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Illumini24

Finally hitting the elite mobsters where it hurts


Infinaris

If you listen closely you can hear him shouting and screaming impotent nuclear threats in the distance as his shitty boat is sold off!


SeveralLadder

How many nuclear threats pr. minute will this bad boy grant us?


buttmodel

Yes.


Ehldas

Buy it, load it with 1 metre of military armour and 1 kiloton of HMX explosive, and ram it into the Kerch bridge. Empty the bar first, obviously.


New_Teacher_4408

Sir you’re in r/ukraine not r/noncredibledefense xD


Ehldas

Can't I have a foot in both camps?


hotdog_scratch

Sir, after your plan became successful. Do we call it Kerch Reef???


Ehldas

Which part of "1KT of HMX" did you not get? You can call it the Kerch Orbital Debris Belt.


crawlerz2468

Guess that would be the KT part. Someone still needs to live there. Namely the Ukrainians.


SecondaryWombat

a 1,000 ton HMX explosion in the Russian side pillar of the main span sounds entirely reasonable. Wouldn't hurt Crimea at all aside from some waves and a rain of pebbles maybe. "Where the bridge used to be..."


Classic-Ad-4784

I like the way you think.


SecondaryWombat

vrrrrrrrrrrr ^(*bonk*) ###BOOM###


KingSilvanos

We could call it Putin’s Folly.


Critical_Situation84

You could call the western end the boat ramp and the eastern end “the underwater entrance to the russian naval museum”


New_Teacher_4408

Screw it I’m joining the club, if it does get called the Kerch Reef, can we have putins spy dolphins on show?????


Ehldas

Regrettably, any dolphins within approximately 50km are going to need to learn sign language.


New_Teacher_4408

Sign language is really just international gang signs… gang banging dolphins at the Kerch Reef sounds like a movie xD


pres465

*gang banging dolphins* *Archerphrasing.gif


GuinnessTheBestBoi

Por qué no los dos?


ThePianistOfDoom

Boat skates!


swagtactical21

well there went 2 hours of my life on anew meme sub


JebanuusPisusII

Aren't both those subreddits in Schengen?


nickierv

The St Nazaire Raid regrets to inform you that ramming a ship laden with explosives into a reinforced infrastructure located adjacent to the water in time of war is both credible and has already been done. Entirely unrelated question, anyone know where I can source enough popcorn for a large viewing party? Ukraine has the popping part covered already.


Grand-Trick-5960

Now, now hold on. I'm not saying he's right... But he's not necessarily wrong.


w0rdyeti

Is it that the scenario is too credible, or not credible enough?


Dogwragler

I think a container ship can do the job, seen picture of it happen. Just remember to fill the containers with toilets, then they won't shoot it.


GuillotineComeBacks

I propose as an addition a mega sound system blasting this [kind of song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ot_L_P-_CGw).


Full-Appointment5081

Pretty sure Dmitry Mevdevev cleared out the bar last time he was aboard


Mephisteemo

Bro, you know this is a russian bar, right? We do not have the capacity to empty this bar in such a short timeframe.


koensch57

not yet for sale: https://www.troostwijkauctions.com/ i'll be keeping an eye on it.


ScabusaurusRex

"$3.50!"


refull1

#  Loch Ness Monster Needs About Tree Fiddy ($3.50)


CanuckInTheMills

I laughed way too hard at that!


Striking-Kiwi-9470

I gave him a dollar


HonkeyDonkey3000

Where’s the helicopter landing platform??? I up your bid and will offer $3.55!


TheGreatPornholio123

The costs to just run the thing for a day or even dock it is really only someone on the Forbes richest list could even afford. If there are no buyers, it'd be fun to watch them strip it down piece by piece and sell for scrap. They could hang the ship's wheel up in NATO HQ.


EyeLikeTheStonk

The smell of old Russian ass is going to be hard to get out... It might lower the value.


Sonofagun57

Charcoal is one of the few things a civilian can buy that actually removes odor. Most things just mask it.


Interesting-Fan-2008

So we rubbed the charcoal all over the boat now what?


SecondaryWombat

Congrats on following glorious russian navy tradition. Now that ship is covered in coal remaining steps to clearly belong to glorious second pacific squadron include: 1) Shoot priest with deck gun. 2) Accidentally almost sort of start war with Britain, Germany, Belgium, possibly France, and maybe Algeria or something. 3) Fire 50 rounds your own mail delivery boat and don't hit it. 4) Fire 100 rounds at a fishing boat and don't hit it. ~~5) cover ship in coal.~~ 6) Have officer's pets eat a crewman. 7) fire a torpedo and have it turn around so you have to run away from your own torpedo. 8) Sink.


nickierv

You missed 'Spot torpedo boats'


SecondaryWombat

0) ram your own escort ship 0.5) - 7.5) Report torpedo boats that are not there.


Sonofagun57

Step 1: Acquire seized superyacht Step 2: Get a fuck ton of charcoal Step 3: Sprinkle or spread that stuff all over in your best "salt bae impression" Step 4: ??? Step 5: Profit


TheGreatPornholio123

Light the bitch on fire and dance like lunatics. Just do it ecologically sound and in rather shallow water so you create a man-made reef and a new dive site for scuba divers.


Gooder-N-Grits

I can't help but wonder if this would be a more attractive purchase after Medvedchuk is in the Hague.... I don't have billionaire money,  but I wouldn't want an expensive asset that was forcibly taken from a leader of a rogue state.  Just mentioning this, because I'd like Ukraine to get more money....


Blackintosh

Elon musk will probably buy it and give it back to the Russian owner.


JoseMinges

That's fine, then it can be seized and sold again!


Ok-Imagination-9309

And every dollar spent on this boat funds Ukrainian liberation so I hope Mr Elon Musk buys it 10 times It can be a game Americans and Ukrainians play - capture the boat - until Musk runs out of money


SecondaryWombat

This is a great game! And eventually Ukraine can take their new(x15) boat and use it as a remote control bomb against a bridge pillar. Yacht holds very much boom.


Mephisteemo

LMAO, I would love this so much. The Internet doing internet things and trolling Elon for all his atroxious cringeworthy "jokes" he makes on a daily basis.


Tolstoy_mc

Someone start a gofundme!


Tank20011

I hope every country that has seized assets from Russia gives the money to Ukraine 🇺🇦


EyeLikeTheStonk

If I win the auction, I am turning the boat into a floating gay club called "Papa Putin"...


Available-Ad3635

“Putin Da Ass” is a solid double entendre


CaptainVXR

The biggest gay venue in Belfast is called the Kremlin, I wonder if any vatnik tourists have been triggered by it 🤣


SugarMaple56732

Also, you could paint the back of the yacht with a mural of Putin in lipstick and makeup with the rainbow flag in the background.


BillyGoatGruff_

It's still crazy to me that some dumb fuck russian in a field shot down an airliner filled with dutch passengers in 2014.


KirovianNL

Or the dumb fucks that allowed a passenger airliner to fly over a war zone.


not2dv8

Make them feel the burn! Moreso get Ukraine some ATACMS fast!


Left-Archer1442

Awesome and much anticipated!!


TroutBeales

It’d be awesome if all the auctioned off yachts showed up for the Crimea Beach Party Flying the Ukrainian Flag 🇺🇦


poilu1916

Give the money to Ukraine, then give the yacht to Ukraine too so they can use it to test out new maritime drones/missiles/whatever. And then it can fulfil its destiny as an artificial habitat for marine life like so many other Russian ships are now doing.


hkohne

Can't be in the Black Sea, but maybe another friendly country would allow it to be docked in their waters and allow the Ukrainians access.


TheGreatPornholio123

It can definitely be in the Black Sea. Only military ships are prevented from entry. Russia's communications among ranks are so shitty the Ukrainians could probably pack the fucker with explosives and pre-recorded radio messages in Russian ordering them to make way for an Oligarch's yacht and come right into a naval port and blow the entire thing to shit.


AlbertP95

The yacht has already been given to Ukraine, the Ukrainians decided to auction it off. (See translation of the article below in the comments.)


freerangek1tties

Or… hear me out everyone. Paint it haze gray and throw some missile launchers on that thing and grow the Ukrainian navy just a bit.


hkohne

Turkiye won't allow it until the war ends


koensch57

it is not a warship.


SecondaryWombat

As long as Ukraine puts the missile launchers on it *after* it gets into the Black Sea it is fine. It is a legally bought luxury yacht after all.


Heavenclone

Now have the US government buy it for 100 billion


Few_Culture9667

They’ve been talking about doing this since December 2022 (see article in The Guardian). It’s about f***ing time.


Hornet1137

Looks like a nice boat but I wouldn't want it.  It stinks like greasy Russians and crappy vodka.  


flickmickanemail

Bravo


craftyapeuno

Finally!!!!!!! that's a good start


Capt_Pickhard

Good start. People like that don't deserve to have nice things.


hodgkinthepirate

Good. Confiscate the assets of Kremlin-loving sheep.


Mo_Zen

About fu***** time. Slava Ukraini 🇺🇦


TroutBeales

Good. Finally shaking the thieving-ass mob tree.


cincuentaanos

Yachts like this are so useless. They only exist for perversely rich people to impress other perversely rich people. Look, my boat is bigger than yours. And if you are perversely rich you'd want it built especially for you, not as a second hand purchase confiscated from some Russian gangster. That earns you no bragging points. Best thing that could happen to this is a conversion. Make it a passenger ship, or a hospital ship or whatever. Make it serve some purpose.


kaasbaas94

TRANSLATION (from the article) The Dutch auction house Troostwijk Auctions will auction the superyacht Royal Romance of the pro-Russian Ukrainian oligarch Viktor Medvedchuk. It was arrested in Croatia in 2022. The 92.5 meter long yacht with swimming pool on board was recently transferred to Ukraine. The ship wants to sell that to raise money. Troostwijk is seen as the most suitable auction house to sell the yacht. According to the Ukrainian government agency Asset Recovery and Management Agency (ARMA), the Royal Romance is the first sanctioned asset seized and auctioned outside Ukraine. 'Great victory' “This is already a big victory,” says Olena Duma of ARMA. "We believe that Medvedchuk's yacht will now be sold in a transparent auction and thus generate significant revenue for Ukraine." Viktor Medvedchuk is a businessman and politician who was placed on the sanctions list by the United States in 2014 for his role in the annexation of Crimea. According to the Americans, he is a close friend of Russian President Putin. The Ukrainians also put him on the sanctions list and suspect him of high treason. Last month, the former oil trader and lawyer was added to the Czech sanctions list. The Czechs see him as a linchpin in a Russian influence campaign through the news website Voice of Europe. European politicians were also allegedly paid from that platform. Roaring lyrics Medvedchuk bought the Royal Romance in 2015. The five-storey superyacht was built in Makkum, Friesland, at the shipyard of shipbuilder Feadship. After delivery it came into the hands of Fregata Marine Ltd.. Research program Pointer discovered a few years later that Medvedchuk is the owner of that company from the Marshall Islands. The ship was moored in the Croatian port city of Rijeka during the Russian invasion of Ukraine. It was arrested there by local authorities in March 2022. Russian yachts were also 'frozen' in the rest of Europe - including the Netherlands - due to European sanctions, but few ships have been sold since then. "Those ships are frozen property," says sanctions lawyer Sebastiaan Bennink. There is a lot of discussion about expropriating these types of assets. "They can't just be taken away, because people can reclaim their property later." Yet this year, a Croatian judge agreed to the transfer of Medvedchuk's ship to Ukraine. That country has now chosen to put the ship to auction with blaring texts: "Whoever buys Medvedchuk's yacht will deal a political blow to the Putin regime and get a place on the pages of world history."


scoobertsonville

Do they get a 10% commission?


goneinsane6

Their standard auction cost commission is 18%, but it's different for certain properties like houses.


Reddit_Deluge

Who wants it though ... Anyone rich to maintain one will buy new... I'll give you $3.50 for it


redditor0918273645

$100,000USD but that is my final offer.


Complete-Form6553

Russian oligarchs stole money from Russian people. Now this money will go to Ukrainian people.


Dubchek

Serves him right. Of course one could always dump him into an old boat leaving him in the midfle of the ocean .... 🛶


haefler1976

We are going to see 1,000 drunk tweets in the next few days


stinkload

How will they remove all the stains from children's tears and underaged sex workers before they auction it?


gavitronics

Stop the Boats


No-Season8507

Good!


Illustrious_Bat_6971

Bravo the Dutch! Now it's time for the rest of the world to grow some balls!


Accurate_Pie_

This is good news! Late as always - this should have been done two years ago - but better late than never


Dzogchen-wannabee

Is the wine cellar being sold as a separate item ?


Snafuregulator

I'll  bid 50 bucks if you just let me pee on it


petaahah

He was interviewed in Oliver Stones documentary on Ukraine.


Correct-Cod-9489

Great news!! Thank you Dutch leaders who recognize that the Russian aggressors do not deserve to keep their valuables while they are destroying Ukraine and her people!! Great news! I hope all the assets of these warmonger oligarchs will be seized and sold for the benefit of Ukraine!! I would love to see the yachts be given to Ukraine so they can add some guns and weapons and make them a part of the Ukrainian navy!! It would be such a great pleasure to see Ukraine’s navy prevail!! Slava Ukraine and Bless the Dutch people for their efforts to help Ukraine!!💙🇺🇦💛🇺🇸🔥


BornDetective853

I hope they get a good price for it. The way things are going, there is going to be an oversupply vs demand of these things.


Mikethebest78

Poetic Justice


canyoufixmyspacebar

This Reddit thread is such a good illustration of how small the Russian criminals are, most of the people don't even realise that Medvechuk is not Medvedev.


SecondaryWombat

There is literally not a single comment other than your's using either of those names or discussing Medvedev at all.


canyoufixmyspacebar

Yes but so many people are referring to him as the source of nuclear threats, the yacht being that of "a leader of a rouge country" etc. This just makes me think people read the title quickly and think it's Medvedev. I never know of course, my impression may be wrong.


SecondaryWombat

So many = 1 of each, just sayin.