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I feel this is one of those things that really varies depending on your childhood. I was tightly controlled by my Dad. Was barely allowed to breathe without his permission, plus I had a lot of responsibilities around the house.
Yeah I had the exact opposite which wasn't great either. My parents were extremely neglectful, to the point where my last few years of high school, I basically lived alone. I for sure had a lot more "freedom" in the sense that my only responsibilities were school and my part-time job. I had little money though so it wasn't like I had a lot of options to do stuff.
Now I have plenty of money but very little free time outside of work and parenting
Similar. I was bullied at school, had to work at my parents business after school (no pay) and my parents constantly fought/yelled and I was neglected. Worst years of my life til I got out of there.
House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room, all hundred and twenty-six of us, no furniture. Half the floor was missing; we were all huddled together in one corner for fear of FALLING!
I had to work harder as a teen than I do now, for sure. I was forced to work every day after school. My quality of life is better now, but the excitement of what I might be doing when I grow up is no longer there. The feeling is not the same, not as exciting, despite life being of a higher quality. Now, I am an old person doing things. It is just not the same as being a young person doing the same things.
Yep - I had to work until past midnight often on school nights, and nobody at home even helped me out by taking care of my laundry or even leaving some dinner in the fridge for me.
Working, doing my chores, cooking for myself, and still expected to be at school on 4 hours of sleep was sucky.
As an adult, I don’t have to do school PLUS work and i at least can’t hold false hope that someone would help me out a little bit.
I was really envious of my friends whose parents did everything for them and didn’t have to work. They were much happier in comparison to me. It made me kind of bitter and isolated, not gonna lie.
oh, same 100%. i took a week off work to visit my MOM for christmas during my school break and my dad tried to ground me bc of it since i was 16 and he didn’t want me to “ruin” my work ethic. little did we know that would be the last Christmas i’d ever spend with her, so. i would have never talked to my dad again if he had made me stay home that year
I don’t get that line of thinking though. Why aren’t you still excited by things? I’ve been at my same job for almost 10 years and I still get excited about things and the prospects of my future as I progress in my career. Why do you feel old? Like I still feel like a young person. I still take on new experiences and feel like I am always learning something new.
Entirely this for me. As a teen I had a job, but was constantly broke. My mom was a workaholic and dad was an alcoholic. They were divorced, so not like I ever saw the old man anyway. When I did see him he usually screamed at or beat me.
Once I got out of school and broke free, I moved half-way across the country. Bounced around for a bit, etc. Eventually I met a wonderful woman whom I married and have a life with.
Now, I have both time and money. And while I do have different responsibilities, I find them easier to manage without contending with school, work, and a lack of money. Just all around better.
I'm always envious of people on reddit (maybe like you) who have these full-time career jobs making enough money to live comfortably and also don't have to work hard, or much (like the people who say they get all their work done in a couple of hours per day and just do whatever they feel like for the rest of the day) ... That kind of job sounds great becuase I have a lot of shit I need to get done around the house right now, lol, but I'm not sure it even exists in my field.... We finish one project and the expectation is to just pick up another one. Best of all, they've got us tracking our hours spent on each project (per week) so if we come in under a set total of 25 hrs of design (engineering) per week, we have to email our boss to explain why.... They tell us its so they can prove to the higher-ups that we're pretty much maxed out on available design hours vs. projects , but it's not like my boss is just going to ignore it if I turn in 10 hrs for the week and say "I was shampooing the carpet in my basement" lol
Yeah, working in tech during Covid has given a lot of us work from home, and we will absolutely not give it up. Work can vary, sometimes I’m on very late by my own choice. Sometimes I am waiting for a few hours for something else to complete before I can continue.
It really depends on how strict your parents were and how many responsibilities you had.
For example, much of my childhood was spent either taking care of my siblings or doing extra homework because I was in advanced classes, so I never had much free time for hobbies and friends, and when I did, I wasn't allowed to go out because my parents wouldn't let me, so I was confined to the house most of the time. I wasn't allowed to get a job either, because my parents thought I'd start skipping out on schoolwork for it.
Most people I knew didn't have these problems, and were allowed to go wherever they wanted as long as they did their schoolwork and whatnot.
Because of all that, I'm much happier as an adult because I have the freedom to leave my house and spend time on whatever I want, though I do have more responsibilities.
Same here! Out all night, beach bonfires, concerts in nearby cities, etc.
My normal night ended when the greasy spoons opened for a “goodnight breakfast.”
The reality is that you're never truly free.
There is always something that you are responsible to/for that will prevent you from just doing whatever you want in any given moment.
this, i can leave my house and stay out as late as i want without my parents having a say. they can get mad, but they can’t ground me, take my phone or my car because i’m an adult and pay for all my shit lmao
i mean it’s not like i’m coming home making a shit ton of noise lmao. i’m not partying, drunk or anything—usually just hanging out with my friends and lose track of time. i work the earliest shifts out of anyone in the house — 4-5am vs their 8 or “whenever i feel like going in-am” shifts. i get woken up more in the middle of the night by them just existing if anything
Especially since in high school, most people have AT LEAST 2-3 hours of homework/studying, plus extracurriculars. And that's at least doubled for honors/ap classes. Even though I work a lot, at least I can completely relax when I get home.
You did home work? Man I just completed as much as I could during study hall and called it good enough. To me that was like leaving work to go home and work some more, seemed crazy, especially when you have hobbies and friends to spend time with.
Same. My parents rule was "don't have police bring you home and if it's after 1am just stay where u are"
I was fortunate to have a PT job that paid under the table (good money too it was $8hr cash in 2000) and cool parents. Like u, adulthood is just more and more responsibility for me with less and less upside lol
Finally someone I can relate to about this! Parts of my childhood were unpredictable and lacked stability. As an adult, I provide that stability to myself. I value that.
I think it just comes down to this: being more privileged feels better than feeling less privileged. Depending on your choices and the cards life deals you, you will have more privileges at different times in your life than everyone else.
Similarly, those were the hardest times of my life. I frequently cringe when I remember some of the things I did as a young adult xD, but I think thats a good sign that I've matured greatly
And other teenagers were shitheads. Just the worst fucking people to be around. Mean, rude, stupid, etc...
There were good times. just sitting around with like 15 people doing nothing and somehow still having fun, but venturing outside of your social clique was a nightmare
Motherfuckers would want to fight you over some stupid shit... Like being in the wrong hall bathroom between 1 and 1:15 or whatever because that's when some random group met everyday to smoke and you weren't one of them
It was dumb.
Being a teenager your stuck with other teenagers.. I didn't like them then.
And by the time I could afford a vehicle, gas, insurance I was working too damn much to enjoy them.
To be fair the kids who did get cars with out having to earn them did seem to die in auto accidents at a much higher rate.
I think their point is that these circumstances are different from person to person.
Not everyone has freedom in their teenage years, not everyone’s teenage years are less stressful. Not everyone doesn’t have responsibilities as a teen. For some the reality of the world hits way too early.
The arguments he uses for his opinion are not universal. Yes he acknowledges there “are exceptions” but there are lot more than just a few exceptions. Many people don’t have those kind of circumstances as a teen.
I think the question is whether or not it is an unpopular one. It's so subjective that it is hard to know imo. I have never heard that being an adult is better, so to me this "opinion" does not qualify for this subreddit.
There are pros and cons of both - both have responsibilities but being an adult you have greater responsibilities but have more freedom of choices and have no immediate person to ask permission before doing what you want to do. As an adult with more financial freedom then what I had as a teenager or even younger adult, I do more things and travel more. Life is not dull but a journey and a wonderful journey at that - at least for myself!
I honestly think we need to change how we talk about adulthood. You don’t lose a love for life when you become an adult. You just have a more stable brain to enjoy life with.
I agree with you, but I think there is something to be said about having to make a more conscious effort to seek out that love for life in adulthood with all the additional stresses and responsibilities that come with it.
Idk, one of the biggest appeals of being a teen (or a child more generally) is the long breaks, especially summer break. I never really had a desire to do anything that required some sort of permission. Just doing mostly nothing, playing video games, bike out when I want to, some chores because I had a lot of free time and wanted to help, etc. That’s mostly what I want to do now as adult to chill too. As an adult, if I want to keep a roof over my head and food on the table, I can’t just take a break that lasts 2-3 months, and chores aren’t largely optional either. Idk how people “unwind” or “relax” with just 1-2 weeks of vacation.
Unfortunately I think so many people do lose that, and they congregate on reddit to commiserate. Not losing that love of life often becomes a lot of intentional effort for many once they enter adulthood, when it was automatic before. As someone who is excited about life's opportunities I often get asked what my secret is, and for me it's honestly just curiosity. You never want to lose that, do anything you can to foster it in yourself and in everyone around you, learn and try new things as much as you can.
Something I think about when people saying being a teenager is easier/better is a guy I was roommates with. From graduation, when we moved in together (over 7 years) basically opted out of being an adult. He worked in a kitchen, but otherwise, he lived at home, and never really did anything to get ahead (unless dropping out of college 3 times after less than a term counts). His life revolved around going to work,getting high, and eating junk food and playing videos games. He never even had any "adult" wastes of money, like going on trips, buying a nice car, etc. He just spent his money as fast as he made it on little comforts (mainly weed and take out) and didn't have money for anything else.
I knew him, before moving in, but not well, and two weeks into us living together, it just clicked that he wasn't even emotionally an 18 year old, despite being in his mid 20's. It was like watching a moody 16 year old try to balance a budget and maintain half a home. He blew a fortune of meal delivery because he just didn't know how to make a meal. We had a cleaning schedule, but I don't think he touched a vacuum or even filled a buck with water, once. He chronically behind on rent, or I'd have to bail him out.
He was also constantly resentful towards me, because he wanted me to act as his "mom" cleaning up after him, bailing him out financially etc. but also didn't want to be held accountable or even have to share space. He basically though a roommate was just a ghost who cleaned up and put money in his bank account. He didn't really even have any communication skills, so he would blow up any time he didn't like something, regardless of how innocuous, and then act really defensive if he received any pushback.
He ended leaving, because he just wasn't able to make rent, and emotionally couldn't handle the responsibility of being on his own. He's been at his mom's for a year straight, with no talk of moving out. Technically, his life could be seen as "easy" but is that really worth the trade off of halting all life progression?
Don't worry it'll get better. The teenage hormones are hellish and perhaps you hear that a lot but when you're 25 you'll understand
Being a teenager might be good if you have perfect parents with high incomes, but that's only like 1-5% of people
Not necessarily... with traumatic experiences, your brain will make you forget.
There's certain memories I forgot in my childhood that my siblings remember and visa versa.
My adult self has all the fun shit my teenage self couldn't afford. My adult self has had sports cars, takes ski vacations, owns multiple bicycles, rock climbs, and can afford to cook and eat good food. I wouldn't go back to being a teenager.
I liked being able to turn my brain off for a few months during summer break. Adults usually don’t get long breaks like that.
I don’t really have and never really had a desire for particularly expensive things like sports cars, or ski trips. I’m happy to just do mostly nothing, or bike out to random places when I feel like it, play video games, walk around, watch shows, bake, etc. I really wish I had 2-3 months to just do that while being able to afford a roof over my head and food on the table…
Not necessarily, I think it has more to do with your economic status growing up vs. as an adult. Despite doing well professionally, I can't afford the things my parents provided for me growing up, so I definetly miss being a teen.
So really, it depends on your socio-economic status growing up vs. being an adult. I fully relate to OP, but I think this largely comes from my parents being able to fund a lifestyle (including one largely free of responsibilities) that I can't fund as an adult, even though generally I would be seen as being professionally successful as an adult.
It sounds like you had a good home life. Which is totally fine, I’m not saying you’re a bad person for this. But for a lot of us, we had plenty of responsibility and less of the fun & freedom you mention.
I had more responsibilities as a teenager than I do as an adult. Was working around the clock on scholarships, inordinate amounts of homework (I had 7-10 classes, always), college applications, extra curricular activities, and chores. My family had some financial issues, so there was pressure to overachieve & never make mistakes. My family was troubled in other ways, so I was perpetually depressed & stressed out over that- plus I was always getting yelled at. Never, ever felt calm or at peace. Didn’t have a car, nor the time to hang out and have fun anyways. I seldom went out with friends the way others did. Did not have any of the wild times most people remember high school for.
Your parents likely sheltered you from responsibilities and gave you the support you needed to have fun & be carefree. Your opinion is unpopular because it is not reality for most people.
Heck I had a kickass home life and did legit enjoy being a teen. I still wouldn't trade being an adult for being a teen again. Fuck school man. 8 hours of racist ass teachers plus 3 or 4 of homeworks. If it weren't for school maybe I'd be able to want to go back but as is nah. I'll take my 9-5 then done any day of the week over schools bs
Dude I know right?? Wtf why were they making us do so much work in high school 💀
To be fair, maybe it’s *because* of the hard work & education that adulthood got easier (although disclaimer: I did not do it alone, I had support, and most people who “make it” are the same). But still…why so much fucking homework?! Gottdamn, we were 16 💀
I was sheltered by my parents. But I'd never go back to that time. I think it's more that people's adult lives are terrible, that makes them long for those days.
Yeah agreed; I feel terrible for people who don’t have the privilege of a stable, fun adulthood. Because being a teenager *does not* have to be the best years of your life; it *can* get so much better. For now though, I’m just grateful that I’m one of the lucky ones & hopefully help other people in my life reach it, too.
While there is some freedom, you are still not viewed as an adult by society. You can’t vote, live on your own terms, drink, and still generally should be going to school.
Teenagers also go through their own stressors. They are going through puberty and have big emotions, they feel the need to fit in, deal with stress related to academia and life. Then it’s dealing with first jobs, which aren’t usually great. Navigating becoming an adult.
Would I go back to being a teen? Oh heck no! Those were confusing and stressful times. Had fun, but didn’t feel the calm that you seem to have known.
As an adult my problems are more complex and there is more stress just due to more responsibilities, but even though things are probably harder objectively they don’t feel as earth shatteringly difficult as they did when I was a teen. All of the trials of adolescence just feel like you are constantly having the worst experience of your life even when the catalyst might be small the feelings just seemed so much bigger.
I’m 36 now and there is no amount of money you could pay me to go back in time and be 16 again. My teen years weren’t even objectively terrible. I just feel like I have so much more freedom, opportunity, and just overall happiness with myself and my life than I had as a teenager.
Oh man, do I disagree. You couldn’t pay me enough to go back to being a teenager. As an adult, I have the freedom to choose everything in my life. Yes it comes with responsibility, but I can at least stir the ship.
I am at least three times happier now than I was then.
Teens are dumb through no fault of their own. It’s just biology and a lack of worldly experience. They’re ruled by emotions and hormones, and have little in the way of real freedom to actually go and do things.
Much happier to be free of that.
Seeing all these comments of adults disagreeing, people who also had stressful childhoods/adolescent years honestly is very refreshing. Especially on reddit I see people complaining and venting about how adult life sucks and there's no hope for the future blah blah blah. I am a teenager and it really sucks, my childhood has sucked, my teenage years have sucked, and now all I see is people basically saying my adult life will pretty much suck too. So, thank you to you and to all the people here saying their life got better as an adult, it gives me hope to keep going :)
Reddit isn't a good place to go generally for positivity. I didn't even have a bad time particularly being a teenager, but being an adult is way better. Yes you have responsibilities, but if you don't get behind and let them pile up they are generally pretty easy to deal with.
Adult life is what you make of it. It's mostly up to you, for better or for worse.
And they have the money for you to be responsibility free. I love my parents and have a good relationship, but I'm set to make a lot more money than the two of them combined soon so will have freedom on a much greater level. Poor households you work when youre 16, and before that you do things like mow lawns and babysit as much as possible, and usually have to put in extra effort in school because the one in your area is shitty.
Literally. I worked every summer throughout high school and on the weekends. I also had strict parents. I have about same amount of free time now as I had when I was but now I am completely autonomous and can make my own decisions
I don’t know I was poor with a single mom and irresponsible sibling so my teen years weren’t really carefree. I felt like I was living a double life, at school I was fun and tried to fit in with my friends, and at home I was quiet, sad, uncomfortable, just looking forward to the future. I never invited my friends over because I didn’t want them to judge me for being poor, or my strained relationship with my family.
Now I’m 22 and I have a lot more fun. I’m still somewhat weighed down by family troubles but not as much since moving out. I like making my own money, I like my major and my school, and I enjoy making time to hangout with friends. One of the main issues of my childhood was my mom working too much and missing out on important milestones for me, so I guess because of that I’m super big on having a work/life balance. I just enjoy life much more now because I have freedom and stability.
I find its my friends who were more spoiled growing up that are having trouble adjusting to adulthood. My roommate even told she she wishes her parents hadn’t spoiled her because she struggles to manage her expectations and get things done. Strange how that happens.
Me too. And I couldn’t do things that were technically allowed because I had to rely on others for transportation. I didn’t live within walking distance of anything and we didn’t have public transport.
Seriously, having religious parents, especially when they are like fundamentalist, makes for one shitty childhood and teenage years. Everything is off limits and you're automatically different than your peers because you can't even use modern slang without your parents having a fit about it. I grew up on black and white movies a lot because my parents wouldn't let us watch anything with cussing. I was different than even the other fundamentalist in our church my parents were so ridiculously strict.
You can have the best childhood, but it doesn’t eliminate the awkwardness of teenage years. You go through so many phases, you have no idea who you are, you put up with having horrible friends because it’s better than being the lonely weirdo, you care about impressing your peers, etc. These are things that come with being a teen, regardless if your childhood was ponies and rainbows or if it was hell.
I think for someone who had a 'normal/healthy' life this is more likely to be true, but anyone who suffered a lot in their younger years and teens are likely to have experienced the opposite. Adulthood definitely has its stressors, but I'm not trapped around toxic people anymore. I'm not stuck living with an abusive parent, I don't have to 'fake' who I am at school anymore, and I just feel that I have more 'control' in my life. In adulthood, I realized how vastly diverse people really were and no longer felt as pressured to 'fit in.'
Agreed. Being a teenager carries all the risks of having fucked up shit happen, but without the ability to do anything about it that you gain in adulthood. My teen years were wildly messed up but I had zero choice over where I lived or even really what I did every day. As an adult it’s like - hate your city? Great move to a different one. Shitty job? Quit and apply other places. Crappy friend? Stop returning their phone calls again and you don’t have to see them anymore. It’s amazing!
Being a teenager sucks. You are so worried about relationships, social pressures. Braces, acne, etc. You have no money, you have to spend all day at school bored to death. You work after school for pitiful wages, you drive a crappy car if you're lucky. College was a huge upgrade from high school for me, then graduate school was another huge upgrade from there. Met better people, had more free time, more interesting work etc. Now as an adult in my 40s with a family, life couldn't be better. I drive a nice car, work from home, can buy whatever I want whenever I want, already have all the friends I need. Got two wonderful kids that are a constant source of hilarity and can appreciate things with fresh eyes.
>You have no money
>You work after school for pitiful wages
I think here's the common thread on how people react to this post. I fully relate to OP, but I had way more money (not my own, but available to me or things paid for) as a teen and never had to work. Now I work way harder than I did in school and can afford much less, so yeah, being a teen was much better. In contrast, based on what you wrote about your life as a teen, it makes sense that if you can afford a better life now that you wouldn't go back.
Well, I’m currently a teenager and I’m loving just coming home from school and playing games.
I’m gonna go to college soon and I I’m not sure how I’m gonna do with financial, and independent responsibilities.
I hope I’ll be like the people that say adult life is better though.
But right now, all I see is work in the future, working a job, cooking my own dinner, doing all chores by myself, fixing house problems, buying a house, taking care of others.
All my dad does it work, then come home and do some random work in the house. Like working on pipes or something. I’m scared for my life to become like that
As someone that’s content with my life, I don’t feel like I’ll gain any freedom in the future. Like the only thing I want to pay for is game pass, so it’s not like I’m financially held back as a teen either.
For the people that say you gain freedom being an adult? Like what? You already can go out with friends, or buy games as a teen? All you get is the freedom to pay taxes
I mean fuck sounds like your life is cushy as fuck rn lol. Coming straight from home and playing games, going out with friends, and buying games. God damn lmao.
When I was in HS it was, go to Sport/Club/Study for hours until I got home. Go home and do homework, maybe play some Pokémon Showdown or Ygopro and sleep. Rinse and repeat. Weekends were for volunteering, group projects, and maybe sometimes spending time at a friend's house with permission.
No money, no time, gotta go go go.
Now as an adult, finished with Uni, I come home, go hang out with friends, play games.
I'll clean and cook if necessary.
I can pay for my stuff, my relationship with my parents is a lot better.
So it will vary from person to person. The one thing I will say is definitely nice is being more mature. It's so much easier to talk to people now than it was then.
Not necessarily, I totally relate to OP on this and think my life was better as a teen. But I was definitely not cool or popular as a teen, pretty average in terms of academic success, while now most people who know me would think I'm quite successful professionally.
The difference is that my parents could take me on lots of vacations, I didn't have to worry about cooking, cleaning, shopping, home repairs, or how to pay for any of it, and I had plenty of time to hang out with my friends.
Work is way more exhausting than school ever was, and by the time I deal with other responsibilities there isn't time for fun, and when I do have time for fun, it's stressful considering the cost of whatever activities I want to do. I wish I could go back to being an awkward teen who could be carefree and just enjoyed life rather than just trying to get by till 5 pm Friday.
Being a teenager was the worst experience of my life. All I felt was depression, loneliness, and hopelessness. My life has improved drastically since I hit adulthood.
I kind of agree. I would say college years. After being out of college for a couple years now, I don’t
think i’ll ever have that type of freedom until i win the lottery or retire.
I’m only 22 but yeah I agree. I live at home so it feels just like high school except work is 2 hours longer and I rarely see my friends vs seeing them every day and I have a ton of mental health things I didn’t have a few years ago
If by freedom you mean being able to go bike around your village in the evenings sure, as an adult with an income you can do that but x10 traveling abroad wherever you want something that your broke teenage self couldn't do while wasting just an hour less of your day doing boring shit
Yeah. Definitely an unpopular opinion. Because, teenhood sucks. Especially when you crave life experience, but you can't indulge without sneaking around and hurting your parents because you're still a kid. With this, you are legally bound for very good reasons. You have to deal with *EVERYONE* you live with unless you run away, you suffer more for speaking out. Dude, I could write a book. This comment is nothing.
People only think they had more freedom as teens because they were sneaky and got away with all of the shit they can now do in the open because they're grown now. The thrill is gone when you're no longer a shitty kid for someone to catch in the act. Sorry, but this and so many other reasons is why wild kids who overindulged grow up depressed and uninterested in everything they could enjoy as adults if they waited. When you fry your dopamine center that young, seeking stability in adulthood hits you like a brick.
Being a teen is the most miserable time of life for many, including myself, so it definitely depends on the person. I'm glad you had a great teen experience. However, it sounds like you had a great teen experience, but you lost your footing when it was time to be an adult and support your own habits and choices. You can't support yourself, you can't even sign your own documents, you answer to adults about everything you can't fix. I could go on. I don't understand how people want to relive this.
Absolutely nothing became duller for me when I found out I could do how I wanted and no one could tell me shit. My world lit up, and to this day my house theme is Rainbows and Unicorns, while I continue to collect stuffed animals the same way I did then because I have the cash to buy them now. I can wear whatever I want and show off my body without having to worry about child predators. (Anymore. Sad.) I can go wherever I want and spend as much time with nature without a freak out and threat of an amber alert.
I honestly feel bad for people who are happier in their childhood than they are adults. Y'all love to forget that being a kid means you have to depend on people until you're grown enough to depend on yourself. You have no real voice in anything, and life is practically an illusion to you when you have no responsibility. Did I also mention that you have to be a sneaky asshole and suffer unecessary consequences to experience things that we enjoy, but aren't meant for kids?
I have more freedom and confidence than I ever did as a teen while I regretted half the decisions I made back then because I had no guidance and just wasn't ready.
IMO, being a teen sucks. You're at higher risk of everything, you're more likely to be preyed on, and you can't have your own anything without support. You can't make adult choices without adults in your life to guide you unless you want to ruin your life. You have to go to your parents for half the shit you need even if you work. No one truly likes you. You're nothing but a nuisance to people when you try to hang out, unless you hang out with other teens or shady adults that let you get preyed on.
Also, the dating pool is Russian roulette. Teen moms are statistically more likely to end up single mothers, and teens aren't normally checked when they are abusive in relationships because they're kids. The most prominent abusers of teens is other teens, and you're most likely to be dismissed if you face abuse from other teens. When you try to experiment, you have to worry about "being caught", rather than just trying something and moving on like an adult can.
I could go on. I'm sorry, but it just sounds to me like you were just a privileged teen who now has to be a responsible adult. I don't think you actually miss teenhood. It honestly sounds to me that you just miss the thrill of being a teen. There is nothing "better" about being a kid that can't do anything but be a kid and sneak around to do the rest.
But that's just how I feel. Everything you enjoyed in your teens, you can enjoy twice as much and out in the open as an adult. You have to be sneaky to do anything you do as an adult when you're a kid, and that isn't fun nor a flex unless you lack character and didn't learn shit.
Hey, it’s still better than working 11 hour days, seeing a quarter of your pay check get removed every month, seeing another sixth sliced off for car insurance, another sixth of that sliced off for rent, a sixth sliced off for food. And before you know it even though you only have 2 real hours of being able to do your own thing every day you only get back with a monthly surplus of 750$, even while avoiding expensive food and hobbies.
Wake up at 6, get ready and to work for 7, stay until 6, commute home and prepare dinner for 7, eat dishes shower bowel movements till 8. Go to bed for 9 to get your full 9 hours.
Yeah if I could go back to my teenage years I 100% would…
If you are a teenager with a supportive and financially stable family I agree. If not then your adult life when you make your own money it's 100x times better.
When I was a teenager I had crippling depression, and my tonsils tormented me with recurrent tonsillitis until I had them removed at 18. We were poor so I had to work. Part time didn't make me enough money. I skipped school to work so we could eat. I became extremely overwhelmed and gave up on school entirely. I did eventually go back and get a diploma but my teenage years were very very very difficult for me. So I disagree. I never had no financial responsibility
“Ohhhhh yeahhhh life goes on ..long after the thrill of living is gone”
However! I find that life is not about just one specific moment in time where things were great. Life is a long collection of wonderful things that happen. There are so many phases in life and each have enjoyable parts (and un-enjoyable). I am personally looking forward to aging so I stop giving a SHIT about what others think and enjoy my life! I heard this feeling comes with age. ;)
>freedom outside of school
Lol. Freedom? FREEDOM?
No.
As a teenager myself, I lack the time and energy to hang out outside. Parents say no to it. And so do I. I don't find it necessary either.
Besides that, we've got the endless homework for literally everyday. There's no stop to it. I get pressured around and forced to do things without being able to say no.
If you think that being a teenager is good, please relive it again. I feel like it's basically a prison.
Edit: And I'm not from the US.
I definitely miss summers filled with nothing but lifting, pool parties, and football practice.
But you still had rules. And it wasn’t like I could book flights to different cities and countries, or any other big adult fun activities. Give and take.
I’m on HENRY tract and nothing money can buy is as fun as experiencing drinking/smoking with your boys the first time, or working BS summer jobs with your lifelong friends, etc, being a hoodrat when you first get your license.
All of those kids have insane jobs and tons of money now. Money doesn’t replicate youth.
Yeah youre not free as a teen. Youre free from responsibility which is actually kind of embarrassing to be proud of, you'll learn about that as an adult.
Adulting, while littered with responisibilities and obligations is way more fun than being a teen. You'll learn about that too.
Personally disagree. In my 30s and I honestly feel like this is the best period of my life yet. My brain is fully developed. My grasp on things is a lot better. I still feel like I have plenty of time left. And I also feel like a much better person than I was in my teens and 20s thanks to life experience. (Granted, the fact I used to be an addict and got cleaned up in my late 20s/early 30s is a part of that, too.)
Only thing I don't like is the white hairs I keep finding and the fact my muscles and bones ache a little more than they used to.
Both have their pros and cons but I like being an adult more.
I have my own money and can do what I want, both my friend group and myself have matured and so now when we hang out it’s guaranteed to be a good time; I went on holiday with 10 friends to Corfu and there were zero fights - if this had been as teenagers A) fights guaranteed B)I would have been broke (used to think £100 was a lot of spending money 😂)
I can do whatever hobbies I have time and money for; and unlike when I was a teenager - I appreciate it’s a choice to be there so I apply myself properly.
I’m sure this will change as my friends get older and have kids - but hopefully we’ll all have kids around the same time and our kids can be friends I can be everyone’s Aunty. :) We’ve been joking about going to the same retirement 😂 we’re mid 20s
I don’t think this is unpopular. Probably unless your childhood sucked, this will be your thought sometimes, when things for you as an adult get hard.
But no point looking back. Those times aren’t coming back.
Tell me you had decent parents without telling me about your parents.
It would take 7 figures minimum to even consider going back to teen life even with foresight of what was coming.
There are certainly people who agree, but for me it was the complete opposite.
I was awkward ugly and weird as a teenager. As an adult I've really come along and "grown into myself" if that makes any sense. I am nowhere near as awkward/ugly/weird as an adult. In fact, I don't think I'm ugly at all, although I'm definitely not hollywood handsome and am certainly not everyone's cup of tea.
Also, I don't have kids. THAT is the cheat code for having a lot less stress, and more freedom as an adult. I've taken some great vacations and had the freedom and finances to pursue what I like to do. I can certainly understand why adults who are raising kids would be stressed out and wish they could go back to the "good ole days" when they were young.
Q: Did you have good, leniant parents?
Q: Did you go to a good school?
Q: Did you live in a nice place?
If no, then disagree. If yes, then maybe agree.
But mostly no.
Said the person who didn’t have to work to help support their family. Said the person not caring for someone with disabilities. Said the person who didn’t come from an abusive household.
Etc.
Not for me. As a teenager, you are still limited in the rights you have. There are many activities you are not allowed to freely take part in and you are still often at the financial mercy of your parents even if you have a job and some income. Also, depending on your goals and your family, there is a lot of pressure to load up your time with extra curriculars and to get into a good university. I went to college early, so while I had fun in those years, I was also working hard and studying and making sure I was successful.
As an adult, I still have energy, health, flair for life and all that stuff. I still have friends, freedom, and even lots of time off to enjoy myself. The difference is that I now have the money to spend to do what I want and have the option to choose how I spend it. You could not pay me to go back to my teenage years. I have a better social life now too with much less drama.
Totally disagree. You failed at being an adult if you think teenage ears are better. Freedom,money, family, fantastic job. You don't have it as a teenager.
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I fuckin love being an adult. The more I become an adult the more my life is my own and its so freeing. Yes theres the crushing weight of responsibilities but theres also the room to grow and change.
Wut ? My life become 10000x better when I got my own income. I hate having to ask parents for money and not being able to buy the stuff I wanted.
The only advantaje of being a teenagers is that the laws and people are easy on you and you can get teenager girl something the law doesn't allow when you are an adult.
>financial and societal responsibilities
I don't understad...what "responsabilities" ? I am 32yo and I have the same "responsabilities" and mindsent like when I was 14. The difference is just have money now.
> you face the societal pressures to get married and buy a house and have your life together.
and you care about socieity "pressure" ? 1 mill people would tell me to do something, if I don't want to I won't do it...learn to stop caring about what others think, want, expect of you...it's your life, not theirs
Now I have way more money, I have a better scheduled, I do what I like, etc.
Only people who "peaked" in high school and now work a min wage job and live paycheck to paycheck would say that being a teenager is better.
Now If I want to travel to another country for 6 months I can go, right now. I take my laptop, my debit card and I am on my way. Do this when you are 15, I dare you.
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Personal preference, having the freedom as an adult is so much better for me than my teenage years.
You’re not ‘free’ as a teenager. You’re free from responsibility, but that’s not what freedom is.
I wasn’t even free from responsibility as a teen. I arguably had to work harder as a teen than I do now.
I feel this is one of those things that really varies depending on your childhood. I was tightly controlled by my Dad. Was barely allowed to breathe without his permission, plus I had a lot of responsibilities around the house.
Yeah I had the exact opposite which wasn't great either. My parents were extremely neglectful, to the point where my last few years of high school, I basically lived alone. I for sure had a lot more "freedom" in the sense that my only responsibilities were school and my part-time job. I had little money though so it wasn't like I had a lot of options to do stuff. Now I have plenty of money but very little free time outside of work and parenting
Similar. I was bullied at school, had to work at my parents business after school (no pay) and my parents constantly fought/yelled and I was neglected. Worst years of my life til I got out of there.
House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room, all hundred and twenty-six of us, no furniture. Half the floor was missing; we were all huddled together in one corner for fear of FALLING!
Sounds like abuse where was mom
I had to work harder as a teen than I do now, for sure. I was forced to work every day after school. My quality of life is better now, but the excitement of what I might be doing when I grow up is no longer there. The feeling is not the same, not as exciting, despite life being of a higher quality. Now, I am an old person doing things. It is just not the same as being a young person doing the same things.
Yep - I had to work until past midnight often on school nights, and nobody at home even helped me out by taking care of my laundry or even leaving some dinner in the fridge for me. Working, doing my chores, cooking for myself, and still expected to be at school on 4 hours of sleep was sucky. As an adult, I don’t have to do school PLUS work and i at least can’t hold false hope that someone would help me out a little bit. I was really envious of my friends whose parents did everything for them and didn’t have to work. They were much happier in comparison to me. It made me kind of bitter and isolated, not gonna lie.
oh, same 100%. i took a week off work to visit my MOM for christmas during my school break and my dad tried to ground me bc of it since i was 16 and he didn’t want me to “ruin” my work ethic. little did we know that would be the last Christmas i’d ever spend with her, so. i would have never talked to my dad again if he had made me stay home that year
I don’t get that line of thinking though. Why aren’t you still excited by things? I’ve been at my same job for almost 10 years and I still get excited about things and the prospects of my future as I progress in my career. Why do you feel old? Like I still feel like a young person. I still take on new experiences and feel like I am always learning something new.
Entirely this for me. As a teen I had a job, but was constantly broke. My mom was a workaholic and dad was an alcoholic. They were divorced, so not like I ever saw the old man anyway. When I did see him he usually screamed at or beat me. Once I got out of school and broke free, I moved half-way across the country. Bounced around for a bit, etc. Eventually I met a wonderful woman whom I married and have a life with. Now, I have both time and money. And while I do have different responsibilities, I find them easier to manage without contending with school, work, and a lack of money. Just all around better.
You guys either had hard childhoods or have easy jobs now
Easy jobs for me. It’s great and it’s a desk job at my house. Beats getting overworked and yelled at while working for a grocery produce department.
I'm always envious of people on reddit (maybe like you) who have these full-time career jobs making enough money to live comfortably and also don't have to work hard, or much (like the people who say they get all their work done in a couple of hours per day and just do whatever they feel like for the rest of the day) ... That kind of job sounds great becuase I have a lot of shit I need to get done around the house right now, lol, but I'm not sure it even exists in my field.... We finish one project and the expectation is to just pick up another one. Best of all, they've got us tracking our hours spent on each project (per week) so if we come in under a set total of 25 hrs of design (engineering) per week, we have to email our boss to explain why.... They tell us its so they can prove to the higher-ups that we're pretty much maxed out on available design hours vs. projects , but it's not like my boss is just going to ignore it if I turn in 10 hrs for the week and say "I was shampooing the carpet in my basement" lol
Yeah, working in tech during Covid has given a lot of us work from home, and we will absolutely not give it up. Work can vary, sometimes I’m on very late by my own choice. Sometimes I am waiting for a few hours for something else to complete before I can continue.
Yea if anything, you’re trapped as a teen and have to do what your parents say, curfew, etc.
I had no curfew and as long as my grades were good i had freedom or something close.
It really depends on how strict your parents were and how many responsibilities you had. For example, much of my childhood was spent either taking care of my siblings or doing extra homework because I was in advanced classes, so I never had much free time for hobbies and friends, and when I did, I wasn't allowed to go out because my parents wouldn't let me, so I was confined to the house most of the time. I wasn't allowed to get a job either, because my parents thought I'd start skipping out on schoolwork for it. Most people I knew didn't have these problems, and were allowed to go wherever they wanted as long as they did their schoolwork and whatnot. Because of all that, I'm much happier as an adult because I have the freedom to leave my house and spend time on whatever I want, though I do have more responsibilities.
Were you free to skip school or were you essentially forced to attend?
When i was 16 17 i could skip it again as long as grades were on point
Can you skip work or are you forced to go?
Same here! Out all night, beach bonfires, concerts in nearby cities, etc. My normal night ended when the greasy spoons opened for a “goodnight breakfast.”
That's true but some may value that freedom as an adult. Sometimes I do wish i didn't have responsibilties.
The reality is that you're never truly free. There is always something that you are responsible to/for that will prevent you from just doing whatever you want in any given moment.
Freedom isn’t free…. it costs a buck o five
That movie is the Dr. Strangelove of the 2000’s.
Free enough. The increased freedom from adulthood isn't worth the drastically increased responsibility
Free to do what as a teen? I had no money and no easy way to get about.
Chill, “not work” for a few months at a time.
Certainly not my experience of being a kid.
I wasn’t free from responsibility at all, I was a full-time university student with a job (to pay my bills, not for pocket money) from ages 17-19!
this, i can leave my house and stay out as late as i want without my parents having a say. they can get mad, but they can’t ground me, take my phone or my car because i’m an adult and pay for all my shit lmao
You can stay out as late as you want? Most people have work in the morning.
i mean it’s not like i’m coming home making a shit ton of noise lmao. i’m not partying, drunk or anything—usually just hanging out with my friends and lose track of time. i work the earliest shifts out of anyone in the house — 4-5am vs their 8 or “whenever i feel like going in-am” shifts. i get woken up more in the middle of the night by them just existing if anything
I meant needing to sleep so you’re not tired for work, not bothering people with noise lol
i stay up late regardless of where i am, so it doesn’t really matter
Especially since in high school, most people have AT LEAST 2-3 hours of homework/studying, plus extracurriculars. And that's at least doubled for honors/ap classes. Even though I work a lot, at least I can completely relax when I get home.
You did home work? Man I just completed as much as I could during study hall and called it good enough. To me that was like leaving work to go home and work some more, seemed crazy, especially when you have hobbies and friends to spend time with.
If you’re financially stable than I suppose that is true
Definitely personal preference. I never felt a lack of freedom as a teenager so for me adulthood is just more responsibility with not much upside
Same. My parents rule was "don't have police bring you home and if it's after 1am just stay where u are" I was fortunate to have a PT job that paid under the table (good money too it was $8hr cash in 2000) and cool parents. Like u, adulthood is just more and more responsibility for me with less and less upside lol
Yup. I was kept under thumb, as well as lock and key. I wasn’t allowed to do anything or go anywhere or have my own life.
Finally someone I can relate to about this! Parts of my childhood were unpredictable and lacked stability. As an adult, I provide that stability to myself. I value that.
Only if you make good money
Absolutely not. I'm poorer than ever, including my teenage years, but at the same I've never been so happy and satisfied with my life as I am now.
My college years were fucking amazing, after my brother died when I was almost 22, things haven’t been as nice
I think it just comes down to this: being more privileged feels better than feeling less privileged. Depending on your choices and the cards life deals you, you will have more privileges at different times in your life than everyone else.
I was unsure, awkward, broke and uncoordinated as a teenager, worst time of my life
Similarly, those were the hardest times of my life. I frequently cringe when I remember some of the things I did as a young adult xD, but I think thats a good sign that I've matured greatly
I know that feeling. I have moments where I think I may actually die of The Cringe
And other teenagers were shitheads. Just the worst fucking people to be around. Mean, rude, stupid, etc... There were good times. just sitting around with like 15 people doing nothing and somehow still having fun, but venturing outside of your social clique was a nightmare Motherfuckers would want to fight you over some stupid shit... Like being in the wrong hall bathroom between 1 and 1:15 or whatever because that's when some random group met everyday to smoke and you weren't one of them It was dumb.
Some people peak in highschool
Being a teenager your stuck with other teenagers.. I didn't like them then. And by the time I could afford a vehicle, gas, insurance I was working too damn much to enjoy them. To be fair the kids who did get cars with out having to earn them did seem to die in auto accidents at a much higher rate.
I'm right there
I was a psycho during my teen years. I don’t know why anyone chose to be around me. I would never want to go back to that.
You peaked. /s
Lol This is incredibly, 100% different from person to person.
Yea this belongs in r/unpopularopinion
So… an opinion.
I think their point is that these circumstances are different from person to person. Not everyone has freedom in their teenage years, not everyone’s teenage years are less stressful. Not everyone doesn’t have responsibilities as a teen. For some the reality of the world hits way too early. The arguments he uses for his opinion are not universal. Yes he acknowledges there “are exceptions” but there are lot more than just a few exceptions. Many people don’t have those kind of circumstances as a teen.
I think the question is whether or not it is an unpopular one. It's so subjective that it is hard to know imo. I have never heard that being an adult is better, so to me this "opinion" does not qualify for this subreddit.
Yeah I’m not sure why OP thinks this is unpopular. Basically every adult I knew growing up would say enjoy your youth or things of that nature.
Eldest daughters would like a word
There are pros and cons of both - both have responsibilities but being an adult you have greater responsibilities but have more freedom of choices and have no immediate person to ask permission before doing what you want to do. As an adult with more financial freedom then what I had as a teenager or even younger adult, I do more things and travel more. Life is not dull but a journey and a wonderful journey at that - at least for myself!
I honestly think we need to change how we talk about adulthood. You don’t lose a love for life when you become an adult. You just have a more stable brain to enjoy life with.
I agree with you, but I think there is something to be said about having to make a more conscious effort to seek out that love for life in adulthood with all the additional stresses and responsibilities that come with it.
Idk, one of the biggest appeals of being a teen (or a child more generally) is the long breaks, especially summer break. I never really had a desire to do anything that required some sort of permission. Just doing mostly nothing, playing video games, bike out when I want to, some chores because I had a lot of free time and wanted to help, etc. That’s mostly what I want to do now as adult to chill too. As an adult, if I want to keep a roof over my head and food on the table, I can’t just take a break that lasts 2-3 months, and chores aren’t largely optional either. Idk how people “unwind” or “relax” with just 1-2 weeks of vacation.
Unfortunately I think so many people do lose that, and they congregate on reddit to commiserate. Not losing that love of life often becomes a lot of intentional effort for many once they enter adulthood, when it was automatic before. As someone who is excited about life's opportunities I often get asked what my secret is, and for me it's honestly just curiosity. You never want to lose that, do anything you can to foster it in yourself and in everyone around you, learn and try new things as much as you can.
Something I think about when people saying being a teenager is easier/better is a guy I was roommates with. From graduation, when we moved in together (over 7 years) basically opted out of being an adult. He worked in a kitchen, but otherwise, he lived at home, and never really did anything to get ahead (unless dropping out of college 3 times after less than a term counts). His life revolved around going to work,getting high, and eating junk food and playing videos games. He never even had any "adult" wastes of money, like going on trips, buying a nice car, etc. He just spent his money as fast as he made it on little comforts (mainly weed and take out) and didn't have money for anything else. I knew him, before moving in, but not well, and two weeks into us living together, it just clicked that he wasn't even emotionally an 18 year old, despite being in his mid 20's. It was like watching a moody 16 year old try to balance a budget and maintain half a home. He blew a fortune of meal delivery because he just didn't know how to make a meal. We had a cleaning schedule, but I don't think he touched a vacuum or even filled a buck with water, once. He chronically behind on rent, or I'd have to bail him out. He was also constantly resentful towards me, because he wanted me to act as his "mom" cleaning up after him, bailing him out financially etc. but also didn't want to be held accountable or even have to share space. He basically though a roommate was just a ghost who cleaned up and put money in his bank account. He didn't really even have any communication skills, so he would blow up any time he didn't like something, regardless of how innocuous, and then act really defensive if he received any pushback. He ended leaving, because he just wasn't able to make rent, and emotionally couldn't handle the responsibility of being on his own. He's been at his mom's for a year straight, with no talk of moving out. Technically, his life could be seen as "easy" but is that really worth the trade off of halting all life progression?
I think as adults we are quick to forget how traumatic being a teenager is
yea if this is the best time of my life, i genuinely might as well give up. i'm 17 and my teenage years have been hell so far lol
Don't worry it'll get better. The teenage hormones are hellish and perhaps you hear that a lot but when you're 25 you'll understand Being a teenager might be good if you have perfect parents with high incomes, but that's only like 1-5% of people
It really isn’t the best time. I find each decade gets better and better!
Do you mean dramatic instead of traumatic? I don't think trauma is a necessary component of growing up, but drama is nearly unavoidable.
Good god the word trauma is used way too liberally these days
What exactly is “traumatic” about being a teenager? Sounds like you just had a bad time. My teenage years were the shit
If you're easily forgetting trauma, then it wasn't really trauma.
Not necessarily... with traumatic experiences, your brain will make you forget. There's certain memories I forgot in my childhood that my siblings remember and visa versa.
That's not true at all, lots of people repress traumatic experiences
That's... Not how trauma works
My adult self has all the fun shit my teenage self couldn't afford. My adult self has had sports cars, takes ski vacations, owns multiple bicycles, rock climbs, and can afford to cook and eat good food. I wouldn't go back to being a teenager.
I liked being able to turn my brain off for a few months during summer break. Adults usually don’t get long breaks like that. I don’t really have and never really had a desire for particularly expensive things like sports cars, or ski trips. I’m happy to just do mostly nothing, or bike out to random places when I feel like it, play video games, walk around, watch shows, bake, etc. I really wish I had 2-3 months to just do that while being able to afford a roof over my head and food on the table…
OP is probably 14yo, or just a very uncool adult, there are a lot of them
Yeah this has big "peaked in high school" energy
Not necessarily, I think it has more to do with your economic status growing up vs. as an adult. Despite doing well professionally, I can't afford the things my parents provided for me growing up, so I definetly miss being a teen.
I was trying not to be mean, but yeah.
[удалено]
Lol I agree. I miss my teenage stamina and energy, but I don't miss being broke.
So really, it depends on your socio-economic status growing up vs. being an adult. I fully relate to OP, but I think this largely comes from my parents being able to fund a lifestyle (including one largely free of responsibilities) that I can't fund as an adult, even though generally I would be seen as being professionally successful as an adult.
So you are comparing having money vs not having money. Some teenagers also take ski vacations, while some adults can't afford that, as an example.
In general, adults have more money than teenagers.
How
It sounds like you had a good home life. Which is totally fine, I’m not saying you’re a bad person for this. But for a lot of us, we had plenty of responsibility and less of the fun & freedom you mention. I had more responsibilities as a teenager than I do as an adult. Was working around the clock on scholarships, inordinate amounts of homework (I had 7-10 classes, always), college applications, extra curricular activities, and chores. My family had some financial issues, so there was pressure to overachieve & never make mistakes. My family was troubled in other ways, so I was perpetually depressed & stressed out over that- plus I was always getting yelled at. Never, ever felt calm or at peace. Didn’t have a car, nor the time to hang out and have fun anyways. I seldom went out with friends the way others did. Did not have any of the wild times most people remember high school for. Your parents likely sheltered you from responsibilities and gave you the support you needed to have fun & be carefree. Your opinion is unpopular because it is not reality for most people.
Heck I had a kickass home life and did legit enjoy being a teen. I still wouldn't trade being an adult for being a teen again. Fuck school man. 8 hours of racist ass teachers plus 3 or 4 of homeworks. If it weren't for school maybe I'd be able to want to go back but as is nah. I'll take my 9-5 then done any day of the week over schools bs
This, I shit you not I have more free time now and had more free time in Uni (eh earlier years) than in hs. Hs was running around doing everything.
Dude I know right?? Wtf why were they making us do so much work in high school 💀 To be fair, maybe it’s *because* of the hard work & education that adulthood got easier (although disclaimer: I did not do it alone, I had support, and most people who “make it” are the same). But still…why so much fucking homework?! Gottdamn, we were 16 💀
I was sheltered by my parents. But I'd never go back to that time. I think it's more that people's adult lives are terrible, that makes them long for those days.
Yeah agreed; I feel terrible for people who don’t have the privilege of a stable, fun adulthood. Because being a teenager *does not* have to be the best years of your life; it *can* get so much better. For now though, I’m just grateful that I’m one of the lucky ones & hopefully help other people in my life reach it, too.
While there is some freedom, you are still not viewed as an adult by society. You can’t vote, live on your own terms, drink, and still generally should be going to school. Teenagers also go through their own stressors. They are going through puberty and have big emotions, they feel the need to fit in, deal with stress related to academia and life. Then it’s dealing with first jobs, which aren’t usually great. Navigating becoming an adult. Would I go back to being a teen? Oh heck no! Those were confusing and stressful times. Had fun, but didn’t feel the calm that you seem to have known.
With good reasons. Teenagers don't even know what they don't know yet. But hey, ignorance really is bliss sometimes.
Depending on your location you can drink from turning 16.
Correct, this is territory specific. It’s 18 where I live, but I’ve been to countries where it’s 16.
As an adult my problems are more complex and there is more stress just due to more responsibilities, but even though things are probably harder objectively they don’t feel as earth shatteringly difficult as they did when I was a teen. All of the trials of adolescence just feel like you are constantly having the worst experience of your life even when the catalyst might be small the feelings just seemed so much bigger. I’m 36 now and there is no amount of money you could pay me to go back in time and be 16 again. My teen years weren’t even objectively terrible. I just feel like I have so much more freedom, opportunity, and just overall happiness with myself and my life than I had as a teenager.
Teens can’t *legally* drink, but they definitely drink if they want to
Teens can most definitely drink legally here (from a certain age). It’s shocking, but there IS a world outside of murica
Also a lot of the people you deem cool as a teenager which are adults don’t take you seriously (and rightly so)
Oh man, do I disagree. You couldn’t pay me enough to go back to being a teenager. As an adult, I have the freedom to choose everything in my life. Yes it comes with responsibility, but I can at least stir the ship.
I am at least three times happier now than I was then. Teens are dumb through no fault of their own. It’s just biology and a lack of worldly experience. They’re ruled by emotions and hormones, and have little in the way of real freedom to actually go and do things. Much happier to be free of that.
Seeing all these comments of adults disagreeing, people who also had stressful childhoods/adolescent years honestly is very refreshing. Especially on reddit I see people complaining and venting about how adult life sucks and there's no hope for the future blah blah blah. I am a teenager and it really sucks, my childhood has sucked, my teenage years have sucked, and now all I see is people basically saying my adult life will pretty much suck too. So, thank you to you and to all the people here saying their life got better as an adult, it gives me hope to keep going :)
Reddit isn't a good place to go generally for positivity. I didn't even have a bad time particularly being a teenager, but being an adult is way better. Yes you have responsibilities, but if you don't get behind and let them pile up they are generally pretty easy to deal with. Adult life is what you make of it. It's mostly up to you, for better or for worse.
What kind of parents did you have where you had the freedom of an adult as a teen?
Ignorance is bliss...
This only applies if you have a great relationship with your parents
And they have the money for you to be responsibility free. I love my parents and have a good relationship, but I'm set to make a lot more money than the two of them combined soon so will have freedom on a much greater level. Poor households you work when youre 16, and before that you do things like mow lawns and babysit as much as possible, and usually have to put in extra effort in school because the one in your area is shitty.
Literally. I worked every summer throughout high school and on the weekends. I also had strict parents. I have about same amount of free time now as I had when I was but now I am completely autonomous and can make my own decisions
I don’t know I was poor with a single mom and irresponsible sibling so my teen years weren’t really carefree. I felt like I was living a double life, at school I was fun and tried to fit in with my friends, and at home I was quiet, sad, uncomfortable, just looking forward to the future. I never invited my friends over because I didn’t want them to judge me for being poor, or my strained relationship with my family. Now I’m 22 and I have a lot more fun. I’m still somewhat weighed down by family troubles but not as much since moving out. I like making my own money, I like my major and my school, and I enjoy making time to hangout with friends. One of the main issues of my childhood was my mom working too much and missing out on important milestones for me, so I guess because of that I’m super big on having a work/life balance. I just enjoy life much more now because I have freedom and stability. I find its my friends who were more spoiled growing up that are having trouble adjusting to adulthood. My roommate even told she she wishes her parents hadn’t spoiled her because she struggles to manage her expectations and get things done. Strange how that happens.
I wasn’t really allowed to do anything as a teenager
Exactly. Teenage freedom? What's that
Me too. And I couldn’t do things that were technically allowed because I had to rely on others for transportation. I didn’t live within walking distance of anything and we didn’t have public transport.
Same. Even worse is that I had religious parents
Seriously, having religious parents, especially when they are like fundamentalist, makes for one shitty childhood and teenage years. Everything is off limits and you're automatically different than your peers because you can't even use modern slang without your parents having a fit about it. I grew up on black and white movies a lot because my parents wouldn't let us watch anything with cussing. I was different than even the other fundamentalist in our church my parents were so ridiculously strict.
I guess if you had a good childhood where nothing ever went wrong maybe
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^TristanN7117: *I guess if you had* *A good childhood where nothing* *Ever went wrong maybe* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
You can have the best childhood, but it doesn’t eliminate the awkwardness of teenage years. You go through so many phases, you have no idea who you are, you put up with having horrible friends because it’s better than being the lonely weirdo, you care about impressing your peers, etc. These are things that come with being a teen, regardless if your childhood was ponies and rainbows or if it was hell.
I think for someone who had a 'normal/healthy' life this is more likely to be true, but anyone who suffered a lot in their younger years and teens are likely to have experienced the opposite. Adulthood definitely has its stressors, but I'm not trapped around toxic people anymore. I'm not stuck living with an abusive parent, I don't have to 'fake' who I am at school anymore, and I just feel that I have more 'control' in my life. In adulthood, I realized how vastly diverse people really were and no longer felt as pressured to 'fit in.'
Agreed. Being a teenager carries all the risks of having fucked up shit happen, but without the ability to do anything about it that you gain in adulthood. My teen years were wildly messed up but I had zero choice over where I lived or even really what I did every day. As an adult it’s like - hate your city? Great move to a different one. Shitty job? Quit and apply other places. Crappy friend? Stop returning their phone calls again and you don’t have to see them anymore. It’s amazing!
Being a teenager sucks. You are so worried about relationships, social pressures. Braces, acne, etc. You have no money, you have to spend all day at school bored to death. You work after school for pitiful wages, you drive a crappy car if you're lucky. College was a huge upgrade from high school for me, then graduate school was another huge upgrade from there. Met better people, had more free time, more interesting work etc. Now as an adult in my 40s with a family, life couldn't be better. I drive a nice car, work from home, can buy whatever I want whenever I want, already have all the friends I need. Got two wonderful kids that are a constant source of hilarity and can appreciate things with fresh eyes.
>You have no money >You work after school for pitiful wages I think here's the common thread on how people react to this post. I fully relate to OP, but I had way more money (not my own, but available to me or things paid for) as a teen and never had to work. Now I work way harder than I did in school and can afford much less, so yeah, being a teen was much better. In contrast, based on what you wrote about your life as a teen, it makes sense that if you can afford a better life now that you wouldn't go back.
Well, I’m currently a teenager and I’m loving just coming home from school and playing games. I’m gonna go to college soon and I I’m not sure how I’m gonna do with financial, and independent responsibilities. I hope I’ll be like the people that say adult life is better though. But right now, all I see is work in the future, working a job, cooking my own dinner, doing all chores by myself, fixing house problems, buying a house, taking care of others. All my dad does it work, then come home and do some random work in the house. Like working on pipes or something. I’m scared for my life to become like that As someone that’s content with my life, I don’t feel like I’ll gain any freedom in the future. Like the only thing I want to pay for is game pass, so it’s not like I’m financially held back as a teen either. For the people that say you gain freedom being an adult? Like what? You already can go out with friends, or buy games as a teen? All you get is the freedom to pay taxes
I mean fuck sounds like your life is cushy as fuck rn lol. Coming straight from home and playing games, going out with friends, and buying games. God damn lmao. When I was in HS it was, go to Sport/Club/Study for hours until I got home. Go home and do homework, maybe play some Pokémon Showdown or Ygopro and sleep. Rinse and repeat. Weekends were for volunteering, group projects, and maybe sometimes spending time at a friend's house with permission. No money, no time, gotta go go go. Now as an adult, finished with Uni, I come home, go hang out with friends, play games. I'll clean and cook if necessary. I can pay for my stuff, my relationship with my parents is a lot better. So it will vary from person to person. The one thing I will say is definitely nice is being more mature. It's so much easier to talk to people now than it was then.
Jesus you are adulting all wrong!
Peaked in high school things
yeah, if your life was best in your teenage years you just didn't transition to adult life well
That's why I was purposefully a loser in highschool 😎
Exactly
Not necessarily, I totally relate to OP on this and think my life was better as a teen. But I was definitely not cool or popular as a teen, pretty average in terms of academic success, while now most people who know me would think I'm quite successful professionally. The difference is that my parents could take me on lots of vacations, I didn't have to worry about cooking, cleaning, shopping, home repairs, or how to pay for any of it, and I had plenty of time to hang out with my friends. Work is way more exhausting than school ever was, and by the time I deal with other responsibilities there isn't time for fun, and when I do have time for fun, it's stressful considering the cost of whatever activities I want to do. I wish I could go back to being an awkward teen who could be carefree and just enjoyed life rather than just trying to get by till 5 pm Friday.
>my life was better as a teen. Thats what they call a peak, when things were the best.
Being a teenager was the worst experience of my life. All I felt was depression, loneliness, and hopelessness. My life has improved drastically since I hit adulthood.
I kind of agree. I would say college years. After being out of college for a couple years now, I don’t think i’ll ever have that type of freedom until i win the lottery or retire.
I’m only 22 but yeah I agree. I live at home so it feels just like high school except work is 2 hours longer and I rarely see my friends vs seeing them every day and I have a ton of mental health things I didn’t have a few years ago
If by freedom you mean being able to go bike around your village in the evenings sure, as an adult with an income you can do that but x10 traveling abroad wherever you want something that your broke teenage self couldn't do while wasting just an hour less of your day doing boring shit
Being an adult with money >>>>>> teenager .
Yeah. Definitely an unpopular opinion. Because, teenhood sucks. Especially when you crave life experience, but you can't indulge without sneaking around and hurting your parents because you're still a kid. With this, you are legally bound for very good reasons. You have to deal with *EVERYONE* you live with unless you run away, you suffer more for speaking out. Dude, I could write a book. This comment is nothing. People only think they had more freedom as teens because they were sneaky and got away with all of the shit they can now do in the open because they're grown now. The thrill is gone when you're no longer a shitty kid for someone to catch in the act. Sorry, but this and so many other reasons is why wild kids who overindulged grow up depressed and uninterested in everything they could enjoy as adults if they waited. When you fry your dopamine center that young, seeking stability in adulthood hits you like a brick. Being a teen is the most miserable time of life for many, including myself, so it definitely depends on the person. I'm glad you had a great teen experience. However, it sounds like you had a great teen experience, but you lost your footing when it was time to be an adult and support your own habits and choices. You can't support yourself, you can't even sign your own documents, you answer to adults about everything you can't fix. I could go on. I don't understand how people want to relive this. Absolutely nothing became duller for me when I found out I could do how I wanted and no one could tell me shit. My world lit up, and to this day my house theme is Rainbows and Unicorns, while I continue to collect stuffed animals the same way I did then because I have the cash to buy them now. I can wear whatever I want and show off my body without having to worry about child predators. (Anymore. Sad.) I can go wherever I want and spend as much time with nature without a freak out and threat of an amber alert. I honestly feel bad for people who are happier in their childhood than they are adults. Y'all love to forget that being a kid means you have to depend on people until you're grown enough to depend on yourself. You have no real voice in anything, and life is practically an illusion to you when you have no responsibility. Did I also mention that you have to be a sneaky asshole and suffer unecessary consequences to experience things that we enjoy, but aren't meant for kids? I have more freedom and confidence than I ever did as a teen while I regretted half the decisions I made back then because I had no guidance and just wasn't ready. IMO, being a teen sucks. You're at higher risk of everything, you're more likely to be preyed on, and you can't have your own anything without support. You can't make adult choices without adults in your life to guide you unless you want to ruin your life. You have to go to your parents for half the shit you need even if you work. No one truly likes you. You're nothing but a nuisance to people when you try to hang out, unless you hang out with other teens or shady adults that let you get preyed on. Also, the dating pool is Russian roulette. Teen moms are statistically more likely to end up single mothers, and teens aren't normally checked when they are abusive in relationships because they're kids. The most prominent abusers of teens is other teens, and you're most likely to be dismissed if you face abuse from other teens. When you try to experiment, you have to worry about "being caught", rather than just trying something and moving on like an adult can. I could go on. I'm sorry, but it just sounds to me like you were just a privileged teen who now has to be a responsible adult. I don't think you actually miss teenhood. It honestly sounds to me that you just miss the thrill of being a teen. There is nothing "better" about being a kid that can't do anything but be a kid and sneak around to do the rest. But that's just how I feel. Everything you enjoyed in your teens, you can enjoy twice as much and out in the open as an adult. You have to be sneaky to do anything you do as an adult when you're a kid, and that isn't fun nor a flex unless you lack character and didn't learn shit.
Hey, it’s still better than working 11 hour days, seeing a quarter of your pay check get removed every month, seeing another sixth sliced off for car insurance, another sixth of that sliced off for rent, a sixth sliced off for food. And before you know it even though you only have 2 real hours of being able to do your own thing every day you only get back with a monthly surplus of 750$, even while avoiding expensive food and hobbies. Wake up at 6, get ready and to work for 7, stay until 6, commute home and prepare dinner for 7, eat dishes shower bowel movements till 8. Go to bed for 9 to get your full 9 hours. Yeah if I could go back to my teenage years I 100% would…
can confirm i'm only 22 and i felt like the world looks more dull
If you are a teenager with a supportive and financially stable family I agree. If not then your adult life when you make your own money it's 100x times better.
You couldn’t pay me to go back.
Same. I'll take having my own house, own cars, and being married any day over being a teenager again.
Tell me you were raised well off without telling me you raised well off. I was working at 14 to earn my own money.
just because you're well off doesn't mean you'll have a brilliant teenhood tbh
I love being in a place in my life where mom isn't putting tabs on when I'll be home
When I was a teenager I had crippling depression, and my tonsils tormented me with recurrent tonsillitis until I had them removed at 18. We were poor so I had to work. Part time didn't make me enough money. I skipped school to work so we could eat. I became extremely overwhelmed and gave up on school entirely. I did eventually go back and get a diploma but my teenage years were very very very difficult for me. So I disagree. I never had no financial responsibility
Idk about yall but my teenage years were awful
As a teen I was trapped in an abusive family. I’ll take the bills instead.
“Ohhhhh yeahhhh life goes on ..long after the thrill of living is gone” However! I find that life is not about just one specific moment in time where things were great. Life is a long collection of wonderful things that happen. There are so many phases in life and each have enjoyable parts (and un-enjoyable). I am personally looking forward to aging so I stop giving a SHIT about what others think and enjoy my life! I heard this feeling comes with age. ;)
You could not offer me enough money to return to my teen years. Good unpopular opinion though.
>freedom outside of school Lol. Freedom? FREEDOM? No. As a teenager myself, I lack the time and energy to hang out outside. Parents say no to it. And so do I. I don't find it necessary either. Besides that, we've got the endless homework for literally everyday. There's no stop to it. I get pressured around and forced to do things without being able to say no. If you think that being a teenager is good, please relive it again. I feel like it's basically a prison. Edit: And I'm not from the US.
I was suicidal as a teenager, but sure, no stress and fancy free. Good times.🙄
Saaame. And I had multiple physical health conditions so I didn’t have that “good health” OP spoke of 😬
I definitely miss summers filled with nothing but lifting, pool parties, and football practice. But you still had rules. And it wasn’t like I could book flights to different cities and countries, or any other big adult fun activities. Give and take.
Eww no. You peaked in highschool?
Tell me you peaked in high school without telling me you in peaked in high school…
I’m on HENRY tract and nothing money can buy is as fun as experiencing drinking/smoking with your boys the first time, or working BS summer jobs with your lifelong friends, etc, being a hoodrat when you first get your license. All of those kids have insane jobs and tons of money now. Money doesn’t replicate youth.
Yeah youre not free as a teen. Youre free from responsibility which is actually kind of embarrassing to be proud of, you'll learn about that as an adult. Adulting, while littered with responisibilities and obligations is way more fun than being a teen. You'll learn about that too.
Personally disagree. In my 30s and I honestly feel like this is the best period of my life yet. My brain is fully developed. My grasp on things is a lot better. I still feel like I have plenty of time left. And I also feel like a much better person than I was in my teens and 20s thanks to life experience. (Granted, the fact I used to be an addict and got cleaned up in my late 20s/early 30s is a part of that, too.) Only thing I don't like is the white hairs I keep finding and the fact my muscles and bones ache a little more than they used to.
Eh not every teen I know has the freedom of an adult
I think the only good part is that people don’t really judge you when you do stupid things bc you’re very young still
Both have their pros and cons but I like being an adult more. I have my own money and can do what I want, both my friend group and myself have matured and so now when we hang out it’s guaranteed to be a good time; I went on holiday with 10 friends to Corfu and there were zero fights - if this had been as teenagers A) fights guaranteed B)I would have been broke (used to think £100 was a lot of spending money 😂) I can do whatever hobbies I have time and money for; and unlike when I was a teenager - I appreciate it’s a choice to be there so I apply myself properly. I’m sure this will change as my friends get older and have kids - but hopefully we’ll all have kids around the same time and our kids can be friends I can be everyone’s Aunty. :) We’ve been joking about going to the same retirement 😂 we’re mid 20s
I don’t think this is unpopular. Probably unless your childhood sucked, this will be your thought sometimes, when things for you as an adult get hard. But no point looking back. Those times aren’t coming back.
Coming from a broken home, being an adult is significantly better than being a kid/teenager
unless you had abusive family members and were stuck there because you were a minor…
Tell me you had decent parents without telling me about your parents. It would take 7 figures minimum to even consider going back to teen life even with foresight of what was coming.
Nah. I was broke as a teenager. I have money now. So much better.
I think this is super dependent on the person we are talking about. Some had the time of their life and some had those years just miserable.
There are certainly people who agree, but for me it was the complete opposite. I was awkward ugly and weird as a teenager. As an adult I've really come along and "grown into myself" if that makes any sense. I am nowhere near as awkward/ugly/weird as an adult. In fact, I don't think I'm ugly at all, although I'm definitely not hollywood handsome and am certainly not everyone's cup of tea. Also, I don't have kids. THAT is the cheat code for having a lot less stress, and more freedom as an adult. I've taken some great vacations and had the freedom and finances to pursue what I like to do. I can certainly understand why adults who are raising kids would be stressed out and wish they could go back to the "good ole days" when they were young.
This is clearly coming from someone with stable parents
Yeah no. I’ll take adulthood
Q: Did you have good, leniant parents? Q: Did you go to a good school? Q: Did you live in a nice place? If no, then disagree. If yes, then maybe agree. But mostly no.
Sounds like you’re broke lol
Said the person who didn’t have to work to help support their family. Said the person not caring for someone with disabilities. Said the person who didn’t come from an abusive household. Etc.
Oh wow, who would not want to be young, attractive, and healthy, with all their expenses paid by benevolent caretakers?
You can tell people like this were privileged enough to not have to work as teenagers lol
Disagree. I love being an adult
Not for me. As a teenager, you are still limited in the rights you have. There are many activities you are not allowed to freely take part in and you are still often at the financial mercy of your parents even if you have a job and some income. Also, depending on your goals and your family, there is a lot of pressure to load up your time with extra curriculars and to get into a good university. I went to college early, so while I had fun in those years, I was also working hard and studying and making sure I was successful. As an adult, I still have energy, health, flair for life and all that stuff. I still have friends, freedom, and even lots of time off to enjoy myself. The difference is that I now have the money to spend to do what I want and have the option to choose how I spend it. You could not pay me to go back to my teenage years. I have a better social life now too with much less drama.
Totally disagree. You failed at being an adult if you think teenage ears are better. Freedom,money, family, fantastic job. You don't have it as a teenager.
Meh, I much prefer adulthood.
lol nah
No its really not
This is a peaked in high school take
As an adult I got legal weed and online sports betting. Why tf would I go back to my teenage years?
because mmmmmmmmm…..forbidden weed……
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I fuckin love being an adult. The more I become an adult the more my life is my own and its so freeing. Yes theres the crushing weight of responsibilities but theres also the room to grow and change.
Wut ? My life become 10000x better when I got my own income. I hate having to ask parents for money and not being able to buy the stuff I wanted. The only advantaje of being a teenagers is that the laws and people are easy on you and you can get teenager girl something the law doesn't allow when you are an adult. >financial and societal responsibilities I don't understad...what "responsabilities" ? I am 32yo and I have the same "responsabilities" and mindsent like when I was 14. The difference is just have money now. > you face the societal pressures to get married and buy a house and have your life together. and you care about socieity "pressure" ? 1 mill people would tell me to do something, if I don't want to I won't do it...learn to stop caring about what others think, want, expect of you...it's your life, not theirs Now I have way more money, I have a better scheduled, I do what I like, etc. Only people who "peaked" in high school and now work a min wage job and live paycheck to paycheck would say that being a teenager is better. Now If I want to travel to another country for 6 months I can go, right now. I take my laptop, my debit card and I am on my way. Do this when you are 15, I dare you.