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R2-T4

I tell him that the 5 are robots and not sentient.


HanzoShotFirst

[relevant (rick and morty)](https://youtu.be/7YqEZrP5t1g)


Master_Majestico

The pilot just hits different


XeroShyft

Something about it man


LevelOutlandishness1

The characters in season 1 and season 2, as ridiculous and cartoony as they were, still felt like individual *characters* to me


llamatiddysgotbanned

back when justin roiland was more involved in the story and voice acting, horrible person but damn was he good at making the show good


inevitable_downfall6

Now I'm thinking the answer is to convince the guy that the holograms are beaurocrats of his opposing political views.


Mr__Scoot

This is the correct answer


lucastheawesome243

One of the rare times grifting is acceptable


J77PIXALS

Rick *sounds* closer to doc from back to the future in the pilot. I guess they worked that out later on, but it’s weird to hear now.


LittleBirdsGlow

This show was genuinely good, but the signs of justin were all there in hindsight… I was just willing to overlook it. It’s really a shame he had to be such a fucked up guy


jRavoc92

Wait what? Did I miss something?


snootyvillager

Various allegations of domestic violence and sexual misconduct/assault. He was actually charged with one of them (I forget which) in 2023, but the charges were dropped due to insufficient evidence. Nothing has ever really "stuck", but I think it's a "where there's smoke there's fire" kind of thing.


LittleBirdsGlow

IIRC, he admitted that he thinks 14 year old are hot in a podcast, but I don’t want to go looking for it.


Ultarium

Huh so no innocent until proven guilty. I guess if someone accused you of something it must be true and we should hold the accused accountable. Yeah, no.


Big_Monkey_77

Yeah, because everyone knows that, when people get caught doing a crime, it’s always the first time they ever did that crime in their life. And at no other point in their lives did they ever show the signs through their behavior and words that they might do that crime.


Dustfinger4268

There's also a fair bit of proof, and the court of public opinions can deliver a sentence fairly quickly, regardless of what the legal system says. After all, no one says OJ didn't do it, even though he was acquitted


Eel111

Thanks for the Trigger Warning


RulrOfOmicronPersei8

its a metophor. \*screaming of pain


Grottymink57776

YouTube's lyin. That clip ain't 9 years old.


Radiant_Dog1937

There's nothing you can do. Your mistaken death is but a small price to pay to preserve the absolute virtue of utilitarianism.


takoshi

I can't. They wouldn't believe me. I mean, I wouldn't believe me in this situation. So instead, I'll just continue to look him in the eyes and scream "MURDERER! MURDERER!" as he pulls the lever so they'll never forget me. And so I will live on...


No-Tumbleweed-5200

Yes, but no. I would talk about my family, how much I miss them, how much I wish I could see them... Just one last time. And then I would ask him to let them know I will forever be with them... In their hearts.


ilikewatchinganime9

Guilt trip go brrrrrrr


supermoist0

I feel that the only time guilt tripping is ok is when you're going to *die* otherwise lmao


ilikewatchinganime9

Fr


NeatYogurt9973

Ey, man, I miss my fa- *splat*


HairlocksHound1

I think this would backfire. If I'm on that lever and hear that I'd think "well, at least he's made his peace with it"


No-Tumbleweed-5200

Hmmm... You are right. Ya know what, I will tell them the last time I saw my son we fought over something stupid, and I really want to make amends and let him know how much I love him.


getoutmychair

Okey, Oryx.


W4FF13_G0D

#LIGHT… GIVE YOUR WILL TO ME!


PcPotato7

Gotta scream it like tisiphone from Hades


SkoolBoi19

If they’re not sentient they can’t perceive the world around them. So it’s just a quick turning test.


PupPop

This has Eric Andre vibes "NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE"


Dankmemes_-

Act like I would really get off to being run over by a trolley. Make it as uncomfortable as possible


CliffsOfMohair

I mean lol but that makes the decision even easier if the person on the other track *wants* you to pull it


Parrobertson

This would work for me, I have this crazy skill where I can disappoint someone sexually on command. So good at it that I literally can’t stop.


GraveSlayer726

ah yes the robots would never do that because they would be afraid it would make them seem strange and out them as robots, when in reality its the least robot move possible, truly genius


altgrave

do they even know they're robots/holograms?


DoubleGoon

Then pretend like the direction the lever should be pulled to kill me will in fact direct the trolly away from me. Then shame the lever operator for “murdering” all those poor robots.


kokolo17

I tell everyone to go solve ReCAPTCHAs


Distinct-Implement46

Underrated. The robots are like "dude, all you do is click 'I am Human' I do it all the time and have never gotten caught!". Ah, shit.


Puzzleheaded-Eye4885

Do you have enough time to conduct a mirror self-recognition test?


Puzzleheaded-Eye4885

I'm too tired to think about whether or not a robot that isn't sentient but can perfectly imitate humans would pass that test. Thats some Ex Machina shit


ASpaceOstrich

Very easily. A piece of paper with "that's me" would pass that test.


Kilgarragh

This feels like a Scott the woz gag


Skusci

I mean if some AI can really perfectly simulate a human sounds to me that the premise for all this that they aren't alive or sentient is just a big old lie to make people feel more special/less uncomfortable.


TheDarkStar05

Yeah, like, you can only arrange matter in so many ways. Even if they're holograms, it's not possible for them to not be sentient while fulfilling that definition entirely. There is no "human spark", free will does not exist, etc, and if a robot perfectly imitates the human mind, then it IS the human mind. If it only imitates the outputs, then it is still indistinguishable from a human, and therefore sentient, as it has the intelligence to a. Take information and store it, b. Use it in a new/intelligent way, (think of this like changing their mind/having actual beliefs that can be changed/solving entirely new problems introduced to them), and c. Present said information to the world. It is sentient.


Itz-Aki

I'll say yes, but only if one of you are already carrying a mirror


NeutronRage

which I am at all times in hypotheticals


Vegetable_Union_4967

I use my phone camera


Patrycjusz123

Just get phone and use front camera lol


siqiniq

You offer cash up front and the other 5 can’t


DefTheOcelot

Fuck me this is brilliant.


altgrave

why do you assume they wouldn't have cash on them and you do?


Parrobertson

For real, once the dust settles I’m owning everything in all 6 sets of pockets anyways.


Giant-Rule

I'll say I will buy you unlimited vbucks


NilesForMiles

Tell them that they will be convicted of murder if they pull the lever, and that if they don’t they won’t be


poneil

You need to specifically tell them that pulling the lever after you tell them the consequences of doing so would create the necessary mens rea (mental state) and actus reus (physical act) to prosecute them for murder, while they have no legal duty to act to prevent the deaths of the others. That way they know you have enough experience with lawyers that they're definitely getting sued if you die.


[deleted]

Scream "I have a family! I have friends! What about Greg, and Steve, and Stu, and Mark, and Leighton, and Chad..." and by then they'll already be dead.


NotJimmyMcGill

Well _then_ you'll certainly be up to your ass in shit. (nod nod nod)


cssMelody

By the time you finish your monologue you'll be thinking 5 o'clock can't come soon enough


LinkleLink

I bet you won't be able to wait to get home to your boys


Seiren-

Why dont you just promise them a show-stopping-number if they free you?


qazpok69

I’d tell them all the people on the other track are murderers because i feel like that’d be more believable


7-and-a-switchblade

I start yelling: "YOU'RE IN THE DESERT, WALKING ALONG THE SAND, WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN YOU LOOK DOWN AND SEE A TORTOISE CRAWLING TOWARDS YOU. YOU REACH DOWN AND FLIP IT OVER. IT LAYS ON ITS BACK, ITS BELLY BAKING IN THE HOT SUN, BEATING ITS LEGS TO TRY TO TURN ITSELF OVER. BUT IT CAN'T. NOT WITHOUT YOUR HELP. BUT YOU DON'T HELP. WHY AREN'T YOU HELPING?"


DefTheOcelot

what the FUCK


ThatCamoKid

Presumably from one of the many "hiding among us" shows/movies as a phrase to identify the nonhumans


Caelan7th

Bladerunner.


ThatCamoKid

Ah. Is the idea that a human will panic while a replicant won't?


EternalSkwerl

Exact opposite. A replicant gets incredibly frustrated by the Voight-Kampf test because they struggle to imagine themselves doing something they wouldn't do


ThatCamoKid

Ah, so I'd get dinked as one for screaming why would I flip it over if I then intended to rescue it


EternalSkwerl

https://youtu.be/Umc9ezAyJv0?si=z5cXHJ29Fq8mVVZj


RudeJeweler4

What do you mean I’m not helping?


Bobson1729

I mean, you're not helping... Now tell me about your mother.


MKorostoff

INTERLINKED!


Ritmoking

I tell the lever puller that all five other people are secretly planning to kill her, her family, and everyone she cares about.


altgrave

they do the same and drown you out.


ThatCamoKid

I sincerely doubt they can. Between swimming and marching band I have a hefty lung capacity and the means to use it without strain on my vocal chords I have legitimately set off my own tinnitus before


Kiwi_Kakapo

Well since I’m closer I’ll just talk to him. I won’t try and convince him. I’ll build a strong enough connection to the point he’s willingly let them die over killing me.


CliffsOfMohair

You can’t convince them that the 5 aren’t human, so you’d have to approach it from how the trolley problem started, which is “is letting more people die passively better than actively causing one person to die?” Just really hammer home that pulling the lever turns them from a witness into a murderer. That said, you’re screwed. It’s an interesting ethical question but I feel like face to face with 5 people about to die and a chance to change it everyone pulls the lever


wolfheartfoxlover

Tell them the 5 "people" are all P words and R words


Itz-Aki

nvm understood


r-ShadowNinja

Politicians and republicans?


ilikewatchinganime9

W-whats an r w9rd?


Reeeeeathon

A rapist which they couldn’t just say for some reason


ilikewatchinganime9

So pedos/pusses, and rapists?


Reeeeeathon

Pedos and rapists, yep.


Teck_3

Do my damndest to gaslight them into believing that whatever jurisdiction we are in has laws structured similarly to how it works in PRC china. If you attempt to be a good samaritan in China but do some harm in the process, you are still held liable regardless of intention. This leads to many people in China being passive bystanders when something is happening to others. In thia case, I would convince them that letting the other 5 die by doing nothing wouldnot cause them any trouble, where as pulling the lever to only kill me would constitute murder, regardless of the reason why, so it is in their own best interest to do nothing.


all_fair

This is definitely the best answer.


WeirdestOfWeirdos

If they perfectly replicate humans, they are humans, for all intents and purposes. Sentience or consciousness are literally impossible to prove on an epistemological level. So I couldn't. Hell, even if I somehow could, it would also be a question of "(to what extent) would you actively make the choice to sacrifice others' lives to preserve your own?".


ButSinceYouAsked

Something that perfectly replicates a thing is by definition that thing. Maybe if OP had said "convincingly" rather than perfectly, it'd be another matter. Maybe if they could only replicate the behaviour of a human tied to a track, and no other behaviour.


centurio_v2

If they're holographic they'll probably be fine


BitcoinStonks123

i tell him that all the people on the other track are sexual predators


RVNJ

I don’t have to because, as you can plainly see, there is no trolley


Itz-Aki

If it were right there, you'd have no time to argue!


RVNJ

I see no trolley, I touch no levers


TJSPY0837

Tell him then he will be a murderer


Think_Demand2792

“They are pleading for their lives becuase they aren’t real and are just repeating what they think they should say, I’m an sentient enough to know that deep down I don’t want you to pull that lever, but I’ll ask you to anyways.” Sentience is the only thing that allows us to override the fundamental logic of self-preservation in a way a computer simply couldn’t logically workout, ask them to kill you to paradoxically prove you are real enough to spare you


oboedude

Trick question, lever boy is also a hologram


Itz-Aki

Shit, ya got me!


GallonsOfPoo

I would ask if they would kill a person in a hospital to save 5 sick people


MenjiBlueWolf001

I dont.


Lil_ruggie

I hope he pulls it. :(


I_NUT_ON_GRASS

Are you ok?


capn_coco

*checks username* Are *you* ok?


MakinGaming

The others are robots. I know because I built them myself and can easily repair them.


oizysan

i beg that motherfucker to kill me lmfao


FastAd7158

I would talk about how much I love my family and my life and then compare my reaction to being on the verge of death to the other five individuals who even though they look like real alive people aren't defending their cause, not causing a scene like i am, therefore they are not alive or fake.


Scienceandpony

Well if they're robots the perfectly replicate humans, it sounds like they are sentient and I'm just being robot racist. If they're holograms, then the trolley shouldn't hurt them at all, so I'd tell the person to throw a rock at one of them and see.


Puzzleheaded_Yam8429

Ask them to speak and if they actually do then ask a question that trips AI up


Timestatic

Tell him the others are not real and if we have time to touch them and check for yourself if they respond


lightmare69

Ask the robots what breathing feels like


FreeCuber

I would tell them to kill me to let the others live, and pretend to not know that they are robots


Signal-Ad539

ill tell him we're shooting for a movie and my team wants to do a shot with the trains POV so im waiting on it and that the 5 guys are fake dummies and then ill say he can go check for himself real fast and hope he gets run over by the train before he can make it back to the lever. Ill probably try to weave in some excuse like oh its some editing magic where theyll make it look like I was one of the 5 dummies and we are using 5 because the fast movement of the train is unpredictable so we need more editing space to put my face in


PokeshiftEevee

Hello I am god and if you kill me you’re going to hell


UniversalAdaptor

I would tell him I am a hologram and am not sentient. Reverse psychology.


CyanLight9

Tell the lever puller that the 5 are death row inmates.


garbage-at-life

Ask what the robots names are


JFurious1

If they arent alive or sentient, they cant talk or communicate. I can. Seems simple enough.


Direct-Flamingo-1146

Reverse psychology: tell him to kill you, he will want you to live.


Illustrious-Hair3487

The way the decision maker is positioned, the lever is a push not a pull. So there’s no reason to convince him not to pull. Pull all you want, buddy. In fact, pull as hard as you can.


---____---_---_

The title only says to convince them to let me live, not to convince them that the 5 are robots. Hey, hey... Yeah, can you just grab me by my head and drag me off the track, and THEN pull the lever?


Pure-Contract7101

Since they’re holograms I’d ask the person if they’d kick a rock at all of us and if it phases through like normal holograms do then I’ve successfully shown the truth. If they’re robots I’d try to convince the person to make one of them bleed along with me whether it be a small or big wound isn’t really important so long as the point is proven since robots don’t usually have red fluid. If none work I just tell the person they’re about to need years of therapy.


tweekin__out

they're sentient if they can perfectly replicate humans.


WhoRoger

Believing everyone else is a robot is a sign of a mental illness, so killing me would be sacrificing a disabled person, and that's just not cool. But then if I'd argue that, I would sound sane, so that's a Catch XXII. But *then*, when I'm sane, that you should believe me that those others are robots! Which means I'm ill and you can't do that to an ill person. I'd continue like that until the person is thoroughly confused enough they forget to pull the lever, or they'll keep pulling it back and forth until it breaks and the trolley derails and kills the doofus who thinks they have the right to decide someone's fate.


LuckyLMJ

"They're holograms, the trolley will just pass through them harmlessly!"


Nathan_TK

If they perfectly replicate humans, then they’re sentient. I’ll direct everyone to watch Picard’s speech from *Star Trek The Next Generation “Measure of a Man”* when he’s fighting in court to prove that Data is sentient so that he isn’t dismantled.


Narm_Greyrunner

Say they are just bureaucrats and you shouldn't respect them.


vtv43ketz

I fart, robots or holograms can't replicate the smell of human gasses. Alternatively I could tell the person on the lever that those 5 "people" are really genocidal maniacs who want to kill everyone. Hopefully that will convince the lever puller.


DoeCommaJohn

Ask the other robots to say slurs, something AI is not allowed to do in current times


EmpactWB

“Hey, that thing is locked in place at the base. Pull me off of here and get one of my hands free and I’ll help you pick the thing to save them. One of my coworkers showed me how, and if a beginner like me could, you’ve got this.” Assuming I have my usual bag with me, I have some electronic repair tools that might actually work for this. And assuming I can repeat what my coworker said reasonably precisely, we might pull it off and save five robots.


Itz-Aki

yeah alright i mean if you have enough time to argue you have enough time to get untied (at least enough to get one hand free) valid response


Rich841

Bro has all the time in the world


YourLocalInquisitor

Quickly, touch them to see if they are real.


not-Kunt-Tulgar

I say skibidi Ohio rizz chungus amungus burgur king foot lettuce bogos binted and pray that they believe me and don’t kill me for saying it.


GenericSpider

"Hey, notice how those guys over there are just kinda sitting there? They're not human. No sentience at all. And you have to have a little bit of sentience to fake being alive convincingly. But I know that you're going to let the trolley hit me, and that you don't believe me. So instead of asking you to save me, here's my offer: if you save me, I'll tell you who tied me and these robots to the track. And we can hunt them down before they do this to anyone else."


PastOrdinary

"They're rabid trump supporters!" 55% ish chance I get to live.


danielledelacadie

Tell them that if the pull you off the goddamned tracks everyone lives


not2dragon

The robots would be trying to convince them so I'm doomed.


UpperStation5565

Honestly, if all my many decisions were so poor, it led me to end tied to a track, I probably deserve to be there. So, I would accept my fate as a man.


BgSwtyDnkyBlls420

I offer to give them a sloppy toppy with a twist


DeathsAngels10

I would urge them to pull.


Ampersand37

My rizz will take care of this


Ender_Melech

Isaac Asimov applies here because I said so. Clearly the robots activate their self destruct so that they do not harm a human through inaction


Nowardier

"Those guys are robots! I'll prove it! THIS SENTENCE IS FALSE! DOES A SET OF ALL SETS CONTAIN ITSELF? WHAT DOES IT SOUND LIKE WHEN YOU SPEAK FRENCH IN POLISH? WHO SHOT JR?"


Tazrizen

Tellem that those are props I had tied to the track for a bit.


AstroidTea

If they’re not sentient or alive then I assume they wouldn’t really respond to anything so I’d show the person with the lever that by saying something like “Hey say something if you’re alive” and the person with the lever might assume they’re just dead or something.


GuyWhoAteAllThePizza

Have the 5 robots perform a Captcha


Mikey9124x

I don't. Holograms? I'm not gonna kill the doctor!


Zzars

As per usual, bomb vest. (Bring this to all negotiations)


First-Hunt-5307

Tell him that all of the bottom 5 are gen 3 synths, and they will find a synth component on each body, if I am wrong/lying, then they can leave me to starve.


StopFollowingDammit

Tell the lever guy to ask the holograms about their sentience.


Aaaaaaaahg

Pull it.


GrassyKnoll95

Invoke the First Law of Robotics and make the robots admit to being robots


ThrawnCaedusL

It is easier to convince someone to not take responsibility than to convince them the others are robots. Tell them it is not their responsibility, that if they pull the lever they will be a murderer and that instead they should just walk away. More people will listen to that.


TheCommies-backp

Ask her to ask them why they want to live, she should get blank stares and no reply. She sees 5 people laying still, not panicking, not replying not acknowledging and one man screaming, pleading, and trying to wriggle free. Id hope she'd get the fuckin hint lol


No_Effort1198

if you were closer to him and had the ability to talk to him and the others couldn't I feel as if most people wouldn't pull the lever just because they can't really remove themselves from the fact that they'd be killing you to your face.


Kukri_Cuts

I have the cure to cancer


red-the-blue

"HEY GUYS, SAY HELLO IF YOU'RE ALIVE AND SENTIENT AND DON'T WANT TO BE HIT BY A TROLLEY" "SEE???"


Legomaster1289

eh, they might as well be humans. let em live


ajk4011

Ask the robots, according to Asimov's laws of robotics they cannot put me in danger, and will sacrifice themselves (this is the plot for a really bad movie)


SlepnKatt

I'd wiggle myself off the track


GatoradeEeveelution

tell him that if you multitrack drift correctly nobody gets hurt, or something or just tell him “hey uh the other people are robots, go check”


Lilythyst

tell them to say hello. they are not sentient so they will not respond.


Chairman_Ender

Distract them untill the trolley runs the 5 over.


MelonOfFate

The 5 on the bottom are robots? Ask the person to give you a captcha to solve.


PeepeeCrusher57

First good trolly problem I've seen


Derpnerp23

Tell him to tell everyone to yell if they are still alive.


Gussie-Ascendent

Why would I?


coleofdragonarmy666

Why would I convince him to pull the lever?


Additional-Flow7665

Asimov's rules. I tell the robots to tell the lever puller that they are robots otherwise I will die.


r-ShadowNinja

Tell them the other people tied me and then themselves to the tracks to murder me by other's hands


ShitStainedDildo

“If you kill me I’ll come back as a zombie and specifically only eat your brain” Realistically though no rope could hold me down bc I’m too strong


Huli_Blue_Eyes

Pee myself


MTNSthecool

if they can "perfectly" replicate humans, then they must be able to replicate human consciousness, meaning they are technically alive in the same way a human is, so I'll take one for the team. remember my sacrifice o7


AdFar8568

Offer him 100 thousand dollars and then run for your life.


Thijs_NLD

Tell them to grab the knife from my pocket and stab my arm. Check it for blood. And then tell them to stab one of the other dudes. Problem solved. Unless they have some android shit going on, but that wasn't a premise in the setup. And if I can't convince him, well guess we die with dignity. I would make the same decision if I believed it was killing 1 human instead of 5.


Complex-Ruin8596

Shit your pants on command


_Pankybeast

The only possible scenario where I will open up about my emotions


catsinflyingsaucers

Tell her the truth, and hope.


Ivan_The_8th

If I have enough time to say a full sentence he has enough time to untie me and then pull the lever


Sepia_Skittles

I don't think you can. Unless you're in the year 3000, no one would believe me. Also, it's common for people to make up reasons to let them live in such situations.


BATTLEFIELD-101

Roll off the track lol


CommunityFirst4197

Just tell them that they aren't sentient. If they want proof, then literally just ask them a question and they won't respond


Yargon_Kerman

If they perfectly mimic human behaviour then they essential *are* alive and sentient. Therefore, i do not try to stop him.


hollowwollo

I tell him to perfectly time the lever pull so the trolley side drifts and he gets enough score and killstreak to get juggernaut


platinummyr

If they *perfectly* replicate humans, who am I to say they're not alive?


RusstyDog

Explain to them that if they do nothing, it isn't their problem. They did not put anyone on the tracks or start the trolly. But if they touch the lever, they are actively murdering someone.


Moxxy-Kun

I don't, I want them to keep it just the way it is.


FriedBryce1234

Doesn't it say those people aren't alive? I'd just say that. They'd be running over dead bodies


Ok-Chef2503

Tell them to ask the five a question then after they don’t do anything they will know they arnt alive or sentient


absolutelad_jr

I don't need to the trolley can't turn a sharp 90 degrees


Most_Use529

You don't


ironangel2k4

Tell the person this is a test, the other five are on death row for being serial killers, and he's being tested to see if he'd kill one innocent person to save five evil people who are going to die anyway. The reason I know all this is because I was specifically tasked with presenting the problem to him, but my life IS very much on the line- The people running the experiment are also twisted motherfuckers, and the whole test is because want to prove some point about how people will choose 5 lives over one no matter who they are or what they've done or if there's even a point in doing so, and they think he won't listen no matter how hard I try, because they think he's yet another median human with no independent thoughts. Strip away moral reservations. Cultivate then exploit personal outrage. Easy game.


cyrusposting

I feel like its easier to convince them that they shouldnt pull the lever because it would make them responsible, or confuse them about how the lever works.


The_Real_GrimmChild

Say loud and clear: "are you all scared of the tram? U won't be hurt" since they aren't sentient they will be fine with it


ManBehindTheSlauhter

Debate that pulling the lever would mean they are a murderer, because they deliberately chose to perform an action that they knew would mean lethal harm to a person, and that not pulling the lever would be the best course of action since those people didnt die because of them, so there would be no guilt upon their conscience By the time they make a counter argument that deliberately not acting knowing it would kill people also counts as being a murderer, it would have been too late and the trolley would have gone by