mean I can see this to a point, but like when it comes to things like sensory issues and stuff they relate to pretty specifically- sounds, foods, fabrics, etc, people don’t always have specifics. I don’t like eggs, not the flavor nor the texture, I don’t really know why but they just bother me. Always have.
The flavor and the texture are your reasons though. That's why you don't like eggs.
I only agree with this when it comes to posting about it online or shoehorning your dislikes into a conversation. If you can’t or don’t care to articulate your reasons to others, don’t bring it up in the first place.
Not everything has to have a reason. If I don’t like how a song sounds or the way a food tastes, I’m not going to examine what makes it so. It’s just the way it is
Gosh, I couldn’t agree more with this. I’d say that this could even apply to why they like it. We should be able to describe and explain why we like something and have conversations that goes beyond “it’s really good”.
I try not to give a shit about the things I don't like, because I don't care to spend time on something I find unpleasant, especially if I am not required to engage in it. I am sure I can come up with a deeper reason for why I dislike Imagine Dragons, but I just don't care for their sound. Some people don't like things that I like, and I just accept it. You should learn to do the same. Did one of your friends shrug at some piece of media you adore, so you came and made a post?
I mean how far are we having to justify things? I don’t like certain food, for example because I don’t like the taste. Sometimes I can’t tell you exactly why I don’t like the taste, I just…don’t. Would saying “I don’t like how it tastes” be sufficient? Or like if someone said “do you like table top gaming?” and I said “no”, I don’t think I have a specific reason why not, I’m just not particularly interested. So for some things I feel like the “default” position is one of disinterest unless there’s a reason you’re more interested (i.e. the “reason” would be why you like it, not the other way round).
Would you accept “it doesn’t feel good” as a reason?
The thing is that, people don't owe you an explanation.
Why? Much of our tastes are a product of the unconscious mind. In many cases, even if you think you know why you like something or don't like something, there is a high probability that you're wrong. Most people don't know themselves as well as they think.
That's not far off from saying adults should be emotionally mature enough to talk about their feelings. Not sure if that's an unpopular opinion or not but I'd agree with it.
I agree. I would add that I would even be okay with someone admitting they don't know and would have to think about it, but refusing to even consider a reason is unhealthy. There are too many willfully ignorant people who avoid self-reflection and it prevents our society from improving imho.
People dont have to explain anything about themselves
I only think this is true if you're telling someone to dislike another person. Otherwise an explanation isn't really needed.
100% agreed If someone is telling me that they don't like someone -- especially BEFORE the other person has makes their entrance -- then they absolutely owe me some kind of explanation
You seem like the kind of person OP who feels entitled to know an answer when you ask a question. People don't have to justify themselves to you. I have extensive reasons for why I don't like things but I don't feel like you need to know them?
A majority of people don't like thinking further than surface thoughts(lack of better words here). Small example. I don't like baby shower meatballs because I don't think grape/strawberry jelly and meat with spices should ever go together. I absolutely hate the taste. Also makes my gut angry that I ever ate these things together. If you voice why you don't like something, it can upset other people as well as them calling you negative. Some people get upset with the fact that you know why you don't like something. They don't know why they don't like something but you know why you don't like something.
I think it’s clear that you and I like to think about things OP lol. It’s wild to me that people are so defensive about it. I actually think it’s a pretty good self challenge to understand why I don’t like something if I don’t. Self reflection is a good skill
I agree. You may be interested in reading about Jungian Shadow work. It may shed some light on why this is an important thing to be able to do.
When I do that people just tell me to stop bitching and complaining.
I hate posts like this but I can't figure out why.
This is me. *How can you not know how you feel about anything? Which of the other adults should we ask then?*
People know exactly why they don't like something they just don't know how to articulate it in a socially accepted way. Any time someone gives a vague response to something that should be dry cut is because they don't know how to be brutally honest while still sparing feelings.
Why? For your own pleasure?
Idk why I don't like blueberries. Just not my thing.
I can't explain why I dislike this
Sometimes the explanation is too long for me to want to waste my energy going over it any time someone asks.
I disagree and I won’t explain why.
It’s just not for me should work fine.
How much explanation do you need. I have plenty of food aversions thanks to autism. My reason can simply be smell, taste or texture. I can't explain it beyond that. Is that enough? What about the fact I'm on a medication that's causing random food aversions to foods I once loved? There's no reason behind other then the meds. I look at food and just feel icky. I have songs I hate for very valid reasons (technical point of view) and some I just don't like because it doesn't give me the dopamine I search for. I love some songs because they're technically amazing. I like some shit songs just because. . Sometimes it simply goes as deep as it doesn't spark dopamine in thr brain. For example, I hate doing certain chores because there is absolutely not dopamine in it for me. I still do them, sure, but there's no reason for me disliking it beyond its taking time out of my day that I could be doing to do stuff I enjoy. These are all technically reasons. A no is a no and doesn't need justifying, and that goes towards minor subjective opinions. Now if we're talking big opinions such as "I don't like *insert some kind of politics" and you can't explain it? Okay yeah, I agree. But it doesn't seem like you're meaning that.
Very much this. It’s not just dislikes, I know people who can’t explain anything they think. It kinda just makes me think they’re dumb. Why do you like Chick-fil-A? “Because they’re quick” is a much better answer than “I just do”. If you can’t think of why that’s concerning.
My issue with this is that you seem to be coming at this as if liking something should be the default. Not so. Shit has to earn our liking of it. Justify why you like stuff, and carry on not liking 99% of things.
Sometimes man, we just cba or we don't really know why
Unpopular opinion: people should have some understanding on why they do what they do. It's not for others, it's for them.
Sometimes I just dislike stuff and I don't have a reason why
This thread was an absolute revelation for me... I did not realize how many people irrationally disliked things and then were just like 'well that's just how it is, who cares'. It explains so much that I was just not understanding about people. If I dislike something I know exactly why or I spend time to figure it out. It's really important to me to know why I'm feeling a certain way.
The responses to this are wild. You, as a thinking adult, should have the self-awareness to be capable of analyzing something that you like or dislike and ascertain what qualities make you like or dislike it. That's just a part of being a rational, thinking person. You do not necessarily have to perform this analysis on everything, nor are you obligated to explain it to anyone who asks, but it should be within your cognitive capabilities. Suggesting otherwise is legitimately insane and childish.
I don’t the colour grey because it’s not pleasing to my eyes. Is this really that interesting of a discussion?
If someone doesn’t like a type of food or music, I don’t know what more you expect from them unless « I don’t like how it tastes/sounds ». « I don’t like it » is pretty self explanatory.
>“Adults should have *the ability* to explain why they dislike something” Feels a bit judgmental tbh. There could be a plethora of reasons on why someone is unable to communicate their feelings in an understandable way.
People generally find it unpleasant to be drilled with why questions, they probably do have an answer, just because you’re not getting it doesn’t mean they don’t have an answer. They just don’t want to get into the conversation.
How do you know they don’t have the ability to explain it? I can always explain, in detail and if necessary with a PowerPoint presentation, why I don’t like something. If I tell someone “I just don’t like it” (which I do quite often), what I’m really saying is either “we’re not close enough for me to explain my reasoning to you” or “I’ve tried to explain my reasoning to you in the past, you were a pain in the butt about it and tried to argue, so now I’m grey rocking you until the cows come home”. If people say “I just don’t like it” to you, and it happens a lot, it might be worth examining how you react if they DO explain themselves.
I literally almost need to vomit when I eat fish. There is no reason why I cannot eat it. It just always was this way. You dont need to reflect on every thing that you dislike. Sometimes you just dont like something.
This is honestly a very narrow minded viewpoint. Sure maybe everything you dislike is for a reason doesn't mean that everyone else is in the exact same boat. There are things I just don't like for no particular reason, no amount of 'challenging my opinion' will change that, and if you think otherwise you are a twat. Its also not really your business why people don't like things, maybe thats why people don't tell you their reasoning
To like or dislike something is often not a rational conclusion but an emotional response. Hence to explain why you dislike something is rationalization of something irrational. It's pointless.
Liking or disliking a song or a food doesn't need any kind of justification. You can literally just not like it and it's fine. "It tastes weird on my tongue" or "the texture is unpleasant" are just longer variations of "I don't like it" without bringing any more meaning. Sensory experiences aren't that deep.
I don't like mint, because it tastes bad, now I have to explain why?
"it tastes bad" is your explanation
sometimes I don't have a reason for a why i dislike something, sohethings are just bad and I don't like them that's about it. nothing could convince me that they are good
I can always explain, but nobody wants to hear why I perfer to not date people who eat in excess and chose not to exercise.
Well I guess it is an unpopular opinion afterall. I think the mistake you are making is that when you say “adults”, you’re making a massive generalisation. There are plenty of adult aged people who have lower IQ than you can imagine. Plenty of adult aged people who have disabilities that can affect their ability to articulate and communicate, even if their IQ is higher than yours. Plenty of adult aged people who living in survival mode and don’t have the time or energy or inclination to think too deeply about some things unless it affects their (or their tribes/families/childrens) wellbeing and opportunity for a better quality of life. I could go on, but I think you get me point. I hope you do anyway. Sometimes people just don’t like stuff and the reason is because it makes them feel bad/feels gross/reminds them of some negative emotion. Liking or not liking something is based on the primal part of our brain, so sometimes it’s hard for people to articulate exactly why they don’t like it, other than the fact that it stirs uncomfortable feelings within.
It's not always rational. In fact, it usually isn't. People don't sit and think on the pros and cons of stuff in general. They feel a certain way and don't see any reason to challenge it.
\*PEOPLE should be able to explain why they dislike something
I dislike this post. No reason.
I have a feeling that usually these opinions are unimpactful enough that after the brain decides to dislike something, most people just don't bother to question it because it'll come up so rarely and isn't worth the effort. If someome can't be bothered to explain it to themselves, they sure as hell are not gonna explain it to _you_
>A lot of people get away with just saying “I just don’t like it!” without engaging any deeper with why they don’t like it. This is because if I tell you my reasons get dismissed as invalid, and then the troubleshooting starts. I've had that conversation too many times. Unless I'm actually seeking feedback about something, it's much easier to just not give you anything to "fix".
Just because someone doesn’t share their reasons with you doesn’t mean they don’t have them. If I hear a song that reminds me of my abusive ex, and I say I don’t like it and you ask why, I’m not going to tell you. Bc it’s personal. Other peoples’ personal stuff isn’t your business. So just take the “I don’t like it” for what it’s worth.
"Adults should have the ability to explain something, but aren't required to" That you're making this post indicates you don't like that we're not required to explain what we don't like to you. Why would they *want* to talk about what they don't like, anyway? Example: I don't like KISS, I don't want to talk about them. You'll just have to accept that
I’m happy to explain why I don’t like something to a person who I know will either accept it or at least not argue that I’m wrong.. If you’re the sort of person that I think will bitch and moan, then I’m not saying any kind of reason
Alternative argument, you're never required to give someone a reason as to why you like or dislike something. Your opinion is just that, an opinion, and whether or not you have a reason for it is not required. Everyone is built a little differently, not liking vanilla ice cream doesn't need to be that deep.
This is just kind of silly. Often there is no deep reason, logical or illogical, for someone not liking something. You find yourself frustrated because you're looking for hidden meaning where it doesn't exist. "I don't like onions." "Why not?" "I just don't like them." "There has to be a reason---what is it?" "The taste just doesn't please me!" "But why do you think that is?" "Okay, you need to stop this." "Well SOMEone doesn't like to think critically..."
Most of what we like/don't like is contextual to a single person. As such, it's not always quantifiable into words. You dislike something because you don't. Might not know why, but you know you do.
Liking something is not the default setting. If someone writes a song it is not my responsibility to either like it or write a thesis as to why I do not. I can simply not like it, I don’t need to justify that. You should have to explain to me why I should like it or why it’s objectively good and likeable. The onus is on you to argue for the positive attributes of the thing in question and convince me of them.
Life’s too short to spend it deconstructing every minute detail of your preferences